This one is slightly shorter than the first few chapters but I think we got what we wanted. Thank you for reading, enjoy!
Four.
Her anxiety climbed higher as Emma sat on the couch, Ruby curled up on the other end sound asleep. She was in her night gown and silk kimono she'd fell in love with the day she'd woke up in the apartment, a small blanket over her knees for warmth. It was early hours in the morning, she'd lost count of how many hours she'd been waiting. She set down her almost empty cup of tea on the table, it was the 3rd she'd drank trying to stay awake for his arrival. Checking the clock is read 3:15am. Was he actually going to come? Did he just say that to shut her up? Emma sighed and walked to the window looking out to the city debating whether or not to just take herself to bed. Blue had gone to her own room hours ago, telling Emma that Killian was very busy and try not to be upset if he had to cancel seeing her. She understood he was a busy man, but what she couldn't understand was why he'd put her in this fancy apartment with the sisters and not bothered to check up on her face to face. Yes a phone call every now and then that lasted only seconds but that wasn't the same. She wanted to see his face, see his expressions when they spoke. She wanted to see if he actually cared about anything she was saying. Anyone could lie if you couldn't see their face. She felt stupid, she shouted at the most powerful man in the city! How was he going to react when he saw her. No one was more powerful than him for miles around. Anyone that wasn't in the Black Moon clan should fear it, so why didn't Emma. She thought she did, but how could she if she could speak to Killian Black, the alpha, the way she did. She shivered at the thought of how it could all play out. She stared out of the window, letting out a low sigh. She could almost see the outskirts of her clans turf, she'd never realised how remote the Red Moon clan was. No wonder she felt so trapped there. She sat back down on the couch next to Ruby, petting her head without thinking. Ruby's ears twitched and she lifted her head turning towards the entrance door of the apartment. She must've heard something that Emma could not. Emma tensed with shock, was it him? She heard foot steps coming up the hall and stop outside their door. Ruby silently took herself out the living room and down the hallway, probably to sleep next to Blue, giving Emma some privacy which she appreciated. She heard a shaken sigh before the door opened. This was it. He was here. Her wolf was leaping inside of her. In walked a tall dark figure in the shadows of the hallway, not yet in the light of the lamp she'd left on in the living room. It was Killian, she could smell his glorious scent. Her whole body knew before her eyes even saw him, even her breathing changed. Her wolf was all ears, panting and waiting to see him, she was so tense. He stayed in the shadow of the hall way for what felt like forever.
What is he waiting for?! Her wolf cried.
Emma was frozen on the couch, she didn't want to move or speak. Then in he stepped. Oh moon goddess he's so handsome, she thought. She could barely think straight. He rid his leather jacket and lay it over the side of the couch, and wore a simple T-shirt. A simple black T-shirt that was guilty of showing off his extraordinary broad shoulders and muscular build. Before realising, Killian was already in front of her, but standing a few steps back from the sofa she sat on. He looked... exhausted. He wouldn't come close. He let out a sigh and brushed his hair through with his hands.
"Are you okay?" Emma stuttered, concerned by his worn out look.
"Yeah." He avoided her gaze. He wouldn't look anywhere near her. She felt even more awkward, not knowing what to say. Thankfully Killian stood in front of the only light source in the room, hiding her embarrassed red cheeks. She couldn't help but touch her hair nervously.
She thought back to the list she'd made in her head of all the things she'd wanted to say and ask him while he was there.
"Thank you for lending me your apartment." She almost whispered.
"It's yours." His deep voice took no care for the fact it was almost 3:30am and everyone bar them were asleep. Here we go again, she thought. Emma shuck her head.
"It's nice of you to let me stay here, but this...isn't mine."
"You don't like it?" His eyebrows rose and that darkness was back in his eyes, scaring her ever so slightly.
"No! No I... I love it, it's beautiful! That's not the issue. It's just I can't afford to buy such a place like this, and if I can't, then I can't say it's mine." She was so nervous, her voice was trembling. Why was he so intimidating? He was still stood across the table facing her, but neither of them could bare to look one another in the pool eye. What kind of a conversation was this? She thought.
"It's a present then."
"No." She could see is blue eyes turn ice cold. She'd definitely made him mad. He crossed his arms but didn't add anything. What did this silence mean? The distance between them infuriated her. She could barely contain her wolf who just wanted to run to him. Why was he so distant? He looked like he didn't want to be there, didn't want to see her. He didn't have a clue how awkward Emma felt, how intimated she felt. She felt so tiny sitting opposite him, but he was just stood there quiet and imposing, domineering the room effortlessly. She stood from the couch, tightening her kimono around her again, and stood in-front of him trembling.
