Story: A Touch of the Past
Author: Kira Dattei
Chapter: 10/18
Chapter Summary: Back on the Normandy…
Chapter 10: Relief
Chakwas had prepped the med bay for the sudden flood of patients efficiently, scanning each one and relaying instructions for care to Liara, who had graciously offered her help as soon as the shuttles had landed. It seemed as though there wasn't too much to be concerned about: besides the O-E readings in their systems, malnutrition, and some superficial damage that a little medi-gel was able to fix up, the freed biotics were easily taken care of and sent off to get some sleep.
Things were calm for the former prisoners, as long as they ignored Commander Shepard pacing around just outside the med bay, peering in on every single pass by the window.
Not that they hadn't figured out why he was hovering: Chakwas had already kicked him out of the med bay and had forbade him from entering again until she was done treating everyone.
But there was only one Shepard really cared about and Kaidan had been moved to the back and a curtain had been drawn around him so he couldn't see him. It was frustrating, almost as bad as after Mars when Shepard hadn't been sure if Kaidan was even going to survive his injuries. But Kaidan was right there and Shepard couldn't get to him.
And it was probably made worse by how Kaidan had seemed to just shut down after they got on the shuttle. He'd still been awake, but just barely and he had started pressing the heels of his palms against his head as though trying to push back pain. Considering what he had just put himself through, it was probably exactly what he had been doing.
Shepard had seen the state of his lover's neck, the skin roughly parted and his lead pulled out from where the gash started about an inch below where his port led to his implant with the amp pushed under the collar of his thermal suit. It didn't look like any medi-gel had been used at any point, Kaidan probably not wanting it to heal until his implant and amps were taken care of. But he had obviously been bleeding for quite some time, dried blood covering his neck and hands and likely his back underneath his thermal suit. But messing around to that extreme with his biotic hardware and then using his biotics after his lead had been cut and not eating for over a day was more than enough to set off a serious migraine.
Shepard had nearly needed to carry Kaidan off the shuttle and up the lift to the med bay. Chakwas had looked at him right away, leaving her current patient to scan the Major. But as soon as Kaidan had been deposited on a bed, Chakwas had exiled Shepard.
And hadn't said another fucking word to him since even though she had clearly moved on to other patients and had left Kaidan alone in the back of the med bay in only she knew what state.
Garrus had been less helpful this time around when he had approached the agitated commander. He had looked between the room and his friend a few times before declaring Shepard to be a ridiculous human before walking away. Asshole.
It took about half an hour for Chakwas to finally emerge from the med bay, many of the biotics following behind and turning toward the mess, and walked over to him.
"I apologize for asking you to leave like that, Commander, but I had to make sure I could treat Kaidan efficiently," Chakwas apologized.
"I do understand, but I would have appreciated something a little sooner," Shepard replied, only a little sternly.
"His vitals were concerning. He fell unconscious as soon as he wasn't moving and I'm not entirely sure how he lasted that long."
"He's tough, that's for sure. So what's it look like for him now?"
"I have already started him on a supplement regiment to help him regain lost sustenance, but there is not much more I can do for him, not without help from someone who is more familiar in biotics and the L2s. I can replace the lead and amp easily enough, but would recommend asking someone more specialized to clear his implant."
"We'll have Joker take us right to the Citadel. I'm sure Dr. Michel would be happy to get her hands on his implant again. Does he have any other injuries besides the cut around his amp?"
"Injuries, no, though I'm certain moving hasn't been agreeing with him. Besides severe bruising all over his body, there was trauma around his right shoulder. I certainly expected worse when I heard that he had been thrown down forty floors."
"He told me he dislocated his shoulder and had to reset it."
"That would explain that, then. He makes a good field medic if that reset and the work he did on his neck and amp is any indication."
"It's probably what saved his life. I suppose we will have to wait for him to wake up to find out just how he managed to survive that fall."
"Seems like it." Shepard hesitated, looking through the window to where he knew Kaidan was behind the curtain. "He has to stay down here, doesn't he?"
