Aint got shit to do so let, us, start, the shooooooooooow!
[obligatory mention of unowning of Zelda intensifies.]
The hike up the mountain was uneventful. Aside from some more cyclops bugs("How many arachnids did those goddesses need on this planet!?") Navi identified as Tektites, the hike was painful for Dylan. The Kokiri's outfit aired out most of the heat, but most of it hit him in the face like a mobster looking for cash.
"Now I know how Frodo felt." Dylan stated, wringing out his cap. He was pretty sure he saw some evaporate.
Navi was sent flying from the cap. She shook herself off. "How do those Goron's stay up here?"
"Thick fat." A noise came. Turning around, they saw the noise came from a rock
"What in the-"
"Oh, sorry. Hold on a sec." the rock began to shake, as a pair of arms grew from it, then legs it rose up on, a full 6 feet. The creature had nostrils like a pig but not a nose, short blond hair with a slight goatee. It looked fat and had ear holes, along with two tattoos on it's arms of a rhombus and 3 triangles. It's back had jagged rocks zig zagging along. He had a humongous backpack strapped to him, and a black beanie with gauze wrapped around his fists.
"Hey there, I'm Toma" he said, holding out his hand the size of Dylan's face.
"Ditto, mountain man." he replied, shocked and shaking back.
"I'm a Goron, if ya' didn't know."
"Yeah we got that." Navi said.
"What are ya' here for? The Hylians don't come up here much except to visit, so you must be here for Goron City."
"As a matter of fact, yes, we do need to go there. Can you lead u-AHHHHHH!" All of a sudden, Toma grabbed Dylan and wrapped himself around him like a blanket.
Then he rolled.
"AHHHHHH! GET ME OFF THIS CRAZY THING! ER, GUY!" he yelled. 5 more minutes and he would have vomited all over the Goron's stomach, but he uncurled himself and stood up.
"Welcome to Goron City." he said, holding his arms out in flourish. After Dylan picked himself up,(and blew chunks in the corner) he finally saw Goron city.
Either the Construction Workers they hired were drunk 24/7, or the Goron's were made of mid-life crisis aunts trying to spruce up their house, because this place was unique. It was made up of three floors, each descending with cliffs. At the top floor, the one Dylan was at, a suspension bridge of rope linked toward a wheel of wood in the middle, the size of a car. Other Goron roamed around, some having their Goatees fully grown, and baby Goron with no hair at all.
"Make yourself at home, bro! The ceremony is about to begin!" and before Dylan could ask what the ceremony was about, Toma rolled away.
"Welp, let's go see what's up with these guys." Dylan suggested to Navi, who eagerly agreed.
First, they decided to check what was up with the platform in the middle, so Dylan found out a fact about himself; he's pretty decent at tightroping. When he got there, a Goron shouted at him that he shouldn't be up there, and then when questioned about the Spiritual Stone, he said something about 'Big Brother' taking it away because of what happened. When asked what happened, he curled back into a ball.
He went around on the lower floors, searching for a Goron that would tell him what happened, they all refused to tell him. They finished talking to the final one on the bottom floor, who only gave them a brief clue; Dodongo's Cavern. Even Navi didn't know what he ment.
"Man, these guys are acting like a bunch of chumps. They're more scared than a Skull Kid when an 18 year old walks in the room!"
"Have you realized all these guys are dudes? I haven't seen a single female since I got on this mountain."
BWWWOOOOOORRR!
"What is that?"
"Either a war horn just sounded or the shit's these guys take must be more painful than the time I had to pass those kidney stones."
"What're those?"
"Hell on earth."
Walking towards the horn, the sounds of cheer rose up from the last floor. Hopping down, a sea of Goron's were cheering in delight, clapping and whistling.
"Huh. This must be the ceremony." Dylan said, sitting on a rock and getting a better view. A stage was set up with booking flowers decorating it. A Goron stepped onto stage, clearing his throat.
"Welcome to the Goron Extracurricular Activity Ceremony, where many of you get to show off your skills. Unfortunately, as you know, Big Brother Darunia won't be able to join us this year, as he has stayed in his room since last week, and since Dodongo's Cavern was sealed, and since he took the Goron's Ruby. But enough about that, we're here to show skills! Let me hear you scream!" The Gorons that once had their heads down sulking and staring towards a room all erupted into cheers.
