Notes:

I can't believe it's been so long since I last posted. But work hasn't let up and I work in front of a computer screen all day and thus sometimes can't face sitting in front of a screen in my free time as well. My eyes feel very rectangular at the moment.

The total word count of this story is making me slightly nauseous at times, because the end is being pushed further away. I really thought this would be a short(ish) story when I first started.

This chapter heavily features our two favorite people. But I also like the Tyrion and Jaime scene a lot. As well as the "revival" of one other character. I'm curious to find out what you think about that scene.

As always, thanks a lot for the reviews!


In the middle of the night, Jorah was woken by movement next to him. Daenerys was having nightmares again. He was torn between waking her and letting her sleep. For a while, he just waited and listened, hoping the nightmare would go away. But Daenerys woke on her own. Jorah pulled her close. "Are you alright?"

She returned his embrace and was silent for a while, taking deep breaths to calm herself. "I thought… I thought the nightmares would stop." Especially with Jorah there.

"They will eventually. It takes time."

"I know they are just dreams but…"

"They appear real?"

"Very real. And often they are more cruel and scarier than reality."

"What scares you the most?"

Daenerys didn't want to think about her fears. She had worked so hard to ignore them. But it hadn't really worked, had it?

"You can't run away from them," Jorah said gently. "Or they will follow you forever."

Daenerys felt silly that she was so upset by some dreams.

"You can tell me anything."

"Losing you," Daenerys whispered. "Losing more people I care about." Not that there were many left. "Making a wrong decision."

"You can never make everybody happy with your decisions."

"I am not worried about displeasing the noble houses. Besides, it seems I am doing that constantly."

Jorah chuckled.

"I don't want to cause any more pain and suffering for my people. They have been through so much already. My father terrorized them. Robert didn't care about them. And Cersei despised them. They deserve a better ruler."

"You are a better ruler."

Daenerys remained silent for a long time before she spoke again. "Sometimes… I dream about my father."

"Your father?" Daenerys had never met Aerys. It was impossible for her to have any memories of him.

"It's a mixture of stories Viserys told me and what I know from Ser Barristan and Ser Jaime. And what I imagine he was truly like. Especially in the end… when he… turned mad."

Jorah knew where this was going. "You are not going to turn mad. You are nothing like your father. You care about your people." To a point where she disregarded her own needs.

"I will never use Drogon as a weapon again," she decided. Simply saying that somehow lifted a burden from her shoulders.

For her sake, Jorah hoped she would never have to again.

"Do you think Rhaegar turned mad?" Daenerys asked.

"Rhaegar? Mad?" Her question took Jorah by surprise. "What makes you say that?"

"Ser Barristan told me he was a gentle person. My brother liked to play the harp. He disguised himself as a commoner and played in the streets of King's Landing. People gave him money, which Rhaegar gave to the needy. Ser Barristan said Rhaegar loved singing, not killing."

"Yes, that's what people say." And many people had placed high hopes on Rhaegar.

"Then why did he betray his wife and children? Why did he run away with Lyanna, causing a war? He must have known what the consequences would be."

"Rhaegar might have been one of the reasons the war started, but it was Aerys who killed Rickard and Brandon Stark. Aerys' madness wasn't a secret. He had to be stopped."

"Rhaegar should have stopped our father," Daenerys said with anger in her voice. "As heir to the throne, it was his responsibility to protect his people. But instead he ran off with Lyanna."

Jorah thought about that for a long time. It was indeed difficult to comprehend. "Maybe it was Lyanna's idea. She was a wild child. It wouldn't surprise me if she didn't want to marry Robert."

"Even if that was the case, Rhaegar went along with it."

"Love sometimes makes us do stupid things," Jorah replied. He knew from experience.

"Yes," Daenerys whispered.


Tyrion kept running. But each time he turned around, Varys was right behind him. When he thought his legs wouldn't carry him anymore Tyrion stopped. He waited for Varys to pounce on him. But nothing happened. Slowly, Tyrion turned around. Varys stopped and just looked at him with those dead, ice-blue eyes.

"This is a dream, isn't it?" Tyrion asked.

"Very likely," Varys remarked dryly.

Tyrion examined Varys carefully. His clothes were hanging off him in tatters. His ghastly white skin didn't look much better. "I hate this dream."

"Understandable."

"How can I make it end?"

Varys shrugged his shoulders.

"I miss you, old friend."

"You shouldn't have gotten me killed then," Varys deadpanned.

"Yeah… about that… I'm sorry."

"Won't make me unburnt. It's really no fun to get burnt by a dragon, you know."

"I can imagine."

"I doubt you can."

"Maybe I can't. But if I could choose between being burned by a dragon and," he pointed at Varys, "that, I think I would choose the fire."

Varys looked down at himself. "Easy for you to say. It's your fault I ended up dead."

"I already said I'm sorry," Tyrion replied.

"Do you regret getting me killed?"

"I regret that you are dead."

