Chapter 6: Pardon Me


Disclaimer: I own nothing, I swear. Any pop culture references belong to the rightful owners. No infringement intended ok.


I'm not good at this, no not at all; I'm not good at this

I'm a wreck and I know it and I tend to show it every chance that I get

Pardon Me, He Is We


"Hey Doc, where are you taking us?" asked Reiner as he followed the lab coat leading them.

"Wait, you mean we aren't here for medical screening?" Berthold asked, believing that Dr. Jaeger was taking them somewhere on their day off for reasons entirely medical.

The doctor in question only laughed. "Since you two are part of the staff now, it's only right that you both get initiated properly and good news Jean's having his too so there's three of you now."

And at that moment they blatantly passed by Eren's clinic, killing any thought of this being anything remotely for health.

"Just remember…" Eren said lowly as they neared a door they've never seen before.

Reiner and Berthold lean in closer.

"…go easy on them." Was all Eren said before ripping the door open and deliberately pushing the two inside a dark room, and an ominous amount of time had to pass before the lights finally turn on…

…revealing what can only be put into words from an iconic movie.

"Fight Club…" the duo said at the same time, Reiner obviously excited at the notion and Berthold simply being tired of more violence.

"We wouldn't say that." a voice they knew belonged to Armin piped in. "It's more like a way blowing off a little steam through martial arts and male bonding by close contact sports."

Connie suddenly appeared to put a hand on Armin's shoulder, stopping him from further embarrassing himself. "What the nerd meant to say is FIGHT CLUB!" he hollered.

Which made everyone else in the vicinity go, "YEAH FIGHT CLUB!" followed by cheers and whoops that can only be defined to be purely masculine.

"You have got to be kidding me?" came Jean's time to finally voice every second of his four-week employment at the Sina Country Club.

He turned to the nutty doctor who created most of those seconds.

"This can't be how you induct new staff."

He had been forcibly dragged from his room as soon as he had eaten breakfast and had closely trailed behind him, Berthold and Reiner also thinking that they were due for their medical screenings.

But this?

The idea was obviously too stupid to be any older than a day and among the insane amounts of reasons why one can apparent, he should've been initiated sooner.

Eren's reply to that was a simple "Oh Jean," along with a show of mockingly putting his hand on his shoulder and flashing him a shit-eating smile. "Without Reiner and Bertl fighting you would be considered animal abuse."

Jean immediately grabbed him by that lab coat. "WHY YOU LITTLE-"

A bell stopped him mid-threat or curse.

"Looks like we have our first fight here, folks." Announced Thomas who, since his previous engagement with Berthold, made his part in the fight club the announcer in order to give his injuries time to heal as Eren prescribed, along with hot compress and daily dosages of analgesics for a few days.

"Eren versus Jean." He continued, and if the circumstances weren't so stupid Jean would've thought he actually had a great radio voice. "Everyone clear out as you place your bets."

And so as everyone left leaving the two combatants alone, Jean began objecting only for Eren to simply whisper a faint but audible…

"…war horse."

Having loved that movie and enough of Yeager's constant barrage of horse puns, Jean immediately agreed, getting into a fighting stance and trying his best to recall every single fight scene his seen in his life.

"Ready…Begin."

Jean carefully approached Eren in the most over the top boxing slash kung-fu slash batman impression Eren had ever seen. The latter only looked relaxed, hands behind his back in mocking superiority, making the threat of Jean being minor at best.

Jean threw in a punch.

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And then his whole universe went black.

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And then in a unit of time too fast for him to even perceive, he saw white.

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And then heard a bell.

"And…we have a winner."

Each word Thomas yelled just made Jean feel even dizzier.

"What happened?" he asked Armin as he was being dragged off the mat.

"Eren floored you -or matted, rubber matted to be more specific." Armin then went off, explaining how he had just been knocked out in the fastest time Armin had ever seen.

And on that day…the record for the fastest K.O. in Sina history became 3.57 seconds.

"So c-c-cold." Jean shivered at the feeling of ice on his new injury. Mikasa showed no mercy as she continued treating him with an apathetic face.

"Oww! Ease up…"

And then his nurse shoots him a look even colder than the ice on his face.

Jean decided to shut his mouth in response and take his treatment like a man as he watched the spectacle of human stupidity unfolding before him.

It was a new match; Berthold versus Connie, as the two never had a chance to actually do battle last time.

It was a wonder to behold, two masters (well more like gym-level instructors but anyways) re-introducing themselves to each other by the moves they've spent years of their lives learning.

Fighting someone has always been the best way of getting to know them.

Connie was never really an imposing figure, that much was certain, but his use of Taekwondo made up for his lack of…reach. Acrobatic and powerful, it had practical kicks and impressive dodges that made a short man like Connie into…a short man who knew how to kick.

And that was it.

(If one looked closely, though, they would've seen the fiery determination to leave a bruise for one reason or another.)

On the other hand, Berthold had an entirely much different relation to his preferred fighting style. It wasn't to counter a weakness, it was simply a way to channel his personality. Being shy and awkward, MMA became a way for Berthold to finally express himself.

For Connie, every bit and feeling of the taller man's kick told more about him than any of the interactions they've had in the past decade they've known each other; it was hesitant, it was calm and it had no malice, but it was steadfast and potentially masterful in its own right.

He simply knew more about him from fighting than from talking.

The two fought equally at first, yet as the exhausting style of Connie seemed to slow him down, Berthold's easily distracted mind-set made him prone to feints, a flaw Connie would not pass up.

Feigning moves and performing elaborate jumps that could (and often should) have a hidden attack was worth the energy as Berthold began losing his cool.

Connie's kicks became harder to defend against, and even harder to predict, and so the ratio between blocks and hits became too great.

Connie was winning…but just barely.

As he grew more and more exhausted, the Taekwondo instructor resorted to simpler attacks, it was then Berthold made a move, he simple bided his time, letting the acrobat use up all his energy for Bert to simply pin him to the ground and effortlessly into a hold.

Connie then decided to tap himself out, too tired to put up more of a fight.

Even though he lost (again), Connie learned much about Berthold from their fight. The two realized that as superficial as their differences were, they still were very dedicated to their martial art.

With a ring of the bell, Connie and Berthold give each other a deep bow, signaling the end of the battle.

Their fight was the best example of how a trial by fighting should be like for the rest of them.

Sadly, it was the only one.

"Alright, my turn!" Reiner said with glee as his match was up. Sadly no one seemed eager to fight him, much to his disappointment.

Then suddenly his challenger came in the form of a stuttering blond blob of awkwardness and nerd known as Armin Arlert, who was deliberately shoved into the ring by a certain equestrian instructor for one reason or another.

"Yeah, go Armin!" the crowd went wild as Armin stepped out to meet the challenge known as Death by Ass-whoop courtesy of Reiner.

If Reiner was disappointed, he didn't show it. Instead he showed honor to his opponent and got into a stance. Armin just hyperventilated.

"Begin!"

Reiner made the first move, a right jab to test the waters of Armin's skill, Armin screamed, snapping his head to the side in an attempt to dodge.

He ended up running into the fist and bloodying his nose.

To give him credit, Reiner's fist did sustain some damage.

Feeling a little guilty, the Krav Maga instructor offered to keep things even, exposing his face to whatever Armin had to throw at it, granting the much shorter blonde permission to hit him.

"Come on man, hit me with your best-gyaghh!"

The offer didn't go to waste as Armin, with all that his strength could offer, delivered a powerful punch unequal (and not to mention ridiculously disproportionate) to his feeble physique.

"Oww…I broke think I broke my hand." The smaller blonde's yelp was left totally ignored.

The punch came as such a surprise that it caught Reiner off-guard, leaving him with his muscles improperly tensed and his mouth open, and possibly even a chipped tooth as well.

"Sorry!" Armin screamed out the instant he knocked the larger man back.

And then Reiner turned back to his opponent with eyes that can only be described as an addict finally getting his fix after staying clean for far too long.

That look of bloodlust became contagious as Berthold suddenly had the same look of freedom on his previously meek appearance.

Two words.

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Just two words.

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Two simple words that seemed to have come from the Prince of Madness himself.

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Eren yelled it out to echo through the whole room.

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"BATTLE ROYALE!"

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Hell didn't break loose.

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Not at all, no.

It merely opened in a planned and coordinated wave of intense violence and stupidity.

What started out as a friendly spar soon became a drunken brawl, drunk not from alcohol but an even more intense chemical – adrenaline – where in which everyone was fighting everyone. Armin could only hide behind a piece of furniture as punches and kicks were thrown almost at random, hitting anything in the general area.

Said piece of furniture happened to be the medic table Mikasa was sitting behind, and the nurse only patted a hand on top of his blond head to soothe down his whimpering as she watched the mess unfold before her.

Reiner was like a rampaging bull, a tank of pure force, slow but unshakable with enough fire power to make most guns weep in shame, turning grown men into ragdolls with each throw of his weight.

His strength had no equal; a punch from him felt like a sledgehammer in terms of force, a kick made even the impact of a grenade implode in embarrassment.

Berthold was even worse. A literal cyclone of attack, the only safe place around him was literally where he was standing, making him an almost 360-degree field of bodily harm. Jean realized the best course of action was to avoid him at all costs.

Berthold was the unstoppable force to Reiner's immovable object.

Meanwhile Eren...well, Eren was…Eren.

If there was one word his name will forever be associated with it, it was rage.

Pure and refined rage.

For a doctor, he had no qualms in the fight, ripping his shirt to fight bare and exposed to show his injuries and constantly screaming was just the start.

It became clear to everyone, the moment he went toe-to-toe with both Reiner and Berthold, that Eren was at home with adrenaline, at home in a fight, at home with violence.

And also fucking insane.

He was the berserker in the grand scheme of chaos, the one which none can match in terms of recklessness, unpredictable in his attacks, even after he threw Connie at Reiner, using the much shorter man as a weapon, no one was still quite sure why he kept screaming…

"TITANS! TITANS! TITANS! TITANS! TITANS! TITANS! TIIIIIIIIIITAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNSSSSS !"

Jean openly gulped at the thought of such a man being the only doctor they had.

Gulped, and then DUCKED at the sight of Armin being thrown his way.

What the hell?!

"Look out, Jean!"

Impacting Jean at the speed of either a fast moving pony or a slow moving arrow, Armin crashed against the instructor, yet thankfully for him Jean caught him as he fell to the rubber mat with a loud thud.

"Jean! You broke my fall." Armin thanked frantically and groggily.

"And you broke my back." Jean groaned out quietly.

On the other side of the room turned into a battleground, one could hear Eren yell something other than the word 'titan'.

"No fair, Reiner! You can't throw Armin."

"But you threw Connie." Reiner countered, temporarily stopping his rampage.

Eren gestured to Connie, barely conscious and very injured on the mat beside him. "It's Connie."

Reiner slumped then nodded in agreement. "Well, when you put it that way."

Connie managed to lift his head off the mat long enough to yell a barely coherent "Hey!" before collapsing back onto it.

As the other two bicker verbally instead of fight physically on one side of the room, on the other side, another pair of friends had absolutely no idea how and why they were hitting each other.

Samuel and Franz were the messiest there was in the brawl; two people who had absolutely no formal training whatsoever were duking it out for reasons too stupid to even make sense.

And it was then that everyone paired up to either hit each other or hit together.

Jean did his best to avoid the fighting, but as he got knocked into one guy, another one would attack him as if inviting him to become another opponent.

All he could do in this moment was simply attack in all directions.

Attacking the empty air as if was his mortal enemy, Jean hit at nothing while making the others think he was already in some heated battle, but to the outside view free from violence, he looked strikingly similar to a man who can't swim, flailing in a kiddie pool for his dear life.

Being the only other person not hitting another person, Armin followed that tactic, throwing poor punches and kicks so sloppy that he'd look as though his underwear was far too constrictive and he was doing his best to free his testicles with elaborate movements without physically touching his junk.

The two let out a prayer of thanks as no one paid them any attention.

As the crowd of idiots high on adrenaline became more and more condensed, the room to hide was lost and Jean just had to be pushed into the crosshairs of one MMA master.

Jean tried to punch or defend along with the other staff members near the three-feet-diameter kill zone that was Berthold's reach, having back up was Jean's only advantage. More cannon fodder to go down before him, basically.

That happened sooner than Jean could've ever estimated.

As the last of the guys behind him fell flat on his ass courtesy of the damned helicopter blades Berthold dubbed his legs, Jean was left with the MMA instructor as he prepared for another blow, most definitely the last Jean might get before getting off the mat.

But despite the dread rushing through his spine in an insistent wave, and the knowledge that Berthold could (and definitely would, judging the circumstances) render him bruised and aching for the next week, Jean felt the irresistible urge to knock some teeth out.

The equestrian instructor dashed to his opponent, fist up and ready (and not to mention pathetically hoping) to come into contact with any part of the other instructor's body.

Berthold blocked then delivered his own, much better attacks.

Oh, it was a bad day to be Jean.

Then help came in the form of a crazed shirtless maniac, who tackled Berthold and knocked the both of them into the grass-fed ox named Reiner.

Eren was beyond any realm of understanding Jean had.

The man who devoted his life to heal inflicts injury instead.

Seriously, what the actual fuck was going on right now?

"That the best you got, Doc?" was Reiner's attempt to initiate banter, enjoying the fight he had with Eren.

"TITANS!" was the only reply he got back.

"…Okay I don't know how to respond to that."

Pouncing on Reiner with an almost predatory fluidity, a 180lb Eren pushed the 240lb wad of muscle that was Reiner down, pinning him using every move known only to himself. Struggling, Reiner, like the grass fed ox that he was, pushed Eren off him, sending the doctor into Berthold.

"Thank you…" Jean whispered to every deity known and unknown, as he was not only saved from Berthold's onslaught of kicking but also that the idiot Jaeger was knocked out for a while.

Not missing yet another chance to escape this growing mess of idiocy, Jean attempted to crawl out of it since anyone and everyone standing on two feet started getting thrown back and forth.

It was the safest option.

Almost out of the fight, Jean was only a few crawls away from escaping when a foot blocks his path.

Jean followed the foot up to meet the challenging eyes of Reiner, gulping with the full knowledge of what came next.

"You're not running are you, Jean?" asked Reiner as he lifted Jean up from the collar.

"What? Who, me? Nah! Just guarding myself from a reverse-cradle." Jean didn't even know what kind of move a reverse-cradle was or if it had anything to do with origami, either way Reiner seemed to accept it.

"Hey guys, look, Orangutan vs. Horse!"

Eren, suddenly back on his feet and suddenly the target to both Connie (now also standing) and Berthold, warded off a few attacks, screaming with blood in his mouth, "Show him your hooves of fury, Jean!"

Desperate and enraged, Jean just lashed out, hitting anything and anyone in his general vicinity, all while incoherently screaming, "I AM NOT A HORSE, WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO BELIEVE?!"

"The face." A voice said from behind him.

Adrenaline clouding his better judgment, Jean whipped his body to the source, fist drawn to shut the idiot up, only to be on the ground with his ass above his head instead.

From that position, Jean could see the terrified look on Berthold's face.

"A-Annie?"

Annie slowly walked in, her subtle but scary face earning her the silence of the room. Everyone paused in mid-combat at the mere sight of her, and shivered at her sight on them.

"What's going on?" she demanded-not-asked, her voice sounding too apathetic for curiosity. Several coughs came as a reply, no one man enough or crazy enough to tell her the truth about their…'past time'.

"Bertl…" she called out to her husband in a mockingly sweet manner.

"Y-Yes?" Even the tallest man in the room was vaporized to his knees at the sound of her voice, Berthold stuttering at his wife's visible signs of anger.

"A welcoming celebration." Eren said, coming to Bert's aid as fast as he came to his attack. "You know, since they're both martial arts instructors they might as well show off."

One look from Annie made Eren squirm.

"Tell her, Jean." The doctor said, pushing Jean into the crosshairs once again.

"Well you see, we all kinda got jealous when Connie fought them so we…." Jean started, discreetly backing his way back to the group for safety in numbers then shoving Armin forward for him to explain the rest.

Rubbing his shoulder, Armin proceeded. "We thought an activity where each of us could show our combat prowess would better tell of each other's personality instead of the usual boring get-togethers, emphasizing our-"

"Shut up."

"Shutting up now."

"Hey Annie," Eren suddenly started, and all the males around him immediately move and maintain a two-meter radius away from him.

No way in hell did they want to get caught up in whatever he had planned next.

The Muay Thai instructor turned to the doctor. Any lesser man would have had their spines freeze on the spot like the rest of the staff behind him. Eren only grinned wider.

"I hereby propose a challenge." He said with a hand gesture of sorts, and he took Annie's silence and now somewhat mildly curious stare as a sign to continue.

"If you can beat Reiner, Berthold and me in a round, I'll call it a day and pack up the fight club. Seems fair?"

The silence before her response was enough to suffocate everyone in the room and quite possibly a herd of innocent sheep.

(And to be quite frank, she didn't even have to lift a finger to make all the idiots stop moving. One look was enough to make freeze everyone shitless.)

And then Annie nodded before stepping on the mat.

Berthold visibly paled. "Wait, what?"

Too late. Reiner was already enthusiastically pushing him to where his wife stood.

The Krav Maga instructor was about to leave Berthold when suddenly Annie called out his name.

"Reiner."

The blond stopped in his tracks and turned back to her. "Oh, you wanna fight me first?"

Annie only shook her head as she got into a stance.

"No. The both of you."

Reiner and Berthold give each other a glance, one out of worry of harming his best friend's wife and the other out of dread of harming his own.

Both however, also had the inevitable fear of being harmed by the said woman instead of inflicting harm on her.

The crowd watched in a mixture of genuine interest and excitement when the other two on the mat assumed their respective stances, the bell ringing barely a moment afterwards.

The interest was soon turned into horror when Annie had taken down both her husband and Reiner less than a minute in.

She charged for Reiner first, using speed to make up for her lack of reach and putting Reiner in (quite literally) the same position Jean was in just moments ago before anyone could've blinked.

Berthold only raised his hands in surrender with wide eyes as she turned to him.

"I tap out."

Nobody was even sure if you can tap out without being pinned to the mat to begin with, but for once they let it slide.

Even the best fighters can turn into harmless bunny rabbits in front of their wives.

As soon as Berthold stepped off the mat, dragging a stunned Reiner along with him, Annie threw a glance at Eren.

"You're next, Quack."

Everyone could see Eren gulp as Annie returned to her infamous Muay Thai stance but that didn't seem to affect Eren's gab.

"Annie, I assure I'm a licensed doctor…this time." He whispered the last part but Jean managed to pick it up. He only flinched in place.

Annie immediately retaliated with her own comment.

"And I'm a sick of that grin, here let a poor defenseless girl knock that into a frown."

Eren assumed his stance as well.

"You and I both know you're anything but defenseless."

The bell sounded.

Eren threw a punch, Annie a kick, both meeting against their target at the same time. Annie stopped the punch with a hand and Eren blocked her shin with an arm and shoulder, dissipating the force behind the two blows.

Annie, to give her credit, reacted fast against the blow, kneeing Eren in the gut right as she lowered her kicking leg.

Eren tanked the damage, grabbing her knee and using his superior height and strength to lift Annie into the air. A classic Judo move. Right before he could drop her, however, Annie spun her torso to deliver a solid kick, shin meeting the side of Eren's head and making the doctor loosen his grip on her.

While Eren landed on wobbly legs, Annie touched the ground as gracefully as any martial artist could, a stark contrast to the barely stable Eren, who, despite the almost concussion, managed to say.

"That usually works on you…"

"You think in almost a decade I wouldn't be able to find a counter for that move?"

Eren only smiled in admiration and respect. "As expected of my master."

"DUN! DUN! DUN!"

