I know I don't have a large platform, but I still have a platform, so I'm going to use it: Black Lives Matter. There should be nothing controversial about this statement. If you don't agree with it, I encourage you to check your privilege. If you still don't understand, stop reading my stories now because you are not the audience I write for.
So, I don't want to ask that people donate, because I know that there are many factors influencing financial situations at the moment (including but not limited to the covid-19 pandemic), but I encourage you to sign petitions (texting JUSTICE/ENOUGH/FLOYD to 55156 is a good way to start) and to continue educating yourself on the situation at hand as well as on structural racism - especially if you are white and American. If you can donate, by all means do. If you can't, consider watching videos on YouTube where all ad revenue goes to support Black Lives Matter (ex. search "Zoe Amira"). I myself am trying to learn how to better be an ally and address the white privilege I know I experience in my life. It is not enough to "not be racist". We must be anti-racist. I will never understand what is like to be black, but I do understand that silence is violence, which is why I'm including this note here. I might only be a teenager, but I want to do whatever I can to help.
If you'd like more resources, feel free to message me on Tumblr thinkingisadangerouspastime (or just scroll through my recent posts [ignoring queued ones] and/or my "ref" tag). A basic Google search should also turn up a bunch of information/resources, too. The best time to start learning about and fighting against white supremacy and systemic oppression was hundreds of years ago. The second best time is now. Thank you for taking the time to read this.
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"So."
"So."
Rayla gave him a gentle if amused smile. "We're... a thing now."
Callum nodded. "Yep. We're... a thing." His chest flooded with warmth at the thought, despite the lack of a label on the relationship.
They were sitting in a booth at the café where they'd had their first real conversation those many weeks ago. Callum felt it was pretty romantic when he'd suggested they meet up there to discuss their new relationship, but he didn't actually voice that thought aloud. Surely he wasn't allowed to say that on their first... sort-of date. Was he? That would be moving way too fast, wouldn't it?
"I guess we need to..." Rayla seemed to struggle to find the right words. "Talk through our... expectations? What we're looking for?"
"Uh... yes?" Ugh, he sounded too uncertain. "Yes. Yes, agreed. We should do that."
They stared at each other for a moment, then proceeded to burst out laughing.
"Okay, I think we might be putting some unnecessary pressure on ourselves," Rayla said amidst her laughter, wiping a tear from beneath her eye. "Let's - let's try this again. Starting point. Who should we tell, and how?"
Callum nodded, his own laughter slowly dying off. Her question seemed the perfect place to begin. "Claudia and Soren, obviously. I'm pretty sure Claudia is going to lose her mind. Although, they might have already seen us... uh..." He coughed. "You know. At the game."
Rayla rolled her eyes, but he didn't miss her blushing. It was nice to know she was as new to all this as he was. "They were probably too caught up in the win to notice, but I agree. We definitely have to tell them."
"I also want to tell Ez," he continued. "And my dad. They… er, expressed their support for me pursuing a relationship with you before I left for the game. It was incredibly embarrassing."
"Aw," Rayla cooed, smiling at him. "That's really sweet."
"Not sweet. Humiliating," he grumbled, earning laughter from his girlfriend.
Girlfriend.
Wow.
Callum cleared his throat. "Anyways. What about you? Do you want to tell Runaan and Ethari?"
Rayla grimaced, and he wondered if he shouldn't have brought them up. "Ah. About that." She sighed, taking a sip of her iced tea. "I don't know. Part of me thinks - or hopes, maybe - that all they'll really care about is if I'm happy with you. Another part of me knows that they might... struggle with the idea. At first. They'd come around eventually."
Callum wondered if she was trying to convince herself as much as she was him, and the thought made his heart ache.
He reached over the table to place his hand on top of hers. "You don't have to tell them yet. We can see how things play out for a while before you make any announcements." He chuckled. "Although, like I said, I think we're legally obligated to tell Claudia and Soren. Claudia will have our heads if we don't."
"You make a solid point there." Rayla then gave him a relieved smile, gratitude flickering in her violet eyes. "Thank you, Callum. You're the best boyfriend a girl - or anyone, really - could ask for." Her face reddened as she realized what she'd said, and she pulled her hand out of his to cover her mouth in embarrassment. "I mean - only if you're okay with me calling you that. You know. Boyfriend."
