The Price of Humanity
Rated T, placed after the second reincarnation of the Avatar, (after Wan). The backstory as to why Lung is the way he is.
Lung
I stared out over the world of the humans, watching my people. I had held a great fascination in humans for a long time but I rarely interacted with one. I was watching a small air bending village, in particular one young man. I wasn't sure what had brought on such fascination but I could not tear myself away from watching him.
His name was Kwan, and he was nineteen years old. His hair was tightly curled so it stood above his head in a halo, his grey eyes always seemed to sparkle, although I did not understand why.
I watched him for two human years, as finally he left his village and mother, stating that he wished to find himself a wife. He packed his bags and left that day. I watched him, confused. This day his eyes did not sparkle, he seemed downcast. Strange behaviour from one who had asked his family for permission to seek a wife. I had seen many men in the village leave for a wife, returning days, weeks, or even months later with a girl on their arm. Those men always left with purpose, nervousness, but never such... dread.
I had become attached to this young man. Gently I sent a warm wind to surround him, encourage him. Whatever made him so sad I... I wanted his eyes to sparkle again.
The warm wind surrounded him as he left the village. He raised his curly head and looked up.
"The spirits are looking upon me." He murmured. I felt a strange tingling run through me. Wincing I rubbed my chest. Sprits didn't feel emotions as humans did, the emotions were greatly muted. It was why if a spirit chose to remain in the human world they had to remain as an animal, not a human. Animals too had muted emotions, although a great deal more powerful then a spirits.
Kwan continued his trek, but away from any village that I knew of. My curiosity won over. I carefully chose a form of a young man, a few years older than Kwan.
In less than a second I was standing before him. The young man jumped in shock, his eyes widening as he stared at me. He just looked at me for a time, eyes wide before finally stuttering out a question.
"W...who are you?" The words for my introduction were on my lips, but they failed.
"I'm Senge, who are you?" The lie burned in my mouth but my heart, strangely, did not regret it.
"Kwan," he replied, his eyes taking in my entire form. I had chosen the appearance of a young man about twenty-five human years old. My eyes were more blue than grey and I was bald, though I had no tattoo of a monk.
"A pleasure. Would you care to share your meal with a stranger?" I asked. Why was I speaking such? I had just wanted to ask him why he was traveling away from any village for miles, instead of towards another. Why would a man travel so far for merely a wife?
"Of course." I took a seat beside him, taking the bread. As I ate the thing turned to ash within my mouth, just as all food did for spirits. When we were finished we didn't move, instead, stepping into conversation.
"May I ask why you were wandering through here? You are of age where you would go to seek a wife but all the villages I know are not in this direction." I asked.
Kwan laughed bitterly.
"I told my family that I was looking for a wife but that is not what I am looking for." I tilted my head to the side, trying to understand the puzzle of the man who sat beside me.
"Then what do you seek? Glory? Power? Knowledge?" I questioned.
Kwan shook his head.
"No one would understand."
"Try me." I suggested, leaning back. I was an ancient deity after all, there was little I had not seen of this world.
"I... I do seek love but not the love of a woman." I blinked and sat up. I understood what Kwan was looking for now. There were few men in the generations of humanity that had lived up to this time who looked for male partners. I did not understand it, but no spirit could. We were incapable of love.
"I see." I stated thoughtfully.
"Are you not angry? Will you not attack me?" Kwan barked, bristling to a stand.
I shook my head.
"And why would I attack you for loving a man? There is little wrong with it. You may not be able to produce a child but that is of little matter to me." I replied, standing and dusting myself off. It was annoying how the ground stuck to clothes. Sighing I took a great breath and blew my brother's element from my clothes.
"You are a strange monk." Kwan stated, shaking his head as he relaxed once again.
"Would you care if I joined you on your journey?" He asked me. I watched him carefully. I had to admit that I was fascinated by this young man.
Two more years passed, Kwan and I grew close. My curiosity for humans was only growing. I wanted to experience what they did, but to do so I would break one of the greatest laws in the spirit world.
I did it anyway.
The feelings! There was no words that could describe them. It was like living an entire lifetime as a husk and suddenly I was full. I could feel my own wind, my brother's earth, the cold bite of water. The beauty of moon and sun. It was all opened to me. Food no longer turned to dust in my mouth, but retained form and flavour! Flavour! Another experience that there was no description for.
Days after my change from spirit to human Kwan came to me at night.
