A/N: Happy Sweetest Day Richonners! Here's a little treat for you. This chapter sees more development between Rick and Michonne. We also get a couple of flashbacks and Rick's angry side makes another appearance. I hope you're enjoying this slow burn, as the characters and their motivations take shape.

Also, there was mention of the cover art for this fic. That is courtesy of msdoomandgloom. I do not own it! It wasn't made specifically for this story. I just love her work. You can find her on Tumblr and Twitter.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter! Please drop a review! Be well!


Chapter 4: This Sorrowful Life

Six years ago…

Rick and his partner Alden brought the cruiser to a stop on the side of Holland Road. It was dark, but they could see the light of a bonfire off in the field near old man Wilson's barn. The old man had called about a group of teenagers on his property who were "up to no good."

They exited their vehicle, walking past a rusty van which they assumed the teens had used for transportation. The smell of smoke mixed with the scent of marijuana as they made their way through the tall grass. Heavy metal music invaded their ears, as they got closer. A group of five teens, two girls and three boys, huddled around the fire, drinking and smoking. The kids immediately froze when they saw the two deputies, looks of horror on their faces.

"Just what the hell are you all doin' out here?" Alden asked sternly, lowering his hands to his hips.

"Not…nothin' officer. We were just talkin," A pimply faced boy with long dark hair answered.

"This is private property. Y'all got no business being out here," Rick added. "And I'm sure none of you are old enough to be drinking…not to mention smoking weed. You do know it's illegal right?"

The teens started gathering their things, promising to go straight home.

"Nope, come on. We're taking y'all to the station," Alden interjected. "You two in the cruiser with me," he said pointing to two of the boys. "Deputy Grimes will drive the girls and Casanova over here in the van we saw parked on the road."


They drove to the station where each teen's parents were called to pick them up. The deputies decided to let the kids off with a warning, which saved them a ton of paperwork.

Rick sat at his desk, eyeing the blonde young man who was the only one left to be picked up. The young man was clearly intimidated, in fact he looked downright terrified as Rick stared at him coldly.

A few minutes passed and a man in his forties walked in and stopped at the front desk. Rick recognized him as the young man's father. He'd seen them around town several times.

"Tim," the man said, looking over to his son. "What they hell were you doing drinking and smoking? You know better than that. Your mother is worried sick!"

"Dad, I wasn't doing any of that. I was just out there listening to music. I swear."

"You shouldn't have been out there at all! Let's go," he growled, ushering the young man to the door.

"Make sure you get control of your boy," Rick shouted.

The man looked back at him. "Will do, deputy."


Later that night, Rick came home to find Melanie in bed. He stood in the doorway of their bedroom and watched her for a moment. She had lost so much weight in the last few months, her long ginger tresses were replaced with a silk head scarf, which she wore at all times.

"Rick," she moaned quietly.

"Yeah, I'm here," he said, lying down next to her on the bed. He wrapped her in his arms and kissed her gaunt cheek. "Did K-bear give you any trouble tonight?"

She smiled weakly. "No, she was a little angel. She went down a couple of hours ago after mom left. Sorry, I must have fallen asleep. I was trying to wait up for you."

He looked into her green eyes. His missed the brightness of them. They were the first thing he noticed when he met her. Now they were dull and full of weariness. She was tired and he knew it. He didn't want to face it, but he knew…it was time to let her go.

He rubbed her cheek with his thumb, and she sighed at the feeling. "Sweetie, you didn't have to wait up. You need your rest." He kissed her gently on the tip of her nose.

She grabbed his hand and held it close to her heart. "Rick, I don't want to sleep away the time I have with you. I want to savor every moment, because soon…I won't be here."

He shut his eyes, trying to will away her words…wishing this were all some nightmare he would wake up from at any moment, but he knew she was right. "I don't want to lose you, Mel," he said, his voice shaky from the crushing sadness of his reality. "What am I gonna do without you? What will Kaley do without her mother?"

"You're gonna survive, that's what you're gonna do. The Rick Grimes I know, and love is a survivor…and you're gonna make sure our baby girl has the best life." She wiped at the tears now streaming down her face. "Make sure she knows me Rick…and keep her safe…no matter what. I'll live on through her, so you'll always have a piece of me."

He sobbed, burying his face into the crook of her neck. "I promise, Mel. I promise I'll keep her safe and make sure she knows how much her mama loved her," he cried.

He pulled back and looked into her eyes. "I don't want you to worry anymore. You can let go, baby. Kaley and I will be okay."

He held her for the rest of the night, not wanting to squander any of the precious time they had left.


