When they finally arrived home, after two hours of silence, Jenny hung up Vastra's cloak and then immediately went upstairs. Vastra followed her to the bathroom.
"Do you need help?" Vastra offered cautiously, sensing a tension from Jenny.
"No." Jenny shook her head as she took off her waistcoat, sighing at the rends in it before throwing it onto the chair, swiftly followed by the rest of her clothes. Vastra's eyes widened out the deep gouges in Jenny's back. "You gonna watch an' all?"
Realising she was going to get no further detail from Jenny at the present moment, Vastra silently gathered up the pile of abandoned clothes and left to soak them.
Vastra didn't like being closed off from Jenny. She pondered making dinner but knew nothing of how to cook human food. And after her last disastrous attempt, causing Jenny more work was not exactly the way to cheer her up. She debated a pie from the nearby chophouse but didn't want to leave Jenny alone.
When she heard the bathroom door slam, she stepped quietly back upstairs. Jenny was sat on the bed, damp hair hanging loose, a towel loosely wrapped around her. She looked so melancholy Vastra almost keened in empathy. She tucked her head into the crook of Jenny's neck instead, in an attempt to comfort her. Vastra took it as a small victory that Jenny leant her head against Vastra's with a small sigh.
They stayed like that for a long time.
Jenny shivered suddenly and Vastra mentally rebuked herself for not making Jenny get dressed. She watched as Jenny moved away and dried herself off, frowning once more at the scores on Jenny's back.
"I told that girl not one scratch…" she muttered, already contemplating vengeance on the little Ratspeaker.
Jenny snorted. "Ha!" it came out strange and high pitched.
"How's your wrist?" Vastra inspected it after Jenny had pulled on a clean slip and drawers.
"S'fine."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Jenny sat back down on the bed, staring into the distance. Vastra sat on the bed behind Jenny and got on with brushing her hair, drawing it back into a loose plait.
"You should eat something. I could get a pie?" Vastra suggested as she heard Jenny's stomach give a small gurgle of discontent.
Jenny shook her head and shook herself out of her reverie, getting up and retrieving her corset, wincing as it tightened against her wounds.
Vastra was becoming concerned. "You should at least let me dress those."
Jenny answered by pulling a dress on and buttoning it up to the neck, proving once again her adeptness at nonverbal communication.
"Jenny!" Vastra pleaded, reaching out her hand as if to grasp Jenny's arm but Jenny brushed past her and sat down on the small vanity chair to pull on her boots. "You're going out again? Where…" Vastra bit off the question and merely watched from the landing as Jenny clattered down the stairs and out the front door.
Jenny knew she'd been dismissive and that Vastra would be worried but the Silurian wouldn't understand! And she didn't want pity right now, she wanted…family. Broken, split up, banished from, dead or gone, there was only one member she could go to.
Jess opened her front door at the curt knock, took one look at Jenny's face and let her in without a word. The room was as Spartan as ever. No badly crocheted rugs or tables overflowing with papers, no piles of books. Jess moved towards the fireplace as if to set a kettle boiling and then thought better of it. She reached under the bed and brought out a half empty bottle of gin, thrusting it into Jenny's hands.
"Valentine's day with Lizard Lady not work out?" Jess asked, forthright as ever, sprawling backwards onto the bed.
"You could say that." Jenny uncorked the gin bottle.
"You need to kip 'ere?" Jess patted the bed she was led on.
"No. Nuffin' like that."
"You bin in the wars again? Supernat'ral stuff?" Jess noticed the pained expression on Jenny's face as she sat down at the end of the bed.
"Yeah."
Jess frowned at her sister's reticence but left her cradling the bottle of gin whilst she went to get food.
Jenny coughed as she took a swig. It burned and made her eyes water and she replaced the cork and set it to one side. She couldn't get comfortable in the room, wandering about it aimlessly. There was nothing to pick up or fiddle with, no form of entertainment. Nothing to suggest a presence more than the battered suitcase. Jenny wondered what her sister did, the battles she was fighting. In the waning afternoon, she heard the sounds of London. People arguing, singing, glass smashing, animals, bustle. Did Jess feel as alone as Jenny did right now? Surrounded by the noise of life and alone in a shell of a room?
