Kronos Unveiled: Resurgence
Warning: Spoilers for LiR2016 ahead! Read through Ch. 14 of that story to better understand this chapter.
Seventeen years later
Master Hand was seated at his desk, gazing sternly at the seven Smashers seated before him. Time had slowed down for him since he, accompanied by his brother, Crazy Hand and their father, Master Core, had sneaked a peak at Luigi's laptop computer. The reason? A bullying pandemic had erupted on Miiverse, Nintendo's social networking site, with Luigi as the primary target. By skimming over Luigi's profile, Master had hoped to gain not only closure but also an insight to why Luigi reacted so—violently—to his tormentors.
Instead, Master, Crazy and MC had made a startling discovery.
Luigi's Miiverse posts, translated from Italian, held so much anguish to them. The presence of all caps, exclamation marks and italics had prompted the trio to input the translate command. Who knew that the quiet and timid Mario Bro could use such strong language in his posts? After viewing some particularly angsty posts from the Brawl era, which bore semblance to Luigi's first "true power", MC postulated that such online venting dated back even further. And he was correct.
One by one, Master Hand read all of Luigi's spirited, aggressive and blistering blog posts from 1999, observing that this tone wasn't present until the day he put the tier list up. He'd waged an all-out war against that piece of paper, attacking it as an underhanded scheme to fray the bonds of friendship between the Smashers and to establish a "pecking order" which would govern their daily lives. Each word punched Master Hand in the heart as he remembered seeing the expression on Luigi's face change from excitement to disbelief and finally devastated outrage when he saw the tier list, walking in on him crying and pounding the walls of his room, seeing him light into his opponents during his matches and hearing violent sobs and scribbling sounds. He'd wished to God he'd talked to Luigi, but since he was being so strong for Samus, DK and Link—
He'd never forget one particular post as long as he lived. It was the first tier list itself, an exact copy of it, with a thick, diagonal black line slashed through each slot on the S through B tiers. He'd left his fellow C-tiers alone, but he'd marked his own brother and the adorable puffball from Dreamland! Being last place must've really damaged Luigi. Looking at that post and reflecting on past events, Master knew there was no question—the bullying had to start with that list. After calling a meeting, confronting the Smashers on who and who didn't participate in the harassment and announcing the temporary shutdown of Miiverse, he'd summoned Pikachu, Kirby, Captain Falcon, Fox, Yoshi, Jigglypuff and Mario to his office, hoping to find out if they'd done something, inadvertently or not, to set Luigi off.
"I appreciate you seven coming down here," Master Hand said once the seven were situated.
"Mamma mia," shuddered Mario. "I'm really starting to feel like we're in trouble."
"Poyo?" questioned Kirby.
"No, Kirby. This isn't about how you frequently raid the pantry," said MH.
"Master Hand, can you please tell us what's going on?" asked Mario.
"In the court of law, you're innocent until proven guilty, and that's no different here," MH began, "so, no matter what you hear about Smash and Miiverse becoming a hideout for cyberbullies, trolls and the like, there's no reason to fret—unless, of course, you have something to hide."
"I've got a date with all-you-can-eat lobster tails, Master Hand," Fox broke in. "What exactly does this have to do with us?"
"The answer lies in this piece of paper." And with a snap of his fingers, MH unveiled the first tier list.
The room exploded into chaos. Projectiles arced across the room and assailed the tier list amidst a chorus of boos, hoots, whistles and catcalls.
"POYOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"FALCON—CRINGE!"
"JIGGLYYYYYYYYY!"
"YOSHIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!"
"PIKAAAA!"
"Mamma F—er!"
"Oh, dear God, no!"
"Everybody settle down," said MH. "I know that this wasn't—and still isn't—very popular."
"Yeah, you think?" snapped Fox. "This is bringing back some unwanted memories!"
MH gave the vulpine a pointed look. "Unwanted memories, you say? Out of guilt, perhaps?"
Falcon continued to cringe. "My eyes! My eyes!"
"Oh, come on; it's not that bad," grumbled MH.
Kirby buried himself against Mario's chest, muffling his tiny "poyo"-ing.
"What in Star's name does—that—have to do with anything?!" Mario demanded of MH as he sought to comfort the Star Warrior.
"I now have reason to believe that this lovely piece of paper was the root of all this nonsense," explained MH.
"Miiverse didn't exist back then!" objected Douglas. "All we had was dial-up and blogging!"
"I'm not just talking about the current situation," MH revealed. "Based on my observations, as soon as I put up this thing, tension arose among the fighters. One of my Smashers has complained of being constantly teased over his placement on this list. And this is what he's done to it."
MH snapped his fingers again, revealing the copy he'd found on Luigi's old blog page, everyone from the S tier to the B tier slashed through with a black marker.
Immediately, the silence erupted into curses, yells, blasphemes, questions and exclamations of "Yoshi", "Pika" and "Poyo".
