Recovery 01
It was cold. Yet the air felt scalding as she gasped in a breath. And her skin was like ice. Everything was pain. The migraines had never been this bad. The hunger had never been this bad. The beatings had never been this bad.
If she could just have used her hands she could have crawled away. She could have found a Merchant dealer. She could have made it stop.
Symptoms inducing delirium. Normal thoughts interrupted. Coil would reacquire quickly if found wandering down the street seeking drugs. Withdrawal worsening.
Her whole body shook as the implications took root. She couldn't trust her own mind anymore. Her mind was all she had. If she couldn't trust her mind what did she have left?
It would have been easier just to die instead of dealing with this.
Or to let Master keep using her. Being a Pet was easy. It was simple. It was calming and normal and -
Sarah screwed her eyes shut, scraping her right foot down her left leg and leaving a bloody gash behind from her toe nail. It wasn't much. It was enough.
Sarah died again.
Nancy sobbed, biting her tongue, forcing her thoughts away from Coil and his drugs.
Taylor would be back soon. She'd help. She'd…she'd help.
"Shh, shh, it's okay, it's okay. Try to drink. You need fluids."
Nancy swam up from the fog, her eyes fluttering open. A mug took over most of her field of vision as it was held against her lips. Taylor's curly hair and expressive eyes visible just behind it. Nancy swallowed, the tea in the mug soothing her aching throat. She gulped the rest, grasping for the mug, only realizing that her hands were free as the drink vanished. Her eyes widened and she stared at her wrists, the mug forgotten.
"You were whimpering and tossing and turning. I couldn't just keep watching you suffering," Taylor murmured. Nancy lowered her hands, and stared at Taylor. "Don't look at me like that. You're not going to overpower me, I'm like a beanpole but you're practically a stick."
Nancy, winced and flopped back onto the bed letting her eyes shut in silent agreement. Her leg stung. Why did her leg hurt? She reached down to scratch at it and Taylor caught her hand.
"Don't. Just…don't."
Taylor is worried that you might become aware of something that would distress you. Distressing item on your leg. Your leg is wrapped in bandages. Leg is injured. You injured your leg while suffering increased symptoms.
She hissed, not fighting as Taylor laid her hand back down over her chest and patted her arm. The girl reached down and wiped a washcloth over her brow. The cloth was soothing even if it didn't help the migraine pounding just beneath the surface. "Someone is coming over to help in about five minutes. I'm glad you're a bit more lucid right now. You've been out of it most of the day."
Nancy's eyes shot open and she whipped upwards fast enough that her head cracked against Taylor. Both of them moved away, groaning and rubbing at their foreheads.
"Ow. You need a doctor. I got the next best thing."
Taylor's backpack is in the room and her costume's sleeve is partially visible. She either sought assistance with an Alley Physician or Panacea. Neither make house calls. Taylor is not well off but is earnest. Supremely unlikely to know of back-alley doctors. Wouldn't trust someone who helps villains. Panacea is the more likely option.
Nancy bit her lip, glancing down at the bed, clutching at the blankets. This wasn't ideal. No one should know that she was here. Her breath came in short pants as she tried to force down the panic of Coil finding out with the knowledge that Panacea kept her healings confidential as a rule.
"It'll be fine. You'll see. It'll be fine. I'm going to keep you safe. I promise."
Nancy couldn't help the quiver of her hands, but at least she was able to nod. Taylor laid her own hands over Nancy's and squeezed. "You're not doing well, Nancy, and it's barely been a day. I have to make sure that someone who knows what they're doing looks you over. If it's just psychological then we can work through it. But if it's also physical…You've been throwing up a lot since I got back. And I don't like how pale you are or how much you're sweating. Just…she's going to help. Okay?"
Nancy flipped her hands over and gripped Taylor's wrists. She let out her breath in a shaky wheeze. It was all she could really do. It wasn't like she had much choice in the matter.
Current fluid loss and Taylor's evident concern implies a longer period of non-lucidity than anticipated. Withdrawal is worsening. Coil heightened the dosage. Symptoms could lead to death if not addressed.
Death was preferable to getting caught looking for another fix. Death was preferable to being a slave again. Death was preferable to letting Sarah's outlook on Coil back out into the light.
Taylor is ally. Taylor is friend. Taylor has brought assistance. Assistance will heal [̶̼̑H̸̪̐o̷̰̔s̷̖͆t̵̙̀]̴̢̈.
Nancy grimaced. Panacea could potentially heal her body. But it was well documented that she couldn't do anything for her mind.
Nancy flinched as the door of the room closed again. She tried moving deeper under the blankets, but she'd already wrapped them fully around herself - all she could do was shove herself against the wall. It wasn't ideal. It would do.
She peeked out of the blankets and tracked the two new teenage girls. One stood next to Taylor in jeans and a white T-shirt, her blonde hair reaching nearly to her waist. The other had Panacea's robes, though the hood was down. Nancy mentally patted her power on the back. It had been right, Taylor had somehow managed to convince Panacea to come and look her over. How in the hell she'd managed that was scary to consider.
"Jeez, you weren't kidding when you said she was skittish," Panacea muttered.
"Sn-Coil really messed with her head," Taylor said. Her voice was soft, and her hands were clenched into fists at her side. "Nancy? They're here to help. I'm going to be right here, okay?"
Nancy swallowed, forcing down a full-body shiver and managed to scoot a few inches away from the wall and stick her head out of the blanket fort.
