Pain… it's a funny thing, we can't stand it but… at times… it's the only thing that lets us know we are alive. When the pain numbs I know I am in the edge of death, but it doesn't last long. Charlie is always finding new ways to cause me pain, leaving me on the edge of death but not quite. His favourite method? Biting me letting the venom start spreading then sucking it all away, it leaves me half empty as well as causing an extreme burning pain. And I thought James was a sadistic monster…
Even when Charlie isn't down here violating me and torturing me, I'm in pain… most of my bones have been broken and tried to heal, my left arm has healed bent upwards and twisted toward the left…
Physical pain is a bitch but I can cope, the emotional torture my mind is going through is making me go insane. I keep trying to understand why he is doing this to me, I'm his daughter why would he do this to me? What did I do wrong? When did he stop loving me? Did he ever? Was it because I used to only see him during summer? Was it because I stopped coming in the summer? I thought he was happy I came to live with him? Did I cause this? Why does he want to cause me this much pain? Does he hate me for him becoming a vampire? WHEN did he turn? WHY? These questions spin around in my head like a rocket attached to a round-a-bout… Every. Single. Day. Maybe I am Crazy, Maybe I deserve this, I should have been a better daughter, it's my fault he is doing this, I didn't show him I loved him enough, I should have been better, maybe I need to make it up to him, it is my fault. I should just do whatever he says, I feel horrible when I do but it's all my fault, I led the vampire world to Charlie, it's my fault… I must make it up to him… I must be a good slave.
I made the decision to try and do as he says, when he says it, it may mean less pain for me to deal with but that's not likely, but I have to try and set things right. As I sit there in my cage waiting for my Master to come back from hunting, I look around the place that has been my home for the last 6 months, the room is truly haunting. The cage is in the corner furthest from the door and is chained to the wall, the walls are now covered with blood splatters, my blood. It looked as if this room was used to murder half a dozen people, worrying since its all the blood I have spilt in the last six months. How am I alive? Hung on the wall are an assortment of horse whips, most have some customisation on them, nails sticking out of them, sandpaper on them, his favourite is the one with four together; one with nails, one with sandpaper, one that dispenses salt and one with a metal ball on the end, I don't last any longer than ten minutes until I pass out from the pain… On the other side of the room is the king size bed. For the nights Master wants to spend the whole night with me, since he doesn't sleep its quite often, he likes to play when it comes to those times, he brings me to the edge of passing out from exhaustion and pain and then stops, makes sure I am awake and then continues this can carry on for hours, until he finally allows me to pass out, my temporary release.
On the wall by the bottom of the stairs is a photograph, one I try not to look at, he uses it to taunt me, throwing darts at it and forcing me to look at it while he is doing things that you couldn't even imagine, making sure I know I can never be saved. This is my life now, that photo represents my old life before I turned 18 and got sucked into hell on earth. I try not to think of the picture and what its telling me, it's unnecessary pain.
I hear the door slam upstairs. I freeze. My heart is beating out of my chest, I know he can hear it, that scares me even more… the lock turns in the door. He's doing slowly, knowing it scares me. I can feel the sweat dripping down my face, fear. I feel that more than the pain. My Heart beats so loud I can barely hear myself think. THUMP THUMP THUMP the door is slowly opening THUMP THUMP THUMP I see his foot step through THUMP THUMP THUMP he is stepping through now THUMP THUMP THUMP closing the door THUMP THUMP THUM- I blink and his face is directly in front of mine, red eyes staring into mine… I swallow loudly. "Is my Puppy frightened? Good, you should be. Do you need the toilet?" He asks, "Yes please master." I answer fear running through my veins I try to remind myself to be good. He silently gets the bucket and unlocks the cage, I wait for permission. "Good Girl, you are learning. You may move." I move as fast as I can to the bucket. Once I am done, he picks me up and throws me on the bed, I bounce and hit the fall and then land back on the bed. Groaning in pain I make the mistake of trying to sit up. "Did I tell you to move?" he says in a scarily calm voice. "No Master, Sorry Master." He goes the wall with the whips, running his fingers slowly across them, he finally picks up one I have not seen before. The Handle is silver and has leather tassels that you use to whip with, there are about 5 tassels each one has a razor blade on the end, the silver handle has a button which Charlie pushes. As he walks back over I wonder what the button does… "the blades heat up to burn you as they cut you, or just burn you if one doesn't cut straight away. It's a great new toy don't you think?" I start getting very nervous… but I have to reply or he will punish me even more. "Yes master, it looks great." I reply my voice and whole body shaking. It is all my fault I try to remind myself. He smiles to himself, happy that I am finally trying to please him. "good girl, come here." I shakily stand up and start walking over to him, he is stood by the table that is opposite 'that' picture, my legs give way after about 5 steps, I am weak after being kept in a cage, I painfully stand back up and walk the last 7 steps it takes to get to him. Smirking Charlie picks me up with one hand and places me on the table, I'm laid on my stomach and he has turned my face towards the Picture. I'm already completely undressed, he stopped me from wearing anything early on in our 'Arrangement' (that stupid contract) not that me not signing it would have stopped him. I try to brace myself for the pain that is to come, but nothing can prepare you for pain… I just stare at the picture I try to avoid seeing and scream until my throat is raw, Charlie is bringing the whip down repeatedly and his accelerated speed, the razors slicing my skin and burning it at the same time, my back is on fire as I feel the warm liquid flowing from my back and trailing round my body until I am laying in a puddle of my own blood. The pain starts to numb… he is still going, I can feel my skin slicing but I can't feel the pain anymore, my vision is going dark but I can still see one thing. I can still see that picture, its haunting me, I don't want to think about it anymore, I just want to sleep but something's keeping me awake, something I need to acknowledge, I don't want to think about it, emotional pain is harder to numb… even when I think I don't care anymore, I do and I need to think… Think about it Bella! I want to sleep. Why can the vampire leave me to die! Charlie has stopped whipping me and is now licking my body clean of spilt blood. I don't seem to be bleeding anymore… maybe I run out of blood. I focus on the picture again; It is Me and Edward outside of the Cullen House. He abandoned me, leaving me to Charlie's torture. He saw Charlie on my birthday and would have seen what he was thinking, he must have known. Alice would have known too. Stupid Cullen's and their Vampire gifts… Hang on… What is Charlies Gift? Could he have more than one?
