Miss Ranma
!SOUND EFFECTS! "THOUGHTS"
Chapter Six
"It took me so much time to finally track you down, Ranma. But every time I did I found you as a girl. And here I had begun to think my tracking skills were lacking. Then I realized how much you still look like yourself when you're traipsing around as a girl. And to think I thought you were a beautiful young woman when I saw you at Jusenkyo. I even had dreams about you!" Ryoga said with a shudder.
"I can explain, Ryoga. You see..."
"Shut up! What's even more disgusting is the fact that you're fooling this guy with your cursed form. Why don't you douse yourself with some hot water and show him who you really are?"
"This is who I really am!"
Then Ranma paused for a moment. "How do you know so much about Jusenkyo curses anyway?!"
"Never mind that! Because of you, I've seen hell!"
"What are you talking about?"
"Where were you when I showed up for that man to man duel?"
"I was behind your house, Ryoga. I know you had problems with getting lost but surely you'd be able to find the lot behind your own home," Ranma asked, giving the lost boy a quizzical look.
"It simply took me some time getting there! So why didn't you wait for me?"
"I waited three days for you, Ryoga. After that time my father dragged me off to China for one last training trip where I discovered myself. Then we arrived here in Nerima."
"So that's it. You knew I would beat you so you ran off to China with your dad. Did you deliberately get yourself cursed to become a girl to escape my wrath?!"
"This isn't a disguise! What I was before was a disguise. The woman you see before you is what I really am!"
"That's a crock! I've seen you naked in gym class as a guy! There's no way you were born a girl. But I have to admit that your current disguise is pretty good. I wouldn't have known it was you except for the fact that everyone kept calling you Ranma. I've even seen some of the fights you've had while disguised as a girl. Despite your cross-dressing, your fighting style is practically the same. But I don't understand why you like going around in your cursed form. Is there something about you we don't know?"
"There's a lot you don't know!" While this was going on the large crowd that had begun to gather during the earlier fight between Kuno and Kenji had steadily increased.
"Ryoga!"
"What?!"
"It's me, Kenji! Listen, dude. Ranma's a full woman. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about."
"Oh, it's you. Listen, Kenji. I never really liked you anyway. As it was you were too much of a ladies man. And now you're with a she-man. I guess you're expanding on what you like."
Kenji looked at the lost boy incredulously. "You don't know what you're talking about, Ryoga. It's obvious I've hit you on the headway too many times during some of the fights we've had."
"You know Ryoga?" Ranma asked, turning towards her fiancee.
"Yeah. I've run into him a few times while I trained in various dojos that were in out of the way areas in northern Japan. Ryoga was always getting himself lost in these places. Sometimes, when I came into contact with him we'd spar against each other. He was one of the few people I could cut loose on."
"How well did you do against him?" Ranma asked with a look of interest on her face.
"Well, in the earlier years he normally defeated me. But in the later years, I beat him more often than not."
"You got lucky more often than not! And now you've jacked yourself up on steroids," Ryoga responded, regarding the muscular young man with long dark blue hair.
"Noo! I don't take steroids and I never did! One of the reasons I started defeating you more often is because I learned several techniques from American and European martial artists, some of whom were weight lifters."
"Most American martial artists are a joke!" the bandanna headed boy answered.
"Not always. And even if their skills in the martial arts were inferior to yours and mine, they still were able to teach me a few things I didn't know. One guy taught me how to increase my brute strength."
"Is that where you got your steroids from, Kenji? They must have some good supplements in America."
"No, Ryoga. But I did learn bodybuilding and a few maneuvers that would be foreign to most Japanese. A master of strength from Norway not only helped me increase the strength in my hands and arms, he even taught me how to use my ki hammer to propel myself through the air which allows me to practically fly. A black guy from America taught me how to deal with people when they use guns. A Mexican guy from America taught me how to deal with guys who use knives. A guy from France taught me how to..."
"Whatever?!" Ryoga interjected. "I'm not here to fight you, Kenji; I'm here to get my revenge Ranma for all the bad things that have happened to me that are his fault."
"What happened to you that's my fault? Are you still angry about the bread I took from you or because I didn't wait for over three days behind your house?" Ranma piped in. "And you still haven't told us how you know so much about Jusenkyo!"