The doctor gave him a knowing look. "Until his implants are checked and we can heal the wound on his neck, there is a heightened risk of infection. He doesn't need that on top of everything already of concern in that area. The med bay is sterile and he won't be wandering around not being careful. But I have disconnected his amp and have dressed the wound as a precaution."
"So can I see him?"
"Can I stop you?"
Shepard smirked as he crossed his arms. "I wouldn't recommend it, no."
"Please don't wake him up. If he wakes up on his own that is fine, but the best thing for his body now is to rest."
"Got it, doc."
Shepard walked straight for the door and walked in, heading directly for the curtained area. Pulling away the thin partition, he stepped beyond and let it fall closed behind him before focusing on his lover.
Kaidan looked…unwell. He was lying on his left side, facing toward Shepard, likely to keep pressure off his right side as the medi-gel did its work on the joint. He had been stripped out of his thermal suit but it had simply been replaced with another sleeveless one, a way to help regulate his temperature while taking into consideration how he ran hotter as a biotic. There was an IV running into his arm, and Shepard could see the white material of gauze wrapped around Kaidan's neck. His lover's skin was pale, unhealthy to look at, but his breathing was even and deep with sleep and his face wasn't taut with pain.
But none of that was enough to keep Shepard away. If anything, it compelled him to make sure he was close to Kaidan now. He closed the rest of the distance, sitting down on the edge of the bed and kicked off his boots and shrugged out of his leather jacket he had only just changed into. He stood enough to get some leverage to reposition Kaidan, moving the man further to one side of the bed so he could lie down as well. Once he was comfortable on his back, he reached over to move his lover again, pulling the slightly smaller man toward him this time to rest on his chest, careful to not pull at the wound all the while.
Once they were both in a position they slept in regularly, Shepard at last relaxed and pressed his nose into Kaidan's hair, taking in a deep breath of the man's scent. Didn't matter that he smelled like the places he'd been stuck in over the past day, there was still the familiar musk that was all Kaidan.
Shepard could feel himself relax as he hadn't been able to since even before Kaidan had been taken. He had his lover back, banged up and recovering, but back.
He didn't realize he had even fallen asleep until he heard Chakwas call out to him from just outside the curtain. "Commander, we are about to dock at the Citadel."
She relayed the message then walked away, allowing him to maintain privacy.
"Are we taking Kaidan to Dr. Michel or is she coming here?" he called out as he shifted, wrapping his right arm around Kaidan's waist so he could move without dislodging the biotic from his position.
"If Kaidan is well enough, there is no reason not to go to Dr. Michel. Her facility is likely to be better equipped to check his implant."
Shepard turned his attention down to Kaidan and found himself hesitant to wake him. That wasn't unusual though: Shepard liked watching Kaidan sleep and waking his lover up wasn't something he really ever felt the urge to do. But this wasn't about spending time with the man. This was making sure Kaidan was really okay.
So he moved his right hand to Kaidan's shoulder and gave him a slight shake as he called his name. Kaidan demonstrated how tired he still was by not waking up immediately from that. He repeated the motion and the biotic took in a deep breath and moved to press his face into Shepard's chest. "Come on, Kaidan. Time to get moving." Shepard pressed.
"Why the rush? That couldn't have been more than two hours," Kaidan murmured, reaching up with his right hand and pulling Shepard's hand off his shoulder to grasp it.
Shepard checked the display on the console next to the bed. "You're a little off there, Major. Try six hours."
Kaidan scoffed at that, making Shepard smile: Kaidan usually woke up better than the Commander did. "Still didn't tell me why. Figured Chakwas would have you flayed for disturbing her patient."
"She probably would, but she's handing you over to Michel. We're at the Citadel, and if you can manage, we're heading to her."
"That bad, huh?" Kaidan's voice was still muffled but it didn't keep Shepard from recognizing the tension.
"She just wants someone better equipped for a second opinion. She didn't seem too worried about it."
"John," Kaidan shifted and pushed himself up onto his elbow and looked down to Shepard. "You know part of the reason I haven't switched out for a different implant, because of the risk of brain damage. What I did was risky and if I messed up my implant, I'm still not going to risk the surgery."
