With the party now in the past, it didn't take long to settle back into the usual routines of life at Prince Manor. His father resumed their morning lessons, drilling them on topics they were sure to encounter in the following year, pressing them to practice their wandless magic and brewing with them in his own private lab but outside of these lessons he kept mostly to himself; leaving the children to enjoy the afternoon sunshine without him while he shut himself away in his study pouring over old books.
They brought Hermione home on Tuesday, Ron was originally to have waited on the extra two days as well but he was probably busy exploring an ancient pyramid with his brother Bill by now. Hermione had surprised Harry somewhat by confessing that she was almost jealous of his relationship with his father and the fact that they had intellectual discussions about magic together all the time but then again it was Hermione and she would have lived and died in his Father's Library if she had the chance.
Harry had found it slightly strange staying in his new room once Hermione had gone. The twins were together in the nursery and he was all on his own on the other side of the house. He missed their smiling faces coming in to rouse him in the mornings and the whispered conversations they had had in their Pyjamas long past bedtime. At school he was used to sharing a room with four other boys and having spent most of his life living in a cupboard he just wasn't used to having so much space. He supposed he would get used to it in time though, he was getting a little old for the nursery and he had to admit the privacy was kind of nice for once.
Morgana returned at the weekend with Brendan and Aurelia and together she and Severus took the children back to the seaside. It was a different place to the one they had visited after Cokeworth but it was equally as nice. Severus had started the day in excellent humour. He took Aurelia into the water and attempted to teach her to swim, he bought them kites and fishing nets and sand pails and he handed over coin left right and centre for the children to play on the amusements but as the day went on his mood began to darken.
Brendan had little problem in spending his money but barely acknowledged his existence besides, deferring to Morgana for absolutely everything and while Aurelia did as he bid her, she eyed him warily the entire time as though she expected him to turn on her at any moment - it was not exactly the day of family bonding he had imagined.
Harry too struggled to make sense of the whole day. He had had a great time, there was no doubt about it, but his father's relationship with Morgana confused him. At one point he had been building a sandcastle ( a rather poor imitation of Hogwarts) with his brothers and sisters, and had looked up to see his father sitting stretched out on the rug reading a book. He had looked more relaxed in that moment than Harry had ever seen him in his life, absently playing with Morgana's hair as she lay with her head in his lap but the next minute they were at each other's throats again, sniping at each other, making snide remarks and attempting to score points with the children at the others expense. If it wasn't for all the Muggles everywhere he was sure one of them would have ended up hexing the other.
In fact when they returned home later that evening Morgana, annoyed over his father's continued insistence that they spend the night at the manor, actually did attempt to draw her wand on him but Snape was faster, disarming her before she could even open her mouth.
"You may leave, if you so wish, but the children are staying here." He informed her threateningly, she knew as well as he did that if he pushed for custody he would almost certainly get it.
She glowered at him for a moment, absolutely fuming, then turned to the children and informed them she would be back to collect them first thing in the morning before snatching her wand out of her husband's hand and dissapparated without another word.
The moment she was gone Brendan began to scream.
"Enough!" Severus spat. "You can condescend to stay with me for one night."
Brendan glowered at him darkly, pulsing with untamed magical energy causing the chandelier above them to flicker but ceased in his racket.
Severus sighed and then in an attempt to mollify his son, suggested that it might actually be fun and offered to let the boy decide what they should do for the evening.
"I want to go home." He yelled grabbing his sister by the arm and dragging her towards the fireplace.
"Don't you dare." Severus growled scooping the boy up into the air. Brendan struggled in his grasp, screaming, as he batted and kicked at his father.
Harry gasped; he had never seen such an insolent child, even his cousin Dudley who was one of the most spoiled boys you could ever meet, accepted the word no better than this.
"PUT ME DOWN!" Brendan yelled.
"Not until you calm down." Severus responded, grunting slightly as Brendan tugged on a fistful of his hair.
A moment later though the boy landed a particularly well aimed kick just below his father's belt forcing the man to release him as he bent over in pain.
