Chapter Four
He knelt next to her for a long time. It was almost as if she'd never woken up at all. She was completely still, features smooth and impassive. Reaching out for her hand, he noted that her skin was warm. If nothing else, that was a good sign.
With a sigh and a wince, he raised himself to his feet, hobbling over to his trunk, which had been restored to full size. After rummaging around, he extracted a pack of cigarettes and left the room.
It seemed to take him forever to make it outside, sitting on the ledge of their bedroom window, not wanting to get too far away unless she woke up again. Lighting the cigarette with his wand tip he couldn't help but be grateful that he was so close when she'd woken up, and that it was extremely lucky timing that it had happened in the middle of the night.
He was also thankful that Mrs Potter hadn't questioned him earlier that day when he'd told her that he'd rather stay close to Lyra as opposed to moving into a room of his own to see out the rest of his recovery. He didn't doubt that she'd taken it on face value, that of course he wouldn't want to leave Lyra's side when she was still in critical condition, when she was still unconscious. And she wouldn't have been wrong thinking that. Of course, Sirius wanted to stay close to his sister, she'd almost died for Merlin's sake and of course he wanted to be there when she woke up, but what Mrs Potter didn't realise was that that was much more of a need rather than a want.
The sound of the front door opening and closing was enough to make Sirius tense, he immediately dropped the cigarette, stamping it out, getting to ready to explain to Mr or Mrs Potter, or both, what he was doing sitting outside in the middle of the night. Thankfully, James' face appeared seconds later, wand lighting his face. Sirius loosed a breath, reaching almost instinctively for another cigarette, holding one out for James as well.
For a while, neither said anything until James, leaning against the ledge, looked behind him through the window.
'She awake yet?'
Sirius gave a nod, 'A few minutes ago.' Not missing the wary look James shot him, Sirius chuckled. 'Don't worry, the room's still in one piece.'
'Well that's good,' James said. 'That would've taken some explaining, I reckon.'
After another moment's silence, James pushed to his feet, gently slapping Sirius' shoulder. 'C'mon,' he said. 'It's about time you saw your Christmas present,' he added at the confused look Sirius shot him.
With what was the start of giddy anticipation, Sirius rose from the ledge and limped after James who had disappeared around the side of the house. He followed him until they reached the large shed in the backyard. James threw a smirk over his shoulder as he swung the doors open and revealed…
Nothing.
Sirius frowned. Apart from some quidditch broomsticks, a pile of old flowerpots, some broken and rusted cauldrons, and a long work bench laden with boxes labelled with different potion ingredients, there was nothing Sirius hadn't seen before.
'Uh, James?'
James quickly tutted him into silence as he moved to the back corner of the room, lighting some candles with a flick of his wand as he went. When he reached the empty back corner, James reached out and closed his hand over thin air, pulling it back to reveal.
Sirius felt his jaw drop. 'Holy mother of Merlin, Prongs!' Sirius breathed as he made his way to stand next to James whose grin had made the boys cheeks disappear.
It was glorious. It was just like the ones in the posters he had back in his room at Grimmauld Place, or in the magazines currently sitting in his trunk. Closing the distance, he ran his hand over the leather seat.
'How – Where, where did you get it?'
James smirked somewhat sheepishly. 'Some muggle down the street, sold it to me.'
At Sirius' raised eyebrow, James snorted. 'At least that's what I told Lily.'
Sirius smirked in return, realising that "sold" most likely meant "stole". Looking it over, he noticed some dials and buttons that he'd never seen in the muggle pictures.
'I've been adding some stuff to it,' James said. 'Y'know, like a levitation charm, undetectable extension charm in the storage compartment, things like that.'
Sirius had to admit, he was impressed. 'And Lily helped you with this?'
'Well, she helped me with figuring out how it works – how the muggles use it. I didn't mention the other stuff.'
They chuckled, both imagining Lily's reaction when she realised that her boyfriend had been tampering with a muggle motorcycle.
'Well, it's perfect,' Sirius said as James covered it again with the invisibility cloak. 'Best Christmas present ever.'
James patted him on the back as they made their way back to the house. 'What are you going to tell your parents when you take the cloak back to Hogwarts?'
James snorted. 'Doesn't matter. Told them it was broken, didn't I. They don't know the first thing about muggle transportation.'
'Lyra's gonna kill you, y'know,' Sirius smirked.
At this, James' grin slackened a little, making Sirius laugh, his first true laugh in days.