Some in the room piece together the fragments of their conversation, and came to the unanimous decision that Eren had trained under Annie at some point in his life, and though it was a big revelation to the mystery that was both their only acting physician and their martial arts instructors, Connie had to point out:

"Armin, was that necessary?"

"It was a big reveal, so of course dramatic music was-"

Armin stopped as Annie coldly turned to him. "Didn't I tell you to shut up?"

At Armin's immediate silence, Annie nodded while saying, "That's more like it."

Though ildly amused by his best friend's antics, Eren rubbed the smile off his face, steeling himself for the fight that was in front of him.

This deserved his focus, no distractions.

It appeared to clear in everyone in the room that Eren despite being…Eren, found this as more than just a dumb for of initiation.

This was him proving how much he has improved to a teacher he probably more than respected.

The other boys, being…well, boys, could only assume.

She's his ex.

(This excluded Armin and Jean, obviously, as the Muay Thai instructor was once their ex and not Eren's. Mikasa as well, for the most obvious reasons.)

Looking at the pair face off once again, though, they might be wrong; the way they fought, the ferocity of their attacks, the blacken sides of their personalities showing…it all pointed to something else

Yup, she definitely broke up with him.

And at that moment, Eren fell into a position similar to Reiner's and Jean's not too long ago.

With even the mightiest, the fastest, and the craziest down in seconds, it appeared nothing could defeat Annie.

That was until a chill goes up everyone's spine.

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They followed the source of that eerily overwhelming killing intent, expecting Death with His scythe drawn.

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Instead they find something worse.

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Eren visibly gulped.

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"Hey, Mikasa…"

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Far worse.

They weren't sure if it was just the adrenaline still buzzing in their heads or maybe that Mikasa really was a descendant of Death Himself, but some of the boys swore on their lives that they saw a looming aura surround their nurse.

Jean however, looked to Eren and found he had an expression similar to what Berthold had a few beatings ago.

"Eren, tap out." The nurse ordered.

"Y-yes." Eren said a little too eagerly as he got back on his feet, no doubt wanting to see the two fight.

"Ackerman." Annie greeted.

"Annie." Mikasa greeted back with the same level of animosity.

Jean knew there had always been some history between these two, and that involved at least some form of violence.

He didn't have enough time to dwell on those thoughts as the two began to fight, though, and boy, did Jean not see this coming.

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It was beautiful.

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In a sick, violent, dominatrix fetish sort of way.

Two amazons of dominance attacking each other like the very fate of the universe depended on making sure the other one goes down harder than they get pushed down.

A blitz of speed and power, Mikasa was the fastest thing most failed to perceive, appearing in bursts as she dodged, only to show herself to deliver devastating attacks, making everyone in the room wonder whether or not she was practicing a martial art of sort (Connie figured it must've been Aikido or some other Japanese combat form) or if she was just that naturally gifted at…well, everything.

Annie was no push over, either. Arguably the most refined practitioner of Muay Thai most would ever see, her specialization of the brutal martial art made her a dangerous foe.

It was like chess on caffeine, every move an analogous checkmate, fast paced attacks followed by counter-attacks then blocks mixed in with dodges that weren't even human to begin with.

Everyone held their breath as the fight stretched from the first thirty seconds to the next four minutes, it felt longer and faster at the same time, even though they stopped fighting, they felt every blow that hit, every time Mikasa tasted a knee, they felt the blow, every chop to the body Annie received, the impact was shared.

No eye was focused outside the fight.

Two pairs were just more than committed to the match than the rest.

Berthold, despite not being all that big a fan of violence to begin with, cheered as his wife fought with the biggest smile any of his new coworkers had ever seen on him.

(If one were to look closely at the crowd with him, though, one could see Jean gritting his teeth and a poker-faced Connie.)

Meanwhile, anyone there could swear that Eren had looked at Mikasa that day with a look every girl dreamed of being looked at.

Causing even more doubts on how close they really were.

As the fight became more mobile, the battlefield changed from the space the crowd flocked at to the entire room, using the walls for an advantage, the two used everything they could in this friendly spar.

"I think someone should stop this." Said Berthold like the worried wif-husband he was.

"Yeah, we don't want them to hurt themselves...more." Came the surprising voice of reason known as Eren.

Looking at everyone's face, Jean knew it seemed that the decision was unanimous.

There was just one small problem.

"Who's going stop them?" At Armin's words, everyone backed even further away from the mat, obviously not brave or stupid enough to go in between the two.

Intercepting what yet another attempt to send him into the crosshairs, Jean harshly muttered, "Don't even say it, Jaeger." Eren closed his slightly open mouth with an audible and slightly disappointed pop.

"As her husband, I think I should…" Berthold began, then quickly trailing off as he heard a feral growl from his wife followed by a guttural curse about Asians. "…let her handle this herself."

"Wuss…" Eren muttered under his breath.

"What did you just call me?"

"Sorry, I meant pussy."

"You break them up then!" Berthold cried. Had any of the girls been there they would've found him absolutely adorable.

But since the room was occupied entirely by males (and that the only two women in the room were rather still rather busy), he was considered more of a wuss than anything else.

Eren accepted the plea, and walking closer to the edge of the mat. The rest of the men behind him could only watch in a mix of horror and curiosity as to what their only doctor could possibly do to stop them.

"Girls, stop." He started.

Everyone held their breath hoping that the next sentence would actually prove to be effective in stopping them…

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"I can only get so erect."

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…only to slap a palm to their faces instead.

Reiner could swear he felt the same aura that emanated from Mikasa not too long ago started to radiate from his best friend.

And Eren was left ignored.

For about ten seconds, give or take.

Mikasa must've heard him considering the fact that not long after Eren's confession of a boner, she sent the blonde crashing to the floor.

"Annie!" Berthold cried, immediately rushing to her side, Reiner not too far behind him. His wife placed a hand on one of his and Reiner's shoulders and tried to stand up.

Only to end up wincing as soon as a foot touched the ground.

The doctor sprinted to the three in a heartbeat, along with curious bystanders from the crowd.

Eren clicked his tongue at the sight of her bruised face and replaced Berthold's position at her side.

"Easy there…" he murmured as he slung an arm around her to keep her steady.

Mikasa suddenly stepped forward and spoke up. "Eren I-"

He suddenly gives her a look, and honestly no one was able to tell if it was out of anger or out of authority and professionalism as a doctor.

The nurse practically froze under his gaze.

"I can handle her very well by myself." Eren mutters as he shifts his arm a bit to get himself and Annie to a more stable position before turning back to his nurse. "You go tend to anyone else here who needs it. If you'll excuse me,"

He managed to set a steady pace for himself and the blonde towards the exit.

The crowd only watched in silence.

No one missed the way Mikasa immediately cast her gaze to the floor as she watched the pair leave before heading back to her station at the table.

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And just about everyone missed the way Eren did the same as he left.


Sasha leaned her full weight on the tree trunk behind her as she pocketed her phone, the latter already having its games beaten to their highest levels.

Why she did so in a tree, though, wasn't really a question she was willing to entertain, despite the fact that the answer practically stared her in the face every damn day since Saturday last week.

Maybe I should bring a book along with me next time, she idly thought, closing her eyes. The suddenly girl let out a small scoff, a bitter little puff of air that softly escaped her lips. Guess at this rate there will always be a next time, huh?

Not really making the move to brush the bitter thought away, the girl shifted to a more comfortable position on the tree, more than willing to get some much needed sleep while she still had time before lunch.

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The sudden burst of noise coming from the direction of the main building was more than enough to startle her

Sasha planted one hand on the branch beneath her as the other hand moved the foliage above so she could sneak a glance at the structure not too far from where she stayed.

The doors were closed, meaning that most of the ruckus was going on inside.

A brow rose on her end. Huh. I wonder what they're up to, she thought as she lied back down. I should really get some sleep before I go back to the dorm for lunch...

.

.

.

But now that she thought about it, though, she wasn't really feeling up to lunch all of a sudden.

Or coming back to the dorm altogether.


Eren stifled a small grumble as he led Annie out of the gym.

Damn. Maybe he really should've considered making their initiation a little more discreet.

Now there won't be any more fight clubs.

He spared a small glance at the blond beside him.

Only to swallow and promptly look away.

Eren cleared his throat, an attempt shove back the warmth of familiarity he felt when his eyes landed on her.

High school sure was a good time...

"It's good to know you've improved, Annie." Eren started for small talk when they were a good distance from the gym's entrance.

Annie gives him a small smile. "And it's good to see you three are still together."

He chuckles, and from the corner of his eye he sees her smile widening just the smallest bit as well. "Well, there wasn't really any stopping them from following me out here."

"And by them you really just mean her, don't you?"

Eren only smiled guiltily. "Yeah." he swapped his glance forward for a moment. Only a handful of feet left until they reach the infirmary. Eren turned back to Annie in all professionalism.

"Is your arm still stinging? And are there any other parts of your body that ache?"

Annie managed a nod. "Yeah. But it's bearable. My foot doesn't really feel very attached to my body, though."

The doctor opened the door and led her inside with another chuckle. "And here I thought your sense of humor would've improved in the past decade." he said as he shut the door behind them and lead her closer to the beds.

"Don't even start with me, Quack." Annie threatened, but Eren knew it was just her version of a joke than anything else.

"Yes, Ma'am." he said with a smile as he propped her on the headrest of the infirmary beds with practiced ease.

He grabbed a pillow from the bed beside hers to rest behind her back. "Just stay there. I'll be back in a bit." Annie gave him a short nod, just a downward jerk of her chin as she set her full weight on the cushion behind her.

He only disappeared for a minute or so before returning with disinfectant and a roll of bandages from the nearby counter. Eren immediately surveyed the injuries on her body.

Her arms are pretty beaten up and she has a particularly bad skin abrasion on her left arm, probably from where she landed on the rubber mat. She has another one on her forehead but it isn't all too bad…hmm I had to help her get here so maybe she strained her ankle…

Eren moved his gaze to her feet and sighed.

Nope, definitely a sprain. I knew I should've checked on that first. Her right ankle's pretty swollen. I'm pretty sure she was still able to put a little weight on it though...so maybe it's not all that serious?

The doctor sighed again.

But still. A sprained ankle and moderately bruised arms? Did Mikasa hit you harder than I thought?

Eren turned back to Annie with a small smile. "I'm gonna have to leave you again for a bit. Just need to get something for your ankle." He said as he set the supplies he had on the nightstand beside her.

"Alright." Was the blonde's short answer.

Eren gave her another small smile before making his way back out the curtain, immediately rushing to his desk to put rub some alcohol on his hands.

It was when he opened one of the drawers of the medicine cabinet that he realized that his face was heating up.

Hmm. I must be coming up with a fever or something.

After getting the leg brace and shutting the drawer, Eren made his way to the fridge. Once he retrieved the ice pack from the freezer the doctor stuck his head inside the frozen cabinet for a few seconds.

This should cool me off.

Eren let out a contented sigh as he removed his head from the cooler and shut it closed.

Much better.

Eren grinned as he went back to Annie, brace and ice pack carefully carried in his arms.

By the time she was in view, he noticed that she focused her gaze out the nearby window.

Eren immediately got to work after repositioning the stool closer to the foot end of the bed. He began by applying the cold compress on her ankle, making sure to only let it rest on the affected area for a few moments before easing the brace over her dainty foot with practiced ease. He stood up and reached for the pillows on the bed beside Annie's to pile them under her leg to elevate her sprain.

Eren turned to her as he moved the stool closer to the head of the bed.

"You got yourself a nasty sprain there. It's not all too bad but it'll still take a week or two to completely heal." He said as he sat down and reached for the supplies behind him. "Think you can sit up? Still need to tend the rest of your injuries." Eren lightly gestured to his head and arms for emphasis.

Annie nodded. "Yeah, hold on."

She shifted to lift her upper body off the mattress by propping herself up by her elbows against the headboard, but the recent injury on her upper arm made her swallow back a groan as it came into contact with the hard surface behind her and she almost fell flat on her back.

Almost being the key word.

Eren only sighed as he helped her up to lean on the upper bed frame. "Still a little too stubborn to ask for help, huh? You really could've just asked."

For some strange reason the blonde nodded, as if accepting an offer. "Right."

Eren let out another sigh as he began to pour antiseptic on a cotton ball before turning back to Annie. His eyes immediately focused on the patch of red on her forehead.

Her hair's in the way. Might irritate the wound…

"Umm Annie? Mind moving your bangs? It's kind of in the way."

Silently, she brushed the lock of blonde fringe behind her ear as she averted her gaze towards the window.

The doctor immediately got to work and began to gently dab the cotton on her wound, all while internally grumbling as he felt heat rush up his face once more.

Get a hold of yourself, Eren, this is standard procedure.

Another, somewhat snarkier voice in his already fucked-up conscience countered.

Yeah sure, standard procedure on the girl you trained with back in high school.

Eren felt the first inner voice scoff, and stopped moving his hand as soon as the entire wound had been cleaned.

Only to immensely regret it as soon as his eyes locked with hers.

By whatever plans the gods had for him, Annie chose that exact moment to turn her eyes back to him.

Eren felt his breath hitch in his throat and his senses slow as dulled jade met icy sapphire.

Her eyes…

.

.

.

I almost forgot what they looked like…

.

.

.

Bluer than the sky and sea put together…

.

.

.

"Am I interrupting something?"

Eren could've sworn his bones broke all known laws of anatomy and leapt in place against his skin as he jolted his back straight at the sound of Mikasa's voice. He warily turned to his assistant who was idly standing at the foot of the bed.

Had she been standing there the whole time? How the hell did I not hear her?

"Mikasa! I didn't see you come in!"

Through her usual deadpan facial expression Eren could see that she wanted to say something, but instead chose to remain silent as she walked over to him. She gave Annie a short glance before turning back to Eren.

"You haven't tended to her arms yet, Eren."

"I was actually gonna-"

"Don't worry, I'm on it." Mikasa stated as she grabbed the bottle of disinfectant from the nightstand and began to open it as she moved to the opposite side of the bed.

"Mikasa, you should really get some cotton first-"

"Here," The nurse cut him off as she mercilessly poured some of the bottle's contents on Annie's injuries.

The blonde hissed but said nothing.

"Feeling better?" Mikasa asked, her usual expression obviously concealing the death glare in her eyes.

"Yes. Thank you." Annie replied through gritted teeth.

Eren sweat-dropped. Mikasa suddenly turned to him.

"I'll take over here. You should get yourself something to eat, everyone else is already having lunch."

"Oh. Okay." The doctor said, albeit a little confused at Mikasa's sudden insistence to take over for him. He shook his head free of the thought and turned to Annie.

"Well, I guess I'll be off. No need to worry Annie, you're in good hands." He shifted his gaze over to Mikasa. "You haven't eaten yet, have you?" When the raven shook her head, Eren smiled. "Then I'll make sure that there'd still be some leftover in case you'll take a while here."

She nodded with a small smile, the same smile he had grown oh-so familiar with and fond of, now finally back after the past few days of her blunt sarcasm and spacing out. Whichever the case, he took both of her responses as confirmation to head out of the clinic, making sure to gently shut the door behind him.

Wow, he thought as he turned the hallway and entered the lobby. Mikasa sure seems to care about Annie. And to think we haven't seen each other for almost a decade.

With a small stagger in his pace, he made his way out the glass doors and into the lodging, wincing every few steps as his back ached in protest of his movements.

Dammit, Reiner you really wiped the floor with me back there, Eren thought with another wince. I should probably check his medical records to make sure he isn't half ape or something.

He let out a sigh as he entered the dorm common room, the familiar scent of ham wafting down from the kitchen and into his nostrils making his stomach grumble.

By the time he got to the dining table, Jean, Armin, Reiner, Berthold and Connie were happily chatting away as they dug into their lunch. Each of them had their own gauze over their bodies, the most obvious one being the dressing around Armin's forehead and the bindings all over Connie's arms.

"Hey, Eren." The blonde said as soon as his eyes landed on him, the others immediately following suit with their own greeting. Eren gave them all a smile as he sat himself down beside Connie.

"You alright there, Doc? I didn't overdo it now, did I?" Reiner asked with a teasing smirk as he reached for his glass of water.

Eren only shook as his head as he reached for a sandwich off the plate in the middle of the table. "Not really. But I'm pretty sure I'll be waking up with the worst kinds of cramps tomorrow morning. Nothing a couple pain relief patches can't fix, though." He punctuated his sentence with a big bite of his sandwich. He swallowed before continuing. "Did Mikasa patch you up?"

Everyone gave their words of affirmation.

Reiner nodded. "Yeah. She's pretty good at what she does."

"Mm-hm. She even gave everyone Advil before we left." Connie added, holding up a sachet of what Eren immediately knew to be pain relievers.

"How's Annie? I thought you were with her in the infirmary?" Berthold asked.

Eren swallowed another bite before replying. "She'll be fine. She sprained her ankle from her fall though, so she has to keep off it for a week or two. Not to worry, we have enough supplies for that so no need to transfer her out to a hospital." At this Berthold nodded. "Mikasa's up there with her right now. You can visit as soon as she's done." The doctor added as an afterthought.

The whole table froze. If the doctor hadn't looked down to take another bite of his food he would've seen the priceless looks on his friends' faces.

Jean's eyes practically bulged from their sockets, sandwich a few mere inches away from his dropped jaw.

Armin had the misfortune to have been drinking water when Eren spoke and promptly spat the liquid back into his cup before setting it back down on the table with an audible slam.

Connie actually choked but managed to dislodge whatever was in his throat with a cough before he killed himself, all while sniggering at the prospect of another dominatrix death battle coming into place.

Lastly, Reiner and Berthold swapped looks that held both concern and fear, both knowing full well what both women were capable of and of the obvious tension between the two, Berthold suddenly sweating up a storm.

"You sure about that, Jaeger? I didn't hear any sounds of violence when I was in the Main Building." Levi's voice suddenly echoing from where he stood by the fridge made Eren look up from his eating.

"How long have you been standing there, exactly?" Jean asked.

"Long enough. Kindly tell all your fellow fight clubbers that all the girls' chores for the night will be transferred to them." The boys sighed but nodded in surrender. The supervisor made a move exit the kitchen and head back to the common room but not before giving the boys at the table one last glance.

"Oh, and you lot. Once those two are done back in the infirmary I expect the six of you to clean up whatever's left of it. Am I understood?"

Five out of the six nodded miserably as Levi left.

Eren only cocked his head to the side. "You guys…mind explaining just what exactly did Levi mean by that?"

As if on cue everyone else at the table let out a groan. Jean slapped his palm to his forehead before he spoke.

Or ranted, rather.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Eren, I've known you for more than a decade and a half, just how much more oblivious can you get?!" the equestrian instructor asked as he dragged his hand lower and lower down his face in a mix of frustration and misery.

The rest of the boys spoke up as well.

"Yeah, Doc, are you really not getting it? I'm half sure that a brick wall can pick up the signs better than you."

"I hate to tell you this but Reiner has a point. You're pretty clueless for a doctor."

"Yeah man, you redefined what it means to be dense."

"Yeah, and your overall density rivals that of Osmium!"

"…"

"…"

Everyone at the table turned to look at Armin who all but flushed as soon as they had gone silent.

Connie sighed. "You're not really helping, Armin."

The blonde chuckled with a sheepish smile. "Heh. Sorry."

The buzz-cut waved his hand in front of Armin as if to dismiss him. "Whatever man. But still." He turned to Eren with furrowed brows. "You sure you don't know, bro?"

Eren only shrugged. "What am I not knowing?" he asked as he spared everyone a questioningly innocent glance. "Oh and I get the chemistry analogy, Armin. Nicely done." He said, pointing to Armin, the latter smiling in gratitude.

Suddenly Jean let out a very long, very audible sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose before turning to the table's other occupants.

It had to be done. Now.

He turned to the others, almost as if making a unanimous decision.

"I'm telling him."


Mikasa hadn't dared look up at her patient once.

