Chapter 47.
Thanks for being patient. I'm glad you're all enjoying the slow build between Daniela and Lip.
Disclaimer: I do not own Shameless.
Daniela never thought a time would come in her life where she would actually miss Mandy Milkovich. Of course, this mindset had shifted somewhat once they actually became friends but now that she had left for the remainder of the Summer, Daniela found herself bored during her shifts at the diner.
Making a mental note to give the couple a call to see how things were going, she weaved through the tables to where a group of people had just left. She got to work piling up the plates and scraping the leftovers off onto one before gathering all of the cutlery and lifting it into her sturdy grip.
As she began to head back into the kitchen, Daniela noticed a couple taking a seat at a table up ahead. She paid them no attention at first until she saw the guy turn his head slightly towards her and causing her to freeze. As a result of her shock, a knife clattered to the ground right beside the foot of the person.
With a quiet groan of annoyance, Daniela squatted down to grab the utensil when she saw a hand grab it for her instead. She lifted her eyes to see Chris staring back at her. She noticed the split-second of unfamiliarity before it clicked in his mind and his face shifted from one of relaxed kindness to one of someone who was now stuck in an awkward situation.
"Daniela," he said, just as surprised as her.
She cleared her throat and rose from her position.
"Chris. Hey."
Chris' eyes followed her movement as he adjusted his torso to face her better. "I forgot that you worked here."
Daniela understood that if he did, he wouldn't have picked this particular diner to eat at. Instead of showing this, she simply smiled back at him. Chris, remembering his companion, turned and gestured to her.
"Oh, Jen this is Daniela," he introduced though, from her point of view, she was sure he really didn't want to. "Daniela this is Jen. My girlfriend." The last word was spoken somewhat hesitantly.
Daniela's brow raised as it fell quiet between them for a moment. Both her and Chris could feel the awkward tension brewing around them. She brushed it off quickly and offered Jen a kind smile.
"Nice to meet you."
"It's our first time here," said Jen, flashing her pearly teeth. Either she hadn't picked up on the other two being weird or she simply didn't care. "What would you suggest?"
"Uh…" Daniela adjusted the plates in her hand. "Benny makes a mean waffle."
Her timid suggestion caused the couple to laugh but Chris' was a bit more forced.
"Good to know," grinned Jen. "We'll make sure to order some."
"Great! I, uh - I better take care of these but it was nice meeting you." Daniela's eyes traveled to her companion. "Chris," she nodded before quickly turning on her heel and walking towards the kitchen.
As she walked away, she released a long breath. Now she really wished Mandy was there with her.
.
For the rest of her shift, Daniela had to deal with watching the couple all over each other. At first, she hadn't even noticed her irritation until she slammed a few plates down beside the dishwasher causing bubbles and water to go everywhere. She had cursed and apologized profusely to the dish-washer while helping them clean up.
During a moment where service had slowed down, Daniela had peered out from the pass of the kitchen to survey the pair sitting beside the window and slowly she began to notice the little bubble of irritation develop inside of her. She didn't even know why it got to her or why she cared considering she had been the one who didn't want to over-complicate things.
But as she looked out at them, Daniela began to feel a tinge of sadness at the thought that she could've been in Jen's position if she had only been able to forget about Lip. He was one of the reasons she had kept Chris at a distance in the first place. She thought she had been doing both of them a favor by calling it quits but now she wasn't so sure.
While she and Lip had been rekindling their friendship, it sometimes felt like that was all it was going to be. Daniela knew that he was with Amanda and she also knew the vast benefits that came with dating her. She was well-off, smart, attractive and could be just as sly as him when she wanted to.
For Daniela, it made breaking up with Chris pointless in hindsight considering that she wasn't sure much was going to come of her relationship with Lip. It seemed like she couldn't escape couples. Lip had Amanda, Simon had Mandy, Ian had Mickey- hell, Jakob even had Katherine. And that left Daniela all alone. She didn't have a companion to talk to and share those special moments with. She had completely tossed away her last opportunity and now she was paying for it by having their happiness thrown back into her face.