'Don't worry, I'm not gonna to tell her!'
oooOOOooo
'What did you say to me!'
Never before had Lyra seen her father so angry. He seemed to tower over everything and everyone in the small room, taking up every corner of it. She could feel his fury, igniting the tight air, it clawed at her throat and made her skin burn. His wand was held in a shaking, white-knuckle grip by his side, sparks spitting from its tip. A vein throbbing violently on his forehead.
Lyra pleaded with Sirius to just, for once, keep his mouth shut, to not rise to the bait. Her throat constricted painfully, cutting off her cries, when Sirius stepped forward.
'You heard me, you crazed-'
With a deep growl, Orion Black seized Sirius shirt collar.
'No!' Lyra tried to step in between them. She felt the tips of her fingers burn almost painfully as she balled them into fists, willing herself to calm for just a moment longer. She just needed to get to Sirius, if she could get to him, she could stop him, she could save him. Shrugging off the clawing grip of her mother, Lyra took another step towards Sirius.
She didn't see Orion's fist coming as it hit her across the face. She hit the end of her bed frame with a cry as it caught her around the ribs, landing heavily on the wooden floor. She managed to shake the shock of the pain off in time to see Orion dragging Sirius towards the door without so much as a backwards glance.
Lyra scrambled to her feet as Sirius started spitting curses, trying desperately to free himself. They were almost out of the room, Sirius flinging a hand out to grab hold of the door frame, twisting to look behind him. Stumbling dangerously, Lyra took a shaky step towards him, holding her hands out for his when she was caught from behind again, leaden arms tightening around her injured ribs.
'Sirius!'
Her mother's strong grip around her middle jerked Lyra away from Sirius' panicked face.
And then Sirius was calling out her name, just as frantically as she was calling his.
'You've had this coming for a long time, boy!' Orion snarled as he finally managed to tear Sirius from the door.
With one more almighty heave, Lyra momentarily broke free of her mother's hold. She only just managed to grab hold of Sirius's hand for a fraction of a second, but it was long enough.
The burning sensation that had been building within, burst free, boiling with a vengeance and rolled from her fingertips in warm, powerful waves into Sirius' own hand.
For a moment, time stopped as Sirius stared at her, eyes wide, mouth open as he shook his head ever so slightly at what she had just done. In return she managed to release a very watery, now very bloody smile that she hoped passed as a reassuring one. If it were possible, Sirius' eyes widened more.
'No! Lyra!'
And then they were torn from each other, and Sirius was pulled, screaming Lyra's name, from her room by their father whilst Lyra, sobbing, calling out to him, struggled in the vice-like grip of their mother. The feeling of a wand tip, scorching hot, pressing deep into the side of her neck had her stop struggling at once.
She had one last glimpse of Sirius' petrified face as he was thrown into his room before his bedroom door slammed shut, locking him and Orion inside.
ooOOoo
Remus rubbed his eyes, trying to relieve the stinging from another night of no sleep. Every time he'd closed his eyes, the image of a blood-drenched Lyra would flash before him. At one point he'd heard James and Sirius' voices outside, but he was numb. His curiosity, along with every other positive feeling he'd ever felt, had shrunk in comparison to the gaping darkness that had filled him.
At some point he'd made his way downstairs and perched himself on the end of Lyra's bed. He wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting here, watching her, Sirius snoring lightly on the other side of the room.
The worry that had been in full burn over the last few hours was now a steady flame. Somewhere in the recesses of that darkness within him, anger had reared its head, growling into the gloom that had swallowed him whole. He was reminded, now more than ever before, the amazing capacity the Black twins seemed to have for evasion. He'd always known that they'd kept the true extent of the abuse they faced at home from the rest of them, no matter how much assurances were made by the others that they could help.
Between Sirius' jokes and brooding demands for them to drop it, and Lyra's soft scoffs and promises that the situation could be handled without them, Remus supposed that such a bloody ending had always been inevitable. But just because it may have already existed as a distant, distasteful possibility, didn't mean that it was any easier to accept.
A shift in Sirius' snores roused Remus from his lament. Looking over his shoulder, he saw Sirius begin to toss, forehead pinched and beaded with sweat, bedsheets starting to bunch around his waist. Remus was already halfway off Lyra's bed to go wake Sirius up, when her breathing shifted. It was small, if it were anyone else sitting beside her, they wouldn't have noticed. But Remus could tell, he knew her.
