Author Notes - Time for that one floor that is criminally short! Granted, I get why. It's meant to be a little break before you embark to the final floor, but come on! Those gorgeous visuals and bopping music deserved more. Like the chapters in the Paranormal Productions (with the exception of the ending of 'The Creation Outlives its Creator'), this one is mostly light-hearted compared to the others.

Because this floor is so short, I'm gonna do something interesting. Like Amadeus, Ug, and Fishook before her - who were big bosses with small floors - Gloria is basically going to be a portrait-guarding ghost minus the portrait. You'll know what I mean when we get to the battle. After all, she's gonna take after her dad. To say the least, the fight won't resemble its game self so much compared to the others...

So, because of that, expect us to get right to the boss almost immediately. The fight with Gloria and her dancers is simple in practise but surprisingly complicated in theory, and if you decide that you MIGHT add another round to an already two-round boss...

It's time to get down and boogie, as JoVay, MarioLover3752, and ultragreenyellow56 have joined the dance floor! (Or dropped some favourites/follows, same difference).

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE - DISCO'S DEAD, BABY

Luigi was excited to finally see his brother again. Polterpup was happy for him. Daisy was just relieved that the nightmare was almost over. Gooigi was just here for 'big bro'. Polterkitty, meanwhile, battled her greatest internal battle yet.

When the doors opened up, it was not exactly the expected outcome. Even though Daisy remembered the disco hall on the way up, it didn't make the arrival any less disorientating. Immediately, our heroes were greeted with blaring neon lights and catchy hip-hop beats coming from down the hall. Luigi squinted. The bright purple and green lights made his eyes hurt, and he could already feel the oncoming headache. The bopping beats did not help. Daisy, instead, tapped her foot to the beat.

'Noice.' She said. 'Whoever this Gloria chick is, she's got some talent.'

Luigi rubbed his eyes. 'Oh. I think I prefer Amadeus's works.'

'Eh. To each their own.'

Gooigi began to bubble and rumble. 'I like this music. But I don't think I can dance. I don't know how to do that yet.'

'Well, what are we waiting for?' Polterpup asked. 'This floor's the shortest yet, so let's get done with it!'

They heeded his words and embarked through the odd yet awesome floor. It looked straight out of the 80's, thanks to its neon signs, rough brickwork resembling an alleyway, and an abundance of 'radical' graffiti. As the red ropes on stanchions lead them down the hall, Luigi took note of the painting depicting a group of Goobs wearing red hoodies while facing away from the 'camera'. It made him feel like he was about to jumped by a group of greasers.

'Oh my gosh.' Daisy said, chuckling. 'How 80's can you get? This décor is so outdated, I feel like I've stepped into a time warp.' She shuddered. 'That... that hasn't actually happened, has it?'

'Daisy, that isn't fair.' Luigi said. 'For all you know, Gloria could've died in the 80's and wants to be reminded of her old life.'

'You are so good at making me feel bad for these ghosts. I just thought you should know that.'

Luigi honestly dreaded encountering the Grand Ghost of this floor, not just because he worried she may have been the toughest of them all but mostly because he had captured all of her friends below her. He had no doubts that she wouldn't take that well. But it wasn't the only thing that tormented his mind. As they made their way up a series of stairs up to a bronze set of double doors, he couldn't help but remember his promise to Amadeus.

'Um, Daisy?' He asked. 'Should we really battle Gloria?'

'Why not?'

'I promised Mr Wolfgeist that I wouldn't hurt her. I don't wanna hurt his daughter.'

'Actually, if I recall correctly, you didn't promise to not hurt his daughter. You promised that you wouldn't let Ms Gravely hurt her. So, I'm pretty sure that as long as you save her from Hellen, Amadeus won't care. Alternatively, we never said anything about me not hurting her.'

'I agree.' Gooigi said. 'I watched whole thing. Amadeus okay with it.'

That did little to calm Luigi's worries. As they approached the double-doors, the music abruptly stopped with a record scratch. It made Luigi jump and panic for a moment.

'Really?' Daisy remarked. 'It ended before we could get there?'

On the other side of the door was a seemingly empty dance floor. A disco ball with multiple coloured lights hung from the ceiling above the colourful disco floor, which stood on a platform a few feet off the foggy floor. Speakers lined the wall behind the dance floor, each lined with neon blue lights. A turntable stood right in the middle of them, decorated in the same coloured squares as the floor.

'Just when you think it can't possibly get any more 80's,' Daisy said. 'It finds a way.'

Stairs emerged from the edge of the platform, allowing easy access to the dance floor. The final elevator button rested in the middle of the floor, its yellow glow being the only thing to make it visible among the rainbow lights. It beckoned to be picked up.

'Oh no...' Luigi muttered. 'Not again. That has to be a trap.'

'Then I'm gonna go grab it!' Daisy said.

'Wait, no-!'

His warning fell on deaf ears as Daisy charged up the stairs and grabbed the button. Her eyes sparkled at the sight of that beautiful '15'. She glanced around, checking for any sort of ghosts. When nothing came out to attack her, she wiped her brow and sighed in relief.

'Alright, we're good!'

Luigi's feeling of dread skyrocketed, and it soon turned out that it was not unwarranted.

'YO! THE DJ IS UP THIS HOOD NOW, DAWG!'

The voice boomed through the speakers, shaking the stage lights above and hurting Luigi's ears. The soundwaves burst from the speakers and sent Daisy flying backwards.

'WAH!' She yelled.