Present day…

Rick lowered the hood of the car and wiped the sweat from his brow with a towel he kept in his back pocket. He was glad to be done for the day. He wanted to go home, shower and hit the sack.

The past couple of weeks had been much of the same for him, work at the shop, come home and eat, and have a few drinks. However, there were a couple of changes. His time spent spying on Tim had dwindled a bit, as he kept busy with work. He'd also been spending a little more time with his beautiful neighbor. They hadn't gone anywhere, just sat on her porch, drank coffee and talked, but he liked it. He felt a little calmer when he was around her…a little lighter.

Mr. Nothing's got a lot
He's got a lot to say
He's good at being what he's not
Gives nothing away

He walked inside the break room and washed his hands, eager to get off the grease and motor oil that seemed to be constantly stuck to them these days. He didn't notice Daryl walking up behind him.

"Aye," Daryl snapped, harshly grabbing Rick's shoulder. "I'm glad I caught cha'. I been meanin' to talk to ya' about that shit with my brother."

Rick groaned. He had managed to steer clear of Daryl since that night at the bar. He was grateful to Glenn for putting them on different shifts.

"What about it?" Rick retorted, jerking from Daryl's grip.

"That wasn't called for man…especially not over some chick you barely know. You broke his damn nose!"

Rick scoffed and shook his head. "He's lucky I didn't break his fuckin' neck."

"Look man, you cain't just come in town and start shit with people, a'ight. People 'round here don't take too kindly to outsiders gettin' outta line."

"I don't really give a fuck what the people in this town take kindly to. If your shitbag brother has a problem, he knows where to find me," Rick stated, invading Daryl's personal space.

Glenn walked in to find the two men staring each other down. "Guys what's going on?"

"I was just telling Daryl here what a piece of shit his lowlife brother is," Rick answered, not taking his eyes off Daryl.

"Man, come on. I need y'all to be able to work together. Just let it go okay," Glenn pleaded.

"I can work with him just fine, as long as he knows that his brother is a racist, drug dealing piece of shit. You're lucky I don't call the cops right now."

"What the hell are you talkin' about man?" Daryl grunted. "You need to mind your own damn business. Whatever Merle may or may not be, he's my brother. He took care of me when my daddy used to beat my ass black and blue! You have no fuckin' idea, man."

Rick knew he had hit a nerve with Daryl, but he didn't care. The rage he felt when he saw Merle grab Michonne's ass was enough for him to put him a hospital bed. He'd showed the redneck mercy by hitting him only one time. Daryl should be grateful. Instead he continued with his rant.

"Why should we trust a thing you say anyway, Rick? We don't know you. I sure as hell don't know you. All I know is that you say you were a cop and you quit because you needed a change. I ain't buyin' it man. You're shady as hell."

It was Rick's turn to be triggered. He didn't want anyone questioning his story about why he moved to Tannon Falls. Daryl and Merle were beginning to become a problem, one he hadn't planned on dealing with.

Rick grabbed his jacket off the hook. "I'm done with this conversation. I'll see you later Glenn."

With that, he stormed out the shop.

He takes his chance with what he's got
It's too late now to stop


Michonne rummaged through her closet trying to find something to wear. She was due at the church in an hour. She hadn't gotten around to putting away all of her clothes and what she had managed to sort through still needed to be organized. Her formal clothing was still mixed in with her casual outfits.

She pushed a few dresses aside, looking for her fuchsia wide-legged jumpsuit. It was comfortable but would still make a good first impression.

She suddenly stopped and trained her eyes on the black dress hanging before her. As she examined it, her thoughts drifted to the last time she had worn it.

A year and a half earlier…

Michonne watched as various friends and family took roses from atop the tiny casket. All the flowers were red, Kyle's favorite color. She couldn't bring herself to grab any of them. They would eventually shrivel up and die anyway. She lowered her Ray Bans over her eyes and turned to make her way back to the limo. Watching her baby be lowered into the ground was bound to break her. Ed grabbed her hand to accompany her and she instantly pulled away.

They both decided not to attend the repast at their family church. Neither had the strength or will to put on more fake smiles or hold meaningless conversation with anyone. They didn't even speak to each other on the ride home.

Once they arrived, Michonne walked straight up the stairs, entered the bedroom, and shut the door. She couldn't wait to rip off the black dress. She never cared for black, it was void of color, emotion, and life. She loved red like her baby boy. As a matter of fact, she loved all bright colors. Bright colors exuded happiness and vibrancy. She undressed as Ed came into the room.

"So, you're not speaking to me?" He asked, placing his hands on his hips.

