May 2022 AN: Despite stating that she is female in the prologue, multiple reviewers have complained about not knowing her gender/assaulting me in PMs about political shit, which is why I've been away for over a year. I lost all motivation to write after constantly being hounded and insulted in PMs. If you don't like the story, don't read it, but there is absolutely no need to attack me as a person just because this fic wasn't for you. Sorry for the mini rant, anyways, the MC is, and always has been, female. Hopefully that clears up confusion about that.
Chapter 1
[Welcome, Player!]
"What the fuck...?!" I shake my head and immediately regret it, pain spiking through my skull. "A migraine, lovely..." I mumble to myself before I glance down and mildly note that I'm not wearing clothes, aside from a weird necklace but I really don't think that counts, which makes me groan in frustration. "Great, this situation just keeps getting better and better." I lift my gaze back up to the floating white box in front of me, deciding that I might as well go along with whatever the fuck is going on. At least it will keep me from thinking about the fact that, oh I don't know, I just died!
"Uh... hello?" I wave my hand in front of the box, but nothing happens. Trying again, this time I try to touch the box directly and get assaulted by a loud ding! noise.'Fuck you too box, that totally helps my migraine!' I give it the stink eye and realize the box has gotten bigger. I quickly skim over the new text and let out a bewildered noise before letting out a scream of rage as the message registers in my mind.
[Welcome, Player!]
[Due to walking through traffic (lol idiot) and getting hit by [The Almighty Truck-Kun], you have received the skill [Truck-Kun's Blessing]!]
[Due to the effects of the skill [Truck-Kun's Blessing], you have been reincarnated at a random location. Current location is [Babel Dungeon - 20th Floor.]
[The effect [Get isekai'd, lol] from passive skill [Truck-Kun's Blessing], has also granted access to your own personalized [System], have fun and good luck! You're going to need it!]
[Would you like to access the [System]'s tutorial? Y/N]
After finishing a short temper tantrum of rolling back and forth on the floor, I sit up and lean back on my palms, arms outstretched behind me. "Ahhh, why me...?" I sigh heavily before pulling my gaze back down to my [System] from the very high and glowing pink ceiling. 'Seriously, why the fuck is the ceiling pink of all colors?'
"[Yes]."
[Tutorial initiated, please pay attention, as after you have completed the tutorial you will lose all access to it. [01:59:42] remains of [Tutorial Mode].]
[Page 1]
[The [System] can be accessed and commanded through directed mental commands. This feature was implemented so stealth status would not be broken by speaking aloud. Basically, don't talk to yourself out loud dumbass.]
Reading the insulting line causes my eye to start twitching until I take a moment to calm myself down, closing my eyes and letting out a heavy sigh through my nose. 'Don't let it provoke you, don't let it provoke you... Nope, didn't help.' Sighing again I level a glare on the [System] and continue reading the tutorial.
[Please use this method from now on, as once the tutorial has been completed, the [Perfect Stealth] status shall be removed from the player.]
[As the player has spawned in the randomized location [Babel Dungeon - 20th Floor], the player has started on [Nightmare Mode]. To escape the dungeon the player must descend to the next [Exit Gate] which will teleport the player out of the dungeon.]
[A warning to the player, unknown mortals may attack on sight. Suggested method of procedure is to avoid all contact. In simplified terms, try not to get PK'd scrub.]
[As the player has started on [Nightmare Mode], all stats are set to minimum and must be increased through training, XP gain, or combat. No skill points will be distributed for the player to use as they wish.]
[Current combat capability is 5. Suggested combat capability for [Babel Dungeon - 20th Floor] is a minimum of 1600. In other words, you're fucked, you should hope you don't spawn in a dungeon next time :)]
[Next Page]
'Fffffffff...' I bury my face in my hands looking at the suggested combat capabilities compared to what mine are. '...uuck my life. What is with my shitty luck. Such misfortune...'
Please hold while the protagonist curls up in a ball and cries.
/Line Break/
20 minutes later
And now, back to our regularly scheduled program!
I moan in discomfort from my fetal position on the floor before rolling onto my back and groaning in pain from staying in one position for so long. 'Fuck, my legs are asleep.' I slowly try to move my legs as I sit up and let out a little squeak from the uncomfortable feeling of my legs waking up. I sigh and massage my legs while I turn my gaze back to my [System]. '[Next Page].' I direct while squinting at the screen through my bleary eyes.