She landed on the floor right next to Luigi, and muttered several expletives to herself. Luigi rushed to her side and helped her get back up.

'Daisy, Daisy!' He cried. 'Are you okay?'

'WHY ARE YOU WHISPERING?!' Daisy shouted.

Before Luigi could worry about his princess sustaining permanent hearing damage, a ghost emerged from behind the turntable, bopping her head and tail to the beat. The headphones around her neck and her pink dress were nothing compared to her massive red afro. She turned the vinyls and hummed along to her own music. The afro was big enough to cover up her eyes, so our heroes couldn't guess how she knew they were there.

'What's crack-a-lackin', my homies?' She greeted in some sort of incredibly-foreign language. 'I hope you are, like, totes ready for a poppin' fight!'

Luigi, Daisy, and Polterpup stared at her, and just blinked. It was all they could do with their brains on full focus trying to decipher that.

'Do you have any idea what she just said?' Daisy asked.

'I... have no idea.' Luigi said. 'Maybe they spoke like that in the era she lived in?'

The DJ ghost took no notice of their confusion, and giggled. 'This cool dawg is DJ Phantasmagloria! But you can, like, totes just call me Gloria. What brings you home boys here to ma rockin' crib?'

It took a few seconds for them to comprehend that particular question.

'OH!' Daisy said. 'You're asking why we're here. See, we're here for that elevator button of yours.'

Gloria shook her head with a punctual 'uh-uh'. 'No can do, home fries! My boss thinks that would totes be a major bummer. She'll, like, flip her wig over that! Do you see what I'm, like, sayin' dudes?'

'Uh... okay. What's stopping us from just swiping the button now?'

Gloria laughed. 'Cos we got a totes boppin' shindig about ta go down! Ya dig?'

The button began to seemingly float into the air to the tune of the music on its own, before a Goob emerged from thin air and revealed himself to be holding it. He wore a red hoodie just like those of the Goobs in the graffiti, and hoisted his hoodie over his eyes to shield them from the Strobulb.

'Sorry about her incomprehensive slang, guys.' The Goob said, tucking the button into his pocket. 'But she means it. And I'm not the only one here.'

Six other Goobs, wearing matching red hoodies, popped out of the floor and stood behind the first guy, bopping their heads to the beat of Gloria's jams. Weirdly enough, all their hoodies came with legs, despite the ghosts themselves lacking them. Daisy opened her mouth to comment on the set-up, before the Goobs all simultaneously performed a bizarre dance move. It involved one arm being bent across the chest and the other being fully extended outwards parallel to the first, with their faces being buried inside the bent elbow. Luigi thought it looked like some sort of overly-exaggerated sneeze, but found the pose familiar to him all the same.

Daisy groaned. 'Oh my god... they're freaking dabbing?'

'Um, what's dabbing?' Luigi asked.

'Just one of the most overused and outdated dance moves of today. I'm so glad you've never tried doing it.'

Luigi laughed nervously and blushed. Okay, it looked a lot lamer than he thought it did when he did it during that Rabbid infestation, and now knowing what it was called made him feel even dumber. The Goobs, after ending that particularly silly move, proceeded to continue with a surprisingly-well synchronised dance. The six in the back divided themselves into two groups of three, mimicking the moves of the other group but mirrored. The one at the front did his own thing that somewhat resembled the 'popping moves' of his backup guys.

The moves involved a lot of spinning, flipping, that odd 'dabbing' move some more... all quite spectacular considering their lack of legs. Then again, it was probably their lack of legs that made the dance moves so easy to begin with. They timed their moves to the music, making it all the more impressive. Gloria's music got a little faster and a whole lot louder.

Daisy rolled her eyes. 'Okay, if you could just give us that button, we'll be...'

Then she noticed something very off. Why was she snapping her fingers to the beat of the tunes? Tried as she might, she couldn't stop her hand from snapping. It was like it had a mind of its own. She only got more worried when she looked down and saw her feet shuffling to the same beat.

'AH!' She yelped. 'W-Why am I dancing?!'

'Uh, D-Daisy?'

Luigi was no better. He had fallen victim to whatever the heck was going on too, and much to Daisy's envy his shuffling was much better than hers. There was only concern in his eyes - Daisy's was more a terrified/annoyed combo. Not even the Polterpets were spared. Polterpup hopped up and down on his hindlegs, while Polterkitty bopped her head like a happy bird while swaying her three tails to the rhythm.

'Someone mind telling me what the heck is going on?!' Daisy demanded, trying and failing to use her other hand to stop the snapping.

Gloria laughed. 'Take a chill pill, dudes. That's, like, how my bopping tunes work! I can, like, totes force my home fries to boogie down if I want to. Dig it?'

'I don't even know what the heck 'dig it' means, but the answer is no!'

The 'bopping' DJ didn't care about their less-than-enthusiastic responses, and certainly not the death glare Polterpup was giving her. The Goobs danced on like nothing had even happened, giggling like schoolchildren at the poor mortals being forced to dance against their will.

'Oh my god...' Daisy said, anger dripping from her words. 'I wanted to go dancing with my sweetie, but definitely not like this!'

'Sucks to be you now, doesn't it!' The Goob at front said, snickering.

Just about the only thing that didn't suck about this situation was the music. It, as Gloria herself would probably say, really 'bopped, homie'. It was like some sort of catchy hip-hop remix of the VB ringtone. That didn't really mean much when said 'bopping tune' was causing them to dance out of their control.

'Kitty, be honest with me.' Daisy said. 'Is this one of those 'dance until you literally drop dead' kind of deals?'

