Author Notes - Yay for trying to get a floor done in one chapter only to realise you're too many words in before you even get to the boss. *glances at word count* Okay, so, um... I suppose we can have some of the divided chapters be as long as the first...

Thanks to silu785 and The-Black-Forest-Cake-Is-A-Lie for the favourites!

UPDATE 31/03/21 - Fixed typos, eliminated some paragraph breaks, and made other minor changes

CHAPTER SEVEN - A COMPLETE COP-OUT

With the purple clubs key grabbed from the Gift Shop, in a manner with no problems beyond a couple more Goobs that went down with ease, Luigi and Daisy made their way down to the final shop on the bottom floor via the escalators. As soon as Daisy put her foot down on the escalator, it moved from beneath her, jolting her forward.

'Whoa!'

She fell onto her face as the now-moving escalator carried her away.

'Daisy!' Luigi cried.

He got on and, while stumbling a few times, ran after her. The moving platform threw off his balance.

'Are you okay?'

Daisy got up like nothing had happened. 'You expect a little fall to hurt me? I just wanna know what made these escalators move all of a sudden.'

Luigi shivered as an eerie vibe settled over him. It was a similar vibe to that he felt from the hotel staff, but somehow stronger. Polterpup, unaffected by the movement underneath him, sniffed around. He picked up something that worried him.

Daisy shrugged. 'Eh. It's convenient.'

The escalator brought them down to their final destination. The moment they arrived at the store, they noticed a major problem.

'Oh.' Daisy stated simply. Luigi added in a groan.

The entrance of the store was blocked off, not by bars like the others but by horizontal panels of solid, albeit rather flimsy, plastic that left no room to squeeze through. Luigi peered closely at the 'gaps' between the panels. The gaps were there, but even a worm would struggle to fit its body through them. Looking through the window, he could see not only floating scissors cutting the hair of non-existent people but the register at the back as well. The lock matched the purple club key he had on him.

'Well, that's just great.' Daisy sighed, rolling her eyes. 'I'll bet that place has the key we need. You're good at puzzle solving. What do you think?'

Luigi stepped back to get a view of the entire store, and scanned his eyes across for any sort of notable details. The clubs next to the big pair of scissors on the sign had a joint in the middle of both of them. It seemed like, if given enough force, they could spin. He aimed his Poltergust up at one of the clubs, and sure enough, once air flowed out from his weapon it proceeded to spin. It picked up in speed every second, just fast enough that it almost flew off its joint. When he stopped using his Poltergust, the spinning slowed down and quickly ceased.

'Those clubs spin.' He said. 'Maybe if they both spin at once, it'll open the door... maybe.'

Daisy crossed her arms and groaned, not because of Luigi but simply because she was losing her patience. This far into this place, she just wanted to bust those stupid panels down! As she thought about this frustration, the lights on the Phantasma-Gloves glowed bright, the brightest they had yet. She gritted her teeth, and without thinking about it swung her fist at the panels.

'But they stop spinning when I'm not Poltergusting them.' Luigi continued, chin in hand. 'I think I need to get Gooigi to-'

*SMASH*

The ear-piercing sound shattered his thoughts. He screamed, stumbled over his own feet and fell to the floor. Even Polterpup had flee the scene, believing he heard thunder.

'Oh my gosh!' Daisy cried. 'I... I didn't think that would actually work!'


That smashing sound, unsurprisingly with how loud it was, reached Kruller's office. The police officer had been leaning back in the chair at his desk, until the boom greeted him.

'AHHH!'

He jumped and fell out of his chair, hitting the ground with a very audible sound. His sunglasses fell off his face and landed on his chest. Once his hyperventilating came to a stop, he leapt to his, erm, tail, and darted his head around.

'W-Who's dere?! I-I am armed, and I ain't afraid to shoot!'

A few seconds of silence passed. He sighed in relief, and picked up his walkie talkie. It wasn't on.

'I t'ink we have a break-in here in da Hotel Shops. Dis is definitely a 4-9-5. Everyone must be on patrol at once!'

He floated over to the security camera feed behind him. Wait, no, he got back on the floor and rolled over to his computers like a cop from the 70's. After getting a little dazed upon slamming into his computers, he stood up and peered closely at his security cams.

'Alright you hooligans, you're about to find out dat crime don't pay.'

He found the 'hooligans' almost immediately, thanks to the lack of activity on any other screen. Camera 05, the one for outside the salon, showed two people. One of them, the woman, had just managed to demolish his security measures in a single punch.

'O-Oh no...' Kruller gulped. 'Uh, it s-seems we got ourselves a 5-0-7 here, wit' a possible 2-4-2. And a...'

He gasped. The man who stared at the woman in shock looked eerily similar to the wanted posters. In fact, downright identical. Shivers overcame his body.

'D-Dat's him! D-Dat's da green bud! H-He's da one who's been capturin' my friends...'

After fumbling around in an attempt to find them, he picked up his sunglasses and slipped them back on.

'W-Well, I suppose I'll have to wait for him to come to me. Over!'


Luigi stared at what remained of the blockage with blank shock. Daisy shared the look. Polterpup returned to his owner's side, only once he was certain it was not thunder. Somehow, with one swift punch, Daisy had totally demolished the admittedly weak panels that had blocked her way.

'Wh... what?' Luigi stammered out, finally getting off the floor.

Daisy glanced down at her fist, which still stood stretched-out. The lights on the glove flashed rapidly and faded away. She grinned as the realisation sunk in.

'Aw, sweet! These gloves let me smash walls if I really want to! Noice.'

Luigi tip-toed over to her, unable to take his eyes off the shards scattered all over the salon floor.

'Uh, c-can you not do that?' He suggested.

She raised an eyebrow at him. 'You serious? This could save us all of the puzzles.'

'I-I know that, but... it creates a lot of noise. If we keep doing this, we might attract unwanted attention. Or, uh, demolish the entire hotel with us inside it.'

'Oh.' She said, letting her arm relax. 'Good thing you're here, or I would've destroyed the place by now.'

Regardless, Luigi couldn't complain too much. The deafening destruction of the gate certainly made things easier. They made their way over to the register, the only distraction being Luigi flinching a little from the scissors dropping to the floor.

'Please have the office key...' He murmured as he went to put the key in.

Just as the key was about to be put inside the lock, five big balls of fire resembling blue will-o'-the-wisps emerged from the wall.

'Uh, Luigi, what are those?' Daisy asked.

'Spirit balls...'

'Spirit what?'

The spirit balls floated hypnotically around the register, and without warning flew into it and made it seemingly vanish into thin air.