Callum could feel that his face was as red as hers. "I don't - I don't mind." He then gave her a cheeky grin. "Does that mean I'm allowed to say you're my girlfriend?" The word felt foreign on his tongue, yet saying it aloud was... exhilarating.
Rayla nodded. "Yes. Yes, of course you can." She laughed, though it seemed a little nervous. "Fair is fair, right?"
"Right. Yes. Definitely! Fair is fair."
"Mhm!"
This conversation was beginning to feel very circular. Callum decided it was time for a change in topic. "So... Well, how do you feel about PDA?" That was horrendously articulated. "I mean, how open do you want us to be regarding the rest of the school?" He paused. "Do we plan on telling anyone else at school?"
Rayla shrugged. "Moonshadows don't really lean one way or the other when it comes to PDA, but I'm not going to refuse to hold your hand if you offer, if that makes sense. And the longer we're together I'm sure it will all become... more natural, you know?"
Callum was indescribably thrilled by the implication that she thought they'd be together for a while. He felt that way, too, but he was more than a little anxious - aka completely terrified - to mention it.
"And I don't think we need to keep our relationship a secret, per se," she continued. "We just... won't specifically tell anyone unless they ask. Let people think what they'll think. It's not like it's any of their business in the first place."
Callum chuckled. "Good point." He ate a bite of his macaroon. "To be honest, I don't really know if anyone is actually going to care about - well, about 'us'. People date and break up every other day around here. I'm starting to get the vibe that college is just 'like that'."
"Yeah, but we're kind of social outcasts. Especially me." Rayla tucked her hair behind her ear. "You're going to get even more nasty looks from now on. It's one thing to be friends with the weird Xadian. But dating her?" She gave him a wry smile. "They might call you a traitor to KSU and all of Katolis or something stupid like that."
"Eh. I can take it." He grinned at her. "You're worth it."
Rayla flushed. "Oh my God. You're so embarrassing."
"What, because I want to show some appreciation for my girlfriend?" Callum laughed as she buried her face in her hands. "I'm serious!" He drank some of his coffee. "But I feel like I should be the one warning you. People are probably going to accuse you of dating me in order to..." He trailed off, chewing on his bottom lip as he tried to figure out the right words for what he wanted to explain. "They'll say -"
"That I'm dating you in order to stay in Professor Harrow's good graces?" she supplied, and he nodded. She sighed, shrugging. "I was actually thinking about that the other day. It'll be a pain in the ass, but I don't care. People will make stupid assumptions no matter what."
Ugh. Well, that was so true it hurt. "Yep. But we'll power through it." He smiled at her. "Together."
Rayla nodded. "Together."
They continued discussing the future of their relationship, with Callum saying he would be free for dates most Fridays and Saturdays and Rayla then pointing out that she would have a game basically every Saturday until December if not January. Callum promised to go to all of her home games, though Rayla reassured him that she did not expect him to attend every single home game. Just the important ones.
(He didn't care. He'd go to all of them, anyways. He loved the idea of seeing her in her element - competition.)
Callum mentioned the possibility of him picking her up from a practice or two every week so they could hang out - code: go on a date - without anyone else tagging along, to which his girlfriend readily agreed. And of course they were determined to continue their weekly homework sessions, though Callum had a feeling that now they would be even more prone to distracting each other. And maybe they'd even do a little more than just homework.
No, not that.
"Hey," Rayla said after they'd thrown away their trash and started walking towards the door. "I just realized that you never did give me a tour of campus like you promised."
"I do not recall promising anything," he pointed out, "but… You're right. I never did." Callum nodded his thanks when she held the door open for him as they left the café. "If you're still interested - if you still even need a tour - we can definitely do that." He slipped his hand into hers as they began walking in the general direction of Rayla's next class, feeling much less self-conscious about this decision than he did before they'd set boundaries for physical affection.
Honestly, a campus tour didn't sound like a half-bad date. Or even a series of dates. There'd be plenty of cute places where they could stop and hang out.
"Unfortunately for you, Claudia pretty much did that for me already. But..." Rayla then grinned at him, wiggling her eyebrows mischievously. "I've only left campus like once since arriving in Katolis, for Felix's party. Maybe you could help me sightsee the coolest spots outside of KSU?"
Callum laughed. "Of course. I'll put together an itinerary as soon as possible."