"Alright, I've had enough. Time to go meet this Big Brother guy." he left Navi watching the show and stomped towards the door the Goron's were glancing at. He knocked on it. No answer. He knocked again. Still no answer.
"HEY! DARUNIA! LET ME IN! YOU GOT SOMETHING I WANT!" the sound of the crowd drowned out the voice that boomed back!
"Go away, stranger! I have nothing to do with you. I am waiting for the Royal Family's messenger!"
"Oh, great. That just so happens to be me. NOW LET ME THE FUCK IN!"
"Don't try and fool me! If you were with the Royal Family, you would-" The noise of Zelda's Lullaby cut him off, Dylan almost playing more of it before the door slid open. He dove through the room in case it closed again. It didn't. Standing up, once again felt a tingle down his spine as standing over him, was the Patriarch of the Goron.
Every other Goron was at least 6 feet, some 7. Darunia was almost touching the ceiling at a whopping 8 feet. His beard and hair collided together into an explosion of star shaped hair. His muscles and veins flexed with every breath he took, and the gauze wrapped around his ankles and wrists pushed, trying to break free.
Darunia sneered down at Dylan. "What. Is. This. I ask for somebody to help us with our problems, and they send a little boy. Me and the king are supposed to be Sworn Brothers, and this is how he treats me!" Darunia (whose hand was the size of his WHOLE BODY) picked Dylan and roared in his face; "GET THE HECK OUT OF MY FACE, BOY!"
Dylan struggled to get out of Darunia's grasp and managed to free an arm and point it at him.
"Calm the hell down, man. Why are you so angry? Everybody else is having a good time!" Darunia grimaced, then sighed and placed Dylan down.
"Us Goron's eat rocks, it's what we do. The main one's we got were from Dodongo's Cavern. The Dodongo's there were peaceful, and we co-existed in peace, with us gathering rocks from their home."
"Wait, there are rocks literally everywhere. Why not just eat these?" He picked up a sizable rock off the floor and presented it to Darunia. Taking it, he popped in his mouth like a candy and swallowed it.
"That was the equivalent of spoiled milk to you Hylians." Dylan began to correct him, but Darunia was already Talking again.
"Then, only a week ago, a man dressed in dark armor showed, and threatened us to give up the Goron's Ruby, the Spiritual Stone of Fire." Dylan's ears perked. "Ganondorf." he whispered.
"When we refused, he killed Queen Dodongo, which sent all the other Dodongo's into hysterics. Then he blocked the cavern and disappeared. We tried to tell the king about it, but he claimed we were lying. Fearing that the man would come back, I hid the Goron's Ruby away, and the light that shone across the city was now gone." finished with his story, Darunia turned around and folded his arms.
"And that is all I shall tell you, stranger. This is a Goron problem and we don't need kid meddling in our business.
Dylan frowned and stalked towards Darunia. "Hey, I'm trying to get that guy to not take over the kingdom. And you have to stop being a baby and help, and-" Darunia turned sharply, casting a side eye at Dylan that could melt bones. He stood ridged for a moment, then turned and walked away, the sliding door staying open.
"Stupid Darunia, stupid Gorons, big and dumb Ganondorf, mutter, mutter…" He walked back to where Navi was. A Goron had finished his talent, balancing 20 balls on his head, and a new act was about to begin.
"Oh man you should have seen it, Dylan! There was this, and that, and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah-" He rolled his eyes and shrugged as Navi rattled on.
"And for our next star, the amazing, the spectacular, Saki!" The Gorons cheered the loudest Dylan heard him. In fact, the name Saki reminded him of something.
"Psst, Navi, do we know any Saki?"
"SHH! It's starting!"
The curtains parted, and out stepped Saki. Immediately, Dylan knew he was a Kokiri. He had the traditional Kokiri outfit along with various other materials stitched to it like something Frankenstien would make. Blond hair drooped down in such a way he could only describe as 'emo'. His Kokiri cap was shorter than Dylan's, only reaching his neck.