Instead she opted to keep her eyes on Annie's arms as she continued to tend to the other girl a lot more…forceful than she should.

Around what felt like the third time Mikasa yanked on a bandage a little too hard and left a small chafe on her skin, the blonde sighed.

"Look Mikasa, we could do this two ways: I could either put it on and punch you square on the jaw so it'll leave a rectangular imprint there for you to be reminded for weeks, or I could just show it to you now to save time and effort."

The raven was initially confused when the other girl began digging inside her shirt until Annie suddenly produced a long silver chain from it.

And then she felt her veins freeze as soon as she caught sight of the pendant that hung from it.

A simple gold ring with engraving inside of it.

Mikasa squinted to get a closer look.

Annie and Berthold. Always.

She didn't really need to read the engraving to get the message straight across, though.

"Oh." Was the only thing she managed to utter, teeth immediately gnawing into her lower lip as she felt heat rise up to her face in embarrassment.

So she was the Annie Sasha was talking about the entire time? Why did I forget?

"I'm sorry."

Annie only nodded and proceeded to stuff the necklace back into her shirt.

"Glad you finally caught on."


Connie immediately nodded in response to Jean's proposal. "In the words of Shia Labeouf, do it."

Reiner and Berthold silently nodded as well.

Armin was a little more hesitant. "Jean, I'm pretty sure we should leave that to her instead-"

"Armin, she literally, literally, just sent a girl to the infirmary. I'm pretty sure that-"

"If you all were referring to Mikasa's feelings for me I'll have you know that I've known for years."

"-telling him right now would be completely- wait, what?" Jean snapped his head to face Eren so fast his neck made an audible pop.

Eren only shrugged. "I've known since we were in high school."

By now Jean was in such a state of shock he was beyond any capability of speaking coherently.

"What – why – how? HOW?"

The doctor pointed to himself and gestured to all of his head and upper body. "Umm? Doctor at age nineteen? Certified genius?" he leaned in closer to Jean and widened his gestures. "Two PhD's? Youngest doctor in the state? Inventor of a serum that makes tigers and lions as tame as horses?"

"Wait, wha-"

"Genius? Geniuuuus?" Eren dragged out the last syllable of the word as his method of bragging to prove a point. "I don't wear the lab coat for nothing, Horse-face."

The equestrian instructor swatted him away with a hand. The doctor only reeled back as Jean let out a sigh, the latter still probably absorbing the apparent grenade of a revelation on him.

Armin spoke up.

"Eren, if you knew the entire time why didn't you say anything?"

"You never asked. Also, Mikasa can make you spit out just about anything if she tried hard enough. Honestly. If it weren't for Sasha, she'd be having girl talks with you instead."

Eren smirked at how the blond shivered at his words only for it to widen upon seeing how Jean flinched at the mention of the archer's name.

Bull's eye.

"Wait," Connie raised his hand as if trying to process everything that had just happened in the past minute.

"So you're telling me that for at least the past decade you've known how in love she is with you…yet you didn't bother letting her know?" The buzz-cut threw his hand up in the ultimate 'what the hell' gesture. "Jesus fucking Christ-"

"If she knew that I knew, she'll just keep trying harder to be with me."

Eren let out a bitter chuckle and casted his gaze downwards.

And then the table went silent, both in shock and confusion of what he just said.

Suddenly Berthold's voice filled Eren's ears with a question that had him visibly flinch in place.

One that he had dreaded to hear out loud ever since he fit all the pieces more than a decade ago.

.

.

.

"Do you love her back, though?"

.

.

.

The doctor felt himself stiffen as the question hung heavily in the air, waiting for an answer.

The rest of the males at the table gave him an expectant glance.

Eren let out a sigh.

"How could I ever tell her? In fact, how could she even dare to love me? I torture and experiment on people, animals and Jean on a regular basis."

"Oi, what the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"I'm still having trouble classifying your species." Eren immediately supplied as he turned to Jean. He waited for the other boy to angrily deflate back in his seat before continuing.

"The point is she deserves better than a psychotic maniac like me."

Eren shot Jean a look when he let out a cough that suspiciously sounded an awful lot like 'You're damn right she does' but whatever retort he had planned to say was cut short when Reiner hummed.

"You know, Doc, we asked if you loved her back. Not if she had feelings for you. The answer for that was already clear from the start."

Berthold nodded. "It's a yes or no question, Eren." He offered him a smile. "I'll ask you again. Do you love her?"

Eren let his gaze drift out the kitchen window and his mind wander just a little bit before answering.

This was Mikasa he was talking about.

This was the woman who helped him climb the ladder of success by pushing his sorry ass up it until he reached the top.

The prodigy he had envied since they were children who chose not to hone her talents and pursue a doctor's degree and instead became a nurse just so that she could stay by his side.

The girl who had put up with all his antics, brushed off his flaws and (amazingly enough,) loved him ever since he wrapped a scarf around her neck all those years ago.

Eren felt the smallest of smiles tug at the corners of his mouth.

"I'm pretty sure you already know the answer to that."


Mikasa chose to remain silent as she continued to tend to Annie's wounds (the very same ones she inflicted, she realized) a lot more gently than when she started. She was almost finished wrapping the bandages around her arm when Annie suddenly sighed.

"I'm aware that I can be classified as the coldest-looking person you know-"

"That's for damn sure."

Annie was about to shoot Mikasa a look but instead ended up smiling when she saw the raven stifling laughter behind her scarf.

"Alright, alright." Annie said. "No need to get snippy with me. I can still kick your ass."

"Do I need to remind you who gave you these injuries?" Mikasa asked as she tightened the bindings on Annie's arm one last time. "Sorry about the leg by the way."

"Touché. And no worries. Been a while since I've gotten in this kind of shape. It's kind of refreshing."

Mikasa only smiled. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind."

The nurse stood up to move to Annie's opposite side. "You were saying?" she said as she started to tend to the wounds on Annie's other arm.

"You're in love with him."

Annie didn't feel the need to flat out say who exactly she was talking about. Her statement wasn't even a question awaiting confirmation.

It was a direct statement of a fact.

Mikasa froze in the middle of dabbing iodine on an injury for a split second.

Anyone else would've missed it.

"Annie-"

But Annie knew better.

"You'd have to be completely stupid not to notice it. In this case, doctor or not, Eren's an idiot."

Mikasa looked up from her work.

"Hey."

Annie gave her a look that said don't even think about it.

It was strange, really.

Just a little over half an hour ago they were practically a hair's width close to beating each other to death.

Now they were talking about a boy of all things like they've been friends for ages.

Girls rarely ever made sense.

Oh well.

Annie shook her head. "He's as dense as Mercury, you can't deny that."

The nurse only let out a sigh. "I've loved him for more than a decade, you think I wouldn't have known that by now?"

The blonde watched Mikasa as she began to wrap dressing around her arm.

"Do you get tired of it?"

"Of how oblivious he is?" The raven questioned back, not even bothering to look back up.

"Of still being in love with him despite that?"

Mikasa paused before securing the gauze with tape and shook her head, a small but defeated sigh escaping her lips as she smiled sadly.

"I don't think I ever will."

Annie only placed her other hand on Mikasa's shoulder, prompting the other girl to meet her gaze.

"Then that's just all the more reason to tell him."


Instead of silently smiling and nodding like the rest of the table's occupants, Jean spoke up in response to Eren's makeshift confession.

"You know, if you told her about that sooner none of us would've been spectator to that death battle between Annie and Mikasa."

Eren furrowed his brows. "Okay, now I'm confused. What the hell are you talking about?"

Connie lifted his hands in an 'are you kidding me?' gesture. "Umm? Mikasa practically destroying Annie on the mat out of jealousy? Didn't you say something about Annie being your old master or some shit like that?"

"Yeah but it's not like I actually tried to get to her. Sure I had a little crush on her but we just talked a lot. I did shifts at the nurse's office in high school and she had to come in from time to time with bruised knuckles and all that stuff. I thought that Mikasa was going all out on her coz she practically floored me, not out of that stupid crush. And besides," Eren turned to Berthold with a smile. "No way I'd still have a stupid crush on her until now. Especially not when she's already someone's wife."

From the corner of his eye Eren could've sworn that Jean flinched in place but he paid it no heed. Berthold gave him a smile and nod as if in gratitude.

Connie's voice broke whatever masculine sentimentality had sparked between the two, though.

"Do you think Mikasa knows, though? I know for a fact Annie wouldn't dare wear her ring to a match."

Eren abruptly stood up. "Only one way to find out."

"Doc, where are you going?" Reiner called after him.

The doctor turned to him briefly before walking out the dining room en route to the main building. "I still have to clean up after that mess we made. And besides," he grinned before walking away.

"I have something very important to tell my assistant."

While the men that surrounded him gave Eren the encouraging whoop as he exited the kitchen, Jean could only watch with a small scowl.

Honestly. Took him long enough.

As soon as the boys at the table calmed down, Armin immediately spoke up.

"To be honest, I expected for well…anything but…that. I'm really happy for the both of them."

Everyone nodded.

"Yeah, took him long enough."

"We've only been here for days and already we could tell they had a history." Reiner said, to which Berthold nodded to in agreement.

"Yeah. I'm happy for Mikasa as well." Berthold said, and everyone turned to him in curiosity.

"Hm?"

The MMA instructor stuttered under the sudden attention before answering, "W-well yeah. Having feelings for someone that long can be great and all, but having them for someone you've been that close to can be torture. It's great for Mikasa that Eren knew about them the entire time."

Jean fell silent and dug his teeth into his bottom lip. He swapped a glance at Connie.

The buzz-cut had the same idea and glanced at him as well with the same look in their eyes.

Are you fucking kidding me?!

Connie only rolled his eyes in irritation, his way of ending their moment of optical conversation as he turned back to his sandwich.

Not wanting to make a sequel to their earlier confrontation, Jean decided to stay put in his chair, hand fisting into the fabric of his jeans in a deadly grip as he glared at the MMA instructor.

You go around spouting crap like that when you're the most clueless person here?

Lucky enough for Berthold that he decided to keep his attention to his food.

The look Jean was giving him was more than enough to melt steel.

Goddamit, Berthold, maybe you should listen to your own statements once in a while.

.

.

.

Little did Jean know that his glare didn't escape the line of sight of a certain blonde fellow at the table.


Mikasa left Annie in the infirmary as soon as she had done one last once-over the blonde's injuries (and not to mention received an exasperated 'Just go already!' from said girl), and after settling things with Levi and Hanji concerning the Muay Thai coach's current…condition, she set out to the gym to pack up whatever other supplies she had left there earlier.

What she didn't expect was Eren already being inside, putting the mat and other equipment in the gym back to their original positions. Even the small puddle of blood she remembered seeing on the floor before she left the gym was already mopped clean.

Did I really take that long?

Eren immediately sensed her presence as soon as she arrived. "Hey," he said, turning to her for a brief moment before turning back to his work. "I kinda already started. Think you can clean up the table while I work on putting the place back together? This was mostly my idea anyways."

Mikasa nodded as she began to make her way to the table. "Yeah."

As much as she tried to focus on the task she had at hand, she just couldn't keep her thoughts from running all over the place.

That's just all the more reason to tell him, Annie's voice seemed to reverberate through her subconscious.

Was now even a good time?

As soon as she placed all the extra nursing supplies in the first aid kit and tidied up the table to a respectable level, Mikasa turned to look at Eren.

His back was still turned to her but he wasn't all too far from her.

He would still be able to hear her even if she whispered it.

"I'm sorry about Annie by the way." She started, not exactly feeling like baring her entire soul to him just yet.

He only nods. "It's alright. Great fight though. I honestly thought you were getting out of shape." He said with a short chuckle of sorts before draining back to silence.

Mikasa only bit her lip, not exactly finding the will or ability to laugh or even nod along.

.

.

.

That's just all the more reason to tell him, a voice once again said.

.

.

.

And this time it was her own.

.

.

.

She took in a deep breath, letting her instincts take over and saying the first thing that came to mind.

.

.

.

"I love you, Eren."

.

.

.

What the actual fuck, Mikasa. Way to go.

Instead of violently reacting like she expected him to, Eren only answered back.

"I know."

He didn't even bother turning to face her.

Internal cursing immediately forgotten, Mikasa let out over a decade's worth of exasperation in one heavy sigh. "That's not what I meant. Eren, I love you more than-"

"I know."

She could've sworn she felt the blood that circulated around the veins in her face actually stop moving.

He…knew…?

Once again Mikasa was reduced to a monosyllabic response as she felt her pulse thrum louder and louder against her ears.

"Oh."

Eren suddenly stopped putting the mat in place and let out a sigh. "If you're asking me to take our relationship further, the answer is no."

Mikasa swallowed what felt like a rock in her throat and nodded in a way that almost looked frantic.

The raven haired girl was always labeled as calm. Level-headed. Stoic, even. But now she was flushed a bright red as she blabbered.

"It's alright don't worry about it I was expecting anything really-"

"You didn't let me finish."

The girl suddenly stopped in her tracks with wide eyes. "Huh?"

Eren didn't face her but he hadn't dared moved from his spot either. "You said- or at least you tried to say anyways- that you love me more than as your best friend or as your brother or whatever. Let me tell you that I've known for years and that I figured that the only chance that you'd actually tell me is when you finally worked up the guts to ask if we can take things further. And my answer is no."

Mikasa only hummed; a sound of bitter agreement and acceptance.

Of course.

She let out a long exhale.

Then suddenly all the air that she had released then didn't make a return trip as he turned to face her.

"No because I'm literally, socially and medically considered as a sadistic psychopath." His eyes were pained as he let out a bitter chuckle. "No because you deserve better than not using your talents to their full extent just to stay beside a lunatic like me. No because it's me we're talking about, Mikasa. Me. Disease-eradicating obsessed, constantly-testing-on-live-humans-and-animals, practically insane me." He chuckled again, a sound that made Mikasa's heart pulsate painfully in her chest but at the same time brought a furrow to her brows.

He fiddled with the hem of his shirt and sighed. "But if you're wondering if I feel the same way," he looked up to face her this time, and there was something in his eyes that she couldn't quite read.

In all the years she had known and loved Eren Jaeger, not once had she ever seen that look.

Ever.

"Has it ever occurred to you that not once have I ever done any of my experiments on you?" he strode over closer to her, and Mikasa was stuck into place as she felt another lump in her throat stop her from breathing.

"I've done tests on pigs and horses."

He took a step forward.

"I constantly spike up and measure the stress levels of all the employees here."

Another step.

"I experimented on Armin in his sleep even, and he's my best friend."

Another step.

By now he was standing directly in front of her and Mikasa instinctively slammed her eyes shut as she felt her face burn from the close proximity.

"Whatareyoutryingtosay?"

She wasn't even sure if what she had just said was even coherent.

Mikasa heard him sigh, and felt his hands landing on either side of her, trapping her between him and the table behind her.

"What I'm trying to say here, Mikasa, is that you're an exception. And that you probably always will be an exception."

He sighed again, and she felt his breath ghosting on her face. "You're precious to me a lot more than I admit. A lot more than I want to admit. But for reasons I already told you, no, I'm not going to take things further with you. I've been holding myself back. You need to understand that."

Her heart still hasn't stopped hammering against her ribcage and she still felt the lump in her throat stopping her from speaking and breathing.

You need to calm yourself down, Mikasa. She thought as she tried to regain some air back into her lungs.

Once she was sure that her breathing was back to normal she opened her eyes.

.

.

.

Only to find his wide open and staring back at her.

.

.

.

Their breaths mingled together.

.

.

.

He was only a centimeter away.

.

.

.

Suddenly he turned away, hands fisting against the edge of the table and eyes turned away to focus on the wall to his left.

"I can't."

Mikasa felt her arms move before she even told them to.

Her hands reached up to cup the sides of his face and gently coax him to face her again.

"Mikasa…don't." he said as their eyes met once more. His voice was low and rough, a hoarse whisper cutting the silence in the empty room like a knife.

Mikasa bit her lip. "Eren…"

"I won't be able to hold back anymore." he said, words practically straining out of his throat.

The words slipped out of her mouth before she even realized what she was saying.

"I don't want you to."

In that moment Mikasa noticed something snap inside of him with a flicker of his eyes, and before she even registered it his arms had wrapped themselves around her waist to crush her body to his and his lips moved forward to meet hers.

Her reaction was almost immediate. Her eyes fluttered close and she wrapped her arms around her neck before she let out a small yelp of surprise against his lips when he suddenly lifted her off her feet to sit on the table behind her.

Mikasa let her fingers tangle themselves into his hair and her knees connect with his hips, eliciting a low groan from the back of Eren's throat. Their lips moved against the others' with such urgency that no one would've guessed that this was the very first kiss they ever shared with each other.

The very first kiss they ever shared with anyone, really.

It was only when the two of them had started to feel lightheaded from the lack of oxygen that they pulled away, heavily panting but in no rush to move from their position or in the state of mind to think so.

Eren rested his forehead against Mikasa's, gasping for air as he spoke, his voice still rough but happier sounding.

"I've wanted to do that for so long."

Mikasa felt the corners of her mouth twitch up into a smile. "How much more for me?"

The doctor pulled himself away from her forehead and smiled back before nodding to the doors behind him.

"We should head back."

The girl managed a nod and then let out a small yelp of surprise when he helped her off the table by the waist.

Mikasa gave the gym one last once-over. The place seemed clean enough. There were still a couple pieces of equipment out of place but it was nothing Reiner and Connie couldn't pick up after before sessions started.

With a smile she let Eren lead her out the gym and main building and back inside the dorms, and when any of their coworkers caught sight of their entwined fingers, they only smiled in giddy relief.

Levi voiced for everyone's thoughts as soon as he saw her and Eren in the common room.

"It was about damn time." From where she stood, Mikasa saw Petra smiling widely behind her fiancé.

"Yeah," Eren said with another one of those dazzling smiles up on his face as he turned to Mikasa and squeezed their fingers together a little tighter.

"It was."


The briefing later that night was a lot less eventful compared to the last one.

Jean chalked it up to the fact that there weren't new additions to staff introduced and that Levi spent a good half of it scolding the staff's male population like a strict father but then again he could be wrong.

He does feel a little guilty for skipping out on the details for Bonfire Night and the upcoming wedding but it was nothing he couldn't ask Connie or Thomas about.

He had other, more important things in mind than the new chore arrangement and the club's upcoming events.

Like for example, the brunette who stood not too far from where he did, head turned to face the manager but eyes looking everywhere but.

Jean gritted his teeth to stifle back a sigh and waited for the crowd to disperse before making the move to approach Mikasa and Connie. Lucky enough for him, the two weren't all that far from each other as they moved.

"Hey," Jean called in a voice he hoped wasn't all too loud.

The two of them turned to his voice, thankfully enough, but the instructor couldn't help but scowl at how Eren turned around as well.

"Something the matter, Horse-face?"

Jean opened his mouth, insult already at the tip of his tongue only to end up closing it as soon as Mikasa gave her (new?) boyfriend a short glance. For reasons Jean didn't understand (yet soon figured out in a blink), that was enough to make Eren nod and relent.

"Okay." he said, pecking Mikasa on the cheek and whispering something into her ear as he went along.

The nurse only nodded and reddened.

Jean and Connie had to resist smirking knowingly.

"So," Mikasa started, an obvious effort to divert the attention from herself. "What's wrong?"

"I'm pretty sure you already know." the buzz-cut said, suddenly in all seriousness.

"Oh. Right. Sorry."

Jean only waved her off, completely understanding her...current state of mind. "S'alright."

To be quite honest, if he had witnessed this state of her any other time, he would've found it adorable. Would've been taken aback, even.

But for now the teasing could wait.

They had a bigger issue at hand.

He gave the entire room a once over before turning back to his friends and huddling a little closer and minimizing the volume of his voice. The other two followed suit and leaned in as well.

