Chapter Eleven

I can't believe I did that. I'm so stupid!

Ella clutched her pillow harder and sobbed into it, her heart broken. He didn't love her. He'd frozen when she'd pecked his cheek. Like she'd slapped him.

She was crying so hard she didn't hear the door open, and was surprised when a gentle hand rested on her shoulder, flinching away.

"Ella, I saw you run in here," Rex murmured.

She sniffled.

He sighed and sat beside her. "Come on. It's Echo, isn't it?"

She nodded, hiccuping.

He sighed and pulled her to him. "What happened?"

She sighed a shuddering breath, then began, "I was tending his wound. You know. Then I was getting him to lie down and had the brilliant idea to kiss his cheek."

"Okay…?"

"W-Well, I did and he froze, and he looked like I'd just sucker punched him."

"And so you think he doesn't like you."

"He couldn't like me!" she cried. "Rex, everyone keeps telling me he likes me, but I can't see it! If it's so obvious, why can't I see it?"

The captain laughed, "Because it's you. You're the one who wants it the most, but you want it to be real so you second guess every sign he throws your way, and then equit it to being friendliness or a quirk or a lapse of good judgement or something. He adores you, Ella."

"Then why—"

"Because he's never been kissed before. Most of the men on this ship haven't been kissed before. I haven't. I'm one of the oldest."

Oh.

That made sense.

She'd never been kissed either.

And she'd noticed that the clones were all touch starved. Of course he'd react the way he did to a peck on the cheek.

Rex chuckled, "You really are something. One day I'll tell you a story. Can't tell you now. But I will tell you this. Echo absolutely loves you. The man practically worships the ground you walk on. He's shy. You and I both know he is. But he cares about you. He's gonna try to talk to you soon. He's probably gonna day stupid things. He usually does when he's nervous. It's because he cares so much his brain won't put together logical sentences."

Ella giggled wryly at this.

I'm in love with a nerd.

"I'm telling you all this so you can be prepared to get your man. He second guesses too." He rolled his eyes. "No wonder this thing is taking so long. Wish you'd just kiss and move on to lovey doveyness."

"So do I," she agreed.

They laughed.

"I'm sure you do," Rex huffed.

Ella smiled and squeezed him tight. "Thanks for doing this for me, Rex. You're a lifesaver."

He beamed, "Nah. I'd have beaten myself up for it if I didn't do anything, so you could say I did it to preserve my sanity."

"Still. You're a good big brother, Rex. Today, with Vaughn… he was really scared. But he looked to you for surety and comfort. That should give you some encouragement about who you are as a captain, a brother, and a friend."

This made the blond flush up to his ears. He ducked his head bashfully. "Eh, uh-uhm… th-thank you."

She ruffled his short hair, "Anytime."

Rex sighed and let her stroke his head. It felt… nice. "I watch you do this with others a lot. Wondered why you did it. Now I know why."

"Hmm, I'm glad you like it. I used to do this with my youngest brother at home. He was a touchy feely kid. Still is, honestly. He sees a potential cuddler and attaches himself like a suction cup with super glue. He used to love it when I'd do this."

Rex hummed, agreeing with the little boy he'd never known.

"You're tired," she whispered.

He groaned, "Jedi mind tricks don't work on me."

"You are tired. There are a hundred nights of dark circles under your eyes."

"Mmm, leave me alone."

"Rex… you're exhausted."

He sighed. "Okay, fine. I'm tired. What now?"

Ella grinned triumphantly. "Well I have an extra bunk above my bed, and I don't snore."

Rex shook his head, "Sorry, Ella, but if you don't snore, I won't sleep. I'm used to hearing the boys snoring like tanks."

"Ok. I'll make snoring sounds until you do!" She began fake-snoring, and Rex shook his head, chuckling.

"You're ridiculous."

"Well so are you. You need sleep; you're the captain. Can't have you walking into pipes again—"

"It was one time! In the dark!" he protested, crossing his arms childishly.

Ella grinned, "Uh huh. But it won't be if you are so sleep deprived that you walk into everything. In front of your men. Maybe even Cody."