"Not the same thing. So you would do it again?"

Tyrion didn't know how to answer that.

"You would back her again? You would choose a tyrant over your friend? I saved your life. I got you out of King's Landing. And how did you thank me? You rat me out to Daenerys, knowing full well that it was my death sentence. It wasn't Drogon who killed me. It wasn't Daenerys who killed me. You killed me."

Tyrion did feel guilty about what had happened to Varys. But Tyrion wasn't prepared to take full blame for it. "Actually, it's your fault. You committed treason."

"I simply did the right thing," Varys said.

"You wanted to overthrow Daenerys. You tried to poison her."

"Events have proven me right. She did turn mad."

"No, she hasn't."

"You know I am right."

"You were wrong," Tyrion insisted. "And you made everything worse."

"Oh, really? Now I am responsible for what happened?"

"I didn't say that. You just didn't… it wasn't helpful what you did."

Varys laughed. "Keep lying to yourself, if that makes you feel better."

"I'm not… I… You were wrong. You betrayed her because you felt guilty about Aerys. You wished you had stopped the Mad King. You were afraid that history would repeat itself. So you betrayed Daenerys. But you acted rashly. You never really gave her a chance."

"You are afraid of her. You can't handle her. That's why you sent for Ser Jorah."

"I couldn't help her. You were wrong about her. And I will prove it to you!"

Varys just started laughing. Then he suddenly pounced on Tyrion.

Tyrion woke up. "I hate that dream," he groaned and took a deep breath. "Well, at least I got the last word tonight."


Tyrion decided to take a walk. He wasn't keen on another encounter with Varys tonight. The corridors of Casterly Rock were empty, except for the occasional soldier standing guard here and there. Due to his size, Tyrion was easy to recognize, even in the semi-darkness. He did not need to be afraid that anyone would take him for an intruder.

"Can't sleep?" a familiar voice asked from behind.

"I can. But let's just say I don't like the company," Tyrion replied and turned around to face his brother.

Jaime was confused as to what or whom Tyrion was alluding to.

"The company in my dreams," Tyrion clarified. "What keeps you awake, dear brother?"

Jaime remained silent.

Tyrion didn't really need to ask. It was more a polite offer, in case his brother wanted to talk about it. "Women, eh? I am glad I don't have your problems."

"Well, you have the Queen who gives you trouble," Jaime pointed out. "I hear she escaped today."

"Since you mention it, you are responsible for her safety. It isn't safe for her outside the walls. Why wasn't the Queensguard with her?"

"I discussed it with Grey Worm and Ser Jorah. They didn't want to attract attention, so the Queensguard stayed behind. Besides, Grey Worm doesn't trust the Queensguard with the Queen's safety. We have become ceremonial bodyguards." Strangely, it didn't really bother Jaime. He didn't know what to do with himself anyway and this way he at least got to spend time with his brother.

This time it was Tyrion who stayed silent.

"I don't think anyone around here wants Daenerys dead," Jaime said. "At least not the common people."

"This is Casterly Rock. Right over there is Lannisport. There are people left who fought for Cersei."

"Cersei is dead. Her children are dead. No one else besides Daenerys has a claim to the throne."

At least no one who wanted it, Tyrion thought. "Robert didn't have a claim. He just took."

"Aerys was mad. He deserved to die. Besides, people are tired of the tug-of-war. I certainly am."

"Did Cersei deserve to die?" Tyrion asked.

"Why do you ask me that?" Jaime asked surprised. "You led an army against her to Westeros."

"I am asking you because no one knew her better than you."

Jaime took a deep breath and then exhaled slowly. "Cersei would have never stopped. She would have never accepted defeat. She would have sacrificed all of King's Landing without a second thought. Once Cersei made a decision, she refused to back down or change her mind, out of principle. She would never admit that she was wrong. Cersei didn't care one bit about the people of King's Landing. Sheep, she called them. And after the High Sparrow made her walk through the city naked and the people flung rotten fruit and excrements at her… Cersei doesn't forgive easily. She would have rather destroyed the city than let it be taken by Daenerys."

Jaime was right. Cersei was ambitious and unrelenting. And forgiveness was not one of her qualities. Nevertheless, Tyrion was somewhat surprised to hear his brother talk like that. He had expected Jaime to defend Cersei, at least a little bit.

"This shouldn't be news to you," Jaime said. "She wanted you dead. Have you already forgotten that? She killed many members of noble families when she blew up the Sept. Including Uncle Kevan. Cersei was ruthless."

"And you loved her anyway," Tyrion said.

"I did."

"Until Brienne," Tyrion added.

"Brienne had nothing to do with it."

Tyrion raised an eyebrow, not sure he should believe his brother's words.

"Okay, yeah, maybe a little bit. But not what you are thinking." Brienne had challenged him to do the right thing. "When Cersei refused to fight the wights together with the North, I realized what a cold-hearted monster she was." He raised his hands, preempting objection from Tyrion. "Yes, I knew before. But I couldn't look away anymore. I couldn't ignore it anymore. I knew I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I followed Cersei's orders. I was disgusted by her. When I left King's Landing I knew nothing would ever be the same between her and me."