"Pff." Rayla gently shoved him with her shoulder as they were walking. "You dummy. We don't need an itinerary. And it was just a suggestion - we don't have to do that if there's other things you have in mind."
"I know, I know." Callum shrugged. "I just... want to do stuff with you. Any stuff. For as long as we can. Since at the end of the year, you'll have to..." He trailed off, not really wanting to process the thought.
"Leave?" she finished. Her voice was tinged with sadness, and the two slowed to a stop on the sidewalk. "Yeah. I know. I don't want to think about it, either." She squeezed his hand. "So, for now, let's not. It's barely October - my departure is a problem for after the end of football season."
Callum laughed. Only Rayla would use sports as the milestone for her year.
She tapped his nose. "There it is. There's that smile I love to see."
She started to continue walking forward, but Callum pulled her back and stood on his tiptoes to press a hasty kiss to her lips. It was entirely fueled by adrenaline, but when he tried to pull away, Rayla leaned down into it, causing his feet to fall flat to the floor. He wrapped his arms around her to close the space between them.
"You know," he murmured as she broke the kiss, their faces still inches apart, "I could really get used to that."
"Mm. Me too." She gave him a small smile. "It's a good thing I'm not going anywhere."
Callum hesitated, then pushed the future to the back of his mind. All that mattered was the present. The moment they were in.
He returned her smile. "I'd say we're pretty lucky, all in all."
She pressed another soft kiss to his lips. "That we are."
xXxXxXx
"There's something I want to tell you guys."
Callum's words caused both his father and his brother to freeze with their spoons of ice cream halfway to their mouths, and he realized that he probably could have phrased his announcement in a way that inspired less... panic.
"It's nothing bad!" he added hastily. "Honest! I just wanted the two of you to be the first ones we told."
Harrow raised an eyebrow. "'We'?"
Callum nodded. "Me and Rayla." Oh, wow. Rayla would have corrected him. It was 'Rayla and I'.
Harrow sighed. "Callum, if you got her pregnant -"
"What?! God, no!" Callum reached out to cover his brother's ears. "Don't talk about that stuff in front of Ez!"
Ezran rolled his eyes, removing his older brother's hands. "I'm not a kid, Callum. I know about se - wait, sorry, I know about 'the birds and the bees'."
Callum shook his head, ignoring his brother's mocking tone. "Nope. You're still 10 years old to me."
Harrow cleared his throat, regaining the attention of his sons. "Anyways. What were you saying about you and Rayla?"
"Right. Right." Callum pushed his bangs out of his face. "Rayla and I…" It was just a few words! He could do this! "We're dating. And now you get one question each." He didn't know why he was so nervous about saying it out loud. Both his dad and Ezran had already expressed their support regarding his interest in Rayla. In fact, they may have been more enthusiastic than he had, which was saying something.
Maybe it was the weight of the words. The air of permanence that came with them. The expectations, too. He liked Rayla - he liked Rayla so, so much. And right now, it felt like they'd be together forever.
Maybe he was afraid of messing that up.
"Hello? Earth to Callum?"
He blinked upon hearing his name, and his face reddened as he realized that he'd zoned out. "Sorry. Can you - uh, repeat whatever you said?"
Apparently it was Ezran who'd spoken to him, as his younger brother huffed in mock-impatience. "Can't believe you're already daydreaming about her. Young love is a drug." He smirked at Callum's affronted expression. "Anyways, I said that I like Rayla. And I think Rayla is way cooler than you, so I don't know how you won her over."
Callum rolled his eyes. "Gee, thanks."
Ezran laughed. "Okay, but seriously, you two are good for each other. I'm happy for you."
"As am I," Harrow said. He stood and walked around the table, placing a hand on his youngest son's shoulder. "Ezran, do you mind if I had a word with Callum? Privately?"
Ezran appeared suspicious but agreed, grumbling something about he was practically an adult now and therefore should be allowed to stay, though he still begrudgingly left the dining room, his bowl of ice cream in his hands. Harrow then took Ezran's seat next to Callum.
"I want to first say again that I am very happy for you and Rayla." He grinned at his stepson. "One could say that you are each other's better halves."
Callum was tempted to argue, but... Yeah, that sounded about right. Rayla was definitely his better half.