Daisy jumped back. 'Oh! They're the things that make objects seemingly disappear, right?'

She glanced down at her Phantasma-Gloves, her attention caught by the lights that grew brighter every second.

'Yeah.' Luigi said. 'So I'll need to use the-'

'Hang on. I wanna try something.'

She reached her hand out to when the register used to be, and the lights on her gloves glowed more intensely. To both her and his surprise, her hands collided with what appeared to be air. Feeling around, she felt the distinctive shape of what was there before.

'Okay, it's official.' She said. 'These gloves are the best thing E. Gadd's ever invented. Can I take that?'

Without waiting for his response, she took the key away from him. He frowned, but said nothing. She felt blind, having to feel around for something that she couldn't see. That rectangular object at the bottom had to be the tray, so if she went a little to the right...

'Aha! That's gotta be the lock! So if I...'

She inserted the key into the slot, after about eight failed attempts that only resulted in the key going in random directions. That's what made Luigi stare with his mouth agape - the key only moved where it could've if the register had been materialised.

'Now watch this!' Daisy declared like a magician on stage.

She gave the key a quick turn, and - in case the sound of the tray opening didn't prove it enough - another key flew out of thin freaking air and directly into her hand.

'How d'ya like that?' She said, twirling the key on her pinky.

Every minute it seemed Luigi found something new to gape at. What he had just witnessed went against all (okay, maybe not all) he knew about the spirit balls. At the same time, if the Phantasma-Gloves could touch ghosts, they already had some physics-breaking capabilities.

Then he noticed the shape of the key. 'A yellow star? This has to be the key to the cop's office!'

'Finally! Let's just get him and the button so we can get out of here.'

Luigi reached out to grab the key, but Daisy just threw it into her other hand. Polterpup bent his knees, ready to leap up and take it from her.

'I think it's best if I carry it.' She said. 'Just in case.'

'What?! Why?' Luigi asked, glaring at her before his expression softened. 'I-I mean, you can carry it if you want, but why? Don't you trust me with the key?'

She strutted out the shattered remains of the salon's security door, swaying her hips just a little bit too much. Luigi followed after her when he realised he was being left behind.

'Just saying, not many people have managed to lose the keys to their kart for a month.'

He blushed, and stammered out nonsense several times before saying something coherent. 'I, uh, I only lost them for a couple weeks. It was getting lost on my way to the course that set me back so much.'

She used all her willpower to resist giggling. 'And I should trust you with this very important key when you manage to lose yourself, because...?'

Her smug little grin faded away when she got no response, instead of some sort of comeback like she expected. She glanced at his face, and though his expression hadn't changed she could see his true feelings through his eyes. With eyes like that, she could practically read his mind. She's right. She imagined him thinking. I shouldn't carry that key. I can't even keep myself from getting lost. She couldn't prove it, but the defeat in his eyes assured her that she was right.

'Uh, but if you want to carry the key, I'm fine with that too.' She said, handing it to him though he didn't take it. 'I mean, it's a pretty big key. I'm sure you won't lose it.'

'N-No. You should have it.' He replied, his voice weaker than usual. 'I-I'll just lose it anyway.'

Daisy's heart sank as guilt ate away at her soul. No matter how hard he tried to hide it, the hurt in his voice never failed to sadden his friends around him. She growled in her throat; he either didn't notice, or didn't want to ask her about it. Time and time again, she'd tell a somewhat mean joke that Luigi would misinterpret and then assume the worse. The fact that she never seemed to learn frustrated her. Yes, part of it was Luigi's fault - he needed to learn how to take jokes better, as hard as it was - but she had to remember that Luigi was 'different' and struggled to take jokes at his expense.

And she never did. At least it wasn't as bad as the 'joke' she cracked on their first date.

'I mean, I'm only dating you cos you're the closest I'll get to Mario, so...'

'Uh, D-Daisy?'

The meek, nasally voice brought her back into reality, where upon she realised that she had zoned out and was staring into space. Good lord, the look in his eyes... she had to look away so she could focus on their mission.

'Well, what are we waiting for? Let's bust this cop already!' She giggled. 'Get it? Bust the cop? Because he's-'

'Yeah, I get it.' Luigi said, giving her a look.

She crossed her arms and pouted. 'Like you don't like puns.'

With the key now in their possession, the trio made their way onto the right, moving-upwards escalator. Waiting for it to carry them up would take too long, so they walked with it to get to the top as soon as possible... until they reached the halfway point. The escalator on both sides came to an abrupt stop, sparks popping out of the sides. The Poltergust on his back, weighing him down, prevented Luigi from losing his balance too much when the floor stopped moving underneath him. Daisy on the other hand...

'OOF!'

She fell rather unceremoniously onto her face. Fortunately, the gloves absorbed most of the impact from her hands, which had hit the ground first.

She tapped her fingers against the unmoving floor. 'You know what? I think you're right. Haunted buildings are out to get you, and you only.'

Not waiting for her to get up, the escalator begun to move once again.

Downwards.

Her eyes widening, she shot to her feet and tried to walk against it. It matched her speed, keeping her in place no matter how many steps she took. Luigi, on the other hand, didn't fight back against it at all. Sensing in the back of his mind that this wasn't safe, he allowed it to carry him to the bottom.

'Hang on Luigi!' Daisy yelled, speeding up. 'I nearly got it.'

But no matter how fast she ran, she remained in place. The moving platform beneath her feet managed to keep up with her speed perfectly, regardless of how quickly she tried to fight. Polterpup, totally unaffected, sniffed the walls of the escalator again. That odour was anything but good.

She grunted. 'Okay! There's obviously some undead joker who thinks this is funny. Come at me!'

Two big red arms emerged from the floor and gripped onto the sides of the escalator, as a deep growling could be heard. Unlike the meagre arms of any other ghost seen before, these were noticeably big and muscular. Big enough that those hands alone could snap her spine.

'I repeat...' Daisy said between exhausted breathes. 'COME AT ME!'

From the still-speeding floor, popped out a ghost. A big red ghost with a size comparable to a Thwomp, with the rectangular shape to match. And his glowing white scowl stood directly in front of Daisy's face.

'Whoa!'

She jumped back in surprise, losing her footing and falling backwards. The moving floor made her bounce down to the first floor like they were stairs. She only came to a stop once her rear hit the stationary floor on the bottom.

'Daisy!' Luigi cried. 'You o-?'

She stood up and dusted herself off. 'No need to keep asking.' She clenched her fists, the lights on the gloves glowing.

The big red ghost, known as a 'Hammer', pounded his chest with open palms like a gorilla on the attack. Each pound unleashed a small shockwave. It successfully showed dominance over Luigi, but not so much Daisy.