Her increased breathing, and Sirius' thrashing only lasted a second before it broke. Sirius heaved into consciousness, gripping the sides of the bed with white knuckles, blinking rapidly around the room. It pulled Remus' attention for the second time, away from Lyra. As Sirius took in the room, remembering where he was and everything that had happened, his eyes stopped, growing impossibly wider on a point next to Remus.
Remus new what that look meant and as he turned back, he found Lyra staring up at the ceiling, unblinking, her laboured breaths the only indicator that she, too, had startled into consciousness. The initial relief that flooded him, seeking to drown that darkness within him, at seeing her awake, quickly retreated as he looked at her eyes.
James had told him once that within Pureblood circles, there were rumours about the strange eyes of Lyra Black. These rumours, started mostly by young children – but not dissuaded by the adults – reached as far as the Potter's ears, a family that would never claim to be traditional Purebloods or walk in their circles.
Some of the stories were ridiculous, that Lyra was medusa reborn, a basilisk personified, that if she looked you in the eyes, you would die instantly. Remus had snorted in amusement when he'd heard this. Although, as an afterthought, he admitted to himself that Lyra was intimidating enough to give this rumour some weight.
But other tales, whispered amongst some, most likely the reason that some of the younger students in the Great Hall would sometimes pay more attention to the Gryffindor table when Lyra would enter the room, were much harder to dismiss.
Yes, Lyra's eyes were a thing of terrible beauty. Dark pupils encased by deep masses of constantly swirling shades of silver, they had the ability to hold whoever looked at them captive. But they were rarely seen by those she didn't choose. Remus would always remember that it took years for him to finally see them properly.
But now, all he could think of was the way those irises swirled, rushing currents forever stuck in the pupil's gravity, and how they had now seemed to slacken to a slow stream. They still held their usual captivating power, but it had been horrifyingly diminished.
Remus squeezed her hand. 'Lyra?'
It took a moment, but finally she blinked, once. Twice. And then she looked at him. And smiled.
It was small, barely even pulling at the corners of her mouth, but it was there. And he answered with the biggest smile he could muster. And then the relief was back, in a crashing tidal wave that rushed through him, making his hold on her hand tighten.
ooOOoo
James joined them a short time later, the wide grin that broke out on his face upon seeing Lyra awake, made her feel a little more at ease. There would truly be something terribly wrong with the world if it no longer contained a grinning James Potter.
For a short time, everyone seemed to be content to be together, talking about nothing in particular. It was obvious to Lyra that the boys were making a conscious effort to keep the conversation light-hearted, flitting from who Gryffindor needed to beat to end up with the Quidditch Cup, to James' recount of recently meeting Lily's sister and her fiancé.
She groaned when he told them how it ended. If she closed her eyes, she could picture a sobbing Lily, face in her hands, elbows resting on the top of a restaurant table. There was no doubt that James, while somewhat remorseful, arm around his girlfriend, whispering apologies and pleas that they leave in her ear, would still be glancing back at the front door with a smirk at having upset the poor muggles. It made her want to laugh and scold him at the same time.
Their attempts to ease the tension of recent events worked to a point and Lyra was grateful for their efforts. But she knew how much Sirius wanted the others to leave so he could interrogate her about what happened. Knowing that it would be better to get it out of the way sooner rather than having the tension grow didn't make her any more eager.
Since waking, after the initial shock and confusion wore off, anxiety had been rising like a pool of water in her chest. They were alone. They would never again walk through their parent's house, no longer be forced to attend uncomfortable dinner parties and never again be forced to think about her future on her parent's terms. She should be relieved; she and Sirius had managed to free themselves from a prison they'd been confined to their whole lives. And in a few days, they'd be back on the train to Hogwarts . . .
And just like that, the anxiety was on the rise again. And that wasn't the only thing . . .
Grabbing a gentle hold of Remus' arm, she pulled him closer. 'Help me up?' she tried to say as quietly as she could.
Unfortunately, it wasn't quiet enough. Sirius, who had returned to sit on the edge of his own bed after James had joined them shot to his feet, not even flinching as he automatically put weight on his bad leg.
'Help?' he said, looking from Lyra to Remus and back again. 'What do you mean? What's wrong?'
Lyra just barely supressing the urge to roll her eyes, gripped onto Remus tighter as she pushed the bedding away from her. 'Nothing's wrong,' she muttered, legs now free, Remus having helped her significantly as a tight pain flared with every movement.
Sirius frowned. 'Help means that something's wrong,' he said fiercely. 'Now what's wrong? What do you need help with!'
