Uff, it's getting late, but here I am, with another one of my favorite chapters (and those of you, who know me by now, can probably guess what that means for the character ;-P )

I hope you guys will enjoy and have a great week ;-)


Chapter 33 - Alcohol

-Zoro-

Yawning, he wandered through the forest, the luggage on his shoulder, far too much to be carried by such slender shoulders, but fortunately he became stronger even in his weak form.

He was a little surprised that no one had awaited him, but he didn't worry too much about it. Zoro was happy to have survived the last few days and was looking forward to continuing his training.

At last he had understood what Mihawk had meant when he had claimed that Zoro had not been fighting with full force. Zoro had finally understood that he was afraid of losing himself. It was just like when Zoro had awakened in this foreign body. The only thing he had always been able to rely on had been his own body, but then he had lost even that, his own body. Over time, Zoro had then realized that something much more important had remained with him, his will.

That's why he had hesitated, that's why he hadn't given everything, he was afraid of losing it, was still afraid of losing the only thing he hadn't lost so far. The damn Shichibukai was right, Zoro had held back because he was afraid.

But now he had decided that he was going to risk losing himself, he had to overcome himself and that's what he would do, after all, that was his only way to become the best swordsman in the world and nothing would stop him.

Expectantly he hurried along the narrow path, couldn't wait to tell Mihawk about it. The sun behind the fog was already deep above the horizon, so they probably wouldn't train today, but tomorrow; tomorrow, Zorro would learn to get stronger.

Arriving at the castle, Zoro simply left his luggage in the entrance hall, decided not to waste another thought about Eizen, Yaone, or the assembly, but only to look forward. Zoro would transform now, then eat something and plan the next few days with the Shichibukai. The drive for action had gripped him, finally he knew what he could do, finally he could...

"Finally, you're here!" Perona stormed in through the door from the kitchen. Zoro casually noticed that she was wearing the clothes she always put on when she acted as maid, but her pale face troubled him.

"What happened?" He grumbled.

"It's Dracule," she said, nervously biting her lower lip. "He's in his room."

Zoro raised an eyebrow but said nothing and made his way to Hawk Eyes' chambers. It was not uncommon for Perona and Mihawk to bicker with each other, in fact Zoro was no exception in such bickers, but usually Perona wasn't really upset about it in the long run.

Zoro's room was the first in the long hallway of the bedrooms, and he used it to transform and change before visiting the Shichibukai. Whatever was going on, Zoro felt more comfortable if he could deal with it in his true form.

Down the hallway, he was still pondering whether it would have been wise to have Perona give him a warning about what he would have to expect, but it was too late for that. Somehow, he had a very odd feeling.

He knocked against the heavy oak door.

"Leave!" Came it from the other side at the same time. "I told you to leave me alone, ghost girl!"

"It's me," Zoro grumbled, pushing down the handle.

"Oh," the elder replied in an unusually brittle voice, "you're back...? Leave me alone."

Slightly surprised but even more irritated, Zoro ignored this order and opened the door.

He was rarely in these rooms – and why should he, if this castle offered hundreds of rooms that did not interfere with the privacy of his teacher? - nevertheless, Zoro had a strange moment of déjà vu as he stepped in and smelled the familiar cool wooden scent mixed with alcohol and sweat.

In the plain, albeit high-quality, bedroom, it took him a moment to figure out where Mihawk was. He sat in the passageway to the dressing room, his back leaning against the door frame, one leg on the left and the other one the right side of the door frame stretched out along the wall. A trail of empty bottles paved his way around the bed, over to the dark dresser on which Yoru lay like an uninvolved spectator, past the small reading table, to the Shichibukai himself. In one hand, he held a half-empty bottle of golden liquid.

Oh yes, Zoro recalled a few months ago, when he had already once found his teacher drunk and hangoverish in his bedroom. Luckily, this time Mihawk was dressed in more than just a pair of underpants. The slightly glassy hawk eyes swung over to him and the Shichibukai waved off.

"Get lost, Roronoa. I don't want to talk to you now."

"Duh," Zoro replied tonelessly, closing the door behind him. "Geez, you look shitty."

