"Your girl gave you a free pass." Lisana stumbles into me, a beer in one hand.

"I should have gone home with her." I steady Lisana and pull her closer to the wall so she doesn't have to use me as support.

"C'mon." Lisana giggles, she's definitely had more than she should.

"have some fun." She giggles harder and grabs my shoulder to keep from falling over. she smells like a terrible concoction of cheap beer, vodka and skunk

"Are you high?" I ask pushing her back once again. she lurched forward and wound her arms around my neck, her beer sloshes out and down the back of my shirt.

"Okay…" I grab her wrists and push her back "you've had way too much for one night."

"Why are you being such a buzz kill?" Lisana pouts trying to latch onto me again.

"you're not thinking straight right now, Lisana." I try to guide her away from me but she's pressed herself against me and she keeps wrapping her arms around my neck the second she gets her hands free.

"How serious are you and Lucy?" she looks at me with bloodshot eyes.

"Lisana?" I shake my head at her "you know I love her, why are you asking me about Lucy?"

"I like you, Natsu." Lisana declares.

"I like you too." I say, "you're a good friend." She frowns and shakes her head.

"No, I mean I really like you." She smiles and she pulls me down toward her.

"I get it, Lisana." I try not to laugh, I forgot how weird Lisana gets when she parties.

"break up with Lucy." She says.

"What!" I exclaim trying to unlatch her arms from my neck "what are you talking about?"

"Break up with Lucy and then we can date." She giggles and pulls herself closer.

"Lisana, you need to let me go right now." I grab her wrists again.

"NO!" She yells jumping onto me, she wraps her legs around me.

"Lisana!" I stumble back and my foot catches on something and we both fall.

Lisana grabs my face and kisses me. I lay on my back with Lisana straddling me and her mouth on mine and she smells like the first girl who kissed me in high-school. It was a house party, we were dumb and drank too much and I girl I had seen every day in school and never spoke to, kissed me and then puked on me.

"Lisana !" I grab her by her shoulders and roll her off. Lucy actually showed me that, she learned it at a self -defense class she went to. Well… it works.

"Natsu!" Heath pouts at me on the ground, her eyes drooping and her lipstick smeared.

"Why would you do that?" I demand, I feel sick that I've cheated on Lucy and angry that Lisana would do that and scared because now I have to tell Lucy and with that guy bothering her and a terrible reunion with her mother I don't know how much more stress she can take.

"Help me up, Natsu." Lisana holds her hand out to me and for some stupid reason I help her to her feet and I guide her to the couch and then I'm running.

New York city is a place that never sleeps, it's full of so many people it's stressful just to think about. Lucy loves that about New York. She loves people and movement and lights but unlike everyone else here she notices everything around her. She knows the guy down at the flower shop and she knows the old lady that walks her cat passed our house every morning and she knows every person in our building and invites them to thanksgiving dinner, maybe one person will show up but she invites them anyway, she makes cards and hand delivers them. She always wants to make everyone else happy. What does anyone do for her? Her mom treats her like garbage, she's got some guy stalking her and I cheat on her? What kind of person does that to a girl like Lucy?

My chest heaves and I hack up mucus from the cold air. I'm nowhere near home and the everything is closed and I don't know how to tell Lucy I kissed another girl. I fall back against an apartment building to catch my breath. My chest hurts and my legs burn and my mouth still taste like cheap beer. I sink to the ground and drop my head what am I gonna tell Lucy…

I wallow in self-pity for about half an hour before I push myself back to my feet and head home. I don't want to tell Lucy what happened but honesty always works better with Lucy than anything else. The truth she can work with, she can't handle being lied to. I wonder if that's because of her mom I think as I pass an awkward scattering of handmade type shops, they're the kind of apartments above them, the owners don't make much but they're definitely proud of their work.

One shop in particular has a really nice display with a sign reading 'for that special someone' they're mostly silver half heart necklaces. Like the kind best friends give to each other in junior high. There's a set of puzzle pieces next to each other and it makes me stop. There's nothing exceptionally special about them. They're just puzzle pieces that fit together like the hearts would. There's nothing special about them… except everything.

I find myself knocking on the door at three in the morning. I shouldn't, at this time. Lucy would be upset that I woke someone up for her but I can't risk missing them.

"Please answer." I call upward hoping someone will hear me. No lights come on upstairs but the door opens to reveal a little old man, he's got these circle lensed glasses and he kind of reminds me of the guy who fixed Woody in toy story.

"I'm so sorry, sir." I start, because Lucy would want me to apologize for being rude.

"What can I help you with, son?" He asks, he doesn't look like he was sleeping, he doesn't even look tired. Just the opposite, he looks ready to work.

"Those necklaces you have there, the puzzle pieces." I specify "How much are they?"