Brendan laughed manically as Harry stepped forward in the hopes of assisting the stricken man.
It took Severus a moment or two to regain his composure but once he had caught his breath and straightened up again he faced Brendan and quietly asked why he hated him so much.
"You are a mean old man." The boy shouted fiercely.
"How am I mean?"
"You just are and you're ugly and you're boring and you smell."
Severus shouldn't have laughed. He knew he shouldn't have laughed. In truth it wasn't funny at all but there was something about the boy's savagery that made him unable to help himself.
"I want to go home." Brendan said again, glowering at him.
"Tomorrow morning."
"No now!"
"Tomorrow!" Severus told him again, prompting the boy to start screaming again, jumping up and down and stamping him feet.
Lily grabbed hold of him, screaming at him to shut up but he continued to lash out and Severus pulled her away, shaking his head. "Brendan, we will be in the drawing room, please come and join us when you are ready." He said patiently before steering the other children away, leaving the boy to his temper tantrum.
Brendan stared after them incredulously then threw himself to the floor hammering his arms and feet off it as he screamed himself blue but they continued to simply ignore him.
The sound of his cries broke Severus's heart but what else could he do? If he relented and let the boy leave they were back to square one so with a deep intake of breath he sank down onto the settee, pulling his daughters onto his lap and brought an old projector to life with a simple flick of his wand turning the room into their own private cinema.
Deprived of an audience, Brendan's meltdown soon began to lose steam and the screaming soon gave way to muffled sobs before eventually ceasing completely. Severus smiled slightly and waited anxiously for the boy to appear at the door asking to join them but he never did.
Instead the silence was ripped apart by a loud crash. Severus leapt to his feet, almost knocking Lily and Aurelia to the ground in his haste but before he could even reach the door the sound of a second crash echoed through the room. It seemed that Brendan had decided that if he didn't get what he wanted by screaming then he would get it by smashing every window in the house.
"Salazar Slytherin, what the devil is wrong with you?" Snape shouted before attempting to restrain him.
The boy resisted but the floor was covered in shards of glass and Severus was afraid that he would actually hurt himself. "Stop before I'm forced to make you" Severus warned him, wand in hand. He hated that he had had to resort to that but it had the desired effect and the child stilled.
Snape turned to the others where they stood frozen in the doorway, jaws almost touching the floor. "Harry, please take your brother and sisters upstairs to the Nursery. Call for Tolora if you need anything."
Harry nodded solemnly, understanding that they were not to come back down again and carefully ushered his younger siblings past the broken glass and up the stairs as his father watched in silence, hand clamped firmly on Brendan's shoulder.
With the others now safely gone, Severus summoned Cobb and asked him to fix the windows before steering his youngest son into his study.
"Sit." He said pointing at a chair and for once the boy did as he bid.
Taking his own seat on the other side of the desk Severus sat, silently examining the boy as he tried to think of something he could say or do to put things right between them.
It was obviously fear that had motivated his sudden obedience, a sudden realisation that his mother was not here to protect him, she had left him here at his father's mercy, the mercy of the man he had attacked and whose windows he had deliberately broken. He didn't want the boy to fear him though; he wanted him to respect him and be proud of him, he wanted the boy to love him.
Should he have just let Morgana take them home? Should he have called her back when he realised how much distress her leaving would cause? He wanted his son to be happy; did that mean he needed to walk away? Brendan had never been comfortable here. He had always hoped that if he let him be, the boy might eventually come round of his own accord. Now he was driving a permanent wedge between them. He should have left things as they were!
Why had he felt the sudden need to force it? There was no walking away now. Their relationship was about as low as it could possibly go - he had to fix it now or lose him forever.
In an exaggerated gesture Severus put his wand away, "I shouldn't have threatened you." He acknowledged. "I'm sorry."
Brendan looked up at him, blinking though his dark fringe but remained silent.
His father offered him a smile, "I hope you know that I would never hurt you?"