'HAROLD MAD!' The Hammer yelled. 'HAROLD CATCH GREEN GUY AND RECEIVE MONEY! HAROLD WANT MONEY!'

Purple spectral walls emerged from thin air and slammed into the ground, blocking off the way to the stores on the bottom floor and the entirety of the top floor. Daisy smirked, and gave the Hammer a gesture that screamed 'bring it on'. You could almost see the action movie title pop up underneath her face. Luigi shaking like jelly in the background served as the comic relief.

'S-Should you be doing that?' He asked.

'Absolutely!'

The Hammer, known as Harold apparently, clenched his huge fists, and charged down the escalator with his hand out in front. A trail of small flames accompanied his fist.

'HAROLD HURT ANNOYING PRINCESS!'

Daisy's grin grew; she loved being called 'annoying'.

'Head's up, sweetie!' She announced.

'Huh?!' Luigi stammered.

Harold swung his flaming fist her way, aiming directly for the face, but she ducked under it - just barely missing the flames - and rolled to the side. She flawlessly transitioned from the roll to a stand, right next to the confused and panicked Luigi, and beckoned for another attack.

'Show me what ya got!'

'D-Daisy!'

The Hammer growled and, without warning, slammed his fists into the ground, unleashing a grand crimson shockwave with a nice loud THUD. Luigi went into instinct mode, and immediately pressed both the suck and blow button at the same time. Air burst from the back of his Poltergust, launching him into the air for a second. The shockwave passed underneath him harmlessly. Luckily, Daisy jumped with him at the same time. Both landed with only a slight stumble.

'That's all ya got?'

'P-Please stop antagonising him...'

Harold, upon seeing that his targets had dodged both his attacks, turned even redder. He pounded his open palms against his chest again, more violently than before.

'HAROLD MAD!'

Daisy nudged Luigi's shoulder with her elbow, and murmured something along the lines of 'alright, your cue'. After a few seconds of thinking it over, he nodded and began charging up his Strobulb.

'MORTALS MUST PAY SO HAROLD GETS PAID! BOSS ONLY PAY IF GREEN GUY DELIVERED! SO MORTALS MUST-'

Luigi cut him off mid-sentence with a flash to the eyes. Despite the Hammer's bulk, the bright light stunned him the same way as all the ghosts before him.

The green-clad ghostbuster jumped at his chance, and began sucking the big ghost into the Poltergust. Oh wait, no, he tried to suck up the big ghost. Though the stunned Hammer couldn't move, he wouldn't get into the Poltergust no matter how long Luigi held the button down for.

And unlike Chambrea, who at least got her tail stuck, Harold didn't even do that.

'I... I can't get him in!' Luigi cried. 'The Poltergust can't get a grip!'

Harold shook off the daze from the light, and glared at the plumber. It didn't do him any good, as Luigi just stunned him again.

'Hold him there!' Daisy said as she handed the key to Luigi.

He shoved the key away into his pocket. 'Uh, okay?'

Luigi kept the Poltergusting going, even though all it accomplished was removing tiny little specks of energy away from the Hammer's unmovable body.

Daisy left his side and ran around to the other end of the big angry ghost. He was just as bulky from behind as he was at front, except for the two small tails sticking out from what appeared to be his rear end. If ghosts even had rear ends.

'Okay, what's your idea?' Luigi asked, flashing one more time.

'I'm getting to it. I'm getting to it!'

No doubt if Luigi ran around and grabbed onto one of the tails, the ghost would go down into the Poltergust exactly like any other ghost.

She smirked; who said Luigi had to grab onto him? Or anything about just one tail?

'C-Can you hurry up?' Luigi asked. 'I like not being turned into a pancake!'

Well, no need to keep him waiting. With the lights on the gloves glowing bright, she slapped her hands over the tails, one in each hand, and held on tight. She had to admit - the big tails took more strength to grip onto than the Goobs did.

'HUH?' Harold said, feeling something on his tails. 'GET OFF HAROLD SO HAROLD CAN KILL PRINCESS!'

Harold flew around the small area the spectral fences had gated them into. Luigi watched, with a growing grin, his princess hang on tight as the ghost dragged her across the floor.

She let go of one tail to wave her hand in the air like she was twirling a lasso. 'YEEEEEE-HAW! Ged along li'l ghostie!'

Daisy knew that riding the ghost like this did nothing to actually beat it, but the rush of her shoes scraping the ground and the air blowing through her hair was just too good.

'HAROLD HATE PRINCESSES! AND PRINCES TOO! HAROLD SEE NO DIFFERENCE!'

She rolled her eyes. As fun as wrangling the guy was, she already had enough of his butchering of language itself. Not to mention that grabbing onto such a big target was actually beginning to tucker her out.

'Alrighty, that's enough.' She said, like an exasperated parent.

'Get 'em, Daisy!' Luigi cheered into a makeshift megaphone made from his hands.

'ARF ARF!' Polterpup yelped while dancing on his hindlegs.

Daisy flashed the green-clad plumber a wink, making him blush. She held onto both the tails tight, and with a great heave slammed his face into the floor. The shockwaves created knocked the bins over, covering the floor with trash.

'PRINCESS ANNOYING! PRINCESS IN WAY OF HAROLD'S PAY!'

'Pronouns; use them!'

She bashed his face on the floor many, many more times. Each time, she could feel the struggle against her grasp slipping away. No matter how much she struck him, she refused to stop until he broke apart into scattered red particles.

A quiet voice whispered as the particles flew past her ear. 'Harold understand... Harold leave princess and green guy alone.'

Daisy dusted her hands off, marvelling at her work as the ethereal fences lifted and vanished.

'Yeah, yeah!' Luigi continued to cheer, now joining his pet in the hoppy dance. 'Daisy, Daisy, she's the best! She, um, something something... than the rest!'

Realising how his cheer fell apart just about immediately, he blushed and laughed nervously. It took so much willpower for Daisy to not just break down in girly squealing at the sight. He couldn't be more precious!

He rubbed the back of his neck. 'Hehe... I'll, uh, work on that.'

Daisy chuckled. 'No. It's perfect as is.'

Now free from the control of the Hammer, the escalators moved on their own once again. And this time, they did not speed up randomly. As they ran past the gift shop, Luigi stopped for a moment. At the corner of his eye, he could see a table with four chairs stacked onto it. The chairs weren't stacked regularly though; more like a balancing puzzle that hardly obeyed the laws of gravity at all. He turned around to get a better look, only for all four chairs to be resting on the floor like regular seats should.