"Mind if we talk after dinner?" he asked, eyes darting back and forth between Connie and Mikasa. "Just us three, I mean." he added.

The pair before him nodded instantaneously.

"Of course." the girl said. "Anything."

Connie nodded to Mikasa in agreement. "Same goes for me, bro. You really should've figured as much by now,"

The equestrian instructor only nodded gratefully. "Good to hear."

Not long after that, the girl excused herself to go back to Eren and Armin, leaving Connie and Jean alone.

Silence lapsed between the two for a few moments

"You know," The buzz-cut said, as he turned to his fellow instructor. "I actually planned for us to meet up after dinner as well. You just beat me to it. Good thinking." he patted a hand onto Jean's shoulder.

"Yeah. Sure thing, man."

"All the more reason for you to show concern for the girl you like."

"Yeah- what?"

Jean turned to glare at Connie who all but grinned as he started walking away.

"Nothing. Come on, dinner's starting."

Petra actually called already? Huh.

Jean gave the table a once over before taking a seat.

And just as he was a mere inch away from pulling back a chair, he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Con?"

The buzz-cut only gestured to an empty seat he had held onto with his other hand, right beside where Sasha sat.

Jean only raised a brow.

Connie gestured to it again. "It'd be better if you're the one beside her."

Something about the way Connie was looking at him told him that he wasn't going to take no for an answer.

With a sigh, Jean nodded and let go of the seat still in his hand.

"Fine." He mumbled as he made his way over.

Connie only patted him in the shoulder, almost as if in thanks. He glanced in reply before turning back to the seat.

Jean had to fight the urge to frown at the sight of her. Sasha had her head down, not really bothering to speak to anyone even if her roommate and her other female coworkers were just across from her.

"Hey." he greeted as he sat himself down.

She jumped in place as she turned to him, almost as if she was startled.

"H-hey." Sasha said, giving him a small smile.

He immediately noticed the way she eyed the night's meal warily as soon as she turned away from him.

Jean tore his gaze away for a moment, passing food and utensils to the people beside him as dinner started.

And in this, he noticed that not once did he have to pass anything to Sasha, nor did he even hear her ask for anything.

He stole a glance at her plate.

It was barely even half full.

Jean swallowed a lump in his throat as he shifted his vision to Sasha. Her eyes only remained downcast as she just plain stared at what little food she helped herself to.

He felt his throat dry at the mere sight of it.

Jean swallowed again. "Not hungry?" he started, hoping his tone feigned enough casualness in it as he asked.

Sasha slowly turned to him with a small shake of her head and a plastered smile. "Sort of. I kinda ate a lot in between sessions." she said before helping herself to a spoonful from her barely filled plate.

And in his great moment of stupidity, Jean only nodded. "Oh. Okay." he said, turning back to his own meal.

As he did so, though, only one word seemed to reverberate throughout his conscience like a fucked up refrain, practically haunting him as he continued on with his dinner.

Liar.

He didn't dare look back at her for the rest of the meal.

.

.

.

Not once.

.

.

.

Liar was soon replaced with another word as the night went on.

.

.

.

Coward.

.

.

.

Jean wasn't quite sure if he was still referring to Sasha that time.


Later that night, Jean found himself awkwardly seated on the sofa with Connie during free period as they waited for everyone to head back into their own rooms and turn in for the night.

That and waited for Mikasa to finally pull herself away from Eren and Armin as they chatted on.

"Not sleeping yet?" Petra asked as passed them by on the way to the stairs. "You know you've got work tomorrow."

Slowly, the two shook their heads with Connie speaking up in place for the both of them. "Yeah, in a bit. Just waiting for the dinner to settle down my stomach."

Jean nodded. "Same here."

The barista seemed to buy as much. "Alright then. Don't take too long then, wouldn't want you going to work tomorrow all exhausted in the morning." she said as she continued her pace to the girl's quarters.

"Sure thing, Mom." Connie and Jean said unconsciously in unison, eyes widening as they realized what they just said.

Oddly enough, instead of being insulted, Petra seemed to be flattered by the familial title and only laughed. "Goodnight, boys."

"Goodnight!" they responded in unison.

As soon as she disappeared up the stairs and into the second floor corridor, Jean turned to Connie with a quirked brow.

"Mom, huh?"

The buzz-cut shrugged and raised his hands in an oh well gesture. "Not the first time I did that. And last time I checked, I'm not the only one who does it as well."

"Touché."

A handful of minutes passed before the entire common room turned empty, and around the same time Mikasa finally arrived.

"Sorry I took so long." she muttered as she sat down on the couch across from where Jean and Connie sat.

The equestrian instructor only waved her off again in understanding.

"No problem. It's about damn time anyways." Jean said as he waited for Mikasa to completely settle down on her seat.

"So," Connie started. "Pretty sure we already know why we're gathered here. Why now though?" he asked, turning to Jean.

"Like I said yesterday, it would've been better if we had Mikasa around when we talk about..." Jean hesitated to find the right word. "...this."

"I take it you wanted to fill me in then?"

"Not exactly." the instructor said, shaking his head. He breathed out a sigh. "You two suggested that we give her space. I was thinking maybe...well..." Jean trailed off, not even sure what he was trying to propose.

"You wanna try approaching her now then?" Connie asked.

"Something like that." Jean said, nodding. "I mean not literally approach her but more like not give her space? Let her know we're here for her and all that stuff. Last time I checked, giving her space isn't really working as well as any of us would've hoped."

Three pairs of shoulders slumped in defeat at the statement.

"An intervention then?" Mikasa suggested after a short lapse of silence. Jean nodded again, but this time in her direction.

"Doesn't seem too bad of an idea to be honest."

The buzz-cut lifted a hand. "I'm gonna have to stop you right there, hombre." he dropped his hand back onto his thigh. "I get that you want to 'not give her space' and all that," he said, air-quoting. "But we can't just go all up in her face like that. Baby steps, ya know?"

"Baby steps?" Jean repeated.

"Yes, baby steps." Connie said, almost a little impatient. "Based on the way she's been acting lately, something like that might as well make her feel even worse."

"Maybe at a later time then?" the nurse asked. "When she's feeling a little better at least." she paused for a moment to lean her back against the couch. "At some point she's gonna have to talk to us about it. Any of us."

Both instructors nodded. Jean turned to the buzz-cut.

"Say, Con?"

"Hm?"

"Was she like this when she found out they were getting married?"

Connie nodded. "Kind of. She practically cried herself to sleep every night for a week, I think. She didn't take it very well." suddenly his mouth pulled into a sad smile. "Sasha has this habit of using up entire tissue boxes when it comes to him. She's weird that way."

"Weird. Right." Jean muttered.

"She's getting worse by the day." Connie said quietly. He suddenly groaned and leaned back against the couch as well. "She hasn't even given his jacket back to him, honestly."

Jean raised a brow when he noticed Mikasa nodding from the corner of his eye.

"Wait, what jacket?" he asked, swapping glances between both his coworkers.

Connie straightened up in place. "That gray jacket she wears around the dorm sometimes? You know, the one with the Utgard University logo in the back?"

The equestrian instructor nodded, recalling seeing her in that same jacket just last week and maybe even a few more times before then.

And then his eyes widened in realization

"Wait, don't tell me..."

"Yeah, it used to be Berthold's. Gave it to her at a house party the day before graduation. Apparently she's been holding on to it ever since. Didn't even bother giving it back even after Bert came back from that cross country trip with Reiner couple years back."

The other boy stared at him incredulously. "Didn't you graduate like a half a decade ago?"

"My point exactly."

Jean his jaw drop ever so slightly. Then suddenly he followed Connie's last action and slumped back on the couch with a groan.

"What is she even doing?" he asked, once again turning to both of his friends. "She's aware of what she's doing to herself, right?'"

Connie shrugged. "Maybe she is, maybe she isn't." he said before breathing out a sigh. "If one thing's for sure, you can never really understand a person when they're in love."

Jean swore he flinched at the word. Sadly for him, the Taekwondo instructor still went on.

"Love's just fucked up that way, I guess. Sometimes you just get so deep into it half the time you just forget yourself. Even if it hurts like hell you just keep pathetically holding onto it thinking it can bring you happiness even if you don't - even if you know you don't- have the slightest chance."

Love, huh? Jean thought to himself. He stifled a bitter chuckle. Seems more like torture.

He spared a glance to Mikasa who only nodded slowly agreement.

Jean had to fight back another chuckle. Of course Mik would get the feeling. He watched the way she reached a hand up to clutch the fabric of the scarf on her neck and bury her jaw under its folds, a habit Jean knew she's been doing for as long as he had known her and Eren.

Now that he thought about, even if he didn't have that stupid crush on her, he still would've noticed that little habit of hers.

And in a flash, Jean's memories did a replay of his high school life, most specifically to that pathetic period of his life where he pined after a girl with whom he didn't even stand a chance.

.

.

.

"I just wanted to say you have beautiful hair."

"Oh. Thank you."

.

.

.

"I was thinking maybe you might want to go to prom with me?"

"I'm sorry but I'm already going with someone."

.

.

.

"Would you like to go out with me some time?"

"Jean, I…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…I'm sorry."

"S'alright. I totally get it. Good luck with Eren, though."

.

.

.

The instructor had to stifle chuckling a third time.

Guess I get the feeling too, huh?

He remembered that his mother has an exact term for that time in his life, but before Jean was able to retrieve it from the depths of his memories Connie suddenly spoke up.

"So is that all you needed to talk about? Slowly approach her?"

Jean nodded. "Yeah. Sorry for keeping you up too long." he said as the three of them began standing up. "Also, think maybe we can meet up like this again?"

"Sure. When?" Connie asked as he stretched a kink in his back.

"Thursday night?" Mikasa suggested. "The common room is usually pretty full on Friday and the weekends."

The two before her nodded. "Seems good." Jean said. "So Thursday night, as soon as everyone's in their rooms?"

Connie and Mikasa nodded.

The latter made the move to lay a hand on Jean's shoulder, offering him a small smile.

"It was great of you to set this up, Jean. Have a goodnight." she said. She looked over to Connie. "You as well."

The buzz-cut smiled in return. "Yeah you have a good night too."

In an ever gentlemanly fashion, the two instructors waited for Mikasa to ascend up the stairs and disappear into the corridor before heading back to their own rooms.

"She's right, you know." Connie said as they walked towards the men's quarters.

"Really?" Jean asked, turning to him.

"Yeah, really. Like I said, I was gonna do it myself before you beat me to it." he stopped in front of his door, and the other boy followed suit. "Really though, thanks man. I told you that you were more than qualified to help us out with this." Connie said as he planted a hand on his doorknob. "Best you get some sleep, kay?"

"Yeah sure."

"Goodnight."

"Night."

And with that, the shorter man entered his room and closed the door behind him with a soft click.

Jean let out a long, drawn out sigh as he headed towards his own room.

At some point you're gonna figure out you're dead wrong, Connie, he thought as he slowly opened the door.

There was no denying that he was worried as hell but no way was that enough.

He noticed every little change in Sasha as the days stretched on but he knew that wouldn't be enough either.

And even if he did had the initiative to set up that meeting, Jean knew for a fact that it still wasn't enough.

It still didn't erase the fact that from the minute Berthold joined the staff until that night, he had only been one thing.

A lowly, stupid coward.


It was understandable that guys did crazy things when they were in love.

Even more so when the guy actually got the girl.

And if that guy were a certain borderline-psychopath doctor, you can just bet for the worst.

But really, Eren?

Literally the day after you get a girlfriend you stick everyone's stuff to the ceiling before breakfast?

What was this, junior year?

Even a child could think of a better prank.

From this given info, one could guess that when a certain Eren Jaeger was ecstatic and in love, he'd mostly tone down his antics to mildly insane.

Though the level of sanity was still up to debate, even up to now.

Maybe that was why he always pulled pranks on everyone?

Because guys do crazy things when they were in love and Eren had actually loved Mikasa back the entire time? Something like that?

.

.

.

No one will ever know.

Oh well.

Jean only grumbled as he got his sketchpad off the ceiling. The instructor inspected it for a moment, glad that Eren had only used adhesive spray, before stepping off the ladder the boys had brought in to let the person next in line grab their stuff from the ceiling.

"Where's Sasha?" he asked as he stood beside Connie while waiting for breakfast to be done.

The shorter man ran a hand over his scalp before nodding in the direction of the stairs.

She wasn't falling in line, maybe to just get her stuff later after everyone got theirs and instead opted to idly wander around the common room as she waited for breakfast as well.

And by her luck she just had to bump into Berthold as she neared the door.

"Oh. Sorry, Sash."

"It's alright. No biggie."

Jean would be lying if he said he didn't try to eavesdrop on them.

"Did you get your stuff already?" Berthold asked.

She only shook her head. "I'll just wait for everyone else to get theirs. I'll probably just get it later on my break or something." She paused, probably to gesture to something. "What about you?"

"I'm also kinda falling in line to use the step ladder."

"Seriously? I'm pretty sure you can just get your stuff without it."

Berthold suddenly chuckled and placed a hand on top of her head.

Sasha let out a laugh as well but it sounded more dry than anything else.

Jean unconsciously gritted his teeth.

"Ever the funny one, Sasha."

Jean really felt like kicking that smile off his face.

A moment passed before Berthold's turn for the ladder came up, and soon enough Sasha was left back to her idle wandering.

Jean kept his eyes on her for a moment longer before suddenly feeling a hand on his shoulder.

"No need for you to look so jealous, Jean."

"Huh-what?" he stammered as he turned around.

Mina only took her hand off him and shrugged with a smile. "We get that you like her but there's no need to get so possessive. Especially since Berthold is a married man, after all."

"Jealous?" he asked, giving her a look. "I'm not jealous."

Mina waved him off. "You keep telling yourself that, whatever floats your boat." She said cheekily as she walked away.

Jean was about to respond, not actually quite finding the words soon enough.

He was definitely not jealous. He was worried.

Yeah, totally.

Worried.

Good luck trying to convince Mina that.

With a sigh, he turned back to Sasha.

She hadn't really moved at all, and instead idly watched everyone without actually looking at anything in particular.

Jean frowned.

Should I talk to her or something…? Maybe it's too early for that?

The thoughts were cut off when Connie suddenly appeared by her side.

Okay, at least he's there.

Jean let out a sigh, feeling he burden from all his thoughts lift back up ever so slightly.

But now that his current train of thought had been alleviated, it was soon replaced by the earlier one.

No need to look so jealous, Jean.

He wasn't jealous.

.

.

.

Absolutely not.

.

.

.

No way in hell.

.

.

.

Right?


"Mornin' Sash." Connie started as he neared the brunette, raising a fist.

Sasha turned to him with a small smile. "Hey Con," she replied as she bumped her fist into his. "What did Eren stick up? Your bindings?" she pointed to the bundles of fabric precariously hanging from the ceiling above.

The buzz-cut shook his head. "Not even close. Bastard got my leg weights." He pointed to the packets of fabric on the other side of the room. "How he managed to get that out of my locker, I'll never know. I should probably change the combo soon."

Sasha looked up to where he pointed. "Oh." She muttered before meeting his gaze. "So whose bindings are those?"

Connie swallowed a lump in his throat.

"Reiner's." he lied, knowing full well that Reiner's were still stained with blood from yesterday as compared to the clean ones up above.

The girl seemed to buy as much. "Ah." She said, nodding. Suddenly her lips pursed. "So what happened yesterday? I never really got to hear all the details about that Fight Club."

Connie shook his head, not wanting to relive that chaos Eren dared to call a 'friendly spar'.

"Uh-uh, that's purely confidential."

He didn't miss the way she smirked. "I'm guessing you got your ass whooped?" she snorted, gesturing to the bandages on his arms.

"Yeah whatever." He said, reaching forward to rustle her bangs. "The only one who got their ass whooped was Eren. Reiner was a fucking beast."

And then she laughed.

An actual laugh.

"I expect no less from Utgard's Orangutan."

Connie couldn't fight back a grin as he took his hand off her, using the same hand to gesture to the dining hall. "Breakfast?"

Sasha nodded. "Yeah, sure."

And together they headed for the table, the smell of pancakes immediately welcoming them as they neared it.

For once she actually seemed like her normal self. She laughed and talked with the others at the table, goofing off like she usually did.

Sure, she helped herself to only two as opposed to the usual stack but it was still an improvement.

Connie chalked it up to the fact that Berthold was still rather preoccupied and not at the table with them.

And that was good enough.

He waited until they had separated to go to their respective training grounds before pumping his fist in the air in triumph.

First victory.

It may not have been much, but it was still something, right?

If I could just help her get some more food in her stomach…

Connie suddenly stopped in his pace to slap a palm to his face.

Of course! He thought as he continued walking. Why the hell didn't I think of that before?

Connie waved at a few of his coworkers in the main building as he passed them by, and made a mental note to drop by the file room for the schedules later and for one of the vending machines during free period tomorrow.

There was no harm in trying his luck, right?


Krista yawned, stretching the small kinks in her back as the ending credits of some romance movie started to roll on Armin's laptop screen. They were in the file room again, and while Mother was in the middle of a very important meeting over Skype in their shared room, the younger girl discreetly asked if she could spend her time outside of the room rather than awkwardly sit there and wait for it to end.

She thanked her lucky stars that she actually agreed.

And even better, Armin had some free time as well while Hanji was out doing the rounds for him.

So of course like any other couple, they spent their time together in the form of watching some over-the-DVD-store-shelf romance movie.

The said boy scooted over to close the application before turning to Krista.

"So, waddya think?"

The girl only shrugged and shook her head. "It wasn't bad but…it really could've been better. They just feel really…forced." she shifted to get to a more comfortable position on her chair. "Really rushed too? And the way the met is just way too cliché."

Armin turned to her with a raised brow. "Really now?"

She nodded. "Yeah. By accident at a coffee shop and then they miraculously meet again? Especially somewhere so unlikely and obscure?"

"Doesn't that seem even a little familiar?"

Brows furrowed on her end for a moment, not quite knowing what he meant. Maybe he was talking about some other movie she might've seen before? Armin replied to her quizzical look by gesturing to himself then to her with a hand and a knowing grin.

Her brows remained furrowed at the action.

Huh?

.

.

.

Oh.

.

.

.

OH.

Krista felt the heat as it rose up her face as soon as she understood his point. She bit her lip as she averted her gaze. "Okay. Maybe a little." she muttered, pressing her hands to her face to hide her embarrassment.

Her gaze only snapped back to him when he chuckled.

Really?

He's practically reduced her into a tomato with blonde hair and yet he still had the audacity to laugh?

"It's not funny." she said as she pouted and dropped her hands.

"I know, I know." Armin reached over to lightly pinch her nose, a gesture Krista realized to be something he did when trying to be affectionate. "But you're cute when you're flustered." he released her nose with another chuckle. "Whichever the case, I guess you can say a romance movie is only as good as the trope it follows."

Krista tilted her head to the side in curiosity. "Trope?"

"You know, the romantic context?"

When she furrowed her brows at the statement, Armin gave her a mock gasp. "As my fellow YA reader I thought you would know as much."

Krista shrugged. "Mind telling me about it so I understand what you mean?"

"Alright then," Armin made a move to straighten up on his seat. "First we have what I like to call the 'Slow Burning'." he said as he gestured with his hand, first with his pointer finger and then air-quoting for emphasis. "In this trope the two don't usually get along at first but things happen and then they realize just how important they are to each other. Think Ron and Hermione or Percy and Annabeth."

"So it's the generic vitriolic best buds turned romance?"

He nodded. "Yeah, pretty much." he said, pointing for emphasis as he did.

Krista only smiled, proud with herself for her relevant contribution. "Go on?"