The other did not respond but took another swig. Zoro sighed, he had no idea what had happened, but something must have happened that the Shichibukai had decided to get wasted.

"Oh man, you're so bothersome," Zoro grumbled, stumbling across the room. Directly opposite the older man, he dropped on the floor against the wall and crossed his arms behind the back of his head.

Mihawk followed his movements more or less attentively before his gaze came to rest on Zoro's right knee, which lay just inches from his bare foot. Zoro followed the elder's gaze and watched Mihawk nudging Zoro's leg with his big toe, as if to make sure Zoro was really there, not just an imagination.

"What do you want, Roronoa?" Now Mihawk looked up to him. "I don't want to talk to you."

"I don't care," Zoro replied, unimpressed, reaching for one of the bottles around him, unfortunately they were all empty.

"Pass some over," he said, reaching out to the elder with his empty hand.

Mihawk rolled his eyes theatrically and shook his head.

"Get lost, Roronoa, I'm not in the mood to deal with you."

"Did I ask for that?" Zoro asked with a raised eyebrow, "all I want is this bottle in your hand. Or a full one, if there's another one."

"Upstairs in the kitchen."

"I'm too far away."

"In the wine cellar."

"I don't think about getting up now just to get alcohol when there's a bottle of rum in front of me.'

"That's corn."

Now Zoro grinned broadly when the other actually handed him the bottle.

"High-percentage whisky, even better."

In one go, Zoro emptied the miserable rest and enjoyed the burning sensation. Oh, how long had it been? Oh yes, since the damn Shichibukai had forbidden him to drink any booze until he could control Haki.

"Roronoa, really?" Mihawk complained.

"Oh, drop the act, you've been drinking enough."

Zoro looked around for another bottle but found none.

"Don't you have any more?" He mumbled.

"As I said," murmured the other, "in the winecel..."

"In this room, I mean."

For a long time, the usually sharp eyes of his teacher looked at him.

"What do you want, Roronoa? Can't you leave me alone for this one evening? Tomorrow I will willingly deal with your problems again."

Huffing Zoro rose and simply climbed over the other into the dressing room.

"Roronoa!"

"Stop whining, that's pathetic. And you want to be the greatest swordsman in the world?"

Zoro didn't even turn to the other while he scanned one closet after another, pulling out clothes and throwing them to the ground carelessly. Somewhere he would find one of the booze hiding spots.

"How many times do I have to repeat myself," Mihawk sighed behind him, "even I am just an ordinary person, Roronoa."

"Wrong!" Triumphantly, Zoro turned around and pointed a found full bottle at the older one. "In the end, I want to defeat you, and what would that say about my dream if you were just an ordinary person?"

"Oh Roronoa, this is Single Malt Whisky."

"Don't worry, it will serve its purpose."

Zoro climbed back over the other and dropped again on the floor of the opposite wall. Hawk Eyes groaned quietly and rubbed a hand through his face.

"Do you really have to, Roronoa? Just go to your room or wherever and let me just be this evening. When it comes to your training..."

"What are you talking about...?"

"For all I care, we can move on tomorrow. Satisfied? If it is so important to you, leave me in peace tonight for once and I will continue to train you tomorrow; everyone is happy with that, okay? Then you can now..."

"Hey!"

With his eyes wide open, the Shichibukai stared at the empty bottles missing his face only by millimeters and shattering behind him against the wall.

Zoro ripped off the cap of the whiskey and took a deep sip.

"Don't you dare ever doing that again, understood?" He grumbled angrily, staring Mihawk down. "I don't care what your problem is, whether it's this stupid private meeting of you or Eizen or if you just wanted to get wasted."

Zoro took another sip.

"I don't care if you insult me, ignore me, or chase me to hell. I don't care if you're an arrogant asshole or think you're some average John Doe pirate." He placed the half-emptied bottle on the floor. "But if you don't take my training seriously, we'll get a problem, bastard!"

They stared at each other, but Zoro didn't even think about giving in.