Now more than ever, he began to doubt his sanity, especially considering that Daisy didn't react to this at all. With a lot of might, he managed to ignore it and move on. To the best of his abilities, at least. They arrived at the office with the star lock finally with the star key in tow. Luigi took the key out to unlock the door...

*THUD*

'Ah!'

Only to be interrupted by Daisy slamming her fist into the door. The door itself barely jolted, while Daisy held her eyes shut tight as pain shot through her arm.

Luigi dropped the key in shock. 'W-What are you doing?!'

She took her hand away and shook the pain off. 'I thought I'd punch right through this door like I did before! Are the gloves malfunctioning or something?'

He peered at their lights. They glowed dimly, as if reacting to the ghost on the other side, but certainly not as brightly as they could be.


*THUD*

'WoooAAAH!'

Officer Kruller fell out of his chair for the second time that hour. While this sound wasn't nearly as loud as the last, it came directly from behind his office door.

He peered his bare eyes over the edge of his desk, his hands shaking. 'Oh no... they've reached my office. How? I thought I hid dose keys perfectly.'

His attention fell to the lost-and-found room to his left. He was yet to close its gate, so it was still open to the general public, assuming they got into his office.

'Alright den. If dat's what youse want.' He said, slipping his sunglasses back on.

He picked up his walkie talkie. It still wasn't on.

'Breaker breaker, I got some intruders about ready to storm into my office. Don't bother wit' sendin' back-up. I got dis. Over!'

While the intruders on the other side of the door conversed with themselves, Kruller got down onto the floor and made an epic sideways roll into the lost-and-found. Wait, no. He stopped halfway through and flailed his arms about as he tried in vain to keep the roll going.

'Uh, correction. I might need back-up. Over.'

After a few seconds of struggling, he managed to heave his body towards his destination. Bumping into a box, he got up and reached his hand inside it.

'I'm sure dis is where I left it...'

He felt his hand grab something. Pulling it out, he was greeted with a tiny box. A puppet sprung out of it, and smiled right in his face.

'Gah!' He exclaimed, throwing it away. 'I t'ought I got rid of dat t'ing!'

Not one to be deterred, he reached in again. This time, he grabbed a more spherical object, one that seemed to jab into his translucent skin a bit. Turned out to be a puffed-up pufferfish.

'OH MY JAYDES!' He screamed in a voice higher-pitched than normal.

He shook his hand as wildly as he could to shake that confounded fish off.

'Who is even losin' dese fish?! Is it Fishook's? Or Soulfflé's? Or... whatever, get it away from me!'

Giving that box one last chance, he peered into it and searched for the object he desired.

He smiled. 'Bingo! I am now armed and ready. Over!'


'Maybe it has a cool-down?' Luigi suggested as he turned the key. 'Or maybe it's an anger thing?'

Daisy huffed. 'Well, I suppose that gives me another reason not to just break every door down. It won't work half the time!'

Luigi pushed the door open, not at all expecting what greeted him on the other side.

'FREEZE wit' your hands up!'

Office Kruller stood on the other side, towering over all three of our heroes. He had a gun, pointed directly at Luigi's head.

'Wah!'

Luigi, without thinking, jumped out of the way and cowered behind Daisy, shaking like an overplayed maraca. The moment he realised what he did, shame overwhelmed him. He was supposed to be the hero, glorious and brave, and there he was, hiding behind his maiden when he was too frightened. And here he thought he was above such cowardly acts. Like all situations like this, he had to make up for it before anyone got mad. Or upset. Or broke ties with him.

'I'm s-so sorry Daisy!' He cried. 'I-I wasn't thinking, and I-'

Only then did he realise that Daisy was not listening. She instead gave Kruller the most 'are you for real?' look you have ever seen, which contrasted quite well with his super-serious one. This was in spite of the fact that he had a gun pointed to her forehead.

'Officer...' She glanced at his nametag. 'Kruller, that's a water gun.'

And she was absolutely right. With its bright red colouring and the big tank on top, no one could mistake it for the real thing. Except a panicked Luigi, apparently. For Kruller, it was the most he had. No way in the Underwhere he was letting real guns anywhere near his office.

'Youse have da right to remain silent!' He declared. 'Anythin' youse say can and will be used against youse when, um, Ms Gravely eventually comes to pick youse up.'

'Once again. Water gun.'

Just to make it worse, Kruller's hand was shaking so he couldn't even hold the harmless weapon still.

'I said hands up!'

She gave him the look for a few more moments, and raised her hands up in the most unenthusiastic manner she possibly could.

'N-Now, state your name and business.'

With a sigh, she answered. 'Princess Daisy of Sarasaland. This guy is my partner Luigi, and his pet Polterpup. We just want that elevator button.'

Her eyes darted to the button on his belt. It was most certainly in reach. What was stopping her from grabbing it and running? Aside from Luigi trying to stop her. He'd probably say that Kruller would go alert the others, and summon back-up, and attack them, and... actually, Luigi had a point.

Kruller's hardened expression softened, and he lowered the gun just a bit. 'Dat's... Dat's it? Just da button? Not... all of da merchandise, or my money, or anythin'? Just da button.'

'Yep. Just give us the button and we'll be out of here.'

The panicked cop pondered the deal over. As far as he was aware, it seemed totally fair. They got what they wanted, and he didn't have to deal with them much longer. If anything, they deserved a little more for being so nice. Still, he could absolutely give up the borderline-useless thing. He was about to drop his weapon and hand over the button with no questions asked, until something stopped him. Nothing physical, but instead a force that encased his mind.

Don't give them that button, you fool! His boss's voice rang through his head. They'll betray you and your friends. You don't want that, do you? Those mortals are scum. They capture our kind indiscriminately. If you give them that button, you'll be no better.

He slipped his gun into his belt and folded his arms. 'Okay then. You'll hafta come wit' me.'

Daisy dropped the 'you serious?' look. 'What? Why? Can't you just give it to us now?'

'We hafta talk it over foist. Make sure it's a fair deal, ya know.'

Refusing to take his eyes off them, Kruller floated backwards into the lost-and-found, beckoning for them to follow.

Daisy sighed. 'Okay. Fine. Just make it quick. Com'on Luigi.'

She followed Kruller with about as much excitement as a rock. Luigi shook in place for a few seconds before going after her with a stumble. The hairs on his neck stood up; something felt wrong here. Horribly, horribly wrong. And considering what happened last time he didn't follow his instinct...

'Is this really a good idea?' He asked as he stepped into the next room.

'We need the button.' Daisy responded. 'Enough said.'