"Never mind all that! I don't care about your alternative lifestyle but I'm going to destroy your happiness!" Ryoga immediately grabbed the bamboo umbrella he normally carried and threw it at Ranma.
!ZWOOM! "Look out!"
"Aaaagh!" a Furinkan student who had been watching the fight screamed as the passing umbrella struck him in the side after it missed Ranma despite the student's efforts to avoid it.
"Enough!" Kenji stated, reaching out for the umbrella and taking hold of it.
"Look, Ryoga. You haven't developed any kind of caution when it comes to people who aren't your enemies. That was one of the things I didn't like about you. You need to be careful about throwing this thing around. Something this sturdy and heavy can hurt someone."
"Shut up, Kenji! If you'd quit thinking about what you think is in Ranma's pants and use what little intelligence you have you'd realize what Ranma really is. But I don't have time to explain the facts of life to you right now."
"What?!"
"That's it, Ryoga!" Ranma interjected. "You've spent most of your life blaming me for everything bad that happened to you! And now you insult my fiance. You want to fight; so be it!"
"I don't think I want to fight you here and now. Kenji's liable to interrupt our man to man fight, protecting what he thinks is a pretty young woman." With the flick of his wrist, Ryoga whipped out a long whip-like bandanna and snapped the hand Kenji was using to hold his umbrella.
"Ouch!" As Kenji dropped the umbrella, Ryoga quickly used his whip to grab the umbrella and pull it back to himself.
"I'll be back when there aren't so many innocent bystanders around getting in the way." With that, the bandanna wearing boy leaped into the air and took off.
"What happened there?" Kenji asked, turning to Ranma.
"Too much blaming of others for his problems. Anyway, it's a long story. But what's this about you being a ladies man, hmm?"
"Um. Well." Kenji blushed for a moment. "Let's go home, we can talk about things from there."
"All right." As the three walked away, Ranma looked at Kenji and smiled.
"Is that a friendly smile or an I'm going to get even with you later smile?" Kenji thought with concern. "Ryoga did always have a knack for messing things up!"
XXX
"Elder, where's your grandson, Mousse?" one of the teenage amazon girls asked, looking around the Chinese port Ranma and her father had left just a few days ago. "How long do we have to wait here?"
"Shh!" Elder Aloe commanded. "He'll be here any minute."
"Caw! Caw!"
"There he is. Give me that kettle of hot water!"
"Yes, Ma'am." !SPLASH!
"Did you find them, Mousse?" the elder asked when the transformed Mousse had finished spinning around and changing into his usual amazon robes.
"Yes. Ranma lives in a ward of Tokyo, Japan, called Nerima. But..."
"But what?!"
"She already has a fiance, some big strong guy. It won't be easy to defeat this guy should the time come," the bespectacled boy explained dourly.
"Don't let that get you down. We'll have no problem dealing with this guy. Now, go back there and keep watch over what's going on. We'll be in Nerima, Tokyo in a couple of days."
"Yes, grandmother." !SPLASH!
As Mousse's avian form departed, Aloe clapped her hands together. "It's time for us to depart! Is everything ready?"
"Yes, Elder. The boat is ready," a young woman who was older than all the amazons there except for Aloe answered. She was a beautiful woman with orange-colored hair that went halfway down her back. In addition to all that, she was broad-shouldered and busty with strong limbs.
"Good work, Rinse. Then let us be off."
XXX
Later at the Tendo household...
"Well, Ranma?" Akane asked, looking in the pigtailed girl's direction as she, her sister, Nabiki, Kenji, and Ranma was sitting at a table with snacks and drinks in front of them in the room out back, adjacent to the yard where the koi pond was located. "What exactly did you do to this Ryoga guy?"
"Beyond not waiting for him for more than three days? I don't know."
Then Kasumi walked into the room. "Ranma, there's a letter here for you from a Ryoga Hibiki."
"It's a challenge letter. Hmm?"
"You must have done something, Ranma. This is more than your everyday annoyance," Akane said with her arms folded on her chest in judgment of the redhead.
"Now I remember!" Ranma exclaimed, slapping herself on the forehead. "It was the start of the new semester at the high school I attended in the past. Lunchtime was always a mob scene there. It was an all-boys school after all."
Then Ranma noticed everyone looking at her strangely. "This was when I was under hypnotism and wore those magical sarashi chest-wraps that made me look like a boy."