The Panthergeist responded with a nervous grin, which definitely answered Daisy's question. Not that it made her any happier about it.

'Lemme give you the deal here, dudes!' Gloria said, playing her music loud enough to worsen Luigi's headache. 'You'll be dancin' to ma popping beats forever until you dawgs prove yourselves to be better dancers than ma posse!'

Daisy groaned. 'Really? What kinda win condition is that?'

'The most tubular kind, dudes!'

Our heroes watched the dancing Goobs showing off their skills, caring none for the laws of gravity. Whether it was the moonwalk, or the worm, or even krumping, they nailed every move and abused the fact they had no real legs to hold them down. The one at the front seemed especially intent on showing off.

'Luigi, can I be honest with you?' Daisy asked. 'I have no idea how to dance. Like, I can showboat, but that's it. Other than that, I dance like a drunk sailor. Please tell me you're secretly a master dancer.'

Luigi narrowed his eyes at the showboating Goobs. Their dancing taunted him, like a school bully beckoning for some sort of retaliation. And, as much as he didn't want to, he was taking the bait. With the stink eye of a shooter in an old western film, he slid the Poltergust off his back and handed it to Daisy.

'Sweetie, what are you doing?' Daisy asked, rather apprehensive.

'If they want a dance-off,' He said with complete seriousness. 'Then I'm gonna give them one.'

Still shuffling his feet and snapping his fingers, he walked up the stairs and arrived on the dance floor. All the Goobs stopped their moves and turned to him, keeping their eyes hidden from his confounded Strobulb. The music came to a stop, further emphasising his arrival. The forced dancing affecting our heroes stopped as well, much to Daisy's relief.

'I'm here to challenge you.' Luigi said, staring all the ghosts down.

The front Goob laughed. 'Really? You? You're so clumsy you trip over blades of grass. What chance do you have at beating us and our awesome dance moves?'

'You'd be surprised.' He glanced back at Gloria. 'DJ, hit it.'

Gloria shrugged, and played some more music. This was a different tune that didn't affect Luigi with its forced-shuffling capabilities, but still had a catchy beat to it nonetheless. Luigi tapped his foot against the floor to the tune. Meanwhile, the rest of his little group returned to the forced-dancing.

'DAMNIT!' Daisy yelled.

'Didn't you guys see me when I won those gold medals at the Olympics?' Luigi asked. 'Surely you heard that I got the world record in high jump. I have quite the victory dance.'

The front Goob scoffed. 'I'd like ta see you try!'

Daisy buried her face in her hands and groaned. As much as she adored everything about that man, she did not want to see a guy as clumsy as him trying to prove something on the dance floor.

'Alright.' Luigi said. 'You asked for it.'

He got on the floor, and did the one dance move that he knew he could do - breakdancing. And my sweet Luvbi, did he breakdance. He spun his entire body around on just one hand, constantly switching between the left and the right as he spun around like a vinyl on high speed. The Goobs' jaws - and Daisy's jaw too - fell so far they nearly broke. Luigi kept the flawless breakdancing up long enough to convince the whole lot of them that he was not a human but instead some sort of dancing machine.

'You... you can do that?!' Daisy exclaimed, like she had never seen his victory dance at the Olympics.

Just to further show off his skills, he moved from spinning around on the floor to twirling about on a one-handed handstand in one quick movement that was smoother than melted butter, so quickly that a single blink was all that was needed to miss it. Despite the dizziness taking over his mind, he kept on spinning until he knew that he had it in the bag. When he thought he did it long enough, he sprung off the floor and landed on his feet with the precision of a cat.

'Your move, ghosties.' He said.

The Goobs - and Daisy - stared at him, totally stunned. The music had come to an abrupt stop too. The Goob out in front regained his composure and laughed.

'So?' He asked. 'We can do that and more!'

'Yeah, but can you do it with these?' Luigi asked, pointing at his legs.

The crowd stared at him in silence. The front Goob in particular stammered out something incoherent, before he gritted his teeth and clenched his fists. He turned to his posse for their support, but they didn't seem to be in the mood to give him any.

'Um, he's got a point there.' One of the Goobs in the back said.

'SHUT UP, STEVE!' He sighed. 'Fine! I'd hate to admit it, but doing something like that with legs? Oh, heck no! We admit defeat...'

Daisy stepped onto the floor and grinned. 'Now give us that button.'

The Goob shrugged. 'Sorry missy, but I'm afraid that isn't possible. You just won the first phase.'

Daisy's eye twitched. The Goobs vanished into thin air, throwing the button between themselves before tossing it towards their 'boss'. Gloria grabbed onto the button as it soared past her, and stuffed it into a pocket. The princess wanted to ask how dangerous a DJ could possibly be, but experience told her she could be dangerous in about fifty different ways.

In a move that seemed impossible, Gloria lifted her afro up from her eyes, revealing them for the world to see. She winked at out heroes with a cheeky smile.

'Now you're some really rockin' dudes!' She yelled. 'You are, like, totes boppin' to the-!'

It was then that she finally got a good look at Luigi and Daisy, and only now did she recognise them. Her expression of blissful excitement twisted into blind fury.

'Wait a minute... you dawgs ain't some ghostly home fries. You're those totes grody mortals who hurt my Daddy-O!'

Daisy did a double-take. 'You... you didn't know that until now?'

'That's totes uncool! What did my Daddy-O do to you?'