"All right party people!" The crowd roared, a small Goron being held by another cried, "I LOVE YOU SAKI!"
"I know I left you all a while back, but I'm home, home, home! Right here in Goron City. But you don't want to hear that. You wanna hear my beautiful voice, right?" The crowd roared with exclamation. "That's what I thought! And celebrating my return back to the Home of the Goron, I'm gonna sing the first song I ever sang to you guys! You ready?!" The crowd cheered once more. Dylan couldn't help but clap. Saki was a crowd pleaser. Then it came to him. He had stayed in his house back at Kokiri Forest. And before he could question it, Saki let loose a song.
If it hadn't been for Cotton-Eye Joe.
I'd been married a long time ago.
Where did you come from, where did you go?
Where did you come from, Cotton-Eye Joe?
"Oh, hey I heard this song before!"
"What d'ya mean you've heard it before, it's brand new!" Navi said, bopping her head along to it. The Goron's were clapping along, making their downbeat where there was none. Saki scanned the crowd, shouting encouragement and waving his arms until he found Dylan. He seemed to stare at him for a second before reaching out his hand.
"How'd you like to be my partner for tonight, huh?" Dylan shrugged and reached out and grabbed his hand, climbing on stage. Navi was squealing like a Star Trek fan girl. Saki started singing again with Navi helping. Dylan didn't immediately start singing, only dancing, but just like Navi, he only needed a little bit of coaxing,(and jeering from the crowd)to sing with everyone.
He came to town like a midwinter storm
He rode through the fields, so handsome and strong
His eyes were his tools and his smile was his gun
But all he had come for was having some fun!
"If it hadn't been for Cotton-Eyed Joe, I'd been- hold on! I got the perfect thing for this!" Whipping out his Ocarina, Dylan provided to play Saria's Song, which made Skai even more hype.
"Yeah, Nostalgia! That's music to my ears." The Kokiri cried before jumping into the crowd and started crowd surfing. The Gorons cheered as Dylan played louder, Navi flying around the stage creating a one-fairy light show. It was the definition of an absolute banger. Go look up 'Awesome' in a dictionary right now. Find it? Yeah, a picture of this took up the whole page.
He continued to play Saria's Song, more notes coming to them, even though he had never heard them before. Suddenly, a deep rumbling came from Darunia's room. He stepped out in all his glory, tapping his foot. The other Goron's stopped cheering for a moment to see their leader. It, However, seemed like he didn't notice them as in a single bound, he leaped over the crowd and landed on stage.
Then he started to dance. Ok, maybe it wasn't dancing. It was more like a very controlled form of waving your arms, and Darunia was the master of it.
"Yes! OH! OH! OH! Yes! What a hot beat!" it was at this point Dylan had to make a decision. He could either:
Stop and avoid getting crushed
Sprint away from Goron City, Death Mountain, and Hyrule itself.
Or, C, not do any of those and continue playing.
Dylan's a smart kid, right?
"Yeah, it's straight fire! YOU READY TO HEAR SOME MORE?!" all right, nevermind.
By now, the whole city was in civilized chaos. Saki was crowd surfing like a boss. Navi was giving at least 8 Gorons a seizure. Darunia was popping and locking like nobody was watching. And Dylan was in the center of it all, playing Saria's Song. But wait, you're probably not asking, where was Toma? That nice Goron from earlier must see this spectacle. He's here, don't get your tits in a twist.
Eventually, the Goron Extracurricular Activity Ceremony came to end. No other act could hold a candle to the concert. Darunia had called Dylan and Navi to his chamber. Saki had tagged along after signing autographs and Toma had come to greet Dylan after the show and followed him.
"Hey, Saki you're a Kokiri, right?" Dylan asked. Saki turned and nodded.
"Yup. Kokiri Forest born and raised, round' the Deku Tree where I spent most of my days."
"He's dead."
"Really? Damn, RIP. Such is the circle of life…"
"He died by a Parasitic Armored Arachnid."
"The circle of life comes in many different ways. Saw a Zora drown. A Zora. Drown!" Dylan groaned loudly as they entered Darunia's chamber.