Rex shook his head, "Fine. You win. But I'm going to my own bed or you'll be up all night snoring for me. Don't think I don't know you."

Ella raised her hands in surrender. "Fine. Just watch where you're going."

Rex stood, swayed a little, and walked out the door.

Thud!

Ella giggled.

"I hate you."

•~§~•

Echo was so confused. Why was she hurt? What did he do?

I must've done something. But what? She kissed my cheek! I can't exactly mess up receiving a kiss on the cheek. It's not like I can kiss back or anything.

Rex staggered into the medbay, weaving a little as he walked.

Echo chuckled, "You okay, vod?"

"Shaddup, Echo," his captain growled, collapsing onto the cot right next to him.

"You're tired," Echo observed.

"Well done, genius. You solved the mystery."

Echo laughed, "You're grumpy too."

"You sound like her."

"Who?"

Rex rolled over to face him, fixing him with a withering scowl. "Who do you think, wise guy? Ella!"

"You talked to Ella?" he asked.

He nodded, "I saw her run into her room crying, so I followed her."

Echo frowned, "What did I do, Rex? I have no idea what made her so upset! I just sat there!"

"Exactly."

"Huh?"

Rex sighed, grumbling, "I hate being the go between. It's so stressful. You need to kiss her and move on with it. If you haven't started looking for a ring, I'm going to be devastated."

"Seriously, Rex. How did me sitting there make her cry?" Echo repeated, desperate.

"You didn't do anything intentionally," his big brother comforted. "She misunderstood you freezing up out of happy shock to be you freezing up out of disgust."

Echo smacked his forehead, "Oh, kriffing hells! I'm such a di'kut!"

Rex chuckled, "Tell me something I don't know. But it isn't really your fault, Echo. No one ever did that before so it's not unnatural to kinda… have a brain explosion."

"It was."

Rex just smirked. "I'm sure."

Echo sighed, "Eh… um, Rex?"

"Yeah?"

He squirmed, "Uh… can you… would you…? I mean, if you don't want to, it's fine, but—"

"For the love of cinnamon muffins, please just say it, Echo! If I don't want to I'll tell you."

"... can you cuddle with me?"

It was so quiet that Rex barely heard it. But he smiled and clambered into his brother's cot, pulling his own blanket with him so they'd be a little warmer.

"You're wearing armor, vod. It's spiky."

Rex huffed and sat up, shedding his scales hurriedly before slipping back under the blankets and wrapping his arms around Echo.

"Thanks Rex," the younger clone mumbled.

"Anytime."

Echo burrowed his face I think Rex's chest, "Love you, ori'vod."

"Love you too, vod'ika." Rex replied, a warm feeling in his chest.

All was quiet as around them their brothers settled in, a few cuddle piles heaped upon and in between the cots. Snores were rising. Echo could easily locate Hardcase by his earth-shaking roars.

A few minutes later,

"Rex?"

"Hngh?"

"Women are so confusing."

"Preach."

•~§~•

Ella sat in Senator Amidala's suite, her hands shaking around the warm cup of tea cradled in them. She was still rather on edge after the events of the last hour.

The Zillo Beast was dead. While she was sorry for the loss of life, she was thankful it hadn't done more damage. A lot of people could've died tonight.

Padme, Ahsoka, Skywalker, and his master were all talking in the other room about something. She wasn't sure what.

Ella stood up from where she'd been curled up on the couch, wrapping the blanket around her tighter as she padded out to the balcony.

The city lights twinkled up at her like stars. If only she could see the real ones that were masked in the night sky by the intense brightness Coruscant emitted.

She closed her eyes, feeling a faint breeze whispering through her hair. She missed home a lot tonight. A whole lot. Home where she could lift her eyes and see the stars as if the sky was a crystal looking glass. Home where the leaves were changing on the trees she and her brothers climbed, walking to the ground to be crunched under their feet as they stomped about, enjoying the autumn weather. Where in a few months, it would be snowy and white, like a bride prepared for her wedding, then spring when new life would be born. She missed it so much.

