Hello! I hope you all are doing well with the lack of Gossip Girl. Now… All the people who pick up on my typos and it drives them crazy, and I just comment how I hate to proof read my work… here is your chance to say "I told you so!" There was a pretty massive typo at the end of the last chapter. I'm gonna see if I can fix it, but I don't know how? Okay… the judge should have said, "This ISN'T over" instead of "This IS over." As you can see… that kinda changes the whole meaning. I was actually thinking about not saying anything, but I hear confession is good for the soul. (Looks at you with big Bambi eyes) Please forgive me! Now, on to the new chapter…

Blair walked slowly into the bathroom as if on a death march. Dorota hovered behind her knowing this was not going to be good. Taking a deep breath Blair steeled her will, flicked her hair off her shoulders, shut her eyes and stepped onto the scale.

"Well?" Blair demanded, her eyes still closed.

Dorota looked down at the number and tried to come up with a way to tell Blair the news without triggering the nuclear reaction, which had been Blair's standard response to bad news lately… or maybe always. This was something Dorota was usually good at, but Hormonal Blair had changed the rules.

"You okay for woman who is having baby in few months."

"131 pounds!" Blair screeched at the scale when she saw the numbers come up.

"Is baby." Dorota commented taking Blair's arm and edging her off the scale so at least the numbers would be gone, and maybe she'd calm down.

"I've read the books! Right now this baby allegedly weighs three pounds! If that's true, then why have I gained 22?"

"Water weight?" Dorota offered.

"This is Chuck's fault! I've never weighed more than 116lbs my whole life. Now? With his baby mutating inside of me? I'm Kirsty Alley. Jenny Craig will be calling me any minute!"

"You want Mr. Chuck's baby, you have Mr. Chuck's baby. You just have no Mr. Chuck. Why don't I make you some hot tea? The one your Papa sent you from Cambodia."

"I don't want tea! I want my thighs back!" Blair paused, her mood changing faster then usual, running her hand over her baby bump. "Besides… the baby wants banana bread French toast with crème fraiche… and a chocolate milkshake."

"Maybe baby want fruit or vegetable every now and then…" Dorota commented but bit her tongue at the look Blair shot her, and then she hurried out of the room to get the food.

She'd just made it to the stairs when she heard a crash and the shatter of glass. Dorota didn't need to guess at the sound since she had a pretty good idea that it was the scale being hurled into the mirror. It was the fourth time this month.

Stepping away from the broken glass in the bathroom, Blair moved into her bedroom and walked into her expansive closet. Slipping off her silk robe she took a dress out and slipped it on. It was a halter and she studied her appearance with her usual criticalness.

"Look at that!" She commanded her reflection, as she lifted her arms and shook them. "I have bubbie arms!"

With a sneer of disdain, she pulled the dress off, tossed it across her lounge and grabbed another. The zipper froze at the small of her back and refused to go any higher.

"This is just what he wanted! For me to get fat! It's as if he knows I have plans with Nate tonight and his genes added ten pounds to my body." She charged at her reflection. "This is so typical. He doesn't want me, but he doesn't want anyone else to have me either! Basstard!"

Dorota returned shortly and began assisting Blair with getting ready for the gala she was attending with Nate tonight. Tucking the straw in the corner of her mouth, Blair sipped at her milkshake as she thought about how gallant Nate had been since her divorce. When she had awoke to find realtors showing her bathroom to couple who'd made a fortune producing Hemp fabric, she'd nearly hired a hit man to take out her Machiavellian ex. But as if on a white horse, Nate had shown up and helped her move into a hotel, and then went with her to a never ending amount of showings before she settled on this place. It was perfect. Perfect neighbourhood. Perfect view. And since furnishing it with her personal décor, it had a perfect interior too. It also was perfect in another way since the whole place lacked any reminder of Chuck… except maybe the ever more present reminder of his affect on her life that grew bigger inside her everyday. She knew Nate was still best friends with the bAss, but regardless, Nate had proved himself a great friend to her, so when he asked her to attend the Gala at the Met tonight, she could have hardly refused.

A few hours later, she headed downstairs to where Nate was waiting.

"You look beautiful." Nate smiled as he watched her walk down the stairs.

"I must say, Archibald, I love it when you lie to me... Feel free to continue" She commented dryly, as she let him help her on with her coat.

"Have I told you how thin you look tonight? Practically an Olsen." He smiled into her ear.

"I'm going to forget you said that." Cringing at his comparison of her fashion sense to that of someone with a line at Walmart. "Now, can we stop of at Grey's Papaya? I need a hot dog… and a piece of cantaloupe."

The next day Chuck scowled at the copy of the front page of Page Six, before throwing it into the fire. Blair and Nate stood together in the Atrium of the Met as the caption below the photo declared them to be the perfect couple. He sat back in his desk chair, folded his hands across his chest, and thought about how the more things changed the more they stayed the same.

He was just getting up to pour himself a drink when his secretary announced Nate.

"Nathanial." Chuck greeted non-commitally.

Nate nodded to his friend as he slouched in a captain's chair across from Chuck's desk. The silence dragged, and Chuck was the first one to break it.

"How is she?"

"As well as can be expected." Nate commented lounging back in his chair.

Chuck poured himself a drink and tossed it back, before refilling his own glass and making one up for Nate. He handed it off to him, before taking his seat behind his desk.

"I saw the paper. Don't you think the gala was a little much? I was thinking more along the lines of a shopping spree at Barney's or feeding the ducks at the park… Humiliating the nouveau riche of 5th Avenue… You know, things she finds restive."

"You know for someone who divorced her and sold her home out from under her, you seem pretty concerned about her stress level." Nate shook his head at his friend's scowl. "She was fine. I told her she was beautiful and thin, and you know that always makes her feel better. Basically I lied, but I've done it for years so she's used to it. In fact, it's kind of our thing now."

Nate smiled thinking about the friendship he had developed over the years with Blair. Given his very liberal politics, some of his Village friends thought it odd that he was close with two of the most powerful, materialistic capitalists in New York, but if there was one thing he understood, it was Chuck and Blair. The more deeply he got into politics, the more Nate felt that Chuck and Blair would have been perfect for it… they knew where all the bodies were buried. Unfortunately, they had racked up a pretty high number of skeletons in their own closets, which barred them from political life. Nate didn't think that either one of them lost too much sleep over that. They were Chuck and Blair. Another reason Nate had come to see them as perfect for each other, was that they accepted each other as is. They'd been out for each other's blood for the past few months, but that didn't change the fact that they loved each other.

"You didn't lie."

"What's that?" Nate asked confused, as Chuck's comment drew him out of his own thoughts.

"You didn't lie." Chuck repeated as he walked over to stand before the fire. The paper had long since burned, but it was as if he could still see the perfection of her face. "She looked beautiful.

TahDaH! Okay, I actually put a great deal of thought into Blair's weight. Maybe too much. I remember Dan saying she weighed 95lbs, but I have no idea. I'm not good at guessing people's weight… and also, I have to say it's not something I spend a lot of time trying to do. I don't really care how much anyone weights. So, if you are more knowledgeable then me on the weight thing… I'm sorry if I was way off. Oh, and speaking of weight… Banana bread French toast with crème fraiche is to die for… except if you eat it more than once in a blue moon it will probably kill you… or add on about 10lbs per serving. SO GOOD though!

Oh, and congrats to Joliane on getting my Old Hollywood reference. Clark Gable knocked up Loretta Young and she went to Europe and had the baby in secret. A few months later she returned to Hollywood with her "adopted" daughter. Twisted. For some reason I love stories that sound like a soap opera but are really in real life.