Fields Of Jasmine

Chapter 19 ~ The Thing With Mates

Bursting through the bathroom door, Dean Winchester came to a halt right in the doorway. His gaze landing on the only breathing being beside himself in the small room, sitting slumped over on the toilet bowl, head in hands.

"Sammy?" Dean asked, eyeing the pitiful looking figure. The light blue gown had slid apart at his back, where it was only held together by two thin strings of fabric around his neck. The IV pole stood beside him and the bag with sunny-yellow liquid beside his feet.

Dean was by Sam's side in one large stride and kneeled down before him. He pushed Sam's hands away and cupped the omega's face in his.

"What the hell are you even thinkin'?" Dean spat at him in a mixture of worry and anger. Sam wasn't supposed to get up all by himself. "Did you get here all by yourself?" Of course he had … what a question. Dean hadn't been there and he surely wouldn't call anyone else to help him with THAT. Hell, he wasn't even sure if Sam would tell him. Sam looked a bit dazed and utterly exhausted, his skin clammy and warm beneath the thin layer of sweat.

He swallowed his anger down and pressed his lips into a tight line, biting back another remark of how stupid Sam was.

He could've fallen.

He could've hurt himself.

The alpha blew out a long slow breath and closed his eyes for a moment, counting to ten. When he opened them again, his emotions had calmed down a bit and he felt himself steady enough to not bark or yell at the omega.

"I'm gonna unplug your I.V," he said, looking deep into those huge hazel-green eyes.

Sam gave him a shaky nod.

His mate did as he had said and then removed the whole I.V. since he didn't have a stopper to close it. He helped Sam get cleaned up, since he hadn't been able to do so himself and scooped him up in his arms afterwards.

Slowly but surely, and taking care to not dislodge the catheter, Dean brought him back into the room and laid him on the bed. Sam's gown rode up his smooth looking thighs and hips and Dean did everything possible in his mind to not look THERE.

The omega definitely had one hell of a manhood. Though … there were no balls. It kinda looked weird that way, Dean had to admit, and he was glad that the omega was too out of it to notice his stare.

Dean cleared his throat and pulled the sheets back up over Sam's body after hanging the urine-bag back in its place and pushed the nurse's button. He snuck his arm under Sam's shoulders and adjusted his limp body so that he looked more comfortable.

A moment later, the door to the room opened and Becca appeared with a questioning gaze. "Yeah?" she asked.

"Sam was on the toilet. We accidentally ripped the I.V. out," he explained, not feeling the need to mention that the omega had thought he could go there all by himself.

"No problem," she said and smiled softly at him, but her face darkened when her gaze landed on the omega. "Should I get Doctor Cavenaugh?"

Dean huffed out a breath. He wasn't sure himself. "Yeah. Guess that's a good idea." What else was he supposed to say? After all, they were in a hospital with real doctors and nurses, so why not have an extra careful watch over Sam and his health.

Sam barely held onto consciousness. His eyelids felt heavy and he felt the strong pull of sleep at his mind as soon as he laid flat on the bed, covered by the sheets.

Dean hovered over him, impossibly close. The alpha's lips where moving, but all Sam was able to understand where slurred words and all he saw where blurry green eyes, which wouldn't come into focus.

"You know what they said. You're not supposed to get up all by yourself. What if you've fallen? What if you've gotten hurt?" Dean hissed angrily. "That's not a game." He knew that Sam knew that it wasn't a game, but he needed his mate to understand that there was no way that he'd allow him to be that reckless with himself. Not after he had barely survived that parasite.

Even when he didn't understand what his alpha was saying, Sam could smell his anger and he heard by the sound of his voice that he wasn't happy.

Well, Sam wasn't happy too.

Dean dropped his head and exhaled audibly. The omega didn't understand. He was too out of it. Too exhausted. Too miserable. Too high on pain-meds.

Dean opened his mouth to add something, but got cut off by the door swinging open and Doctor Cavenaugh entering.

