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I am so happy to be posting another chapter for y'all. I am also so thankful for all the support I have received from all of you for this story. I hope you enjoy this next chapter as much as the previous ones.


Chapter 14
(BPOV)

As per Edward's suggestion, I decided to attend counseling. Luckily, Leah knew someone and was able to put us in contact. Zafrina Doris was one of the best therapists in her field; Specializing in helping partners of abusive relationships overcome their trauma. She also agreed to meet me, using an alias of course, and wouldn't charge me until I was fully comfortable and sure I wanted to continue seeing her.

I had to admit that if it wasn't for Edward, I probably never would have gotten up the courage to even seek out help. While I knew that my behavior wasn't exactly normal. And I knew that people were constantly having to walk on eggshells with me, afraid of saying the wrong thing. I knew all of this, but I was just too afraid to deal with it.

Dealing with my past would mean dealing with everything that came with it. That was my biggest fear in life; Confronting my demons.

That's what I was expecting the first time I walked into that office. I thought she'd have me tell everything. From the beatings to the assaults...everything. Imagine my surprise when nothing happened.

I was sitting in the waiting room of Dr. Doris' office. I must have been sitting there for only a short while when the door opened and a beautiful woman stood in front of me. Dr. Doris was a very tall, athletically fit woman with a flawless ebony complexion. She had long, off black hair that reached down her back, and a sweet welcoming smile.

"Bella?" She asked me.

"Yes."

"Nice to meet you. Come on in," She held the door to allow me to enter.

As I walked into her office, I took notice of the Beige colored couch and the dark brown leather chair sitting across from each other. I saw a few of her diplomas and certification hanging on the wall, letting me know she was qualified. She had a small bookshelf in the corner of the room, holding a little over a dozen books. There were also some house plants scattered around as well, along with what looked to be a turtle inside a small tank resting on the coffee table. I hate to admit it, but the room felt...comfortable. Almost home-like. There was constant light coming from the windows, which made the office all the more welcoming.

After we made our introductions, she had me take a seat on the couch and took hers in the chair. I was waiting for her to start asking me the usual standard questions; "Why was I seeing her?", "How can she help me?". Instead, she said nothing. We just sat there, facing each other. Neither of us uttered a single word. After about ten or fifteen minutes of silence, I finally decided to speak up.

"I'm sorry," I said. "But shouldn't we be...I don't know, talking."

Dr. Doris simply smiled, playing with the end of the dark-green dress before she responded.

"Do you want to talk?" She asked me.

I hesitated for a moment. "Not really," I told her honestly.

"Then we won't. We can just sit here and enjoy each other's company." I was a little taken aback by her answer and my face must have shown it.

"I can't make you talk, Bella," Doris told me. "My job is to help you understand your past and learn how to deal with it. But ultimately, it's up to you when and if you want to confront it. I can't force it out of you."

For the remainder of the hour, we just sat there and let the time run out without speaking a word. I left my first therapy session not feeling any different about my relationship with James than I did coming in, but at the very least I felt safe enough to return. The next few sessions that followed were just as uneventful. I did start to talk more with Dr. Doris, or Zafrina as she liked to be called. But, we only talked about what was going on in my life, currently; My job, how my day was going, and how Isaac was. We would also talk about the weather, or food recipes, and all of those mundane topics.

Zafrina probably could tell that I was trying to avoid talking about the real issue, but she never pressed me on it. She would just indulge me and let me talk about everything else under the sun. Except that.

At some point, I don't know when I finally became comfortable enough to open up and tell her everything. I don't know what brought it on, I just walked into her office one late afternoon and the first words out of my mouth was "I want to talk about James". Before I knew it, I was telling her our whole story. I don't know if I even took a pause, I felt like I needed to keep going until the words ran out. But Zafrina didn't try to slow me down or even stop me to ask questions. She just let me carry on, handing me tissues whenever I needed (I wasn't even aware that I was crying), and just listened. When all was said and done, I was left sitting there. A big blubbering mess with mascara running down my cheeks, clutching a boxful of tear-soaked tissues in my hands. Feeling more fragile and vulnerable than I ever had before. At that moment, I felt Zafrina's hand on my arm, her deep brown eyes looking back at mine with such sympathy and understanding. After a few moments of letting me recompose myself, we started to finally dive into the real issues.

I'm pretty sure we went way over our usual one-hour session that day.

Over the next several sittings Zafrina we talked about my relationship with James. She first told me to stop blaming myself.

"I'm not-," I attempted to argue.

"I know you are, Bella," She told me. "While you may consciously know it's not. I know there's a part of you, a little whisper, that causes you doubts."

I wish I could have told her she was wrong.

She also helped me come to terms with my feelings towards James. While yes, it was true that I hated this man with a burning passion, I also still held some love for him as well and it was such an awful, confusing feeling. But, Zafrina helped me understand that it was okay.

"You fell in love with the man he used to be," she explained to me. "Those types of feelings are just as strong as the feelings of hate for the man he is now. It's completely normal and okay to have both of those emotions at the same time."

