At the Margins
Margin (n): 1: the part of a page outside the main body of printed or written matter; 2: edge
Marginal (adj.): 4: excluded from or existing outside the mainstream of society or a group
Marginalize (vb.): to relegate to an unimportant position within a society or group
-The Merriam-Webster Dictionary, 6th ed. (2004)
Dear Diary,
Ridley just found out about the tiers. Now, my phone is off the hook with prank calls from him. The last thing I need is my sworn enemy mocking me for being 8th place. Compounded with the prejudice I've faced for being a woman and a bounty hunter, along with the snickering audience and the "better-than-you" treatment shown to me by some of the higher tiers (you know who you are). Seeing them so full of it makes me want to fire a fully-loaded Charge Shot into their midst, to obliterate them like the deadly Space Pirates I've battled in the past. But luckily, I'm not riding this roller coaster alone. I've found confiding buddies in DK, Ness, Link and Luigi. Speaking of Luigi, he's become our unofficial "voice", our spine, our superstructure keeping us from falling apart. So, anyone who wants to [bleep] with us has to go through him.
I'm hitting the Training Area now; this energy and aggression is driving me mad!
Samus A.
Dear Diary,
THANK YOU LUIGI, YOU ARE THE BEST! I SHOWER YOU WITH COCONUT CREAM PIES!
DK
Dear Diary,
Captain Falcon and Fox used to enjoy playing baseball with me. Not anymore. They say that it's "for little babies", just like playing Twister "is for casuals". I've never heard such disrespectful comments in my life! Why, oh why, does this tier list corrupt them so?
I'm sitting in my room, playing with my yo-yo, trying not to cry, thinking about the way we were. Smash used to be one, big, happy family—now, we're arranged like a totem pole. The likes of Fox and Falcon behave like socialites who are oh-so-special and oh-so-important above the rest of us. And us C tiers? We're treated like low-class peasants, like expendables, like underlings of the lowest order, like useless, easily replaced and erased individuals. We're kindergarteners and first graders, and they're the big sixth graders who love tormenting us—or so they think.
Thank God for Luigi. His words ring in my head as I write these words. He may be last, but he's no underling! And he's right—we are going to show everyone what C tiers are made of and set this tournament on fire! The things I'm going to do to those snobbish pushovers—
I'll get back to you later. Luigi's coming to visit!
Ness
Dear Diary,
You know that feeling when you accidentally disturb a flock of Cuccos, and they won't stop assailing you? Well, that's how things are like right now for me.
Eleventh—how could they have the nerve? Eleventh! I am the Hero of Time. I am the bearer of the Triforce of Courage. I serve and protect Hyrule with my life. What have I done? What have I done to be so grossly disregarded? Why do these people keep harassing me like a flock of Cuccos? I'm being pecked at from all directions. From one direction comes two fighters in particular who think they're VIPs now (I won't name names, but they know who they are) and seek to remind us of our place, so to speak. From another are the gamers, the tournament regulars who drone on and on about how lousy I am. And then, I've got the audience breathing down my neck, waiting to see me fail, fall, die trying. Just think of the libel and slander they're sending to Hyrule, to my people! In spite of everything I've done, in spite of all of my accomplishments, they thumb their noses at my fighting abilities. Just wait until I've sharpened my Master Sword, polished my Boomerang and restock my Bombs. I'll have them eating their words in no time!
I'll go play my ocarina now.
Link
P.S. Luigi told me that he's swinging by later. I'm going to hold him to that.
Dear Diary,
I've cried my last tears. I've pulled myself out of the rut of what-if and what-could've-been. I've stopped stewing over that piece of paper; I've decided that it's not going to rule my life. Instead, I've declared all-out total war on it. It's placed a value stamp on me, but I'm going to fight it. I'm going to fight it with my bare hands. I'm going to fight it with words. I'm going to fight it with thoughts and ideas and energy and fire. I'm going to roll up my sleeves and get in the mud, because if they want to drag me through filth, I'll take them right along with me. I feel a wind beginning to blow inside of me, a full-force gale. Let me tell you, this gale within me is going to blow down these negative perceptions of me with the relentlessness of a hurricane. I am a hurricane. A hurricane steadily increasing in deadly power. Now I can hardly sit still. I cannot wait for the next match. I cannot wait for my next opponent. I hope it's Falcon or Fox, two new friends of mine who screwed me over on a dime. They want to believe they're the cream of the crop, but I'll knock them down a few pegs, just you wait. I am a category 5 superstorm of a hurricane, and my target is locked on those two.