"What's the matter?" he asked instantly, still a couple of feet away from the bed.

Dean turned towards him, while Sam didn't even seem to notice. "Sam had to go … you know..." Dean chuckled nervously. "I got him back into bed, but he started to sweat and pass out on me..."

Cavenaugh was right beside the bed now and checked Sam's pupils and pulse. "Nothing to worry about, though. You might start with something easier the next time you wanna get up, kid," he spoke to the youngest among them. "Becca's gonna get you a wheelchair and … don't overdo yourself." Now he looked straight at Dean, emphasizing his words with a stern glare. "No wandering around too far."

Dean gave him an understanding nod. "I'll take care of it." So yeah, he might need to have Ellen or Bobby to be here when he'd go and get a shower later on, making sure that his omega wouldn't get any wrong ideas all over again.

The doctor set up a new I.V. and Becca brought another saline drip with pain-meds. Fifteen minutes later, Sam was out for the count and Dean took the smaller cup of coffee and the bag with the doughnuts and crawled onto his half of the bed, where he ate breakfast and sighed every now and then, thinking about what could've possibly convinced Sam to do that.

Then again … why did it matter?

Everyone in the right mind wouldn't want to have someone watching. Especially not if you were so very different from the rest. It was, in fact, legit.

When he was done and had thrown out the empty cup and greasy papers, he lay down contentedly and toed off his boots and kicked them off the bed. The ex-hunter then hummed, satisfied and sated, and inched closer to Sam's side. Once lying shoulder to shoulder, he intertwined his fingers with Sam's and let his eyes flutter shut.

He couldn't believe how fulfilling it felt to be that close to Sam, to have him right there beside him, being able to touch him … It felt like heaven on earth and so much better …

This was all he'd ever need. Right there beside him. His whole world was here in this room with him.

~ 67' Chevrolet Impala ~

Dean Winchester had fallen asleep soon after lying down and woke up again an hour later to a soft knock on the door. He stirred and sniffed and rubbed with his free hand over his face.

"Yeah?" he croaked out hoarsely and glanced at Sam.

The omega was still out cold, not stirring a bit.

The door opened, and Bobby came in, ball cap and plastic-bags in his hands. The grizzled man kicked the door closed with his foot and made a gruff noise.

Dean turned to his side and cocked his head back to get a better look at the old man.

Bobby squinted back at him through bushy eyebrows and put the bags on the already overfilled nightstand.

"Sam's doing better-" Dean spoke up before the older man could even think about asking. "He was up already."

Bobby huffed out a breath. "Heard 'bout that. Didn't go very well, huh?" He gestured towards the sleeping omega.

The ex hunter chuckled and shook his head. "Nah. You mind if I'm gonna have a shower as long as you're here?"

Bobby eyed his younger friend and pursed his lips. "'Bout time you jump the shower, boy. You look awful … and you stink."

Dean squinted at him and then sniffed at himself. Well, the old man may was right. He kind of stunk … and he sure didn't look very well. Though, since Sam didn't seem to care those past days, why should he?

Bobby gestured towards the bags. "Clothes. Hope they'll fit."

Dean gave him a thankful nod and then forced himself to get into motion and get himself into the bath of his omega's room. Inside the plastic bag Bobby had brought with him wasn't just clothes. There was a razor and shower gel, and a toothbrush and paste, so he wouldn't have to use the scratchy ones from the hospital.

With a sigh, he pulled the curtain aside and eyed the big stall. Dean loved his bathtub and the small shower he had in the cabin, but hell, it'd feel amazing to have just that tiny more bit space while showering and he wouldn't bump his elbows on the tiles, or have to bow down, to get his hair soaked.

With a content smile, he got undressed and turned the shower on.

~ 67' Chevrolet Impala ~

The next day wasn't very different from the past ones. The only change was that Becca had told Sam that he was allowed to take a shower and that the omega seemed pretty determined to do just that. Even when he looked kind of unsure on how he was supposed to do that. At least that seemed to be his very second thought after the cheerful news the nurse had brought them.