Luigi glanced around. The lost-and-found clearly didn't have a lot of people (or ghosts) coming into it. The musty air greeted him once again, albeit much more breathable this time. The boxes had been stacked precariously, with their various contents spilling out. Everything between golf clubs, pineapples, shoes, sports balls - wait, shoes?

Daisy kicked at a pair of sunglasses. 'Okay. We're in. What now?'

*CLANK*

The gate slammed shut behind them.

'Wah!'

'Hey!'

Daisy rushed to the bars and shook them violently. The lights on the glove glowed, but not nearly bright enough. Kruller just got done locking up the lost-and-found, and glared at her through the bars.

'Youse've been convicted of vandalism and t'reatenin' to hurt a cop!'

Luigi brought his flashlight to his chest and hugged it tight. It gave him safety from the sudden sensation of being trapped. He used all of his willpower to relax his haphazard breathing. Had his mind been working right, he'd simply withdraw Gooigi. As is, there was just too much to focus on.

'What?! We never threatened you!' Daisy yelled. 'The vandalism, fine. I take full responsibility. But we just want the button! You even seemed willing to give it to us at first! What happened?'

Kruller's leer hid his serious contemplation. He recalled wanting to give them what they desired, but he couldn't remember what made him change his mind. But he had changed his mind and he wasn't doing it again.

'Robbin' a police officer is a felony.' He said, dropping the matter almost entirely. 'And I'll see to it dat Ms Gravely gives youse da proper punishment.'

Daisy squeezed the bars of her prison as the lights illuminated brighter. The metal morphed to her fingers, but it just wasn't enough to break through. Kruller picked up his walkie talkie from the desk. Still not on, man.

'Officer Kruller comin' t'ru. I have apprehended da criminals. Dey tried to steal my elevator button away from me. Very soon, I will deliver dem to Ms Gravely who shall do as she pleases. Over!'

He sat down in his desk chair, putting his head on his arms as he leaned back. Licking his lips, he reached for a box of donuts that had been resting on his desk.

'Ya done good, Kruller. Ya done good.'

Daisy turned around to Luigi. He remained in the middle of the dusty room, holding onto his flashlight for dear life.

'Luigi!'

'Huh?'

Her voice brought him back into reality, the cold reality of being trapped. The sound of the princess calling his name calmed his nerves, even if just a bit.

'Use Gooigi!' Daisy said. 'He can get through these bars.'

Luigi knocked his fist against his skull. Gah, I'm so stupid! Why didn't I think of that before? He deployed Gooigi onto the floor, and took a few moments to get his bearings. The wobbly green filter still disoriented him, but the musty air seemed so much fresher when in the body of someone without lungs.

As he ran towards the gate, he noticed that he walked with much more balance now, without his jelly legs making him wobble all over the place. If Gooigi had a mouth, he'd smile; he was getting the hang of this new body faster that he thought he would.

'Show 'im, Luigi!'

Though the bars were close together, Gooigi slipped his viscous body through them with ease. Any rips in the goop reformed almost immediately. The fear he felt did not appear on his blank face. Kruller glanced to his left as a green figure entered his point-of-view.

'OH GOODNESS!'

He didn't fall out of his chair this time - an improvement to be sure - but dropped his half-eaten cruller on the floor.

'How... how did youse get out? Mortals can't go t'ru walls! ... C-Can dey?'

It didn't take him long to realise that mortals typically weren't monochrome or made of gummy bears. He noticed the other man in green - the original - still in the middle of his cell like he fell asleep standing up.

'Dere's t'ree of youse?! Ms Gravely told me dere was only two of youse! Where did dis squishy guy come from?'

Gooigi stood still for a moment. This time, it wasn't due to any fear failing to show up like it did before, but instead because he didn't really want to fight the guy. A wannabe hero who's scared of everything... who does that remind me of? He saw himself in that cop, trying his hardest to do his duty despite how terrified he really was. Alas, he had no way to have a nice conversation with him in this state.

'I-I already told youse!' Kruller yelled. 'You can't have dis button!'

'Not to rush you or anything...' Daisy said, still behind the bars obviously. 'But could BUST HIM already?!'

Gooigi nodded, the only real way he could confirm that he got her order. He approached the cop, emotion gone from his gooey face. In contrast, Kruller looked more and more horrified for each step he took.

'B-Back away! I-I have a weapon!'

The fear in his voice cut Gooigi to his core. For a moment, a very short moment, he stopped in place and debated his choice. Maybe there was something he could do to not bust Kruller. But he knew he needed that button, and despite his cowardice the cop seemed very determined to hang onto it.

Let's just make it quick...

He charged the Strobulb for half the time he normally did, and flashed Kruller without really paying attention as to where he was aiming it. The light consumed the ghost entirely. Once the flash disappeared however, it revealed Kruller still sitting in his seat, as horrified as ever.

Huh?

'What?' Daisy questioned for Luigi. 'Why didn't that work?'

Gooigi didn't need to wonder for long. Experience from his time in Evershade Valley told him the answer. Just like what Greenies often employed, the dark sunglasses Kruller wore over his eyes negated anything the Strobulb would've done.

'Dang it.' He muttered, still not used to his distorted voice.

If he had any hope of getting that button back, he'd have to get those sunglasses off. And that's what the Poltergust was for. Gooigi aimed his weapon at Kruller's face...

'F-FREEZE!' The cop yelled.

In one flawless movement, Kruller hoisted his aquatic weapon out of his holster and aimed it dead between Gooigi's eyes. His already-gelatine legs shook even more. And he couldn't understand why. He had known from the beginning that the weapon was nothing more than a squirt gun. So why did he panic so much at the sight of it? What was it about a gun filled with a liquid that made him freak out, even in his normal body?

Suddenly he realised that he was in grave danger.

'Watch out for the-!' Daisy tried to warn.

Kruller fired his gun, and a stream of water hit Gooigi between the eyes. The moment the liquid made contact and trickled down his face, he could feel himself fading away. He could feel every individual drop of goo disconnecting from every other drop. His legs dissolved and joined together into a single green puddle on the ground. The floor got closer and closer, like he was passing out. Almost like quicksand, the growing puddle seemed to be consuming him. His hands dropped off and plummeted to the floor.

All the while, the process was totally painless. Granted, it was to be expected in a body that could barely feel pain to begin with, but it was still jarring to be literally sinking away and feeling none of it. Gooigi expressed nothing more than the most mild of annoyance, but Luigi's mind raced through a hundred different incoherent thoughts. His vision turned into nothing more than a green swirl.

'Wah?'

He lifted his head back up and found himself back in the lost-and-found, locked behind bars.

'Huh? Where am...?'