"Oh!" Kenji gasped along with the others.
"Anyway," Ranma continued. "At lunchtime, the lunch lady would throw different kinds of bread like curry bread, chow mein bread, sweet-bean bread and the like. As the bread was thrown the boys would scramble for it. As quick and agile as I was I always leaped into the air and grabbed the bread I wanted."
"What's so bad about that?" Kasumi asked innocently.
"Well. Since Ryoga and I were the only martial artists of high caliber in the school, he would often leap up into the air and grab a flying piece of bread."
"Let me guess what happened, Ranma," Kenji interjected. "As fast and agile as Ryoga was, you were a whole lot faster. Thus you literally stole the food right out of his mouth."
"I didn't steal anything. It was every man for himself!"
"Every man?" Kenji interjected out, his eyebrows raised.
"You know what I mean!" Ranma replied dismissively.
"I'm willing to bet Ryoga felt you stole what was rightfully his. That's what I meant, Ranma."
"Yeah. You're right about that, Kenji. Ryoga would get so angry about being so much slower than me that we often fought over the bread with me winning all the fights."
"How often would this happen, Ranma?" Kasumi asked.
"Practically every day."
"It sounds like the case of a lot of straws on one camel's back," Kasumi said as she poured tea in everyone's cup.
"Ranma."
"What is it, Akane?"
"The date of your showdown was yesterday," Akane answered, looking at the challenge letter.
"No problem. The way Ryoga gets lost all the time he's probably in Hokkaido right now. It will be a while before Ryoga gets back to Nerima."
"Kenji."
"What is it, Nabiki?"
"I have another job for you."
"Are you sure about that, Nabiki? Maybe it's a job for Superman."
Nabiki regarded her brother with a grimace on her face for a moment. Then she continued. "Anyway. I haven't signed you up for it yet but it's a demolition job. It will be about a week from now. It's a whole lot of money for us since several of the demolitions workers are on strike. Will you do it, Kenji?"
"All right, Nabiki."
"You do demolitions, Kenji?" Ranma asked, looking at her fiance.
"Yes. I'm strong enough with my ki hammer to bring down whole buildings if necessary."
"I'd like to see how you do that."
"Maybe you'll get to see me flex my muscles," Kenji said with a smile.
"I've seen your muscles, baby," Ranma said with a wink. "But the question is how many other girls have seen your gorgeous body."
"Um. Well," Kenji stammered, looking askance away from Ranma.
"Give me a break, Kenji. A gorgeous guy like you with your charm has had to have had a lot of girlfriends. Come on and spill it."
"Well," Kenji said, blushing a little. "I have had a couple of girlfriends here and there but none of them looked as good as you do, Ranma."
"Are those relationships over?" Ranma asked, regarding her fiance with a neutral look.
"Yes, they're over! I'm free as of right now. By the way, have there been any guys you've been with I should know about?" the young man countered, changing the subject.
"Well, there is an amazon male who tried to have a relationship with me but I wasn't interested in him."
"Anybody else, hmm?" Kenji asked, raising his eyebrows.
Ranma thought for a moment. "There were some overly affectionate monks who felt me up, thinking I was a boy but nothing happened there," Ranma said with a shudder.
"That's disgusting, Ranma!" Akane exclaimed. "You're such a pervert!"
"Oh, shut up, Akane!"
XXX
A week later...
"Place your bets!" Nabiki called out to her classmates who had gathered around in anticipation of the upcoming fight.
"Wow! I hear this guy's tough. Ranma has a hard battle ahead," Hiroshi exclaimed.
"Who is this guy?" Daisuke asked, turning to his friend.
"He's a guy who hates Ranma for some reason, something about his bread being stolen."
"Ranma can take my bread any time!" a boy said out loud.
"Do you think a mere girl, even if she's Ranma can take on this bruiser? He's really tough looking, I bet he's tougher than Kuno."
"You want to make your bet official?" one of Nabiki's cohorts interjected with a pen and paper in her hand as she appeared seemingly out of nowhere.
"Um..."
"So you've finally shown up. But why are you here as a girl? Become a guy so we can finish our man to man fight," Ryoga said, cracking his knuckles.
"I'm not here to fight. Here!" !WHPP!
"What is this?" Ryoga said as he caught hold of a package of curry bread.
