Hey everybody,
I hope you had a great start into the new week ;-)
We're back on schedule and I present you hereby the new chapter, thank you for your kind words and see you friday^^
Chapter 29 - Pride
-Zoro-
Finally!
He had spent almost two weeks with the damn sponge. Two weeks in which Mihawk had barely taught him anything, because Zoro had not been able yet to coat this stupid sponge while controlling his Haki flow. He looked at the little black sponge in his hands with great satisfaction before putting it in his pocket. At last he understood what it was all about, finally he could perceive the Haki flow.
It was still early in the morning and he had just returned from his usual morning laps. By now, he no longer had to worry about the Humandrills; even if he was in the depths of the forest, he could not perceive any of them and although there were certainly more important things, it somehow satisfied him.
Stretching he walked through the door from the backyard to the kitchen, where he found Perona. To his surprise, she was cooking coffee and scrambled eggs.
"Is Mihawk already up?" He greeted her roughly and walked past her to the faucet and tapped a glass.
"Mhm,"she nodded approvingly. "But in a bad mood, not that this would be anything new."
He did not respond but emptied his glass in one go. On the way to the door, he gave her a telling look.
"No," she lamented with her arms crossed, "I don't want to."
During the last few days, Perona had repeatedly forced him to talk, because she desperately wanted the Shichibukai to at least accept her.
Zoro shrugged. "Your decision. But I can now coat the sponge. That means we will continue with actually training today. If you don't ask him now, you won't get another chance."
He walked out.
In the end, what she did, didn't matter to him, but unlike Mihawk, Zoro thought it was unfair to not even give her a chance. He understood the view of the Shichibukai and yet, if Zoro would have follwed that principle, he would have already lost one or another person dear to him.
"Hey," Zoro greeted as he walked into the fireplace room, where the elder was already sitting at the grand table, reading a letter or something. Mihawk lowered his hand with the document and regarded Zoro with raised eyebrows once from top to bottom.
Clearly, he disliked something. Zoro wasn't sure what the other didn't like, either that he just came in unwashed or that he wasn't Perona with coffee and breakfast.
"Good morning," Mihawk finally answered after a slightly too long second, dropping his gaze back on the paper in his hand.
Zoro couldn't stop a grin as he pulled the sponge out of his pocket, coated it, and then threw it at the other. To his disappointment, however, Mihawk caught the small cannon without even blinking.
"So, you made it," he said, as the sponge in his hand slowly lost its dark color, "you can now control your Haki flow."
Zoro just nodded and folded his arms. He waited for his teacher's judgment, who now examined him again, this time a little more attentively. He could only guess what exactly the other was weighing up, but not for a second, he turned his gaze away when these yellow eyes looked at him.
Slowly, the elder stroked his beard, as if he were thinking hard, a picture that Zoro did not see so often. Yes, Mihawk pondered often, more often than he had ever seen a human think, but almost never did he look as if he had to rack his brain over something, as if his thought processes were too difficult even for him.
"All right," the Shichibukai finally said, but more to himself than to Zoro, and nodded. "Go, take a shower. Then we will start."
"With what?"
He had noticed how the other's gaze had changed; had noticed how the other's jaw had become a little tense; had noticed how he had cramped his shoulders for a fraction of a second. Zoro knew the other was stressed. For a second, he had believed that Mihawk would finally teach him the art of swords, but no, he knew what was on the agenda today.
"You want me to learn to control it."
The other only nodded, the shadow of a smile on his narrow lips. Zoro, however, didn't find it amusing. The only good thing about the last two weeks had been that he hadn't met his monster once.
"Why?" He asked, even though he knew the answer. "I now know how to prevent it. So we should..."
"Roronoa." The elder got up and Zoro gritted his teeth. "Take a shower."
This time he followed the demand, knew when it was wiser to postpone the discussion until later.
It was weird, he didn't need praise, he didn't need a pat on the back. He knew that this exercise had only been a means to an end, but nevertheless he was not entirely satisfied.