The man walks back into the house and beckons me after. He goes to the case, his movements slow but precise. He holds the box out to me.

"These ones?" He asks.

"Yes." I nod a bit too frantically.

He smiles at me "you look like you need a gift to go along with a confession." he chuckles a little.

"Kind of but I'm always looking for something to give her." I admit a bit sheepishly. Lucy always did say I'm transparent.

"Was it your fault?" He asked walking behind a counter and bringing out a binder.

"I was a at a party with a few friends from work and she kissed me." I'm using him as practice. "It didn't mean anything."

"Did you kiss her back?" The man skims his finger along the page.

"Of course not, I love Lucy." He couldn't understand.

"Then why are you so concerned?" the man asked "is she the jealous type?"

"Not at all." I look at the simple necklaces beside him. she'll love themI hope I can afford them. "she's the most amazing, caring, loving and thoughtful person I've ever met."

"So, you're in love with her." the man says.

"Of course, I do." I laugh, because there's nothing else to it "and I somehow got lucky enough that she loves me too." I look at those necklaces. "I have to tell her about Lisana but… but I would have bought these on the spot for her even if I didn't."

"How come?" The man asks, watching me.

"Because she deserves so much, she could go out and she could marry some rich guy and they would have an amazing life together but… but she picked me." Lucy makes me feel like I'm in some cheesy chick flick. Not like I'm the guy either, like I'm the girl who's head over heels in love.

"And she never holds a grudge over anything." I laugh and shake my head "there was this one time, early on in our relationship, it was before it was even really official." I'm starting to babble, I must be tired "We were supposed to go out on a date and I completely spaced, I was writing and I just hit a writer's high." I can't believe she didn't break up with me on the spot. "and instead of blowing up my phone she took the subway to my house and she just came right in, she even stopped to pick up Chinese food and I was so into what I was doing, I didn't hear her come in or notice her sitting on my couch until almost midnight. She was just watching me and smiling and I thought she was waiting to yell at me, it was stupid, I should have given her more credit than that but, even then, I was so afraid of losing her and I knew I messed up but she was just smiling at me and she pointed to the box she set next to me and she said 'are you ready for our date?' and she turned on the TV and picked out a movie… she never said anything about it, she's never brought it up, she's never made me feel bad about it." I shake my head "she's never let another guy come onto her, she shuts them down immediately and here… I was so stupid, I thought Lisana was just being flirty because she was drunk and she wanted to mess with me, I mean Lisana knows how much I love Lucy." I shake my head, "I don't understand why she would do this"

The man watches me thoughtfully and I shake myself. "sorry, you didn't ask for my whole life's story."

He smiles and waves the apology off. "Now, the price…for you," the man looked at the sixty-five-dollar price. "Thirty-five." He smiles at me. "and I'll give you free engraving."

"I can get it engraved?" I ask.

He nods "I'll do it for you now, it'll take me about an hour." He passes me a pen and paper "keep it short, your names will go on the front and the message on the back."

"That's great." I feel a weight lift from my chest, not the one Lisana put there but the constant guilt I feel because I can't give her everything she deserves. "thank you so much."

"Feel free to wait on the couch, I'll be out as soon as I'm finished."

"Young man." The voice takes way too long to register in my head. The old man stands over me with intricately carved wooden box in his hands. it looks like it's the same box the necklaces sat in in the display but now it has both mine and Lucy's name carved into the top

"All finished." He smiles and holds the box out to me.

"Wow, that quick?" I sit up and stiffen a yawn, I can't tell if I'm seeing things or if that's really our names there.

"It's been almost two hours." He chuckles "you fell asleep."

"Are you serious?" I check my phone, "It's already four?" I shake myself again.

"Here you go, Mr. Dragneel." He presses the box into my hand. "Now go home and see her."

"Thank you." I tuck the box into my pocket. "thank you so much."

Lucy is curled up on the couch when I slip in through the door. She's curled up in our blanket in the dark. She's never been afraid of the dark, at least as far as I know. She loves it, she loves just about everything. Although, she never sleeps in our bed alone. I don't know if she's afraid or what, but she waits for me on the couch every night no matter how late I get home.

The box is sitting in my hand as I slide onto the couch beside her and wrap my arms around her, she doesn't move, she's out for the night. I want to give her the necklace now, I want to tell her about Lisana but that would be selfish. I don't want to be selfish. I want to be like Lucy, selfless and loving. I kiss her head. She doesn't move, she's so tired.

"I love you." I whisper holding her. It's enough just to hold her.


Dear Natsu,

Today was great with you. Sharing that half a donut and an ice cream. It was great, it was PERFECT and watching you tap away at your laptop late at night or early in the morning or when you wake up and you've had a spur of inspiration, it's all so perfect and I don't know how to say thank you.

Well, except for saying thank you.

Thank you Natsu, thank you so much.

Lucy