The Silence of Sound

It was morning in Burbank. Down below people were rushing in all directions to work, in the water tower it was quiet. The Warners had been up late, gotten home late and were sleeping in.

Wakko was the first one to wake up, he yawned and stretched and scratched his side and looked towards the clock and saw it was 8:30.

"I'm hungry," he said.

That woke up Dot on the lower bunk who immediately joined the conversation and said, "Me too, I want waffles."

The two of them raced out of bed and zipped into the kitchen. Yakko finally threw back his blanket a couple minutes later, stretched his body as long as it could reach, stretched both arms high above his head and let out a long yawn that strained his throat.

His eyes opened in confusion as he realized he didn't hear himself yawn. He opened his mouth and went "Ahhhhhhh" in the way he always did. But no sound came out.

His eyes got bigger. Did he somehow go deaf overnight? He reached up to his ears, no plugs, they didn't usually wear them to bed but he couldn't remember last night very clearly. It had been late, they'd been exhausted, but no, he wasn't wearing ear plugs. He could hear his brother and sister moving around in the kitchen. So, he could hear, but...he opened his mouth and said the first thing that came to mind, screamed it actually, but there was nothing. His eyes got even bigger and he ran into the kitchen.

The slightly panicked look on their brother's face got Wakko and Dot's attention.

"What's wrong, Yakko?" Dot asked.

Yakko opened his mouth and tried to talk, but there was nothing.

"Uh oh," Wakko said.

"I told you it was a bad idea to try singing every single word in the English language," Dot said not too compassionately.

Yakko thought back to last night when they did the TV special, he'd made it steadily up till the very end, and dropped, and everybody thought he couldn't do it, but he had, he finished the entire dictionary. His voice had been fine, but he'd been exhausted, now he felt fine but his voice was gone.

This didn't make him feel any better though, in 60 years this had never happened, so why now?

"Come on," Dot said, "Let's pay Dr. Scratchansniff a visit and see if he can help."

"What can he do?" Wakko asked.

"He is a doctor."

"He is?" Wakko asked. "I thought he was a p-sychiatrist."

"Come on!"


If Yakko could make any sounds they would've been strained and strangled as Dr. Scratchansniff pinched around his throat as he examined him. But even that couldn't get any audible response out of him.

"No sore throat or anyting of that kind, Yakko?" Otto asked as he felt for any swelling.

Yakko tried to make a 'uh-uh' sound but all he could do was shake his head.

"Hmmmmm," Dr. Scratchansniff leaned back in his seat and told the Warners, "Yakko seems to have strained his vocal cords. I vould advise taking it easy the next few days, drink plenty of hot tea, get plenty of rest, breathe in steam, and try gargling with salt water, and let me know how you're doing in a few days."

The expression on Yakko's face wasn't a hopeful one as they left the doctor's office.

"You're gonna need something to communicate," Wakko noted as they walked back to the water tower.

Yakko glared at him and raised both his hands.

"You can't do that, this is still a family show," Wakko said. "I'll see what I've got in my gag bag."

He pulled out his paper sack and took out a toucan, a piano, a motor scooter, a tuba, a phone booth, a potted tree, and a stop sign.

"Ah ha!" Wakko was about to crawl inside the bag entirely when he pulled himself back and held up a buzzer with a big red button.

"What's that for?" Dot asked.

"He can use it to let us know when he doesn't like something," Wakko explained, "What do you think, Yakko?"

With an unamused look on his face, Yakko pressed the button and a loud buzz answered for him.

"Maybe you should try again," Dot suggested.

"Alright, hang on."

Wakko leaned over the bag again and took out a flamingo, a lawn jockey, a chainsaw, a skateboard, a sun lounger, and finally found a metal bell.

"You can use this when you do like something."

Yakko tried it out, the loud metallic clang didn't do anything for his disposition, but he pocketed both items and they headed back for the water tower.


"Hot tea!" Dot announced as she poured a cup and put it on the table in front of Yakko.