"Why won't you let me go out of this building?"
"It's dangerous." He said.
"But I need to get a job, I need money."
"No you don't." She was stunned. What did he mean she didn't? She couldn't expect him to shelter her indefinitely, she need a real job getting payed real money. His short answers were starting to annoy her, and scare her. It was as if his aura suddenly turned the room darker. She wanted to step back but her wolf wouldn't allow it. Something caused a chill down her spine, something she couldn't describe the feeling. It felt like some sort of instinct, a werewolf instinct. But she was hopelessly attracted to him, which made his rejection attitude even more painful. She bit her lip trying to think of something she could do, something she could say. Why was it so difficult? She wished she knew what he was thinking. There he was, so cold and barely talking? Didn't he want her? Was this him rejecting her? Emma's body grew cold from just that thought alone.
"I need to work. I want to."
"I said no."
"LOOK AT ME!" She shuck herself silent. She just screamed. Right in Killian Blacks face. Why was she like this? She was shaking, tearing up, but she didn't care. The whole situation was impossible and she was tired of it. Tired of waiting for some sort of sign from him, tired of his distant attitude. She knew they were basically strangers, she knew she wasn't pretty or mate material, but still! Her outburst finally made him look at her, and he seemed shocked. She was even surprised by her own reaction too. She wiped the beginning of a tear away with her hand, trying to act tough, like she wasn't refraining a sob. She took a second to breath, then stared directly into his eyes.
"Why are you avoiding me like this? I... I know I'm not the girl any man would wish for as his mate, I get that! But I-"
"Emma, stop it!" She obeyed immediately, she couldn't help but obey. Killian's alpha role made her follow a direct order, her wolf instinct kicking in again. She turned her head to face the window, avoiding his gaze. This is it, she thought, he's going to reject me. She wrapped her arms around herself feeling colder than ever. She felt her wolf whimpering uncontrollably, but she couldn't tell her to stop, she felt like crying herself. But she wouldn't. She heard a sigh and felt him step closer. She shivered; unable to raise her eyes up. He stepped closer again, she wanted to step back, to run. But there she stayed, frozen and terrified. He was so close she could smell him again, it almost mesmerised her. She held her breath as Killian took one more step to stand right in front of her, so close she could feel his warmth. What was he going to do now? Scold her? Hit her? Hideous flashbacks came to Emma's mind, oh Moon Goddess, she didn't want to think about any of that at the moment.
Killian's hands raised and she tried not to flinch, but he slowly placed them round her neck. Not in a forceful, threatening manner like Neal had done many times before to her. No, Killian's touch was incredibly gentle against her skin, his thumbs caressing her cheeks. Before she could realise what was going on, she felt his lips, very softly, kiss her forehead. What was this feeling, she thought. She felt a wave of warmth flow through her body, starting from her forehead. She closed her eyes and breathed again. His lips lingered on her skin, and she raised her hand to wrap round his wrists as if she was keeping him there, close to her forever. His simple kiss chased all of Emma's worries away. She felt so many things, she was overwhelmed with emotions. She wanted to stay like this forever. The two of them so close in the dark, just the sound of the rain hitting the window. After a few seconds he pulled away, staring straight into her eyes. Their faces were so close. She felt hypnotised by the ocean that was his eyes. She saw the reflection of herself in the light of his eyes and turned her head, pulling her hair back over her scar trying helplessly to hide it. Killian grasped her hand to stop her.
"Emma don't hide it."
"But it's-"
"Don't." She looked up at him embarrassed. How was he not revolted by it? He sighed and caressed her cheek once again, brushing over her scar with his thumb.
"I don't want any other mate than you, Emma." How could she believe him. Anyone would want someone prettier than her as their mate. She had the lowest self esteem, she was ridiculously weak. She'd done nothing but tremble in fear for the 20 years she'd been alive, yet his gestures towards her were so gentle.
"Why didn't you want to see me?" She whispered. Killian sighed and took his hands off of her. He took a step back and looked away from her again. Had she said something wrong? He crossed his arms over his chest and looked at her again, seeming hesitant.
"I wanted to see you Emma, I wanted to so badly. But I could barely contain my wolf. I'm... trying to contain myself. I don't think you realise how much I'm restraining myself right now."