Jess returned with half a pie which she set in front of Jenny. "Enjoy. Spent good money on that. Now. What 'as caused you to turn up on my doorstep, for I've noticed you never visit without a purpose."
Jenny glowered at Jess. Her sister was hardly one to criticise Jenny's lack of sisterly socialising, having walked out on them. But her mouth was full of pie and by the time she'd managed to chew through it, the urge to bite back had gone, replaced by the need to tell the purpose of her visit.
"Would you believe me if I said I saw Albie?" Jenny asked.
"Albie? Thought you said 'e was taken." She eyed Jenny suspiciously.
"He was. Taken Below."
Jess shuddered involuntarily at the word. "The place wot that Hound came from?"
"The same."
"Is…he alive?" Jess's first macabre thought was that Jenny had seen his body.
"Very." Jenny bit into the quarter that remained of her half of the pie.
"Oh." Jess sat down beside her sister and opened the gin bottle she'd retrieved. "Is 'e comin' back?"
"No."
"Oh." Jess's voice was expressionless. She took a long gulp of gin. "That's nice of 'im. Bastard."
Jenny smiled, letting out a soft snort. Some of the tension drained from her as they fell into a more companionable silence. Jess didn't ask for any more details. Albie was alive and wasn't coming back. And Below was involved as well. She didn't need any more than that. For whatever explanation there was, it wouldn't change that.
"Why'd you leave?" Jenny asked all of a sudden.
Jess swore under her breath, having gotten lost in her own thoughts over Albie's disappearance. "Christ's sake. Why'd'yer think?"
"You din't want to get stuck with us." Jenny toyed with the leftover pie crust.
"An' what precise good would I have done yer if I had stuck with yer ey?" Jess shouted, blowing up in a sudden rage that surprised Jenny. "Wot? You like ter dream you wouldn't have ended up in the workhouse? On the streets? You tagged after Albie when you were bare able to walk, workin' for the gangs with 'im an' you loved it."
"I loved it?" Jenny leapt up, shoving her sister backwards. "I ended up in prison! I lived in fear of 'em when I got out and you think I loved it? I was starvin' on the streets, homeless…"
"What and you think if I'd stayed, set up a nice little house, you would've been a good little girl, gone to school? Not got into any trouble at all? Got a nice job on the street or as a skiv? Done what everyone told you? I mean cry alive Jenny e'en with a nice big house an' chance at comfortable livin' what do you do? Solve crimes with a bloody lizard woman, kill spectral hounds an' get into fights with whatever unreal article you fought this time. And you robbed a few bleedin' banks for the money ter pay for the 'ouse in the first place!"
Jenny opened her mouth but she had no comeback so she shut it again.
Jess sighed heavily, taking another pull of gin. "I 'ave no regrets. I bet Albie don't either, the rotter." She gave a small laugh then noticed Jenny's stricken face. "An' I imagine, once you've finished feelin' all…abandoned by the world, you won't either." Jess said, a littler kindlier. "Now sod off back to yer wife an' enjoy what's left of Valentine's day." She grabbed Jenny by the shoulder and pulled her across the room, shoving her out the door and slamming it behind her.
The thought occurred to Jenny, after she'd recovered from her abrupt exodus, that Jess was probably upset herself, in her own way, about Albie not coming back. Her sister had probably made peace with not seeing any of her family again, sacrificing them for whatever reason it was beyond not wishing to be stuck looking after children. But then Jenny had stumbled back into Jess's life and indeed only seemed to visit her when she was having troubles. And now Albie had reappeared but wasn't coming back.
The pull of family was strong for Jenny; it was why she'd visited her Uncle, why she'd rescued Cathy. Why she went to Jess when she was worried, having tracked her down. Why she was hurt that Albie had been distant, despite their closeness growing up. And she wondered briefly whether Jess, despite her cavalier attitude, felt that same pull.