She didn't look at him, instead proceeding to strip down to her bra and panties. "I have nothing to say to you," she responded flatly.

"Michonne," he sighed. "How long are we going to do this? We should be helping each other get through everything, not giving each other the silent treatment. Little man wouldn't want that."

She stopped and stared into his deep brown eyes, anger contorting her face. "Don't you dare! I don't know what Kyle would want because he isn't here."

"I know that! I also know that he would want us to work through this."

"Ed, don't use Kyle to try and hold on to me. You chose to betray your family and look what happened! If I wasn't out trying to find out what the hell you were doing with some slut, I would have been at home with Kyle…he would still be here! So, go fuck yourself! I don't want to ever talk to you again!" she screamed, throwing one of her stilettos at him.

He effectively dodged it, and moved closer to her, grabbing her arm. "It's not my fault you wanted to play detective instead of having your ass at home!"

"Fuck you!" she snapped, trying to jerk away from his strong grip. "Let me go!"

He refused her command. "Michonne, baby…I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm sorry for everything I've done, I'm sorry our son is gone."

They both were crying now. He placed his forehead against hers. "Just tell me what I need to do. Tell me how I can make it right. I'll do anything."

He lightly ran his hands along her back and unhooked her bra as he kissed her lips. To his surprise, she didn't pull away.


Present day…

Michonne entered the recreation room of the church. The space was large with a few game tables, a huge flatscreen television and chairs set up on one side and a separate section with long tables, easels, and art supplies. Tim stood there with a group of six teenagers.

She smiled and waved at him as she walked over to join the group. The younger man's eyes lit up when he saw her.

"Everyone, this is Michonne. Michonne, this is the group…Avon, Tameka, Deandre, Caleb, Tiffany, and Enid, he said pointing to each of them.

"Hi guys, I'm happy to be here working with you today," she beamed. "Shall we get started?"


A couple of hours later and the lesson was over. She thoroughly enjoyed her afternoon with the kids. They were eager to learn and participate, but Tameka reminded Michonne of her younger self, a free thinker who wasn't interested in fitting into a box. The young girl's appearance even resembled Michonne, with her dark skin and long flowing braids, accentuated with gold hair jewelry. Michonne smiled to herself, thinking about her own teenage years.

Tim's voice brought her out of her thoughts, as they sat at a table in Al's Eatery, a local restaurant near his job.

"Thanks so much for coming, Michonne. The kids really enjoyed it."

"Thanks for inviting me. I enjoyed it too, and thanks for lunch," she said, taking a bite of her turkey sandwich.

"Aww, it's nothin'. We have to compensate you somehow," he joked.

She looked into his hazel eyes. She determined he was quite attractive, tall and fit with wavy blonde hair. Perhaps if he were older, she would have reciprocated his flirting and see where it went, but she was about ten years his senior and it didn't feel right. Besides, she was quite taken with the ruggedly handsome guy next door. In fact, she hadn't been able to get him off her mind.

"I don't need compensation. I love creating things and I enjoy working with young people, so it's a win-win," she smiled.

Tim took a sip of his coke. "I would love to see some of your artwork. Is your gallery online?"

"Yeah, I'll text you the details. My friend and partner Aaron runs the business. I moved to this area because I needed to get away from Atlanta, but I still keep my eye on things."

"Why did you decide on Tannon Falls? It's so different from the city?"

Michonne sighed and folded her arms in her lap. "I had trouble in my personal life, it became too much for me. I've spent over a year trying to heal from it. I visited Tannon Falls when I was younger. My aunt lived here, and I loved it. I thought it would be a good place to find peace."

Tim reflected over her words. "I moved to Savannah from another small town, looking to get away as well. I ran into some trouble a few years ago…and I went to prison," he said, lowering his gaze to his lap.

Michonne was surprised by his confession. He didn't seem like the type to land in trouble with the law. She wasn't sure how to respond, so she simply said, "Oh…do you mind if I ask what you did?"

He finally looked at her. "Of course not. I brought it up," he shrugged. "I caused an accident that killed a little girl. It was the worst day of my life and every day…I wish I could take it back."

Michonne felt sorry for him, seeing the solemn look in his eyes. "Oh, wow. That's a heavy cross to bear."

He nodded, "I've been trying to put my life back together. Being here with my aunt and uncle helps. I like my job and I like working with the kids at the church. I even host a group teaching about the dangers of being distracted while driving."

She lightly tapped the hand he had laid across the table. "It takes a lot to pull yourself out of despair, especially when you're carrying guilt. It's admirable what you're doing. Not everyone gets a second chance in life."