They'd better say their prayers.
Luigi
Dear Diary,
Oh, God, I feel so happy right now! So free! I haven't felt so lightweight since I defeated Ridley for the first time and reached closure over losing my parents. What happened? Well, let me tell you. Luigi came into my room earlier, armed with a home-cooked meal. I knew he was planning something, because it was nothing but comfort food. I'm talking about a four-course meal. Antipasti, the pasta dish, the second dish and finally the dessert. Luigi did an excellent job of cheering me up. I'm now immune to Ridley's verbal jabs. And full.
God bless you, Luigi!
Samus A.
Dear Diary,
Luigi's the total package! Nuff said!
DK
Dear Diary,
Luigi broke out Chutes and Ladders for us to play. Chutes and Ladders! I love that game! After playing a few rounds of that, I was less angry. I felt ready to put my cards on the table, and I did just that. I told him about the temptations in my head, the feeling of being a helpless little kid, the connotations dropped onto my shoulders. He said that he's struggled with similar thoughts and temptations, but now he's wrangled them. I didn't even have to ask him for advice—he dispensed it for free. He's planning a sleepover tonight, and Samus, DK and Link already decided to come. I'll come, too.
Once I laid everything bare, the two of us went outside and played basketball. Truly, I've never asked for a better buddy than Luigi.
Ness
Dear Diary,
Sorry I was in such a funk earlier. But never again, never again! Luigi and I understand each other. We're the Green Team, for crying out loud—the freaking Green Team! While I was playing my ocarina, Luigi walked in and listened. After I was done playing tunes, we chatted each other up for a while. I don't know why, but the fact that he wears green, like me, makes him a lighthouse, guiding the small boat of my mind back home. I'm still Hyrule's protector; still the bearer of the Triforce of Courage. I still ride proudly astride Epona, demonstrate my swordsmanship with my Master Sword, and I'm still masterful at projectile warfare. Navi remains to give me guidance. I've received fan letters from gamers as well as the people of Hyrule. But by far, the one to still the storm within my heart is Luigi, my partner in green. We're unbreakable, Luigi and I. And we never have and never will run from a fight.
I thank you, Luigi, with all of my heart.
Link
Dear Diary,
My four newest compadres are here with me now—Samus, DK, Ness and Link. We have come together as one force, as one voice, five fires merging into a wild inferno. From now on, none of us will travel alone, and none of us will jump ship. Whatever happens, we'll brave it together. We are our last, our best, our only line of defense. We are the light returning to the darkness. We are the Fierce Five.
Luigi
Do you hear the people sing, singing the song of angry men?
It is the music of the people who will not be slaves again!
When the beating of your heart matches the beating of the drums,
There's a new hope about to start when tomorrow comes!
-"Song of Angry Men", Les Miserables
To my guest reviewers:
Jack: Thank you so much! Some of my origins come from the Nintendo canon. The bit about the plumbing business comes from the Super Mario Bros. Super Show (RIP Lou Albano and Danny Wells). This chapter really shows Luigi's strength, so I hope it doesn't disappoint.
Guest04: Have you heard of the musical group Tears for Fears? They had some pretty good stuff back in the 80s. Furthermore, I'm not a tier fanatic, all right? I'm just interested on the psychology and sociology of the tier list.
Monkey999Boy: I can never imagine Kirby being a braggart. He's always friendly, trusting and bubbly (possibly a reason why he got played so easily by Magolor and Marx, but that's another story). Though Kirby is old enough to understand the positive connotations of being first, he knows that it doesn't entitle him to special privileges. And what better way to get people together than ice cream? Kirby does like food. As for Luigi's post, I think it's going to get some positive attention, likely by "the fans eagerly awaiting his appearance". Thank you for reading.
Please review, and stay tuned.