"With time and as you begin to heal, both of those feelings will begin to simmer and fade and slowly they'll lose their power over you," She told me.

We continued with our semiweekly sessions and with each meeting I began to heal more and more. Zafrina helped me come to terms with the trauma of the abuse I suffered from James. She had me actually describe each occurrence of abuse in detail in order for me to comprehend all that happened to me so that I could deal with my emotions. This was truly terrifying and led to many nightmares for the first couple of weeks. Eventually, the terror diminished, as Zafrina had promised, and I found myself stronger because of it. I ultimately came to the realization that, although he tried his best to, James didn't get to decide or define who I am. Only I could determine that.

"He may have tried to make you his victim," Zafrina said during one of our appointments. "But you made yourself a survivor by escaping him. You made yourself a hero by saving your son from him."

All of this was true, and honestly, I was unbelievably proud of myself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rescue Me ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(EPOV)

Bella had been going to therapy for a little over a month now, and I must say that I've seen such a dramatic change in her.

And a pleasant one at that.

She had a new look of confidence about her. She was more comfortable around the house...and around me. She didn't seem too afraid now to be seen relaxing around the house. On more than one occasion I caught her lying on the couch relaxing in her sweats and she didn't jump straight up when she saw me. She also became less afraid to let me take over with maintaining the house. There were few nights when I would be in charge of cooking dinner. Or if she moped the kitchen, then I would mow the lawn or vacuum. It felt nice really, to stop feeling like I had a live-in maid with her kid and more of a roommate.

Somehow though, that didn't feel like the right word either.

But along with Bella starting to become more relaxed at home, she became more social with other people as well. She and Emily started hanging out with one another outside of work, with the kids of course. The two of them would take Isaac and Quinn to the park or get ice cream and while the kids enjoyed their playtime, the adults enjoyed their company as well. Sometimes the other moms from the clinic would join them, which helped Bella create more bonds with people outside of my family.

At first, I was really worried that the therapy was actually doing more harm to Bella than good. The weeks after she started, Bella would have these extremely violent and vivid nightmares. I would hear her screaming from her and Isaac's bedroom. I would go in and try to console them both, as Isaac would be terrified after being woken by his mother's screams. Eventually, though, things improved, and with that came almost a new Bella. And it almost seemed like we were on the road to things being normal.

That was until I got home one day.

I had switched shifts with another paramedic and was able to get off work early on Saturday. After being met by Maggie at the door I followed her into the kitchen where I found Bella. She looked worrisome as she nursed a cup of tea at the counter. Bella was able to get Saturday off this week, so she decided to switch one of her meetings with Dr. Doris to this afternoon. Which, based upon her current state, was not as fulfilling as her previous sessions have been.

I tentatively made my way towards Bella and gingerly made my presence known.

"Hey," I greeted her as I put my keys on the hook by the fridge.

"Hey," She replied, solemnly.

I took a quick scan around the house before I spoke again. "Where's Isaac?" I asked.

"Taking a nap," she answered. "Your mother really tuckered him out today." Taking another sip of her tea.

I nodded in acknowledgment. I then joined Bella across from the counter and just observed her for a few moments.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," She answered. "How was work?"

"It was good," knowing she was trying to change the subject. "But Bella, we both know you're not fine."

"Come on. Talk to me," I reached to take her hand in mine.

Although I was becoming more comfortable with showing Bella physical affection, I was still aware of my need to be gentle with her.

"We started tackling another issue today in therapy," She finally told me.

"Oh really?" I replied. When it came to Bella's session, I never tried to pry information out of her. She would sometimes tell me how things were going and some of what she and her doctor would discuss, but I never would intentionally ask about them.

Bella nodded. "Zafrina thinks that where I am in my progress and with me starting to create new relationships with people. She thinks it's time I should start reaching out and start rebuilding some of my relationships." She took another sip of tea.

Bella then just remained quiet, not continuing with her story. This only allowed my imagination to run wild and overthink what Bella's shrink was trying to imply.

'Please don't tell me this doctor was actually trying to tell Bella she should reach out to her abusive ex-husband.' I thought.

But before I could even question her, she spoke up. "She thinks I should reach out to my parents."

I couldn't hide the sense of relief on my face. I then look over at Bella and saw that she didn't share the same peace of mind as I did. "Okay," I said.

"I'm just not sure I'm ready for that, yet," She admitted.

"Bella, it's your parents," I told her. "Why wouldn't you want to speak with them?"

"Because I haven't talked to them since Isaac was one," Never looking me in the eye.

Not knowing what to say, I simply stood there by Bella. Holding her and trying to show her comfort and support as best I could.

"As James became possessive and abusive, he started isolating me more as well," Bella started to say. "At first it was just telling me he didn't want me talking to one of his colleagues or one of mine. Then he started keeping me from going out with my current friends. Eventually, he made his way to my parents."

She got up from the counter stool, making her way over to the stove behind me to grab the teapot and refill her cup before she continued. "My parents and I had a really good relationship and we'd talk almost every single day. But, James soon put an end to that not long after we were married."