Mario raised his voice, silencing his companions. "Well, wasn't this expected?!" he challenged. "Don't you think that maybe the tier list was some sort of tricked-out conspiracy to encourage competitive, and dare I say hostile, attitudes among us?! On the first day, we could hardly wait to know each other! Sure, we were beating each other up, but after the battles were done for the day, we genuinely enjoyed each other's company. But then that tier list showed up, and that was when something really went awry in the happy-go-lucky world of Nintendo! Mamma mia! I'm glad it's gone!
"Well, that makes two of us," MH stated briskly. "Make that three of us, since the Smasher in question had made a similar accusation against it, minus the conspiracy part."
Mario rubbed his temples. "Look, B tier isn't boast-worthy, all right? Jiggs and I can testify to that. And furthermore—why do you think one of us would do something like that?"
"Well, whoever did this would think so," MH shot back. "What else explains the obvious determination to beat you all?"
"Master Hand, we've all had our bad days," interjected Falcon, "but this…"
"I've also observed that the higher-ranked ones grew cocky for a while. It was fine to be happy over your rankings, but most of you took that to the extreme, and it took some embarrassing moments to cure you of your overconfidence."
"Hold up—are you calling us bullies?!" balked Fox. "Who do you think you are?!"
"Gee, you're one to talk," Mario said to him, "seeing your behavior in Melee, Mr. 20XX!"
"Mario, I assure you, those days are behind me," sighed Fox.
"That's because you got nerfed," shrugged Jiggs.
"Yeah, and because I noticed how I was pushing you guys away," said Fox.
"Hmm, sound familiar?" asked Mario.
Falcon shifted his feet as the memories came back to him. "Well—whoever did this was obviously in the C tier," he said finally.
Mario swiveled toward him. "Well, whoever did this obviously couldn't catch a break from it," he said, the edge in his voice cutting like a razor. He brushed Master Hand away as he tried to calm him. "Whoever did this was obviously teased, mocked, shamed, demoralized and dehumanized on a daily basis. Whoever did this was obviously considered useless and worthless. Whoever did this obviously had a boatload of pent-up frustration inside of him."
"Poyo, poyo, poyo!" Kirby chimed in.
Pikachu stared at the floor. "Pika," he murmured.
Mario scratched Pikachu behind the ears. "You have nothing to worry about. There wasn't any tension between you two until Melee, and you managed to get past that."
MH was frozen. "W-wait. How—how did you know…?"
Jumpman jumped to his feet. "Because I saw it happen! Because I tried to do something about it! And you have the gall to stand there and accuse me of harassing my own brother because of some stupid piece of paper?!"
"Mario, calm down at once!" ordered MH. "I'm not accusing you of anything! I'm giving you a chance to confess before the truth surfaces on its own!"
The red-capped hero sank back into his chair and spread his hands. "Aside from the occasional sibling rivalry and playfully competitive spirit—I've got nothing to hide," he said. "I apologize for my outburst. I…"
"We'll discuss that later," MH broke in.
"Yoshi," Yoshi said softly.
"He's right. He'd never hurt his 'mama'," Mario said softly.
"Even if we did let it get to our heads, he eventually forgave us," said Fox.
"Yeah! As you can see, we're as thick as thieves now!" added Falcon.
"Poyo!" chirped Kirby.
"No, you were never one of them," smiled Mario, hugging Kirby.
"C'mon, M—that puffball didn't know what it was," eyerolled Fox.
Kirby glared. "Poyo, poyo!"
"He knew enough to know what being kicked to the bottom meant," Mario put in.
"Trust us, Master Hand," summed up Falcon. "We'd never harm a hair on his head."
MH wasn't so sure…
The glove lined them up in a small room, Pikachu first, Mario last. Each held a sign with a number from one to seven, denoting their positions on the first tier list. MH set up the equipment as the seven protested.
"What are we doing here? I feel like a criminal!" yelled Fox.
"This won't take long," MH assured them. "Now, starting with Pikachu, I want you all to step forward and say something. Anything. It's that simple."
Pikachu scampered forward with an adorable "Pika-pika!" and a wave.
Kirby puffed forward a few times. "Hii!" he said, waving his appendages.
Captain Falcon strode forwards, saluted and said, "Show me ya moves!"
Fox was next. "Do a barrel roll!" he exclaimed.
Yoshi shuffled forward with a "Yoshi, Yoshi!"
Jiggs took a few puffs forward and warbled, "Puff! Jigglypuff!"
At last, Mario strode forward, hopped up and landed in a strongman pose. "Here we go!" he interjected.
"Thank you. Now, smile!"
The seven held up their placards and posed as MH snapped a few photos of them. When he was satisfied, he said, "We'll continue this investigation tomorrow. But for now, you are dismissed. Mario—I'm gonna need your help."
"Of course," said Mario.
As the seven made their exit, they knew that although things had changed in the course of seventeen years, time didn't heal all wounds…
Please R&R.