" Senge, you have... been by my side for two years... why?" I sat up from under my blanket. Warmth, cold, every feeling, even pain was new and a joyous experience for me.
"I was curious and I... had strange feelings for you." I admitted. Even now, I had no descriptions for the feelings I felt for Kwan. Kwan's eyes grew wide.
"Please... Senge, tell me what you feel." So I told him. I told him how I worried when his eyes did not sparkle, how my body warmed at his touch, how I had secretly desired to stay at his side. Once I had become human I had been able to once again experience the feelings I had before and this time full strength.
"I desire the same." Kwan whispered, crawling under my blanket with me.
Kwan and I returned to his village that year.
There was no village to be found.
Instead what had been Kwan's homeland was destroyed beyond recognition. The wail of pain that tore through my lover's throat seemed to rip a hole straight through my all-too-human heart. In that moment I swore that only the air nation would continue on. The others were brutes, they deserved to be destroyed. Destroyed the same way they destroyed the sparkle in Kwan's eyes.
Another year passed, and I became the Emperor of the Tornado People, my group of soldiers and warriors who would destroy the other savage nations. Kwan was my consort and second-in-command. His eyes had become cold-steel but if I worked hard I could bring the sparkle back into his eyes... for just a moment.
I stood on a tall hill, my head lifted high. Pride pulsed through me, giving me strength and power, more than I had ever known. Below me an army of earth nation men stood shaking at my feet. I could flick my hand and they would be little more than dust. I smirked, using the sword was more fun, I would be able to feel their death coming.
"To me!" I shouted, my voice amplified so that everyone in the valley heard it ring, my heart raced, "to me! My empire!" Behind me my warriors screamed, already prepared for triumph. Energy and excitement rushed through me as we charged.
Battle was an expression of beauty I had never experienced before this year. To be living flesh and bone instead of spirit was thrilling and addicting. I never wished to stop breathing. Breath, what gave humans their life and without me, breath and life would cease. I was the sole reason life existed. My people were the only nation who deserved to live.
"Lung, this has gone far enough." I turned, a thrill of excitement coursed through me. The other elementals stood behind me, not one looked happy. Agni looked furious, her hair blazed brilliantly, heat radiated from her form. Tui and La even stopped their eternal love-hate relationship for one to send identical glares at me. I turned slightly. To my left was Prithvi. My brother was glaring at me, but there was also disappointment in his eyes. I couldn't bring myself to care. I had almost defeated one corner of the wheel.
"Come brother," he stated, his voice, gravely as a mountain, "you've had your fun, it is time to return to our world." My joy turned to anger as heat rushed over me, which only strengthened my determination. I would never return to the spirit world, never. Kwan was my world now.
"No. Join me," I persuaded, "you do not know what it is like to live. To feel a heart, for food to taste, to breathe or feel the warmth of a fire! It is the most beautiful thing. Compared to the humans our lives are empty husks. I might as well have never felt anything before and you just want me to return to you? Just like that?" Both fear and anger were courting with me. Emotions, to feel emotions was the greatest blessing being human had brought me. Prithvi however looked wary.
"Brother, you do not know what you're saying. You can only be human for so long, once this form is dead that will be the end."
"Not if I become like Ravaa!" I cried excitedly, "Just think spirits and humans living as one!" I did not care if I took over another human, Kwan and I would stay together. I would find some way to keep him immortal. He would live with me, and maybe as the years passed I could restore the sparkle in his eyes.
"He's gone insane," La muttered, "humans cannot live with spirits inside them." She turned to me, black eyes drawing all light to them, "And Raavaa was different Lung, she had no choice. If it were to happen again she would not have been so foolish." My fear had lost overpowering, infuriating anger was all I had left and I embraced the emotion letting it guide my body, take control of my being.
"I'll show you, I'll show you all!" I turned, to come face to face with a man. He was in his fifties and covered in wrinkles. My anger was still to great to be replaced by fear, even though I knew him. This man was the one whom Raavaa had joined, this man was the one called the avatar.
The next thing I knew I was back in the spirit world.
"NO!" I screamed, agony tearing through me. No, no no... no. My agony was fading away but I held onto it for dear life. Determined I threw myself at the earth, staring down at it. I could not pass into it, it was a solid wall between myself and the world.
I could only watch as my people were thrown backwards, destroyed by the earth nation filth. I could only watch as Kwan wailed over my body before he took his own life.
No matter what I would never forgive the others, no matter what I would never regret my choices. I would never regret the life I had lived with Kwan, and his sparkling grey eyes.
