2.1 (I am ascended to canon!)

You are an inspiration, Prim. This is literal; see below.

Brockton Bay General had far more then the usual amount of activity this night. The auditorium normally used for conferences and training had been all dressed up, and the annual Hospital Charity Ball was starting.

Of course, given the amount of time she spent there, Panacea was near the top of the guest list. And when she went to an event like this, so did the rest of New Wave. Also, the Protectorate could not allow an independent hero group to outshine them in charity events, so Armsmaster, Miss Militia, and all the Wards were there.

Clockblocker was not enjoying himself. His full-face mask didn't allow him to eat, he had been very firmly instructed to open his mouth as little as possible, and horror of horrors, he was going to have to dance later.

I suppose the ballroom lessons help, he thought, but there has to be a better use of our time than waltzing with the society set.

It was with something like relief that he saw the now-familiar puff of smoke in the middle of the dance floor heralding the arrival of the city's newest, and by now most infamous, villainess. She stood with arms outstretched and one foot up on a yellow gleaming cube less then eighteen inches on a side, flanked on either side by the Dastardly Techies.

"Tremble and despair, high society of Brockton Bay! For it is I, THE TECHNO QUEEN, and I have come to ruin your ball! Mewl in quivering horror, for I have placed ONE METRIC TON of PUREST GOLD upon your dance floor! Dare you take the risk of tripping, of twisted ankles and bruised -"

"Um, pardon me your majesty, but I think I've found a problem with the plan." interrupted Tattletale.

"Then speak, Tattletale! Despite my INCOMPARABLE GENIUS, I respect and value the input of my teammates!"

"Well, gold is pretty heavy, and a ton is actually pretty small, and this dance floor is a lot bigger than we thought it would be..."

"Then there shall be TEN! TEN TONS OF PUREST GOLD!"

Nine more plumes of smoke erupted. Curiously, they were quite close to the edge of the dance floor and didn't really seem to obstruct it at all.

"Do not think, my victims, that you shall escape this pit of doom through something as plebeian as a collapsing floor! I, THE TECHNO QUEEN, have strengthened the ENTIRE BUILDING with an ingenious composite of carbon buckytubes, diamond whisker and single-crystal molybdenum alloys! Not even the force of a magnitude twelve earthquake could knock this hospital down."

Dennis watched as his personal nemesis continued to gloat, and realised his time had come. When THE TECHNO QUEEN paused to draw breath, he stood up and assumed a heroic pose.

"I accept this challenge! I will dance the dance of doom, and master this pit of danger!"

The other Wards were broken from staring at the spectacle of the villains, and simply facepalmed. Armsmaster, ever the practical sort, reached out to grab Clockblocker. He was too late, however, as the wayward Ward had already stepped forward.

"And what of you, TECHNO QUEEN? Do you have the skills to escape your own trap?" Dennis stepped up onto the dance floor, and took the royal hand still upraised in dramatic gesture in his own. "Will you dance with me?"

For a moment, just a moment, he could have sworn she was speechless. Then her chin lifted and and she moved her other hand to his shoulder.

"THE TECHNO QUEEN has no fear! MINIONS, MUSIC!"

Once again the smoke appeared, and revealed a robotic string quartet, which immediately began to play a simple waltz. Hero and villain, they danced around the floor, and though the whole room watched, they only had eyes for each other.

As the music drew to an end, the pair reluctantly separated. As they did so, THE TECHNO QUEEN drew a silvery orb from beneath her cape. "It seems that once again I have been defeated by the valiant Wards of Brockton Bay. This battle may be over, but I shall escape unscathed with the use of my DISGUISE BOMB!"

She threw the orb at the floor and there was a soundless explosion of bright plaid light. When it cleared, everyone in the room, male, female and robot, was sporting an enormous afro and a bushy full face beard.

"No, no, no. I call bullshit." exclaimed Shadow Stalker. "I can see you somehow forcing us to grow beards, but how in the fuck did you make Armsmaster's helmet grow a 'fro?"

"Is there no end to your crimes? No limit to your villainy?! You've given him helmet hair!" cried Clockblocker.

"Never shall I leave my foes unmarked! MINIONS, AWAY!"

And like that she, the Dastardly Techies and the robot musicians vanished, leaving Dennis alone on the dance floor.

Best. Night. Ever.

–-

Taylor still had a smile on her face as she walked into the kitchen of her lair and got out a tub of icecream and a spoon. The former Undersiders were all gathered around the table eating their own treats of choice, when she pointed her spoon at Regent.

"Thanks for your help tonight, Alec. I really mean it. There'll be another story on your room when you get back to it."

Brian blinked. "What did he do?"

"He helped her dance. Whenever she was about to put a foot wrong, he'd tweak it back into line," answered Lisa. "I didn't know you had an ounce of romance in your soul, Alec."

"Hey! There's a lot of things in my soul you don't know about!" he replied.

Taylor sat back and smiled as her new friends started bickering.

Best. Night. Ever.

–-

Director Piggot was concerned.

Glenn Chambers had arrived unannounced at the PRT headquarters and asked to meet her, her senior staff, and the adult heroes currently stationed in Brockton Bay.

"What's so serious you needed us all together, Glenn?" she asked.

"What else? The Techno Queen. I am afraid I have bad news concerning her."

"Has the PR department somehow developed intel on her?" inquired Armsmaster, ever practical.

"No; something far more disturbing. I am afraid, that given her pattern of harmless, amusing and even helpful attacks, like last night's five hundred million dollar donation to charity, the public has come to expect a certain narrative in her appearances. If we treat her like the usual villains, we're going to take a massive hit for being uncaring faceless servants of the law."

"We're already going soft on her and her organisation," replied the Tinker. "What more can we do?"

"You're going to have to play along," said Glenn. "You're going to have to embrace her narrative and let her attacks unfold as the entertainment they are." He stopped and sighed. "There is one hero in Brockton Bay that has exactly the right instincts for this job. It is the official recommendation of the Public Relations Department that this cape be given tactical command in the event of further incidents, and that he give training to the rest of you in the proper way to respond if he should be unavailable."

"You don't mean..." gasped Miss Militia, in horrified realisation.

"Yes." replied Glenn firmly. "If The Techno Queen should attack again, put Clockblocker in charge."