"That makes us even now, right?"
"What?! Is this some kind of joke?!"
"Sheesh! All right, greedy. Here's your lousy chow mein bread!" In a few moments, Ranma had tossed several kinds of bread towards Ryoga.
"You happy now? Did I forget anything?"
"What are you trying to pull?!"
"This is a bread feud isn't it?"
"You think a bread eating contest will avenge my honor?!"
"I didn't know what you wanted. You didn't want to show me; so what do you want me to do?" Ranma answered, raising her eyebrows and shrugging her shoulders.
"Why two-faced, thief."
"Thief?!" Ranma exclaimed.
"Grrr! Enough chatter! Attack! Attack! Attack!" the bandanna headed boy quickly whipped out his bamboo umbrella and attempted to hit Ranma with it, missing the fast-moving girl all together.
"Wait a minute, Ryoga. What's your problem? All right. Now that you're here, I'll buy you some fresh bread. Will that make you happy?" Ranma said with a smile as she dodged and eventually flew into the air with Ryoga leaping up after her.
"No! Thanks to you, I've seen hell!" the fanged boy screamed as he attacked, slinging countless razor-sharp bandannas in Ranma's direction.
!CUT! "Yeow! What are you talking about?" Ranma queried as they both landed several feet from each other.
"Do you think mere words can convey what you've put me through?!" Ryoga screamed as he took out an unusually long bandanna from out of nowhere and snagged Ranma's wrist with it.
"Hey!"
"Now you can't run away, Ranma."
"How many kinds of bandannas do you have, anyway?"
"You won't make light of this, Saotome. But speaking of making light, what's stopping you from turning into a boy? Or do you like prancing around like a girl with your top ripped?"
"I am a girl, Ryoga! How many times do I have to tell you that? And if you don't like my body, you don't have to look!"
"You must have taken a dip into that spring at Jusenkyo and fell on your head. No matter. But why did you feel the need to get surgery to have such huge tits? There's no way those things are real. I've seen less plastic at a Tupperware party! Talk about going overboard. What's wrong with..." ! KRACK! "Ungh!"
"Shut up!" Upon stunning the lost boy, Ranma used her escape artist skills to slip free of Ryoga's long lengthened bandanna. "Don't make fun of my body like that; it's so rude!"
"Does the truth hurt, Ranma?"
"You're gonna hurt in a minute!"
"There's no way a little girl like you can hurt me. You ought to turn into a guy so you have at least a small chance of giving me a good fight. Not that it matters but your girlish looks are a distraction."
"Oh? Can't take your eyes off them, can you?"
Ryoga paused as he regarded Ranma for a moment.
"Here you are seeing me as a guy and you keep looking at my chest. Are you using what you think is my curse as an excuse to indulge in your alternate lifestyle, hmm?" Ranma asked with a coy look on her face.
"Shut up! You're the one with the alternate lifestyle, not me! After I've kicked your ass I'm going to expose you for the she-man you really are! But as for now, this is for you!" Ryoga immediately took his umbrella and opened it up, attacking Ranma with it by swinging it in a wide arc angle that knocked Ranma back several feet.
"Aaagh!" But Ranma wasn't out of the fight yet! Being sent end over end, the pigtailed girl used her phenomenal acrobatic skills to land on her feet.
"You like that, bitch?! Try this on for size!" Ryoga's umbrella came flying fast straight for Ranma at super speed!
"It's like that thing has a mind of its own. I better move and move fast!" !WHRRRRR! !THUNK! As the bamboo weapon flew past her, Ryoga was upon her again.
!WHS!WIFF!POW! "At least you can still take it like a man, Ranma. Talk about abs of steel. But that won't be enough to beat me."
"I got more than that, Ryoga," Ranma answered back, kneeing her opponent in the groin and hitting Ryoga on the top of the head with a two-fisted ax handle attack as he lurched forward, following up with a powerful knee thrust to the chin.
"Aaargh! That hurt!" Ryoga screamed, clutching his groin.
"It probably wouldn't hurt so much if you weren't so turned on by looking at my chest. And by the way, they're totally real!" Ranma answered back with a smirk.
"That guy might be a match for Ranma," a boy called out as he watched the fight rage on.
"Huff! What's with this umbrella?!"