Daniela was completely and utterly alone.
It was a sobering thought that lingered over her head like a dark cloud for the remainder of her shift and as she burst free of the diner an hour later, she tried to not let the emotion show.
"Daniela, wait up!" At the sound of someone calling out to her, she frowned and rotated to see jogging towards her. Even more confused, she stood and waited for him to reach her.
"What's up?" She asked before looking over his shoulder for Jen but she wasn't there.
"Uh, I just wanted to check up on you," answered Chris, his eyes turning serious. "You know, to see if you're okay."
Daniela narrowed her eyes in question whilst wondering if it had really been that obvious. "Why wouldn't I be?"
Chris rubbed a hand over the back of his neck and checked the diner window for his girlfriend.
"Look, I really did forget that you worked here. And Jen, she doesn't know anything about you."
"Yeah, obviously. I doubt she would've been so nice if she did."
"Right," he nodded in agreement. "But really, how are you doing?"
"I'm great," said Daniela, shrugging casually.
"Are you sure? Because I know how awkward that must've been for you-"
"Chris," she cut him off. "No offense but I really couldn't care less. From the looks of it, Jen is a really nice girl. I'm happy for you."
Chris' shoulders sagged in silent relief as a small grin worked its way onto his face. "Thanks. I guess I just didn't want you to think I brought her here on purpose."
"I didn't," shrugged Daniela, ignoring how it hadn't made it hurt less. "But thanks for thinking of me."
At the sound of the bell ringing above the door, Daniela glanced over his shoulder to see Jen emerge from the diner. She came to a stop beside Chris who wasted no time wrapping an arm around her. The sight of it up close caused Daniela's expression to dampen.
"You were so right, the waffles were amazing!" Gushed Jen, totally oblivious. "Babe, we have to come back here sometime."
Chris' eyes lingered on Daniela for a second, no doubt noticing her reaction before he smiled at his girlfriend. "Yeah, sure."
Eager to wrap up the conversation and ditch, Daniela smiled at the two of them and clapped her hands together. "Well, I better get going but I'm glad you liked it."
"Thanks again for the recommendation," smiled Jen as she rested her hand on Chris' chest.
"No worries." Daniela backed away slowly. "I'll see you around campus," she said to Chris who just nodded in response.
Turning, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and began walking towards the station.
/
Instead of heading straight home like she had originally intended to, Daniela made a last minute detour to Mickey's house. With Ian there, she knew she would have someone that she could unload all of her thoughts onto.
She entered without knocking; her presence was becoming shockingly more common now that Ian resided there. As she walked into the living room, her brow raised at the sight of the cleaned house. It was barely recognizable.
Hearing footsteps, Ian poked his head around the archway of the kitchen to see her standing there.
"El," he greeted warmly as he continued to scrub the stovetop. "You just get off work?"
"Yeah." Daniela's voice was monotone as she collapsed on the sofa like a sack of potatoes.
Noticing this, Ian fixed her with a look of scrutiny and went to the fridge to retrieve a beer. With it in hand, he walked over to the coffee table in front of her and passed it off.
"Penny for your thoughts," he encouraged, taking a seat.
Daniela shook her head and cracked the drink open before taking a long swig of it.
"Chris came into the diner today with his girlfriend."
Ian frowned in confusion. "Who?"
"Oh shit." Her eye shut at the reminder that he probably didn't remember him. "Okay, so you know when you stayed with me for a bit and there was that guy who came to drop off a sweater?" She paused long enough for Ian to nod. "Well, we sort of had this friends-with-benefits thing going until it all got complicated. And then before things got too deep, we - or I - ended things because I realized I was still in love with Lip, and then-"
"You're still in love with Lip?"
Daniela froze mid-sentence, her mind quickly catching her slip.
"Uh..." she stuttered whilst trying to backtrack. "I said I was. I was in love with Lip. Past tense."