"Okay so the second one is what I call The Tragic." Armin said, holding up two fingers, and in that moment Krista realized that he was pretty fond of talking with his hands. "As the name implies, it's the saddest. Unrequited love, unlawful love, the other person is already taken or even dead, all that miserable stuff." he dropped his hand back to the table. "What makes it even sadder is how the character in question would still go on with it, no matter how much it hurts."

"Like Snape and Lily?" Krista half-butted in, half-asked.

"Yes, exactly." he said with a smile, and something about the way his eyes lit up as he agreed made Krista's heart do a funny thing in her chest. Luckily enough Armin didn't give her much time to notice it as he went on.

"So the last one is the most common of all. It goes by many names but I prefer to call it The Instant. Love at first sight, the instant romantic click. Serendipity, if you will."

"So literally every trashy chick-lit rom-com ever?" Krista piped in once more.

Armin pursed his lips, then shook his head as he smiled. "I was thinking more like you and me but that could work too."

And there goes the blush again.

"Shut up," Krista managed to mumble as she fought back the rush of heat to her face once more.

"Make me." he countered as he grinned.

He was challenging her. That jerk.

"You know it's true." he added, the grin not dropping from his face.

"Since when did you get so cheeky?" she shot back, heat temporarily stopping in its tracks to her cheeks.

Armin furrowed his brows and tapped a finger to his chin as if in thought. "Well," he started, gazing right at her. "Having a goddess by my side is a pretty good confidence booster."

And the blush returns in full force. "You sneaky jerk." she said, swatting his chest with the back of her hand.

Just as she started to draw it back, Armin gently grasped her wrist and grinned.

"You love me either way."

Krista felt herself freeze at the word.

Love?

She shook her head free of the thought, and instead of answering to his retort verbally she used her other hand to pinch his nose.

Hard.

"Ow!" he yelped, immediately reaching up with his other hand to pull hers away from his poor nose.

Krista grinned, and for a second she felt a little bad at the action but the feeling was soon gone when he whined.

"What was that for?"

"For being cheeky."

"Really now?"

"You deserved it."

His hands were still around her wrists, not the least bit forceful but nonetheless still firm in their grip saying, stay right here, don't go anywhere else.

Usually the contact would make Krista want to awkwardly pry herself away but there was just something about well, hands.

Especially his.

They were always just everywhere.

Armin would always gesture with them when he spoke like he were telling tales of a past life when he was literally just talking about something as mundane as the weather or something. Sometimes he'd play with the ends of her hair, and no, not run his fingers through the entire length of her hair or anything, literally just the ends and nothing else. Even when his hands were just set on his lap or a tabletop they'd still be in constant motion, fingers absently drawing patterns or just impatiently tapping on whatever surface they were on.

For someone so patient and sweet, his hands were pretty hyperactive.

But that didn't mean Krista didn't enjoy the feeling of them in her own.

In fact, quite the opposite.

She pried her wrists free from his grip so she could entwine her fingers with his.

The look on Armin's face as she did practically made her heart spill right out of her rib cage. Smiling, she pulled apart her hands to put them on either sides of his face.

Krista leaned in, slowly, carefully.

.

.

.

There was no denying Armin's eagerness as he leaned in as well.

.

.

.

Merely centimeters left between them.

.

.

.

They were practically breathing the same breath.

.

.

.

And just as Armin moved in a little more to finally meet his lips with hers…

.

.

.

Krista pulled at his cheeks with as much force she could muster.

The yelp that Armin let out was more than enough to make her double over in laughter. He only scowled, but soon chuckled along with her.

His eyes met hers, and in that moment her heart went over a thousand miles per second by her roughest estimation.

.

.

.

You love me either way, his voice seemed to echo in her mind.

.

.

.

Krista shook her head of the thought once more and flashed him a smile.

She'll have to find a better reply for that later.


Mikasa threw her head back with a small sigh as she ran her fingers through her hair, enjoying the hot shower spray as it touched her skin with a quiet hum. The nurse lathered on some soap and absently listened in to the noise the morning had to offer.

Birds chirping. Footsteps on the hardwood floor as her other coworkers got ready before breakfast. Soft greetings of good morning and other small talk as everyone passed by each other while they went about with their morning routines.

From small window above the shower head, she noticed the sun was still trudging its way upwards toward the horizon, dying the little view of sky Mikasa had a soft shade of gold.

Should be a quarter to seven by now, she thought as she rinsed the last of the soap off her body. She glanced to her left, knowing her roommate should be finished showering as well despite that fact she was facing nothing but a tiled wall.

Ever since she could remember, the two of them have made a routine of heading to the showers together, and if one were to finish earlier they would head over to their room and wait for the other to return before locking the door and changing.

At least the little tradition they made for themselves didn't change even with... the chain of events that had happened ever since the past week.

As soon as she knew her body and hair were devoid of all soap, the nurse turned off the shower and dried herself before stepping out of the stall, one hand securely holding the towel that wrapped her frame while the other held the plastic bucket that carried her toiletries.

Mikasa paused to properly secure the towel over her chest before standing in front of Sasha's stall and gently rapping on the door.

There was no response.

Mikasa knocked again. "Sasha?" she called.

Still no response.

Expecting the worst, the nurse tried a third time at a much louder volume.

"Sasha!"

Finally there was a response.

"Yeah?"

Mikasa pursed her lips, finding Sasha's voice too soft, even with the shower spray that usually muffled it.

"I finished. Make sure you finish soon, okay?"

"Yeah, sure."

The nurse pursed her lips again before heading out of the communal ladies' bathroom, acknowledging her coworkers with a nod as she passed them by. She paused as she reached her room, making the move to drop her basket beside her trunk and sit on her bed as soon as the door closed behind her.

Mikasa rubbed the towel over her hair, letting the now clean raven locks fall in a tangled mess against the sides of her jaw. She let the towel hang over the wooden foot of her bed to dry before running her fingers though her hair to untangle it.

She was just about done when the door suddenly opened, revealing a towel-clad Sasha.

"Hey." she greeted softly as she closed the door behind her. Mikasa waited for the lock to click before she stood up and headed for her drawer, grabbing a set of underwear as soon as she opened it.

"What's the day today?" Sasha asked as she followed suit.

"Tuesday." the nurse answered as she reached behind to clasp her bra. From the corner of her eye she caught Sasha nodding as she pulled out a white uniform polo shirt from her closet as opposed to Monday's light brown.

Oh right, Mikasa thought, instantly remembering the fact that some instructors needed to follow a daily color scheme to keep their outfits uniformed. She soon brushed the thought away as she fit her nurse's dress over her head.

They were usually silent in times like this, nothing else but rustling fabric and closing zippers filling up the silence.

"Hey Mikasa?"

So when Sasha suddenly spoke, Mikasa had to put in effort into not furrowing her brows as she faced her roommate.

"Hm?"

"Do you have a belt I can borrow?" Sasha asked over her shoulder. From what Mikasa saw, she was mostly dressed save for her upper body which was only covered by a sports bra.

But even in Sasha's discreet attempt at hiding her body as from her as if they haven't been changing in front of each other for the past two years, Mikasa still saw it.

She was a nurse, for crying out loud.

Of course she would notice the way Sasha's ribs were lightly jutting against her skin when she distinctly remembered that they never did and the fact that they shouldn't even be doing that to begin with.

Mikasa only stopped in clasping her dress from the back to reach into one of her drawers and pull out a strip of brown leather by its buckle. It was old and rarely used considering that she usually wore scrubs most of the time, but she always found the need to be prepared anyways.

She made the move to walk over to Sasha and give to her directly so she could see for herself.

"Here," she murmured, taking the second Sasha took to face her and grab the belt to give her roommate a full body once over.

The polo shirt she donned did a lot to cover up her entire upper body, no wonder why she wasn't able to notice it sooner. It was when she shifted her gaze downwards that Mikasa had to fight back a purse of her lips.

She didn't recall Sasha's hips being nothing short of a perfect fit with the jeans she wore every day.

Mikasa immediately flashed her gaze back upwards.

"Does it fit alright?"

Sasha nodded as she secured the belt through the loops in her jeans before buckling.

"Yeah. Thanks, Mikasa."

The raven nodded back slowly, if not dumbly before heading back to her bed to grab her scarf off her nightstand and securing it on her neck. She reached for her phone to check the time.

7:08

Mikasa looked back up at her roommate who was in front of the mirror as she tied her hair up in its usual ponytail.

"We should head down now. Breakfast already started." Mikasa said, pocketing her phone. Sasha met her glance through the mirror and nodded.

"Okay." She said as she turned to face her. "Is something the matter?" she asked.

Mikasa only shook her head. "Nothing, just a little hungry. Aren't you?"

She didn't miss the way Sasha hesitated. "Yeah, a little."

The nurse said no more as she stepped forward to unlock the door.

Sasha...

She waited for her roommate to exit the room before leaving and closing the door behind her.

The least I can do now is make sure she eats at least half of what she used to.

Sasha had helped herself to a slice of French toast later that morning.

And that was all she had.

"You sure you don't want anymore?" Mikasa had asked, lifting the plate toward her in an offer.

Sasha only shook her head. "Not really, no. Sorry, Mik."

The nurse only set the plate down with a nod.

Later in the infirmary, Mikasa couldn't help but sigh in defeat at the memory.

I really suck at this.

.

.

.

"Something wrong?" Annie asked from her place in the infirmary bed, somehow sensing her distress.

Mikasa looked up and only shook her head.

"Nothing really."

Now wasn't that a goddamned lie?


Connie dismissed his last clients of the morning with a bit of a rush.

He waited for the pair of young men to disappear into the locker room before turning to Reiner who was also seeing off his last client.

"I've got free period so I'll be seeing ya." He said with a wave, and from the corner of his eye he noticed his fellow instructors absently giving him a wave as they headed for the benches.

Connie headed straight for the employee locker room, grabbing a towel and his wallet from his locker before making his way to the archery field.

It was a quirk in their friendship that they had full knowledge of the others' work schedule in case they'd have extra free time on their hands. One way or another they'd just know.

Today was no exception. Connie paused in his pace in front of the main lobby's vending machine, taking a minute to put in a couple of quarters and grab two granola bars before continuing his way to the back exit.

He sighed. Granola bars weren't exactly the healthiest thing in the world.

I guess they'll have to do for the time being, he thought as he neared the archery fields. Sasha never really cared much about health anyways. Food was just food, regardless of nutrients.

Sasha was also in the middle of dismissing her own student as well, a short girl (well, definitely shorter than him, that was for sure) with blonde hair and blue eyes. Connie watched as the two conversed as they removed their arm guards and set in on a plastic table.

He fought back a smile.

Sasha had always been notorious for being an approachable to her students. With the way she smiled and even patted the girl on her shoulder almost in reassurance, it was no wonder why she had so many clients.

Connie waited for the student to leave before finally stepping forward. He soon found himself quirking a brow upwards.

As soon as the blonde girl was out of sight (most likely on her way to the equestrian field, Connie deduced), Sasha started to circle the tree behind her, almost she was looking for something.

"Yo Sash!" he called, hoping to catch her attention. Sasha stopped in her tracks instantaneously.

"Oh. Hey, Con." she gave him a short wave, then dropped her hand to her side just as fast. "What brings you here?"

Connie stepped towards her. "Free period. Figured you might wanna hang like usual?"

She nodded. "Sure."

"So," he started. "What were you doing anyways?" he asked. "Did you drop something?"

Sasha shook her head. "No," she gestured awkwardly to the tree beside her. "Just looking for a cool spot under here, I guess. Wanted to sneak in a nap before lunch."

"Ah." Connie said, nodding. He dug into his pockets to retrieve one of the granola bars.

"Thought you'd want something to eat? Lunch shouldn't be for another hour."

"Yeah, sure." she said with a smile.

The buzz-cut wasn't convinced by it by the slightest.

Nonetheless he maintained his own smile as he tossed the bar over to her.

Where a normal person would've been hit in the eye by a snack bar, Sasha caught it with relative ease single handed.

At least her reflexes are still on point, Connie thought as she watched her tear open the wrapper and take a bite. Sasha turned around to sit at the base of the tree before taking another and he soon followed suit.

"So," he started, turning to her. "Who was she?" he asked, obviously referring to the blonde he had seen with her just a few moments ago.

Sasha swallowed before turning to him. "Krista. Krista Lenz. She's been under me for almost a month now, I think?"

Connie nodded. "Ah. You seem to be pretty well acquainted."

She shook her head slowly. "Not really."

"I don't see you being all buddy-buddy with Flegel Reeves."

"Well yeah but..." she trailed off with a shrug then took a bite of her food so she wouldn't have to speak anymore, and making an obvious display of avoiding eye contact.

Connie narrowed his eyes. "But what?" he poked her in the side. "What are you not telling me, Sasha?" he asked, poking her in the same spot repeatedly. He didn't stop until she suddenly let out a sigh after swallowing.

"Krista she's...uhhh..." she was obviously hesitating.

Connie poked her again. "Hoy chica."

"She's Jean's fiancée." She blurted out.

He felt his eyes widen.

"Holy shit."

Sasha let out a chuckle. "My reaction exactly."

"Dude, does she know that it was you?"

"She recognized me from the wedding, apparently. Even thanked me for it."

Connie chuckled. "Jesus Christ. Their engagement is just gonna be legendary."

"I know right? They're so against it it's ridiculous."

He scooted over a little closer to her. "Does Jean know?"

"Yeah." she said with a nod. "We talked about it a week ago, I think? Anyways he said he was just gonna deal with it like a man or whatever."

"He seems like the type." Connie let out a sigh.

"You know that you can always talk to me, right?"

Sasha furrowed a brow at the statement. "Of course."

"I mean it, Sash. We've been best friends since what, third grade?"

"Second." she corrected.

"Yeah, second grade." he said, pointing to acknowledge the correction. He dropped his hand back to his lap. "That's almost two decades of us putting up with each other's crap." he continued, hoping she got the message. "So if you have anything you wanna talk about or if anything's troubling you right now you can always just go to me, yeah?"

Sasha didn't really react, only just stared at him warily as if he was entering uncharted territory.

Connie swallowed a lump in his throat before prodding on. "So? Anything that's, you know, troubling you right now?"

He tried to ask her as delicately as possible, not wanting to grab the bull by the horns and instead letting her move at her own pace.

The last thing she needed was to be comforted by force.

He waited until she responded.

And could've sworn he felt his chest deflate when Sasha shook her head.

"Nothing in particular, really." she muttered.

Connie did his best to feign a smile and nodded in understanding. "Okay then."

Despite the topic changing to something a lot more trivial a few moments later, there was still this tension veiling over them so suffocating Connie almost thought he overstepped a boundary or two, even with his role as her best friend.

They didn't do much until time out, save for the usual shenanigans of talking about movies they wanted to watch and the upcoming annual Bonfire Night, along with the embarrassing moments that happened to their coworkers on that same night.

Somehow they ended up talking about Eren and Mikasa getting together.

"It really was about damn time." Connie said as he leaned back on the bark behind him.

"True that." Sasha said with a nod. "But to be honest they pretty much acted like a couple anyways."

Suddenly forgetting his earlier overstepping, Connie smirked, "What, like you and Jean?"

She threw him a look. "Really, Con?"

He only shrugged. "Not my fault you two look cute together."

The girl groaned and slapped his shoulder. "Ugh."

Connie raised his hands in defense. "You make it sound like it's a bad thing. Jean's a pretty decent guy."

"Well yeah but..." she trailed off again with another shrug. "I barely even know the guy."

"I don't see how that's a drawback."

"Connie..." Sasha let out a sigh, shoulders dropping under the weight of her breath. "You already know why." she added quietly.

"Sasha..."

They both turn at the sound of footsteps moving toward them.

"Oh. Hey Mina."

"Hey Mina."

The girl gave them a wave. "Thought you'd want a head's up. Petra already got started on lunch."

"Oh okay." Connie said, suddenly getting up. He turned around to face Sasha and offered his hand. She gladly took it and Connie hoisted her up with ease. "Thanks." she muttered as she got to her feet. Sasha turned back to Mina with a smile. "Thanks by the way."

Mina only smiled back. "Sure thing. If you'll excuse me I'll be heading off to Jean." Something about that gleam in her eye spelled mischief. "Wanna come with?" she asked innocently.

Sasha wrinkled her nose. "I know what you're trying to do and my answer is no."

The raven only pouted. "Fine. I'll be off now then." she said as she walked away.

Connie pressed a fist to his mouth, a halfhearted attempt to muffle a chuckle.

Sasha saw right through it and smacked him in the ribs with the back of her hand.

"Ow!"

"Don't act innocent!" she said, throwing a glower.

For the first time in a while she actually seemed like her normal self.

Connie only grinned and raised a hand to ruffle the bangs on her forehead. "I'm not denying anything." she dropped the glower in favor of a pout at the contact. He took his hand off her, grin still prominent on his face. "Lunch?"

She nodded. "Let's go."

A few moments later Connie pumped his fist in the air, proud of his second victory.

"What got into you?" Sasha asked as they neared the dorm entrance.

He merely shook his head. "Nothing."

Sasha rolled his eyes at him. "I need to use the restroom." she said, pointing to the second floor's balcony before trudging up the stairs.

Connie watched as she went up, already accustomed to the wooden squeaking that accompanied her footfalls.

And then he paused at the sight of her hands.

In her left one she was still holding half of the granola bar, the extra wrapper folded over it to preserve its freshness.

She only ate half of it?

Connie shook his head.

No no no she's gonna finish it. I trust her enough to take care of herself as much.

The buzz-cut palmed his shaven scalp with a sigh before heading to his own room.

If their friendship was built on anything, it was trust.

And he wouldn't be her best friend to begin with if he didn't even trust her with herself.

.

.

.

Later that day, Mikasa told him she found a half-eaten granola bar in the trash bin in her shared room with Sasha.

.

.

.

Connie fought back a loud, disappointed groan.

.

.

.

Victory my ass.


Monday always meant two things.

First was that the whole day would most probably be impossible to go through without at least a metric fuck-ton of caffeine.

Second was that Tuesday afternoon would be the dull lull before midweek madness, leaving most of the instructing staff already done with sessions before five as opposed to Monday's usual six.

So there Jean was, the afternoon sun taking an awful lot of time to set behind him despite it still being in the middle of April as he headed back to the dorm, back still a little sore from the last session and palms still a little sweaty from grasping on to the reins a little too tightly.

As soon as he entered the lodging and gave his fellow instructors a wave of acknowledgment, Jean headed straight into room and shed off all his riding gear in favor for jeans and a shirt. The instructor stretched his back for a moment, letting his spine pop back into place now that the back brace was off.

Satisfied, Jean dug into his drawer to retrieve his sketchpad and a pencil before heading out to the common room to wait for dinner with the others. If he had to be brutally honest, he really didn't have anything in mind to sketch at the time but he had to bring it with him anyways.

No way in hell was he going to leave his precious sketch pad alone after that little prank Eren pulled yesterday morning.

After finding a comfortable spot on the couch, the instructor opened up his portfolio to a blank page and took his pencil against it, letting his hand have a mind of its own and making up his art concept as he went along.

It was usually in moments like these that his mind was totally blank, compared to the hours he spent thinking about a certain...someone while he was at work.

Honestly. The pressure Connie and Mikasa put on him was more than enough to make anyone unfocused.

What were they even thinking?

Hey, so I saw that Sasha objected to your forced wedding by accident, do you mind helping her get over the guy she had been pining for the last decade since he's working here and all? Thanks that'd be great. No, we're not letting you out of this, it has to be you.

What the actual fuck, guys.

But oddly enough, Jean could never bring it in himself to actually face them and back out. Hell, had it been about anything else he would've done that before they even asked.

He was never good with feelings. His high school track record of romance was more than enough proof of how shitty of a guy he actually was. This wasn't something he could just deal with like a commission or a drill. It was something much too fragile and messy to just deal with. Feelings were much too fragile and messy to deal with.

Which was exactly why he was never good with them in the first place.

