Chapter 4 Prep Day

The next day, Roy, Lemmy, and Wendy were woken up really early. So early, in fact, that it was still dark outside. Roy dragged himself out of bed, his arms lugging across the dirty floor. He yawned the mother of all yawns as he made his way down to the dining hall. When he got there, he was greeted by a grinning Bowser and a smirking Kamek.

"Good morning, my little teachers!" Bowser exclaimed. Wendy yawned and stretched.

"What time is it anyway?" she asked.

"Oh, about four o'clock," Bowser replied nonchalantly. Roy gawked.

"Four o'clock...you people are all insane!"

"Yeah! For crying out loud, it's Sunday! We don't start teaching until tomorrow!" Lemmy said. An impish quality entered Kamek's features.

"That's true. But you still need to get to the school in order to prepare your classrooms for the week," he said with an extra drop of sadism. Wendy cringed.

"Is it too late to give us normal punishments?" she asked. Bowser laughed like a seal.

"Oh ho ho, that's a good joke, Wendy!" The door to the kitchen opened, and out came three waiters. They placed a plate of pancakes in front of each Koopalings. "Now, eat up!"

Lemmy and Wendy, after giving Bowser and Kamek uncomfortable looks, started to chow down on their pancakes. Roy, however, took his sweet time. He thought that if he took long enough, he wouldn't have enough time to get to Dragonbite afterward. That way, he could spend the day playing video games with Larry. He slowly raised his fork to his mouth and chewed on his pancake with the speed of a sloth. He repeated this process with the other bite. It went so slowly, in fact, that Lemmy and Wendy had already finished by the time he was at his fourth bite. Roy grinned, happy to have thought of such a clever idea.

"Okay, guys!" Bowser said. "It's time to get to Dragonbite!"

Roy dropped his fork. His mouth, still stuffed with a bite of pancake, hung open like a ziploc bag.

"But I didn't finish my breakfast yet!"

"Well, it's already four thirty! You need to get into the air if you want to be at Dragonbite by six!"

Roy swallowed his pancake bite. He looked over at Wendy and Lemmy.

"Man," he whispered. "I haven't even started teaching yet and already I can tell I'm going to hate it."

"That's the spirit!" Kamek exclaimed. "Now go on! Chop chop!"

Roy despised his classroom as soon as he saw it. It was just….so….dull! Nothing stood out about it aside from the fact that Roy sneezed about four times when he entered it. The carpet was an ugly gray, the desk at the front was like a big wooden rock. The chairs (what few there were) were so tacky that Roy wouldn't be surprised if they were made out of tacks! And the worst part? He had to clean it.

Roy groaned like a zombie as he made his way around the room with a trash can. He picked little pieces of trash out of the carpet. He took the time to wipe the whiteboard down. When he was done with all of this, both his arms and his brain hurt. He moaned and took off his sunglasses.

"This is so stupid," he muttered as he rubbed his eyes. "I'm a bulky brute, not a teacher's substitute!" Roy giggled. "Hey, that rhymed!"

Right at that moment, to Roy's complete surprise, a knock sounded on the door. Roy put his sunglasses back on and faced the entryway.

"Who could that be?" He made his way over and opened the door. "Hello?" he asked as he slowly stepped out of the classroom.

"Not the most creative of greetings," a female voice said. "I'll give it a B plus."

Roy turned and gasped in astonishment.

"Celia! What are you doing here?"

Roy's girlfriend grinned as she approached him.

"I went up to the castle to see you, and Bowser told me that you'd be here." She gently cupped his right cheek. "I never would have thought that you'd be a teacher."

Roy smiled, his heart fluttered at her touch.

"Yeah. I'm a talented guy."

Celia laughed and kissed him on the lips. Roy kissed her back, allowing himself to be drawn into the moment. However, the moment was quickly interrupted when he heard another, deeper voice speak up.

"Okay guys. Public Displays of Affection are forbidden on this campus."

Roy stopped kissing Celia and grinned.

"Oh, hey Ludwig. Whatcha doing here?"

The blue haired special smiled and floated over to the two lovebirds.

"Oh, not much. Bowser just assigned us to watch over you guys to make sure you don't peace out on your punishment."

Roy's heart sank, his shoulders slumped. Great. Yet another reminder that he was in trouble. Because he just did not have enough of those.

"Oh," he said sullenly. He turned toward Celia. "So you're just here to be an overseer."

Celia looked at him with her eyes twinkling like the stars.

"Well, actually, that's more Ludwig's job than anything else. I'm just here because I want to watch the chaos unfold."

Roy snorted.

"Thanks so much," he said sarcastically. Celia just laughed while Ludwig snickered.

"Oh, don't worry so much about it, Roy," he said. "After all, why should you be so down when we haven't even given you your gifts yet?"

"Gifts?" Roy perked up immediately. "What kind of gifts?"

In response to this question, Ludwig pulled a coffee mug out of his hammerspace. He handed it to Roy, who read the writing on the front.