It didn't take Luigi long to realise that she was talking about Amadeus Wolfgeist, clearly just as protective over him as he was over her. Like the pianist before her, her aura shifted from a soft orange to an intense red. She slammed her fists into her turntable, sending the vinyls on it flying.

'Your grody abuse of ma Daddy-O is totes wack!' She yelled. 'I'm gonna, like, learn you lesson for messin' with ma home skillets!'

'Awesome.' Daisy said. 'Now in English.'

'I need to tell the professor to give the translator an extra language...' Luigi murmured.

Just like her father down on floor four, Gloria did not settle with fighting our heroes head on. She followed in her father's footsteps, and jumped into her instrument. This time, it was her turntable.

Polterkitty's eyes widened. 'Oh no...'

'Do I want to know?' Luigi asked.

'I've never seen her do this before.' Polterkitty explained. 'She usually just jumps on the dance floor and takes mortals out directly.'

'Oh no... then she must be really mad at us...'

A red aura exuded from not just the turntable but the speakers too. The voice coils of half of the speakers moved to the sides of the diaphragms and 'stared' directly at our heroes like they were eyes, glowing red like ghostly eyes too.

'Oh god!' Daisy yelped.

That was not the end of it, because why would it be? The other half of the speakers sprouted what appeared to be plastic teeth and roared like a massive beast. Instead of an animalistic roar, the sound that came out was a disjointed mess of notes vaguely resembling disco music. It was so ear-drum-shatteringly loud that both Luigi and Daisy had to cover their ears, and it still wasn't sufficient in blocking out most of the sound. Polterpup and Polterkitty wanted to disappear to the Moon Kingdom until this fight was over, but stayed with the green man.

'I think 'really mad' is an understatement!' Daisy cried.

The two vinyls moved themselves back into place on the turntable, and stood on their sides to resemble eyes. Like the bins that had been possessed by pink spirit balls, the 'lid' of the turntable opened and revealed more teeth. It looked just like the piano beast after Amadeus possessed his instrument, but with a disco twist. And yes, that is a sentence I just had to narrate.

'You think you can just chill in ma crib after you messed with ma Daddy-O?' Gloria's voice boomed from the speakers. 'Get bent!'

She opened her 'mouth' and, like her father, spewed out objects from her throat. Instead of lit bombs, however, rapidly spinning vinyls came out instead. They spun around with the speed of a buzz saw. They flew across the room, aiming for the heads of the mortals.

'AHHH!' They screamed at once.

They ducked out of the way just in time, emphasis on 'just'. Daisy saw, to her horror, strands of her hair falling to the floor. Luigi noticed that one of the curls in the back of her hair was now missing, or more correctly on the ground. Polterpup chuckled at her, but stopped when Luigi glared at him.

'Not to be one of those stereotypical women who freak out when they chip a nail or whatever,' Daisy said. 'But I'm really pissed off now!'

'I think you look great anyway.' Luigi said, genuinely.

'Of course you would.'

Polterkitty cringed. Knowing Gloria as well as she did, she had a feeling that cutting Daisy's hair like that was not entirely an accident. The DJ did not settle with merely cutting hair, and fired her vinyls off again. Luigi and Daisy jumped out of the way, and Luigi nearly had a heart attack when one of them passed by his face and missed his eyes by just an inch. Gloria fired off another round, intent of causing at least a scratch.

Polterkitty got between the turntable and the mortals, and slashed the vinyls to pieces. What remained of them was nothing but dust which made the Panthergeist sneeze quite heartily.

'Whatcha doin', Cool Cat?' Gloria demanded. 'You think you can go over to the flip side like that?'

'ROWWARR!'

Daisy groaned. 'We're not gonna get anywhere if we just sit here and dodge her attacks all night. We gotta make a move!' She crackled her knuckles. 'I'm going in.'

She took one step forward, but Gloria had other plans. She spewed out more vinyls, but these were not used as buzz saws. The spinning records of death created a wall between Daisy and the turntable, and spun around so fast they began to catch on fire. The princess gulped, and tried to calculate the chances of her making the jump over. She decided it was not worth the risk.

'H-How do we force her out?!' Luigi asked. 'With Amadeus, he threw bombs at us. What are we supposed to do with spinning records?!'

'We destroy them, that's what!' Daisy yelled. 'Scatter these dang things with a burst!'

Luigi obeyed her order, ran to her side, and activated a burst. The surge of air threw the vinyls into the air and back into the floor, where they exploded into shards and burning dust. The dust scattered throughout the air.

'Now we can actually-!' Daisy tried to say, only to be interrupted by a sneezing fit.

The dust in the air was worst than anything that either mortal had encountered before. It sent them both into a fit of sneezing, so intense they could barely even stand up, and made their eyes water so badly that they could barely see anything. The ghostly animals didn't fare any better. Luigi and his animal friends ran out of the dust cloud, but Daisy tried her hardest to stand her ground.

'W-What the heck is... i... ah... AAH-CHOOO! ... is this stuff?!' She asked, wiping her watery eyes.

She gave up on trying brave the dust, and joined her teammates on the foggy floor instead. The Polterpets dealt with it just fine, but Luigi was still sneezing into his elbow. And quite violently too.

'Wonderful. Just wonderful.' Daisy said with the most sarcasm that night. 'It's either get our limbs cut off or sneeze ourselves to death. What the heck are we supposed to be able to do?!'

Luigi finally got a moment to breath. 'We can't take her on if we're sneezing so much, but I don't think we can do anything otherwise.'

'That weird dust makes my eyes water like crazy! It's damn near impossible to see anything, and for all we know there could be a vinyl waiting to cut our heads off! Do you think the diplomatic route could work?'

