Gwen walked forward, careful not to startle Morgana, who was in the crystal cave. Morgana looked up the moment Gwen stepped inside. She was silent.
Gwen moved forward and reached out to smooth a hand over one of the larger crystals. "You're right."
Morgana stiffened. "What?"
"I— I'm not sorry about what I said, but I'd like to rephrase my words."
Morgana's eyebrows furrowed. "Okay."
Gwen swallowed and looked away. "I won't pretend to know what it was like for you. I'm not excusing your actions because you made a few terrible ones, but it wouldn't be fair of me to say that you haven't changed. We couldn't have gotten Merlin back without you."
"Don't. I understand. It was foolish of me to—"
Gwen surged forward and wrapped her arms around Morgana, burying her face into her neck. "You make me so angry. I'm usually able to control myself but for some reason, I can't with you."
She pulled away. Morgana's eyes were wide. "What are you saying? You made yourself perfectly clear—"
"You're right. It's been so long. So long and there's really no point in me holding a grudge over you. It's not going to come to anything and you have changed. I don't know what happened in Camelot. And I'm not forgetting it. But I would like to start over. Preferably in a healthy way that doesn't require us killing each other." Gwen chewed on her bottom lip nervously, rocking back on her heels.
"You want to start over?"
Gwen shrugged. "The world's changed. You've changed. You can live your own life now and not be pressured by other forces or destiny or something else. Just be yourself. Be the girl I knew you were before."
Morgana dug her tongue into her cheek. She gave a slight laugh. "You always surprise me, Gwen. I didn't think you were going to forgive me."
"I'm not. But all I'm doing is tiring myself out. So I'm letting it go for myself and for you. I'd like to think that I once knew you. And I know that you never truly wanted me dead. I was just at the wrong place at the wrong time."
Morgana's eyes shone. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so—"
Gwen moved closer and pulled Morgana in again. "Don't prove me wrong. I'm really tired."
"I won't. I won't." Morgana murmured and buried her face into Gwen's neck.
-0-o-0-
Lancelot couldn't help the slow smile that spread over his face at the two of them. He pushed forward, calling out softly. "Gwen."
The two pulled away.
"If you're hungry, we have some lunch outside."
Gwen nodded, furiously wiping away her tears. "Yeah. I'm coming."
Morgana backed away and let Gwen jog over. "I'll be there in a second."
Gwen looped her arm through his and glanced back. "Don't take too long or there will be nothing left."
Lancelot offered Morgana a small smile and then pulled Gwen out into the sunlight. "So, I'm guessing that you two worked things out?"
Gwen hummed softly, leaning into him. "Kind of. I don't want to talk about her right now. We haven't really talked in some time."
Lancelot grinned. "Yeah. Merlin's been hogging all of us."
"I don't blame him." Gwen pulled him to a stop. "I mean, it's been a while."
Lancelot licked his lips. "It has. He's different than back in Camelot. He seems happier."
"Makes sense. There's no destiny or burden hanging over his head. He's free."
"I wonder what happens now. Is he still immortal? Are we going to die or live with him?" Lancelot mused, lancing his fingers with Gwen's.
"Oh, don't. I don't have the energy for that. We're all here right now. And that's all that matters, right?" Gwen moved closer.
"Yeah." Lancelot slipped his hands up carefully cup her jaw. "We're all here right now. And I'm not going anywhere."
Gwen reached up to grip Lancelot's wrists. "You better not."
Lancelot laughed and rocked forward to close the distance between them. Gwen smiled into the kiss and looped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. Lancelot sighed softly and breathed in, trying to memorize the feel of Gwen beneath his palms and the heat of her body against his.
Lancelot tilted his head to deepen the kiss when a loud wolf-whistle interrupted. Gwen stifled a groan and pulled back to see Gwaine wiggling his eyebrows while Elyan just looked very uncomfortable.
Gwaine called out. "Do you want us to save you some food or are you okay with just feasting on each other?"
Elyan scrunched up his face. "Gwaine, oh my god."
Gwen rolled her eyes. "You're one to talk, Gwaine. I didn't think you'd still be hungry after devouring Percy last night."
Elyan mock-gagged and turned away. "I can't believe I'm only friends with couples. I'm going to go hang out with Leon. Come eat or we're finishing it all."
Lancelot snorted and dragged Gwen back in to place a solid kiss on her mouth. "Let's go."
The sun was high in the sky and the group was clustered in a circle right near the shore. Merlin glanced up as they jogged down. "Hey! Where's Morgana?"
Gwen dropped down beside Arthur. "She's coming. What are we eating?"
Arthur grinned and piled some food into a bowl to shove at Lancelot. "Try it."
Lancelot raised a curious eyebrow but tried some of the stew and froze. "Shut up."
Merlin's eyes lit up. "How is it?"