"I have quite a few actually" I hear Charlies voice in my mind! "telepathy is just one, the ability to stop anyone coming into one place of my choice is another, which is why nobody has saved you, only you and I are allowed in this house. Also the ability to stop you bleeding out and dying on me, which is why you are still alive. The others you will just have to wait and see." I then hear him laugh as I gasp them finally pass out, trying to wrap my head around what has happened today. They didn't abandon me! That's the last thought before darkness surrounds me…
I'm dreaming. I'm on a boat and am rocking back and forth in the sea, continually at a vicious rate. The Edward appears before me on the boat. "Edward…" I breathe. "Bella…" he says with a pained look on his face. "How?" I ask not sure if I am hallucinating or not. He smiles sadly "Charlie has managed stop everyone from entering the house, we tried… the wolves too. I tracked down a vampire with the gift of dream walking, we have been trying to get through to you for the last two months, it finally worked." My heart feels like it was going to explode, he truly cares, he has been trying to get me! But wait wolves? I remember Jacob mentioning wolves before I learnt about vampires… they are real too?! "what do we do? What about Jacob?" I ask him, a million questions in my mind. "Jacob is fine, he has been leading the pack in the hunt to catch Charlie off guard, kill him and render his powers useless. That may take a lifetime though, you need to try and get out the house." Okay so Jacob is a wolf, that's awesome. But escape the house? I can't even escape the basement! "How am I going to escape the house? He keeps me locked in a cage that is chained to the wall in the basement!" Edwards face pales, I realise he doesn't know what Charlie does to me, he only knows I can't escape. "Please Bella, you have to try your best, try and escape the cage and the basement, once you are out of the basement, getting out of the house should be easier, your waking up I have to go." He says desperately "Edward wait!" I almost shout. "I am able to shield any thoughts of escape from Charlie for you but I need to know what thought to put instead, quickly the connection is going." He is fading as he speaks "Pain." I reply, he fades away but not before I see the horror on his face as I say pain. I am stood on the rocking boat alone until it fades into black but I still feel the rocking sensation. I realise before I open my eyes that the rocking sensation was never a boat, I open my eyes to see the blur on top of me that is Charlie. At that point the pain comes flooding back and I cry out, I feel Charlie's hand across my face as he slaps me saying "Shut up" he continues while I lay there gritting my teeth trying not to scream with pain.
My thoughts drift to planning an escape, I realised during my 'Dream' that Charlie can read my mind so I quickly freeze thinking I'm going to get punished for thinking about escape, "I am not going to punish you for thinking about how much pain you are in." I hear Charlie chuckle in my mind "I like knowing the pain consumes your though process, it brings me… Pleasure" he says to me while deepening his thrusts until I scream each time. I don't know how long later it was when he was finally done but it felt like hours, but when he was done he told me to walk to the cage, I somehow managed to drag myself to a stand, my lower regions throbbing with an intense burning pain, my legs numb from being immobile for hours, I fell to the floor before I could take one step. My master walks over too me, I flinch expecting to be hit. "Are you in too much pain to move my little puppy?" he asks "Yes Master, Sorry I cannot move myself Master, I tried Master" I cry terrified of being punished. "You can sleep on the table today, your legs are becoming crooked" my heart pounds, the table is where he punishes me. Charlie picks me up and lays be on the table, my torn up back on the cold metal makes me hiss with pain. He ties my hands and legs to the table using satin fabric so I cannot move off of the table. Around the table on the floor are spikes sticking up. "So you don't decide to try and get down" he snickers at me. Once the spikes are set up Charlie goes into a draw and takes out a huge sex toy, it's as thick as my hand and as long as my forearm! Charlie chuckles "Would you like this inside you vibrating at an intense level until I return or the next hour being hit with all my whips at once?" he laughs "That please master" I reply quickly, "Beg for it, beg for the vibrating dildo" he laughs inside of my mind, this is horrifying but I cannot be hit again, the pain will be too much! "Please Master! Please can I have the vibrating dildo! Please" I beg "what do you want me to do with it!" he orders me to tell him "please master! Please stick the Vibrating dildo inside me and let it vibrate until you return, please master!" he smiles with victory. Charlie parts my legs and shoves it up me hard and painfully, I cry out with pain. Then the vibrations start…
Omg! O I Can't take it! Wow! I feel like I am going to shatter! I can't focus! O Its painful but nice! No Bella, you can like this! Ah! How the hell am I OH MY GOD! AHH! How the Hell am I Going to escape now! AHH OHHH I'm pulsing AHH This is torture! Why do I like this? I can't! AHHH This may be my only chance to escape but OOOHHHH MMYY GGGOODD! AH AH AH FUCK!