"I don't care what happened, but a few days ago you didn't even know if you would continue to train me at all. So if you want to fob me off with this bullshit just to have a few hours of rest, then I don't want you to be my teacher anymore, understood?"

The hawk eyes grew big.

"I'm not here for playing games, Mihawk, and I won't sit here and let you fuck with me. So take my training seriously or let it be, get it?"

Zoro held the half-emptied bottle by the neck, ready to throw it at any time if necessary. This bastard made him crazy.

The other still looked at him with big eyes.

"What? Tongue swallowed or why can't you even give me a decent answer?"

Very slowly, the elder tilted his head to the side.

"You're truly incredible, Roronoa."

"Tell me something I don't know," he replied, offering the bottle to the other, but Mihawk refused only with a weak hand movement. Shrugging his shoulder, Zoro took another sip.

"So, you don't want me to resume training with you tomorrow."

"Of course I do," Zoro grumbled, rubbing his sleeve over his mouth, "but I want you to do it because you think it's the right thing to do, not so you have your peace for a few hours."

The Shichibukai looked at him expressionless. The alcohol apparently drove the redness in his face, but Zoro had to admit that he probably tolerated quite a lot when he had actually emptied all these bottles here on his own. However, the Shichibukai was far from being on a par with Zoro, at least not in this area.

For some time, they remained silent while Zoro gradually emptied the bottle and Mihawk regarded him and then let the view wander through the room again. Although the alcohol obviously played badly with him, his condition was not nearly as bad as the last time Zoro had found him drunk. He even seemed to be in a fairly clear state.

"So, is that all you have to say?" The elder finally asked.

"You didn't want to talk," Zoro said briefly. "And I just wanted to drink."

"Tze." Mihawk closed his eyes and leaned his head against the door frame. "Didn't we agree on you not drinking any alcohol until you can harden your swords?"

"Yes, if only my strict teacher were around to scold me for my misbehavior?"

The other looked disapprovingly at him from half-opened eyes.

"Are you making fun of me?"

Now Zoro grinned broadly. How could he not make fun of this image of the oh so big Hawk Eyes?

"You know I could kill you by snapping my fingers," the other muttered, and as if he wanted to demonstrate, he tried to snap, but failed miserably.

"Just try it," Zoro quipped into his bottle.

Unnerved, Mihawk muttered something under his breath, but Zoro didn't mind, if the other was upset, he only had to blame himself.

"You don't take me seriously?"

Smiling, he answered the elder's unsteady gaze.

"Right at this moment? No."

A vein of anger appeared on the forehead of the other. He suddenly seemed furious; who knew what his drunken brain had just made up?

"Why not? Why don't I intimidate you? Treat me like respect! Be afraid of me!"

"What's wrong with you?" Now it was up to Zoro to roll his eyes. "Why should I be afraid of you?" He lifted the bottle and for a moment looked at the miserable remnant that swam back and forth on the ground. "It's absolutely stupid to be scared of another person and I don't know why I should make an exception for you."

He emptied the bottle, but the next moment it was ripped out of his hand and Mihawk lifted him up by the collar until Zoro lost the ground under his feet, pressed him against the wall, and stared right through him.

"But you should be afraid of me!"

Before Zoro could do anything, the other hurled him to the ground. At the last moment he was able to catch himself, but Mihawk was already over him and pushed him against the cold stone.

"Do you forget who you are dealing with? I'm a Hawk Eyes! The only reason you're still alive is your goddamn, unnatural talent. Otherwise I would have killed you a long time ago!"

The Shichibukai crouched on top of him, kept his legs under control with his own and had both of his wrists pinned firmly against the hard ground with one hand. Zoro knew full well that Mihawk was superior to him; he knew full well that he could not free himself from this grip and oh how he hated it right now.

"Then do it."

The delicate hairstyle of the Shichibukai was destroyed and black strands hung in his face, partially hiding his stinging eyes, almost glowing in the dim light of the room.

Zoro had no idea what was going on with the other, but he hadn't been struggling with Eizen and other problems for five days just so that this guy would lose his mind now due to a nervous breakdown.

