Lionblaze had always had a complicated love life.
First, it had been his love for Heathertail, but alas that fleeted away.
Then it was Cinderheart, but she had rejected him, having feelings rather for his sister than him. Which, of course, he hadn't minded. Cinderheart and Hollyleaf had been happy together, so that was all that mattered.
Then, his final love had died. The one he loved even more than Heathertail or Cinderheart combined.
Toadstep.
He hadn't realized he had loved the splotched tom at first. It began simply with friendship, as one could expect it would've.
But then Lionblaze noted something with Toadstep. He had been getting along well with him, even trying to mock some of his moves. This was when Lionblaze still had the power of stars in his paws from an old prophecy. He had been invincible, and no one besides him, his siblings, and Firestar had known. And so it was easy to guess from an outside view that anyone could achieve that kind of fighting capability.
Lionblaze had worried for Toadstep, believing the tom would be ripped to shreds if he tried fighting like him. But he had seen the determination the warrior had in his eyes when he and Lionblaze fought off a dog to save Bumblestripe. It was very admirable.
The two had gotten closer, and closer until one night, when the rain was pouring, Toadstep had pulled Lionblaze into the rain. Toadstep had confessed a love for Lionblaze.
It had been a shock. But, it warmed him, even in the freezing rain.
It had taken about a quarter-moon before Lionblazre realized that the feeling had been mutual, that Toadstep was the one. Not Heathertail, not Cinderheart; Toadstep.
He had confessed his own feelings the following day and the two began seeing each other more and even called each other mates, though it had not been made public yet. Though Jayfeather had figured it out with his power.
In the Great battle, the two fought side by side, protecting their clanmates and each other.
And they would continue to do so.
Until they couldn't.
An ugly green-cough had reached ThunderClan one leaf-bare, grabbing any cat it could with sickly claws. Toadstep had been one of those cats.
Lionblaze had tried to stay with Toadstep during that period, but Jayfeather nor Leafpool would let him near the medicine den, fearing that he could catch the same sickness.
Toadstep died on a warm leaf-bare night.
Jayfeather had told Lionblaze of it, telling him that he and Leafpool had done all they could, but it hadn't been enough.
Lionblaze had approached the body of his mate and he had touched him, the once well and happy cat as cold as the ice that hung from the dens and trees.
He had yowled. Wailed and sobbed so loudly no doubt all the Clans could hear his cries of anguish. His pleads and begs for StarClan to bring his love back to him, to bring him back to life so he could. hear that voice one more time. That sweet, loving, caring voice.
Lionblaze buried Toadstep himself, not letting the elders help like tradition. Bramblestar has allowed it, to which Lionblaze was grateful.
It had been at least a whole year since then. And Lionblaze was picking flowers. Mainly lilies. Lilies had been Toadstep's favorite flower. Jayfeater had helped Lionblaze find them, and even was picking them.
Lionblaze set down the portion of lillies he was carrying, "I think this is good enough. I won't be able to carry them if we pick anymore."
Jayfeather huffed and set his lilies down, "Why did you make me do this?"
Lionblaze chuckled, "I put the suggestion out there, I didn't make you."
Jayfeather huffed, facing Lionblaze as if he could see, though his eyes took a moment to focus, "That still doesn't answer my question."
"It's on a need-to-know basis. I'll tell you later." he mewed before collecting all the lilies.
Jayfeather snorted and rolled his eyes, "Whatever. Come back to camp soon, though. Don't get lost."
Lionblaze nodded and watched his brother walk off into the trees. Lionblaze smiled. Jayfeather had always been a major grump but overall his brother was softer deep down. Lionblaze knew that.
He turned around and weaved his way through the trees, walking over roots and through bushes and bracken. It had been a warm day for new-leaf. The sun was just warm enough and the breeze wasn't too cold. The plants were beginning to bud, and the lilies had already bloomed. A perfect new-leaf day.