He squeezed her hand, happy to have another person to speak with about his guilt. He hardly knew Michonne, but he was grateful she walked into the store that day. Talking to her was comforting and he needed that right now.

"I appreciate that, Michonne." He pulled his hand away and went back to eating his meal. "So, I would love to show you some of my sketches and get your professional opinion."

"I'd be happy to look at them," she grinned. "Great, I'll bring some the next time you come to the church," he beamed.

"Sounds good. Are you heading to work after this?" she asked. "Yep, no rest for the wicked," he grinned.

She smiled at his humor. "Ain't that the truth."

You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin'
You give and you take and take what you got


Rick sat in his truck outside of Walker's Hardware. He'd been sitting there for an hour, waiting to get a glimpse of Tim. Rick was familiar with his schedule and knew he'd be working this evening.

He pulled out his buzzing phone and saw a text from Shane. He groaned and put it back in his pocket. He would call his brother back later. He was still upset from his confrontation with Daryl and wasn't in the mood to hear Shane telling him how he was handling everything all wrong. He knew there was a lot of truth to that statement, but once again, his anger was getting the best of him.

He takes his chance with what he's got
It's too late now to stop

He looked up to see the target of his fury exiting the store. Tim was none the wiser as he got in his car and started driving away.

Rick followed him, careful to keep his distance as not to be noticed.

After a few miles, Tim turned onto a secluded road. Rick sped up as he followed close behind him. Tim increased his speed as well and waved his arm out the window encouraging Rick to pass.

Rick only drove faster, nearly ramming his large truck into the back of Tim's smaller vehicle. The young man sped up more, clearly terrified at what was happening.

Rick blared his horn, and Tim swerved, again gesturing for him to pass. Rick pressed down on the gas, heading straight for Tim's car. He looked on as Tim lost control and veered into a ditch on the side of the dusty road.

Rick kept driving, not bothering to see the fate of the man he blamed for Kaley's death.

You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin' into your lie

Thirty-five minutes later and Rick entered his quiet home. He kicked off his boots and grabbed a beer out of the fridge. He almost dropped the can when he turned and saw Melanie standing behind him.

This time she was wearing the yellow sundress she wore the day he met her. Her long hair was up in a ponytail, and her brilliant green eyes bore into him. She said nothing, instead curling her thin pink lips into a satisfied grin.


The next day, Michonne arose early. It was Saturday and that meant she had time to spend painting and doing little odd jobs around the house.

She pulled on her burgundy wool coat, knit hat and scarf, and headed outside into the chilly October air. She could smell the scent of burning leaves as soon as she walked out the door. The smell was strangely comforting.

Her lawn was covered with shades of yellow, red, and orange. She figured she would rake the leaves, starting in the back and making her way to the front. As she walked to her backyard to grab the rake, she was startled by Rick standing near his shed.

"Oh my gosh…Rick, you scared me" she yelped, clutching her chest.

"Sorry, didn't mean to frighten you," he mumbled.

He was in one of his moods again. She could tell by the gruffness in his voice and lack of eye contact. It had been a little while since she had seen this mood, but it was familiar.

"I was just coming out to gather the leaves," she pressed on. "It's chilly out this morning." She rubbed her hands against her jean covered thighs, appreciating the warmth from the friction.

"Yep," he nodded, pulling his heavy brown jacket tighter.

"What are you up to today?" she asked, anxious to get more than one word out of him.

"I don't really know, Michonne. I hadn't thought that far…just came out here for some fresh air," he said curtly. He looked at her and recognized the frustration in her eyes. She was giving her all into getting to know him, and he was pushing her away again…ashamed of the person he was becoming.

Michonne held his stare. She recognized the look in his eyes, the look of grief. She'd seen the pain in his eyes many times now, but this time was different. It was more intense. She wondered if his sour mood was due to thoughts of his departed wife.

Mr. Nothing is late
He's running out of time
He questions whether chance or fate will ever show a sign

"I'm sorry to disturb you then. I'll let you enjoy your air in peace." She turned on her heels, ready to tackle her lawn.

He stopped her, grabbing her by the arm. "I'm sorry. I had a rough night. I didn't mean to take it out on you," he smiled weakly.

"I understand. We all have our days…and nights." She offered him a sympathetic smile. "I hope you have a better day today."

He swept his eyes across the soft features of her face. "If I'm being honest, seeing your pretty smile is helping. How do you manage to look so beautiful this early in the morning?"

Michonne blushed, happy that her rich, dark skin hid it well.

"You want to help me with this yard? Might help you get your mind off things," she proposed.