"Hmm?" From her vantage point, Akane turned to see Daisuke try in vain to lift the super heavy bamboo umbrella Ryoga had thrown around like a rag doll.
"I can't pick this thing up. It's so heavy." The young boy's face went red with the effort as the weapon didn't budge in the slightest.
"Let me try. Huff!" "I can barely pick this thing up myself. Yet Ryoga casually waves this thing around as if it were a baton. Ranma's at a serious strength disadvantage." "Ranma look out!" Akane called out. "He's really strong! Stay away from him!"
!WUMP! "I felt that even though he missed. This guy's stronger than I am, maybe as strong as Kenji. But he's not so distracted the way so many of my other opponents have been. Is the fact that I'm a girl what's keeping most boys from paying attention to the fight? That could be it. Ryoga sees me as a guy so he's giving me everything he's got." Ranma contemplated.
"It looks like you found out about my insurmountable strength a little too late," the powerful bandanna headed boy said, attempting to hit the fast-moving Ranma. "And by the way, it's all done without steroids, unlike your boyfriend."
"Oh, get over it, Ryoga. You're not that much stronger than me. In fact..." While Ryoga moved in for the kill, Ranma ducked down and tripped him up, flipping him over and sending him flat on his back with Ranma on top of him, locking his spread arms up with her legs in a complex jiu-jitsu hold that arched Ryoga's back.
"Ungh!"
"What was it I found out too late?" Ranma said with an arrogant smirk. Anyway, want to give up now, Ryoga? Can't we all just get along?" Ranma said as she looked down on him.
"How dare you put me in such a compromising position?!" Ryoga kicked his legs up and then down, propelling himself forward, getting his arms free and throwing Ranma off of him.
"What are you talking about?!" Ranma snapped back as she came flying into him fists first into his abdominal section, knocking him back further than he had knocked her back previously.
!SLAM! "Ungh!" Ryoga turned and saw his umbrella laying on the ground; so he grabbed it and attacked with a fast-paced forward thrust in Ranma's direction!
!RRRIIP! "Hey, I liked this shirt!" Ranma said, looking down.
"This is a man to man fight! Quit acting like a ripe bitch!"
"What?! Who are you calling a bitch?!" Ranma came at Ryoga full steam, knocking him out of the school with a powerful roundhouse kick.
"They're over the fence! After them!" a student called out.
"I have to see this!" another yelled as everybody followed the fight.
!CRACK!SMASH!POW! "Ungh!"
!SPPSHHH! "The fight's been so brutal they've cracked the water main! There's water everywhere!"
After having been knocked back several feet by Ranma's fist barrage, Ryoga used his umbrella to protect himself from the geyser of water coming at the both of them.
"What the..." Ryoga exclaimed as Ranma came leaping over the bamboo weapon, the previous tear to her tunic having increased, giving the lost boy an almost unobstructed view.
!FWOK! "What now, Ryoga?" Ranma said after landing a powerful punch and kick combination that ending in a powerful vertical kick, bringing her knee forward and across her chest, swinging her hip while extending her kick outward, striking her opponent's jaw with the heel of her foot, stunning the bandanna wearing boy.
"What's wrong with me?! I can't take my eyes off of her! This is all Ranma's fault! How dare he embarrass me like this?!" The lost boy blushed red as he regarded his opponent's burgeoning womanhood.
"What is your problem, Ryoga?" I didn't hit your nose; so why is it bleeding so much?"
"Ranma!" Akane interjected. "Your... Your... Your top got sliced open!"
"Huh? Oh!" Then Ranma turned towards Ryoga, covering her torso up with her arms as she blushed a little. "I'm going to let you in on something, Ryoga. When I was born, my father was very disappointed."
"Let me guess. He wanted a boy," Ryoga said with a smirk.
"Yes; so he raised me to be a boy," the redheaded girl answered pertly.
"When I said he wanted a boy I meant that you're a cross-dressing pervert instead of a real man, Ranma."
"I meant that I was born a girl, idiot! My father had me hypnotized into thinking I was a boy so he could..."
"I saw you naked as a boy in a P.E. class at our other school, Ranma. There's no way you weren't a guy."
"My father had me wear a magical sarashi chest-wrap that held my breasts in place and made me look like a guy."
"Why would he do something like that?"
