Writer's Note:

A long time ago, a fantasy book dubbed "The Princess Bride" was released, eventually adapted into a feature length movie. A legacy was crafted by the story and a legend was born and, with the legend, an iconic line that would be remembered for years to come.

But, what would the Sonic take be like and who would say the line? Antoine... I think.

Sonic and Princess Bride belong to their respective owners.


Antoine groaned as he struggled to his feet, still dazed after slipping on the banana peel and hitting his head. His sword lay near him, he grasped the hilt as he got up on his knees. King Shadow raised an eyebrow yet smiled coldly, believing the coyote's efforts to be futile.

"My, my..." The dark hedgehog mused, "You're still trying to achieve your goal? Why not surrender now? It can spare you all the pain that lies ahead of you. To think you've pursued me your whole life in search of vengeance, that can land you in trouble."

Shadow drew his saber and struck just as Antoine got back on his feet, the Frenchman blocked the first strike and then the second, preventing King Shadow from stabbing him. He marched forward, sword raised and eager to complete his nearly twenty year long mission.

It all began back in the French town of Mercia when Antoine was a young boy, King Shadow came and asked Antoine's papa Armand to make him a special sword suitable for one with four fingers to use. Armand had done so and, after that, Shadow struck him down.

Upon Antoine's cheek was a scar from when he fought the dark hedgehog only to get beaten, times had changed. All these years later, after that lengthy journey from Mercia to here, Antoine's vengeance seemed to be in sight now.

"'Allo." Antoine whispered, "My name is Antoine D'Coolette, you smited my papi. Prepare to be vanquished." He almost slipped on another banana peel, but kicked it aside and kept balance, attacking King Shadow. Sword blades clanged, echoing in the great hall.

"'Allo." Antoine said again, advancing on King Shadow and backing him towards a table, "My name is Antoine D'Coolette, you smited my papi. Prepare to be vanquished." From the day he studied swordplay after losing his papa, Antoine had recited the line many times.

More sword clanging and, this time, Antoine kicked the dark hedgehog and knocked him against a table, Antoine lunged at him with his sword raised. King Shadow dodged and Antoine struck the table, chipping a piece off. He looked at Shadow again and poked him in the shoulder.

"Oof!" King Shadow grunted. Antoine pointed his sword at him and yelled, "'ALLO! My name is Antoine D'Coolette! You smited my papi! Prepare to be vanquished!"

"Shut up!" Shadow snarled, he was getting irritated with this coyote, having already had to deal with him decades prior and now again. As far as the hedgehog tyrant was concerned, Antoine was just as annoying as his no longer alive 'papi'.

Antoine jabbed him in the arm and advanced forward, going all out with his sword strikes and backing King Shadow into a wall. "'ALLO!" Antoine declared, "MY NAME IS ANTOINE D'COOLETTE, YOU SMITED MY PAPI, PREPARE TO BE VANQUISHED!"

"No, no, NO!" Shadow thundered, Antoine stabbed him in the other arm as he cornered him against the wall, before striking his knee. The two kept clashing with sword blades as Shadow tried to keep fighting, but he was on the ropes now, Antoine had the advantage.

"Offer me something I can't refuse." The French coyote snarled as he sliced his sword blade across King Shadow's cheek just as the dark hedgehog had done so when Antoine was a boy. "Yes!" Shadow growled, "Anything you want, I'll give it to you!"

"All I want is my papi back, you piece of merde!"

Before King Shadow could say anything, Antoine ran his sword through the dark hedgehog's heart and retracted the blade, watching as the evil hedgehog dictator collapsed to the ground.

'Just like zat, its ovair.' Antoine thought, smiling as he sheathed his sword, 'I have defeated ze four fingered black hedgehog and avenged my papi.' He frowned before saying to himself, "Now that it's over and the revenge business is done, what do I do with the rest of my life?"

Deciding to figure it out later, Antoine left the room and left King Shadow's corpse behind as he went to check on Sonic and Thrash to make sure they'd gotten to the princess and had taken care of business with Prince Snively…

The End

Note: I figured Antoine would make a great parody of Inigo Montoya. As for Shadow, I almost considered having Infinite be the Count Rugen parody stand in. Nonetheless, I had fun with this Sonic-y take on the iconic movie scene.