Ricked sighed, putting his hands in his pockets, "I guess I can't say no to a beautiful lady asking for my help."

Looks to the sky above
For a glimpse of what it means
And never never never make
Make no sense to him


An hour later and they were seated on her porch swing, enjoying mugs of hot coffee.

"I love Autumn," Michonne said, sipping her beverage. "What's your favorite season, Rick?"

He thought for a moment. "I like the fall, too. The crispness of the air always helps to clear my mind."

Michonne nodded in agreement. She stared at his profile for a spell. She loved the slope of his nose, his square jawline, the way a few strands of gray intertwined with the chestnut hair of his beard, the way his thick curls gathered at the nape of his neck. As she studied his face, she noticed something new…tiny, barely-there freckles peppering across the bridge of his nose and a small mole near his cheek, at the crease of his smile.

He looked over and caught her staring. "What?" he asked, secretly flattered that she was checking him out.

"Nothing, I was just admiring the view," she smirked.

"Is that so?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. "It can't be half as good as mine."

He dragged his eyes across her gorgeous face, appreciating her beautiful skin and warm brown eyes, the sparkling diamond stud in her nose, her high cheekbones, and her alluring lips. She was simply stunning.

"Charmer," she replied, avoiding his intense stare.

"Michonne, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, what do you want to know?" She sat her empty mug on the porch and turned her body into his, causing their knees to brush together.

"Why did your marriage end? We don't know each other that well, but I can't imagine anyone walking away from you."

The frankness of his statement caught her off guard. She twisted one of her soft locs around her finger, not sure where to begin or how much to share.

"I met my husband a few years after graduating college. It was after my days of traveling and finding myself," she said, forming air quotes with her fingers. "Anyway, he was a successful attorney at a great corporate law firm, and he swept me off my feet. He took me out to fancy dinners and showered me with gifts. He even gave me the money to start up my gallery…but eventually, things fell apart. I can't really say when it happened, but the distance between us grew. We stopped communicating and…he cheated with a colleague."

Rick noticed the pain spreading across her face. He took her hand in his, gently rubbing his thumb over hers. "I'm sorry he hurt you."

She smiled at his sweetness. His tender side was something new, but she was enjoying it very much. Rick Grimes was full of surprises.

"Yeah, I hired a private investigator to follow him. It was my friend, Claudia's idea. That's how I found out, complete with pictures of him in the act." She groaned and covered her face with her hands. "I was such an idiot."

Rick wrapped his arm around her. "Hey, don't say that. What he did ain't on you. We make our own choices in life. He chose to fuck up his marriage. That's on him." He slowly pulled her hands away from her face and rubbed his thumb across her cheek. "It's not your fault, Michonne."

They sat quietly for a while, simply enjoying being in each other's presence. Rick finished his coffee and sat down his mug. He proceeded to wrap both arms around Michonne, bringing her head to rest on his shoulder. He gently kissed her forehead. It was the most at peace either of them had felt since they moved to the small town.

He questions whether chance or fate will ever show a sign
Looks to the sky above
For a glimpse of what it means

"Rick…" Michonne said, breaking the silence. "Hmm?" he responded.

"How did your wife die?" she asked cautiously.

He figured she would ask at some point. He didn't like talking about it, but she had already been so open with him, he wanted to do the same.

"Melanie got a rare form of breast cancer called Inflammatory Breast Cancer. It's hard to diagnose and usually when it is, it's too late. That's what happened with her. She was having strange symptoms, she thought it was a rash caused from stress or something harmless. We never thought it would be cancer. She was only 31 years old. Anyway, it turns out that's what it was. She died a year later."

Michonne grasped his arm. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. I'm sorry she had to go through that. Tell me something good about her. How did you meet?"

He smiled down at her. "Ah, we met at a party. My brother was dating her best friend. I thought she had the most captivating eyes. I went up and started talking to her and we hit it off."

He internally admonished himself, realizing his mistake of mentioning his brother. He wasn't prepared to share more about his family.

"That's sweet. So, you have a brother? What's his name? Where does he live?"

"Do you always ask this many questions?" he queried.

"I'm sorry if it's making you uncomfortable," she said sincerely.

He kissed her temple. "No, it's alright. His name is Shane. He still lives in King County. He was a deputy until he got badly injured on the job. Now, he helps my dad with the family business."

"What's that?" she asked, grateful he hadn't shut down the conversation. She enjoyed learning more about him.

"My dad owns a furniture store. He handcrafts most of the items himself, but he has a small staff to help out."

"Hmmm, that's really something. Are you good with your hands, too?" she asked suggestively.