"So that he could raise me as a boy, eventually take me to Jusenkyo and shove me into the spring of drowned boy. His ill-conceived plan was to have me marry one of the daughters of his friend so they could merge their schools."
Ryoga looked at Ranma incredulously for a moment. "Do you expect me to believe a crock and bull story like that?! It's really easy for me to tell that you were always a guy and that you went to Jusenkyo and fell into the Spring of Drowned Girl. But I'll say one thing. I always thought you were a little bit fruity, Ranma. Now you can indulge in your crossdressing with ease. Sooner or later I'm going to douse you with hot water so your over-muscled boyfriend can see you for what you really are."
"I don't know what I've done to make you so bitter and angry with me, Ryoga," Ranma said, practically trying to calm her opponent down with her softening gaze. "But despite everything that has happened to me I take it in stride and treat others with kindness."
"Heh, heh, heh. Haha haha! So you think you've had problems? What you've gone through is nothing compared to what I've suffered! Even if you are cursed to turn into a gorgeous woman, you don't know what suffering is! What a joke!" Ryoga announced, grasping a whole bunch of bandannas and immediately throwing them all over the place!
At the onset of the auto-fire killer bandannas, the audience ran for their lives! "Take coverrrrr!" !VRRR! !ZZZZ!
"Aaaaagh!"
"At this rate, he'll kill someone. Maybe I can go reason with him," Akane said as she ran towards the bandanna slinging warrior. "Hey! Ryo..."
"No! Get down, you idiot!"
"I can make it!" Akane called out as she tripped on a branch as a flying bandanna knocked her to the ground.
"Akane, look out!" Ranma yelled, running towards downed the girl. "I told you to stay down! I wish you'd pay more attention to what I'm trying to say more often, Akane!"
"There's no way I'm listening to you when your clothes keep coming off!"
"That's not my fault, Akane! But you could quit being so thick-headed and keep yourself safe? Your skills as a martial artist aren't that good!"
"What?! How dare you say something like that?!"
"It's true! And on top of that, you're clumsy and slow. Now stay down before one of those killer bandannas hit you!"
"Oooh! If I'm such a bother to you, I'm going to just leave..." !WACK! "Ungh!"
"Akane!" Ranma called out as she ran to her side.
"Ah! An opening!" !WOOSH! "It's over! Even if you dodge my flying umbrella, my bandannas will strike you from every direction, destroying that pretty body of yours!" Ryoga said in triumph.
Without even turning around, Ranma kicked the oncoming umbrella, turning it over; so that she was able to grab the handle. Then she opened it up, using it to shield her and Akane from the oncoming bandanna blades flying all over the place.
"Hang on, Akane!" Ranma yelled as she grabbed Akane with her free hand and flew away.
"Wasn't that umbrella incredibly heavy?" one of the boys asked.
"Yeah, it was. I had no idea Ranma was so strong," Daisuke said.
"Is there anything Ranma can't do?" another boy asked no one in particular.
"Yeah. She can't keep her clothes on," Hiroshi replied. "Did you see how her top got torn up?"
"Oh, yeah. Not only did we get to see a great fight but we also got to see..."
"I don't believe you guys are swooning after that dude?" Ryoga said to the boys.
"Dude?! Ranma's a hot chick if I ever saw one!"
"She's a cross-dresser. After I've beaten him up, I'll show you what Ranma really is. Then I'll end his perverted life." With that Ryoga leaped into the air after Ranma.
"I'd love to see Ranma get exposed," Daisuke said.
"I'll say," Hiroshi replied.
XXX
"Are you all right, Akane?" Ranma asked after deftly landing on the roof of a house that was a few blocks away with Akane and the umbrella in tow.
"Oooh." As Akane awoke she shook herself free from Ranma's hold. "Get off of me!"
"What?! I was trying to keep you from being skewered!"
"You were trying to feel me up, you pervert!"
"Get over yourself, Akane! Even if I swung that way, I wouldn't be interested in you. Sheesh! Anyway, this was all your fault."
"My fault?" Akane queried.
"That's right. I would have defeated that guy by now if you hadn't interfered."
"Interfered?! You couldn't have beaten a powerhouse like that! I had to do something."
"I've beaten powerful guys like him before," Ranma answered hotly.