Thoughts whirled in Jenny's head. She needed a drink. Not gin. She found the pub Jess had taken her to and sat down with a tankard, trying to ignore the stares of the other patrons at a lone maid drinking a pint to herself.
She thought on Albie, trying to focus her thoughts. He'd always been careless, casual, almost manipulative as a child, encouraging Jenny to help him out, although as Jess had pointed out, Jenny had done so willingly enough. Was it that much a surprise he'd only be interested in her help now, rather than being a brother? But the thought crept in too that he'd still sent Anagesic to watch over her; had been furious when Peggy had gotten her lost Below, even by accident.
And Jess. She didn't know a thing about Jess. Didn't know what she'd been through, or even what she did, any more than Jess had when Vastra had sprung her from jail. Jenny had been too young to be truly close to any of her siblings. And their death and disappearances had left holes. Albie clearly didn't want to come back. And Jess had shoved her out the door. A fresh wave of abandonment swept over Jenny and she felt the sting of the rejections by all her family.
"Yor me family now. You an' the urchins." The thought she had not dared voice to Vastra echoed in her mind. Vastra. Jenny had left her without a word, a worried and lost expression in her blue eyes. She stared at her tankard, wondering what on earth she was even doing here. Jess was right. Draining the last of the beer, she ran as fast as she dared over slush covered cobbles all the way back to Paternoster Row.
It seemed further than she remembered, and full of people getting in the way, muttering or shouting at her when she pushed through them, shoving her back when she slipped and fell into them. Jenny burst through the door, anxiously searching, unable to find her voice to call out but Vastra was suddenly there in front of her anyway, holding her steady by the arms as she caught her breath.
Vastra was surprised as Jenny flung her arms around Vastra's waist but held Jenny tightly anyway, a small, satisfied smile on her lips.
"'m sorry." Jenny muttered eventually, her voice muffled from her face being pressed against Vastra's dress. "S'meant to be Valentine's day."
"We don't seem to have much luck with holidays do we." Vastra grinned down at her. Jenny looked distraught. "Well they're only foolish ape traditions anyway." Vastra rolled her eyes mockingly.
It was enough to make Jenny snort with laughter, disentangling from Vastra to wipe her eyes.
"Have you eaten?" Vastra asked gently, brushing her fingers against Jenny's sleeve as Jenny moved past her into the living room, seeking the warmth of the fire to ward off the February chill she'd brought in with her from the streets.
"Yeah." Jenny nodded. The fire had burnt low and she knelt before it, picking up the poker to stoke it back to life.
"Then rest, my dear. Hmm?" Vastra laid a hand on her shoulder.
Jenny didn't move, screwing up her eyes as they filled with tears once more.
"I spent…so long. Wonderin' how they were all doin'. Whether they were alive. Thinkin' about what they'd think. 'specially him. An' he doesn't care. Not in a good way. He just…I mean, with Jess an' Cathy they were older, we weren't exactly close but me an' Albie…"
"You looked up to him, I take it. As a brother." Vastra shook the coal scuttle to check the amount in it.
"Yeah. We were always hangin' round together. He introduced me to the mudlarks, to the gangs…" Jenny trailed off. It wasn't exactly a shining description of someone to look up to.
Vastra looked faintly disgusted, peering down into the coal scuttle. "Well he sounds like an ideal brother."
"He looked after me." Jenny shrugged. "Wouldn't've survived long without knowing what 'e taught me. Would still be in the Industrial school. Wouldn't've dared do 'alf the things I 'ave."
"Such as robbing banks? You may have a point." Vastra conceded, glancing around the living room with its multitudinous shelves and plush sofa and chairs. Jenny's criminal past had led up to and had been instrumental in making their life as it was now, and their life now was exceeding comfortable in comparison to what it had been.
Jenny felt her mind settle. Jess had been right about that too. Now she'd stopped feeling sorry for herself, she didn't find much in her past to regret.