He had already talked with Mihawk a thousand times about mastering the basics before they would begin the right sword fight, and of course, as he was now, he posed a danger, not only to his enemies, but also to his friends. Apparently his demon wasn't a danger to Hawk Eyes, maybe Luffy would be able to stop him, Robin and the cook could resist him, but what about Chopper, Usopp, Nami?
Of course, he couldn't just ignore it.
He thought of Thriller Bark, he thought of his fight against Homura, he thought of the G-6. Each time, none of his friends had been harmed in the long run, but in less than two years they wanted to travel the New World, to visit dangerous realms. As long as Zoro couldn't control his deepest monster, he as well was a danger to them. He also knew what Mihawk had already explained to him; even this monster could one day become an advantage for him.
But he was still a long way from that.
As he passed the mirror, he regarded his reflection. Much had not changed; except for the slightly longer hair - which Perona regularly trimmed for him - and the small cross chain showed nothing of the last months. For a second, he wondered if he had really changed as much as he sometimes thought. Shaking his head, he left the bathroom and dressed. He should leave such doubts to someone who cared.
Next to the entrance, as always, Mihawk awaited him and, to his astonishment, Perona as well. She looked different than usual, although he could not say exactly why.
"Are you ready?" Mihawk asked him, without even expecting an answer.
"Are you coming along?" Zoro asked the ghost girl. She hadn't accompanied them for a long time and Zoro had been glad about that. "It could be dangerous."
"I don't care," she replied.
"Suit yourself," Mihawk said cold, "but rest assured that I will not take care of your well-being."
She was wearing trousers! That was it.
Zoro followed the Shichibukai, who simply ignored the outstretched tongue of the ghost girl and walked out. As always, their short march let them to the ruins and, as always, the Humandrills left them absolutely undisturbed, no wonder, the lord of the island was present.
For a moment, none of them said anything. Perona looked around insecurely and swung her arms back and forth as if she wanted to take off.
Zoro, on the other hand, had a hard time to move at all. He didn't want to lose control again, to wake up without being able to feel his body, without knowing what had happened in the last few hours. He didn't want to put Perona or even Mihawk in danger just because he had lost control, he didn't want to open his eyes with the uncertainty that they could all be dead. He didn't want to...
"You are scared." Mihawk stood in front of him with his arms crossed. Zoro did not respond. "I can imagine that this mania is probably not a pleasant feeling."
"Tze", it escaped Zoro. Nice how the other put it. Not a pleasant feeling, exactly.
"Do you have a plan at all how I can control it?" He replied roughly.
Now Mihawk stuck up his nose. "What? Do you really doubt my abilities?"
Zoro had a fitting comment on his lips, but Perona was faster, groaning loudly.
"And that's what you call training?" She complained, her hands crossed behind her head. "All you do is stare at each other and talk, that can..."
"Silence or I will behead you." The Shichibukai didn't even look at her. "Roronoa, we will continue with the bamboo lesson today."
His tone did not change for a second, remained matter-of-factly and unimpressed.
"Now that you are finally able to control your Haki flow, it should be easy for you to coat the bamboo and strengthen your armor without it getting thicker."
Zoro nodded. At least that sounded doable. Then he followed the other to the small pile of bamboo sticks that were still there from their last exercise.
"Now, Roronoa, show me your hardening."
He took one of the sticks and obeyed. This time he managed to completely coat the stick, without breaking it.
"Very good," the other praised unimpressed.
"And what now?" Zoro muttered, looking at the elder. "How can this help me not to go berserk?"
Mihawk almost laughed.
"Not at all," he said, shaking his head. "Please be aware that you have just mastered the basics of hardening, regardless of your madness. With a little practice, you will soon be able to harden your swords without running the risk of bursting them."
Surprised, Zoro looked at the black stick in his hand.
Mihawk was right. How could he have missed this? He was just applying the Busoshoku Haki. Never again would he have to worry about one of his swords suffering, now he could protect them.
"So as long as you are the one with the bigger reserves, you can use your Haki without having to worry. We have already found out that the mere absorption of foreign Haki does not affect your control as long as your energy storage is not too exhausted."
"And?"
Now he looked at the other again. Yes, they had already talked about this several times in the last few days.
The elder smiled slightly and shook his head.