Kaidan would rather lose his biotics than upgrade to a safer implant. But Kaidan was a biotic. It was who he was, not what but who. Kaidan had embraced being a biotic when so many other humans denied what they were or used it toward the wrong end. Those that became monsters.
Like the guy who had taken Kaidan had been trying to turn Kaidan into.
They had looked at some of the data logs at the facility while they were looking for Kaidan and figured how they had been basically brainwashing the biotics into hating humans. And they had succeeded with some if the biotics who had attacked Shepard's team was any indication.
Whoever had done this didn't know the deep fear he had struck within Kaidan by doing this.
"They're your biotics, Kaidan. It's always been your choice what you do with them. You'll always have a place here on the Normandy and with me."
Kaidan gave him a gentle smile and leaned his head forward, Shepard moving forward to place his lips against Kaidan's forehead and felt the man relax against him again. He just enjoyed the contact, not really having taken the chance yet to just be in contact with Kaidan. He'd been touching him for hours now, but it wasn't the same.
Not that he could for very long. "I really don't want to break this up, but we really do need to get going if you're up for it."
Kaidan laughed, his breath fanning against Shepard's neck. "The day you want me to get out of a bed is the day we break up."
"I make no excuses for thinking the man I love is exceptionally hot."
Kaidan laughed again, then began moving away from Shepard. Wanting to give his lover every chance to actually get to the doctor, Shepard sat up with Kaidan to take some of the effort away. Once Kaidan was seated, the biotic reached over to the console that was monitoring his vitals and turned it off before pulling the needle out of his arm. Shepard wasn't disturbed by medical stuff like some others were, but he still shuddered a little at the dismissive way Kaidan pulled a needle out of himself. The Major then swung his legs over the side of the bed and started rotating out his limbs.
And Shepard was granted his first sight of the bruising Chakwas had mentioned. The joint around his right shoulder was a deep purple, which branched out to differing shades of blue. He couldn't see much more than that because of the thermal shirt, but it was more than he had seen before.
And he hadn't seen bruising to this extent on Kaidan since the thrashing he'd taken on Mars. At least it wasn't on his face this time. The shoulder was much less dangerous to have discoloration like that.
He must have gotten lost in his thoughts because Kaidan was suddenly calling him out on staring. "You could at least wait until I've had a shower to start on the lecherous looks, Shepard."
Instead of replying, Shepard reached out and ran his fingers gently over the gauze covering Kaidan's neck. "I don't care how dirty you are. As long as you're safe."
Kaidan reached up, taking Shepard's hand off his neck and then guiding it around in front of him. Shepard followed the motion easily, wrapping his other arm around Kaidan's torso beneath his arm, pressing his chest to Kaidan's back and his face against the side of his lover's face and neck.
Kaidan was back.
He was safe and in his arms again.
Damned if anything was going to change that anytime soon.
As long as he didn't count Liara walking past the curtain abruptly, making him pull away and move to stand up on the opposite side of the bed while Kaidan made the final motion to stand. Liara ignored the aborted display of affection as she walked past Shepard toward his lover, setting down a few articles of clothing before wrapping her arms around Kaidan's shoulders in a gentle embrace, which Kaidan returned easily.
"I am relieved that you are alright, Kaidan," the asari said against the gauze circling his neck.
"Thank you, Liara," Kaidan responded affectionately. Shepard knew the two had grown close as friends over the time spend on the Normandy, Liara helping Kaidan learn some of the more complex biotics and Kaidan being an understanding ear when it came to being sort of the odd one out in a crowd. To see their bond brought a smile to Shepard's face as well.
They pulled away from each other and Liara indicated the clothes she had brought. "I thought you may prefer clean clothes to walk through the Citadel in."
"You're the best, Liara." Kaidan reached out for the clothes, rifling through them to see what she had brought: an extra pair of his casual uniform pants, a short sleeved shirt, and…
"Why don't you ever wear that? It has to be more comfortable than your uniform," Shepard asked, lifting up the navy blue Alliance hoodie. He could tell that it was easily a few years old by how worn it was and yet he had never seen Kaidan in it.