"I'm tired of you always threatening me with such a shit whenever it gets too much for you. I'm not afraid of you, because there's no reason for that. Just kill me if it makes you happy. Wouldn't be my first jump to the other side and back, you know?"

The other trembled, his whole body shivered. Perhaps Zoro had been wrong and the alcohol had been a bit too much for the well-educated wine drinker. Mihawk's face, on the other hand, was calm, the thin lips merely pressed together, the typical wrinkles no deeper than usual, if it weren't those eyes, those eyes that Zoro had never seen like this before.

"Well, Mihawk. Just do it." Zoro laughed softly. "But don't say I didn't warn you. If you kill me, who will one day defeat you and get your title?"

For a second, the other just stared down at him and then Zoro could see how it clicked.

"Fuck!" Zoro groaned, but it was already too late. The world turned too fast when Mihawk picked him up by his wrist like a doll and simply hurled him through the room.

Zoro crashed heavily against table and wall, stumbling between wood and stone to the ground. He was struggling for air, fighting for breath. Coughing, he tasted blood, dust and mortar falling down on him. So that's what it looked like when the other played rough.

"Why in heaven's name are you like this?!" The Shichibukai stood before him, hands clenched into fists, breathing at least as heavy as Zoro was. "Why do you always look at me like that? Why don't you turn your gaze away like everyone else? Why are you here at all? Why did you stay with me and not return to your friends? Why the hell aren't you afraid of me?"

"Those are a lot of questions at once," Zoro grumbled, coughing again.

But Mihawk continued his madness: "No matter what I do, no matter what I say, you don't seem to care. I could kill you, by mistake, in a moment of carelessness or in a moment of anger, fury, or just because you sometimes annoy me. I drag you into dangerous things, I place you at Nataku's, Eizen's, and the World Aristocrats' mercy and you don't care. I will mean your certain death, no matter what you do, no matter what your intentions are, and you still pretend that we both..."

"Get off your high horse." His voice still barely obeyed him, and his legs trembled, his whole body hurt, but Zoro certainly wouldn't join in the other, acting like a madman and just throwing him against the next best wall. "So, first of all, you being able to kill me is nothing special. Do you know how many times Luffy has accidentally almost bumped me off or Perona almost poisoned me with her cooking? Damn it, even a dedicated duck could kill me if it just tried it hard enough, and believe me, some tried. Besides, I've been dead before, so your threats are neither special nor somehow original."

He had no idea whether the other was listening to him at all, let alone understand him. Mihawk still stood over him like a looming tower.

"Second, tell me why the hell I should be afraid of you? You said it yourself, you're just an ordinary person, just like me. There is no reason for me to be afraid of another person. You can torture me, kill me, take away everything that is important to me, and yet I will never be afraid of you, after all, you are just some human being."

Clumsily Zoro got up, he could hear something cracking in his back, presumably he had broken one or two ribs, could have been worse.

"And thirdly..." Zoro, breathing heavily, straightened up in front of the other and approached him. He grabbed the Shichibukai by the shirt and pulled it down to him, so they were on eye-level. "You are not the one to decide about my death, and certainly not about my life. I don't care what you say or do and how much I should fear you. I make my own decisions, not you. I decided to be here, not you, and I decided to ask you for help, not you. I signed this contract with Eizen and I decided to go to this ball and these events, not you!"

He let go of the Shichibukai, who yet remained in that same position, as if he were unable to move.

"You are my teacher and that is why I trust your decisions. I trust you, but I do not obey you blindly like a some freaking dog; every single time I decide to follow your orders, just like I do every single day, every single second to follow my captain. So don't pretend that you have any say in my fate, because that's what I still decide on my own!" Once again Zoro wiped his sleeve over his mouth, but this time he saw drops of blood instead of alcohol, dyeing the dark green almost black, then he stared at the other again. "And if you don't get along with that, that's your problem, get it? What you do with this, that's your decision, but I don't care!"

Zoro turned around and left the other one behind. He walked through the room into the bathroom of the Shichibukai and he should be right; even here, between the towels he found a bottle with clear liquid. He was pretty mad. He had no idea what was going on here or what the hell was wrong with the other. He only knew that he hated being thrown through the room like a ball and listening to the words of some madman, for he already had enough problems with Eizen.