"And that means we are going to find out today where your limit is. When does your madness overwhelm you? When do you lose control? The more we know, the less threatening your condition is."
He didn't like it, not at all. But he couldn't deny that the other was probably right. If he knew how long he could fight without going crazy, he could also contain the danger he posed to his friends.
However, he knew that the other's goal was for him to be able to control his monster completely. How this was supposed to happen, well, even the Shichibukai left that unanswered.
"That means I have to use my Haki first?" Zoro asked. "And how?"
The other's grin grew a bit and he lifted up another bamboo tube. Within less than a blink, the stick turned completely black.
"Attack me."
Zoro could hardly believe it.
"I will block every one of your attacks. Pay attention that your staff does not break." The other raised an index finger. "Do only absorb my Haki if I tell you to? If you start too early, we will probably never reach the critical area."
Why did this order sound so strange?
Critically, Zoro tilted his head, but then he understood.
"You can't control it," he muttered, almost astonished.
Of course, Mihawk himself had admitted having never heard of the ability to absorb Haki. He might be superior to Zoro in everything, but the only thing he could do to prevent Zoro from absorbing his Haki was not to apply any himself. In fact, Zoro had something ahead of the Shichibukai that the other probably could never learn himself.
"Have you noticed it just now?" The other asked him with a raised eyebrow. "But do not dare to believe that this makes us even."
Mihawk was still grinning.
"You may have a skill that gives you an advantage in combat, but you should not underestimate me. My Haki reserves are far larger than what you can currently absorb or endure. You also forget that I as well have a big advantage."
Surprised, Zoro did the same as the other and went into combat position.
"Roronoa, I am the one who trains you. I know all your skills, all your weaknesses. Nobody knows your fighting style or technique as well as I do, and I explored your gift of absorbing Haki before you even realized it." The other's grin grew a little bit. "You are truly unique in terms of your talent and ambition, my dear Roronoa. But you are not even close to my level."
There he was again, not the Shichibukai Hawk Eyes, not the honorable son of the house of Dracule, not the cool strategist Mihawk, no, the man who faced him was the best swordsman in the world Dracule Hawk Eyes Mihawk.
Zoro couldn't hide a grin either. That's where he wanted to go, and if this was the only way to throw this almighty bastard off his throne, then so it should be.
"You're pretty arrogant," he scoffed, grabbing his bamboo tighter. It may not be a real fight, not a sword in his hand, but it was not a sponge, at least not a theoretical lesson.
"Well, at least concerning that we are almost on a par."
Zoro attacked.
For hours, this exercise should occupy them. Every now and then the bamboo pipe in Zoro's hands broke, either because he let too much Haki flow into the dead plant or because his armor broke under the resistance of the Shichibukai, who used each single time to remind Zoro that Mihawk's armor was countless times weaker than what he would normally use in a true battle.
Yes, his teacher seemed to enjoy mocking and annoying him. But Zoro didn't mind. He was much more likely to deal with this than with lofty discussions and thoughts. How he had missed it. He had dealt and argued with the cook almost on daily basis, had fought with him and had vented his frustrations on him, as the blond had done on him.
With the Shichibukai it was different, he preferred the cold thought process, the rational analysis of motives and having not much of a choice Zoro had engaged in it. It was necessary that he trained not only his body, but also his mind, which he had understood by now and if he was quite honest, he did not find it so awful.
But of course, it was nothing compared to this here. Even with stupid bamboo, even with the stupid mocking of the Shichibukai, this was exactly what he wanted. He wanted to fight, only here he was really in his element and how he had missed it. He had almost forgotten how good it felt.
But the fight was far from good. It was exhausting and nerve-wracking, not because it was so thrilling, but because Zoro knew what the goal of this exercise was. Each hit only served to consume his Haki, to exhaust his reserves, only to find out when he would lose control.
He knew he would reach that point sooner or later, only in this way he could overcome his weakness. But over time, his bamboo tubes broke down at ever shorter intervals, not because he let too much Haki flow into the plant fibers, but because his armor was weakening.
"Concentrate, Roronoa," the elder scolded him, "do not think I would not notice when you hold back. Your Haki is not so weak that it would not hold such a weak armor."