Upon noticing that he was no longer surrounded by a slimy filter, he realised what just happened. He blinked a few times; the process went by so fast, he couldn't even tell how he got here. One second his entire body had dissolved, the next he was back to his regular self.

Kruller gaped at his water gun. 'Um... I did not expect dat to work.'

Luigi groaned. Just his luck that he needed to fight a water-gun-wielding cop in a body that melted upon contact with water. Between this and the duster-wielding maid, his track record did not look so hot.

'Dang it.' He muttered again.

His nerves tingled, like a harmless electric shock, drowning out whatever concerned sentence that Daisy was muttering. Glancing behind him, he saw that Gooigi had returned home.

'Oh... sei serio?'

'What are you complaining about?' Daisy said, not entirely sure what he said. 'Get back out there!'

Following her advice, he summoned Gooigi once again. As soon as he saw everything in green, he spun around and slipped through the gate again.

'What?!' Kruller yelled. 'B-But I shot youse! How did youse...?'

The cop readjusted his sunglasses and scowled. He pushed his chair away, though it was completely unnecessary, and floated around his desk while keeping his eye and gun pointed directly at the gooey being in front of him.

'Don't move a muscle.' He said. 'Or I'll shoot.'

Gooigi stood as still as a lucky cat statue; as if he'd do anything else in that body. How could he get rid of those sunglasses without getting closer and facing the splash zone?

'GRRR...!'

He turned his head - he had no pupils to move - to the sound, and saw Polterpup by his side snarling at the officer.

Kruller looked down to the mutt for just a moment. 'I've worked wit' dogs. I know how to handle youse. I-I t'ink.'

Polterpup looked up to his owner with anticipating eyes. He stood there like a loyal solider awaiting an order. Gooigi pointed at the sunglasses, and he understood the instruction completely.

'I'll need da two... three... uh, four? Yeah, da four of youse to remain behind dose bars. Breakin' out of jail is a horrible crime and Ms Gravely will punish youse appropriately.'

Daisy groaned for a good three seconds. For each word that guard said about them being arrested or whatever, the bars in her hands got more and more crushed. Unfortunately, it didn't seem to be enough. Polterpup, just as fed up as she was, leapt past the cop's face. Before Kruller could even flinch, the spectral puppy snatched up the sunglasses right off his face.

'Huh? Hey!'

Giving Kruller a smug look, Polterpup chomped the glasses into nothing more than black shards on the floor.

Kruller gasped. 'D-Dat counts as destruction of property. At dis rate, your sentence will extend into da afterlife!'

In response, Polterpup turned around, shoved his rear into the air and waved it about. It was the closest he could get to flipping him off.

'Hey! Annoyin' a cop is definitely a crime! ... Maybe. I-I haven't read da rules in a while.'

Polterpup blinked at him.

'Oh! Uh, I mean... dat automatically adds an additional five years to your sentence! Over!'

Daisy cocked an eyebrow. Gooigi wasted no time, and beamed him in his exposed eyes.

Kruller shuddered from the sudden flash, and his vision turned to nothing but white. The sensation rendered him feeling helpless, even worse than the stories had him believe. And when the blinding light vanished, he found himself on the wrong end of a green vacuum cleaner.

He unleashed a scream nearly high-pitched enough to break glass. 'U-UNHAND ME! AT ONCE! ... P-Please?'

All he got from his assailant was a blank, apathetic stare.

'GETOFFMEGETOFFMEGETOFFME!'

Kruller, just like the other ghosts before, raced around the room and dragged Gooigi along with him, making clear circles around his desk. Through the translucent green skin, one could notice the purple ghostly specks that were flying off the ghoul's body travelling through the pipe and into storage. The cop fired his weapon about randomly, not getting even close to his intended target. He did, however, succeed in splashing Daisy in the face.

She spat out some water. 'Yeah! Go Luigi!' She cheered, keeping one hand on the bars. 'Bust that cop! Show 'im what... for.'

Watching her man in green take out the guard with (relative) ease, her grip on the bars loosened. A nasty thought infested her mind. Wow. She thought. He doesn't really need me, does he? She looked at her gloves. What good was touching ghosts if you couldn't even reach them? She glanced back at Luigi, who was still hunched over in a mostly-unconscious state.

It was just the Poltergust though, right? All she'd have to do was take it, wear it on her back, and then she'd be controlling Gooigi herself. She took one step, and stopped herself. No, I can't. She thought. I wouldn't know how to use the dang thing.

'Ow!' Gooigi yelled.

Daisy snapped back to the fight scene, seeing Gooigi lying face down on the floor and Kruller panting heavily in front of him.

'Dat's what you... get for... attackin' a... police officer...' Kruller said in between puffs.

The lights on the gloves began to glow intensely. How dare he shake off her Luigi like that! The bars, even if just barely, bent in her hands. Kruller reached into his pocket and pulled out another pair of sunglasses, except this pair more resembled Groucho glasses. Why on Earth he had those on his person was yet to be seen, and irrelevant as he placed them over his eyes.

'FREEZE!'

Gooigi lifted his face off the floor, and found himself staring down the barrel of a gun. A water gun held by a very shaky hand, but a gun nonetheless.

'M-Ms Gravely has given me an order, and under n-no circumstances can I disobey her! So I-I suggest you drop your weapon and cease fire immediately.'

The conscious being inside Gooigi struggled to look at the ghost before him. Every stutter only served to remind him of himself. At that moment, he cursed his apathetic body. If only he didn't need Gooigi for this fight, he could say so much.

I'm so sorry, Officer. I don't want to hurt you. I know what it's like to want to be a hero, only for your fears to let you down. Please, don't fight me. You don't have to. I'll deal with Ms Gravely myself. Just give us the button and we'll leave.

Only one thing came out.

'I understand.'

Those two simple words, containing only four syllables, made Kruller stop shaking.

'Y-Youse understand?'

Gooigi nodded. Though he was far from the best at reading subtle facial cues without keeping up a few dozen unintended ones (and the hazy green filter did not help), he guessed from the relaxing arms and small frown that his message got across. Maybe Kruller thought he meant 'I understand why you have to do this', or 'I know what it's like having crippling fears'. It didn't matter. Kruller understood him. Only Luigi could take a conversation with a cop ghost wearing Groucho-glasses seriously.

'RUFF RUFF!'

Polterpup, seeing an opportunity, left the remains of the old sunglasses and leapt at the new pair. Without even flinching, Kruller grabbed on his collar and held him in place. He did so without a hint of fear on his face, when in reality it was his terror that let him commit such a feat in the first place.