"But she did love her children," Tyrion said. For some silly reason he didn't understand, Tyrion needed to believe that his sister had possessed at least some compassion, no matter how small.

"Yes. But with nothing to lose she was unpredictable. She had to be stopped. Daenerys did the right thing. Or Cersei would have done worse."

Tyrion wasn't sure what he had expected to hear from Jaime, but not this. Tyrion had struggled with the attack on the Red Keep ever since it had happened. To find out his brother actually agreed with what Daenerys had done was unexpected.

"Someone had to do it," Jaime said.

Tyrion looked at him. Did Jaime mean to imply that…? "Would you have…?"

Jamie sighed. "She was pregnant with my child."

"And if she hadn't been?"

"It doesn't matter anymore, does it?" Jaime didn't even want to think about it.

"May I give you some advice?"

"You will anyway."

Tyrion grinned. "I will." Turning serious, he went on, "You don't belong here anymore."

"I belong nowhere anymore. At least this," he pointed at his uniform, "I know how to do."

"You should be with Brienne."

Jaime started laughing. "When did you become a romantic again? I thought father had knocked that out of you for good."

"Yes, he did. But he underestimated me all his life. The least I can do is to continue disappointing him even after his death."

"That's dedication," Jaime said with a smirk.

"You are the only person in this world I still care about. You are my brother and I love you. And I want you to be happy." Tyrion greatly valued all the time he had been able to spend with his brother the last few months. They had always been close, but the last months had brought them closer together again.

"You don't care about the Queen anymore?" On purpose Jaime didn't say 'our' Queen. He was serving Daenerys but his Queen was dead.

Tyrion sighed. "I do care about her. But it seems we have reached a point where we can never regain the trust we once had. I wish… I wish it was possible. But too much has happened." He wanted it to be like it had been in Meereen between them, when she had appointed him as her Hand. Why did she even keep him as her Hand?

"She seems restless, haunted even." Jaime recognized such traits easily in other people nowadays. Maybe because he felt similar.

"Ride north, Jaime. Ride to Winterfell."

Again, Jaime just laughed.

"What do you have to lose? I doubt Brienne has found someone else."

"I know her answer. I treated her horribly."

"Brienne acts like a brute at times. But she is a woman. And there is a heart beneath that armor. Maybe an apology is all it needs."

"I doubt it." Jaime had hurt her too deeply. And Brienne was a very proud person.

"But you don't know for sure. So go and find out."

"Even if. What would I do in the North? Jon Stark won't have any need of me. Besides, I almost killed his father. And I almost… killed his brother."

"Bran?"

Jaime nodded.

Tyrion had long suspected as much. "Jon doesn't know that."

"Bran might have told him by now."

"He didn't at your trial."

Jaime just shrugged his shoulders.

"Jon is very forgiving. More forgiving than Brienne, I would think. And you fought with him against the wights. He's the least of your problems."

For a moment, Jaime was tempted. He had nothing left here. He had just come to Casterly Rock because of his brother. But Brienne deserved better. He was a wreck and a Lannister.

"I never thought you would ever look at another woman like you looked at Cersei. You've got a chance. Not many people can say that. Don't waste it!" If Tyrion had a chance to say sorry to Shae, he would. He would swim across the Narrow Sea and back for the chance to talk to Shae just one more time. And he was a lousy swimmer. Tyrion would try anything to win her back. But he couldn't.

"One shouldn't make such decisions in the dead of the night," Jaime said evasively.

"Maybe one should," his brother replied.


"You can rebuild the sept," Daenerys said. "But only if the workers are paid adequately and they will be well fed while working for you. And the sept should be smaller than the old one."

"But-" the Great Septon started.

"You want people to use it as soon as possible. The bigger it becomes, the longer it will take. Besides, you claim your faith is a humble one. The last sept was anything else but humble."

"I do agree, your Grace."

"The sept will be open to everyone, not just the noble houses."

"Of course."

"If the snow becomes too heavy, if the weather becomes too cold, you will stop building."

The Septon nodded. "We were hoping that the Queen of the Six Kingdoms would support the rebuilding."

"I am Queen of all people. I will not endow one faith over the other."

"I understand you grew up in Essos. If your Grace would allow me to explain the Faith of the Seven-"

"That won't be necessary. I know what I need to know. I will not endow one faith over the other," she repeated.

"But-"

"You may use the stones from the Red Keep. As soon as the initial drawings are done, you will discuss them with Lord Tyrion. That is all."

The Great Septon nodded and left.

"How are our plans for Lannisport progressing?" Daenerys asked.

"We are still looking for the right location," Tyrion replied. "Am I right to assume you want me stationed there?"

"No, I want you here at Casterly Rock. I was thinking the position might be something for Ser Davos. He is a patient man and very good with people."