While he waited for the bag to actually steep, Yakko hovered over the cup and inhaled some of the steam rising up from it. After a few minutes when the water turned a dark brown, he tossed the bag away and took a sip of the concoction, and his eyes immediately bugged out and his tongue stuck clear out in disgust.

Wakko took the cup and ate the whole thing in one swallow, steam came out of his ears and he moaned, "Eew, that didn't taste very good, did it?"

Yakko shot him a look.

"How about hot cocoa?" Wakko suggested.

Yakko didn't know if it would help his voice but he knew for fact it'd taste better than the tea. Dot made a steaming mug for each of them, Wakko ate his cup and all in one swallow again. "That's better."

Yakko rolled his eyes and blew on his so it didn't burn his throat. He drank it down pretty quickly, but when it was done he still couldn't get a sound out.

"Scratchy said it'd take a few days," Dot pointed out.

Just what Yakko didn't want to hear. He'd never been without his voice. Oh sure they started off doing silent cartoons, but that was different, that was acting, he could still talk while they did it and around filming, which he'd done all the time. He silently sighed and pouted as another thought occurred to him. His strength was his gift of both gab and song, and now he couldn't do either. They were all good at physical comedy, but would he even still be funny without his voice? It was too depressing to think about, but he couldn't do anything but think about it, the only voice of his own he could hear was in his head.

For that matter...could they even go out and do any of the stuff they normally did, while he couldn't talk? They'd been siblings for 60 years, they'd know what he was thinking and what he wanted them to do, but there'd be no delivery, no punch line, it wouldn't even be worth the while. Yakko sank lower in his seat as he felt himself sinking even deeper into a depression, until he slid clear off his chair and landed on the floor.

"I don't remember having the chairs waxed," Wakko commented.

Dot slapped her forehead and told him, "Do us a favor...stop speaking."

Yakko threw his head back and his mouth flew open in a silent laugh.


Losing his voice hadn't had any effect on Yakko's appetite, he was able to eat all three meals, and drank seven more cups of hot cocoa hoping it would help his voice, but to no avail. That had been about the only thing he felt like doing that day though. He'd crawled into his bottom bunk that night hoping in the morning either he'd have his voice back or this would all have just been a bad dream.

The next thing he knew, he could hear Dot talking to him.

"Get up, Yakko, it's 9:30."

He had cocooned himself in his blanket during the night so even his head was covered, and his only response was to stick his hand out and wave them off. Dot and Wakko looked at each other and exchanged the same expression, Dot's eyebrows gnarled together and gritted her teeth as she said determinedly, "That does it." She yanked the covers away so fast that Yakko spun like a top before he landed sitting up in the bed.

"You are just feeling sorry for yourself, Yakko," Dot told him, "and we're not having it. Now get out of that bed and do something!"

If he hadn't seen his little sister in action countless times with unsuspecting boobs, Yakko might've just rolled back over and gone back to sleep. But he knew Dot better than that, and slowly got up and headed into the bathroom to take a shower. While there he tried inhaling some of the steam, a thousand different thoughts were swirling through his head, but any he tried actually giving voice to just came out as a cracking wheeze.

"Any better today?" Wakko asked when he joined them at the kitchen table.

Yakko's response was a cynical glare and a heavy pound on the buzzer's button.

"Oh, sorry to hear that."

Yakko leaned over the table with a furious glare.

"Sorry, you know what I meant," Wakko replied.

Yakko tried sighing but it still didn't do any good.

"Well you're not just going to sit around the water tower all day feeling sorry for yourself," Dot told him, "Let's go out and do something."

Yakko shrugged, indicating 'Do what?'

"Where will we go?" Wakko asked.


"I got mine," Dot whispered as she met up with Yakko in the library. She had a stack of books in her arms that were piled to her chin, biographies on Mel Gibson, Brad Pitt, and Tom Cruise. "You ready to check out?"

Yakko answered by holding up a stack of sports magazines with bikini clad women on the covers.