She told him and Dean to call for her, when Sam was ready and that she'd help him. Though, Dean – ever the alpha – instantly told her that it wouldn't be necessary and that he'd help Sam in every way he'd need it, without even asking the omega if it was okay that he'd help him, and that he'd see him naked. He spoke without even looking at Sam for permission.

Though, when Becca was gone, and the two of them were alone again and Dean looked over at Sam, who had a bit more color in his face and whose eyes seemed to be alive just that tiny bit more than the day before, he noticed that his overprotective behavior might not be the best thing to act on.

"Sam..." he sighed. "I can get her back, okay? If you wanna have her helping you, it's fine with me." His words sounded reproachful.

The omega chewed on his bottom lip and swallowed thickly. He looked away shyly and bit his bottom lip. When he cast his big eyes back up at Dean, his lips parted slightly – like a fucking porn star about to say something filthy. But he didn't, actually. It was just the way Sam was. Looking all vulnerable and innocent and so damn young and … like Sam.

Dean Winchester felt kind of dirty to think about the omega this way.

Especially now. The kid just had surgery. He was still healing. And they sure as hell hadn't shared THAT kind of intimate before, which would rationalize thoughts like that.

Though, Dean Winchester couldn't possibly not feel the anticipation of helping Sam out and maybe even helping him wash. Not that this was sexy in any way. Hell no. Not that someone would get second thoughts about what the Winchester was thinking.

His first priority was to help Sam feel better with a shower and getting cleaned up.

"You're my mate, right?" Sam's voice was soft and he sounded so damn insecure, as if someone was trying to lure him into the lion's den by talking him into it as if it was no biggie at all.

Dean chuckled nervously. Of course Sam felt what he felt. It was going both ways. While the alpha scented the omega's insecurity and nervousness and shame, the omega had to smell the mix of love, possessiveness, and horniness in his scent.

"I won't do anything. Promise." Dean could read in between the lines. Though they had known each other for quite some time now and though they had made out plenty, Sam still seemed shy and afraid at times, as if Dean was just waiting for a moment to jump him.

He couldn't blame him for that either.

"I won't even look," Dean added after a long moment of silence with a cocky grin. "Not if you don't want me to." He would've bit his tongue off. Even when it was meant as a joke, he couldn't be sure if Sam would understand it as such.

Not now at least.

Sam eyed him curiously. His scent shifted and something bitter mixed into the sweetness of jasmine and earthy moss.

The alpha's cocky grin faltered and his features turned serious. This wasn't what he had wanted. He had wanted to make Sam smile, what had – in fact – been way easier before all of this had happened. Before they had known.

Dean wanted for Sam to not be that sad and broody, since he had woken up.

"Look. I'm sorry, Sammy," he said calmly and reached out to cup the omega's cheek. "I … I didn't mean it that way, okay?" He wanted Sam to understand. He needed him to understand.

Sam's lips quirked into a small smile. "I know," he breathed and leaned into the gentle touch.

"Good," he said, though the both of them knew that the both of them knew that it wasn't like that. Not that easy …

"You okay with me helping you? Or should I get Becca?" he asked again, this time completely serious and not putting any emotion into his words. He was completely honest about it and he wanted Sam to be honest too.

Sam's hazel-green circles locked with Dean's forest-green ones.

"Sammy?" he asked when he didn't get an answer.

"It's okay if it's you," Sam whispered, laying all the trust he could muster into his voice when he spoke.

Dean wouldn't give him time to let him have second thoughts. "Okay. So … how do you want to do this?" This time he let Sam think and gave him space to let him sort this out.

After a very long while, Sam spoke, his cheeks tainted a slight pink. "I'd … Pee first?" He peeked up under bangs of dark hair.

"Sure." The most charming smile the world had ever seen on a Winchester's face lit up the whole room, shining deep into Sam's soul and heart. Dean didn't jump on the train of shyness and embarrassment of Sam's. Instead he decided to handle those topics like they weren't anything embarrassing or special at all.