"Indeed, he is," Tyrion agreed.

"Besides, I am not sure he is very happy with being part of the council."

"Ser Davos isn't the chatty type."

"I know. But he seems frustrated at times. Please talk to him. If Ser Davos refuses, I don't know whom else we could send."

"You mean you are not sure whom else you could trust with this," Tyrion rephrased.

Daenerys nodded. She didn't trust the other members of the council to act unselfishly and put the needs of her people first.

Tyrion was just about to ask her outright if that also included him, when Daenerys stood up.

"I will retire for the night," she said. "We will continue tomorrow."

"Of course. Sleep well, your Grace."


Before Jorah's arrival at Casterly Rock, Daenerys had dreaded returning to her quarters at night. It had been lonely and she had been left alone with her own thoughts. But now with Jorah there, she was looking forward to the end of the day. To find refuge in his arms. To be herself with him. To be more than just a queen. To be a woman with faults, doubts, feelings and desires.

After dinner, they usually spent some time sitting in front of the fire, talking or reading or just enjoying each other's company. Sometimes, Daenerys just stared into the flames and Jorah left her alone with her thoughts.

"Why don't you take a husband?" Jorah asked one night.

"Has Tyrion put you up to this?"

"No," he replied calmly.

"What's the point in me marrying? I can't have children. What would I need a husband for?"

"So that you are not so lonely."

"And where do I find a husband that won't try to subdue me, won't try to control me, won't try to overthrow me, won't try to kill me?"

"You are exaggerating."

"Am I?" She gave him a challenging look. "Make one reasonable suggestion."

After all the wars and granting the North its independence, there weren't that many options left for her. The Iron Islands didn't have a male heir. And Yara Greyjoy was also ruling without a husband. Robin Arryn was too young and a weakling. The rest were either dead, children, already married or had once been loyal to House Lannister. "The Prince of Dorne," Jorah said. House Martell had many reasons to want a Targaryen on the throne.

"I already turned him down."

"I doubt he will object if you change your mind."

Daenerys remained silent. She didn't want to marry. And it wasn't necessary. She would gain nothing by it. House Martell was loyal and would remain so, she was certain of it. "Would that make it easier for you? Leaving, I mean. If there was someone else?"

Easier? That was not the word Jorah would choose. "I just… I don't want you to be lonely."

Daenerys nodded almost imperceptibly. Strange how one could be lonely with so many people around. But she knew that even a husband wouldn't change that. "I almost went to Qhono once," Daenerys said softly. She looked at Jorah, closely observing his reaction. She hadn't planned on telling him this.

Jorah's heart skipped a beat. He didn't expect her to be abstinent. But he didn't have to rejoice at the thought of her spending time with someone else. "I want you to be happy. And I have no right to be jealous."

Daenerys stood up from her chair and walked closer to the fire, watching the flames dance. "I wanted to forget. To feel something. To feel a connection with someone."

"Why didn't you go to him?" Jorah asked carefully.

Daenerys turned around to face him. "The Dothraki way of making love," she laughed, "if you can call it that, is not exactly ideal for connecting with someone."

Jorah nodded in understanding.

"I would have been fooling myself," Daenerys went on. "I would have felt the need to stay in control. I wouldn't have been able to let go." Slowly, she came closer and closer to where Jorah was sitting, until she was standing right in front of him. Daenerys reached out and stroked his cheek. "Like I can with you."

Jorah covered her hand with his.

"It would have been a mistake," Daenerys said. "I would have regretted it. Because he wouldn't have been you." She wanted to tell Jorah that she loved him. But it wouldn't be fair to him. Daenerys had lost the right to tell him. No, she hadn't lost it, she had given it up. She had set things in motion that couldn't be undone anymore. There was nothing either of them could do about it. So instead of telling him she closed the distance between them and kissed him. The kiss was short but tender and a promise for more.

Jorah looked deep into her eyes and saw that she was speaking the truth. Daenerys was describing what he had tried to make Tyrion understand. It wasn't about sleeping with each other. There was much more between them. It was common knowledge among the people who had been with her since Essos that Jorah loved her. And Daenerys was allowing it. She wasn't even discouraging him. There were even moments when Jorah could almost imagine that she loved him back. When she kissed him. When she touched him. When she looked at him in that particular way. Like she did at that very moment.

Daenerys placed her hands on his shoulders for support and leaned forward. "I want you," she whispered against his lips. She knew she could never have him completely. Not anymore. Therefore she wanted to make the most of the time she had left with him.

Jorah rested his hands on her hips. "Then why did you sent me away?"

Daenerys froze. Her face became unreadable. She tried to pull back, but Jorah didn't let go of her.

"You said you wanted me to live my life." A life he had forgone a long time ago. A life he hadn't wanted since the day Daenerys had stepped out of that fire in the desert.

She couldn't look him in the eye. "Yes."