"But I just wanted to make sure that you're prepared for the consequences of being in a relationship with her." Harrow paused, wincing. "'Consequences' is a strong word. What I mean is -"
"That people are going to talk shit about us behind our backs?" Callum supplied. "That there are going to be awful rumors about our relationship flying around? That some people are just flat-out not going to accept us being together?" He tried to offer his dad a reassuring smile. "Rayla and I have already talked about it. We don't care."
Harrow blinked, seemingly stunned and impressed by his son's proclamation. Then he smiled, pride gleaming in his green eyes. "I should have known that the two of you had this discussion already." He squeezed Callum's shoulder. "My only advice for you, then, is to set boundaries and respect them. Treasure her. Support her. And remember: her enemies must become your enemies."
"Her - what?"
"If she dislikes someone or says her gut is telling her not to trust someone, listen. Chances are she knows what she's talking about. Sarai always did."
Callum nodded, not missing how his father's face softened at the mention of his mother. "Will do." He then smirked at his dad. "Got any other parting words of wisdom before you make me go do the dishes?"
Harrow shrugged. "Hmm... Ask for permission and always use protection. Consent is sexy."
Callum now wished he'd kept his mouth shut. "Thanks," he grumbled, his face red. "Really wanted to hear my dad use the word 'sexy' today." Not.
Harrow chuckled, clapping his son on the knee before standing up. "Sorry, sorry. Go do your homework or whatever it is you do in your free time. I'll take care of the dishes." He then disappeared into the kitchen, calling for Ezran to come help him.
Callum didn't know whether to be offended or begrudgingly amused by his stepdad's assumption because, well, he was right.
Just as Callum was about to go to his room and try to finish an assignment for his philosophy elective, his phone buzzed. He hesitated, not wanting to get distracted right before he needed to get work done, but something compelled him to stop and read the message.
Rayla: Brace yourself.
Callum frowned as he reread her text. 'Brace himself'? For what? Rayla seemed to know something he didn't, and it was a little bit terrifying.
His question was answered when his phone began buzzing again, more persistently - an incoming call. From Claudia.
Huh. Rayla must have told her they were dating.
Oh, crap. Rayla must have told her they were dating.
He answered the phone, his hand trembling ever so slightly. "Hello?"
"Callum! You mean to tell me that you and Rayla have been together for three whole days and I was not informed from day one?!"
Callum bit his tongue to keep from laughing. "I don't think I technically told you anything, to be fair."
Wrong thing to say.
"I know!" He winced and pulled the phone away from his ear at her shout of indignation. "That's exactly my point! What kind of friend are you if you don't keep me updated every minute of each major development in your love life?!"
"Erm... A bad one?"
"Damn straight!" She sighed, and Callum could visualize her pinching the bridge of her nose. "Alright. So. Rayla told me the two of you got together last Saturday. When?"
Callum opened and closed his mouth like a goldfish. And not just any goldfish. A confused goldfish. A very important distinction. "Uh. After the game?"
Claudia groaned, and Callum heard familiar laughter in the background of the call. "Okay, but when? Soren and I were with you the entire time! I don't remember any dramatic confessions of love and affection." She paused. "Ooh. That kind of rhymed."
Callum chewed his lip as he tried to articulate an answer. "I mean... In our defense, we weren't trying to hide our... love and affection, or whatever you said. Although we didn't dramatically confess or anything." He laughed. "We were honestly really obvious, but everyone was so caught up in the win that they just weren't paying attention to us. You and Soren were like 10 feet away and you didn't notice."
There was a long pause. In his mind's eye, he could picture Claudia giving him a suspicious glare. "And what, exactly, did Soren and I not notice?"
Callum suddenly got a feeling that he'd said too much. "Uh... nothing?"
Claudia gasped. "Oh my God. You kissed?! And you didn't tell me?!"
"Callum!" he heard Rayla shout in the background. "You didn't need to fill her in on every detail!"
"Oh, he didn't!" Claudia answered for him. "But you are about to!" There was the sound of movement on her end of the line. "Anyways," she continued, once again speaking to Callum, "I'm about to interrogate Rayla, but don't think that means I'm done with you. This conversation will be continued."
Callum didn't have time to protest before she'd hung up. He stood in stunned silence for a moment before he burst out laughing, sticking his phone into his back pocket.
"What's so funny?" Ezran asked, poking his head out of the kitchen, Bait resting atop his hair.
Callum shook his head, still grinning like an idiot. "Nothing. Nothing at all."
xXxXxXx
