Spoilers for the recent episode. I'm looking forward to the conclusion.

Enjoy.


Am I in love?

Neville Parker had dealt with many things during his life.

Illnesses, allergies which had affected him and made him moan, moan, and moan had plagued him throughout his life, and when he had arrived in Saint Marie, he had been bombarded with the incredible heat and light from the sun, suffering from mosquito bites until you could play join the dots all over his body, while he suffered from rashes of various kinds, on top of the more mundane allergies such as hayfever.

When he had been younger, he had discovered a good chunk of the allergies and health issues he'd suffered, but despite that, his parents had refused to let him focus on his weaknesses and make him aspire for more in life and for that Neville was eternally grateful although as a youngster he had often used his illnesses as a crutch to stop him from living his own life until he had won several awards and prizes at school competitions in order to build up his confidence, and it had gone on from there.

He had seen for himself he could have a life. And when he had made that realisation and discovered a focus, he had done well at school and higher education before he had joined the police, developing hobbies along the way such as when he'd received the metal detector when he had been nine years old, and he had such fun with it; the entire world had become one vast treasure hunt for the young Neville Parker at the time. He had gone on dates even if that time when he'd tried to impress the girl whom he was with at the time with his lobster-shell cracking skills had gone horribly wrong

At first, Neville had resisted because of his problems, but as time passed and his parents forced one thing on him after another, he had eventually felt confident enough to join the police after he had discovered a liking for mysteries. He had risen through the ranks because thanks to his keen eyes he had seen things others hadn't.

When he had found himself on Saint Marie, Neville had had problems; one of the reasons why he had not really made much of an effort to fit right in with the crowd which any other travelling Englishman would have done was he had no idea what would happen if he tucked into a piece of exotic looking food, which was why he'd opted for the tried and true chicken and chips, even if he was slowly trying to change. He had been so frightened of finding and eating something unintentionally used in the recipe, only to discover it was the Big It, the thing which his body would react with, and kill him. He hadn't told anyone about his fears because he didn't want them to think anything less about him. He had caught more than a few whiffs of Caribbean cooking and seen enough of the ingredients used in the food on Saint Marie to know he needed to be cautious, but he was slowly becoming open to the thoughts of experimenting with them to see which ones were the most dangerous.

But having Catherine come to him and ask him if he was in love with Florence was something Neville had never expected. The older French woman had sat down at his table shortly after Florence (who looked seriously beautiful wearing that yellow dress) had left, and she had told engaged him in conversation about the case although it hadn't gone very far; Catherine's own daughter was a police officer from what Neville had learnt over the course of his short tenure on Saint Marie, so Catherine knew there was only so much which could be divulged.

Catherine had moved the subject on slightly to tell him she was organising a thoughtful service for Pasha's friends and family, but what she'd really wanted to talk about was him and Florence.

Neville had to admit she had only asked because his eyes had wandered over to where Florence was with two of her friends, looking as radiant and as happy as normal (yes, he would be the first to admit he had given her a headache when they had first met, what with the embarrassment shared between them both when he'd assumed she was a nurse, and he would not think of that, but he had grown to be very fond of her), but he hadn't expected the bluntness Catherine had used to ask him what his feelings towards Florence were.

Neville had tried to play things down, of course; saying he and Florence were interacting in a platonic and professional capacity, but Catherine Bordey was not one to give in easily without a fight, especially when it came to romance.

She had pointed out to him how he hadn't stopped glancing over towards where Florence was. And it was true, he hadn't, but he just could not take his eyes off of her, especially when she wore that dress. But he had played it down, excusing it by saying he had not realised he had been looking at her when he clearly was.

He had told Catherine he believed Florence was great and she was, she was phenomenal; she was kind, beautiful, generous, her smile could light up the island better than the sun…Wait, what? But he had tried to stop himself from saying anything more to Catherine; she already showed she was a master of taking anything you said and turned it around, although not maliciously.

But when she had left, Neville had mused on what Catherine had said.

Was he in love with her?

Aside from work, he and Florence did spend a lot of time together, and he had to admit to himself now he was thinking about it when the fire accidentally burnt the shack, he was forced to see the incident as a turning point for him. He had spent three whole months resisting the opportunity to change, enjoy life here on Saint Marie.

Neville could excuse it and claim the fire would have begun even if Madeline was still around, but she wasn't and he could not be sure, but would he have still embraced life even if he was taking it all slowly? He had no idea.

It had been Florence who was encouraging him, not Madeline.

Madeline had tried to get him to loosen up in the brief time they'd known one another, but it hadn't worked out since Madeline had never shown much interest in getting him out of his shell, but Florence had made a real effort; thanks to her, he had started wearing shorts!

Oh god, I am in love with her, aren't I? Neville thought to himself in surprise. He thought about it for a bit more and then he shook his head. No, it would never work out; for a start, why would she want to love him? He was annoying. He suffered from numerous allergies, he complained a lot.

Why would someone like her be interested in him? But he knew he had helped her, especially when he'd discovered what had happened to her fiancé a couple of years back, but that was not enough.

Florence deserved better than him, and he was surprised by how angry and jealous he was at the thought of somebody else loving her.