Ian simply gave her a look that indicated his clear disbelief. Choosing to ignore him as well as the sudden knot in her stomach, Daniela pushed on.
"Anyway! Seeing him again today there with his girlfriend all happy and everything…I don't know. I know that I don't get to be jealous - and I'm not. I think it's more that I'm upset, you know? Because I could've had that but I turned it down because I suck at letting things go and because I knew that, unless I magically got over my feelings for Lip, I would never be able to have a proper relationship."
Ian rubbed his hands together slowly as he listened to her. It was silent for a long moment before he spoke. "So where are you at now with Lip?"
Daniela wiped a tired hand across her face and shook her head. "Uh, we're friendly, I guess?" She let out a groan at the thought that this whole spiel was unwanted. "Ugh, who am I kidding? You probably don't even wanna hear this, I'm sorry. I uh, I'm just gonna go home."
She stood from the sofa and shuffled a little on her feet as she tried to collect her thoughts. She shook her head once again.
"Sorry. I'll message you later." Bending down, Daniela pressed a kiss to her friend's cheek before heading out the door. Ian barely had any time to register her hasty departure and was left sighing at the sound of her leaving.
/
For the remainder of the night, Daniela was determined to forget about her flub to Ian by staying inside and curling up in front of the television.
She flicked through the channels, waiting for the movie special to come on. In her lap sat a bowl of semi-burnt popcorn while a box of half-eaten milk duds rested against her thigh. She shoved a handful of the popcorn into her mouth and groaned quietly at the lack of entertainment being played.
As she went for another handful, a knock at the door caused her to pause. Daniela frowned. She wasn't expecting anyone.
With a low grunt of effort, she pushed herself off of the sofa and walked to open the door. When she did, her brow raised at the sight of Lip.
"Hey," he greeted.
"Hey," she responded, still confused.
"Is your brother here?"
Daniela shook her head and stepped out onto the porch. "No, he went out on a date with his girlfriend."
"Right," Lip nodded before glancing around. "Well, did you want to maybe hang out? I stole a jar of Frank's homemade beer if you're interested."
Holding it up, Lip showed her the mason jar filled with the brown liquid. Daniela raised a brow at it. She had no idea that Frank had concocted his own brew. She also had no idea what had caused Lip to come over.
Nevertheless, she caved. "Yeah, sure," she agreed after a long moment. "Not here though."
Lip shrugged his shoulders. "Alright."
Daniela quickly headed back inside to find some shoes. Before leaving, she sub-consciously paused in front of the mirror to check her appearance. Satisfied, she grabbed her keys and headed out to where Lip was stood waiting for her at the fence.
"Any idea where you wanna go?" He asked once they began walking.
Unsure, Daniela shrugged. "Wherever. I don't mind."
/
Eventually, they winded up at the park where they both sat on top of the jungle gym. The sun had already gone down by the time they got there but the street lights illuminated their surroundings enough.
Their legs hung over the side of the tower as Lip twisted the lid off of the mason jar. Offering it out, Daniela leaned forward to sniff it. Immediately, her nose crinkled.
"God, that's potent."
"You first," said Lip, keeping the jar in front of her.
"And you're sure this is safe for human consumption?" She questioned cautiously as he handed it over.
"Yeah, it should be fine," shrugged Lip, grinning slightly.
Daniela kept her eyes locked on his for a second before giving in and taking a drink. As soon as it hit her tongue, she balked.
"Jesus, this tastes like lighter fluid," she coughed before going back in for another gulp. She then passed it to Lip who took a small sip at first.
His teeth clenched at the strength of it.
"Holy shit," he laughed. "That's bad stuff."
"Yeah, but it's kind of bad to the point where you want more," commented Daniela, already reaching for it again.
For the next hour, the jar was traded between the two of them as they engaged in light-hearted conversation. It hadn't taken very long for the effects of the alcohol to kick in with the beer being extremely powerful. By the time they reached the halfway point, the tension in Daniela's shoulders had relaxed and her legs swayed with the cool breeze over the edge of the tower.
