Impact Statement of Link, Hero of Time
Drafted by: Link, Hero of Time and Bearer of the Triforce of Courage
Revised by: Zelda, Wise Princess of Hyrule
Delivered by: Link, Hero of Time and Bearer of the Triforce of Courage on October 17, 2016
…
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm here today because seventeen years ago, my self-confidence and self-respect were nearly ripped to shreds by two egotistical individuals. Two people who thought they had the world at their feet because of some processed tree carcass. Two people who decided that the burgeoning friendships they'd made weren't worth squat. I'm talking, of course, about what happened to me and several others during the first Super Smash Bros tournament in 1999.
The premise was simple. Twelve fighters from Nintendo's top franchises would gather together for some friendly competition. Worlds would collide, and new relationships would be forged. At first, that was exactly what happened. I became acquainted with Mario, the humble hero, Kirby, the cute pink puff that could, and Samus, the brilliant Space Warrior, among others. When we weren't battling it out, then we were sitting around in the lounge, talking and laughing. It was perfect, and it was fun. Super Smash Bros was a party game, and nothing more.
Then, the tier list was tacked onto the bulletin board.
I can't find the words to describe what happened after that. All of a sudden, the fun and cozy atmosphere had vanished, replaced by fierce competition. Because of some list, many of the Smashers were spurned and snubbed, most of their heroic acts all but forgotten. And despite protecting Hyrule from the evil threatening it, I wound up victimized, as well.
You might not think that simple words can hurt, but believe me, they cause as much pain as a punch, perhaps more. Shortly after the tier list arrived, word spread that I was not only on the bottom tier, but also in eleventh place. To some, I was no longer the courageous, selfless Hero of Time. I was "the low-tier elf boy". Two of my fellow Smashers needlessly antagonized me, along with four of my fellow C-tiers, over this. Those two Smashers were none other than Douglas Jay Falcon and Fox McCloud.
They were in the A-tier, and they decided that lording it over everyone else would be fun and harmless. Kirby and Pikachu were ranked even higher, and yet they showed some humility. But humility seemed to be a foreign concept to Fox and Falcon, because every chance they got, those two acted like they owned the Smash Mansion. Their nasty attitudes spilled over into the matches, as well. One time, when I was fighting against Fox, he spent most of the match saying extremely degrading things to me. He called me "a cute little elf boy" or a "stupid little elf". He dragged my relationship with Princess Zelda through the mud. He said that my tunic looked like a dress. He tried to verbally emasculate me, and he almost succeeded. The audience wasn't any better, heckling me and throwing things at me and attacking me on the blog.
Their actions made me question my worth as a hero. Did I really deserve Zel's affections? Did I really better the lives of Hyrule's citizens? No matter how many times I saved Hyrule, Dorf or some other malevolent force managed to keep invading it. Zel and her constituents would probably want Hyrule to stay saved, you know? I'm surprised that someone hasn't said to me, "D—n you, Link! You just cleaned up this mess? Can't you keep it clean for at least ten minutes?" I'd spend my time wondering why Hyrule even bothered to put up with me. Those words were like daggers, precisely hitting their mark and wounding my self-esteem. And some of the perpetrators were actually enjoying it! They actually enjoyed making me feel like a useless little elf with a tunic and a sword and a horse!
I didn't think I could take it, but one person helped me, and that person was Luigi Mario. He may have been ranked at the bottom, but he was at the top of my list of people I'd turn to for comfort during those trying days. He'd let me lay my weary head on his shoulder, metaphorically speaking, of course. He'd try to spare me from the bullying by directing the brunt of it towards him. He'd defend me and the other victims at the drop of a hat. And he was even willing to dirty his hands and risk suspension or expulsion from the tournament for us. Luigi, I wanna take the time to say thank you. Thank you for sticking up for us. Thank you for making those furious days bearable. Thank you for being our rock and our lighthouse. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
However, despite Luigi's frequent intervention, the harassment against me was close to unbearable. My reputation was stamped upon on a daily basis. Fox and Falcon continued sneering at me and trying to make me feel like "an elf who plays dress-up". It was akin to being harried and pecked at by a disturbed flock of Cuccos. The castigation, the hate, the mockery—it just—became overwhelming. And it was only Luigi who kept me from losing it.
All of these years later, the pain is still fresh. It will never truly go away. While Fox and Falcon eventually wised up and apologized for their actions, "sorry" will never dull the pain. What they did is something I can't forget, and part of me doesn't want to fully absolve them. I want them to live with the guilt, and sometimes, I want to explode and throw some of their own failures in their faces, almost like what they did to me. But at the same time, I want to make peace with what's happened. And I hope that telling you my story proves to be a momentous first step toward that goal.
In 1999, Douglas Jay Falcon and Fox McCloud took one look at the tier list and decided to throw their friendship with me and several others in the trash. They decimated me, humiliated me and spat upon my heroic actions. They thought they had the world at their feet, and they harassed me because they thought it was all in fun. But in truth, they left a swath of destruction in their path.
Let's start repairing that destruction, shall we?
Please R&R.