Jorah let go of her hips. Instead, he took both of her hands in his. This time he was determined to get an answer. "And now? Would you still send me away?"

He had asked her before and Daenerys had evaded the question. Jorah's eyes were pleading with her for the truth. "I sent you home, where you belong."

"I would just like to know." Jorah knew it wouldn't change anything.

"If I had not sent you home… we both know you would have stayed. I couldn't allow that. You might have come to hate yourself for abandoning Bear Island and your people. I know you still feel guilty about what happened years ago." Daenerys took a deep breath before she continued. "So yes, I would make the same decision again."

Jorah couldn't hide a flicker of disappointment at her words.

"Because it was the right decision." Not because it was what she wanted. "Because you deserve a home and a family. Because it would have been selfish to… I…" Daenerys closed her eyes for a moment, collecting her thoughts. Jorah deserved the truth, at least part of it. "I wanted you to stay. I wanted you to stay even when I banished you in Meereen. I wanted you to stay, when you lay almost dead in my arms. I wanted you to stay," she looked at him with sorrow and longing at the same time, "with me."

"Daenerys…"

"I want you to be safe. I've lost you too many times. When I thought I might lose you forever… You have served me for so many years. You have fought so many battles for me. Never again. I've lost Drogo and Rhaego, Irri and Ser Barristan, Viserion and Rhaegal and Missandei. Not you. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I were to cause your death. Or if I had been the cause of the end of your house. I'm Queen of the Six Kingdoms. I once thought that meant I always get what I want. But it doesn't. It means I have to make the best decision for my people. Even if it is not what I want."

Jorah pondered her words. She was right that he wouldn't have left her on his own account. He might have gone home for a little while, making sure everything was going well on Bear Island. But the last time he had seriously considered returning to Bear Island had been back in Essos. Jorah also understood that she had lost many people and that the mere thought of losing someone else must be very troubling to her. But the fighting was over. And Daenerys wasn't in any more danger than she had been since the day she was born, much less so. Besides Jon there was no one strong enough, or with enough supporters, to take the throne from her. Everyone was tired of fighting. The constant wars were why many regions were ill-prepared for winter. And no one with a little bit of sense would try to overthrow her now that winter had arrived. But what surprised Jorah the most was that she would care more about the continuation of his house than he had himself.

"Are you angry at me for making the decision for you?" Daenerys asked. His long silence was starting to worry her.

"No." Strangely, he truly wasn't angry at her. "I was angry at Lyanna for a long time."

"Lyanna? Why?"

"Because she risked her life. Because she got killed and left me to pick up the pieces." Jorah knew how selfish and unfair that thought was. But sometimes he couldn't help it. "And I am angry at myself because I couldn't convince her to stay away from the battle. I should have protected her."

"It wasn't your fault. Lyanna was stubborn." And you protected me instead, Daenerys thought.

"She shouldn't have had to carry such a burden so early in life. I failed her."

"Jorah…" Was that how it was for him, when she was blaming herself? "You couldn't have known."

He bowed his head in shame. He couldn't have known that any of them would survive. He couldn't have known that he would survive and Lyanna wouldn't. Lyanna had been too young to see the bigger picture. He had failed his cousin in so many ways.

Daenerys crouched down in front of him so that she could look into his face. "Didn't you tell me that we are all very wise in hindsight?"

Jorah gave her a half-hearted smile. "Yes, that might have been me."

"How am I supposed to believe that, if you don't believe it yourself? You either have to agree that it also applies to you or you have to admit that you only said it to make me feel better."

Jorah smiled and this time it was genuine. "Do I have to make a decision right this very moment?" he asked with a grin.

"You may think about it. In the meantime…" Daenerys put her arms around his neck and kissed him.

Jorah pulled her against his body. They stayed like this for quite a while, lost in each other's kisses. The only sounds in the room were the crackling of the fire and an occasional sigh from the woman in his arms.

Eventually, Daenerys pushed slightly away from him to catch her breath. "We should move to a more comfortable location."

"Whatever my Khaleesi demands."

"It's not a demand. Just a suggestion."

"A good one."

"So my most trusted advisor agrees?"

"I can see no flaw in that plan," Jorah replied with a smile.

Daenerys got up and undressed in front of the fire, facing the flames, where the heat would warm her skin.

"The Unburnt," Jorah murmured and went to her. He placed a kiss on her neck.

Daenerys moaned softly.

"I love you," Jorah whispered.

If the flames were keeping her warm, Jorah's words were igniting a fire of their own inside her. Daenerys was glad that Jorah couldn't see her face, because she had trouble keeping the tears at bay. But having plenty of practice at keeping her emotions under control, she regained her composure before a tear could form and escape her eyes. Slowly, Daenerys turned around to face Jorah. She smiled and tenderly stroked his cheek. "Then take me to bed. Because as long as you are here, I am yours."


"Why do you keep me as your Hand?" Tyrion asked.

"What?"

"Why am I still your Hand?"