That's right. Ms Gravely's voice spoke to him. Make me proud. Show the others that you're more than just a coward. Keep that green man locked away and become everyone's hero.

Kruller nodded. 'I will make youse proud, boss.' He said seemingly to himself in a monotone voice. 'I will help youse catch dis man.'

Gooigi got to his knees and went to grab his Poltergust. The closer his hand got to the nozzle, the closer Kruller was to pulling the trigger.

'I can and will fire. I am willin' to hurt you. Don't even try.'

All of the fear in his voice had vanished, replaced with nothing, like another force had taken over his mind. Gooigi couldn't believe it. What... happened to you? Daisy, however, didn't care about his sudden change in attitude, as jarring as it was. Rage boiled up inside her, and the lights on her gloves couldn't be any brighter. And in this situation, she cared not to keep her anger under control.

'HEY!' She shouted.

Unbeknownst to her, she bent not just the bars in her hands but several at once. It created a hole in the gate that, while a bit of a squeeze, she and Luigi could slip through without a doubt. She breathed heavily; she may not have noticed, but it took a great deal of her energy. Kruller turned his head to her in an instant, and just as quickly his usual terrified expression came back to him.

'W-What?! H... how?' He stammered. 'I-I-I wasn't told dat mortals could do dat!'

His eyes darted to Gooigi, just quickly enough that the cop didn't notice what the gelatine man was about to do. With Kruller distracted, Gooigi hopped to his feet, and pressed both the 'blow' and 'suck' buttons at once. Air burst from the back of his Poltergust - or should that be 'Poltergoo'? - launching it upwards. Unlike Luigi's, which brought him into the air by its shoulder straps, a solid mass of goo connected the Poltergust to Gooigi's back, dragging him up with it.

Just as he wanted, Kruller rolled backwards onto the floor, let go of Polterpup, and - most importantly - lost his sunglasses for a second time. He had just a moment to realise that his best defence was gone.

'Uh oh...' He muttered, milliseconds before Gooigi enveloped him in a bright green light.

The gooey ghostbuster, desiring to get it over with, got him into the Poltergust immediately. Kruller dragged him about, but Gooigi couldn't help but notice that keeping his tether was far easier this time around.

'I ADMIT IT, HELLEN!' Kruller shouted as loudly as he could. 'I never wanted to do dis! I'M SCARED, HELLEN! I knew da green bud was too strong... I knew he would capture me! BUT YOUSE MADE ME DO IT ANYWAY!'

Hearing such desperate cries for... not help, but something else entirely... almost made Gooigi give up and let him go. Almost.

'I'm not brave like da others. I KNOW DAT, HELLEN! Just fire me already... I DON'T WANNA DO DIS ANYMORE!'

If Gooigi could, he'd smile. It'd be a bittersweet smile to be sure, but he had at least one happy thought right now. At least he won't have to work for Ms Gravely anymore... He could feel his grip of Kruller get extra tight, and with a simple flick of the Poltergust sent him flying through the air and crashing into the ground. Gooigi grunted; the big ghost had been the hardest thing to slam yet.

The next few slams came in quick succession, not relenting once as all Gooigi wanted was to help this guard out. With each slam, Kruller's pull weakened. Whether he was losing strength or the will to fight, Gooigi didn't want to know. After what seemed like an eternity of bashes for the both of them, Kruller finally gave up. He smiled for a moment, before wincing.

'I'M SO SORRY, HELLEN!'

And that was the last thing he said before he disappeared into the Poltergust, leaving nothing behind except for dissipating purple specks of energy. The nozzle rattled as a yellow light emerged from inside it. Gooigi got hit with nasty recoil as the elevator button burst from its prison and landed gracefully on the desk.

Gooigi let the whole situation sink in for a moment.

'Yeah! Luigi did it!' He cried with his fists in the air. 'Huh?'

No more green filter. He saw Gooigi slumping in the middle of the room, and it took him a few good seconds to realise that Daisy was dragging him by the underarms. No longer was he in the lost-and-found. In fact, Daisy just got done carrying his foot through the hole she made.

'Oh, you're awake.' She said nonchalantly, settling him down on the floor.

Luigi looked around, noticing that the only thing he could hear was a 'shining' sound emitted by the button.

He tapped his fingers on his flashlight. 'Um, do you think we could free him?'

'WHAT?!'

He flinched, even though he got exactly what he expected. Daisy, noticing his shock, cleared her throat and rather pointlessly brushed hair out of her face.

'Y-You really wanna do that?' She asked. 'He arrested us!'

'I know, but... he didn't want to do it. And I... I know what it's like. You know, to be scared.'

Daisy sighed. 'Look, if it makes you feel any better, who knows what would've happened to him if you didn't catch him. I doubt Ms Gravely would've forgiven him for failing.'

This thought brought a smile to his face, albeit a small one. The sparkling light of the elevator button helped him forget about the poor ghost he just had to bust. As he picked it up, something else piqued his curiosity. Underneath the button lay two documents, a couple newspaper articles to be exact. He spun them around to face him, and his eyes widened.

'What number is it?' Daisy asked.

Luigi peered at the date of the older paper. 'September 14, 1947.'

She blinked. 'Uh, I meant the button.'

He glanced at the button, caring more for the newspaper. 'Two.'

Daisy leaned over his shoulders, and mouthed an understanding 'oh'. The headline jumped out to them.

OFFICER KRULLER, A MALL HERO

It had a picture of a pudgy but still defined human security guard who highly resembled Kruller. It didn't take a genius to put the pieces together. Luigi knew that he had to continue his mission, but he refused to let these newspapers go without being read.

New Donk City is once again saved from an armed robbery by town hero Officer Paul Kruller. The Rambi Mall was under attack by an assailant armed to the teeth. To keep the cops off him, he had kidnapped a young boy, Johnny Deepend (6), who he threatened to murder if the police got too close.

Paul Kruller, however, swooped in and caught the crook by surprise. He freed the young boy and reunited him with his family, but not before he had the criminal in handcuffs.

'He's my hero!' Johnny has been reported to say.

Luigi chuckled. It read less like a formal newspaper and more like the writing of an excited fan. His eyes drifted over to the next paper, dated for November 18 1947, and the headline made him gasp.

TRAGEDY BEFALLS NEW DONK CITY, OFFICER KRULLER SHOT ON THE JOB

New Donk City has suffered a great tragedy. Beloved security guard Paul Kruller, known for his heroic yet friendly attitude, has lost his life at the tragically young age of 35.

The Rambi Mall was under attack by a shooter, who had taken three lives before finally being stopped. Kruller had stepped in to save young Johnny Deepend (6), and took the bullet for him.

