Ava sat at the edge of the bed, dangling her legs off the edge. Her body had groaned at the mere movement of sitting up, but she could feel it was quickly gaining her old strength. She took a deep breath. Her father had just left the room to confer with the healers about her new "condition", and she was taking the opportunity to savor the moment alone. She didn't feel ill, yet her sister and father had acted like something was seriously wrong with her. As simply as possible, they had explained that Ava had seemingly forgotten the last 400 years of her life. She hadn't come of age recently, that had happened some time ago. She was now married, the wife of the King of Mirkwood – this made her Queen of Mirkwood.

Ava shook her head in disbelief. She apparently didn't even know herself. She had never had any inclination to get married. She definitely knew she wanted a life free of constraints. She couldn't reconcile these desires with what her life was now: married, royal duties. Thinking about the life she now found herself in was making her frustrated – who is this person I've become?

"Ava?" a soft voice called behind her. A figure emerged from behind the heavy door leading into the bedroom. The elf was tall, with long blond hair, and an unmistakable regal bearing. Though he wore no crown, he strode with dignity and authority.

Tired with the intrusions by people she did not know, Ava did not mince words. "Who the hell are you? I asked to be alone."

Thranduil was taken aback by his wife's forcefulness, he had not seen her abrasiveness in years.

"I'm Thranduil. I wanted to see if you need anything. Everything must be a shock to you" Thranduil replied.

Ava sighed. "You're my husband." She said the word husband with disdain. It was clear Ava was not happy about it at all.

"Aye, I am. I know this is not what you were expecting but your family and I are here for you. We're going to be here to help you through this" Thranduil said kindly.

"You don't know what I'm thinking. Imagine waking up and your life is totally changed." Ava snapped.

Thranduil, remaining ever so patient, responded "it is changed for the better – you have a family who loves you Ava."

"I can't be married. I would have never done this. It's not poss-" Ava stopped in mid-sentence. A light shone in her eyes, it was flickering off something on her hand. She raised her left hand to examine the object, it shocked her into silence. On her finger was an engagement ring. Ava swallowed hard. If she were married, she knew what she would find on her right hand. The wedding band was exactly where she feared it would be.

With shaking fingers, Ava removed the engagement ring and examined it closely.

"It was my mother's" Thranduil offered. It was a beautiful ring, Ava had to concede. In the finest elven craftmanship, the central diamond was encircled by a many smaller diamonds. The circle, she knew, was a symbol of eternal love – no beginnings and no endings. Had she really fallen in love with the elf that stood before her?

"I don't know anything about you" Ava said uncertainly.

"The first thing you should know if that I love you. No matter what Ava" Thranduil answered steadily.

Ava furrowed her eyebrows. The conversation was overwhelming. "I'd like to be alone. Please leave."

Her husband swallowed hard, gave a curt nod and left the room. As the door closed, Ava threw herself back into bed. Burying her face in the pillows, she screamed in frustration. She just wanted her old life back. Meanwhile, on the other side of the door, Thranduil took a shaky breath. He could scarcely believe it. Arwen had warned him about the amnesia, yet he foolishly thought if he could just speak to Ava, she would remember. How was he going to explain this to Legolas? How could he tell the elfling that his mother did not know who he was?

"Have faith Thranduil, she will find her way back to you" Arwen said softly. She had been waiting outside the room this whole time.

"She wanted nothing to do with me, it was quite clear she doesn't want to be here" Thranduil sighed.

"This is where she belongs" Arwen said simply.

Before the King could answer, an elfling's footsteps scampered across the stone floors. "Ada, aunt Calendil said nana was awake. Can I see her?" The Prince was trailed by Lady Calendil, who was breathless from chasing after him. He had clearly not heeded his minder's instructions to wait.

Thranduil shut away his personal anguish. His son needed him. Forcing a smile on his face, he knelt in front of Legolas. "Nana's still quite weak and not ready to have visitors yet. Let's let her rest so she can get better soon."

The father pulled his son into a warm embrace upon seeing the child's crestfallen face. "I miss nana. Can I see her for a little while, please!" Legolas protested.