Her thinly veiled question wasn't lost on him. Despite the cool weather, he suddenly felt warm. He glared at her as she sucked her bottom lip into her mouth.

"I haven't had any complaints," he answered, grinning mischievously. They had agreed to get to know one another before getting physical again, but damn was she making it hard. "You don't play fair, Michonne."

She grinned back, noticing the flush spreading across his handsome face.

"I'm not sure what you mean," she feigned innocence. "Listen, I was thinking…remember the church I told you about, where I'm volunteering…"

"Yeah, I remember," he offered.

"They hold these classes helping young people with life issues, you know making the right choices and staying out of trouble...that sort of thing. Anyway, I was thinking maybe you could go talk to the kids and give them some advice. I'm sure having been a cop; you have a lot to share."

Rick tensed up, obviously uncomfortable with her suggestion. "I don't think I'll be able to do that."

She lifted her head off his shoulder and raised her eyebrows in confusion. "Why not?"

"I just think that's better left to active officers. I'm sure they've got a great force over there in Savannah," he shrugged.

Michonne was perplexed by his excuse but decided not to push. She didn't want to upset him, remembering his demeanor from earlier that morning.

He's good at being what he's not
Gives nothing away

"Okay, you're right. Forget I asked"

He nodded and ran his fingers though his hair. "I'm gonna head in and take care of a few things before work."

"Okay…do you want to come over for dinner after your shift?"

"Thanks, but I'll probably be pretty tired. Raincheck?" he asked, getting up to leave.

She tried to hide her disappointment. "Yeah…of course. I'll see you later."

"Alright, enjoy your day off. See you later."

She watched him as he walked away. Every time she felt like they were making progress, he would shut down again. It was unnerving, but she wasn't ready to give up. It was obvious he just needed a little more time to work through whatever had him so on edge.

You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin'
You give and you take and take what you got
Round and round 'till it breaks


A couple of weeks passed and things between Rick and Michonne continued to be hot and cold. However, she hadn't been able to focus on it too much, being busy with work and taking over a couple of Tim's sessions at the church.

He was healing from a minor injury to his arm and she was happy to step in for him. He'd been evasive about how he acquired the injury, but she didn't push. Dealing with Rick's elusiveness had built up her patience, so she allowed Tim his privacy.

She looked out her bedroom window and released a breath. Today was Halloween, a dreaded day for her. She missed Kyle so much on this day. He loved to dress up and go trick-or-treating. They always had so much fun. Kyle would pick a costume and she and Ed would dress accordingly. The last costume he picked was Miles Morale's Spider-Man. She dressed up as Spider-Gwen and Ed was the original Spider-Man.

She sat on her bed and cried, thinking about how much she wished she could hold her baby again…wishing she was taking him to fill his bag with candy…wishing she could fight with him one more time about not eating too much.

She held her pillow close to her chest, closing her eyes to envision his bright smile.

"Oh Kyle, what is mommy going to do without you? Nothing makes sense anymore…as hard as I try…I can't make anything make sense anymore. I miss you so much," she sobbed. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you my sweet baby." Her tears intensified as she sank onto the bed and gripped the pillow tighter.


Rick looked out his front window and exhaled. He saw the houses on the street, adorned with spiderwebs, skeletons, ghosts, goblins, gravestones, and Jack-o-lanterns. Soon trick-or-treaters would be eagerly parading through the streets, full of excitement and anticipation at filling their treat bags. He decided to keep his porch lights off, hoping that would deter anyone from ringing his doorbell.

He hated this day…just another in a long list of days that reminded him of Kaley. He thought about her last Halloween. Melanie was too sick, so he took Kaley out around the neighborhood by himself. She dressed as Ariel from The Little Mermaid. She was obsessed with the character's red hair, which resembled her own. They had fun despite Melanie's absence. After trick-or-treating, they stopped for a slice of pepperoni pizza, Kaley's favorite meal.

He headed into the kitchen to grab a drink when he heard a knock at the door. He opened to find Michonne standing there. He could tell she had been crying. Her eyes were red and puffy. Despite that, she still looked lovely, with her hair in a high bun and large gold hoop earrings hanging from her ears.

"Can I come in?" she asked quietly. "Yeah, sure come on" he said, taking her arm and leading her inside. He closed the door and rubbed her shoulders. "You okay?" She sighed. "Not really. I'm just having a really bad day."

He could relate. He pushed his own feelings aside to inquire about her. "You wanna talk about it?"

She shook her head. "Not right now. I just wanted to see you. I hope you don't mind me dropping by like this?"