Dean gave Sam time to sit up by himself, but was at his side as soon as he rose to his feet and got his arm around his waist to steady him. Sam's knees felt wobbly and his legs felt as if they weren't able to carry his weight, but he had his alpha guiding him, holding him.

Together, they managed to get into the bathroom, where Dean let him have his privacy while peeing. When Sam called, he went back in and squatted down before him.

"Lets get the show on the road, huh?" He still smiled charmingly.

Sam could do nothing but nod and give him a shy smile back, casting his look down to hide his face, and especially the scar.

Dean kept his voice soft and his touches gentle. "I'll help you, 'kay?" He asked, but was already reaching around to untie the knot in Sam's hospital gown. When Sam didn't respond and only shuddered at the feather-light brush of knuckles against the bare skin of his neck, Dean decided to get the man's thoughts off of whatever he was thinking about right now. "Bobby brought clothes for ya'. Comfortable ones." He brushed the fabric down Sam's shoulders and let go of it.

The thin gown slid down the younger man's bicep and pooled around his elbows. Sam kept his gaze down, trying to steady his thumping heart and shaking hands.

"If you're askin' me, Ellen went to get them for ya'," he continued, as he took Sam's hand into his and removed the gown completely. The alpha let it drop to the floor beside the toilet. "I bet she got colors matchin' your eyes and skin tone." Dean chuckled. He was starting to feel a bit nervous, as if Sam's insecurity was affecting him too now.

The omega didn't say a word. He only ducked his head, his hands shaking even more now that he was truly naked and nothing stayed uncovered from Dean's eyes.

He knew that the alpha must've seen him like this before, at least once, when they prepared him for surgery. He could vaguely remember that Dean had laid him out on some hard surface and had promised him that it'd be alright and that he undressed him … that it was cold and despite that he had felt hot.

"You ready?"

Sam hesitated, but nodded. Sure he was ready to take a shower, but he wasn't ready to show himself – consciously – to Dean, with all his … weirdness.

"You're a bit skinny," Dean poked with his finger into Sam's ribs, which were clearly visible under a layer of skin. "But other than that … you're right up my alley." Of course this didn't help ease the mood either. The alpha cleared his throat and sighed. He dropped his head and looked up again, then brushed thick strands of hair out of the omega's face and tugged it behind his ear. Right there, where his scar should've stayed hidden.

"You … you don't have to be embarrassed, Sunshine. You know that, right?" the alpha's words edged on concern. "You've all the right things in all the right places." He smiled broadly at him. "It's just a bit too little, you know? We need to get you proper meals and shit. A whole lot of rest."

"It's not over, is it?" Sam asked hoarsely and looked up at the ex-hunter.

Dean gave him a reassuring smile. "For you it is, okay? You shouldn't think about that anymore. You're out of it and that's a good thing. Now you've had time to recover and rest and we'll help you … okay? The things that happened … that's over."

Sam sucked on his lower lip. He didn't believe Dean. For the hunters, it wouldn't be over until they found the baby and maybe even killed it and all the others that were born that way. Including the demon-girl.

There was a brush of cool air when Dean stood up and walked over to the shower to turn the water on.

He returned to his mate's side and helped him to his feet. He only hesitantly let go of him so he could enter the stall by himself. He watched Sam curiously, not sure if he'd be able to stay in there on his own.

Sam didn't pull the shower curtain closed and Dean didn't intend to do it for him. He didn't look in Sam's direction much at all.

He only stole glances at the showering younger male, making sure that he was still standing and doing okay. Well, at least as okay as possible.

When the water turned off, Dean went for the towels. He dropped one of them onto the floor and held the second one out for Sam. When it was taken from his hands, Dean turned to face away and give Sam his privacy, relying on an indication from Sam; he'd call out if he'd need something. The ex-hunter wouldn't leave the room, though, just in case.