Leaning her head back, she stared up at the stars. She felt weightless in that moment as she marveled up at the sky. Beside her, Lip observed the childlike smile on her face and felt his own begin to sprout.
Daniela released a content sigh.
"God, I haven't felt this buzzed since after my mom died."
Lip frowned slightly. "Really?"
It was obvious that the alcohol had loosened her up to to the point that she had no problem speaking freely.
"Yeah, it got a little rough there for a bit so I had stopped or at least tried to limit myself," she explained causing Lip to eye her differently. He hadn't even suspected. Then again, she had done a good job of keeping him away. His eyes dropped at the reminder.
"So what did Ian tell you?" She asked after a brief silence.
Lip's spine straightened as he feigned innocence "What do you mean?"
Daniela rolled her eyes, her head swaying to the side to see him. "Oh, come on, Lip. I know that's why you're doing all of this."
At the sound of her words beginning to slur, Lip grinned despite himself. "How do you know I didn't want to just hang out with you?"
"True," she nodded, waving a finger. "But considering I had a mini-rant to Ian today I'm guessing that's the real reason."
Lip relented and shrugged his shoulders. "He was just worried about you. He said that something upset you today."
Daniela bit the inside of the cheek as she met his concerned stare.
"And he thought you could help?" At his silence, she snorted. "Right. Did he even tell you the reason?"
"He mentioned a few things," said Lip, tilting his head. "Mainly that your ex showed up at work with his new girlfriend."
Daniela was quiet as she chewed on the skin of her cheek. She could feel the nerves building in her stomach at the thought that Ian may have mentioned some other things too.
Wiping a strand of hair out of her eyes, she quirked an eyebrow. "Is that all?"
Lip's eyes stay glued to hers for a few seconds as they sat there in silence. Daniela feared the worst as he stared back at her, and as the silence stretched on, the nerves intensified.
"Yeah," nodded Lip finally. "That was it."
Daniela's eyes closed in relief as she leaned her head forward into her hands.
"What even happened between you and that Chris guy?" Frowned Lip, his eyes remaining on her.
She blew out a long breath and shook her head. "I wasn't even sure half of the time. At first, it was just sex. But then it started changing and getting all complicated, and it terrified me."
Lip's brow creased. "Why?"
"Because of you," she admitted bluntly before pausing and tilting her head in contradiction. "Not to put all of the blame on you though. Admittedly, it was a lot of me too." Her eyes rested on her hands as her face became more serious. "The worst part about it all is that I don't even get to be mad, you know? Because I was the one who ended things. I was the one who pushed him away."
Daniela felt her voice growing thick with emotion as she picked at the fabric of her shorts.
"I was the one who didn't want to accept the fact that there was a guy - a really, really great guy - who cared about me and actually wanted to get to know me better. But instead, I just turned him away. And now I'm all alon-"
Her voice caught on the last word as she felt the tears begin to fall.
"I'm all alone, and it's all my fault," said Daniela; her head falling into her hands while her shoulders shook.
Lip watched with sad eyes as she continued to cry. He didn't think the question would elicit that type of response. Daniela didn't either. He could hear her beginning to hiccup and sighed.
Daniela was wiping at her cheeks when she felt an arm wrap around her.
"You're not alone," he told her, his voice hardening. "You have your family, you have Ian, and you have me." Lip pulled her closer to his side so that she could rest her head against his shoulder. He pressed a kiss to it before softly claiming, "Even if you don't want me."
Instead of calming her like he had hoped it would, a fresh wave of tears began leaving Lip to just sit there and continue comforting her. Turning, he rested his chin on her head and held her tightly.
"I thought college would be my fresh start," said Daniela, once she got herself under a bit of control. Her voice was barely audible. "I thought that getting some separation from everything would be good for me, but instead I feel even more lost. But being back here - being back home, it's reminded me of everything I've been missing."
"Like this," she said, lifting an arm to gesture at their surroundings. "These moments where things seem so simple. Before everything became so fucked up."