He whimpered. 'It didn't work so well for Amadeus when he was really angry until we disarmed him. If Gloria is nearly as angry as he was, I don't think I'll be able to get to her.'

Gloria, not one to back down, launched more vinyls that flew out of the dust cloud. Luigi and Daisy had just enough time to avoid them, and as they soared over their heads they cut right through the wall and disappeared. The speakers unleashed another deafening cry of anger, this one loud enough to get Luigi to cry out in pain.

Daisy grinded her teeth. 'Okay, now she's REALLY starting to piss me off! First she makes my Luigi sneeze up a storm, and now she's trying to deafen him. I'm not gonna stand for it!'

'But how are we going to stop her?' Luigi asked. 'We don't have any bombs to deflect back at her, and the records are too dangerous to even touch! I... I don't think we have anything to use against her!'

Luigi's breathing got tense and heavy, enough to make himself feel light-headed. He knew this feeling all too well - any second now, he could have another meltdown just like the one he had in the museum. He backed away, not wanting to get Daisy caught up in this one. The princess didn't know whether to approach him and calm him down or leave him alone.

'Big bro still has me.' Gooigi said.

The voice of his gooey counterpart distracted Luigi from the torment at hand for a moment.

'Gooigi...' He murmured. 'Gooigi! Daisy, I have an idea!'

'I'm all ears to hear it, sweetie!'

While Luigi and Daisy had their little discussion, Polterpup and Polterkitty worked together to keep the dangerous records away from their mortal friends. Polterkitty cringed as one sliced into her chest - it left no mark on her ghostly skin, but it still hurt nonetheless.

'I think I know what we can do!' Luigi declared. 'We won't be able to get to Gloria without sneezing to death or getting cut to ribbons, but I think that Gooigi can! The saws might just pass through his body harmlessly, and I don't think that the dust will make him sneeze either.'

Daisy smiled. 'Oh my god, that's a brilliant plan! That's why you're our idea guy. But what is he gonna do by the time he gets to her?'

Luigi did not have an answer to that, but fortunately Gooigi did.

'Big bro remember when big bro used me to jam dinosaur's jaws? Do the same with Gloria! I jam her jaws, so she can't shoot records anymore.'

Luigi gasped, and grinned. 'That's a great idea!' He paused. 'Are you okay with doing that?'

'Was okay with it when I did it to dinosaur. I will always be okay to do it, just for big bro. It doesn't hurt me at all. I don't feel pain that much. I can do it. For big bro.'

The plumber inhaled slowly. 'Okay. If you want to do it, do it.'

Gooigi deployed himself, snapping his fingers to the music even though he wasn't being compelled to. With the Polterpets still guarding the mortals from the vinyls, Gooigi walked up the steps between them and onto the dance floor. Oh, how that gooey man loved music - it was one of the first audio stimuli he had ever got to experience, after all. The speaker-eyes stared at him alone.

'Who's this grody dude?' Gloria asked. 'He can, like, totes gag me with a spoon.'

She fired just one vinyl aimed for his neck. He continued walking forward like it wasn't there at all, even when it cut his neck and his head fell to the floor. Luigi and Daisy gasped in horror, but Gooigi kept on chugging. In seconds, his decapitated head dissolved into a puddle of goop and reformed drop by drop on his neck. The possessed turntable gasped, and realised in horror that she had no water nearby.

Still refusing to give up, she returned to creating a wall of spinning death between her and the gooey man. Though Gooigi did not feel like getting turned into a green slimy milkshake, he wouldn't stop moving. He dislodged the records into the air using his own bursting Poltergoo, and much to Gloria's terror the resulting dust clouds didn't affect him at all. He didn't even need to see through it when he could see her ghostly aura clear as day.

'How are you, like, doing that?!' Gloria demanded. 'That's, like, totes not cool dude!'

She spat out the vinyls in a rapid-fire manner. One shot from her 'mouth' every second, but none could stop Gooigi. They sliced off a hand, a leg, his head again, even the Poltergoo itself, but he acted like they didn't even exist.

Gloria growled. 'That's, like, totes not tubular! You're, like, ruinin' my groove. If I can't, like, cut you to pieces, I'll just chomp ya to pieces instead!'

If Gooigi had a mouth, he would've smiled. The turntable opened her 'jaws' up wide, and Gooigi gladly tossed himself inside. Luigi cringed as he was reduced to a pile of goop, regardless of his constant reassuring words. Gloria chomped him into mush, and only then did she realise what a bad idea that was.

'Oh...'

Though she could still speak thanks to talking through the speakers instead of her 'mouth', with the goop shutting her 'mouth' shut she couldn't fire out any more spinning projectiles. Seeing that Daisy was approaching her all the same, she screamed out in rage through her speakers. Daisy stood her ground, even though the soundwaves were as powerful as a gale.

'GLORIA!' She shouted over the disjointed music. 'If you don't get out here right now, I'm gonna hafta smash your turntable to smithereens!'

'Didn't ya hear me, sucker? You hurt ma Daddy-O!'

The sound of whimpering managed to hit Daisy's ears. She turned her head and saw Luigi leaning up against the wall, clamping his hands over his ears as tight as he could. Polterpup and Polterkitty yowled, which didn't help him at all.

'Okay, that's it...' The princess muttered.

The lights on her Phantasma-Gloves glowed just as bright as they did during the fight with the faux king, and she pushed against the mighty soundwaves. She could hear Gloria's voice growing hoarse, but the DJ did not stop screaming. Daisy cared none for it, and kept on walking.