"But Kokiri are supposed to die if they leave the forest!" Navi piped up. Saki shrugged.
"Eh. I left and I didn't die. So I became a STAR! I've performed in Castle Town, Zora's Domain, Goron City…and that's it."
"So the Great Deku Tree…was wrong?" Navi cast her head down to think. Saki shook his head.
"No, he lied." Darunia turned to them, facing away and dancing.
"That was a hot beat! Yes! My depression is cured! I must thank you Dylan."
"No problem, big man. I only ask for one reward; the Spiritual Stone of Fire." Dylan said slyly. Darunia's smile faltered.
"I...am afraid I cannot give it to you. Yes, you have helped me, but not enough. I have one more thing to ask you."
Dylan groaned. "Alright fine, what is it? As long as it give me the stone-"
"I must ask you to kill the monsters in Dodongo's Cavern." The brief silence gave Dylan time to think, and shrug.
"Fine. Give me the Spiritual Stone of Fire after, got it?" Darunia nodded fiercely.
"H-hold on a second! It's not the Dodongo's fault, the man in black armor caused this! They shouldn't have to suffer!" Toma proclaimed. Darunia sighed.
"What other choice do we have? Besides, I don't want you to kill all of them, just the King. Since the Queen is already dead, if you kill the King, that means the Dodongos will stop being violent and two can become the King and Queen. It's that simple." Toma frowned and muttered to himself. Dylan nodded and was about to sprint out the door before Darunia stopped him.
"Before you go, you'll need this." He reached behind his back and pulled out a bracelet. It looked like a miniature crown and had the Goron tattoo stamped on. He slid it on his sleeve and immediately felt his body pulse in tandem with his heart.
"That Goron Bracelet will help you carry Bomb-Flowers, which you'll need to get in the cave. They've been growing scarce though, and there's only one by the cave. So don't miss the boulder. I wish you luck on this quest, Dylan." He nodded and turned and left.
"Alright, let's go!" he said. He left the city and rounded a column of dirt and traveled down a set of chiseled out rocks in the shape of stairs. And there before him was the boulder. It was bigger than a building, and Dylan almost couldn't call it a boulder, more like a rouge Stonehenge monument.
"The bomb flower is right there." a voice behind him chimed, glancing, Toma and Saki stood next to each other.
"What do you guys want?" Dylan asked. Toma scratched the back of his head.
"I...I wanna help. If we don't solve this problem, the Gorons will go into extencion. I can't just sit on the sidelines. So, is it alright if I tag along?"
"Sure," Dylan shrugged, turning to Saki, "What about you, Elvis?"
He grinned. "I just wanna get inspiration for my next song, and this seems like the perfect way to do it." Dylan nodded and rushed over to the bomb flower. It looked like a bomb you'd see in cartoons, except the fuse was a long vane and leaves were wrapped around the bottom.
"How the hell am I supposed to light this thing?" he said, picking it up. As soon as he did, the vine sparked and caught on fire, shortening fast. Dylan immediately dropped it quick. It started to roll down the slope, away from the boulder and towards Kakariko Village.
"ACK! STOP IT!" he yelled, running after it. Saki backed away as Toma rolled into a ball. Lightning fast, he rolled down the and caught it. He turned around and chucked it, over Dylan's head, and straight at the boulder.
KABOOOOOM!
The explosion rocked Dylan's body and it almost swept him off his feet. Small fires died out as now, in its place was a dark hole, gaping like a mouth full of fangs, adding to the visage with stalactites and stalagmites. They all met up at the mouth, peering into the darkness.
"Welp, no time like the present." Saki said, and casually walked in. Dylan grinned and rushed after him, Toma hurrying behind. King Dodongo wouldn't know what hit him.
The first thing Dylan saw when he entered Dodongo's Cavern was a skeleton the size of a plane. It's ribs formed a chandelier and it's skull stood over the end of the cavern. Holes were blown into the walls from the Goron's mining efforts.
"That must be Queen Dodongo…" Toma muttered. Dylan felt his legs wobble. If the Queen was this big, how big would the king be?