Lancelot shoveled some more into his mouth, much to Gwen's disgust. "Did you make this? Oh my fucking god. I almost forgot."
Gwen reached over and tried some of the stew. "I'm confused. This is the blandest thing I've ever tasted."
Arthur refilled his own bowl. "Have you never had Merlin's stew?"
Gwen furrowed her eyebrows. "No?"
Merlin laughed. "It's not that good, Gwen. It is the same thing I made whenever we camped out on quests and patrols. Brings back old memories."
Gwen stared. "It tastes disgusting, Merlin."
Lancelot rolled his eyes and nudged Gwen. "Don't be mean. It's not that bad. It's all we ever ate and Merlin always made the best. I can't believe you remember how to make it."
"I remember everything, Lance. Don't think I forgot that the lot of you never let me eat."
"Don't be a spoil-sport, Merlin. We always saved you a bowl." Arthur ruffled Merlin's hair and took a dramatic gulp, moaning. "It's so good."
Gwaine quickly caught on and refilled his bowl. "Mmmm. Merlin, really. You ought to try it—"
Merlin stared at him for a moment. "I can't believe you guys."
Gwen wrinkled her nose. "I'm so confused."
"They're all bullies, Gwen. I should've poisoned their food a while ago." Merlin muttered, standing up.
Arthur groaned and pulled at Merlin's shirt. "Hey, come on. We're joking."
Merlin turned back and crouched down so he was level with him. "It's not funny. Growing up, I never had anything to eat."
Arthur's face sobered quickly. "Merlin—"
Merlin cut him off, kissing him harshly. "Don't be a prat. Just don't do it again. I'm going to go get Morgana."
Merlin was up and out of there before Arthur could reply. Lancelot furrowed his eyebrows, glancing between Gwaine and Arthur. "What is wrong with you guys? Since when did we take away his food?"
Arthur pouted. "It was after you died. I didn't think he took it personally."
Gwen flicked Arthur's forehead. "I can't believe Merlin even loves you."
-0-o-0-
Morgana was sitting on the ground, watching the crystals when Merlin crept in. "I hate crystals. Seeing the future is never a good thing."
Morgana didn't turn around or so much as flinch at Merlin's voice. "What about the past? It's funny how when you rewatch things, you realize what an idiot you were."
Merlin settled onto the ground beside her. "I know what you mean."
"I don't deserve your forgiveness. None of theirs." Morgana muttered.
"Don't be selfish, Morgana. That's not up to you."
She glanced up and Merlin was a bit taken aback by the redness of her eyes. "The things I did. I can't even believe that—" She cut herself off.
"You were manipulated. That doesn't excuse your actions but the first step is realizing that you made a mistake. I should've helped you. Or at least made that sure that you weren't alone. I failed at a lot of things and I accept that. But sitting here and moping about it isn't going to help. That's what I did the first few days after I woke up." Merlin said, inching closer to her.
"How did you forgive me?"
"I didn't do it for you. I did it for me and for the rest of us. And honestly, all that matters is that you forgive yourself. Admit that you did something wrong and work to be better. You don't need forgiveness for that." Merlin whispered. "Come on outside. They'll finish all the food."
"But—"
"None of us are innocent, Morgana. We all fucked up. Now, are you going to get out there and make things right, or sulk in here for eternity?"
Morgana clenched her teeth and met Merlin's gaze. He stood up and offered out a hand. Morgana hesitated, her expression uncertain. After three full heartbeats, she slid her hands into his and allowed him to pull her up. Merlin moved closer and pressed a feather-light kiss to her cheek. "Come on. You must be starving."
Morgana pulled back, stilling Merlin. "I just— I wanted to say that— thank you." She stammered out.
Merlin's heart nearly broke. Morgana, through everything, had always been confident and self-assured and to see her so self-conscious was just wrong. Merlin reached over and tipped her chin up. "Thank you."
Morgana's lips twitched and Merlin dragged her out of the cave. "You ready?"
She shot a sideways glance at him and squeezed his hand. "I was born ready."
Merlin snorted. "Dramatic, are you?"
"You're one to talk," Morgana smirked and pulled Merlin along.
-0-o-0-
Merlin stifled a laugh, snorting at the sight before him. "How long was I gone?"
Morgana snickered, watching as Lancelot knocked the sword out of Gwaine's hand and toppled him to the ground.
"Getting rusty are you?" Merlin called out, dragging Morgana down.
Gwaine muttered something under his breath and launched himself to his feet. "We need to talk. I never meant to—"
Merlin marched forward and patted his cheek. "I know. Let it go. It's okay."
"You should've told me if you didn't like it. We were just joking."
Merlin snatched Gwaine's sword. "I think we need to talk less about the past and more about your atrocious sword skills."
Arthur gave a sudden laugh. "You're one to talk. All those training sessions that I put you through and you still can't hold a sword."