"Just because you deign to wear whatever you want around the Normandy doesn't mean that's what I want to do. Besides, I'm a career officer…"
Shepard cut in with a muttered, "And a workaholic."
Kaidan finished undeterred, "I wear my uniform more often than anything approaching civvies."
"Tight ass," Shepard retorted with a suggestive smirk, which grew as Kaidan's cheeks flushed slightly.
"Asshole," the biotic shot back.
Liara tried to suppress a chuckle and when she failed at that, she turned away and moved back to the concealing curtain and ducked out with the explanation of allowing Kaidan some privacy to get changed.
Shepard decided he wasn't done yet though. After all, the more he teased Kaidan, the more things went back to normal. "But in all seriousness, you need to stop wearing your uniform immediately and are only allowed to wear that if you aren't in your armor."
"Yeah, that's not happening Shepard."
The Commander watched as Kaidan stripped out of the thermal clothes and into his own, cataloging each cut and bruise, and watched as his lover's demeanor changed as he finished the task to seem somewhat more comfortable.
Kaidan glanced over to Shepard after he straightened from getting his boots back on, his gaze calculating as was normal for the Major. "I'm alright Shepard. If you could let me be Major Alenko for now, that's the best I could ask from you."
Shepard didn't want to be Kaidan's Commander right now, he wanted to be his partner. The one who could be there to support him when he went to have his implants checked out. The one who Kaidan could rely on to stand next to him no matter what the doctor told him about his biotics.
"Counter-proposal: you're Major Alenko until we reach the examination room. Then rank has nothing to do with me being there."
Kaidan appeared relieved by that. "That I can handle. Now can we please get this taken care of so we can get back to saving the galaxy like usual?"
Shepard followed Kaidan through the curtained area and was forced to stop almost immediately as his lover came to a halt, his gaze focused on a woman seated at one of the consoles near the door.
"Hi Kaidan. I was just making sure you were alright," she said smoothly.
Kaidan was stiff, uncertain, and that put Shepard on high alert. "Just need to have my implant checked out and our doctor has decided to avoid that task." He was deflecting, bringing Chakwas into the conversation.
"You give me enough work without taking on your implants as well, Kaidan," Chakwas retorted from where she was working at her own console.
"Speaking of work, you've already sent me a report of treatment so I can get that off to Hackett, right?" Kaidan continued to avoid looking at the woman as he started moving again toward the door.
"Of course, Major. Shepard would you please talk with him about medical leniency on submitting reports? I have tried and it doesn't appear to be getting through to him."
"You think he listens to me when I tell him to slow down? I doubt even Hackett or Anderson could get him to take it easy if he didn't feel like it."
"Not yet out of the room," Kaidan groused. He finally turned to the woman, who didn't seem to know just how to take what she had just witnessed. "Look, I need to get over to the clinic. I'll talk to you once I'm back on the Normandy."
"Okay," she replied, though Shepard could hear the disappointment.
But then Kaidan was through the door and moving toward the elevator and Shepard had to keep pace. He wanted to ask what that was all about, but seeing his lover's tight posture kept him from actually voicing any question to broach the subject. He figured Kaidan would tell him when he was ready anyway. Kaidan was pretty open and honest with him about things that bothered him.
The pair moved through the Normandy and then the Citadel quickly, not being held up by anyone or anything as they headed for Huerta Memorial, being guided right to one of the private rooms and instructed to wait for the doctor once they arrived. Kaidan had taken off his hoodie as well as the gauze on his own, knowing he would be asked to anyway. As Kaidan sat down on the edge of the examination table, Shepard couldn't help but go around to look at the wound now that it had been cleaned up. It didn't look much better clean than it had rough and covered in blood.
Kaidan just stayed still and let Shepard look his fill.
Before Shepard could question for details of what had happened, Michel walked in and the Commander moved away to stand at Kaidan's side instead.
"Major Alenko, it has been a while. What do you have for me this time around?" She approached him as she talked, already pulling on gloves and looking in close.