"Where to?" Navi asked. Everybody shrugged. Dylan led the charge by walking in headfirst. A bigger room met them, bringing the gang closer to the skeleton. Up ahead another gigantic hole was blasted, big enough to fit all of them inside, right under the skeleton head.
"That's where!" Dylan cried as he leapt over jutting rocks and rising lava, landing in front of the door.
"WAIT! WATCH OUT FOR THE BEAMOS!" Navi crowd, as what seemed like statues opened their cyclopean eye and eerie mouths formed on their torso. Laser beams came from their eyes, almost scorching him in the process. He fired at their eyes with his Slingshot, thanking himself for not forgetting it. The beams stopped, but the Beamos still stood.
"Come on!" he screamed to the others. They all followed suit, right as the Beamos started their deadly light show. The hole in the wall lead to a room, with smaller holes in the wall and metal door leading to the left. A huge pit rested on the floor.
"This seems confeting." Saki said, stretching his legs. A small, 'Cheep!', stopped him. Turning around, he searched for the source of the noise before looking down. A reptilian looking worm with red eyes and a hard face wiggled up to him.
"AWWW! What's your name little fella?" Saki picked up the creature like a baby and tickled it's stomach.
"Saki, but it down! That's a Baby Dodongo! When they feel threatened, they-"Navi started to say, before the baby started to glow red. Saki dropped it down the pit in fear, and a second later, an explosion rang out from the pit.
"-explode." she finished. A rumbling sound came from the walls, and before anyone could say anything, dozens of Baby Dodongos poured from the holes, all glowing red. Dylan took his sword and used it as a golf club, pushing the creatures into the pit in the middle of the room. Toma stuck to grabbing them and tossing them in, while Saki kicked them. The room was soon cleared out, the only remains of the dodongos was the memory.
"Well, that was fun. Let's continue." Dylan said, pushing open the door. The room was huge, with multiple small islands floating along the boiling lava. In the middle, on the biggest island was a chest. Dylan immediately jumped towards it, despite the screams of his companions. Once he reached it, steel bars clamped down from the door, leaving Toms and Saki stranded while Dylan looked back.
"Watch out, Lizalfos!" Navi screamed. Dropping from the ceiling were a pair of anthropomorphic lizards, 6ft tall with armor and swords.
"Oh, they remind me of my pet lizard, Fluffler!" he said to Navi while he raised his sword. One of the Lizalfos tried to do a jump slash, but was blocked by Dylan. He rolled through the lizards legs and uppercutted him with his sword. It hissed at him and leaped back while the second one came at him from behind. Dylan felt him before he saw him as a tongue snapped towards him like a whip, hitting him in the back. He wavered on the edge, nearly toppling in the bubbling broth. He turned around quickly to execute a stab, but the Lizalfos jumped over him like a Kangaroo. He felt pain as a slash across his back sent him falling over. Ignoring the pain and focusing on the Lizalfos laughing, he shoulder bashed the monster, sending it to die in the lava.
He whipped around and fired the Slingshot at the other Lizalfos, sending his last Deku Seed into its eye, toppling it too straight into the lava. After it was over, Dylan winced as he felt the pain finally.
"Dylan, you're bleeding!" Navi chimed.
"I'm fine. Let's continue."
"But what about Saki and Toma?"
"Ah, they'll be fine. They seem competent."
"You are so incompetent!" Toma yelled at Saki who was busy shrugging and glaring. After the steel bars had blocked them from Dylan, the walls started to close in, and the only option was to fall down the hole, leading to a room with Keese. But these weren't normal Keese, these were Fire Keese, albino versions of the murderous bats that were engulfed in flames. While Toma had fought them off with his fits, leading to some painful blisters, Saki decided to fade into the background, leaving Toma too the problem. Obviously, he didn't take kindly to that.
"Look, if you were in my shoes, you would have done the same thing!"
"I don't wear shoes, and they wouldn't fit me anyway you wuss. I could've died and you just stood there like a rock."
"Oh yeah, that's real rich coming from one."
"Take that back, fairy boy."