The grin of the morning was long gone. The Shichibukai had followed his word and blocked every single blow from Zoro so far seemingly without any problems. Not once had he changed his foot position and hardly a drop of sweat ran down his forehead, while Zoro felt like he had jumped into a hot spring with his clothes on.
The shadows that grew longer in the fog were proof enough that the day was coming to an end, meanwhile a light drizzle had set in, but Mihawk did not stop the exercise.
"It should not take that long, Roronoa," he gnarled as daylight eased around them and dawn set in, while Zoro threw away another broken stick and grabbed another one. "Your hardening is too weak; it takes too long to consume your Haki. Stop holding back."
"I'm not holding back," he growled with heavy breaths. It was possible that his reserves of Haki had not reached their limit yet, but hours of attacking a wall of steel-hard muscles wasn't necessarily fun either. How could the other accuse him of not giving everything?
He was here to surpass the other, and to do so he had to defeat his greatest weakness, the uncontrollable monster within him, so why did the other accuse him of not doing everything in his power?
"Then show it to me!" The elder ordered.
At some point, Perona withdrew back to the castle, but Zoro didn't waste any thought on why she had come along in the first place.
He could see the Shichibukai becoming more dissatisfied with every second. The corners of his mouth sank deeper and deeper and the usual wrinkles on his forehead grew. No matter what attack Zoro carried out, the other was unimpressed and more and more pipes broke, while the Shichibukai had not yet allowed a single scratch on his bamboo.
"Roronoa!" Out of nowhere, the other suddenly took a step forward and attacked him.
At the last moment Zoro was able to deflect the blow, but his bamboo broke and Hawk Eyes' coated stick hit him against the face the full nine yards. Gasping for air, he stumbled back and fell.
"Pathetic." Mihawk towered over him. "Tze, neither your bamboo should have broken, nor was this attack strong enough to really trouble you. Still, you crawl on the floor."
Zoro rubbed his jaw and spit blood on the bare earth.
"If you do not take this seriously, Roronoa, we can stop now. This is a waste of time."
How dare you?!
For the first time in weeks, their training finally came close to a fight, not just stubborn, simplistic, stupid concentration on bamboo sticks or sponges, not just bland theory stuff and now this snob accused him of not making an effort? That he wasn't serious? He actually accused Zoro of wasting his time! Put him on a par with Perona and paperwork.
"Wanna say that again!" He grumbled, rising painfully. "You have no idea what I'm trying to do here, you bastard."
The Shichibukai was unimpressed.
"Oh, really? To me it looks like you are trying to delay the inevitable. You use as little Haki as possible, keep pinching off from me every now and then, hoping that I will not notice, and your attacks get weaker with every blow. You disappoint me."
"Shut up, you..."
"For a second I even thought that you would now pose a danger to Jiroushin, but if you are not even ready to deal with yourself, how will you ever be prepared to fight me?"
That hurt!
"As long as you are not ready to overcome yourself and face what scares you, we do not need to continue our training. You have already successfully suppressed it for 20 years, so carry on with this, if it makes you feel..."
"Stop it!"
He had grabbed the other's bamboo and ripped it out of his hand, knowing that the other had allowed it. He was standing in front of Hawk Eyes, breathing heavily. He wanted to say something, wanted to justify himself, to put the other in his place, but no word came out of his mouth. Several times he swallowed and tried to calm his breath.
Unimpressed, the elder withstood his gaze. He didn't seem angry at all, despite his harsh words, despite his attack.
"If I'm such a disappointment," Zoro finally said, "why are you so calm?"
Mihawk did not respond.
"You care about training with me, said yourself that I am important to you. If I really disappoint you, if you would really doubt that I can become the swordsman who will defeat you, why the hell doesn't it make you angry?"
And then Zoro got it.
"You want to provoke me," he muttered in wonder. "You want me to get angry and attack you without thinking."
It made click.
"You think I'm going to let my hair down like that."
A barely visible smile crept over the elder's lips.
"But it seems like you saw through my subtle manipulation. Bravo."
Mihawk had played with him, had used this moment to test Zoro's character, to check if he could keep his emotions in check, to check if he had really changed. The heated feeling in his chest faded slightly and he took a deep breath.