'I can't believe we lost him.' Kruller's team mate 'Long John' said. 'I didn't think we'd ever lose such a dear friend. If his soul is still with us, he must feel awful. Not just because he lost his life, but because he'll forever feel guilty for failing to save those poor three people.'

'Oh my gosh, Luigi! Are you okay?!'

Only once Daisy called out to him did he realise that he was crying. The words became a blurry mess, for more reasons than one. He wiped his wet eyes, which did nothing to stop the tears from flowing.

'Luigi? Luigi! Sweetie, speak to me!'

Daisy knew what made him act like this. She had read both the articles herself. But what merely bummed her out affected him on a whole other level.

He was a hero... but then he... and I...

Luigi couldn't handle it anymore. Giving up on any sense of dignity or social boundaries, he wrapped his arms around Daisy and cried into her chest. The sudden embrace shocked her, as it would do to any normal person, but she did nothing to shake him off. She placed one arm around his back, and gently stroked his hair with the other. She said nothing; no words could possibly help him. No matter how much the tears and mucus stained her outfit, she had him locked in her soft hug. Polterpup couldn't stand to see his owner upset, and hugged him as tight as the ghostly dog could. No hug he could manage was tight enough.

Luigi's emotional display could seem rather extreme; he was either blank as a piece of wood, or crying his eyes out until he had no more tears left. Even he didn't understand what brought on his intense emotions sometimes.

'He... he was a hero, Daisy. He-he just wanted to be a hero again. A-And I-'

'Shhh... I know. There's nothing we can do, so let's not fret over it.'

Through the tears, he began to smile. He loved the feeling of someone, anyone, running their fingers through his hair. It relaxed any panicked nerve that he had. She flinched; the Virtual Boo starting ringing. Luigi didn't shift in the slightest, apparently too deep into the embrace to notice anything else around him. The VB continued to ring uninterrupted. Eventually, E. Gadd got the hint and stopped.

Luigi slowly opened his eyes, and settled them on the elevator button. It's okay, Officer. I'll take down Ms Gravely. For you. And Steward. And, um... Chambrea, I think her name was? Yes, for them. He broke away from the warm embrace, now filled with shaky determination, and grabbed the button. Floor 2... wasn't that the Mezzanine? A bit disappointing, considering that he could already go there, but anything got him closer to his goal of liberating not just his brother but the staff as well.

'Let's-a go!' He said, with more optimism than either person expected. 'Come on, boy!'

With Polterpup by his side and the button in his hand, he ran out the door.

'Wait, Luigi!' Daisy said. 'What about Goo-?'

As Luigi made his way through the door, Gooigi gave him a thumbs-up before dissolving into droplets and returning to the Poltergust G-00.

'Oh. Alright then.'

And she followed after her partner, to wherever the new button took him.


OFFICER KRULLER, THE COWARDLY COP

AGE - 35

GENDER - Male

CAUSE OF DEATH - Shot on the job

Officer Paul Kruller is a tragic case. He used to work for the Rambi Mall as a security guard, taking great pride in justice and donuts, and was as heroic and courageous as you'd expect a cop to be. Unfortunately, he was shot on the job while defending a young boy from a shooter. Since then, he has been terrified of everything. Since other lives were lost that day, he feels great guilt over his failure and hopes to make up for it.


Author Notes - Behind every comedic character is the potential to make them far less comedic in hindsight. In other words, Kruller is definitely my favourite Boss Ghost so far. A lot like in the game, actually. In fact, I'm actually a little worried. I'm not sure if any Boss Ghost from here on out will be nearly as good as him. I love just about everything I did with him. I will bloody try, though.

Before we say ANYTHING ELSE, the circumstances around Kruller's death are NOT supposed to be any sort of political commentary. Note the era he died in, i.e. not ours.

The kid Kruller saved when he was alive was originally 'Lindsey Kahdabrah', who IS the Lindsey you're thinking off. Then I changed how the Twisted Sisters died, in a totally different era. So now it's Johnny Deepend.

Daisy believing that she might be useless came from how I noticed that I wasn't really giving her much to do. So, instead of simply fixing that issue, I worked it into the story. Whether or not that's the lazy way out is up to you.

Why do we as Australians spell 'meager' as 'meagre'? Why do we do this?

This ending flashback is inspired by something that happened to me when I was in primary school. The biggest difference being that the principal of Luigi's school was actually on his side.


'Mrs Lucinda, your youngest son has kicked another student.' The principal said from the other side of the phone.

Martin and Lucinda refused to believe it. Luigi was the sweetest little kid they knew, and the thought of him hurting someone was laughable. Even more shocking when it turned out the victim was Waluigi, one of the few kids he got along well with. Well, not anymore.

'My son would never kick anyone!' Lucinda complained to the Koopa Troopa principal, slamming her hands down on his desk. 'You must be lying to make him look bad! It wouldn't be beneath this school.'

'What makes you think you can get away with accusing our son?' Martin demanded.

'Um... M-Momma?'

Eight-year-old Luigi sat in the corner of the office, guilt strong in his face. Close to breaking down into tears, he managed to tell the truth.

'I... I did kick him. And... I-I think it hurt.'

Both Martin and Lucinda stared at him in total shock. They couldn't even get angry. Lucinda knelt down and wrapped her arm around him.

'But... but why?' She asked.

'I...' He gulped. 'I don't know. I-I told him it was time to go to class, he ignored me, and I-' He could say no more.

Now his parents were even more shocked. Surely if he were to kick someone, it'd be for a bigger reason than that. Unless the stress had been piling up, and being ignored one more time was the straw that broke the Yoshi's back. Stress that he wasn't expressing. She pulled him into an embrace while Martin glared right at the principal.

'So you're not going to question why my normally passive son just kicked someone?!' He yelled. 'Some school this is!'

'On the contrary, Martin.' The principal said, remaining calm. 'I am very concerned about Luigi and his wellbeing. A seemingly unprovoked attack like this could be a sign of something more that he is failing to express. I suggest you see a psychiatrist as soon as possible.'

Martin and Lucinda took his advice, though they were sure there wasn't anything wrong with their little green angel. They were so glad they did.

'W-whatever I did wrong... I-I'm sorry.'

They sat Luigi down in his room, so they could finally explain it to the best of their ability.

'You've done nothing wrong, Luigi.' Martin said, patting his back.

'We just have to... talk.' Lucinda added, hesitantly.

The parents looked at each other, debating how to start.

'Is it about the doctors we've been visiting?' Luigi asked. 'Did... did they find something wrong with me?'

Lucinda took a deep breath, and decided to bite the bullet.

'Luigi, you have autism.'