He started unbuttoning her coat. "Not at all. I'm happy you came by. I've been having a pretty shitty day myself." He pushed the coat over her shoulders and slid it off. "Have a seat. Can I get you a drink?"

"Just some water would be nice," she said, sitting on his sofa. "Of course," he replied, going into the kitchen.

Michonne looked around his tidy home. It was only the second time she'd been inside. The décor was simple with a cream leather sofa, loveseat and armchair. There was a large flatscreen tv hanging above the brick fireplace and two end tables with lamps.

"Here you go," Rick said, handing her the glass of water and taking a seat beside her. "So, you're not going to tell me what's wrong?"

"I just really hate Halloween," she conceded. "It brings up memories that I'd rather keep buried."

He looked puzzled. Obviously, she was keeping things close to her chest and he couldn't blame her. He was doing the same.

"Would you believe me if I told you I feel the exact same way? I was just about to shut all the lights off, so I didn't have to be bothered by trick-or-treaters."

She smiled faintly. "I have a better idea. Let's get out of here."

"And go where?" he inquired.

"I don't know. Let's just take a ride into town and see where we end up. Please…I really need to get my mind off a few things."

He pondered her request for a beat. He had no desire to go out but hearing the desperation in her voice made it impossible to say no to her.

"Okay, let me grab my coat."

Another day goes on by
And he never speaks his heart
He takes his chance with what he's got
It's too late now to stop


Michonne and Rick found themselves sitting at the back of a theater waiting on the movie Antebellum to start. Michonne munched on red vines while Rick stuffed his mouth with popcorn.

Michonne looked over to him, smiling. "So, I guess this is our first date."

"I guess you're right," he chuckled. "I can't believe you talked me into this, Michonne. I'm not really a fan of horror movies."

"Well, thanks for indulging me. Scary movies are my favorite," she smiled sweetly. "Seriously, thank you for keeping me company Rick."

"Well, thanks for dragging me out of my misery," he returned.

The lights dimmed as the movie began. Michonne gently laid her head on Rick's shoulder. He discreetly sniffed her hair as her soft locs brushed against his chin. It smelled of toasted almonds and vanilla. He wondered what hair products she used to get it to smell so good. It was intoxicating.

She held a red vine to his lips and he happily accepted the sweet treat, taking a bite before allowing her to finish it off.

He could barely focus on the movie, as he was distracted with being so close to Michonne in a dark, confined space.

At one point she looked up to him with her doe eyes. "Are you paying attention?" she asked.

"Yeah," he responded. "Liar," she grinned.

He smiled and captured her soft lips with his own, gifting her with a series of tender kisses. "I'm watching it, I promise," he smiled.


Once the movie concluded, they walked out of the theater holding hands.

"I gotta admit, the movie was pretty good," Rick proffered. "I knew you would like it. It got good reviews," Michonne retorted.

"Yeah, but sometimes reviews are unreliable," he countered. "Okay, you may be right about that, but I'm glad you enjoyed it," she said, gripping his hand tighter.

"Mostly, I just needed a night out. So, thanks again for asking me to come," he replied.

"Hey Rick, nice to see you," a soft voice interrupted.

Rick and Michonne turned to see Elaina from the post office, standing behind them. Elaina looked at Michonne curiously before turning her gaze back to Rick.

"Oh hey, how's it goin?" Rick asked, the woman's name escaping him.

"Um, good. It's been awhile since I've seen you in town. I guess I know how you've been keeping busy," she quipped, once again eyeing Michonne.

Rick and Michonne both stared blankly at her, thrown off by her peculiar comment. He placed his hand to the small of Michonne's back, encouraging her to keep walking. "Okay, well I'll see you around," he called back to Elaina.

"What the hell was that?" Michonne questioned, climbing up into Rick's truck. He closed the door behind her then walked around to the driver's side.

"Honestly, I have no idea. I don't even remember her name. She works at the post office."

"Well, clearly she remembers yours. The way she was eye-fucking you, I'd say she remembers a lot more."

Rick looked over at her like she was speaking Latin. "What? I don't see how. I never touched her. She offered to cook me dinner. I didn't take her up on the offer. That was the end of it."

She looked at him questioningly, concluding he was being truthful. "Honest, Michonne. I'm not interested in her," he assured her, putting the truck into gear.

They drove away, unaware that Merle had been watching them since they exited the theater. He watched them drive away as his friend Simon came up behind him and slapped his shoulder.

"Wasn't that the prick who broke your nose at the bar?" Simon chuckled. "Shut the hell up," Merle grunted. "Yeah, that was him."

"I thought so. It's a shame how he made a damn fool outta you."