"Oh look, the big lug can form a full sentence. I'm so proud!" Toma growled and tackled Saki, punching and slapping. Saki slipped through his attacks and relied on biting, which proved ineffective. Toma wrapped around him into his boulder state and rolled straight through a wall, skipping over magma and pillars floating through a lava stream before slamming into a sturdy wall, sending both across the room. Both stood up, ready to continue the brawl before a roar made a new fighter present. It seemed to be a bigger Dodongo, with two clawed claws, a proper tail and back spikes, with sharp teeth, a horn jutting from it's forehead, and green scales transforming into grey from its wrists and neck. It growled at the 2 and snapped it's jaws.
"Shoot, it's a fully grown Dodongo! Stay back while I-"Toma said, cut off by Saki yelling, "I'll show you a fairy boy!", and took up a rock and rushed to the dodongo. It turned to him and the rock clanked against his head. It breathed in as Saki jumped out of the way before a stream of flames spurred out of his mouth. It stopped and glared at the Kokiri, advancing towards him. Toma leaped and grabbed the reptile, hurling him at a wall. It slumped and appeared dazed for a few seconds. Toma took this time to pick up a Pickaxe nearby and swing it around like an axe.
"Hey! What do I get?" Saki whined. Toma resisted the urge to roll his eyes and reached into his backpack, pulling out a sharp rock. Saki scowled as Toma shrugged and ran towards the dodongo. It attempted to blow fire at the goron, but Toma jumped over it and swung at the monster.
He didn't account for the tail.
The weak looking tail swung at Toma, sending him flying into the wall. He coughed up some blood as the Dodongo stepped forward and growled and inhaled, intent to send hellfire to Toma. He closed his eyes, cringing as the flames were about to envelope him...but they never came. Peeking, he saw Saki, plunging the sharp rock into the dodongo's tail. It screamed painfully before slumping over and stopped moving. Toma silently stood up and Saki took out the rock. They stood there for a few seconds in silence before Toma sighed.
"Thanks, for that. You did me a solid there, fairy boy." Saki smiled and folded his hands behind his head.
"Ah, don't think too much of it man. Let's just find how to get out of here." Toma nodded and pulled out a potted plant. A Bomb Flower grew from it. He plucked it, and rolled it down towards the ground. It exploded, leaving a hole in the center of the room. Saki whistled.
"You are full of surprises." Toma smiled and simply rolled into the hole. Saki followed promptly, taking out a large leaf and using it as a parachute.
Dylan marched through the caves, dodging keese and dodongo, all the while ignoring his injury. It eventually got to the point where he had to lay down to catch his breath.
"D-Dylan, I think we should go back."
"No, we gotta keep going." He stood back up, his breath hitching for a second. He used the Kokiri Sword as a cane, walking further down the caves. Navi flew next to him.
"Dylan...You'll get hurt even more."
"Well then they better kill me because i'm not going down without a fight."
"Don't say stuff like that! We have to go back out, we'll come back-"
"I don't have time to waste, Navi!" He briefly tried to lean on the wall before realizing his mistake.
"If I don't do this, then who knows! Dodongos might be spilling out the hole we blew to get in here right now, which means we won't be able to get the Goron's Ruby, which means we won't be able to open the Door Of Time, which means I won't be able to go home!" a sharp shrill stopped him in his speech as a swarm of Fire Keese came down from the series. Dylan instinctively rushed in front of Navi and held up his Kokiri Shield. The flaming bats bashed into the shield, sending Dylan to the floor. Raising up his head, he saw his shield burning in a blaze of glory, smoldering into ash before his very eyes.
"You bastards! I'm gonna-"
Boom!
Once again, he was silenced when a sound came from below him. He looked to the source, a previous bomb flower plant, now just a few tufts of grass. The fire keese that caused it to go off screeched, sending all the monsters down the cavern, leaving Dylan to scramble to get away.
"I don't think you're gonna-" Navi said, before the ground gave way, sending Dylan down the hole, screaming.
"-Make it!" she screamed, soaring down the hole towards her friend. The hole was dark all around them, and seemed to go on for miles, before light from torches illuminated a cave. Dylan was laying on his back, groaning.
"I should be dead."
"Don't say that! Sure, you might be thick-headed, stupid, sarcastic, annoying, bipolar-"
"No, I mean I fell, like, 20 feet. By all laws, I should be dead."