Brendan shook his head and told him that he was hurting him.
Severus rubbed at his face feeling utterly exhausted. "By forcing you to spend time with me?" he asked gently.
The boy nodded.
"I love you Brendan, I want to be a part of your life. I'm trying to be a better father, I'm really trying! I know I haven't made a very good job of it in the past and I know you feel uncomfortable around me right now but I'm not going to give up. Please just give me a chance."
"You're trying to take me away from Mummy."
"Is that what she told you?" Severus asked, the anger rising in him again.
Brendan shrugged, causing his father to glower at him. "I'm not trying to take you away from your mother. You need her, I know that, and I live at Hogwarts for most of the year, all I'm asking for is a few days with you every now and again so we can get to know one another properly."
"I hate you; I don't care what you want. Why can't you just leave us alone? I want to go home."
"You didn't always hate me you know." Severus told him, reaching into one of his desk drawers to pull out an old photograph of himself holding a smiling infant in his arms and handing it to his son.
"That's Harry." The boy said after barely glancing at it before pushing the picture back across the desk towards him as if it were something distasteful.
"I can assure you it's you." His father told him.
Brendan glowered at him
Severus sighed deeply and rose from his chair, his back to his son as he stared out the window as he contemplated giving up once more and bringing Morgana back to fetch them.
"Is there nothing I can do that would encourage you to spend time with me?" he asked sadly.
"No." he replied, six years old and seemingly already filled with a hated for his father that could not be overcome.
It was on the tip of his tongue to call Cobb and have him fetch Morgana. If the boy had said 'please' just once he would have found it nearly impossible to deny him but he remained defiant, tempering his father's resolve and after a moment of strained silence he whipped back around, wishing he was wearing his teaching robes for the effect , "Very well. If you won't do this the easy way we will do it the hard way." He said. " I want you and I to spend some time together and I want you to be polite and respectful in doing so. Satisfy my wish tonight and you can go back to your mother in the morning. Refuse and you will stay here again tomorrow and the night after that and the night after that again. I will keep you here every night, away from your precious mother until you give me what I want."
"Mummy wouldn't let you."
"Mummy will have no choice." He sneered back. It was a step too far and Brendan started to cry.
"You might be able to make me stay but you cannot make me like you." The boy choked out through his tears.
"That's true but I will still make you stay." He said softly, offering his son a handkerchief.
Brendan stared at it for a moment before throwing it back at him in disgust and wiping his tear stained cheeks with his hands. "I won't talk to you, I won't even look at you."
"That's your decision but remember it doesn't have to be like this. If you give me what I want and I will give you what you want. You could still go with your mother in the morning and not have to see me again for another week.
Brendan wiped at his face again "Promise." He asked shakily.
"I promise."
Brendan stood up and walked around the desk to offer his father an awkward hug and telling him in the most monotone voice that Snape had ever heard that he loved him.
Severus took the hug seeing as it was likely the best he was ever going to get but the insincerity of the sentiment hurt him far more than he could have expected. "Brendan I don't ever want to hear you say that again unless it is the truth understood? I don't want you to lie. It's not part of the deal; I just want you to give me a chance to get to know you.
The boy sniffled an okay and stepped back asking his father what he wanted to know.
Remembering the game of twenty questions he had played with Evan last Christmas he smiled before asking his son if he liked hot chocolate.
The boy nodded, and Severus called Loxie to fetch some before asking him what his favourite pastime was.
Brendan thought for a moment. "Brushing Mummy's hair."
Severus looked at him quizzically. It was a strange thing for a young boy to claim to enjoy doing, curious; he was about to ask why when he heard a small voice reciprocating the question.
He smiled, perhaps this would work after all he thought as he explained the way brewing made him feel.
They continued talking as they waited for Loxie to return with their drinks and when they had finished them Severus suggested a game of Gobstones.
Brendan agreed eagerly, and focussing on the game, started to forget that he was supposed to hate his opponent and that he was only there under duress.