"Don't worry about it. I gotta a little surprise for him. I know where him and his black bitch live."

Mr. Nothing is late
He's running out of time


Michonne laced up her sneakers, grabbed her water bottle and headed out the door for her morning jog.

She was feeling good this morning after her night with Rick. Following the movie, they indulged in a quick nightcap. She was longing for more and she knew he was too, but they had vowed to take it slow, so alas they ended the night with an embrace and a gentle kiss and went their separate ways.

She jogged through her neighborhood, admiring the Victorian Style cottages and colonials along the way. The occasional neighbor out walking their dog or engaging in their own exercise regimen would send her a wave and she happily reciprocated.

She stopped when she came to a small bridge over a creek. She took in the view before her. Mother nature had painted her brush across the landscape, and the trees were bursting with Autumn colors. Michonne closed her eyes and inhaled the crisp air as it caressed her face. It felt cleansing.

She thought about Rick. She knew there was still more they needed to know about one another, but she felt the walls slowly starting to come down between them. Something about being wrapped in his arms made her feel safe and secure. She was at peace when she was with him. The effect he was having on her frightened her a little. She still had to work on herself and being wrapped up in Rick was not part of the plan, especially when he seemed to be struggling with his own demons. Nevertheless, she wanted to be near him.

Looking across the bridge, she spied a doe and her fawns drinking from the stream. The sight was bittersweet…a mother protecting and nurturing her babies.

She sighed, thinking about how she failed to do that for Kyle. Her guilt at not protecting him spilled over once again and she felt the stinging of tears pooling in her eyes. She knew her thoughts were irrational, but every now and then, they would surface, and she would have to spend days crawling out of her despair.

She closed her eyes and repeated to herself, "You did your best. You loved him and you did your best."

When she opened them, a pretty butterfly landed on the ledge in front of her. She instantly felt comfort. She knew it was a sign from Kyle. He wanted her to let go of her guilt and grief. He wanted her to remain on the path toward recovery. She smiled and continued down the trail.

You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin'


A little while later and Michonne arrived back home. She immediately sensed something was off as she opened her front door. She heard water running in the kitchen and went to investigate. She gasped seeing water spilling over from the sink onto the tiled floor. She rushed to turn it off, nearly slipping in the process.

"What the hell? I don't remember leaving this on," she mumbled, feeling increasingly uneasy. She did a quick scan of the room. Nothing seemed out of place. She walked into the living room. All was in order. Afraid to venture any further into the house, she bolted out the door to go get Rick.

She frantically knocked on his door. Once he opened, he noticed the panic on her face. "What's wrong?"

"I was out jogging and when I came back, water was running in the kitchen. It spilled all over the floor. It's so weird. I don't remember leaving it on," she huffed.

He grimaced. "That is weird. You sure you didn't leave it running?" he asked, narrowing his eyes on her.

"Can you just come over and take a look around? Please?" she begged.

"Yeah…sure," he agreed, shutting the door, and following her over to her place.

He looked at the water on the kitchen floor. "That's quite a mess. I'll help you clean it up after I look around. Stay here."

Michonne nodded in agreement, wrapping herself in her arms. Rick went to the back of the house to check the bedrooms and restrooms, while she looked out the window surveying the yard.

"Rick, do you see anything?" she called out to him.

"Do you always leave the window in your guestroom open?" he shouted back.

Her stomach dropped. She was sure she hadn't opened the window. She never used the room. She walked back to join Rick. "No, I never open this window," she said, her voice shaking.

Rick looked at her skeptically. "Michonne, are you sure? You need to be sure."

She closed her eyes and exhaled. Her mind was racing. This wasn't the first time she'd experienced something like this, but it hadn't happened in nearly a year. Right after Kyle died, she would find herself losing time. She would find things out of place or missing altogether. Sometimes she would even sleepwalk. It was a disturbing side effect of her grief.

You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin'
You give and you take and take what you got
Round and round 'till it breaks and
You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin' into your lie

"Rick…I have to tell you something." She looked into his eyes, trying to steady the emotions that were threatening to overwhelm her.

He placed his hands on her shoulders. "You're trembling. What is it? You can tell me."

"My divorce wasn't the only reason I moved here. A year and a half ago…I…I lost…"

Her words faltered when she heard the chime of the doorbell. Rick dropped his arms from her shoulders then led her out to the front door. "Check before opening it," he cautioned.

She looked through the peephole and her body stiffened. She sighed and slowly opened the door.

"Hello, Chonne. Can I come in?"

Edward narrowed his eyes on them as he waited to be invited inside.


Lyrics: Push Pull by Nikka Costa