She simply stood by the stove, looking down at her cup. "At first it was just small things. He would ask me to turn off my phone at dinner or he'd come up with some emergency and ask me to call my parents back later. Before, I would usually try and go visit my parents every few months, since we were in Ohio and they were back in Washington. While I was pregnant, James asked me not to visit them, for my and the baby's safety. I agreed. They flew out for Isaac's birth, but I only saw them for about a day. When I left the hospital the next day, I was expecting to see my parents at the house, but James told me they went back to Washington. He never told me why. Not long after, he started screening my phone calls with them and only allowed me to call them when he was home and in the room. I had to cancel both Thanksgiving and Christmas with my parents that year. James said he wanted us to be with his family. And, before I knew it, the phone calls between me and my parents became shorter and farther apart." She continued to sip at her tea.

"My parents would sometimes ask me why I wasn't answering their calls as often or why they wouldn't hear for me as often. I usually make some excuse; Busy with work. Motherhood was keeping me on my toes. When in reality, James just didn't want me talking to them." She went back to sitting at the counter. "He told me I should be focused on taking care of our family and nothing else. One day, not long after Isaac's first birthday, my parents called and he ended up picking up the phone before I could. He told my dad I couldn't come to the phone, even though I could. When he hung up, he told me he was going to disconnect the landline and if I wanted to talk to my parents I needed to ask him and use his phone to do so." I could see Bella becoming more sorrowful, as she was recalling memories of her parents.

"He never did of course," She kept her head down.

I never thought I could hate someone as much as I hate James Hunter. So many times I wondered what I would do if James actually did come back to take Isaac and Bella. What I would do to him if he tried. I've never been a violent person, but with this man (if one could even call him that), I wouldn't mind changing that.

I held Bella's hand again, trying to show as much comfort as she would let me.

"I don't know anything about what's going on with them," She continued. "I don't know if they've talked to James or what he might have told them if he has. I'm so scared to face them. Will they be angry with me? Will they judge me? I just…I can't face them." She continued to ramble and I could see she was starting to become more and more unhinged.

Testing her limits, I walked over to Bella's side of the counter and wrapped my arm around her shoulders while she still sat there. I gave her arm a gentle squeeze and lightly caressed it. After a few moments of consoling touches, I felt the need to speak my mind.

"Bella," I spoke. She looked up at me as I stood beside her. Those sweet chestnut eyes staring back at my own. I could see the pain and hurt they carried.

I gathered my own emotions before I spoke again. "They're your parents, Bella," I told her. "A lot of things may have changed, but that fact remains the same," I gave her arm another squeeze.

I could see the corner of her mouth turn up in a smile. "They love you and they will just be happy to know that you and Isaac are safe and healthy. At the very least, you can give them that."

Another grin graced her face. "That's what Zafrina said," she told me.

"And she's right," I agreed with Bella's therapist. "Bella, I can see that you miss them. You have gone without speaking or seeing your parents for over a year, it's time to remedy that. I think it would be good for you. And for Isaac as well; He should get to know his grandparents."

"But what if James finds out?" She asked.

"If that's what you're worried about, then we'll take precautions to make sure he doesn't find out," I promised. "But if you're really wanting to talk to your parent; You should. Even if it's just simply writing them a letter. I think this will help you heal."

After taking another couple of sips from her cup, Bella looked up at me once more. The look of happiness more obvious than before.

"Thank you, Edward," She said.

"So, you'll talk to your parents?" I asked her.

"Well, I'm not sure yet," She said, still unsure. "But, I will definitely consider everything you told me. And thank you for being there for me...with everything." She looked away for a moment.

"You know I will be there and support you, no matter what Bella," I told her confidently as I gave her arm another comforting squeeze. "Whatever you decide."

"Thank you for your support," She then stood up from her seat and reached her arms around the back of my neck to pull me into a friendly hug. I reciprocated her embrace, bringing my arms to wrap around her sides. It always felt nice in those rare moments when Bella would allow her walls to come down and let me in. Even if it was just for a brief few seconds. I continued to hold Bella in our hug and the longer we stayed like that the braver I began to feel. With her hair being so close to my face, I could smell the sweet scent of strawberries wafting into my nose. This only provoked my boldness even more and before I knew it my lips came to rest against the top of her head, ready to place a soft kiss there. Then, at the last second, I chose against it. With that, the hug started to lose it's tenderness and became more awkward for me.

Bella must have felt the change as I started to feel her grip loosen around me. Eventually, we both released our hold.

"I...I should probably go wake up Isaac," She told me awkwardly as she made her escape from the kitchen and me.

I then went over to the fridge, banging my head against the door a few times before reaching in and grabbing a beer.

'I am so beyond fucked' I thought.


It's nice to see Bella finally coming to terms with her past and learning to deal with her emotions in a healthy and safe way. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think. I plan to have the next chapter up next week. Have a great rest of your week y'all!

Until Next Time...