'I need to go to the bathroom!' Lyra ground out, at the end of her tether and bladder now painfully full.
Sirius automatically made to cross the room. 'Well, I can help –'
'Remus will do fine,' Lyra said, glaring at her brother now, liquid silver eyes picking up speed, a clear warning.
Having been on the receiving end of that particular look many times in his life, Sirius ignored her and shot his own warning look at Remus as the sandy haired boy helped Lyra slowly from the bed.
Remus, now having been on the receiving end of Sirius' looks for long enough, raised his eyebrows in response, his way of helplessly saying 'what you gonna do?' without getting himself jinxed.
It took the two forever to leave the room, Sirius not sitting down until they had, watching and analysing every step Lyra made.
Everything hurt.
She'd placed her left arm on top of Remus' right, who held it and her as steady as he could, supporting most of her by wrapping an arm around her waist. He had obviously known that her arm was injured. Unfortunately, she didn't realise until they'd already started walking, by which point letting him go so he could support her from the other side was no longer an option. He was the only thing stopping her from falling flat on her face. But compared to the pain coming from her stomach, her arm was easy enough to ignore.
After what felt like an eternity, they made it to the bathroom, both of them letting out an inaudible sigh of relief as Remus pushed the door open. He hesitated on the threshold.
'Do you need me to –'
Not helping the smirk from rising, Lyra patted his arm. 'I'll be fine,' she said, placing a hand on the bathroom wall. Remus had almost completely let go of her when she stopped and turned as quickly as she could manage, leaning towards him and pressing her lips to his. It was a short and shallow thing, but it conveyed what she needed it to. She was here, and she was safe, and she'd be fine.
It took her a frustratingly long time to do something that would normally only take a matter of minutes. Suffice it to say, by the time she opened the bathroom door again to find Remus leant against the opposite wall waiting for her, she was decidedly more irritated then she had been before. She wasn't used to feeling weak, being slow. She'd purposefully avoided looking in the mirror, not ready to face the truth of what had been done to her. What she could feel was more than enough at the moment.
The hobble back to the guest room had them passing the living room again, but this time she noticed the dressed-up tree in the corner.
Lyra frowned. 'I thought you were spending Christmas with your parents?'
Despite not looking at him – eyes firmly planted on the floor which seemed to sway slightly – Lyra could perfectly picture the expression on Remus' face as it morphed from surprise to stony.
'Uh yeah,' he said quickly. 'Change of plans.'
Raising an eyebrow at his tone, Lyra chanced a glance at him. Just as she thought, his jaw was clenched, the muscles she could feel bellow her arm, tense. 'Remus, I thought you were going to at least try and talk with him.'
'Lyra, it's fine,' Remus started, no doubt about to repeat the same speech she'd heard a thousand times, but was cut off by a cry coming from the stairwell they'd just passed.
'Lyra?!' Rushing footfalls followed the outcry and suddenly Mrs Potter was standing in front of them, a most displeased frown on her face that had Lyra instinctively shrinking into Remus' side, eyes quickly replanting themselves on the floor at her feet. 'You really shouldn't be out of bed! Remus, I thought you would have known better!'
Lyra had never heard the woman sounding so stern, sounding so, familiar. 'Please, Mrs Potter, don't blame him,' she said, flicking her eyes briefly in the woman's general direction, quickly trying to salvage the situation. 'I just needed to use the bathroom.'
At the admission, Mrs Potter relented a fraction, shoulders dropping slightly. 'Hmm, well you still shouldn't be walking around, you're still healing. Now quick, back to bed with you,' she said, walking back to the guest room, waving them along. 'And I insist you call me Mia,' she called over her shoulder, her voice an interesting mixture of exasperation, geniality, and annoyance. 'I may be old, but I'm not ancient.'
Remus and Lyra shared an amused look before continuing to the guest room.
ooOOoo
The rest of the day – much to Lyra's growing resentment – was spent napping, the short trip to and from the bathroom apparently taking it out of her completely. She tried to hide from the others how much this fact got to her, trying instead to concentrate on everything Mr and Mrs Potter told her about the potions they'd had her on, and the salve that they'd been using.
But the thoughts that had grown in her mind whilst walking to the bathroom had festered into a slimy, dark root system that had taken hold, wrapping itself tightly around all parts of her, forcing her jaw to clench and her shoulders to ache with the strain of being held so taut.