He was brash. Impatient. An all-around asshole.

Three things that made him perfectly unfit for this issue he was suddenly asked to help solve.

So why, even with all his reasons, couldn't he just politely step back from it?

Why couldn't he just keep his nose out of this business that most definitely wasn't his to begin with?

Why was he so affected by the little things and still so subconsciously willing to help Sasha out even if he barely even knew her?

Jean suddenly stopped sketching at the sound of creaking wood, looking up as he set the pencil down.

And there she was, the very girl who had been troubling his thoughts for the past two weeks.

Sasha kept her eyes to the floor as she descended down the stairs, obviously trying to hide her face behind a fringe of hair.

"Sasha!" a voice called. Jean turned to the source (Mina, he noticed) for a split second before turning back to Sasha.

She suddenly looked up, and Jean tore his gaze away just as fast.

He waited for a moment before looking back, listening in to the creak of the steps to make sure she reached the ground before craning his neck just the slightest bit.

And in the short moment his peripheral vision managed to get a good look at Sasha's face, the answer he had been looking for came to him just as soon as the question.

.

.

.

It came in the form of a replay of a thought he had not too long ago, back when he was in that café with her.

.

.

.

She looks better smiling.

.

.

.

Jean swallowed a lump in his throat.

Even if he had only seen it for a fraction of a second, he knew.

That was no smile.

Jean sighed, picking up the pencil once more to continue his sketch. Now that he got a better look at it, he figured it might be abstract scenery or something? He wasn't quite sure.

What he was sure of though, was that there was no getting out of this arrangement, even if he wanted to.

And now he knew for sure that he didn't.

Another thing was that he couldn't exactly just go up to Sasha right now, even after his epiphany because well...that would be rude. She was still talking to Mina, after all.

Jean wasn't quite sure what they were talking about though, considering he was much too engrossed in his work to listen to their conversation rather than just hear it.

The common room was starting to get a little more bustled after a short while as everyone finally returned to the dorm after they timed out. Jean heard a couple shuffling noises, halfheartedly greeted back the guys who gave him a Hey or a pat on the shoulder and continued with his work.

But amidst all the noise he had grown accustomed to since he started living at this dorm, he still overheard it.

"Where are you headed?" Sasha asked, just a few feet away from the entrance and where Jean sat.

"I'm off to visit Annie." Berthold answered, and from his peripheral vision Jean noticed that he was holding up what appeared to be a care package.

"Oh yeah, she's still in the infirmary, right?"

Berthold nodded. "Do you wanna come with?"

The offer practically made Jean flinch. The equestrian instructor decided to set down his pencil and pad on the coffee table and turn upwards to finally see the exchange for himself.

They stood at the entrance, with Sasha having to crane her neck to look at him properly and Berthold holding the door open, almost ready to leave.

Sasha only shook her head at a speed much too slow for Jean's taste with a smile so forced it practically made him flinch a second time.

"Alright then," Berthold said, lifting his hand in an all-too familiar gesture. "See you at dinner."

Jean grit his teeth together in preparation for the sight of Berthold patting the top of Sasha's head. He swapped his glance back at the girl who only watched him with an expression Jean could only describe to be...well, sad.

He gnashed his teeth together a little tighter.

.

.

.

It wouldn't kill you to look at her face whenever you do that.

.

.

.

Much to his surprise, the image he was dreading to see never came.

Instead Jean's eyes widened and his jaw eased up when Sasha met Berthold's hand in midair, almost swatting it away.

The girl dropped her hand as if she had been burned by the man's touch while he just gazed at her in mild confusion. Sasha promptly averted her eyes.

Jean could've sworn he flinched again at the sound of her sheepish (and not to mention very forced) chuckle.

"Oh, sorry, thought you were heading for a high-five."

Much to Jean's irritation, Berthold only chuckled as well. "Ah." he dropped his palm on Sasha's scalp anyways and rustled her hair before turning to leave.

"I'll see you later, then, kay?"

Sasha managed a nod and a reply much too small for Jean to even lip-read (much less hear) from where he sat, practically glaring at the MMA instructor's retreating form as he left.

Deciding not to further fuel the already steaming rage that filled his being, Jean turned back to Sasha.

And the flames turned to ice.

A wave of cold rushed over him as soon as his eyes landed on her, the way Sasha's eyes vacantly stared at where Berthold had been as if she had seen a ghost was more than enough to replace the rage with something more chilling. Something that reached deeper into the crevices of his consciousness and with a tighter grip that made his gut clench.

If anger and irritation did nothing but send a wildfire all throughout him, rough and violent yet disappearing just as fast as it spread, this (whatever it even was,) was something more dormant. Something that had always lived inside him, and once it erupted throughout his conscience it would never leave.

But before he was able to even identify what the feeling even was, Sasha suddenly looked down, bangs obstructing her eyes and headed for the door as well.

Is she crying...?

Jean swallowed a lump in his throat, and in a flash all the blood in his body went straight to his legs, accompanied by the sound of Connie's voice reverberating through his mind.

.

.

.

I know you hate seeing her like that so please. Please.

.

.

.

Jean knew he didn't need any more of a sign.

He had to go to her.

He had to at least talk to her.

Whether or not he agreed to the arrangement, he should at least do that.

Muttering a small okay to himself for affirmation, Jean took a few strides toward her.

Too slow.

As soon as he had been no less than a foot before her, Sasha had already turned for the door, leaving him in the dust.

Jean reached out a hand, almost as if trying to telepathically stop her.

The hand ended up dropping limply to his side as soon as the door shut behind her.

What the fuck, go after her, dumbass!

Choosing to ignore how his subconscious managed to play that train of thought in Connie's voice (and not to mention the peripheral sight of Mina and a few other girls shamelessly watching him like some soap opera), Jean continued his pace and opened the door and followed her outside.

The equestrian instructor immediately gave a once-over of his surroundings.

She wasn't anywhere in sight.

So Jean decided to up the ante by looking for her at the archery shack.

.

.

.

And then her entire training grounds.

.

.

.

And then his training grounds.

.

.

.

And then the rest of the Sina Country Club grounds.

.

.

.

She wasn't in any of those places.

Where the hell was she? Jean thought as he headed back to the dorm, the sun finally set into a fiery orange behind him as dinner time neared.

And as soon as he opened the door, the first thing he sees was Sasha's (forcibly) smiling face as she chatted with a few of her female coworkers in the common room.

The instructor grit his teeth, using all his willpower to not stomp right over to where she was and give her an earful of all the violence-infused thoughts that began running through his mind.

He breathed out a long and drawn out sigh before turning away angrily and heading back to his room.

Not now, he thought as he opened the door. Don't be too rash.

Jean leaned his weight on the door as it closed behind him, and then suddenly chuckling when he realized he had been in this exact position just a few days ago.

He slammed the back of his head on the wood and sighed.

This girl. Honestly.


It was official.

If it was a legal reason, Connie might as well put Worried to Death by Best Friend on his death certificate if Sasha kept up whatever the hell it was she was even doing.

The buzz-cut let out a long, drawn-out sigh as he opened the door to his bedroom, fully dressed and well awake a little earlier than usual as he stepped into the hall.

It also didn't help that he had a little trouble falling asleep the night before.

Honestly.

If he and the others, won't be able to do a thing about Sasha, there's no telling how far she'll actually go.

She might as well quit her job, for all they knew.

Connie shook his head free of the thought as he made his way to the kitchen. He took a deep breath, then suddenly opted to walk a little quicker.

Even if he was still in the hallway, there was no mistaking the scent of bacon, eggs and coffee wafting down from the kitchen in the morning.

Petra, you are the best mom ever, Connie thought as he entered the dining hall.

Much to his surprise, Sasha was also there as well, absently picking at some strips of bacon on her plate and holding a mug of coffee with her other hand.

She had her back to him, and it seemed like she didn't hear him walk in at all.

Connie frowned, knowing all too well that her senses were a hell of a lot better than that. If she had been at her best, she would've noticed him as soon as he closed his bedroom door behind him.

The buzz-cut shook off the frown with a shake of his head and made a move to approach her.

"Top of the morning, Sash." Connie started, putting a hand on her shoulder.

She turned to him, almost in shock from the contact. "Oh. Hey. Good morning."

Connie brushed off what he just noticed and opted to take his hand off her.

"You're up early."

Sasha nodded. "Yeah. I sort of just did. Guess my body clock got out of track or something."

Connie only nodded, choosing to ignore the dark circles under her eyes.

Yeah, right.

And suddenly an idea came to mind.

He cleared his throat.

"Since you got up early as well, wanna go the gym for a bit? Been ages since you tagged along with me for a work out."

The girl only gave him a smile and shook her head.

"I'm not really feeling very up to it, Con. Maybe some other time?"

Connie held back a sigh before running a hand over his scalp and smiling back.

"That's cool too. Let me know when you're up to it though, kay?" he said, reaching his hand over to rustle the bangs that laid on her forehead with his forefinger.

Sasha only nodded, not really bothering to make eye contact with him as she did. "Breakfast?" she asked, gesturing to the table before her.

Connie nodded back, taking his hand off his best friend while the other hand reached to pull out the chair beside her.

He spared only a fraction of a glance at the plate in front of her.

She was picking at a plate of bacon and eggs barely a third of the way full.

Connie immediately made a mental note to approach Jean and Mikasa during his break to plan for a much needed talk.

No way in hell was that an improvement.

"Something the matter, Con?"

The buzz-cut turned to Sasha, immediately forcing the corners of his mouth up as he shook his head.

"Nah. Just a little sleepy."

If she thinks she can lie and act her way through the day, then two could play at that game.

.

.

.

But if Connie were to be brutally honest…

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.

.

The winner was already pretty much a given.


"Say, Armin?"

Armin turned to Krista, the latter seeming a little deep in thought. It was late afternoon and while Mrs. Lenz decided to take a siesta until dinner, Krista decided to head down to the Main Lobby's café to kill some time.

Coincidentally, he was in the middle of covering for Petra while she had some wedding preparations to attend to.

Ah, the powers of coincidence.

"Hm?" was the only response Armin was able to muster as he continued making her drink, stealing a glance at her from the corner of his eye. Krista had opted to take one of the bar stool seats close to the coffeemaker, making it easy for them to talk as he worked.

"Well I was thinking about the romance tropes we talked about the other day and…" she trailed off, almost as if sounding embarrassed.

"Go on," he urged with a chuckle as he topped her drink with some whipped cream. "Just because I'm not looking doesn't mean I'm not listening."

He set down the can before appreciating his handiwork and then proceeded to carefully take the handle and place it in front of her.

"Here you go, one vanilla latte, extra cream."

Apparently she had a bone to pick with black coffee and would accept nothing in a mug even just a shade darker than creamy beige.

"Thank you." She muttered as she took the cup in her hands and brought it to her lips for a sip.

Armin couldn't resist grinning at her contented sigh as she set the cup down.

"I take it you like it?"

Krista only nodded.

"You ready to talk now?"

She nodded again. "Yeah." She straightened up in her seat before continuing. "I kinda had an epiphany last night: the tropes can be combined, right?"

"What do you mean?"

She took a long sip of her drink before answering.

"Well, think about it," she started, setting her mug down as she did. "Relationships are complex no matter what you do. They don't just follow one specific track." She paused to take another sip of her coffee. Armin only grinned at how she seemed to thoroughly enjoy her drink.

"Take Snape and Lily, for example. You say that it's the Tragic-"

"Actually you said it was the Tragic."

"-but it started out as the instant for Snape." She paused to throw him a look. Armin only raised his hands up momentarily in surrender.

"Okay, okay, sorry. Continue?"

And the look drops just as fast as she shot it at him. "So anyways, a good example of Slow Burning plus Tragic is Hazel and Augustus. You know, took them a while to get together, but then in the end Gus dies. Boom, Tragic."

"Spoiler much?"

Krista gave him another look. "You know what I mean." She reached for her mug again, only to frown upon seeing it empty.

Armin only chuckled. "I suppose you want a refill?"

She thrusted the mug toward him with a nod. "Yes, please."

He grinned back as he took it from her and turned back to the working station.

Guess the best way to a girl's heart is through her caffeine dependence.

"You can combine the three too, I think." She said, stretching out a knot in her back. Armin started the machine before turning to her.

"How so?"

Krista furrowed her bros for a moment in thought, and Armin took the time to get back on working on her drink.

"It starts off as Instant but neither of them are aware of it." She started slowly. "And then that's why it becomes the Slow Burning. But at the same time, it could develop straight into a happily ever after or a Tragic all on its own. Like as soon as they realize that they like the guy they've been fighting with, it turns out that their feelings were all one-sided? Something like that."

Armin turned to her for a moment, pointing in agreement.

Well I'll be darned.

He had heard of the three being combined together to make some over-dramatic romance plot but he had never actually tried putting his mind to it.

"You know," he said as he put his hand back down and turned back to her drink. "Sometimes happily-ever-after's could spring from the Tragic as well." He paused as he carefully made some latte art just for the hell of it. Satisfied, he placed the cream down and picked up the mug. "You know, sad but fulfilling ending. Or one gets a major epiphany or works the guts to tell the other. Stuff like that."

Krista only looked up at him with a quirked brow as he set her fresh cup back on the counter. "Oh yeah, I can kinda see that. I think I already have." She said as she grabbed the handle to bring the drink back up to her lips.

Well at least that's one way to bribe her, Armin thought as he held back a chuckle.

"Not really sure who though. Got anything?"

Now Armin read enough books in his years to reach at least five stories high if you were to stack them all up from the ground to make a tower of fandom trash and intellectual musings, and these books ranged from cringe-worthy romance novels to mainstream young adult staples to the obscure finds you can only see in one of those really old, musky-smelling bookshops in the dark parts of town; with that kind of experience he should've been able to name at least ten couples of that exact premise off the top of his head, and that was just from all the romance novels.

"Kinda, yeah." He said, stifling a grin.

And the only thing that came to mind was his two best friends finally - finally – getting together after at least a decade and a half of repressed sexual tension and awkward third-wheeling.

"Well?" Krista pried, still awaiting his answer.

Armin met her eyes and named the first things off the top of his head.

"Landon and Jamie, A Walk to Remember. The Notebook."

And as soon as he said those words, Armin had to stifle another chuckle as he watched her reactions: first her eyes widened, almost as if someone had just told her that her favorite character just died or that the internet was down for the week. Next she pressed a hand to her mouth, and her eyes went from wide to hazy almost as if she was having a painful flashback. Finally, she dropped her hand back to her lap before promptly slamming her head on the counter in misery.

"Whyyyy,"he heard her mumble onto the marble.

Luckily enough Armin managed to predict her reaction and moved her mug seconds before she would've knocked it over with her head from dramatic falling. He cocked his head to the side, stifling yet another chuckle.

"Pretty sure the movies came out at least a decade ago." He said, brows furrowing but grin still plastered on his face. "How are you not over them?"

"No one is over The Notebook,"She kept her head on the counter but she lifted her hand with a pointer finger for emphasis. Krista slammed her hand on the counter before lifting her head off it, revealing narrowed eyes.

"And one does not simply get over Jamie and Landon."

And in that moment Armin couldn't simply just stifle his laughter anymore and let out a chuckle.

Krista only scowled at him as she reached for her coffee. "Hey, don't act like it didn't emotionally shatter you either." She argued before taking another sip.

He paused to catch his breath. "Well yeah, I did up crying myself to sleep after watching the movies but it can't be that bad-"

"How'd you feel if I suddenly brought up Clannad or 5 Centimeters per Second?" Krista said as she set her cup back on the counter.

Just the mention of the first title was more than enough send Armin to a verbal halt.

He let out a small whimper.

"Exactly," was all Krista said, thrusting her mug in his direction for emphasis before bringing it up to her lips.

Armin shook his head before any more memories of tragic anime romances and songs about families made out of Japanese pastries could flash through his mind.

"Whichever the case," he said as Krista lowered her drink. "The Notebook's a good example of happily-ever-after's coming from the Tragic."

She nodded. "Yeah all the 'your love is like the wind' stuff." She air-quoted with a little snort, and Armin snorted a little at the line as well. "Even Jamie did die, it didn't necessarily end up as tragic as one would think. Happily-ever-after in a way that messes you up."

"Conclusion," Armin piped in. "Nicholas Sparks romances can mess anyone up."

Had he not been completely focused on her as she looked away, he wouldn't have heard the tiny scoff she let out and the low muttering of, "More like just love in general."

"Huh?"

Krista spun back on him so fast her hair mussed up a little on the sides of her face. "Nothing." She said quickly, clearly showing that she was embarrassed of being heard. "Never mind what I just said." She mumbled, immediately reaching for her coffee in a feeble attempt of verbal escape.

Armin was a second faster.

Before Krista was even able to touch it, he had already moved the mug from her reach. "No no no," he said, grinning. "I wanna know what you meant."

Krista only stared at him with a pout.

.

.

.

Armin just stared back patiently.

.

.

.

They held the little staring contest before Krista finally gave in with a sigh.

"Ugh, fine." She said, and Armin gestured with his hand for her to go on.

Her brows furrowed again for the slightest of moments as she gathered her thoughts.

"All I just meant from that is just…well, love is just ridiculous." She started, and he didn't miss the way her hands started fidgeting on the countertop and how she looked at everything else but him.

Guess she isn't all that used to speaking her mind, Armin thought.

"It does things to people, all sorts of things." she continued. "And destiny is even more ridiculous." At this, she broke out into a small smile, and Armin felt his breath hitch a little in his lungs.

"And really, it's all just a matter of what you do with whatever happens to you that'll decide how much you'll let love and destiny mess with you." She finished, looking up to meet his gaze, smile growing a little wider on her gorgeous face.

Armin dumbly blinked back.

"As corny as that sounds," he said as he handed back her drink, blatantly ignoring the small scowl she threw at him. "I have to admit. That was brilliant."

The scowl slid off in an instant. "Really?" she asked, hand halfway up to grab the cup from him.

"Really." He said with a nod, grinning as she eagerly finished the remainder of her coffee. "T'was brilliant. You're brilliant. Have I ever told you that?"

She only shook her head as she lowered the now empty mug.

Armin flashed her another smile. "Well now I have."

She let out a small laugh. "That was just at least three levels of corny."

"Says the girl who just gave out a speech about the wonders of love and destiny?"

"Hey." She said, eyes narrowing. "I get that you can make great coffee and brilliant, Tumblr-worthy book analyses but that doesn't mean you can be such a butt about it."

Did she seriously just use the word butt as an insult?

"Aw, you know you love that about me."

And the 'L' word just slipped out of his mouth just like he did last time. Not that he really bothered to correct himself, but he could be wrong.

Maybe she didn't like as much as he thought she did.

.

.

.

Maybe she was just letting him spend time with her for the short while she's here just to pass the time before she gets sent back to the city to get married.

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Maybe she was just being nice and delicately teetering around his pathetic feelings so that he wouldn't get hurt.

.

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Whichever it was, there was at least something Armin was completely sure of.

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She gave him a small pout before her face broke out into a smile. "Jerk." She said, though the insult held no form of malice and held only affection.

.

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It was that it didn't matter what her reasons were or if she even returned his feelings at all.

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.

He reached over to pinch her nose, and the resulting giggle that erupted from her was more than enough to make him chuckle as well.

.

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.

Having her here with him was already more than enough for him.


It was usually around dinnertime that the common room would be at its noisiest. Around this time of the day, Sina Country Club employees would lounge around the couch or in front of the unlit fireplace while the others would get started on dinner, glad that the day's work was finally over and relishing in their free time.

The girls would be chatting up a storm, eager to tell each other the highlights of their day with some excited squealing if the time called for it. The guys would be the ones taking up the couch, usually playing video games or watching TV.

Jean spared a glance at the latest episode of Game of Thrones playing on the screen as he entered the common room, now out of his riding gear and shamelessly wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt. The instructor immediately made a beeline for a head of shaven hair at the dining hall.