"However, my words were not made up, Roronoa. You really let yourself be inhibited by your fear. Whether consciously or unconsciously, you are trying to prevent your Haki reserves from sinking into a fragile area so you would not run the risk of losing control."
It sounded as cool as ever; Zoro had no idea whether Mihawk was angry or even disappointed.
"In a real fight, that would not be a bad idea with your current skills. But here and now we want to do just that so that you can deal with it in a safe environment. As long as you are not ready to take the next step, I cannot help you."
This almost hurt even more than what the other had said before to provoke him.
"And what now?" Zoro asked, staring at the ground.
"Now we stop for today."
Zoro's gaze chased upwards.
"But...!"
"Did you listen to me for even a second?" Now the other sounded irritated. A little harder than before, Mihawk continued: "I want you to use tonight to think about this training and, if it is necessary, tomorrow as well. As long as you may need to find out what you want to achieve and how far you are ready to go."
These words sounded very threatening.
"I can train you, Roronoa, eliminate your weaknesses and perfect your strengths, train your skills and optimize your gifts. I can teach you lacking knowledge and accompany you on your way to become a true master of the sword. But there is one thing I cannot do." The elder still looked at him cold. "I cannot go the way for you. You have to decide, you have to face your fears. I know that you are disciplined and persistent. You are afraid of a few things, so it is all the harder for you if they stand in your way."
Zoro bit his lower lip and lowered his gaze again.
"Think about it calmly and then tell me your decision. If you are ready to face your fears, I will continue to train you. What you do until then is your decision."
He swallowed heavily. The other didn't say it, but it was very clear that they were at a cutting point here and Zoro didn't even know how they had gotten there. It would depend on Zoro's decision whether the other would continue to train him, and even if he could now simply say that he would not let himself be subdued by his fears, that he had no idea what the other was saying, he also knew that it was true.
He hadn't given everything. He had just sabotaged himself to not get into a situation that he wanted to avoid.
Tze, that didn't fit him at all. He was ashamed.
"And something else." Zoro looked up, the other seemed even more dissatisfied than ever.
"I noticed that you only do your individual training sessions in this form." Zoro gritted his teeth. "Do you even care about the growing gap between your two bodies?"
The yellow eyes lay coolly on him and were probably waiting for an answer.
"No, I..."
"If you decide to continue this path, you will only train as Loreen from now on, unless you train with me and I tell you something else."
He looked away.
"Do you have a problem with that?"
Of course, he had. Finally, he had his body under control again, could now keep his real shape for more than 24 hours, could finally start the actual training and now Hawk Eyes wanted to ban just that? Especially after the other had just accused him of not taking the training seriously and throwing their training at risk.
"You still do not understand it, do you?" Disappointed, the elder shook his head. It seemed as if he was simply done with the previous theme about using Haki and addressed now another topic. "None of your opponents will wait patiently, until you can turn back into this shape here, to defeat you. Real life is not a duel. It is not about honor and pride, not about skills and elegance. It is all about survival."
As if Zoro didn't know that.
"Roronoa, what is your biggest weakness?"
That question surprised him. He shrugged his shoulders.
"Apart from all the things we just covered?" He replied sarcastically, but knew the other was expecting a serious answer. "Well, I'm still pretty slow compared to... "
"False!" The elder interrupted him hard and took a step towards him. "Maybe you do not notice your development because you do not fight here every day like usually, but what I just said I actually believe; I think you could soon surpass Jiroushin."
It was like a lightning bolt hit him.
"So no, your technique is not perfect yet, but your biggest weakness is clearly your pride."
Now Zoro stared on the floor and clenched his jaw.
"Otherwise you would have long since admitted that you have to get much better as Loreen. If you carry on like this, your other form will become your Achilles heel." The other folded his arms. "You are so afraid of your inner demon that you simply ignore your true weakness. Your monster won't kill you, I can make sure of that, but only you can defeat your pride."
With that, Mihawk turned around and disappeared into the darkness, leaving Zoro behind, furiously clenching his fists.
"Bastard!" He growled into the silence, knowing full well that the other was right.