Daenerys looked at him with concern. "Why shouldn't you be?"

"You don't trust me anymore." Tyrion said it without any accusation in his voice. "You could easily make Grey Worm your Hand. Or Ser Davos."

"I want you as my Hand."

"May I ask why?"

"You are a wise man. I value your counsel."

"Do you really? I can understand that my counsel was valuable when we were trying to stop my sister. But now that she is gone…"

"You are still a wise man."

"Who made a lot of mistakes." Including accusing Jorah of taking advantage of her. Tyrion felt rather silly about that now. He finally saw what Jorah had been trying to tell him. Daenerys had needed someone to look beyond the Queen. And only Jorah had been able to do that.

"We all make mistakes."

"You don't trust my counsel," Tyrion insisted.

"When I sent Jorah away in Meereen I missed his counsel, despite what he had done. I think I would miss your counsel too. And eventually I learned to trust Jorah again."

"His second banishment was my fault. Maybe that was bad advice too."

"Don't be too harsh on yourself," Daenerys said. "He saved my life in the arena."

"Had you pardoned Jorah, he would have been right by your side and saved your life anyway."

Daenerys laughed. "You seem very certain of that."

"Ser Jorah is in the habit of being exactly in the right place when your life is in danger."

"Indeed." Just like Jorah had appeared at Casterly Rock when she had needed him the most.

They were both silent for a while.

"If there is anything I can do to help you restore your trust in me..."

Daenerys smiled at him, genuinely. "Just be patient with me."

Tyrion nodded.

"I won't follow anybody's counsel blindly. I never have."

"That isn't a bad thing."

"If it appears that I don't trust you… that might not be because of you or your counsel." Daenerys hesitated for a moment. Should she really share this with Tyrion? But if they wanted to move forward, she had to trust him again. "It's just that… sometimes… I don't trust myself."

Tyrion looked at her, realizing that she was revealing something very personal. "What do you mean?" he asked carefully.

"Because of what happened with the Red Keep." She had never admitted to anyone but Jorah that she sometimes doubted her actions in hindsight. Officially, she had always maintained that it had been the only way to stop Cersei.

"I know we have disagreed on this particular decision. But… I talked to my brother and he made me realize something. I couldn't see it before. Maybe I didn't want to because – after all – she was my sister. Or maybe I just wanted to be better than her. But Jaime said it with such clarity and conviction, there was no doubt in his mind, and I realized that I agree with him."

"Agree on what?"

"You had to stop Cersei," Tyrion replied. "We gave her the chance to surrender, but she refused." Tyrion had never truly believed that Cersei would give up without a fight. But he'd had to try. In hindsight, that had been foolish. Had he just suggested it to postpone the inevitable? Or to silence his conscience? "Jaime said she would have never given up, never retreated, never admitted defeat. And nobody knew our sister better than Jaime. Cersei left you no other choice than to attack. If you hadn't, she would have done worse. She would have pulled everybody down with her."

"Thank you for telling me."

Tyrion nodded. "And I did the right thing in stopping Varys, because it was the only way to stop him. And even though it was the right thing, I still feel guilty about it. He was my friend. He saved my life. And I got him killed."

"I warned him what would happen if he betrayed me."

"He followed his conscience and I followed mine," Tyrion said with sorrow.

Daenerys just nodded. There were no words to ease Tyrion's pain. She knew from experience. They all had to live with what had happened, each in their own way.

"Well, enough of this gloomy talk," Tyrion said in a more cheerful tone. "We have to look forward. It could have been a lot worse. We could have all ended up as scarecrows with blue eyes. But we are still alive. And I am more than glad that we are still alive. And I am glad that Ser Jorah is here." It was his way of apologizing for accusing Jorah of taking advantage of her.

"So am I. Even though he has to leave again. And this time I don't have the heart to send him away."

Tyrion looked at her. She met his eyes and thus confirmed that it hadn't been a slip of the tongue. She had made Jorah go.


Daenerys knocked on Jorah's door. She had waited for him in her quarters. Dinner had been served a while ago. When the food had turned cold, she had become worried. Jorah hardly ever missed a chance to make sure she ate something.

"Come in," Jorah said. He was sitting in front of the fire, staring into it. He didn't even look up when Daenerys entered.

"Is everything alright?"

He just nodded and raised his hand. In it was a small scroll.

Daenerys closed the door and walked towards him. "News from Bear Island." It wasn't even a question.

Jorah continued to hold up the paper. "You can read it."

"Just tell me." His face gave nothing away.

"It's a boy, a healthy boy. They are both fine."

Daenerys sighed with relief, as if she had been holding her breath since the day she had sent him away. "Congratulations. I'm very happy for you." She truly was. Bear Island had a future now. House Mormont had an heir. At least it hadn't been for nothing. She sank into the chair opposite him. So much could have gone wrong during the pregnancy or during birth, as she had painfully experienced herself. "I'm glad, Jorah. Really glad."