"'Tears of Students.'" Roy laughed. "Oh, that's awesome!"

"Thanks," Ludwig said. "I picked it out myself."

"Oh, and I got you a gift too!" Celia said. She reached into her hoodie pocket and pulled out a tiny glass bottle. Roy took it and opened it up. Inside was what appeared to be a lumpy brown rock. Roy sniffed it, but it didn't give off a smell.

"Uh, what is this?" he asked. Ludwig took the bottle and peered inside.

"Wait." He glanced at Celia, an incredulous look on his face. "This isn't what I think it is, is it?"

Celia just grinned, which apparently was all the answer Ludwig needed. His mouth gawked open.

"R...really!" He said in disbelief and disgust. "Celia, when you said you were getting him a gift for his classroom, I expected a Newton's Cradle or something. Not...this!"

"What! What is it?" Roy asked as he snuck another glance into the bottle. Ludwig hesitated as he slowly turned back to him.

"Well, Roy...do you know how a dog is supposed to eat?"

Roy felt the seeds of confusion be planted in his mind.

"Yeah."

"Well...after a dog has chewed up its food and the particles have made their way through the digestive tract...whatever isn't used as energy must be removed from the body so it's excreted in the form of...waste."

Roy snuck another glance down into the bottle. His confusion from before felt like it was doubling.

"Huh?" he asked. Celia grinned.

"It's dog poop."

"DOG POOP!" Roy screamed. He dropped the bottle, but Ludwig caught it via the use of his telekinesis. Roy approached his smiling girlfriend with an angry look. "Why would you get me that?"

"Because. There's actually a story behind it."

"Yeah, Celia, I think I just told the story behind it," Ludwig said as he sent a cringe filled face down toward the bottle. Celia continued to smile.

"You see, back when I was in second grade, my own teacher had a bottle of petrified dog poop on their desk. They kept it as a reminder that some days you're on top of the world, and other days you feel…." Celia gestured toward the bottle…"crappy."

Roy began to understand. Now, his whole attitude toward his gift was starting to change.

"Oh!" He took the gift away from Ludwig. He smiled as he rattled its contents against the glass walls. "That's actually really cool!"

"Not as cool as Celia's taste in gifts!" Ludwig said sarcastically. He squinted his eyes at her and put on a sardonic smirk. "Seriously Cee. A cradle. It works wonders."

Celia just giggled. She turned to Roy as Ludwig sighed and started making his way over to the classroom door.

"I'm glad you like it," she said. "I was worried it might be a little too extreme."

"Oh no no, it's perfect!" Roy exclaimed. "I think my music students will really get a kick out of it!"

That caused Ludwig to instantly turn around.

"Woah woah wait, hold on; hold up." He pointed toward the door, his eyebrow raised. "You're teaching a music class?"

"Uh, yeah?"

Now Ludwig's mouth was hanging open.

"And you didn't think to tell me!"

Roy stared at his brother, who had his dropped jaw and his eyes unblinking. He shrugged.

"So?"

"S...so?" Ludwig placed his hand on his chest. "Uh, Roy, hello, you're talking to the music master! I write songs for a living!"

"You do? Since when?"

"Since I was three! Roy, I came out of my egg knowing this stuff; I can help you!"

Roy scoffed so loudly that he sprayed spittle all over Ludwig's front.

"Pffft! Help? With music? Oh come on, it's not like music is going to be that hard to teach. I mean…it's just noise!"

Ludwig gasped. His body stiffened up, and the whites of his eyes grew to completely block out his pupils. His mouth hung open, as if it were frozen in place for a brief period.

"Ay ay ay," he said as he withered to the ground. Roy and Celia stared at him as he laid on the floor. Roy slowly turned to Celia as his stomach started to quench up.

"Uh...right?"

"What? No!" Celia said. "Roy, there's a lot more to music than just noise!"

"EXACTLY!" Ludwig said as he sprung to his feet. Blue fire started to overtake his hands as he scowled. "For example, do you know about music theory? Composition? The different musical genres?"

"Uhh…"

"Or how about the different eras?" Ludwig asked. The flames around his hands grew to cover his arms. He approached Roy, who started backing away. "The classical era, baroque era, romance, modern day….DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE SUBJECT WHATSOEVER?"

Roy cast his brother a nervous smile.

"If I say yes, will you let me live?"

Ludwig growled. The flames were covering his whole body at this point. He gritted his teeth as his eyes glowed white. He looked like he was about to spring at Roy, but thankfully Celia stepped in between them.

"Woah woah, Ludwig, calm down!" she said. "You don't want to hurt Roy, do you?"

Slowly but surely, Ludwig's eyes stopped glowing, and the flames receded. He let out a sigh and walked into the classroom. Roy saw him go over to the corner, similar to a toddler who had been put in the naughty spot. He was muttering under his breath, which caused Roy to snort.

"You know what?" He puffed out his chest like a superhero. "I suddenly feel really good about tomorrow."