"Boys, go fig," Dot said to herself.

They took their things to the front desk, one by one presented their library cards and got their stuff stamped and were told to bring them back in two weeks. They exited the library and headed over to the tree they'd tied Wakko up at, figuring it was a safer bet to leave him outside than have him eat something they'd have to pay for.

Wakko sat on all fours and scratched his side with his foot like a dog and even barked a couple times.

"Ready to go?" Dot asked as Yakko untied him.

"Yeah, I'm hungry." And to prove it, he picked up one of the decorative rocks lining the sidewalk and swallowed it.

Yakko waved for them to follow him. They got across the street and all stopped and saw a mime performing at the corner, but there was no one around. The three siblings looked at one another, shrugged mutually, and mimed their way into the act behind him. First they mimed that the mime was trapped inside a giant box, then they mimed lifting very heavy objects and tossing them up in the air. A faint whistling sound of something falling was heard before three invisible objects hit the mime on the head, all of them clanging loudly. The Warners laughed even though Yakko's still couldn't be heard, then mimed they all got in a car and drove away, accompanied by the sounds of the engine revving, the gears shifting and the radio blaring as they did it.

They got a few blocks away and stopped when they saw a street vendor selling lemonade, hot dogs and peanuts.

"Well isn't that convenient?" Dot asked, and looking to the 4th wall added, "And just a touch nostalgic?"

The three of them cooked up a plan. Yakko rolled up his pant legs and in one swift move jumped on top of the cart and jumped into the giant lemonade dispenser, wading in it clear up to his hips. He held onto the sides of the square container and kicked his feet in a pedaling motion, infuriating the vendor till his face turned red, smoke came out of his ears and he yelled something incoherent at Yakko, and while his back was turned, Dot and Wakko grabbed several hot dogs and bags of peanuts and took off. Yakko blew the vendor a kiss and waved goodbye as he jumped out of the container and took off after his brother and sister, they disappeared around a corner and dug into their lunch.

When they were done eating, they dumped the wrappers in the trash and started walking again.

"What do we do now?" Dot asked.

"Hey," Wakko stopped in his tracks, "I got a great idea where we can go!"


It was pure reflex, but Yakko yelled at the top of his lungs as the roller coaster sped down the hill at 100 mph. He still didn't make any sound, not that anyone would notice because they were on a car with 20 other people, all of whom were screaming, none of which could even begin to match pitch pipes with Dot, who was yelling loud enough for all of them as the car rushed towards the bottom, rushed, rushed, rushed, the gravitational force making it feel like they were all going to be thrown out of the car as fast as they were going, instead it whooshed up another hill, and sped down another, and then they kept straight for a little bit before going through three loops, then they were dropping again, all three of the Warners screamed and held onto each other every time the car moved to an angle and it really felt like they'd be tossed out before the turn was complete.

And then suddenly the car slowed down as it returned to the starting point.

"Awww, is that it?" Wakko asked as they came to a full stop. "It was just starting to get good!"

"Come on," Dot said as they pushed the safety bar loose so they could get out and walked around the amusement park. "What should we go on next?"

"How about that one?" Wakko pointed to the Scrambler.

"Or that one," Dot pointed the other way towards the Tilt-A-Whirl.

Yakko raised his hands and shook his head and pointed over to the Zipper.

"Yeah!" the other two cheered as they raced over to get on it.

The three of them got fit in one car, the guy running the ride slammed the door shut and rocked the car back and forth before starting it and they went up, and then they stopped at the top.

"Not much of a view," Dot said as she tried to see through the small barred window.

"Whee!" Wakko said as he rocked in his seat, causing the whole car to tilt front and back so one second they were looking up at the sky, the other they were tipped downward looking to the ground.

"AHHHHHHHH!" Dot yelled, and reached over and hit him, "Stop that!"

"What'd I do?" Wakko asked.