After their third game though Severus was forced to call it a night; he wasn't actually sure if his son had a set bedtime but if he did it was probably long past it, the boy could barely keep his eyes open.
"Come on, Time for Bed." He said rising from the chair and extending his hand to his son.
The boy took it and allowed himself to led towards the stairs but as they stepped out into the hall he remembered the windows and his father threats and pulled away.
"Mummy's coming to bring me home in the morning isn't she?" he asked cautiously.
"Yes Son." Snape replied gesturing towards the stairs.
"And you're going to let her?"
Severus nodded.
Brendan gave a brief nod in return and turned and began to run up the stairs leaving Snape to follow him. Upon reaching his bedroom, he stopped and wished his Father a goodnight before slipping inside and slamming the door shut. He obviously drew the line at allowing himself to be put to bed and deciding it was best to leave him to it Snape went to check on the others.
Aurelia was fast asleep. He crept in and straightened her blankets, before planting a gentle kiss on her forehead and leaving her to her slumber. He then glanced into Harry's old room but it was empty as was Lily's though he found her in with Evan. She was in her nightgown but they were sitting on the windowsill talking when he entered the room and he was forced to acknowledge that his pushing a relationship with Brendan was probably hurting the twins. He went in and sat on the bed beckoning them both towards him. It was past their bed time and they glanced at each other cautiously, expecting to be told off but they went to him. He apologised to them for cutting their evening short and reminded them that he loved them. "It will get easier I promise." He said and then pulled back the covers of the bed gesturing for the two of them to get in and told them the story of their meeting their little brother as a baby for the very first time and how excited they were.
"Why did Morgana leave?" asked Lily afterwards.
"I couldn't love her as much as she wanted me to."
"So it wasn't our fault?" Evan replied sounding surprised.
"No, you had nothing to do with it."
The twins looked at each other again and he had a sickening realisation. "Did you think you had?" he asked horrified, trying to remember if he had ever actually explained the reasons behind his split with their stepmother and their subsequent estrangement from their brother to them.
They nodded confirming once more that he was a truly horrendous father.
"It was my fault." He clarified sadly thinking that he would be extremely lucky if he didn't lose them for the very same reason. Why did he find it so difficult to open his heart? Though illegitimate, the twins had been very much wanted and for what? He had spent half his life chasing a ghost, missing out on most of their childhood.
"I'm sorry." He told them again before telling them to go to sleep.
Lily went to get up and return to her own bed. But he shook his head and tucked her back in beside her brother. No matter what houses they were sorted into they were sure to lose a lot of their closeness when they went away to school. He used to be jealous of it, back when it was just the three of them but now he realised that if they hadn't had each other they would have had no one and he wanted them to enjoy it while they still could. So he kissed them goodnight and left them to each other's company while he set off to check on Harry.
His eldest son was lying stretched out on his bed flicking through quidditch weekly.
"Thank you for putting Aurelia to bed."
"No problem." The boy replied without looking up.
Severus smiled. When he had first seen her all snuggled up under the blankets he had assumed Tolora had put her to bed, but something the twins had said made him realise that it had probably been Harry.
After a moment the boy seemed to realise he was still standing there and looked up questioningly. "What?"
"Your mother would have been so proud of you if she could see you now."
Harry blushed and tried to downplay his thoughtfulness by confessing that he hadn't bathed her or anything so she was still covered in sand.
Thinking back on the difficulty he had had getting her into the tub before Harrys' party Snape thought that it was probably a good thing and pointed out Harrys dirty shoes, warning him that he was going to be enjoying a bed full of sand too.
Harry blushed again, and quickly pulled off the shoes muttering something about how he would hardly notice the sand after living in a dusty cupboard most of his life.
"Harry." His father sighed, looking most wounded at the reminder of how Petunia Evans had been allowed to neglect his son.
"I didn't mean…" Harry began before trailing off, unsure of what to say. He didn't blame his father for that but it was what it was, so instead he asked what he had done with Brendan.
I didn't beat him if that's what you're asking. He replied sternly but Harry shook his head.