Oh... she thought. She turned entirely red once she understood. She felt so stupid. She supposed his wolf self would have a desire for her as his fated mate, and he was a fully grown adult. She was so embarrassed. She really didn't expect that. She suddenly remembered Dr Jekyll, he wanted her too. She knew Killian wasn't the same as that pervert but she... she was shaking as she remembered. Remembered his hands on her, his disgusting breath in her ear. She unconsciously stepped back, and Killian noticed it.
"Emma?"
"I'm okay. I just... just give me a minute, please." She took a deep breath. Killian was not Jekyll, he was her mate, not a rapist. She tried to calm herself and tell herself she was safe. What was she meant to do now? Killian clearly wanted her... that way. And she understood is was in their werewolf's nature, how their instincts wanted it. But she definitely wasn't ready for that, and there were so many things that should come first before it. How could she put it to him? She didn't want to refuse him point blank. She should be happy he didn't reject her. It wasn't that the idea of herself and Killian disgusted her, she just... she couldn't get use to the thought of them doing those type of things yet. She knew nothing of men, she hadn't even been with Neal fully like that! She knew nothing of really dating.
"Killian I... I'm not sure I..." She stuttered. Killian shuck his head.
"I don't want to force you. I do want you and I'm barely containing myself from taking you right here, right now. But I won't." Oh goodness, why did he have to be so blunt, she thought. And his poker face! She was blushing so much she had to look elsewhere. She felt boiling, it was ridiculous. She tried to get her heart rate back to normal, but it was so heard while being next to him after his confession. Should she thank him? She felt so embarrassed. She could feel his gaze on her, waiting for a reaction. Unable to come out with a proper answer she just nodded stupidly.
"Can we talk?" She asked. Her question took him by surprise, which she understood, it did come out of the blue. She fidgeted with her fingers before continuing.
"We've barely spoke more than a few sentences to each other... I just thought we could maybe talk... Get to know each other a bit more?"
"Okay."
They sat on the sofa together on either ends keeping some space between them. She hoped he wasn't getting to tired. She glanced at the clock and saw it was close to 4am. He lay his head on the back of the sofa and closed his eyes. She grabbed her cup of tea back off the table, embarrassed that she had yet to say anything since saying she'd like to talk. What could she ask? With the dark background of his there were lots of questions that she didn't dare ask. Like what it was like to be the highest and mightiest alpha for miles around, or how he became so rich. She didn't feel comfortable to ask him silly questions like what his hobbies were or his favourite movie. After pondering for a while he surprised her by being the first to talk.
"You look better." She smiled at his words, happy to see he'd noticed the changes in her, despite being very faint in her opinion.
"Yeah... I'm feeling much better. And Blues been taking my to the gym, teaching me a bit of boxing too."
"You're still very thin." She didn't disagree, she just nodded and sipped her tea. She still had a long way to go before she was as healthy as other girls her age. She felt so relaxed being in the same room as her mate. He wasn't any less intimidating to her, but his presence definitely was something her wolf needed.
"Thank you for all of this," she'd never gotten a chance to actually thank him. Looking back on her life before, she never could have imagined anything like this happening to her. Before Killian, every day was a nightmare. Working long and hard all day every day, fearing that someone might scold her or beat her for some reason or another. The days were long, straining and exhausting. She had no friends, no one to care for her, to see if she had eaten or rested. All she could do was pray the sun would go down soon so she could go hide back in her basement on her ugly old ratty couch.
"The sisters were the ones that saved you." His voice suddenly went darker. When she looked at him he was facing the wall beside him. He had that terrifying, angry look again. Was he thinking about the night they found her? She didn't want to think back to that memory again, though she still felt Neals hands around her throat, tightening, tightening, tightening while she struggled for breath. He would have killed her, she wouldn't be here if Blue and Ruby didn't find her that night. She wondered how Neal had gone from a loving boyfriend -once fiancé- to a cold hearted almost murderer.
"Blue said you won't tell us which clan you're from?" She stayed silent. She wouldn't say. They may have been cruel to her but they were still her pack. She didn't want Killian wrath unleashed on them all. Some of the members were not that bad, and no matter what, she still felt like she owed the clan somehow. She was afraid of what Killian was capable of.
"What will you do if I tell you?" It was his turn to remain silent for a while. The room stayed quiet for a minute and she turned her gaze to the glass, looking out to the darkness of the city. It was well past 4am and the rain had not stopped pouring at all.