"Vicky, I seriously doubt this girl can hurt me. You can wait downstairs. Distract her dad if he comes back early."
"Dad never comes back early," Taylor murmured. "He comes back late, but never early."
"Are you sure, Ames?" Glory Girl asked. She was frowning as she stared at Nancy. "I might be able to help…maybe hit her with a blast of my aura or something?"
"…Probably not a good idea. We wouldn't want her to get dependent on it."
Good cheer from Glory Girl's emotion manipulation aura would be beneficial for recovery. Panacea's movement towards Glory Girl at mention of aura manipulation implies desire for it as well. Panacea's denial and specific wording implies first hand knowledge of aura dependence. Panacea is dependent on aura.
Well that was just fantastic. Two addicts sitting in a room. There was probably a bad joke in this somewhere. If she could think better she could come up with something suitably ironic and amusing.
Not that she'd be able to share it with anyone, but it was the thought that counted.
"Nancy, I'm going to touch your hand now to start healing you. You aren't really in a position to be able to give consent at the moment, so Insect Girl has done so for you. Try to relax."
Nancy just shut her eyes and nodded. She pulled the blankets down enough to be able to slip an arm out. Panacea's hand was cold against her clammy skin.
"Kidneys are damaged, but working, liver is shutting down, blood toxicity is high, hormones are way out of balance, Christ her body is eating itself. Whatever Coil gave her it wasn't just Crystal Sand. I've seen Crystal Sand detox and it doesn't leave someone this bad."
"Can you help her?" Taylor's voice was soft enough that Nancy could barely hear her.
"My sister can heal anyone. If they're alive, she can fix them."
"Do you have any food here, Insect Girl? She doesn't have enough raw material in her body for me to work with right now. I need building blocks if I'm going to be able to do anything. Anything would work, but things high in protein would be best. Meat, fish, eggs, nuts, I'll take whatever you have."
"We have a lot of eggs, and some ground beef. I can go make something. Give me 10 minutes, I'll be right back!"
Panacea frowned as she met Nancy's eyes while Taylor started running for the door. Her gaze narrowed and she looked at their joined hands, her eyes flicking towards Taylor. Her lips curled into a scowl as she sucked in a breath.
Not a healer. Healer secondary application. Building blocks implies that she doesn't need you to ingest or process the food. She just needs access to it. Biological manipulator, not healer. Does not want to advertise true nature of abilities. Deep seated frustration with powers. Frustration over use of powers. Wants to use powers to full extent. No excuse prior. Your situation is providing an excuse. A push either way can tip the balance.
Nancy whimpered, squeezing Panacea's hand. She didn't even have to fake the shudder that ran through her.
"Fuck. Hey, Insect Girl. Don't cook anything. I don't want to wait longer than necessary. Too much of her body is shutting down. Just bring the stuff up here and get the hell out of the room."
Taylor froze, already halfway out of the door, her hand still on the frame. She looked over her shoulder towards Panacea. "Okay. And my name…I'm going with Weaver. But you're in my house and I don't have a mask on so…It's Taylor here."
"Just bring me the stuff," Panacea sighed.
Taylor vanished, Glory Girl following after her.
Nancy looked up at Panacea, biting her tongue as she tried to ask her silent question in the way her hand squeezed the other girl's.
"I won't tell her you're a parahuman, don't worry. Doctor/patient confidentiality." Nancy let out a breath and flopped onto her back, a small smile spreading over her face. "In return, don't you dare tell anyone what I'm about to do to help you. If you do, I will come back and I will ruin your fucking life by telling that naive idiot that you're pretending to be normal. I'll probably experiment a bit and leave you as some sort of human insect hybrid as an ironic revenge too. You screw me over, I screw you over, got it?"
Nancy nodded.
"Also…I'm not going to be able to do anything about the talking thing. There's no biological reason for it. If you want to fix that, you need to find an actual doctor or therapist."
She sighed and turned to stare at the wall. Lifting her other hand out of the blankets she gave the biokinetic a thumbs up.
"I'm not going to be coming back here. You're probably still going to have cravings for whatever he fed you. That girl can only do so much. You should, you should really go to the PRT." Nancy bit her tongue again and she could feel as Panacea stopped the convulsions from wracking her body. "If you're that scared of the ones in this city, go to the ones in Boston, or New York. But you really shouldn't keep doing this to that girl. She has no idea what she's getting into and you're both going to end up getting hurt if she keeps trying to take care of you on her own."
Panacea is trying to help. Panacea is not interested in holding the hand of a new hero or cleaning up after a potential villain.
Nancy knew that what Panacea was saying was the smart thing to do. It was probably even the right thing. Yet…Taylor was her…friend. Right? That was why Taylor was doing this for her wasn't it?
Had she ever really had a friend who would guilt trip the best healer in the country into making a house call? Sarah had had associates - people who talked with her, laughed with her, hung out with her. But they had only ever really cared about her because of her family's money or the booze she could get them. Lisa had never really known anyone long enough to have a friend.
Nancy though…Taylor was Nancy's friend. Right?
It would be best to go to the PRT in a different city. It would be best for everyone. It would be best to stay away.
But there was no guarantee that they would actually be able to help her. Or even to understand her - to take the time to understand her. To understand that she could talk, she just…couldn't…talk.
And if she went to the PRT in a different city…then she would never see her friend again.
This was fine. She would be fine. Taylor would be fine.
This was fine.