"So am I." And Jorah was also grateful to be able to share this moment with someone, with her. "I still can't believe it. It seems unreal."

Daenerys got up and walked over to him, taking his hand between hers. "I am sure he's a beautiful boy. And he will grow up to be strong and brave, just like his father."

He squeezed her hands. "Thank you." Jorah wished that his father had lived to see this day.

"When will you leave? Tomorrow?"

They had both known that the arrival of his child would mean the end of their time together.

"If it is alright with you, I don't want to leave in quite such a hurry as last time," Jorah said.

"Of course."

"One more day won't make a difference." But it would make all the difference for them. One day to say goodbye.

"Will you have dinner with me?"

"Dinner?" He had completely forgotten that he had been supposed to eat with her. When the message had arrived, time had seemed to stand still. Too many things were going through his mind. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright." Daenerys observed him closely. "If you would rather be alone-"

"No, I don't." He would have enough time to himself during his journey north.

She turned to walk towards the door, but Jorah grabbed her hand and stopped her.

"Daenerys." He gently tugged on her hand until she faced him again. "I-"

"You don't have to say anything," Daenerys interrupted him. "You belong on Bear Island."

He nodded. But his heart belonged with her.


Jorah was looking for Grey Worm. Eventually, he found him in the armory, giving instructions to the Unsullied. Jorah patiently waited until they were done and everyone else had left.

"I will return to Bear Island tomorrow," Jorah said. "Please keep an eye on her."

"You should not have left."

"I know." If Jorah had known back then what he knew now, he wouldn't have left her. He would have risked being dragged off Dragonstone, being thrown into the ocean or whatever Daenerys had been prepared to do back then to make him leave.

"You love the Queen, do you not?"

"Yes."

"Then stay." After having lost Missandei, Grey Worm couldn't understand why Jorah would give this up voluntarily. He wasn't sure if the Queen had similar feelings for Ser Jorah, but she had changed considerably since he had come to Casterly Rock. She had been much happier. And of course Grey Worm was aware that Jorah had not been sleeping in his own quarters while at Casterly Rock.

"I won't punish my family for decisions Daenerys and I made."

"You swore an oath."

"Yes. But I also have a duty to my House."

"Your House has an heir now," Grey Worm said.

"Whatever I do, it's the wrong decision. Please, just watch over her, Torgo Nudho."

"It is not necessary to tell me. I will protect her like I have since the beginning."

"I know," Jorah replied. He had to admit that he was only here because he was trying to make himself feel better. "I know you will."


In celebration of the birth of the heir of House Mormont, a big feast was given at Casterly Rock.

"This wasn't necessary," Jorah said. "I don't care about these things." All the attention was making him slightly uncomfortable. And it was their last evening together.

"It was Tyrion's idea," Daenerys replied. "He couldn't be deterred."

"Of course." Jorah should have known.

"He says we need to throw more feasts and parties."

"Next on his list: He will reopen the fighting pits."

"Tyrion hated them. But I'm sure he'll come up with something else."

Jorah was glad to notice that there was a considerable change in the way Daenerys and Tyrion interacted. But he also wondered what Tyrion would be up to next, now that any restraint seemed to be gone.

"At least try to look a little more pleased as the guest of honor," Daenerys teased him.

Jorah's expression didn't change one bit.

"Did Tyrion say something to you? Did he insult you again?" Tyrion was in a particularly mischievous mood tonight. And slightly drunk already.

"No."

"Then what is bothering you?" Daenerys asked with concern.

"As the guest of honor, I won't be able to leave until very late," Jorah said softly so they wouldn't be overheard.

Daenerys smiled at him and squeezed his arm reassuringly. "Don't worry. Give them a bit more time and nobody will be sober enough to remember much of tonight."


Daenerys excused herself early from the feast. Jorah only stayed a little bit longer, citing his early departure the next morning as a reason.

When Jorah entered her quarters, Daenerys was sitting in front of the fire. She was wearing her night robe and her hair was loose. She looked stunning. It reminded him of days long past. The only difference was her face. It had lost all innocence. But she looked more beautiful than ever.

As soon as Daenerys heard the door open, her body relaxed a little bit. It felt like she had been waiting for ages. She stood up and walked towards Jorah. She had been anxious, for no real reason. And now that he was here, joy and sadness were battling for dominance. Daenerys tried to appear cheerful, but she couldn't quite hide her inner turmoil.

Jorah swore to himself that he would make her forget all her worries. "There's just you and me tonight."

Daenerys reprimanded herself. She had to pull herself together. She didn't want to give Jorah the impression that she was ungrateful. He didn't have to be here at all, especially not after she had sent him away. He didn't have to stay this long. She was grateful for every single day he had been with her. "Thank you, Jorah. You saved me. You truly did. I don't think I could have gone on like this-"

"You would have."

"I don't think so. You gave me the strength I needed to carry on, to get through it. You always have. When I despaired in the past, you were always there to catch me. To save me. Always."