When he had washed his face and returned to the main room, he saw the Shichibukai squatting at the edge of the bed, his face buried in his hands. Well, hopefully he wouldn't start bawling now.

"What the hell are you doing?"

The other did not respond.

Murmuring under his breath, Zoro picked up the heavy armchair that had overturned during his flight session and settled in it.

"You bastard broke me at least one rib," he complained as he opened the bottle and took a generous sip. It was absinthe. Not that Zoro was picky when it came to alcohol, but this really wasn't the good stuff. Shrugging his shoulder, he took another sip, for disinfection of the internal wounds of course. With his eyebrow raised, he observed the Shichibukai, who still didn't move.

"I think I've figured out why you didn't want to train me any further. I think I'm ready now." Again, he received no reaction from the elder, slowly it became creepy. But it was even more annoying, so Zoro drank from the disgusting brew and kept talking. "By the way, the meeting was quite interesting, it was about the relocation of the Marine Headquarters."

Mihawk still didn't react so Zoro took that as a sign to talk. He told the other about everything that had happened during his journey, from Yaone to Comil to the meeting and its outcome. He even mentioned his conversations with Eizen, paying attention to what he was telling the other, regardless of whether the Shichibukai listened to him at all. Zoro also spoke about the things he had been thinking about concerning his training and how he had come to his decision.

All this time there was no reaction from the elder and after Zoro had nothing more to say and the bottle of absinthe was also well emptied, they just sat there in silence. Through the wide window behind the head end of the bed, the night had long since fallen in and only pale moonlight cast blurred shadows over the few furniture.

Zoro, meanwhile, had pinned his eyes to Yoru. The sword to the left of his master seemed to hum constantly, now much quieter than before, but still not as pleasant as usual. He suspected that even the Black Sword was not used to its master letting himself go like this.

Zoro really wondered what had happened while he had left the island. His back still hurt, but a few cracked rips wouldn't stop him. His left wrist on the other side bothered him a little more. He hadn't noticed it at first, probably because of the adrenaline or simply because he had snapped for a second, but as swollen as it was now, he could assume that something was broken as well.

Sighing, he emptied the absinthe. To his surprise, he saw Mihawk looking up and at him with at least as much astonishment.

"Roronoa?" He muttered. "You are still here?"

"Obviously."

Mihawk still looked at him like an unfamiliar creature.

"Why are you still here?" He asked, confused.

"Where should I have gone?" Zoro replied with a shrug.

Now the other turned his gaze away.

"I am sorry," he whispered, "I hurt you."

"Oh, don't worry about it." Again, Zoro shrugged. "Not my worst injuries, especially not from you."

But the Shichibukai still didn't look at him. With one hand he rubbed his neck and with the other he tried to stroke the wild strands of hair back, but reluctantly they jumped forward again.

"Are you finally telling me what's going on?"

Now the Shichibukai looked at him. It wasn't that Zoro was keen to deal with the problems of others, but hey, that guy had just catapulted him through the room like a cannon ball and then didn't move for over half an hour, something wasn't right and if Zoro wanted to train tomorrow, he'd have to sort it out now.

"Why do you even care? You would be right to leave this room and never want to change a word with me again."

"Oh God, you are pathetic." Unnerved, Zoro rolled his eyes. "Have you always been so dramatic, or did it come with the age?"

Shaking his head, he leaned to the side to keep a better eye on the other.

"Well honestly, that easily you won't get rid of me, you have to come up with something other than your theatrical behavior." Quietly, he sighed. "Besides, we are friends, aren't we?"

He could see Mihawk stop breathing, which he accepted with a quiet smile.

"Look, it's true, all this stuff here is incredibly annoying, but I learned from my crew that friends are there for each other. I'm not as good at this stuff like Robin, but I'm the only one here, so tough look."

Grinning, Zoro watched as the other processed his words. Then the elder laughed quietly and shook his head.

"You are incredible, Roronoa."

"Tell me something I don't know."