Yakko used his position between them to try and keep them apart from each other, then the ride started again, and they were moving, and they were moving down, and then the car flipped over, and then they were going up, all the while they were tipped on the side and felt flat on their backs as the car moved up at a high speed, then towards the stop it started spinning around and around, they all screamed and held tight to one another as the car suddenly slammed forward and they were all thrown on their faces pressed against the window the whole way down. It continued like that for a very long two and a half minutes before they finally stopped on the ground and were let out of the car.

Dot clutched her throat and said gravelly, "I'm gonna lose my voice too before this is over."

"Yakko," Wakko tugged on his arm, and stood on his tiptoes to whisper something in his brother's ear. Yakko just shot him a look.

"I can't help it," Wakko said self consciously, "That ride scared the you know what out of me...or it's going to."

Yakko rolled his eyes and shook his head and grabbed Wakko by the arm and walked off to find the restrooms. They had just left the scene, leaving Dot behind, when Yakko's free arm appeared back in the scene and grabbed her to come along with them.

"Hey!"

Yakko dragged his sister along as she pulled back and told him, "Let me go! I'm not going in the bathroom with you!"

Skippy Squirrel briefly appeared in the scene to comment, "Speeew!"

"Skippy!" Slappy's voice called out from somewhere off-screen, "Where are ya? You're gonna miss your first driving lesson on the bumper cars!"

"Coming, Aunt Slappy!" he answered, and ran out of the scene.

They reached the restrooms and Yakko pointed at the spot they were standing on as an indicator for Dot not to move until they got back.

"Yeah yeah yeah," she said dryly as she folded her arms, "Just get on with it."


Yakko felt totally and completely exhausted that night. He hadn't forgotten by any means that he still couldn't talk, but now it just felt more of a mild annoyance than something earth shattering. The three of them had been so busy that day he'd actually hardly had time to stew about it. After dinner he had little more than enough energy to just crawl into his bed and close his eyes.

He woke up once during the night because something didn't seem right. He felt warm, almost hot, he felt confined...there was someone or something else in his bed.

He opened his eyes and saw the reason for all of these things was that Wakko and Dot were asleep in the bed on either side of him. He looked at Wakko on his right, and Dot on his left, and back, and forth, and back, and forth. He couldn't actually feel the strain on his vocal cords, but he could suddenly feel something swelling in his throat. Overwhelmed by this, he reached out on both sides and hugged his siblings against him and fell back asleep, feeling a strange sensation of contentment with their added presence.


It rained all the next day, so the Warners stayed inside and watched game shows on TV. Wakko and Dot jumped up and down to offer their own answers to the questions. Yakko hit his buzzer to chime them in as if they were actual contestants on the show. They'd give their answers before the actual contestants on TV did, and when the people on TV gave a particularly stupid answer, Yakko would hit his buzzer four or five times in a row disapprovingly.

"Come on!" Wakko yelled at the TV, "Higher! Higher! Thousands of dollars higher!" he leaned back with his arms folded to his chest and grumbled, "You'd think nobody ever bought a tank before."

Yakko grinned as he buzzed at contestant number two's incorrect answer.

"We ought to go on one of these game shows sometime," Dot said, "we could have a choice between winning a car, a trip to Fuji, or a million dollars."

"We'll take it all, Bob," Wakko said.

Yakko rang his bell in agreement.

"And we'll take them too! Helloooooooooo nurse!" Wakko pointed to the lovely assistants in short glittery gowns as they gestured to the prizes.

The two brothers jumped up and down on the couch, Wakko whistling and Yakko ringing his bell incessantly.

"Boys," Dot rolled her eyes, "Go fig."


Not being able to talk was one thing, you expected that when you lost your voice. But Yakko had discovered a variety of things that also changed when you lost your voice. Trying to sneeze for one. Oh sure the 'CHOO' part never failed, but with no voice there had been no preluding 'ahh', and the 'CHOO' was a much quieter 'choo', like listening to a cat sneeze. Hiccuping...never fun to begin with, a lot less fun when nobody else could actually hear you having them, if they actually bothered to look they might see you twitch and might hear that very slight last 'cu', which was easy enough to mistake for any one of a dozen different things.