"If you're talking about my brother, Kenji's a nice guy and got distracted when your top came open! But Ryoga sees you as a cross-dressing pervert and rightly so. He's not going to be impressed by your perverted chest."
"What?!"
"Besides, it's obvious that you've pissed this guy off big time. But despite all that I can tell he's not really a bad guy. I figured I could reason with him. You should try talking to people sometimes instead of fighting so much all the time, Ranma."
"That's rich coming from you."
On the ground, Ryoga stood there for a moment, watching the two girls argue. Then !SHHHHIP!
"What's he doing with that belt?" one of the bunch of boys who had followed Ryoga said.
"I don't know, but he's causing it to stretch somehow. Look how long it is."
Back on the roof of the house Ranma and Akane were still arguing.
"I know what I'm talking about! This guy's angry, not evil. All I have to do is talk to him," Akane explained.
"That's ridiculous! But you can talk to this guy after I've beaten him up which I would have done by now if you hadn't gotten in the way..."
"I have to get involved to keep you from getting naked all the time!" Akane quipped. "I mean look at the way you're not dressed right now!"
"That's not fair! It's been only a few days recently since I've even had to worry about keeping my top intact. I've fought Ryoga and other fighters before and I didn't have to worry whether my shirt got ripped up or not."
"Well, you need to be more careful about your clothes tearing up! The way you prance around half-naked so often is an insult to women everywhere!"
"I'll try to..."
All of a sudden, Ryoga leaped into the air, landing on the top of the roof. Ranma turned around quickly, attempting to use the bamboo umbrella to block the attack from Ryoga's elastic, ten-foot-long bandanna. !SWAP!CHIKK! "I'll take that," the lost boy said, wrapping his long bandanna around the umbrella and having it return to him.
"What the..."
"There's nowhere to run, Ranma! Huff!" !SMASH!
"Come on, Akane. Ryoga's using his brute strength to smash this house into splinters. The roof won't hold for long!" the pigtailed girl explained frantically.
"Let go of me! If I'm such a nuisance to you, I'll just leave! Ooh!" As she turned to walk away, Akane came crashing through a weakened part of the roof, barely landing on her feet.
"Never mind her, Ranma. You should be concerned about your own safety right now."
"So it's like that." Ranma came straight for the lost boy, pummeling him. In time both of them were going at it toe to toe, Ranma getting in three strikes for everyone she took.
"That's right, bitch!"
!KAPOW! "Don't call me a bitch!" Ranma demanded, knocking her opponent back several feet with a killer combo.
!CRASH! "Aaagh!"
"Akane, are you all right?!" Ranma called out as she ran away from her downed opponent and the wreckage she had knocked him into.
"Ignore me, will you?!" Ryoga called out to Ranma's departing form. "I'll show you!" Ryoga threw another killer bandanna which went high into the sky and came down just as fast.
"Akane, look out!" Ranma forewarned.
"Shut up, Ranma! I don't care if you're marrying my brother or not! Because as far as I'm concerned, we're total strangers!" Akane screamed, walking away in a huff. !SLICE!
"Uh, oh."
"Gasp!"
As the deadly bandanna came crashing down, slicing a good portion of her long hair off, Akane stood there like a mannequin, staring off into space.
"She's in shock," Ranma stated.
"Of course she's in shock! What do you expect? Caught in public with a haircut like that. She's lucky she didn't just die!" an attractive school girl announced as she and other students walked over to them.
"You should know that! What kind of girl are you?!" another girl interjected, pointing at Ranma rudely.
"She's the kind of girl who can't keep her clothes on! Look at her. Her breasts are bursting out of her clothes as we speak!"
"Ooooh!" some guys swooned, staring at the burgeoning bosom of the redheaded girl.
"Hey! You guys can at least pretend as if you're not staring!" Ranma protested, trying to hold up her torn top. "Anyway, who cares about all that?! What matters right now is Akane!"
"She didn't get an injury, did she?" Ryoga asked, walking over to them and looking to see if Akane was all right.
"I didn't want to hurt, Akane. I heard her when she said she didn't think I was such a bad guy. She's kind of cute too."
"She got a bad haircut from one of your slicing bandannas," Ranma answered, turning towards her previous sparring partner.
"Gasp!" more teenagers from the school exclaimed, regarding Akane's hair.
"All right, Akane. If it will cheer you up, you can go ahead and take a free shot at me," Ranma offered.