Again, they looked at each other.

"So, what happened, Mihawk?" Zoro repeated his question, not so much because he was really interested, but rather because he could do without something like this happening again in the next few days.

"Nataku was here," the other muttered.

"Homura?"

Mihawk nodded to the floor. This would at least explain why the Shichibukai had resisted Zoro's journey so little and had not even insisted on coming along.

"We had an argument and well, what can I say, it seems like I lost."

"And that's why you're making such a fuss?"

"It was about Sharak."

"Oh." So, it had been about his deceased sister, who had adored little-Mihawk, the woman who, according to the Shichibukai, had far surpassed even his abilities.

"You know Nataku was her fiancé?"

Zoro nodded slightly. At some point somewhere he had already picked that information up.

"In his opinion, I will be your downfall, just as I drove my sister to her death."

Zoro didn't know what surprised him more, what Mihawk had just told him, or that he spoke to him so openly at all.

"I know that my feelings towards Sharak have always been quite extraordinary and I cannot deny that she died because of me. But I do not want to be responsible for your death, I do not want that something might happen to you because of..."

"One more word and I will throw some bottles again!" Shocked, the other pulled his head up and stared at him, while Zoro held the empty absinthe bottle at its neck, ready to throw it at any time. "I haven't heard such a nonsense in a long time and I'm a member of a crew full of idiots."

"Roronoa?"

"Don't Roronoa me. Did you just listen to me for a second? I decide my fate, okay? Not you, not Luffy, and certainly not some third-rate Marine swordsman, who is too stupid to know when to keep his mouth shut."

"But Roronoa, what are you..."

"Shut up!" Now he threw the bottle, but so lightly that it only slapped against Mihawk's arm and clumsily thumped on the blanket. "So, to make this clear once and for all. I have no idea what was going on with your sister back then and honestly, I don't care. But as far as I'm concerned, I can make my own decisions, no matter what you or some idiot says, and I won't let anyone take that right away. For all I care, you are my downfall or the incarnate misfortune. For all I care, you have driven your sister to death and are so fanatical that you do the same with me. But do you know what? These are all your problems!"

The other opened his mouth, but Zoro wasn't finished.

"You know, I'm strong and I do have an even stronger will. Maybe your sister didn't get along with your weirdness, no idea, maybe you were really obsessed with her like a madman. I don't care, but I get on with it, I can deal with bad luck. I can manage you with all your annoying quirks, with all your arrogant behavior and all your unnecessary worry. Because I am strong and because I can take care of myself and make decisions for myself."

Mihawk still looked at him in disbelief, even shaking his head slightly.

"So, stop disrespecting my decisions. I am old enough to choose the people in my life. You're really annoying, but not as bad as the fucking cook, and I can deal with you most of the time quite well, so don't pretend I'm not responsible for all this here, as if you were to blame for anything. In the house Dracule it might be a rule to take responsibility for those you bring home, but I am a Roronoa and a Roronoa does not let anyone make decisions for themselves."

Deeply, Zoro breathed in. How did the others from the crew always manage to talk so much during such conversations? He was already annoying himself.

The Shichibukai first looked at the bottle next to him and then looked up to him.

"A lot of words by your standards, Roronoa," the elder agreed.

"And you're pretty stupid by your standards," he said, rubbing his eyes. Man, the other was such a bother.

"Did you seriously mean all of this what you just said?" Mihawk looked at him with his head tilted. "Or do you just say that to make me feel better?"

"Tze." Zoro smiled slightly. "I'm not lying just so some sissy won't feel attacked, you should know."

The elder nodded, rose, and looked out of the window with his arms crossed. Zoro watched him. The small outburst of anger had at least made him sober.

"I have to apologize to you, Roronoa," Mihawk said again as rational as always. "Once again I let myself be overwhelmed by my emotions and put you in danger. Something like this should not happen to someone like me."

Shaking his head, Zoro also folded his arms.

"What's the deal about emotion and danger?" He got up and went to the door. "You know, I don't care about all the crap. Time will show what is stronger, your misfortune or my luck, so stop talking about such garbage and just come with me."