-Chapter 37- Do you?-

-Santana pov-

4 days I've been in this hospital. 4 day's I've been looking at the same walls with the same lights. I hate hospitals so much! Luckily I'm going home today. Mami is currently signing me out and finalizing the buddy papers. Rachel and Fran are going to be my support buddies.

I wasn't sure about it but Rachel thinks it's a great idea. I owe it to Rachel to try to program. I could've pushed her to where I am now...I owe her. I sigh and look at the bear sitting beside me. Quinn got it for me a few day's ago. He's gonna have a permanent resting place by or on our bed from now on.

"Alright" I look at the doorway and to my mom "It's time to go"

I smile and she walks over to me. She helps me out of the bed and into the wheelchair. This is going to be a depression battle right here. I don't wanna be in this thing cause I want to be up like everyone else. I know we have time till December but still.

I want to be prepared for Regionals. If we win then that's a step closer to New York for everyone. It's a step closer out of Lima. I can't let the blazers down. I can't hold that weight.

"You're in your head" I look up at my mom and realize we are at the car "Wanna talk about it?"

"Maybe later" She makes a unsure face and I grab her hands "It's fine Mami really"

"Ok" She gives me a forehead kiss and opens my door "Lets get you in the car"

-Time skip-

"Why are we at the school?" I look at my Mami who's quiet "What's going on?"

"Just relax" She pulls into her spot and smiles at me "Everything will be fine"

I take her word for and nod. She gets out and comes to get me out too. I'm put into the chair and wheeled inside. She takes me to the Blazers room door. She stops and knocks a few times. I hear movement before Brittany steps out.

"Santana!" She gives me a quick hug before stepping back up to the doors "How are you doing?"

"Good" we all jump when there's crash "What's going on in there?"

"Nothing!" Rachel steps out looking nervous "What's new with you?"

"You know I don't like surprises either" Rachel looks away from me "Talk to me buddy"

A knock comes from the other side "We can see now" The doors open and my jaw drops "This is your welcome back!"

I'm wheeled into the room fully and everyone yells surprise. I feel the tears come to my eyes as I see their smiling faces. They actually care about my well being.

"Hey fancy lady" Sebastian walks over with a cup of punch "How you feeling?"

"Better than I was" He hands me the cup "Thank you"

"Anything for our family" Sebastian looks at the chair "You know how long?"

"Hopefully not too long" I sigh and look at everyone talking "I just wanna be up and going"

"In the best and worst times" I look at him confused and he just walks away "You'll figure out"

"San!" I turn and smile at my girlfriend "How are you? Did you like the surprise?"

"I loved it and I love you" She smiles brightly and if I could do anything to keep it I would "How are you?"

"It's more important about how you are" She grabs my wheelchair and start wheeling me around "So how are you? You didn't answer"

"Quinn I'm fine" I push the lock and the chair stops "What's wrong?"

"Unlock it" I do and she wheels me away from everyone. She stands in front of me and I can finally see the bags under her eyes "I just want to make sure you're truly fine"

"How much have you ate?" She looks away and mumbles something "Answer me Quinn"

"Barely anything" She sighs and looks at me "I just want to make sure everything will be ok for you"

"Eat now" She shakes her head no "Judy!"

"Santana!" Quinn looks up scared as footsteps get closer "If you love me you would call her off"

"If I hated you I would" What Sebastian says clicks in my head "Do you still love me?"

"Of course" she looks at my chair "I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't"

"So you have loved me through my good and bad" She looks at me confused "Let me love you in the bad"

"What are you two doing over here?" Judy walks up with a smile but quickly looks worried "What's going on?"

"Quinn hasn't been eating" Judy looks up at Quinn shocked "She's been worrying about me and trying to make everything better"

"You are eating this instant Quinn" Judy puts a hand on Quinn's shoulder "I don't want you ending up in the hospital or getting a eating disorder! I'm glad this seems to be the first time"

"You never told her?" Quinn glares at me while Judy looks at me confused "Quinn used to vomit everything up for cheerleading all the time"

"I see" Judy looks at Quinn with a super serious expression "We will talk about this later ok? First you need to eat"

"Ok mom" Judy walks away and Quinn looks at me "I'm mad but I still love you"

"You would've done the same thing" She nods and I grab her hand "This is my party! You can't stay mad at me"

"Just be glad I love you" She lets go of my hand and wheels me toward the food table "Let's eat"

-Time skip-Judy pov-

"Mari...can we talk?" Maribel nods and we walk outside of the room "How did you deal with Santana not eating during the cheerio days?"

"She did what?!" Oh shit "I'm gonna kill her!"

Maribel walks angrily back into the room leaving me behind. I run in and stop her as she stalks toward Santana. She glares at me and tries fighting me away.

"We can do this a better way" Maribel stops struggling against me "Lets talk with Emma first ok?"

"Fine" She sighs and looks at me normally "Have you seen Shelby?"

"As a matter of fact I haven't" We both look around but there's no sign of our third part being here "Where could she be?"

"We did tell her right?" We go silent before running out of the room "Where could she be?"

I shrug and we run around the halls. We run past a janitor closet and I swear I hear crying. I stop and sure enough I do. Maribel walks over to me and I point to the room.

"Hello?" The crying stops and sniffles start as they try to be quiet "Are you ok?"

There's no response "Shelby?" Still nothing "We are coming in"

Maribel pulls out her key and unlocks it. She opens the door and my heart breaks at the sight. Shelby is crying in the corner by herself. Her eyes are all puffy so she's been here awhile.

"Finally realize I wasn't at the party?" I cringe at the venom she spits with her words "You know I count her like a daughter too! I'm just as happy she's back! I LIVE WITH YOU ALL!"

"Shelby we just fo~"

"Eight nights ago" We look at each other confused then back to Shelby "We were supposed to watch movies and have a nice relaxing night...I was alone on that couch waiting...when I went to bed I found you two cuddling without me"

"Shit" I remember what Shelby is talking about now "I had a headache and Maribel was comforting me..I thought we told you"

"NO!" Shelby shakes her head as new tears fall "You keep pulling away...do you two even want me here truly?"

"I gave you a family heirloom" Maribel smiles "Of course I want you here"

"I can't be bought like some cheap hooker!" Shelby stands up angry "You two keep saying the kids need to find themselves as Fran does too! The two people that need self exploration are truly you two! Find me when you have"

Shelby pushes past us as she runs away. I hear a strangled sob and don't realize it was even mine. I'm now in Maribels arms as she tries to piece everything together.

"How do we never notice when things are going so wrong?" I look up at her and see the tears starting to fall "How do we never notice the problems?"

"Because we don't want to notice them" I wrap my arms around her "We just wanna wish them away"

We stay in the janitor closet in each other's arms for a bit. After a while we had to the party and just oversee it. I just have one thing stuck in my head.

Do I want Shelby?