"You can hit me too," Ryoga said.
Akane continued to stare off into space until... !SLAP!SLAP!
"Agreeable girl, isn't she?" Ryoga said, his face puffed up from Akane's angry blow.
"Yep."
XXX
Akane walked away, very upset. "Why did my hair have to be cut?! This is all Ranma's fault. I could just beat the daylights out of her! Oooh!" !SMASH! The telephone poll Akane struck caved in a little as Akane realized she had an injury. "Ow! My ankle. I must have tripped as I was running. I'm going to have to see Dr. Tofu."
"Golly. Akane's still mad," Ranma contemplated as she floated in the air quietly, watching the coiffed girl walk off.
XXX
Later in her room, Akane was contemplating some things.
FLASHBACK
"All right, Akane. That will patch you up this time," a young Dr. Tofu said to the ten-year-old little girl.
"Thanks. See you next time, Doctor!"
"Oh, Akane," a gentle voice called out.
"Kasumi! Hi, sis!" Akane replied.
"Were you fighting again?"
"K-Kasumi!"
"Thank you, Doctor, for always tending to my sister."
"Oh! Well, Kasumi. Um. Um," Dr. Tofu staggered.
"Well, thanks again." With that Kasumi took Akane's hand and walked off.
"Akane, why must you act like a boy?" If you don't start acting like a girl, Dr. Tofu will grow to dislike you," the older sister commented.
"If I grow my hair longer, will Dr. Tofu like me the way he likes Kasumi?" the younger Akane thought to herself as her older sister walked her home.
FLASHBACK ENDED
!TAP!TAP!TAP! Akane turned towards her window and saw Ranma there, hanging upside down. Then Akane opened the window. "Um. Are you all right, Akane?"
"What did you think I was doing, crying my eyes out?" Akane answered still sad.
"Well. Um."
"I don't care about my hair; so leave me alone!" !SLAM!
A little later, Akane walked over to where her older sister was doing some housework. "Kasumi?"
"Yes, Akane. How was your day? Oh, my!" Kasumi turned around and gasped at the state of Akane's hair.
"Do you have to overreact to everything, Kasumi?"
"But your hair!"
"I just felt like a change. That's all. Could you help me with it?"
"Sure, Akane."
XXX
Later that day...
"I wonder where Akane went off to?" Ranma thought to herself as she leaped from house to house, eventually flying all over town, in search of the coiffed girl.
"Hey, Ranma!" Kenji called out to her, flying next to her with his ki hammer extended forward. "What's going on? You looking for someone?"
"Yes. Akane went through a bad haircut that shocked her. I was a little concerned about her."
"She went to Dr. Tofu earlier. She's probably on her way home now. Hey, there she is!"
Both of them flew down to where Akane was walking and touched down. "Akane?"
"Yes, Ranma. It's me." Akane sported a new hairstyle with bangs in the front and a few inches long in the back.
"Your hair looks great, Akane," Kenji complemented. "Isn't that right, Ranma?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah! It's nice, Akane."
"You guys really think so?"
"Yeah. You look like a female version of Moe Howard from the Three Stooges but to each his own."
"Ranma," Kenji admonished.
Then Akane's eyes bulged with rage, her ki hammer appearing in her hands. "Ranma!" !SWIPE!WOOSH!
"Take it easy, Akane. I was trying to compliment you!" Ranma said, getting out of the way of Akane's vicious attacks.
"After all the trouble you have put me through you say something bad about my hair?! Ooh! Ooh! You get me so angry!" Akane replied, still swinging.
"It might be better if I let her hit me and allow her to get her rage and anger out of her system," Ranma thought to herself as Akane got closer to her. !WHAM!
"That felt so good!"
"Akane! That was so uncalled for!" !WHAM! "Yeow!"
"I probably shouldn't have knocked Kenji into the sky like that but I was on a roll." Akane thought to herself with a smile. Then she walked home with a spring in her step.
XXX
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Things heat up the next chapter. We'll see you there!
Now I'd like to give props to the people who gave me reviews for the last chapter.
Julianmon, AshK, DrTempo, Riniko22, chm01, wolf40k, Sir Thames, sayalovesdiva, Redzorin, Radio Driver, dana-san, They call me Bruce, luger 7, Kurt Collins