"I know what you mean," agreed Lip, his voice equally soft.
Slowly, Daniela raised her head from his chest to meet his eyes. Her breathing stilled when Lip reached out to brush the remaining tears away. His thumb moved along her skin and came to a stop at the end of the cheekbone but instead of dropping it, he let it linger.
Daniela, feeling a sudden emergence of courage and seeing that Lip shared a similar thought, let her eyes fall to his mouth.
With slight hesitation, Daniela leaned in. He met her halfway as their lips brushed against each other tentatively.
She pulled back slightly, unsure if it was a spur of the moment thing or something that Lip also wanted. When she saw no objection, she didn't hesitate to kiss him again.
Happiness, excitement, and desire coursed through Daniela as the kiss built. Her hands wound around his neck and tangled themselves in his hair as Lip found one of his own pulling on her waist.
Lifting one leg, Daniela rotated so that she could fully face him. She could feel her heart racing under his touch as well as a fulfillment that maybe this is what she had been missing. Lip seemed to be thinking the same, judging by the way his hands were trying to pull her closer to deepen the kiss.
When the need for air became too strong, the pulled apart. Daniela, fully intent on continuing, leaned back in but stopped at the look on Lip's face.
"What is it?" She asked, feeling dread well up in her chest. "What's wrong?"
Lip's jaw clenched before he raised his eyes to meet her. "I'm going to Miami."
Daniela felt like she had been punched in the gut.
"Oh."
"Amanda's still been going on about me visiting her and I figured with work being so shitty, now would be the best time to go."
"It's fine. You don't need to explain yourself," she said, rotating back to her original position.
Her hands balled themselves up in her lap, giving her something to stare at. Around them, the wind picked up and traveled through her hair but she made no effort to fix it. Instead, she let it fall around her.
Lip heaved a sigh.
"Dani-"
"I think I should probably head home," she said, effectively cutting him off as her hardened eyes rose to meet his. "It's getting late."
Lip agreed despite himself. He stood up first and reached for the almost-empty mason jar as Daniela began to get up too. She staggered slightly causing him to help her.
"I'm fine," she brushed him off.
Lip's hand fell back to his side and his mouth pinched at seeing her close herself off again. The effects of the alcohol were still present, however, and meant that, as they climbed down from the tower of the jungle gym, Daniela had no option but to accept the help of his steadier hands.
The walk back was quiet and tense - at least on Daniela's part. She didn't look in his direction once, not even when he offered her the remaining beer. Instead, she kept her arms wrapped around herself.
Beside her, Lip was far more relaxed and as they walked, he continued to throw sideways glances at her just to monitor her emotions. He could see that she was embarrassed as well as guilty. He didn't want her to feel that way, but he didn't know how to help it.
He debated whether to say something - anything - to try and ease her worries but, as they came to a stop outside of his house, Daniela beat him to it.
"I'm sorry," she apologized, finally making eye contact. "I shouldn't have done that. It was the first time in a while that I've drunk so I guess things kind of slipped my mind for a second there."
Lip frowned lightly. "You don't need to apologize."
"You think we could maybe forget that it happened?" She hoped; her hands clenched together. "It's just that I don't want it to ruin this."
"Sure," agreed Lip, watching her intently. "No problem."
Relief flooded her face as she pursed her lips. "Well, thanks for tonight. It felt good just hanging out with you again - you know - before I messed it up."
"It was nothing," said Lip.
Daniela nodded, not sure which part he was talking about. "Right, well. Enjoy Miami."
Lip looked like he wanted to add something else but decided against it. "Thanks."
With one last nod, she turned and walked away. Her eyes closed as she pinched the bridge of her nose. What had started off as a promising night ended with her only feeling guilt, regret, and sadness.
Oops…thoughts?
Also, what do you think of season 8 so far?
Special thanks to 13teen, RHatch89, Naruhina1519, angelicedg, Maddprincess, littlerosebudbroke, RomanticBlondie for reviewing!
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