"The lead was cut by some glass. I had to cut out the amp and reconnect it. We just want to check that the initial separation and me pulling the lead free didn't affect the implant."
"Do I even want to know why you had to reconnect your amp by yourself?" she asked as she started pulling at the split skin.
"I'll play it safe and say it's classified," Kaidan answered, his voice tightening in discomfort.
"It was a clean cut of the lead so there shouldn't have been any damage caused between the lead and the amp, especially with your medic and tech training. I can't see any signs of charring or other discharge."
"I didn't feel anything like that when I used my biotics, but pulling on the lead had already caused a migraine so I may not have been able to feel it if there was."
"You'd know if it was happening. That sort of damage tends to have quite the crippling effect on a person."
Michel moved away and activated her omnitool, scanning over Kaidan's neck and kept her focus on the device for a few moments. "You may be in the wrong field there, Major. I'm not reading any damage to the implant or port site. We'll still have to access it to replace the lead and of course connect a new amp."
"Of course."
"So his biotics won't be affected?" Shepard confirmed.
"Not at all. It's no worse than his normal maintenance. Let me go check my amp stock, unless you have another option in mind."
"Actually, I'll get in touch with a rep from the Spectre office and have one sent from their stock. I have my preferred models flagged that they can reference."
"You make my job so easy, Major."
"Good to know." Kaidan lifted his arm to pull up his omnitool, but paused as he seemed to realize something.
The same thing Shepard realized a few seconds later: Kaidan didn't have his omnitool. It was still stored safely in Shepard's cabin.
"I have it," Shepard said before he lifted his arm and sent a message along the secure channels to the Spectre office, requisitioning the amp. He received a response quickly - apparently someone had been told that Kaidan was being treated for it to come back so fast - and that someone would deliver the part within the next fifteen minutes. "It'll be here soon," he told Michel before turning back to Kaidan. "I'll get your omnitool back to you once we return to the Normandy. I know you spent a lot of programming time getting that thing just the way you like it."
Kaidan gave him an appreciative look, "And if you knew anything about tech operations that would actually mean you understand why I didn't want to start from scratch on a new one."
Michel activated her omnitool again and waved it over Kaidan's neck, administering some medi-gel to start numbing the area so she would be able to work. "Let me just go get what I need to make the switch. I'll be right back," Michel said with a smile before making a quick exit and the couple was left alone.
"So, you'll still be same old Kaidan, biotic human badass," Shepard quipped. Kaidan rolled his eyes as he placed his hands on the bed behind him and leaned his weight back onto them.
"I'll get right to work on getting myself an article in Badass Weekly." Shepard chuckled and walked around to stand in front of his lover, leaning forward to press a chaste kiss to warm lips. He felt a surge of victory as he felt Kaidan follow him when he moved away. Nothing like proof that Kaidan wanted the contact as much as he did.
"Let's keep it between us and the crew. You don't need any more attention and I don't share, at all really."
"Would you please stop saying stuff like that at least until I get my preliminary report off to Hackett? I would like to keep my reputation for timeliness on paperwork."
"I make you want to slack off?" Shepard asked with a sly grin.
"When you get that tone and say things like that, kind of."
Shepard moved in closer to press another brief but slightly firmer kiss to Kaidan's lips. He remained close though and his vision was filled with Kaidan's face. "So much for me not being able to charm you."
"It has nothing to do with charm, Shepard. It's just that you mean it and I haven't really…had someone mean things like that toward me before."
Shepard wasn't sure what to say in response to that. They hadn't really talked about other relationships before and the Commander wondered what had prompted Kaidan to do so now. But that didn't mean he was completely lost on coming up with something. "Hey, every time, remember? Anything you need and I'll help you out however you need. If that's just reminding you that I don't want anybody else, than that's what it is."
Kaidan smiled again before leaning away from Shepard. The Commander took the hint and backed away, shifting to lean his hip against the bed next to his lover. About ten seconds later, Michel returned and got to work getting Kaidan back to normal biotic operation.
A/N: Thank you so much for reading and see you next time.
Kira Dattei
