Hello! 'Tis I, your queen A. Fan, here with another oneshot.

Guest: Your wish shall be granted!

L: Thanks! Of course it's depressing, I wrote it. Keefe will totally turn into Grady, this is irrefutable fact. Probably... though he usually does have to touch a person to know what they're feeling, so maybe he just never touched Hayley when she was thinking about her crush? I'm sure there's a logical explanation that doesn't include the author being an idiot. I (and probably a lot of other people) ship Marellinh because of the opposites attract dynamic, both in personality and ability, and they've been hanging out A LOT in Legacy. Soulmates... I would reject soulmates in real life, but writing about them is fun. I'll look forward to your next review!

Marigold Elizabeth Everdeen: Hmm... coincidence? I THINK N- actually yeah, it was. HECK YEAH, THE GAY SHIPS ARE THE BEST! *Starts waving flag and singing Hayley Kiyoko* *Everyone dies because my singing voice sucks* Hmm... Chadelitz? I'll see XD. Of course! Updates for Break the Rules are every Monday! Thanks! :D

MarellaIsTheBest!: Oh no! But thank you! Yay for inner fangirl! Boo for happy endings! Wait, what-? XD.

Swiftheart1267: Hi! Ahh thanks! Hmmm... writing stuff with the adults is pretty difficult for me, being a young teenager, and I can't draw much inspiration from my own parents. I'll see what I can do, but in the meantime, the user LoreleiLee500 has a bunch of stuff about Grady and Edaline, including one called "Truths," where they discuss Grady's ability. ~A. Fan.

Okay, so, basically... Guest (please give yourself a name, for future reference) requested Kam, so here is Keefe using cheesy pickup lines on Tam and Tam hating it, cough, loving it, but being very salty.


"Hey, Bangs Boy?" Keefe said.

"Yes, Keefe?"

"Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?" Keefe asked.

Tam gave him the biggest eyeroll in the history of eyerolls. "Keefe, that is without a doubt the lamest pickup line ever."

"Really?" Keefe asked, a terrifying glint in his eye. "I think I'd better try out a whole bunch, just to make sure."

"Oh mallowmelt no..." Tam groaned.


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

Tam sighed. He just had to have the most annoying boyfriend ever, didn't he? "What is it?"

"Is the sky blue?" Keefe asked.

Tam gave him a strange look. "Um... yes."

"Does one plus one equal two?"

"Yes, you idiot."

"Do elves have to breathe?"

"Yes..."

"Am I annoying?" Keefe asked.

Tam gave him a duh look. "Yes, definitely.

Approximately 9837598437 stupid questions later, Keefe asked "Can I kiss you?"

"Yes." Tam said automatically. "Wait a second, you-"

"You said you'd kiss me," Keefe sang obnoxiously.

Tam sighed and obeyed. His boyfriend was annoying beyond belief, but kissing him wasn't so bad.


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

"Oh no..." Tam muttered.

"Are you a chicken?"

Tam gave him a strange look, deciding that his insane boyfriend has officially lost his mind. "Keefe, what the heck?"

"Because you're impeccable! Get it?"

"Why am I dating you?" Tam groaned.

"Because you loooove me!"


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

"What? I was busy, Keefe."

Keefe ignored him. "Are you a broom?"

"No."

Ignoring him again, Keefe added "Because you sweep me off my feet!"

"I am going to hit you on the head with a broom if you don't get out of here in the next three seconds. Three... Two... One..."


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

"Just get your pathetic pick-up line thing over with."

"I'm no mathematician, but I know you plus me equals TRUE LOVE!" Keefe declared.

"And you plus cheesy pick-up lines equals dead you."


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

Tam slammed his head against a wall. "WHAT!?"

"Are you oxygen? Because without you, I'd die."

"Keep this up and you will." Tam threatened.


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

"Leave me alone."

"You dropped something."

Tam searched the floor. "I don't see..."

"No, I promise you dropped something!" Keefe insisted.

"What'd I drop, then?"

Keefe grinned, which made Tam brace himself for what would come next. "MY JAW!"

"I'm gonna break your jaw."


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

"No."

"If your heart was a prison, I would like to be sentenced for life." Keefe winked.

"You honestly should be locked up in Exile."

"Yeah, it probably is a crime to be as sexy as I am. But if extreme hotness is a crime, you should probably be in the cell next to me."

"No, I'd be arrested for murdering you."


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

"Keefe, I swear..."

"Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?"

"No, they hurt from running as far away from you as I possibly can."


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

"Keefe, don't you dare-"

"Let's flip a coin. Heads, I'm yours. Tails, you're mine." Keefe smirked.

"How about this alternative: Heads, you leave me alone. Tails, I run away screaming. If it lands on the edge I'll be yours and you'll be mine." Tam suggested.


"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

No response. Tam had learned not to respond by now.

"Hey, Bangs Boy?"

Still no response.

Keefe grinned. This was going to be fun."Bangs Boy? Bangs Boy Bangs Boy Bangs Boy BANGS-BOY-BANGS-BOY-BANGS-"

"Fine, what is it?" Tam sighed, admitting defeat.

"You're under arrest... for stealing my heart." Keefe grinned.

Tam rolled his eyes. "That's almost as lame as the heaven one."

"Well, now you're under arrest for not liking my amazing pick-up lines." Keefe pouted.

Tam sighed. "Go away, Keefe."

"NEVER!"


Well, I hope you enjoyed! This was a HECK of a lot of fun to write! Annoying Keefe, salty Tam, adorable Kam, this has everything! Kam Kam Kammy Kam Kam!


If you have a oneshot, feel free to request it! Tell me...

SHIP: (Required) Self explanatory. LGBTQ+ ships are more than okay! I love the gay ships! I obviously won't do incest or pedophilia. And I'm just telling you right off the bat, I don't write Sophie x Fitz. I also won't do couples that are married to someone else (EX: Grady x Della, not that I think anyone ships it).

MOOD: (Not technically required, but helpful) Fluffy? Happy? Tragic? Tragic is kind of my default, in case you were wondering...

TOPIC: (Not required) What should it be about? First date? Raising kids? Soulmate AU? Soulmate AU is probably my default.

You can request by either review or private messaging.

And remember, I have the right to refuse this request unless I promised one to you specifically. Whether I don't write for the ship, I don't like the topic, or I just keep hitting a wall when I set out to write your chapter, I have the right to refuse, so don't get mad at me for not granting a request. I also may take a while, but unless I specifically state it, I am planning on writing your chapter.


I think that's all! Please review!

Your semi-obedient author, A. Fan.