Bird song weaved through the oak trees and reached Lionblaze's ear, making him hum a bit. He felt better than most days. Again, a perfect new-leaf day.
Lionblaze hadn't noticed the fast moving grey clouds, beginning to cover the blue sky and warm sun, and when he did a water droplet his nose. He looked up as it began to rain lightly, a small drizzle. He chuckled. Even though his fur was slowly getting soaked, the rain had almost been too perfect.
Soon, Lionblaze reached his destination. A large clearing that had patches of upturned earth, disturbed by many digging paws.
Graves.
Lionblaze walked up to one of the graves, knowing exactly which one it was. He swept the old, dried up flowers aside and set down the lilies gently on the dirt.
He sat down and looked at the grave, "I got your favorite, Toad." he purred, "Just bloomed, too."
A moment's silence swept through the graveyard. Lionblaze looked up, "This is familiar, huh? Remember? When you said you loved me in the rain?"
A small wind rusted a few nearby leaves. Lionblaze looked at them and smiled. He couldn't tell whether Toadstep somehow managed to do that, or it was just the wind. But either way, it was good enough of a response for him.
He lied down, "I miss you, ya' know? A-A lot." he unsheathed his claws, "Y-you shouldn't have died. It… it w-wasn't fair for you to die. You should still be here. W-with me."
Tears welled in his eyes and he rubbed them off, "I-i'm not blaming you for dying. No, that would be stupid. I-I-I just think y-you should've stayed longer. With me."
He put his paws over his muzzle, letting tears roll down his cheeks, "Why didn't you stay with me?" he choked out, struggling to speak through the tears.
A light.
A small light sparked behind Lionblaze, it being brighter than the last spark. The golden tabby looked over his shoulder and saw the light, "What in the-?"
Another spark.
The light began changing form, taking on… a more feline look.
The light began to take color and more shape, turning into a fluffy black tom with white splotches. His yellow-green eyes showed nothing but love and his voice had a small echo to it, but it was sweet and loving and caring, just like always, "I do remember. It's hard to forget a night like that."
Lionblaze was shocked as he looked at Toadstep. Toadstep smiled and laughed lightly, "What wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost."
Lionblaze laughed, "That… that was awful. Good, but awful."
Toadstep smirked, "A talent of mine." he purred, "I missed you too."
Lionblaze stood up and wrapped his paws around Toadstep, holding him, "It's… it's been hard. Without you."
Toadstep nodded, "I know. It hasn't been easy for me either."
Lionblaze let go from the embrace and looked at him, "I-'m guessing that y-your not staying, huh?"
Toastep wiped Lionblaze's tears, "No. I can't. But… I figured you needed me. Just for a moment."
Lionblaze smiled, "I'm glad you did."
Toadstep put his paw on Lionblaze's, "You're doing great."
"What?" Lionblaze raised a brow.
"At being without me. You're… so strong." Toadstep mewed.
"Not as strong as you think. But i'm-i'm trying. I really am." Lionblaze mewed.
Toadstep smiled and sat besides Lionblaze and looked at his graze, "Thank you for the lilies. They're very beautiful."
"Of course." Lionblaze mewed.
Toadstep leaned into Lionblaze and sighed. Lionblaze smiled and closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth from Toadstep.
It felt like a whole season had passed before Lionblaze opened his eyes. He looked down and saw Toadstep was gone, and the drizzle was beginning to fade away. Lionblaze looked around, "Toadstep!"
But the spirit of his old mate had disappeared. Lionblaze felt sorrow fill his chest but in the end he had gotten to see his mate again. That was all Lionblaze could ask for, right? He had seen his mate one last time. That was all he needed. He knew soon, some day, he would join Toadstep in StarClan. He just had to wait till then. Be patient. He smiled, It's more than I could've ever asked for.
He sat down as the rain finished and the sun shined again and the birds sang once more. He sighed and looked up at the sky, "May StarClan light your path, Toadstep…"