"Hey man." Jean greeted as he occupied the seat beside Connie with a friendly pat on the shoulder. Connie turned to him. "Hey." He muttered.

Petra's voice suddenly sounded. "Alright everyone, dinner!"

And just like that everyone started filing in, chairs screeching against the floorboards as people took their seats at the table.

Jean turned to his right, finding Mikasa taking the seat beside him. "Hey." She greeted.

"Hey." Jean took a look around. "Where's Sasha?"

He intended to address the question only the nurse before him.

Instead it ended up being heard by everyone in earshot.

And said group of people promptly responded.

"Gee, Jean, thought you'd know to be honest."

"Yeah bro."

"Some boyfriend you are." Eren drawled with mock disappointment.

Jean turned the boys in front of him with a scowl.

Mikasa only nudged him with her elbow, a simple yet somehow effective attempt to make him drop the scowl and not take the teasing so seriously.

Jean instinctively turned to her at the contact. "Do you know?"

The nurse only shook her head. Jean pursed his lips before turning to Connie. The other boy only shook his head, not bothering to make eye contact.

A brow furrowed on Jean's end.

What happened to him?

Mina suddenly spoke up. "Actually," she said as she took a seat by the end of the table. "Sasha was here a while ago. She just happened to have dismissed her last session early. Said something about checking inventory at the archery shack?"

The girls around her nodded with a collective sound of affirmation.

"Yeah, something like that."

"Uh-huh."

"She also mentioned taking a while and asked us to save her plate?"

Hanji suddenly emerged from the kitchen, a bowl of soup in her hands. "Well then if that's the case," she set the bowl on the table and pulled the empty chair closest to her. "We might as well do what she asked." She sat herself down and shuffled to get to a comfortable position. "Her sched's pretty full compared to back then. I don't blame her for wanting to check up on everything."

Jean nodded, though his gut didn't really buy anything one bit.

"Maybe she'll show up before everyone finishes?" Armin piped in.

A few voices echoed the statement. Hanji and the other girls only shrugged.

Jean secretly wished for them to be right before helping himself to his meal.

.

.

.

He spent half the time throwing glances at the entrance and the other half of it training his ears to the door if ever she were to show up.

.

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.

She ended up not showing up for dinner at all.

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.

Later that night, Petra had asked where she was yet no one was really able to respond. So instead she just reminded everyone to leave out some dinner for Sasha to pop in the microwave later.

.

.

.

Meanwhile, Jean opted to actually wait for her to get back. Now he was tiredly slumped over the couch as he watched the clock.

9:33

It was almost lights out. By now everyone had already left the common room to go into their rooms.

Where was she? There was no way it took that long to check on inventory, right?

"You're not gonna sleep yet?" Petra asked on her way to the stairs as soon as all the dishes were put away, with Mikasa none too far behind her.

Jean only shook his head, not really finding the words to reply with.

Petra only smiled knowingly. "Alright then. Don't be too long." She paused to pat his shoulder. "Have a good night."

"Yeah, you too." Jean had to bite his tongue to stop himself from adding the word Mom after the statement.

He watched as Petra made her way up the stairs, tearing his gaze as soon as her foot planted on the first step.

He was greeted by the sight of Mikasa who only frowned. She paused in front of him to place a hand on his shoulder in a small smile. "I'll make sure to keep the door unlocked for her. Make sure she gets something to eat?"

He managed a nod. She gave his shoulder a small pat before turning for the stairs. "Goodnight." She called over her shoulder.

"Night." He mumbled back, turning to the door as soon as she had gone up the stairs.

It didn't open as instantaneously as he expected. He leaned back on the couch with a heavy sigh.

This girl.

Jean blankly stared at the wall as he counted the minutes as they passed by.

Three.

.

.

.

Five.

.

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Ten.

And then the door finally opens.

It creaked loudly as Sasha shut it behind her and her voice sounded a little hoarse against the quiet air.

"Jean?" She asked slowly as she took a step closer to him. She stops just a little distance away from the couch, brows furrowed over brown eyes that showed nothing short of surprise and confusion.

"What are you doing here?"

Jean could only swallow a lump in his throat as he faced her.

"I waited for you."

Wow. Real smooth, Kirstein.

He bit his lip. "You haven't eaten dinner yet. Thought maybe you'd want some company?"

She smiles, and instead of shooting warmth through his chest like it usually did, a wave of cold washes over him.

"That would be nice. Thank you."

He shakes off the feeling and pulls up a smile as he pulls out the chair for her. He gestures to it with a hand, silently telling her to sit down.

Sasha's head cocked to the side, and Jean only gestured to it again.

The boy held his breath. Suddenly she took a step.

A breath's release passed by before she took another. She kept that pace until she reached the very front of the chair, and as she did she gives Jean a smile.

Despite the fact he easily knew it was faked he smiled back at her.

"You just sit there while I heat up the leftovers." He said as soon as she started to sit herself down.

"You're being awfully nice." She teased, and if Jean hadn't known better he would've thought she was back to her normal self. "What's that about?"

Despite the joking tone in her voice, Jean pursed his lips as he eased her into her chair. "Just wanted to do something for a friend, is all."

He immediately went straight to the fridge and pulled out the cling-wrapped bowl filled with the soup the others had left behind for her.

Now was probably not a very good time to tell her that he was never a really good cook.

Jean only sighed as he opened the microwave and fumbled around with the switch, hoping he didn't set it too low.

Keep your cool, Jean. Just make sure you don't fuck this up.

In the seconds he let the soup warm up in the microwave only one question seemed to invade his mind.

I wonder…just when did I ever start getting so domestic?

With a sigh he poured the newly heated soup back into the bowl and turned to Sasha. She hadn't spoken the entire time he was cooking.

"Here," He said as put the soup in front of her. He heard her mutter a thank you as he went to the cupboards to grab a spoon and a glass. "Sorry this is all I could manage at the moment."

What the hell am I even doing? He thought as he gave her the spoon and filled the glass with water.

At first she didn't even bother taking her spoon and sort of just plainly stared at the bowl as if spacing out.

Jean bit back a groan. "Well? It's not gonna kill you, Sasha. I'm not that bad of a cook."

She lets out a long breath through her nose in what Jean hoped to be a laugh. "I'll be the judge of that." She said before taking the bowl in her hands and bringing it up to her lips.

As relieved as he was that she got something to eat, Jean still saw it as she took a sip straight from the bowl.

The v-neck of her shirt didn't really reveal much, but it showed enough.

.

.

.

Her collarbones were too sharp.

.

.

.

There was no way that that was healthy.

"Is there something wrong?" she asked as soon as she set the bowl back on the table.

He shakes his head and smiles. "Nothing's wrong at all." He says as he looks back up to face her, fighting the urge to wince at the statement.

As soon as he took a better look at her, though, his nose wrinkled despite himself.

Small bits of spring onion were stuck at the corner of her mouth.

"You have crumbs…" He said, gesturing with his hand over his mouth for emphasis.

"Really?" she asked, hand immediately flying up to her lips. She touched the wrong corner first. "Where?"

Jean suppressed a sigh and before he knew it his own reached up to brush it away.

He would've been able to, anyways, if she hadn't beaten him to it as she brushed the entire back of her hand over her mouth.

Jean froze, suddenly realizing his intention of physical contact and awkwardly reeled his hand back to its place on the table.

"You should really be more careful when you eat, Potato Girl."

She let out another one of those long exhales. "Yeah, I'll keep that in mind." She said with a small smile. Hell, it was too small to even be considered as a smile.

She can't even think of a comeback after I called her Potato Girl…?

"You sure you're alright, Jean?"

Jean snapped his gaze up to her eyes. "Shouldn't you be worrying about yourself first?"

His eyes widened.

Shitshitshitshit why can't I just keep my mouth shut for once?

She shifted in her seat.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She picked up her spoon but didn't bother helping herself to another serving.

Somehow those words made Jean's train of thought turn around immediately and put a scowl on his face.

No, maybe I should. It's about damn time I should confront her about it. She's been holding it in for too long.

Jean turned to her, scowl still in place. "Pardon me for the intrusion but I know you do. You're just refusing to acknowledge it."

Instead of responding she abruptly stood up, the chair screeching loudly against the wooden floor and the spoon landing back on the bowl with an ear-piercing clatter.

"I need to go."

The scowl slid off his face as fast as it appeared. "Wait, Sasha-"

He was cut off by a glower thrown his way.

"Jean, just stop pointing your nose into things that don't concern you." Sasha harshly shoved the chair back into the table. "I'm not a child. Just let me deal with this by myself."

"Well you're acting like a child right now, not wanting to eat and refusing help from people who actually care about you!"

"You don't care about me." She said, and that was enough to shut him up.

Jean stared at her wide-eyed. "What…?"

"You don't care about me." She said again. "You just think you do because you feel like you still owe me from when I saved your sorry ass from an arranged marriage. Well guess what, I wish I hadn't."

Sasha paused to swallow a lump in her throat. "If I hadn't stopped at the wrong church…if I hadn't been so stupid and careless…if I had just…"

"Just what, Sasha?" Jean only scowled at her, feeling more irritation than he did sympathy.

"First of all, you don't get a fucking say on who I care about. Because I fucking do, whether or not I actually owe you anything. And second, did you honestly think that objecting at his wedding would've changed his mind? That if you showed up to him and told him how you felt he would suddenly just choose you over Annie?"

He practically ignored the way Sasha's eyes watered before him, and instead hoped to talk some more sense into her.

"Well guess what Sweetheart, the world doesn't fucking work that way. You don't just tell someone you love them and expect to actually be with them afterwards, especially not when it's already fucking obvious that they have someone else. Is it that hard to get into that thick skull of yours? He will never feel the same wa-"

He was cut off by the impact of her hand as she slapped him across the cheek.

Hard.

Jean felt his face turn sideways at the hit, but he couldn't really bring himself to process the pain.

It stung, sure, but what killed him more was the look on her face.

Sasha just looked plain hurt, eyes just a hair's width on the brink of shedding her tears and shoulders rising up and down so violently under the weight of her breath as if she hadn't been breathing for years.

Suddenly her eyes widened when she finally realized what she had just done.

"Jean…" Sasha whispered as she stared at him in horror.

He instinctively touched where she had just hit him.

There was a trail of moisture right on the skin of his cheek.

His eyes widened.

Blood.

Jean paused to look at his fingers, and sure enough he saw a small stain of red on the tips.

Her nails must've scratched me by accident.

He looked back up at her.

Sasha had a hand up over her mouth, but even so he still heard her mutter apologies over and over again.

"I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry…"

And in that moment, Jean realized that that had been the most honest Sasha had ever been for the past two weeks.

"I'm so sorry, Jean I- I should just go." She said before she turned and fled the dining hall.

"Sasha wait-"

Jean was too late. She had already reached the foot of the stairs.

So instead he watched as she made her way up, the steps creaking more than usual under the heavy force of her footsteps, a sound that served as evidence of the events that had just unfolded.

As soon as her form disappeared from his line of sight, Jean gritted his teeth as he gathered the dinnerware off the table.

He really would've slammed the bowl into the sink, to be honest.

He wouldn't have given a damn if he woke up his coworkers again.

If only the bowl wasn't still half-way full and reminding him of just how bad he had fucked up.

Goddammit Sasha, Jean thought as he hastily ran water over the utensils and immediately put them in their respective cupboards without bothering to dry them.

The noise as he slammed the cupboard close didn't stop his next train of thought, though.

It didn't even leave him as he made his way through the dorm's halls and into his own room.

It haunted him in the minutes before he fell asleep and in the first few moments when he woke the next day.

Sasha would've been able to eat a proper meal that night.

.

.

.

If only I had kept my mouth shut.

.

.

.

Now she had all the more reason to skip breakfast than anything else.

.

.

.

And it was all his fault.


"Hey Connie?"

The buzz-cut turned to the voice as he got off the mat. "Yeah? What's up?"

Reiner only pursed his lips. "About Jean…"

Connie nodded. "Yeah? Something the matter?"

"You can say that." The taller man let out a sigh, and Connie tried to guess whether it was from exhaustion out of his recent warm-up or from the weight of the problem he seemed to have.

"I noticed he's been giving Bertl the evil eye lately. Not sure if I'm imagining it but I'm just trying to make sure here. Is he still holding a grudge from the fight club or something? Or is he really that big of an ass sometimes?"

Connie shook his head.

"Nah. Not that I know of, anyways. And no. He can be a bit of a jerk sometimes but he's not that big of a jerk. You're probably just imagining it."

Damn it, Jean. We get that you're worried about Sasha but it wouldn't kill you to be more discreet about it.

"Where are you going?" Connie asked when the Krav Maga instructor suddenly turned to leave, towel around his neck.

Reiner only turned to him with a grin.

"To heaven."

Without another word Reiner went out of the gym, leaving behind a sighing Berthold and an even more confused Connie.


Sasha could only idly wave back at Flegel Reeves as he headed back to the main building.

He was her last session for the day, leaving her with more than enough free time before everyone else would gather in the dorm for dinner.

Realizing that the common room would be empty anyways, Sasha decided to spend her free time with an old favorite. After returning all the gear back to the shack, the brunette headed back to the employee lodging and into her room to change and grab a novel she had packed in her suitcase before heading back down the stairs.

Been a while since I've actually been here, She thought as she set herself in the couch. Guess I've been hiding too much, huh?

As much as she tried to immerse herself into her reading, there was no betraying Sasha's train of thought as she continued to flip through the pages.

'Most of the standing students timidly returned to their seats. The uncharismatic soldier on the far side dragged the bag containing Hayashida's body to the corner of the classroom, then joined the other two standing by the lectern.'

Why did she even have to feel this way?

'Sakamochi returned to his position behind the lectern. Once again the room turned silent, but that silence was soon broken by the sound of someone groaning in the back, followed by the damp splash of vomit splattering against the floor. Shuya could smell it.'

Why couldn't she have just gotten over him while she still had the chance?

Why did she have to be so stubborn that she couldn't even do that?

The girl closed the book with a loud slam, shaking her head free of any other thoughts before opening it again, eyes immediately resuming from the last paragraph.

.

.

.

And on that day, Sasha had to reread that chapter three times before she was finally sucked into story and not into her own thoughts.


Reiner took in a deep breath.

Okay, no more games this time. Just go up and talk to her, no pick-up lines, no smooth moves. Just the truth.

Reiner smiled to himself.

Yeah, girls love honest guys.

He stopped barely a foot in front of the couch and occupied the seat beside hers.

"Hey." He started. She turned to him with a smile and a small wave.

Reiner took in a deep breath as he set his gaze to the floor.

"Hey so, listen I would really, really like it if we made our random encounters less random so maybe…could we possibly…swap numbers? Maybe even have lunch together if you don't mind as much?"

He probably shouldn't have said all that in one breath. Now Reiner was practically panting as she waited for her answer.

Instead of smiling like what he expected, Krista removed an earphone off her left ear and looked at him quizzically.

"Oh, I'm sorry?"

Somehow that reaction hurt him more than when Eren threw Connie at him in the fight club just a few days ago.

Reiner shook his head and stood up. "Nothing."

"Oh. Okay." He heard her say before she turned back to her phone.

He spared one last glance at the girl, shoulders slumping as he trudged his way toward the counter.

(He doesn't even know why he was headed there in all honesty, but well...broken hearts make people do the weirdest things.)

With a half-sigh-half-groan, Reiner set his hand on the wood, an action done out of exhaustion and plain misery that startled Samuel from checking in with the reception computer.

"Bro." he said after jumping in place.

Reiner raised his other hand in apology. "Sorry." The hand dropped like a dead bird at his side. Reiner only let out a sigh.

Dang it. Maybe next time?

Maybe they just had a rocky start? Maybe she just wasn't into straightforward guys? Was she the type who enjoyed traditional courting and all of that kind of stuff?

In all his desperation, the instructor turned to his raven-haired colleague. "Say, Samuel?"

The said boy looked back up from the monitor with a raised brow. "Yeah? Anything I could help you with?"

"Since you're on reception and all, you know everyone who checks in at the hotel, right?"

Samuel only narrowed his eyes at him. "If it's gossip from the state's wealthiest you're looking for, just wait for Mina to comeback. She's still in the bathroom."

Reiner shook his head. "No, nothing like that." he paused for a brief moment. "Actually it kinda is something like that, think you can help a guy out?"

His colleague drops the narrowed gaze with a surrendered sigh. "Fine. What do you need to know?" he asks, his voice practically near monotonous.

He's probably done this countless of times.

"You know Krista, right?"

Samuel only raised a hand. "Imma have to stop you right there. You should know that you're actually just wasting your time."

A brow raised on Reiner's end. "Huh? What makes you say that?"

Yeah sure, he's been off to a rocky start and his moves practically border on being pathetic but he didn't have to be such an ass about it. Honestly.

"See for yourself." Samuel said, nodding to the lobby in from of him.

Reiner follows the nod towards the bay window to see Krista on her feet...

Only to be discreetly pulled into a hug by another blonde.

"Armin?"

He didn't really notice that he said his thought out loud. She and Armin were together the whole time? And Armin didn't tell him?

Jesus Christ, he really did just waste his time.

"How long have they…?"

"Since last week? Not completely sure. I have to watch them go all goo-goo eyes on each other every night." He proves his point by nodding towards them again, and this time Reiner joined him as he witnessed the discreet public display of affection and them disappearing to the door Reiner remembered to lead to the back garden.

"Hate to break it to you but they're a thing. Sorry, man."

Reiner nodded, shoulders drooping even more as he left the main building, most likely cry himself to sleep later that night.

And on that day, Reiner no longer believed in love at first sight.

And in angels, apparently.

The instructor arrives in the common room with a stagger, the cabin's hardwood floors threatening to break in protest to his footsteps.

It wasn't even fifteen minutes pass lunch, leaving the common mostly empty, save for the brunette who was seated on the couch with her nose buried in a book.

Funny, Reiner thought. Don't remember her being the reading kind back in uni.

"You alright?" Sasha asked as Reiner slumped on the couch in a dilapidated lump, the seat's cushions shuffling oddly loud as his back met them.

"No."

The girl lowered her worn-down copy of Battle Royale on the coffee table before turning to the boy. "What happened?"

Reiner sat himself a little more properly on the couch (if only out of courtesy) but made sure his gaze never met hers. "Well you see there's this girl…"

"And I'm assuming you like her?"

"Yes! I mean no. I mean well," he was stuttering now. Great. "Not anymore at least. At least I think so."

"What happened, then?"

"So this girl, she's gorgeous. Absolutely amazing. I thought she was an angel the first time I saw her."

Sasha only nodded.

"And I dunno, I just had a feeling, I guess. Anyways, I tried pulling some of my moves on her."

"And they failed?" she cut in again.

"How did you know?"

Her answer couldn't have been more straightforward.

"You wouldn't be slumped like dirty laundry on the couch otherwise."

Reiner let out a bitter sort of chuckle. "Right. But get this, that's not the end of it."

"Hm?"

"Turns out that she was actually dating one of our coworkers. Armin."

"Ah. So what's got you so upset then? The fact that none of your moves worked? Or the fact that she was taken?" she moves her legs under her so that she was sitting Indian-style on the couch. "Don't tell me it was because she's with Armin of all people."

"None of that. If anything I just didn't really expect it to be Armin at all. More like pissed that I just wasted my time I guess? Like for a minute there I really thought I had a chance but then turns out I didn't? Something like that?"

Sasha gives him a small smile of sorts. "Don't worry about it, Reiner. You don't really have to justify your feelings." he watches her keep her eyes on her legs, one hand mindlessly tracing patterns on the fabric of her jeans. "Do you still like her though? Even after…well, Armin?"

"Not completely sure. All I know is that I doubt I'd ever feel the same about her ever again."