'GET OUT OF MA PAD, YA FLOOZY!'

Daisy had no idea what 'floozy' could've possibly meant, but she knew it wasn't a compliment. She didn't stop until she got within arm's reach of the turntable. Once there, she picked up the two vinyls on it and smashed them to pieces in her hands. The screaming from the speakers stopped, replaced with a tearful gasp. Daisy truly did not want to ruin something that Gloria was clearly so passionate about, but if this 'vacation' had taught her anything it was that feelings didn't mean anything in a battle.

So, she lifted up her fists and slammed them into the turntable with a mighty yell.

'NO!' Gloria yelled.

With how powered-up the gloves were, the turntable was reduced to nothing but a pile of dust on the floor the moment Daisy bashed it. The pieces scattered everywhere as plastic and glass shards went flying. One of the shards sliced Daisy's forehead as it flew up, but she was too hyped on adrenaline to notice. Once the dust settled, all that remained of the possessed turntable was the shattered debris and a dazzled DJ ghost in the middle of it, allowing Gooigi to return home.

Daisy was about ready to punch the ghost herself, but Gloria was never one to lay down for more than a few seconds. She got to her 'feet' like nothing had ever happened, and pulled two vinyls out of her wig and held them like ninja stars. The princess jumped back and swore to herself - of course the battle wasn't over yet.

Gloria gritted her teeth, and hid her eyes behind her afro. 'You dudes think you can just, like, mosey on into ma crib? You're totes worse than the fuzz! You're really crusin' for a bruisin' now!'

Daisy jumped away, knowing full well that this could only spell trouble. Gloria held onto her last two records and spun around like a toy top, putting Chef Soulfflé's spinning back in the restaurant to shame. The edges of her vinyls glowed red hot, so much so that tiny embers and smoke emitted from them. Daisy gave her a nervous smile and immediately turned around to run away.

Luigi, on the other hand, was sick of having to sit out of this battle and rejoined his princess on the battlefield. Before he could regret his decision - which he was doing very quickly as those red-hot vinyls got very close to his eyes - Polterpup hopped onto the stage and stopped her spinning by just grabbing onto one of the vinyls.

Gloria did not approve. 'Let go of that, ya mutt!'

Polterpup yanked on the record and growled like a guard dog defending his territory. Gloria snarled at him, and simply let go of the vinyl for him. He went flying backwards until he crashed into one of the seats.

'Boy!' Luigi cried.

'Alright honey,' Daisy said, putting her hands on her hips. 'Give us that final button and we'll leave!'

'No way José!' The disc jockey yelled. 'Not after you totes wrecked ma rockin' turntable and hurt ma Daddy-O. I'm not letting a coupla squares like you defeat me, especially when I'm, like, the last home fry left!'

With just one vinyl to work with, she wound it up and aimed directly for Daisy's neck. After all, she only needed to bring Luigi back alive. The orange chick could burn in hell for all she cared. Daisy yelped, and held up her hands in defence. The edges of the vinyl harmlessly clanked against the Phantasma-Gloves, so now Gloria aimed for her legs instead. Luigi reacted fast, and activate a burst right at the ghost's 'feet'.

What happened next was not quite what any hero was expecting, with the exception of Polterkitty.

'AH!' Gloria shrieked.

Her massive afro fell to the floor.

'That... that was a wig?!' Daisy exclaimed.

Gloria's hands shot for her head. With her gigantic wig gone, it revealed her real hair beneath it. It was nothing like the impressive afro; not even close. All that remained on her head was very, very short brown hair. It wasn't even on the level of a buzzcut, and compared to her wig on the floor it seemed even shorter.

'No...' Gloria muttered. 'No no NO!'

In that moment, the confident DJ Phantasmagloria forgot about the battle with the mortals all together. She covered her short hair in shame, not even looking our heroes in the eye. Polterkitty felt sorry for the poor thing.

'Y-You weren't supposed to see that!' She pleaded. 'My real hair is totes grody!'

Luigi and Daisy stepped back. With how much she was driven to cut them to ribbons, this sudden attitude change seemed all the more jarring. Polterpup pitied her too much to laugh about it.

'What is up with her?' Daisy asked.

Polterkitty sauntered onto the dance floor, quietly as to not disturb the distressed DJ. 'Mro-ooo-oow.'

Luigi gasped. 'Oh! Polterkitty says that's as long as her hair ever grew when she was alive, cos of a condition of some kind. She buys those wigs to cover it up.'

'Oh, what?!'

Daisy put everything aside for just a moment, and looked upon the crying ghost. It made her shudder - it was like looking into a mirror, and she hated it. Judging by Luigi's eyes, he felt just the same.

'What are you talking about, Gloria?' Luigi asked. 'Your hair looks just fine. It's okay to prefer wearing a wig, but you shouldn't feel ashamed of your real hair.'

The distressed disc jockey began to weep. 'O-Oh, my foozy of a boss was totes right. I'm, like, pathetic to the max.'

'What?! No you're not. You nearly killed the both of us! What are you saying?'

Gloria sniffled and wiped her eyes. 'S-She only gave me this final button because she thought you would defeat me easily. After what you did to my Daddy-O, I wanted to prove her wrong. Now I-I can't even... even...' She wailed. 'I just can't even!'

Luigi knelt down to her level and put his hand on her shoulder. To his surprise, his hand did not pass through her skin. She flinched, but otherwise did not react.