[Page 2]
[To open your [Status] page and check your stats, skills, spells and equipment, use the command [Status]. Before checking your status, please note that the tutorial and thus [Perfect Stealth] has [01:35:56] left. Ensure that you are in a safe location for when these run out.]
Shoving all my panicked and traumatized thoughts to the back of my mind, I nod to myself after reading the notification, and quickly glance around before I realize I'm in the middle of an open clearing surrounded by trees. Having massaged my calves awake I stand on slightly wobbly legs before picking the direction that leads to the closest dungeon wall and beginning to walk. I look back down to the screen and continue to read as I walk, the [System] luckily being semitransparent so I won't unexpectedly trip.
[Please open your [Status] page and the [System] will guide you through your stats, skills, etc.]
'[Status].' I think glumly as I shuffle along through the forest, thankful for the moss-covered floor protecting my bare feet.
[Below is your [Status], note that your stats suck, n00b. You can grind skill points through combat situations, training in certain aspects as well as getting 1 free point per level in every stat that is not 0. Completing certain actions may also award points in specific stats. [System] notes will be next to the corresponding items in the format of '- [Description]']
[Status]
[Name: Sana Ljos Alf] [Level: 1] [XP: 0/100] - [XP can only be gained through combat victories. So just, don't die lol.]
[Race: High Elf] - [Fancy ears are fancy~! ;)]
[Sex: Female] - [Careful not to get r****d by PKers, mmmkay?]
[Age: 13] - [u smol. Lol, midget.]
[Titles] - [Titles can be gained through completing specific actions and have effects that can be seen once an observation skill is a high enough level.]
[Exhibitionist] - [Put on some clothes you pervert!]
[HP: 10] 0.6HP/min - [Health points, lose em all and ur dead.]
[MP: 0] 0MP/min - [Mind points, used for spooky scary magics. Don't hit 0 when casting spells or you will induce the debuff [Mind Down].]
[SP: 1] 0.35SP/min - [Stamina points, Gotta go fast!]
[ : 1] - [Physical Attack, base stat used for your fisticuffs, and added to base weapon damage if you have one equipped.]
[ : 0] - [Magic Attack, base stat added to base spell damage/healing upon casting.]
[DEF: 1] - [Defense, reduces taken physical damage by base stat.]
[RES: 0] - [Resistance, reduces taken magical damage by base stat.]
[Stats]
[Strength: 1] - [Get lots to be Stronk.]
[Vitality: 1] - [Eat your vegetables kids!]
[Endurance: 1] - [Could be your sexual endurance or could just be how long you can fight/run/whatever. Who knows...? Either way you don't have much of it. :)]
[Dexterity: 0] - [You don't masturbate much do you? Even though you're a pervert...]
[Agility: 0] - [Sanic. 'Nuff said.]
[Intelligence: 0] - [lol idiot.]
[Magic: 0] - [You ain't no Doctor Strange that's for sure!]
[Luck: -2] - [Rest in peace. ;)]
[Sub menus] - [Use the following commands for [Skills], [Spells], and [Equipment]. Who knows, you might unlock more at some point. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯]
[Skills]
[Spells]
[Equipment]
[You may now have the [System] guide you through your submenus or you can choose to skip to the next page. [01:15:21] left until the tutorial time limit is up and [Perfect Stealth] is removed.]
[Previous Page | Next Page]
I glance around me before looking over the floating [System] box in front of me, noting that I've gotten quite a bit closer to the dungeon wall. 'Hmmm...' I tilt my head from side to side, still walking through the forest, trying to decide if I should check the submenus. 'It should be pretty self-explanatory, right? [Next page]!'
[Page 3]
[You have chosen to skip a portion of the tutorial. Are you an idiot? Oh wait, you have 0 Intelligence, of course you are. It's your life to waste I guess lol.]
"Oi." My eye twitches violently as I stare at the [System] screen. "You suggested it you useless [System]!"
[The [System] has detected that the player is insulting the [System]. Tutorial forcefully ended. 10 points have been deducted from the Luck stat. Have a nice day. :)]
I stop dead in my tracks and stare disbelievingly at the floating screen in front of me.
"Fuck."