Sam braced himself against the tiles until he thought to have a safer stance and started to dry himself off. It didn't last long, though. The moist, warm air, the stress of having to stay upright, and his hurting lower abdomen were taking their toll on him.

Dark spots started to dance before his vision and darkness started to creep in from the corners of his sight. He reached out for the sink and held onto it, breathing hard.

Of course that wasn't lost on his mate. "Sammy."

"Dean? … I think … some help? Please?" he whispered breathlessly, trying to hold onto consciousness as long as humanly possible.

The omega didn't have to ask twice. Dean was in front of him, holding him up. He guided him over to the toilet and let him sit down on it and took over the task of getting Sam's body dry. Ever so carefully, he rubbed over the omega's hair as if he'd hurt him if he'd go too rough.

They didn't say a single word all the while, nor did they look each other in the eyes until Sam was dressed.

When the navy-green boxers and dark sweats were on those long legs, he made the omega stand up and hold onto his shoulders. Dean then dragged the boxers up, taking exquisite care to get everything inside on the front. His knuckles brushed over smooth, warm skin and firm muscles at Sam's back. The omega's skin felt incredibly smooth and soft. When he reached down again for the sweats, his palms slid down the outsides of Sam's thighs and calves.

Oh god, how good it would be to feel his skin for a little while longer. How it would feel to have Sam mostly naked and soft beside him, being able to touch …

Dean had to stop himself right there again. Sam shivered as calloused palms traveled down his sides. He bit his lower lip and his grip on Dean's shoulders tightened a bit. It felt good to be touched like that by the alpha, the heat of his palms and the strength hidden behind all this tenderness.

He'd love to have the alpha touch him more like that. It made his skin crawl and tickle.

It felt like Dean was made for him, as if the man was all he needed to feel better …

Dean then walked him out of the bathroom. They barely had made it across the doorway when Sam started to lean heavily against his mate's side and grip onto the back of his shirt, as his knees started to get even wobblier.

It were only a few more feet towards the bed, but Sam's legs seemed ready to give up on him at any moment. So Dean simply scooped him up in his arms, bridal style, and carried him over to the bed, where he laid him down.

The younger man didn't protest, exhausted from the small tasks he had done in the bathroom and ready to take another nap.

If it wasn't for Dean and his need to make Sam eat, he might have even fallen asleep. But the ex-hunter was there and he wouldn't leave the omega be until he'd had a second breakfast.

"What do we got today?" Sam asked sleepily.

Dean wiggled with his eyebrows and grabbed the small paper bag from the nightstand and handed it to Sam. "Muffins. Double chocolate chip and caramel," he informed him.

The omega chuckled and sniffed. "Yeah?"

"Yeah, baby boy." He waited for Sam to open the bag and look inside. "One for me. One for you."

Sam's smile widened a bit. "Nice."

"Nice?" Dean's voice high-pitched. "Nice? I'm freaking awesome, kiddo. I got Bobby to get us those from the bakery across town." Then he chuckled and shook his head. He then waved with his hand towards the bag, gesturing towards Sam to give him one too.

Sam tugged the bag closer. "Am I supposed to share with you?" he asked jokingly, his eyes glinting. Actually, he was too tired for a pillow fight over muffins with Dean, but he sure could try to tease.

"You darin' me?" Dean wiggled his eyebrows.

The omega blew out a soft breath and put the bag between the both of them after pulling his muffin one out. "Nah." He leaned back against the propped up pillow and sighed heavily.

"You eat first," Dean said. "Then we'll talk about you having a nap." He smiled.

"Deal," Sam grinned at him.

"Sealed with a kiss?" The alpha asked mischievously.

Sam blushed. Again.

Dean took that as a yes and sat down beside his mate. He then sealed his lips over Sam's and pulled him into a lingering, loving kiss. There wasn't a lot of tongue, but hell, Sam tasted divine … Even like this. Barely licking into the other man's mouth … it tasted like so much more.

For both of them.

. to be continued