Merlin grinned, and reached his hand out, seeking out Excalibur. Gwen had told him that they lost their swords when they first arrived but Merlin easily sought out Excalibur's energy.
Merlin grasped Excalibur and tossed it to Arthur, who looked dumbfounded at the sudden appearance. "It's like Thor's hammer, huh?"
Arthur twisted the sword with his hand. "I'm sorry, what?"
Merlin grinned and lifted up Gwaine's sword. "Where did these come from?"
"Ascalon got them for us. Bit rusty but they do. We were bored and wanted to see if we were still any good." Gwaine said, collapsing on Percival, who ran a sympathetic hand through his hair.
Arthur twisted Excalibur on his grip and grinned up at Merlin. "This is as good as new. You think you can hold up against me?"
Merlin quirked his lips up. "I would like to find out."
Arthur hesitated and then lunged forward. Merlin, unfortunately, had severely underestimated his own skills and lost his grip in under a minute. Arthur raised an eyebrow, looming over him. "You were saying?"
"Come on, Arthur. We all know what Merlin's useless with a sword. Why don't you fight someone who knows what they're doing." Morgana drawled, pulling Merlin to his feet and taking his sword.
Arthur tilted his head, twirling Excalibur. "Are you offering?"
Morgana grinned and for a moment, Merlin was taken aback by the light in her eyes. She leaped forward and Arthur barely caught the strike on the hilt of his sword. Merlin scrambled out of the way as the two fought. Merlin had nearly forgotten that they two grew up and trained together. Both were rusty but they balanced each other out perfectly.
Arthur was strong and precise, his hair matted with sweat and eyes hard and concentrated. Morgana, on the other hand, flowed like water. She easily ducked and attacked without a moment's hesitation or thought. Her grin was wicked and her eyes were bright.
Morgana pulled back the slightest bit and twisted her sword just enough to push Arthur back and knock the sword from his hand. Arthur ducked and tackled her to the ground but Morgana was faster and flipped them over until she was essentially straddling him.
Arthur gasped, his breaths coming heavy. "What the hell was that?"
Morgana leaned forward, her lips curled. "Don't think I don't know your moves, Arthur. How many times did I beat you growing up?"
Arthur scoffed. "That never happened."
Morgana laughed and rolled off Arthur to stand up. She offered out a hand that Arthur gladly accepted. Morgana smirked and brushed some dirt from his shoulders. "You keep telling yourself that."
Arthur's eyes suddenly went soft. "I've missed you."
Morgana raised her chin up. "Yeah, well. I'm going anywhere."
-0-o-0-
Merlin watched the golden light dance over the water and he thought of his golden crown and golden hair and golden heart. He let out a sigh and flopped down on the grass, watching the bright sky, his mind wandering to his bright bright blue eyes.
"Merlin." Arthur appeared over him, blocking the sun. "Are you zoning out again?"
He still couldn't believe that there was a time when he wouldn't have recognized the face before him.
Arthur crouched down and waved a hand over his face. "Earth to Merlin. Have you already forgotten me?"
Merlin pushed himself up and leaned on his palms, a teasing smile curling over his lips. "I wish."
Arthur swayed closer. "You don't mean that. I'm most definitely worth remembering, aren't I?"
Merlin thought back to when he first stepped into Camelot, onto the training field, and into Arthur's heart. Merlin had lived thousands upon thousands of lives. He'd met thousands upon thousands of people. But none of those memories were worth anything in comparison to the few ones he'd made with the man before him. Merlin knew that through everything, Arthur's life was the best part of his, no matter how incredibly long.
And he honestly didn't know how long the two of them had together in this new world, but Merlin was willing to spend every last second with him.
"Don't worry your pretty head about it." Merlin grinned, leaning forward to press feather-light kisses over Arthur's nose and jaw. "Your life is the only one worth remembering."
Arthur tilted his chin up and forced Merlin's light kisses to trail to his mouth. "Not my life. Our life."
"If you're done with being disgustingly romantic with each other then come down to the tower. Morgana wants to show us something." Elyan yelled from over the hill.
Arthur stood up and dragged Merlin to his feet. "Come on, then. Stop brooding."
"I'm not brooding, Arthur. I'm just happy." Merlin said, meeting Arthur's gaze.
Arthur's eyes flicked over Merlin's face for a moment before breaking out in a smile. "Well, come on then. Let's go down."
Merlin leaned dangerously close, stifling a chuckle when Arthur went cross-eyed. "Ok. Let's go."
Merlin pulled away and bolted up the hill. Arthur stood frozen for a moment before shocking himself into reality. "Oi, Merlin. Wait up!"
Merlin turned around, jogging backward, his smile more blinding than the sun could ever be. "Come catch me."
And so Arthur ran after him, just like he always did. And if he tackled Merlin into a kiss at the bottom of the hill, then that was for no one to remember but themselves.
fin.