'I-I just wanna see my Daddy-O again...' She growled. 'If my Daddy-O was here, he'd give you both a knuckle sandwich.'

'Oh, trust me.' Daisy said. 'He nearly did. He almost killed us! And maybe gave me post-piano-stress disorder.'

'Post-piano-what?'

'The point is, we've dealt with your father. And he was absurdly powerful. He nearly killed us both, and only because your boss claimed that we hurt you somehow.'

The mention of her father made her gasp. Thinking about her boss, she forgot about her sadness and returned to being angry. She did not direct her anger at our heroes this time, however.

'That wench! It's totes her fault! How could she, like, tell my Daddy-O that you hurt me? She knows how much that, like, terrifies him!'

She thought back on the day that she first met Amadeus Wolfgeist. She had thought she had been released from the hospital, but she soon found out the hard way that she had succumbed to her illness. If only she knew that her bed-hopping habits could hurt her so much... but when that old pianist saw her all alone, her afterlife had no doubt changed for the better.

'Grrr... if that wench thinks she can mess with my dad, she's gonna totes be proven wrong!' She turned to our heroes. 'If you dudes can remove her from our crib, I'll consider you a coupla homies. Think you can, like, do that?'

'That's been our goal, Gloria.' Luigi said. 'After she took my brother away from me, Daisy and I have promised to take her down. Not just for ourselves, but for you and your friends too.'

'Wait... does that, like, mean you didn't wanna hurt us?'

'I never wanted to hurt you, but your boss has forced me too. If you accept, we can send you back into the vault without hurting you anymore. We just need that button before you go.'

That seemed to brighten her spirit, pun not intended. She yanked out that fifteenth button and tossed it at our heroes. Daisy caught it after fumbling for a bit. Gloria picked up the nozzle of the Poltergust, and aimed it at her face.

'So, how do you, like, work this thingy?' She asked.

She pressed one of the buttons at random, which so happened to be the suction button. In other words, she accidentally captured herself, to which our heroes did not complain. After all, that made things much easier.

'I kinda liked her.' Gooigi said. 'Seemed nice.'

Luigi and Daisy stared at the button in the latter's hands. It seemed like a dream that they would soon wake up from. The final button was right there, in their grasp. They couldn't believe that this nightmare only had one more floor to go.

Daisy gulped. 'You ready, Sweetie?'

Luigi shook his head. 'We should definitely have another rest first. Lord knows what the heck we're gonna encounter.'

'I second that.' She sighed, a little joyously. 'But you know what? I'm kinda happy. While all the Goobs and stuff are still unaccounted for, I think we're saved all these Grand Ghosts. We're freed them, Luigi. How does that make you feel?'

Luigi smiled. That was all the answer she needed. The quintet - we're counting Gooigi now - headed back for the elevator. Most of them were relieved at the mere thought of ending this nightmare, but Polterkitty was not so excited to return to the penthouse.

In fact, she dreaded it.


Amadeus waited by the vault entry, ignoring the rest of the world around him. Johnny was ecstatic to be reunited with his boyfriend, and Amadeus was very happy for him, but the old pianist had a very special someone he was waiting for.

'Come on...' He muttered. 'Beeile dich, Luigi! Sag mir von Gloria ist okay!'

Everyone else was with their loved ones, and Amadeus couldn't be more proud of everyone reuniting again. The Hayseed twins were already up to playing tricks with the Twisted Sisters on Chambrea, who had threatened to kill them not just a second time but a third as well.

'GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!' Chambrea screamed at Ginny, who just got done with painting her face rainbow.

'You'll have ta make me, ya bloody w-'

'Call me a 'wanker' one more time, and I will rip you to shreds!'

Clem chuckled. 'Like y'all would ever hurt a child!' He paused. 'Ackshully... Ah think ya would.'

William and Serpci continued spouting their sickeningly sweet similes at each other, to which Johnny and Steward could both agree was far too much.

Johnny rolled his eyes at the sweetheart couple. 'Can you imagine if we talked to each other like that, dude? That would be totally obnoxious.'

Steward chucked. 'Oh, my lovey-dovey-wovey honey!'

Johnny gave him a playful shove. 'Stewy!'

Fishook, meanwhile, had joined Chambrea in her bashing-of-the-wall. He didn't think it would actually get him out, but he found slashing his hook against the wall to be quite fun. His ghostly animal crew had joined him in their special chamber, and were enjoying themselves following his lead.

'Amadeus worried, Ug see.' Ug said as he joined his best friend's side. 'Ug understand worry. Amadeus love daughter very much.'

Amadeus sighed. 'Please Ug, you don't need to do the simplistic speech around me. I thought we agreed you wouldn't do that anymore. I mean, if you want to, that is fine.'

'I do apologise, my musical chap.' Ug spoke in his true speech. 'It's a habit of mine, you see. I just like to make sure that other ghosts and the like get my point as quickly as possible. I do often forget that you do not need that.'

'Yes, that is just fine, my dear friend. I'm just waiting for my sweet Gloria, but I'm sure you already know that.'

Ug's attention drifted to the maid ghost. When she wasn't making Lindsey cry and being apathetic about it, she continued to insult the green-clad man like it was still just a few minutes since he 'stole' 'her' briefcase.

'Is Chambrea still under Hellen Gravely's mind control?' Ug asked. 'I do believe that the ghost-proof walling of both inside and outside this vault not only keeps us in, but keeps Ms Gravely's mind tricks out.'