"And I always will. If you let me. Because I love-"

Daenerys covered his lips with her fingers. "Don't say it."

"Why not?" He had said it several times by now and she had never objected to him declaring his love for her.

"You shouldn't."

Jorah couldn't help but grin.

"What is so funny?"

"Not saying it doesn't make it any less true," Jorah said.

Indeed, Daenerys thought. Not saying it didn't mean she wasn't in love with him. But she couldn't tell him. They had crossed too many lines already. This one she couldn't cross. As long as their declaration of love was one-sided, she might save them both some face. Daenerys wanted to uphold the appearance that this wasn't anything serious, that it was just friendship and physical intimacy, but not love. Besides, admitting her innermost feelings would be pointless. It wouldn't change anything and therefore she didn't want to burden Jorah with this knowledge.

"But I do like saying it," Jorah admitted. "You don't mind, do you?" he asked. Daenerys had never once voiced any displeasure at him saying it. When she had banished him, Daenerys had told him to never use her name again. She had told him to never touch her again. But she had never prohibited him from expressing his true feelings for her, not even in Meereen.

"No, I don't." Daenerys reached out to caress his cheek. Her hand was trembling slightly.

Jorah gently took her hand and placed a kiss on the inside of her wrist. "What's wrong?" he asked.

Daenerys laughed with embarrassment, surprised at herself at what she was about to admit. "I'm… nervous."

That was the last thing Jorah would have expected. "Why?"

"I want tonight to be perfect." She wanted it to be like their first night together.

"Tell me what you want."

"I don't want for it to end." But she knew that was impossible. "Slow. Like our night on Dragonstone. That was…"

Jorah held his breath. For the most part, he knew from her reactions that she had enjoyed their night together. But some doubts had always remained due to the fact that Daenerys had made him leave right afterwards.

"That night was perfect."

Jorah smiled at her. "It was. It was a wonderful night."

Daenerys nodded. "I have thought back to that night many times."

"So have I." Jorah looked at her with a serious expression. "Sometimes I wondered though if I had just dreamed it."

"Oh, Jorah…"

"Only for a very short moment." He reached out to stroke her cheek. "It was too good to just be a dream." Jorah tilted up her chin and brushed his thumb across her lips. "And so will this be."


It had been quite late when they had finally fallen asleep. When the first rays of light appeared, Jorah tried to get up without waking her, but didn't succeed. Their eyes met but neither said anything.

Jorah dressed wordlessly, while Daenerys was watching him.

When he was done, he sat down on the bed, took her hand and kissed it. "I don't know when, but I will come back."

"No. You can't."

"I can't stay away from you." He knew his limitations very well by now. "I cannot accept that this will be the last time I see you. The thought is unbearable to me."

"But… you shouldn't," Daenerys said, but her voice lacked any conviction.

"I swore to protect you, to never abandon you. I feel like I am abandoning you again."

"You saved me. And not for the first time." She stroked his cheek. "Not once have you abandoned me."

Jorah's heart was heavy. He felt worse than last time. Last time she had made him leave. This time he felt it was his own decision. But he couldn't stay.

"There is someone now who needs you more than I do. A lot more."

"But I also have a duty to my Queen."

Daenerys smiled sadly. "I am not your Queen anymore. I am Queen of the Six Kingdoms. The North isn't part of that anymore," she pointed out.

"Zhey qoy Qoyi."

"Blood of my blood."

"Maybe you are not my Queen anymore, but you will always be my Khaleesi. And the woman I love. Nothing will ever change that."

"And there is nothing that means more to me than your love."

Jorah kissed her passionately. Maybe he was a bit too forceful, too desperate, but Daenerys didn't seem to mind. Her arms went around his back, pulling him closer, if that was even possible. Jorah didn't want this to end. He didn't want to move. He wanted to feel her close like this for the rest of his life. Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined that they would ever be this close, and not just physically. And now he had to give it all up again. Life was a cruel joke. Teasing him. Testing him. Punishing him. With all the strength he had left, Jorah broke away from her lips. Not wanting to lose the connection all at once he rested his forehead against hers. He took a very deep breath, hoping it would help him focus again. It didn't. He felt Daenerys' hand against his face.

"It's alright," she whispered.

Jorah pulled back and looked into her eyes. That did help him focus. "Will you be alright?"

"Yes." Of course she would prefer to do this with Jorah by her side. But this wasn't an option any longer.

He looked at her with doubt.

"Truly, Jorah. I will be okay."

"Let Tyrion help you. It's his job to make yours easier."

She nodded. "I will become the Queen you always saw in me."

"You are that Queen. And you are so much more than that. You are an amazing woman. I love you. I will always love you."

They looked at each other for a very long moment. There was nothing more to say.


Notes:

They will see each other again. I promise.

Chapter 12 will start on Bear Island. And there will be some old acquaintances that haven't appeared in this story for a while as well as some characters that have not appeared before at all.