"Oh."
"Do you really think that about me?"
"Uhhhh...Maybe." Dylan sighed and forced himself to stand, realizing the room around them. It was granite stone, finely carved with water spouting from faucets and a shrine at the end of a hallway.
"Swanky," he said. He hobbled to the end of the hallway to the shrine, taking time to drink from the fountains. The shrine was tall with Hieroglyphics along the side, showing Gorons. One set looked to be them fighting a dragon, with only bones remaining after the battle. A short person with strange ears, looking just like the hieroglyphs of him from The Great Deku Tree, was standing with a sword held up while the Gorons kneeled before him.
"You are quite popular with everybody. Ever think of naming a street after yourself?" Navi asked.
"This destiny stuff is starting to annoy me." he focused his attention to the main point of the shrine, a Crystal with etchings above and a leather drawstring bag.
"To the Hero, the savior from another land, we leave this power to you, granted by the Goddess of Power. Prove your power, and save Hyrule." Navi read aloud. Dylan picked up the bag, looking inside. Reaching in, he realized it had the same dimensions of his Infinisack. He pulled out a bomb. It was the size of his head and blue.
"You know, those bags are made out of dodongo guts."Navi said. Dylan shrugged and poured the bombs in his Infinisack, stuffing the bomb bag in his pockets and turning to the crystal. A red energy, almost like fire, swirled around in the crystal. He grabbed it without a second thought, holding it up to a torch to see better. He didn't even hear the whirling of mechanisms.
"Hey, uh, Dylan? I think we should go."
"Hold on, let me check this thing out."
"No, we need to go. Now."
"Jeez, what's the pro-" he turned around, and a huge ramp entered his view. A gigantic boulder stood at the top of the ramp, which seemed to have come down from the ceiling.
"Yup. You were right. Let's hit the road Jack!" Dylan bolted and Navi followed. The boulder rolled down the ramp, coming straight towards them.
"This is what I get for shit talking Indiana Jones!" Dylan yelled, pounding dirt and ignoring the pain in his legs. He sprinted faster, seeing yet another boulder blocking an exit. His previously hellbent brain now focused on a way to bypass the obstacle. Rushing a mile a minute, a lone thought popped into his head. He reached into the Infinisack and pulled out a bomb. As soon as he whipped it out, it began sparking like Texas on the 4th of July. He swiftly threw it at the boulder, grabbing Navi as well. The bomb exploded with power, sending a plume of smoke into the room and destroying the rock. He dove through the smoke, out of the room just as the following boulder smacked into the hole. It was too big for it and fully blocked off the room. Dylan breathed, holding a hand to his heart and coughing at the pain in his throat. If Navi wasn't giving off her light, Dylan would have seen her holding her hand to her mouth.
"I think I'm going to barf." The fairy said.
"You didn't even do-" Navi hurled chunks. Actually, no, they were bricks. Dylan could smell rotten eggs and burnt rubber. He gagged a little before giving himself air.
"Ugh. By the way, what does this crystal thing do?"
"I don't know-ugh-just use it or-ulp-something!" Dylan left Navi to herself and took out the crystal. He waved it around, tossed it in the air, he even used it to pick his teeth.
"Is this thing just for show?" He questioned. He tossed it again, aiming to catch it. He overestimated and it fell to the floor. Unexpectedly, It exasperated a small gust of fire before settling, like nothing ever happened. He cautiously picked it up, slightly scared off its power. He knelt to the ground and poked it at the dirt. Nothing happened. He dropped the Crystal about the height of his head. It burst out flames. He picked it up once more and clenched it in his fist.
"I can't believe i'm doing this but…" He raised his fist and slammed it to the ground. As soon as he did, a dome of flames extended from the crystal. It didn't harm him, just simply passed through him, giving him a warm sensation. When it stopped, he stood up amazed, staring at the crystal like it was the messiah.
"I am going to have fun with you." he said, kissing and hugging the crystal. "C'mon Navi, let's go." Navi finished spewing her earlier food and nodded, wiping what was left over away from her mouth.
"And here I thought Fairies were cute."
"Shut up, Dylan."