Sasha only gave him a nod. "It's like that for a lot of people. First they're completely head over heels for someone then next they end up sinking themselves into misery for the same reason." She breathes out a sigh. "Whichever the case, it's actually good you knew about her and Armin now before you end up wasting even more of your time. Better get hurt now and feel better later than keep your hopes up and getting ten times more hurt in the end. Trust me on that one."

He nodded before eyeing her skeptically.

"You talk like it's from experience. Is there something you haven't been telling me, Sasha?"

She shook her head with a cheeky smile. "Nah. Chalk it up to women intuition."

"Right. No way you'd actually be talking from experience anyways. Not when it's obvious a certain someone has feelings for you."

She only shakes her head again. "Nah. I highly doubt it."

"He really does seem to care about you. Jean, I mean." Despite the quizzical look Sasha gave him, Reiner pressed on. "Even if he hasn't realized it himself, I can tell that he has feelings for you. Do masculine honor a favor and give him a chance?"

He didn't really get why he was telling her that of all things, but they were the first thing that came to mind.

Her brows furrow, but before she was able to reply the door opens behind them.

Speak of the devil.

Jean only eyed the two with a raised brow. "Am I interrupting something?"

Reiner could only watch as Sasha began to shuffle off the couch.

"No, not really." he heard the girl mutter under her breath. "I need to go." She murmured before she went straight to the stairs and disappeared to the second floor, the wood creaking under her as she went along.

Reiner noticed the book sitting on the table and picked it up with slow hum.

"She left this behind." he said as he stood up and handed Jean the novel.

Much to his surprise, the other boy hadn't torn his gaze away from the stairs.

Realizing that he most likely wasn't going to get a response out of Jean any time soon, Reiner set the book back on the table before heading off to his room. He couldn't help but give Jean one last glance before he shut the door, though.

The other instructor still had his eyes glued to the stairs even as the rest of their coworkers began filing in the common room. Almost as if he was expecting Sasha to come back down.

Reiner fought back a grin as he moved through the hallway and closed the door behind him with a chuckle.

Damn.

And here he thought he knew what it meant to be in love with someone.


Thursday night after dinner, as soon as everyone was in their rooms. That was their agreement.

Jean, Connie and Mikasa were seated on the couch in silence, and while it was an awkward silence considering the three of them weren't really keen on speaking considering they pretty much failed at the one job they were given, it was kind of comforting as well, in its own empathetic way.

"We gave her space." Connie started. "And she hasn't bothered talking to anyone. We try reaching out her and she still wouldn't talk to us…" he palmed his scalp. "Dammit, even back then she wasn't this difficult."

"She still isn't eating." Jean said quietly.

He may have left out that the intensifying of it was partially his fault, but the guilt still made him not want to meet his friends' gazes.

So instead he busied himself with his sketchpad, hand mindlessly drawing on the pages.

From the corner of his eye he noticed Connie nodding. "Yeah, no shit." The buzz-cut let out a sigh. "It kinda gets more obvious the more she does it. I've tried giving her some snacks every now and then during break so she'd at least have something in her belly."

"And?" Jean prodded.

"She barely even eats half of it."

The other boy would've flinched at Connie's words but instead held and released a breath as he continued sketching.

Mikasa spoke up. "I know for a fact that she really has lost weight. The other day she asked if she could borrow a belt from me." Jean didn't miss the way her shoulders dropped. "She never needed a belt before that. Ever." She let out a heavy exhale not too different from the one Connie just released.

"Even Eren's noticed it. He even rechecked the med records. He hasn't found anything but he's still really suspicious."

"I honestly thought you would've told him about the situation." Connie said.

Mikasa only shook her head. "If I did, Berthold would be Eren's sole test subject for a month."

Connie nodded. "Yeah." He turned to Jean. "I don't know if you know this, Jean, but Eren thinks of Sasha as his sister of sorts. Gets super overprotective of her. Almost as scary as Mikasa is over him."

Mikasa shot him a look. Connie only raised his hands in mock surrender. "Not my fault you two have serious OAG tendencies. Well in Eren's case it's more like Overly Protective Brother than Overly Attached Girlfriend but you get the gist. OAG is more you, anyways."

The raven only shook her head at Connie with a sigh. "Anyways," she says, obviously trying to get back on topic.

"Berthold would be Eren's target. Eren's only target. With his demeanor he'd probably just take it. I'm assuming you know what happened to Mike Zacharius, right?"

Jean nodded. "Well, yeah but wouldn't it be better if he was gone?" he asked. "Seriously, it would do Sasha a lot of good if he did."

Connie spoke up. "I'm not really sure about that, Jean."

When Jean looked up from his work for a brief moment to quirk a brow at him, Connie took this as a sign to continue.

"Reiner really seems to like it here, and by the looks of things everyone seems to like having him around as well, but if Bert were to leave he'd most likely leave as well. And if Sasha were to find out why they left she'd just feel even more miserable." He rubbed his scalp. "That wouldn't do much good for anyone."

"What can we do then? She's been starving herself and avoiding eye contact with just about everyone." Jean ran hand through his hair out of frustration. "She's probably crying herself to sleep every night, for all we know."

Everyone noticed how Mikasa seemingly froze in place. "Jean…" she started slowly, almost as if holding a grenade in her words. "I don't know if you know this but…she hasn't cried at all."

That was enough to make Jean flinch in his place, hand messing up the shading and leaving behind a dark streak going beyond the lines as he looked up.

"What?"

Mikasa seemed startled at his reaction and froze before continuing. "Every night since he arrived at the club…sure she looked really down at night but she never cried. She was just…quiet, if that was one way to put it. The same way she acts in front of the staff, basically."

Silence cast over the three for a few moments.

"If she keeps this up any longer like that she's gonna break." Connie said quietly as he ran a hand over his buzz-cut once more, a habit Jean noticed the shorter man did whenever he was especially stressed or agitated.

In this case it seemed to be both.

"I think you got it wrong, Mik." Jean suddenly said, dropping his sketchpad and pencil onto the coffee table with a near inaudible sound.

The other two glanced at him both in curiosity and confusion. Jean took his friends' silence as his sign to continue.

"Quiet is what you use to describe people like Annie and Berthold and you, even." He said, gesturing to the raven. "Quiet is what you use for someone who's naturally silent, someone who doesn't really find the need to use too many words to communicate by choice. But Sasha…" he unconsciously swallowed a lump in his throat.

"Sasha's always been the opposite of that. She's fucking loud to the point of being noisy, and sometimes to the point of being goddamn annoying. She picks fights whenever she can and refuses to back down unless she wins. She isn't the kind who could keep her mouth shut. She's not quiet. She's never quiet. It's just not in her nature."

Jean unconsciously garnered in a heavy breath, trying to push back the memory of her broken and watery gaze from the other night. "From what I know so far, anyways."

It's only been half a month, dammit. I can't go around talking about her like that just yet.

"She isn't being quiet, basically. She's being voiceless to mentally recuperate herself from all the times throughout the day she had to pretend she wasn't miserable." Jean said, looking down to gaze at the floor.

Silence wasn't a form of coping or healing.

It was the body's natural defense mechanism if it hadn't let itself go yet.

One can only go so long without a sound.

Silence wasn't the remedy.

It was the loudest cry of help there was.

Had Jean kept his gaze on his friends instead of on the ground, he would've been able to see the growing smile on Mikasa's face. "You know what, I think maybe she'll just let it all out once she's with the right person."

"What are you getting at?" Jean asked as he looked up. He failed to notice Connie also fighting back a grin beside him.

Mikasa only patted him in the shoulder as she got up, Connie following suit.

"You'll understand it soon enough."

"Yeah. You'll know when it happens, muchacho." He said as he patted the boy's other shoulder. The buzz-cut spared a glance at the sketchbook that still laid open on the coffee table, its latest work blatantly displayed for any curious eye.

On the page was a rough but very detailed sketch of an arrow.

Connie smiled knowingly before turning to look at Mikasa, who was doing the same behind her ever-present scarf.

The pair turned to Jean with a goodnight as they set off for their rooms, their way of ending their…meeting of sorts.

Jean watched as they moved out of the common room, Connie plunging deeper into the hallway and into his own room and Mikasa making a left and disappearing up the stairs, the wood creaking beneath her as she went along.

He had to admit, he still considered Mikasa to be a great person, whether or not he did have feelings for her.

Never would he have expected that they would be as good friends as they were now, looking after a mutual friend with equal concern while working at the same place.

Jean let his thoughts wonder to his high school memories, from first time he met Mikasa to the first fist fight he had with Eren.

He let his mind go over his younger years until it stumbled across a certain French term he had learned from his mother when he was younger.

One that he didn't expect to become victim to when he was in high school.

La Douleur Exquise, Jean thought to himself. It was there that he had come to realize that it was exactly the same thing Sasha was suffering from as well.

La Douleur Exquise, he thought again.

The heart-wrenching pain of wanting someone you can't have.

Jean let out a sigh as he pinched the bridge of his nose before standing up and gathering his things off the coffee table. He spared a glance at his latest work.

He let out a small, humorless chuckle.

Damn.

She was worrying him so much that she had become part of his sub-conscience.

Every spare thought he had would direct back to her. Every unfocused glance would end up in her direction. Every time he had nothing to do, his feet would eventually lead him to where she was, only for him to back away awkwardly when he realized he was going too close to her without an actual reason to be.

Even back in that mess of a brawl Eren dared to call a fight club, the thought of her flashed through his mind when he found himself facing off against Berthold.

He felt the direct urge to physically harm a man he barely even knew.

An urge he knew could only be influenced by either jealousy or unbridled rage.

This was however, the first time Jean considered that the urge wasn't directed by either of the two.

Somewhere, in the deepest crevices of his mind he knew but will never admit, not even to himself.

.

.

.

It was because of both.

.

.

.

Before he was able to completely ponder on the thought, though, Jean decided to leave it for the night and head back to his room for some much needed sleep.


Mikasa gently rapped on the door before opening it.

She was immediately met by the sight of Sasha sitting on her bed.

The weird thing was about that was the fact that that all her roommate did. She didn't even react to the sound of the door opening behind her, and instead just sat there as if she had been for hours, brown eyes so transfixed on the floorboards below her one might as well think they were the most fascinating thing in the world.

The nurse had to fight back a frown and bit her lip before forcing a small smile as she shut the door behind her.

"Hey."

Sasha immediately looked up, and Mikasa had to ignore the way her roommate practically flinched at the sound of her voice like a small woodland creature.

"H-hey." The brunette said, a small smile immediately gracing her features.

Mikasa did her best to smile back as genuine as possible as she brushed back how the one on Sasha's face was anything but.

"I didn't see you at breakfast?" she asked, making sure to keep the tone of her voice as casual as possible as she sat down beside her.

It only proved to be useless when Sasha flinched again. Anyone else wouldn't have noticed the small stiffening in the girl's shoulders. Hell, it was too small to even be seen be considered a shudder but Mikasa knew better.

The nurse watched the way her roommate hesitated for a split second before answering and used the dead air to stand up from her bed and stretch the kinks in her back.

"Yeah." She said, nodding as she headed toward her trunk at the foot of her bed. "I kinda got up earlier than everyone else then helped myself."

Mikasa feigned a nod back as Sasha opened the chest and reached into it, only to frown as the brunette froze in her actions altogether for a few moments.

A few moments too long, apparently.

"Sasha."

"Yeah?"

"You're spacing out again."

"Oh. Sorry about that." She said, sheepishly pulling up the corners of her mouth.

Mikasa pursed her lips together, feeling both irritated and empathetic all at once as she watched her roommate pull out an all too familiar jacket out of the trunk before closing it.

The nurse had to stifle back a sigh.

What am I gonna do with you?

If Sasha was aware of her roommate's gaze on her, she pretended not to notice as she fiddled with the hem of her – no, his – jacket. She took a few steps, immediately heading to the door.

"I need to check on something." She hastily muttered as she went along.

"Sasha."

The raven called out again, this time she had hushed her voice to what she hoped to be a more soothing tone yet that made Sasha flinch even more.

"Yes?" Sasha answered, not making the move to turn to her roommate as she did.

"Can you please stop acting like I don't know?"

She didn't miss the way Sasha practically turned to stone in place, fingers barely a few inches short of grasping the door's knob. Noting this, Mikasa decided to press on.

Better I do this now than any other time.

"I understand what you're going through, I really do, but you can't keep this up." She stood up to approach her roommate and firmly plant a hand on her shoulder. "Can you please just talk to us?"

Sasha suddenly turned to face her, effectively making her drop her hand off her shoulder.

"And what exactly do you expect me to talk about, then? How everyday has been a living hell for me ever since he arrived? How much it hurts to be in the same room as him after I practically fucked up at objecting at his wedding? How I can't do a damn thing about the fact that I'm in love with someone else's husband?"

The words were nothing short of angry, but the tone of her voice was so fragile, so close to breaking that Mikasa opted to tune her out and instead note her body language.

She's not making eye contact.

Her head was slightly drooped down.

Her hands were practically limp at her sides.

She's…tired.

Sasha suddenly crossed her arms over her chest in insecurity. "Please, Mikasa, enlighten me."

"Anything's better than what you've been doing to yourself lately." Mikasa said evenly, unfazed by her roommate's words when most people would flinch.

Sasha reeled back and blinked a few times as if she had been slapped.

She might as well have been, to be honest.

Mikasa's words were enough to completely stun her into breathless silence.

"You've gone numb, Sasha. And I'm not the only one who's worried about you." She noticed the small distressed flicker in Sasha's eyes and pushed on. "Can you please just talk to us?"

Mikasa was only met with silence, along with Sasha's aversion of her gaze.

So she waited for her response.

And waited.

Until Sasha suddenly reached for the doorknob and opened it with a soft click.

"I'll think about it." She said before leaving and shutting the door behind her.

The raven only let out a sigh as she shook her head.

She sighed again, reaching a hand up to rub her temples to ease the tension that had suddenly appeared.

Why did she have to be so difficult and leave just like that?

Then again, Mikasa couldn't really blame her.

Sometimes running away was the only thing you can do.

It was just so much easier to do when you've spent most of your life facing everything head on. Just aimlessly fleeing as long and as far as you possibly can from your problems so you can think you're finally away from their reach.

That was at least until you meet something – someone – that would stand in the way, sending you to a screeching halt without warning and urging you to get back there and silence the ghosts that haunt you so they won't end up catching up to your future.

And sometimes, that roadblock might actually be the same thing that helps you along the way, or might even be the one to silence the ghosts for you.

Mikasa dropped her hands off her temples, headache finally subsiding, and had to suppress a smile.

.

.

.

Your turn, Jean.


"So," Sasha started as she and Krista headed over to the collapsible table, both of them drenched in sweat from their recently concluded session.

"You and Armin, huh?"

The brunette could only smirk as Krista flushed a bright pink in the middle of removing her arm guard.

"Y-yeah."

"So how did that happen?" Sasha pressed on as she removed her own gear. She knew she wasn't in any position to ask about her client's love life but anything was better than conversations that had played out earlier that day.

.

.

.

Can you please just talk to us?

.

.

.

Well you're acting like a child right now, not wanting to eat and refusing help from people who actually care about you!

.

.

.

You know you can always talk to me, right?

Sasha shook her head and forced all her attention to Krista's words.

"By chance I guess? I bumped into him by a café and spilled both of our drinks and I offered to replace it."

"And?"

Krista huffed, realizing she couldn't really escape Sasha's interrogating. "We may have spent some time together at a table there…"

"Awww. So did you set up an elaborate plan that led you to meeting him here?"

The blonde shook her head. "No, it was by chance that I met him here."

Sasha nodded. "Ah I see. Had it been anyone else I would've said that you were moving way too fast but then again…" she trailed off to give Krista a meaningful look. "I guess arranged marriage is all the more reason to want to spend as much time together, huh?"

By now Krista's face rivaled a tomato in color as she nodded. Suddenly she stopped nodding to look back up at her instructor.

"Hey Sasha?"

"Hm?" she responded, a little startled by the sudden question.

"Since it wasn't actually my wedding that you were intending to crash that day…whose was it, if you don't mind me asking?"

Sasha shifted uncomfortable in place.

"I'd really rather not talk about it…"

Krista nodded. "Oh, that's alright, I won't pry." She said. "Are you two still in contact at least?"

The brunette managed a stiff nod in return.

"Yeah. You can say that."

Of course seeing each other on a daily basis was considered contact.

And it hurt.

It hurt having to be in the same room as him when he doesn't know a single thing.

It hurt that Annie was actually such a great girl yet she can never bring herself to spend time with her like her other colleagues because she was in love with her husband.

It hurt having to lie to her friends about her whereabouts when really she's only been meaning to dodge him.

What hurt the most, though, was how she had been so close.

All it took was a small shred of courage and a few minutes alone.

That was all it took and that was she ever was.

So.

.

.

.

Damn.

.

.

.

Close.

.

.

.

"Sasha?"

The brunette blinked a few times before turning back to her student.

"Oh. Sorry, Krista. Just spacing out, I guess."

Krista pouted and hummed, a sound that voiced her disappointment and disbelief. "You've been doing that a lot lately. Are you sure you're alright?"

Sasha nodded, and by now she had already perfected making it look less desperate and more believable. "Yeah. Don't worry about it."

Her student seemed convinced enough. "Okay." She said, nodding as she set down her bow on the table and remove her armguard. Sasha followed suit.

"Hey Sasha?" Krista asked again as soon as her hair was back in place, albeit sounding more reluctant than the last time.

"Hm?" Sasha asked, looking up as she set her own gear on the table.

The brunette didn't miss the way her student's eyes gave her entire body a once-over and stiffened out of insecurity. "I know I'm in no position to pry but…have you been on a diet lately?"

Shit.

Sasha slowly shook her head.

"No. Why?"

"You just…you seem a little thinner than I remember, I guess. Your uniform's been looking a little looser on you."

"Oh?" Sasha said as she looked down at her own midsection for a split second. "I haven't really noticed."

She had to give herself credit. Even if she hated lying to Krista, or to everyone, really, she definitely grew into a better liar than she could've ever expected.

In all honesty, though, Sasha won't deny the fact that she had been…minimizing her portions lately. It wasn't a diet, obviously, she just hadn't been feeling very hungry lately.

No one could blame her for not having much of an appetite, right?

Eating just becomes less of a necessity the more you had on your mind.

Luckily enough for her, Krista only shrugged at her response. "Maybe it was just a trick of the light, then."

Sasha inwardly sighed in relief.

"Anyways," the blonde said, making the move to untie and retie her hair, smoothing back flyways as she did. "It's Friday, meaning equestrian is up. I'll see you tomorrow?"

Sasha responded with another nod, but as soon as she did she felt a wave nausea crash over her, immediately planting a hand on the table. Krista didn't seem to notice as much.

She only watched as the blonde girl proceeded to style her hair back into a ponytail and set off with a short wave.

Sasha managed a small smile and wave back.

Then suddenly she felt her pulse ring in her ears.

.

.

.

Spots started to blur her vision.

.

.

.

Her feet gave way under her.

.

.

.

The last thing Sasha remembered seeing was the slope of Krista's back as she walked towards the equestrian grounds.

.

.

.

And then the world turned completely black.


A/N: GUESS WHO'S BACK.

So basically this was one of the most challenging chapters to write, only because of the length due to ridiculous inconsistencies. I really did consider to cut this in half again but I really didn't just have the time. This hasn't been beta read so please please please forgive any errors, whether technical or plot-wise. Also, I'm done with making promises with update times coz really, when have I ever posted on the date I said?

Anyways, shoutout to my big brother for helping out with the fight scenes. I can't write dynamic action for my life.

TO ALL OF YOU WHO REVIEWED, FOLLOWED AND FAVORITED: THANK YOU SO MUCH LIKE. I CAN'T EVEN. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE AND KIND WORDS.

til next time, my lovelies! (^o^)V

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