Mako's Message: ...

Ya know, I don't really have anything to say about this chapter and I don't feel like waiting to come up with something so...

Enjoy!


I can't believe I fucked up again.

This is the third time I've made an ass out of myself in front of Dave in three months.

And this time it was in front of other people. Even worse, it was in front of KATIE.

At least I wasn't naked this time.

Everything was going fine. Everything was normal. Just another of day of training. Dave was taking a break, I was working with Angela, trying to correct her stance, so Katie went to go get something to drink.

I had my back to her, so I didn't know she stopped to talk to Dave until I heard them talking. She asked him, "So, did you ever decide about college?"

And as soon as she said the word "college" it was like my blood turned to ice. Not just a chill down my spin or some shit, I was frozen, and I was actually terrified of what he was going to say.

And of course he said the worst possible thing, "Oh, yeah, I'm starting this fall. QCC."

I kinda screamed, "What?" when he said that, and everybody just started staring at me.

Dave said, "What?"

And, still screaming, I said, "What did you say?"

He looked all confused and said, "That I'm starting at QCC?"

"WHY?!"

And he just blinked at me, like he didn't understand why I was screaming and said, "So I can get an education and a decent job?"

"You HAVE a 'decent' job!"

Then he just gave me that look and said, "I wouldn't call NYBC a decent job. And even if I did, I don't want to work there my whole life."

And that just threw me off for a second, but after I figured out what he meant I said, "You have TWO jobs! One is okay and you don't even need it, and the other is AWESOME!"

And then it was Dave's turn to look surprised, and he said, "I don't plan on doing this until I die, Mindy."

So I said, "Oh, so you're just going to ditch me then?"

And Dave said, "What? No! Who said anything about ditching you?"

I said, "You did! When you said you were going off to college!"

Then he facepalmed and said, "Mindy, QCC is Queensborough Community College. I'm not going anywhere. Now will you stop yelling?"

Then I said, "Oh, okay, that makes it SO much better! So you'll be around for another, what? Four years? Then you're going to go off and get a 'REAL' job and go live a normal life with Riley?!"

"What is WRONG with you?! We can't keep doing this forever! Eventually we're going to have to hang it up, or we're BOTH going to die out there! Our luck wont last forever and I don't know about you but I want to have a life after this!"

"This IS my LIFE! This is WHO and WHAT I am and I wouldn't give it up for anything! I thought you felt the same!"

"Things change Mindy! You might get shot and killed tomorrow. Or crippled next week. Or maybe you'll luck out and live to be Hit Granny. But I'm not you. I want to die peacefully, and not from being beaten to death in the street. So someday, I AM going to quit. Maybe it'll be a decade from now. Maybe it'll be tomorrow."

"That's why I NEED you Dave! And you need ME! We're partners!"

And then Dave said, "We ARE partners. And partners should help each other and respect their decisions."

"Maybe I'd respect them if they weren't to pussy out on the one thing you're actually good at to go live a boring ass life behind a desk with your perfect barbie fuck doll!"

Everything was silent after that. The kind of silence were it's not just everyone stopped talking, but where everybody stopped breathing. Where everyTHING stopped moving and if you didn't know better you'd think even everyone's heart had stopped beating.

It's those moments that give you clarity. Like the eye of a storm. A moment that let's you think, "Oh shit."

And Dave was the first to start moving again. He stood up straight, looked right at me, and said, "I'm done here." and walked out.

It's rare for me to be frozen. Not like, "Oh shit, freeze, don't make a sound, don't move" frozen, but the kind of frozen where you're screaming at yourself to move but you can't.

By the time I could make myself move he was already out the door and he'd locked it behind him. It only took me a second to unlock it, but it was all the time he needed to be gone.

He didn't answer any of my calls. He didn't answer Angela's calls. He didn't answer Katie's calls either, but none of us actually thought he would.

I thought that after he'd had time to cool down, he'd let me talk to him, but he didn't show up for our morning jog. I waited so long that Angela called me and asked me if I was coming.

I told her practice was canceled today.

I don't know what to do.