- How are you? - Cas asked, sliding in the seat in front of Dean, placing a plate with hot baked potatoes.
Dean just shrugged, starting to eat, noting how much better Cas have got on cooking.
Cas was watching him, Dean could feel it without even looking up.
He tried to force all his concentration on his potatoes.
Cas let him eat, simply sitting there in silence, never taking his eyes off of Dean.
But even so, he was a big comfort to Dean.
Dean would probably have drank at least half the bottle by now if Cas wouldn't have been there.
Way too soon Dean ran out of potatoes, having no other choice than to finally look up at Cas.
He met Cas's beautifully blue eyes, feeling a sudden urge to cry.
In a matter of seconds Cas was there, by his side, pulling Dean in, holding him close.
Dean let out a huff of shaky breath, bidding his face against Cas' neck, tears breaking free.
It shouldn't be anything new for Dean, he should be used to the feel of loss by now but still, even after all these years, the loss was gripping Dean tight and shaking him to the core.
Cas holds him, running his fingers softly through Dean's hair, soothing him, letting Dean cry out all the tears.
After ten minutes, Dean slowly lifted his head, taking a tissue Cas offered him and blew his nose.
- Any better? - Cas was still holding one arm protectively around Dean.
Dean shrugged, leaning against Cas, feeling way too tired all of a sudden.
Cas fell silent once again, running his fingers softly through Dean's hair, grounding him and lulling him to the restless sleep.
Some may say that it wasn't Dean's fault but Cas wasn't one of them, he knew that such bullshit would only darken Dean's mood.
Maybe that was one of the reasons why Dean has let Cas stay with him instead of Sam, Cas just knew what Dean needed without saying, making it easy to take care of him.
And when Dean startled up from his sleep, Cas was still there, still holding Dean, his blue eyes shining in the shadowed room.
Dean sighed, shuffling even closer to him, tilting his face upwards in a silent plea.
Without saying, Cas leaned down, kissing Dean softly.
Nothing was good, Dean was still in a dark place, his mind and soul troubled but for that moment everything was good enough, he could get lost in the taste of Cas' lips, letting himself feel safe.