"We talked; I told him I loved him, he said he hated me, so I threatened him."
"Threatened him you would do what?
" Take him away from his mother….."
"What?" Harry interrupted looking shocked.
Severus nodded and took a seat on the bed beside his son.
"Did you mean it?" the boy asked.
"I think so."
Harry sat quietly for a moment contemplating his answer before asking if it had worked.
"A little bit…. he played Gobstones with me."
"I don't think I would have appreciated it if you had tried to force things like that with me."
"It was different with you. You were more open to reason."
Harry snorted, being a little older perhaps he had handled things slightly more maturely than Brendan but he distinctly remembered how horrified he had been when his Potions Masters name had first appeared on that piece of parchment. It had taken him weeks to get used to the idea and though his father had made it clear that he was willing to do right by him, he never pushed him. He had been gracious enough to let Harry deal with the revelation in his own way and in his own time but Harry wasn't sure how well he would have coped if he hadn't. He could definitely envisage himself deliberately acting out in his classes, blowing up a cauldron or two perhaps. In truth though it was a totally different situation; Harry had needed Snape more, he had no one else. Brendan had always known Snape was his father and he had seemed to have gotten along perfectly well without him up until now. It was understandable that he might be reluctant for things to change, especially given the turbulent relationship between his parents. He probably didn't know if he was coming or going. "He will tell Morgana about this you know." Harry warned his father.
"So?"
"Don't you think she will be angry, she might not even let them come again?"
"They are my children and if I say they are staying here then they will stay here."
"They are her children too though and you know they aren't comfortably here, they barely know you."
"I am their father." He said, getting angry now.
"So?"
"So if I say they are staying here, there is nothing Morgana can do about it."
"And you think that will make Brendan love you? Taking him away from the home he was happy in. Being his father doesn't mean you own him."
"Legally it does."
"What about morally?" Harry countered, frowning. "You should have given him more time to come around of his own accord."
Severus sighed, he knew it was the wrong approach, but he didn't know what else to do. Brendan hadn't been willing to give him a chance otherwise and he was after wrecking the house. He needed to be punished and nothing else that Snape could do would have had any effect on him. "There's no reason he cannot be happy here too." Snape muttered defensively.
"I know but you shouldn't try to force it." Harry said gently giving his father's hand an encouraging squeeze.
Severus looked down at him and smiled. "When did you become so sensible?" he asked.
"I have always been very sensible, you just never noticed." His son replied cheekily.
"Oh really?" his father replied laughing as he reached out to pull the boy into his arms.
Harry allowed himself be hugged for a moment before pulling back and asking his father what he would have done if Voldemort hadn't killed his parents but he had still somehow found out that he was his real father when he started school. "Would you have taken me away from my mother against my will?"
"I really couldn't say Harry, your mother's death has impacted so much of my life that I have no idea where I would be now if things had been different. Probably not though, and since you were born outside wedlock I probably wouldn't have been able to, but I would like to think I could have somehow ended up with the both of you."
"You wouldn't have the twins then or Brendan or Aurelia."
Severus shook his head, "Probably not." He agreed, before pointing out that Harry had asked how things would have been different if the Dark Lord hadn't killed his parents and asked if he still thought of James Potter as his father.
Harry flushed again and stared down at his socks, suddenly very occupied with picking bits of lint off them "Not as my father no but I do still think of the two of them as being my parents." He said apologetically knowing that probably wasn't very fair on his actual father but Snape surprised him by pulling him back into his arms again and telling him that if nothing else James had been his stepfather so he should continue to think of him as one of his parents.
Harry blinked. He thought his Father hated James.
"He gave his life for you Harry; he obviously loved you like his own so you shouldn't let our not getting on cloud your memories of him." Snape added as a means of an explanation on sensing his son's confusion.
Harry smiled and snuggled deeper into his father's embrace. If anyone had told him a year ago that the Snarky Potions Master was a hugger he would have laughed in their face but now he could think of nowhere he would rather be.