"Did they hurt you?" Yes.
"No."
"Emma..." He knew she was lying, they both did. She just couldn't bring herself to say it. He suddenly turned to her, scaring her slightly. He looked serious, angry, but not at her. How could he be so intimidating just sitting down?
"If I let you work, will you tell me?"
"No!" She replied, shocked by his bargaining attempt. She wouldn't trade her packs lives for the sake of him letting her go out to work. She shouldn't even have to be asking him if she could go out in the first place!
"Just let me work; I'll be cautious, I promise!"
"You don't need to work."
"I do! I need money, I don't have anything!"
"Why do you need money?!" He was angry, looking at her with a menacing glare. She felt like he might shred her to pieces if she gave the wrong answer. She couldn't help but crawl back a few inches on the couch. What was wrong with him? What was he thinking?
"Killian you're scaring me."
"I asked, what do you need money for, Emma?" He was looking at her with the most terrifying look she'd seen on him yet, her whole body was shaking.
"I- I just... just don't want to ever be in need again." She stuttered anxiously. He kept looking at her for awhile before turning away. He didn't seem to realise to state he'd put her in. She understood why people feared him so much now. Even when she'd angered Victor in the past, he'd never scared her on that level. What was going to happen with Killian from now on? He was her mate, there was no getting around that. But what if she really angered him one day? Emma finally caught her breath, trying to regain some of her composure. She ran her fingers through her hair trying to relax.
"You won't." She looked back at him, still shaken from what had just happened.
"Killian... what did you think I was going to say?" She didn't really want to ask but she thought, maybe if she knew, she might understand Killian a bit better and get closer to him somehow. She barely knew anything about him, so how would she know anything without asking.
"Nothing." He was playing the silent one now. Emma sighed. They had so many secrets kept from each other, she wondered how long that would last. They must have been the two worst people to be paired as fated mates, they were basically the complete opposite of each other. A long silence followed, but she didn't really mind. She grabbed a large cushion from behind her and placed it over her knees, observing him from afar. If she looked close enough he looked tired. His dark hair was disordered, his black T-shirt wrinkled. She guessed he didn't entirely lie about it being a busy day at work.
"How is it?... With the clan?" She asked.
"Annoying." She frowned at his weird answer. He didn't look like a very enthusiastic alpha, for someone at the head of such a large pack.
"What about Graham? Why isn't he your beta?"
"Graham is the alpha of his own clan. My family wolves are not beta material." She supposed it could happen. Being an alpha usually runs in the family, and considering how intimidating Killian was, she couldn't imagine him submitting to anyone. But Graham didn't seem so dominating. She guessed his pack would be somehow allied with the Black Moon's. It wasn't unusual for large packs to split into different packs when they had to many members for one alpha to handle.
"What about your younger brother?"
"Peter is still to young. He is just training as leading hunter for now." To young? If this was the same person she thought he was, Peter didn't look much younger than herself. Maybe 2 or 3 years younger. He might have been young but Emma imagined if he was a Black brother, he could definitely be an alpha. Maybe he just looked older than he really was. Maybe he was still too immature in Killian's eyes. But if he was already lead hunter, that meant he was very well respected in his pack. Talking about alpha stuff made Emma wonder why Moon Goddess choose her to be his fated mate. Surely they had nothing in common, and she couldn't see herself as alpha material either. How could she ever stand equal to Killian Black. His pack would see her as a joke. She was the lowest member of the Red Moon clan, and now she was going to have to prove herself to the Black Moons. Was there a mistake somewhere? There had to be hundreds of other women prepared and ready for the type of job she was being told was hers. Being the mate of an alpha meant she had to be above all the other wolves. How could she ever be that wolf?
Emma woke up, realising she was back in her bed. Killian? She wondered. Did she fall asleep on the couch? After a second of panic she relaxed once noticing him sitting next to her. She felt his hand caressing her hair. She glanced at the window, seeing it was still dark out.
"What time is it?"
"About 5:30, you feel asleep so I carried you to bed. I didn't mean to wake you." She realised he was wearing his jacket again and frowned.
"Are you leaving?"
"I have to."
"When will you be back?" She asked immediately. He let out a sigh and leaned down to kiss her forehead again.
"I don't know... Soon." How soon is soon, her wolf whined. She didn't want him to go, but she knew he had other responsibilities. He caressed her hair for a few more seconds before standing and silently heading towards the door. As the door shut closed, tiredness and the sound of the rain sent her back to sleep once more.
