By this time, Sherlock and Joon are wandering around campus, heading for Dickenson Hall. As they walk, they keep sneaking looks at each other. Sherlock breaks the awkward tension first.

Sherlock: OK, you've got questions.

Joon: Uh, duh... First off, where are we going?

Sherlock: A crime scene. Next?

Joon: Who are you? And what do you do? What are you studying?

Sherlock: What do you think?

Joon: I'd say... private detective... and criminology major?

Sherlock: I'm sensing a "but" here.

Joon: The campus police don't go to private detectives, especially not student private detectives.

Sherlock: I'm a consulting detective, the only one in the world. I invented the job.

Joon: What does that even mean?

Sherlock: It means when the police or the cadets are out of their depth, which is always, by the way, they consult me.

Joon: The police don't consult amateurs.

Sherlock: Actually, in this case, Lestrade, Donovan, and Anderson are actually concerned students.

Joon: Wait, what?

Sherlock: Over the weekend, when I said I'd looked you up on social media, you'd looked surprised.

Joon: Well, yeah, especially since the only social media you seem to be connected to is your detective blog. How did you know?

Sherlock: I didn't know; I saw. And I could've sworn I told you this already. The school's housing department gave me enough information to track you down.

Joon just stares at her.

Sherlock: And then, there's your brother and your iPad. You're a college student, and you couldn't have afforded it on your own. You wouldn't have bought it. It's a gift. There are scratches, not just one, but many over time. It's probably been dropped several times, and with no case. I don't see how you would treat this one luxury item like that, so it's had a previous owner. This next bit's easy.

Joon: The tape?

Sherlock: Corey Watson, clearly a family member who's given you his old iPad. Not your dad... This is a young adult's gadget. Could be a cousin, but you're a college student with no place to live. Unlikely you've got an extended family so close to campus, or one that you even like... So, brother it is. Now, Noelle. Three kisses say it's a romantic attachment. I'm thinking it's a young couple, and this Noelle got the money to pay for such an expensive tablet from her parents. She must've given it to him recently. This model's only six months old. The relationship's in trouble. It's been six months, and he's already given it away. If she'd left him, he would've kept it out of sentiment. No, he wanted rid of it. He left HER. He gave the iPad to you, so he wants you to keep in touch while you're at school. You're looking for cheap accommodations, but there's no way you can go to your brother for help, what with your problems with him, and the distance from your classes. Maybe you liked Noelle, or you don't like his underage drinking.

Joon: How can you possibly know about the drinking?

Sherlock: A really good shot in the dark. There are a ton of scratches around the outlet where you plug in the power cord. Every night, he goes to charge it, but his hands are shaking. You'd never see those scratches if the user was sober, and you'd always see them if the user was a drinker. You were right.

Joon: I was right? About what?

Sherlock: The cops don't consult amateurs.

Joon: That... was... awesome!

Sherlock: You really think so?

Joon: Hell yeah! It was extraordinary, quite extraordinary.

Sherlock: You're a college student! Why are you talking like that? And anyway, that sort of thing isn't what people normally say.

Joon: What do people normally say?

Sherlock: Piss off!

Joon: (Jokingly:) This is America! Why are you talking like that?

She and Sherlock burst out into hysterical laughter.

Sherlock: I'm actually a psychology student, by the way, not a criminology student.

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