And after everyone had gone to bed, after Mrs Potter had forced Lyra to eat a small helping of fruit salad, after Lyra convinced Remus that she'd still be there in the morning (both of them ignoring Sirius' glare and James' smirk as they gently hugged good night), after night had well and truly fallen, it was just Sirius and her. And she couldn't avoid him anymore.
'They could have killed you,' Sirius ground out, sitting on the edge of his bed, elbows digging into his knees as he rubbed at his temples.
'And they would have killed you,' Lyra replied in her own restrained tone.
Sirius pulled up. His jaw ticking as the image of Lyra breaking free of their mother's hold and grabbing his hand flashed in his mind. He could still feel the heat that had washed through him at her touch and the horror he'd felt soon after when he realised what she'd done.
Shaking away the image, he looked at her. It would be easy to tell himself that she was still weak, that they shouldn't be yelling at one another. But then she leaned forwards wincing as she did so, looking right into his eyes and he realised that she didn't need to yell, she'd never needed to.
'You cannot tell me that you would have done nothing . . . you cannot sit here and tell me that you wouldn't have done exactly the same thing if you were me.'
His jaw clenched tighter. Cursing her logic, cursing the fact that she always seemed to get the upper hand in their arguments.
'I didn't think so,' she said after a moment's silence, leaning back into her pillows and closing her eyes.
Sirius closed his eyes too, lamenting the fact that he'd have to drop this particular subject for another time. But there was something else he might be able to win, something that had been gnawing away at him just as insistently. Opening his eyes, he looked about the room, his gaze catching on a small photograph, framed on the far wall. It was of a much younger Mr and Mrs Potter, twirling in front of a fountain, a small child, which he assumed was James, held between them. Sirius had never been more jealous of James than he had been over the last few days.
'About dinner . . .'
Lyra sighed before he could say anything else. 'Can't we just drop it?'
'No!' Sirius blinked, surprised at the harshness he heard in his voice. Taking a second to compose himself, he turned to meet Lyra's gleaming eyes.
'You're not going to ignore this one, Lyra. You can't do that with everything you don't like thinking about.'
Lyra clenching her jaw.
'I apologise for what I did at dinner,' Lyra said.
'I'm not talking about what you did!'
Lyra blinked across at him.
Sirius barely had time to register her confusion as he ploughed ahead. 'There was more to that conversation than what was being said, and I know you know it too, there's no point denying that.'
'I'm not denying anything.' She said slowly, making him feel like he was twelve years old again, listening to her lecture him about Regulus. Annoyance flared through him. 'What are you hoping to learn from all this, anyway?'
There was a moments silence. They both knew why he was bringing it up. They both knew why he was interested and what it was he was hoping to learn. It was the same thing he'd wanted to know more about since they were seven years old.
She was being obtuse on purpose; she was deliberately trying to get him to say something she already knew. It was times like these that made it hard for him to ignore how perfect of a Slytherin fit she would have made. A fact that angered him even more than her tactics.
'Just tell me that you're not connecting any of this to those ridiculous rumours.'
Again, Sirius didn't answer her.
Lyra groaned. 'I will never understand why you choose to be dragged into this . . . this nonsense!'
'Well, you've got to admit that it would explain some things, though, wouldn't it?'
He tried not to shrink under the weight of her stare, however brief it may have been before she looked away, shielding her eyes under their lids.
'Look, we've been hearing this bullshit our whole lives. And I'm sick of hearing about it from people like the Rosiers,' he sneered.
'What's your point!' Lyra snapped.
'My point is that I have every right and reason to go looking for answers, Lyra. They were obviously hiding something from us, and not just Mother and Father, but everyone that night, and everyone else, every time before that. And you can't pretend it doesn't have anything to do with us, not after this, not after what's happened because of it.'
'Have you ever stopped to consider the possibility that uncovering whatever it is that you think they're hiding may do more harm than good? We are what we are Sirius, and whatever that is, maybe you should just accept it. Leave it in peace. Move on.'
Lyra levelled him with a look that made it clear that the conversation was now over, and this time when she closed her eyes, she had no intention of opening them again until morning.
So what do we think of Lyra so far?
Thank you to all those currently following this story and a special shout out to x3sunnydaay for your lovely comment! It really pushed me to post this update (even though I'm not entirely happy with this chapter).
Despite the obvious stray from canon that I've taken with this fic, I am going to try and work in things from the HP books that I feel I could head-canon. I'll be pointing them out as they pop up in chapters.
Till next time (where we'll catch up with Regulus), stay safe, stay happy.