'If you want me to be honest,' Amadeus replied. 'I don't think she was ever under Ms Gravely's control to begin with. Our boss barely remembers that our maid friend even exists anymore. I'm certain that Chambrea was just being her usual overly-aggressive self.'

'Ah. Of course. Many mortal lives were lost thanks to her alone. You'd think our boss would give her recognition for that. Or at least money. Yet, she most likely doesn't pay her on purpose.'

It seemed like hours had passed since that conversation, when in reality it was just a few seconds, until the final ghost dropped into the vault. Amadeus recognised her before she even stopped tumbling.

'Gloria!' He cried. 'My precious Gloria!'

He rushed into an embrace, holding her as close as he could manage, like he could lose her again at any moment. It took her by surprise, but she quickly returned the hug.

'I was so worried...' He said. 'After Johnny told us that Hellen was starting to get rid of us one by one, I... I worried that she may have gotten you.' Tears flowed from his eyes, and he made no effort to hide it. 'I've lost so many children, Gloria. I-I did not want you to be another one.'

Gloria giggled. 'Don't worry, Daddy-O! That ol' floozy'll never keep me down.'

'Luigi did not hurt you at all, did he? More than was necessary, at least?'

'Nope! That rockin' green cat was totes cool! Even when it came to my... grody hair.'

Amadeus hadn't even noticed that her wig was missing, but he did not care. The other ghosts left the two alone, congregating in another part of the massive room away from them. After all, Amadeus needed time to let it sink in that his precious daughter had been returned to him. Except for Chambrea - she would never stop trying to bash her way out. Fishook's crew stayed behind with her, just for the fun of it.

'What do we do now?' Kruller asked. 'Wit' da green bud climbin' up to our boss's office, what can we do?'

'Yeah!' Steward said. 'I'm sick of just sitting here and fighting among ourselves. We gotta do something!'

They all turned to Serpci, their obligatory leader. The pharaoh ghost flinched, and cleared her throat.

'I am sorry, my friends.' She said. 'But I do not know what we can possibly do now.'

'Ghosts locked inside vault.' Ug explained. 'Maybe tell Green Man to free us, but Ug don't think Green Man will listen.'

'Fair dinkum, mate?' Fishook remarked. 'You seriously think Green Man wouldn't free us? I'm more concerned about the orange sheila and that professor guy. I doubt they'll just let us out.'

'So we just have to sit here while that green kid gets himself killed?' Ginny asked. 'You bloody kidding?! I don't care what that smart-ass wanker says - I'm gonna demand he frees us!'

Chef Gordon sighed. 'You idiots... do you not see zat we are safer in here? We could become victims to Ms Gravely's mind control if we are freed.'

Lindsey gasped. 'We can't have that! I don't want you guys to hurt him... I don't want ME to hurt him!'

The ghostly crowd fell into silence. They wanted to ask their pianist friend what he recommended, but they did not want to interrupt his sweet bonding time with his daughter. They seemed too calm and joyful to talk to at the moment.

Dr Potter groaned. 'I don't know why the lot 'o yeh are even tryin'. We're not gittin' out of this blasted jail, and yeh just gotta deal with it!'

'I art not willingeth to siteth 'ere and leteth the green warrior and his maiden die!' William MacFrights cried. 'As a king, I musteth not leteth me friends geteth themselves killedeth! T'is not right.'

'This is totally bogus, dudes.' Johnny said, sighing. 'It's either chill in here and do nothing, or allow ourselves to get our minds totally messed with. It's lose-lose.'

While most of the ghosts wondered what the heck they could possibly do, Ug found himself looking over at Chambrea. She had thoroughly bruised her whole body at this point, but was refusing to give up. It didn't surprise anyone, but Ug began to wonder if maybe - just maybe - she was on the right track.


DJ PHANTASMAGLORIA, THE EXCITABLE DISCO STAR

AGE - 18

GENDER - Female

CAUSE OF DEATH - An unknown illness

Gloria was quite the popular DJ back in the 80's, until a mysterious illness did her in. Her mind has been stuck in the 80's ever since, hence her occasional use of incomprehensible slang. Compared to the others, she hasn't been a ghost for very long. In fact, she might not entirely realise she is a ghost...


Author Notes - Oh my god, Gloria's dialogue hurts my brain. With her, I was trying to parody the overuse of slang to look cool by making her dialogue over-the-top insane and outdated. It's meant to reflect the fact that she died so recently compared to the other ghosts that her mind is still stuck in the 80's. So if you think the slang is painfully outdated, that's the joke.

Oh, and Gloria's time of death and the whole 'unknown illness' thing is, uh... look, I don't shy away from reality.

Also, I'm starting to think I might have hypergraphia, which is more-or-less a very intense urge to write or draw. Or it could just be a side-effect of my hyperlexia. Both are possibilities.


Gloria Glitter Glamour (yes, that's her full name) raised concerns with her parents when her hair didn't seem to grow. Turns out she was physically incapable of growing it out anymore, and her body hair didn't grow at all. Her self-esteem went out the window, so she bought a few dozen afro wigs to cover up what she believed to be an awful deformity.

Gloria, being DJ Phantasmagloria, didn't let it stop her from partying down. Her popularity got her, um, lots of bed time with various men. Then panic about a new disease went viral... at the same time Gloria herself was diagnosed with it. It killed her immune system, and thanks to the overwhelming panic surrounding the illness at the time no one came to visit her except her grief-stricken parents.

Thank Jaydes that her 'Daddy-O' met her not long after her departure from her body. If it wasn't for him, she'd still be horrified and confused today. The triplets, Ginny especially, envy her for this.