The familiar, clipping tap of plastoid boots alerted her to someone's timid approach.

"Ella… are you alright?"

The girl turned a little to give Echo a trembly smile, then turned back to watching the city as he came to a parade rest alongside her.

"The city looks kind of nice at night from way up high," he murmured. "I confess this is the first time I've seen it from this high since we first came to Coruscant with the 501st."

Ella rested her elbows on the parapet, her chin pillowed on her hands. "What was it like?"

"Like I was seeing my purpose and my greatest sorrow all in one," he replied softly.

"Why?"

He rested his hand atop her arm. "Because it represents the Republic. I was bred to defend it at all costs, to lay down my life for it." His voice was grave, "And it's my greatest sorrow because that's all I'm allowed to be, and I want more."

Ella turned to him, searching his face for a clue of what this 'more' entailed.

He continued, "The regs are clear. I'm to never take my mind off of the war for an instant. Never wish for more. Never pursue more, with anything or anyone."

Ella gulped, her dark eyes shimmering like glass as mist gathers.

"But I don't care."

What?

Ella's face snapped to his, hope and fear warring in her heart. What is he saying?

Echo took off his helmet and set it on the ground, taking both her hands in his, holding them as if they were priceless masterpieces that could fall apart at any moment.

"Ella…" he breathed, his smile shy but true. "I-I don't care what the regs say, or the senate, or even the Jedi. I don't care that I'm supposed to never dare to dream because I've broken that rule." He chuckled, "Fives would be shocked. But I mean it. I mean what I'm gonna say."

Echo lifted his hand to brush her hair behind her ear, his gloved fingers clumsy but gentle.

"I love you."

Ella gasped, and the mist turned to rain, and the first drops washed down her face.

I'm dreaming. I'll wake up and it'll be just a dream, she dreaded.

But he said it again, "I love you, Ella. Vheh a'oatr. I love you so much it scares me. I've never felt anything like this before. It's like I'm tied to you by an invisible lifeline. The distance pulls and tugs and hurts, and I want to be close to you. I want everything I feel to be near and in my hands, and real for us. I want you to feel the love I have for you and never doubt it."

Ella could barely breathe. His words were running circles in her head, whirling around so fast they were dizzying. Finally a few words sunk in.

I love you. Never doubt it. I love you so much it scares me.

Echo was quiet, his eyes hopeful, agony and affection in a lover's embrace as he waited patiently - so patiently - to hear the verdict. Would she pull him closer or rip his lifeline from her and leave him to drown alone?

Ella couldn't find her words. It was all too wonderful, she couldn't find anything to say that would explain all that she had kept for him, safe and sound and burning out of control. How do you describe the heat of a thousand stars and the pain of a thousand bullets with mere words? How do you express a breath of air after hours of clawing for the surface, or an anguish that doesn't cause torment but unrelenting devotion, and yearning for everything all at once?

Trembling fingers reached up and caressed his cheek, sliding back to his neck. Then she stood on her tiptoes and fell forward, into his arms, her face rising as he bent down.

And it was light and water and honey, bursting like a crescendo born from nothing into forever. Her spine turned to liquid and she melted into him, clutching at the chinks in his armor to anchor herself to him.

This was real, and pure and true. This was her life in reality, her most sacred dream coming to fruition.

His hands clutched at her delicate white nightgown, pulling her close, closer to him, as if he wanted to fuse with her permanently. Echo's lips tasted like butter and sugar and fresh air, and she couldn't get enough, coming back for more before could even part from him.

Necessity demanded that she breathe, and she fell on his shoulder, her face burrowed into his neck, and her hand resting upon his hammering heart. She murmured it into his shoulder.

"What?" he panted, unable to hear her breathless voice.

She lifted her face to look at him, tears of joy sparkling in her eyes and her freshly-kissed lips smiling adoringly.

"I love you, Echo."

That was all she could say before he devoured her again.

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Mando'a Translations

Vod - brother.

Di'kut - idiot.

Ori'vod - big brother.

Vod'ika - little brother.

Vheh A'oatr - Earth Angel

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