One advantage to it though, nobody heard you cry either. Yakko knew Dot was right, he was just feeling sorry for himself, but he couldn't help it. He wasn't patient by nature and he was frustrated with waiting, he wanted his voice back, he wanted to be able to talk about everything and nothing and deliver punchlines and be able to sing about planets and countries and math again, it was what made him him and without it he didn't feel like himself. He sat on the edge of the tub in the bathroom and waited for it to stop. During one of their routines when some big bully of a grownup yelled at them, they could turn on the waterworks in a heartbeat, and if they continued long enough they could eventually flood the room, it never came to that though, they were always told to knock it off fairly quickly, and they always did. This was different though, these were just a few random tears that refused to stay in his eyes, they moved slowly and they didn't show any sign of stopping yet. He wiped them away, he tried blinking back the rest, and when he finally thought they had stopped, he left the bathroom and padded over to the bunk bed. Dot and Wakko were already asleep, each in their own respective bunks. Yakko pulled back his blankets and got in and felt something under him. He reached under and pulled up Wakko's teddy bear, the one he had with him on one of their outer space episodes.

Yakko knew it was no accident this thing had wound up in his bed, he looked above him and listened, he could hear Dot humming softly in her sleep, and above her, a little scratching, a small bark here and there. They were sound asleep. Shrugging to himself, he hugged the teddy bear to his chest and settled back against his pillow, and quickly fell asleep.


'Where's Dot?' was on the small sign Yakko was holding the next morning as he entered the kitchen and saw only Wakko there.

"I don't know," Wakko answered, "she left early this morning, said she had an errand to run." He shook his head, "Nothing yet?"

Yakko shrugged as he went over to the fridge and took out the milk.

"I'm here!" Dot announced in a singsong tone as she entered the water tower, "And I brought reinforcements."

"Yeah yeah yeah," Slappy grumbled as she climbed up and stepped into the water tower, "Drag my keister out of bed at 6 o' clock in the morning, this had better be good."

"What're you doing here?" Wakko asked.

"I heard you were having some vocal problems," Slappy addressed Yakko.

Yakko started to nod but instead his head was thrown back, his eyes bugged out to twice their normal size as Slappy yanked his tongue out of his mouth so tightly his head about snapped from it.

"Ooh, your pear shaped tones look like a couple expired walnuts," she observed as she let go of his tongue and it slapped back into his mouth. "So I'm going to fix you up with a Slappy Squirrel special, don't go away."

Wakko leaned over and asked Dot, "Why'd you get her?"

"Old folk remedies are supposed to be pretty darn effective," Dot pointed out, and gestured to Slappy, "She's the oldest folk we know, so she has to know something."

Slappy mixed up a quick concoction half compiled of contents from their kitchen and half from the contents of her purse. She poured it in a glass and whatever it was was green and bubbling.

"Okay kiddo, open your mouth, close your eyes, and hope your gag reflex is out of order," Slappy said as she dipped Yakko back and forced his mouth open.

Yakko gargled as the stuff was poured down his throat. He managed to swallow it and made a horrible series of noises in response to it and told her, "That's disgusting! That's the worst stuff I ever tasted! That's-" he blinked and his eyes bugged out again as he realized, "It worked!"

Dot and Wakko jumped up and down and hugged each other in victory.

"What was in that?" Yakko asked Slappy.

"Classified secret, kiddo, don't mention it," she replied as she slapped him sharply on the back. "I gotta get back, I'm gonna miss Sally Jessy."

"Thanks, Slappy!" the three Warners waved as she headed for the door.

"Ehhhhh knock off the sentimental garbage!" she told them as she left.

"It worked!" Yakko exclaimed in awe, "I can talk again!"

"So does this mean you're going to do the show next week where you count every number past zero?" Wakko asked as he sat down at the table, and inadvertently sat on the buzzer.

"I think that says it all," Yakko said, "Goodnight everybody!"