"What were your sisters like?" Jenny asked, relieving Vastra of the scuttle and shaking coal onto the fire.
The question caught Vastra off guard but she realised why Jenny was asking it. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, opened them, looked at Jenny. "They were older than me." She began hesitantly. "But we were of the same gene chain. I think they were tolerant of me, as the youngest. Perhaps jealous of the time our mother spent with me. But they were proud. When I became a Warrior. Walked with them. Fought with them. They were not all Warriors. Some were Scientists, like my father. Some were Poets. Although it is not like human poetry. Silurian poetry is…mathematical. The beauty of a spiral. Things like that."
"Did they hate apes too?"
"Apes were food to them." Vastra sighed wearily. "And humans slaughtered them all before they had a chance to know them as anything else." Jenny looked shamefaced. "I suppose they would be similarly appalled and disgusted at the propagation of apes across the planet, the same as I. They would struggle to understand that former prey had become the dominant species."
"Did you have friends?" Jenny changed tack away from Vastra's disgust at people.
"Yes." Vastra didn't volunteer any further information.
"Did you…" Jenny hesitated.
"No. I told you. A few brief forays, but nothing like this." Vastra darkened, anticipating the next question.
"Wot, not in two hundred years?"
Vastra stared at Jenny unblinking. A small quirk of the lips betrayed the fact that Jenny was teasing her. "Bed!" She glowered.
Jenny put the scuttle down and stood up.
"Will you stay with me?" The vulnerability was as abrupt as the teasing had been.
"For two hundred years?" Vastra asked, wending her arms around Jenny's waist, determined to get her own back.
"Don't think I'll live that long." Jenny laughed.
Vastra's face fell. Her heart thudded and her grip around Jenny tightened. Her teasing had backfired on her.
Jenny thoughts raced as the Silurian went still and quiet at the reality that had been spoken. They settled on the book she'd been reading, although she'd found it so humorous she'd ended up reading most of it aloud to Vastra. She remembered a line but couldn't recall it exactly. But she remembered the sentiment clear enough. She grinned, a little wickedly. "Welllll I s'pose you never know. Could well out live yer. If hawks or hounds don't get me any rate."
A glut of conflicting emotions twisted Vastra's face. Affront, worry, sheer disbelief and amazement at the ability to joke about death.
"Ha!" The emotions amalgamated into a scoff.
Jenny slumped into Vastra's embrace, a little exhausted now by all the emotions of the day.
"Bed." Vastra hummed and lifted Jenny into her arms.
"'ey!" Jenny protested.
"This is romantic, is it not? And it is Valentine's day." Vastra carried her all the way upstairs to their bedroom.
Jenny stood still in the middle of their room after Vastra set her down in order to retrieve her nightgown. Vastra turned to look at her and her heart tugged at the sight; Jenny looked so lonely all of a sudden.
She walked over to her, placing her fingers beneath Jenny's chin to lift it, sliding her fingers down Jenny's neck and beneath her collar until she found the slim piece of string she was looking for. She pulled it slowly until the flint at the end of it came into view, then, very deliberately raised it to her lips and kissed it gently. Tired appreciation of the gesture flooded Jenny's eyes but the young woman didn't move. Letting the Flint go, Vastra delicately began to undress her, with the same care she'd shown a ragged urchin a year and a day ago. She tenderly dressed the deep talon marks on Jenny's back, Jenny too tired to even flinch at the iodine. Vastra drew a nightgown over Jenny's head, the young woman falling into her, half asleep already in Vastra's arms as she picked her up and led her on the bed. Vastra swiftly changed into her own nightgown before drawing the covers over the both of them, curling up behind her, holding her tightly in her arms. She crooned an unfamiliar song in Jenny's ear, a soft lullaby in a strange language as Jenny fell fast asleep.
An: The quote Jenny is trying to remember is from Pride and Prejudice. "My dear, do not give way to such gloomy thoughts. Let us hope for better things. Let us flatter ourselves that I may be the survivor.'' Mr Bennet, Troll Dad Extraordinaire.