Though Thranduil hated to disappoint him, he knew he was protecting Legolas. Thankfully, Arwen stepped in. "Legolas, sweetheart, why don't we go to the kitchens and find a snack? I think Nana would be alright with you having some chocolate cake right about now."

Thranduil breathed a cautious sigh of relief as Arwen carried the elfling towards the kitchens. He knew she would put Legolas to bed afterwards. Warm milk and cake always settled the child.

In the following days, the bittersweet news that the Queen had regained consciousness but recalled nothing of her life in Mirkwood became common knowledge in the realm. Thranduil had had to make it public, it would have only been a matter of time before the reality was self evident. Ava was insistent that she did not want to have anything to do with her life in Mirkwood. The courtiers and palace staff all agreed the prince needed to be protected, making sure Legolas was unaware of the family crisis.

"Ada, I don't understand why I can't come home with you!" Ava demanded.

Elrond braced himself. This was going to be one of the most difficult things he would ever do, but he knew it was for her own good and the good of her family. "Your home is here Ava, with your husband and son."

Ava rolled her eyes. "I don't want a husband and son!" Ava nearly shouted. She was so tired of people trying to tell her about a life she wanted nothing to do with.

"They're there whether you like it or not. And they have done nothing to deserve their family being ripped apart."
"So this is my fault? I'm supposed to pretend to live a life I don't want" Ava asked incredulously.

"No, you're supposed to discover why you love this life Ava. Because you surely did" Elrond replied.

"Don't leave me here alone, please Ada" Ava begged.

"I leave you in the most loving hands" Elrond reassured his daughter. He was doing what was best, he told himself, as he pulled Ava into a tight hug.

Ava stoically watched the Rivendell party depart Mirkwood, homebound. She stood at the palace gates until she could no longer see them, before reluctantly turning around to head back inside. She was surprised to see Thranduil still standing behind her. She had thought all the elves who had come to see the visitors off had left. He had stayed to make sure she was alright.

"Ava, I thought we could dine privately tonight" Thranduil suggested.

"If you insist" Ava responded coldly, pushing past the King.

Ava trudged into the royal family's private dining room that evening, in a foul mood. She felt it so unfair that she had been dumped in Mirkwood, in a life she did not recall choosing, a life she definitely did not want right now.

Thranduil, who was already seated at the table, stood when she entered the room. The dining table had been set up intimately, to allow the husband and wife time to talk privately. Ava cautiously took her seat. A serving maid poured wine and served the meal before being dismissed by the King.

"I had the chef prepare your favorite. I hope it will make you feel more at home" Thranduil said hopefully, gesturing towards the mushroom soup being served.

Ava raised her eyebrows. She was mildly surprised that Thranduil did indeed know what her favorite soup was. She sipped the soup slowly, remaining silent.
Thranduil did not bother with small-talk, his wife never saw the need for it. "Legolas misses you tremendously, he asks everyday to see you."

"Who's Legolas?" was the reply.

"Our son" Thranduil answered.

"Oh, right." Arwen and her father had already mentioned she had a child with Thranduil. She had not reacted well to that news. A small part of her still refused to believe it. "I – just – it's hard for me to believe I have a child. I don't want children right now, at all" she stated.

Thranduil sighed wearily. It had been a pattern, Ava refusing to believe things were a part of her life when told about them. "I was there the night you birthed him. The best time of my life. I assure you, he's our son. He's so young, he doesn't understand why he can't see his mother. I'm begging you to go to him."

Ava threw her napkin down in frustration. "I don't know how to be a mother! I can't be the nana he remembers."

"All he wants is your love, Ava. Please. I cannot keep telling him that you're ill. Elflings need their mothers. Legolas has done nothing to deserve losing his mother like this" the King made his case.

Ava very grudgingly granted his argument. Taking a large gulp of her wine, she nodded her head in agreement. "I will ask his chambermaid what the best time to see him will be" she said curtly.

Thranduil smiled in gratitude. "You were in labor with him for 18 hours. When he was finally born, I was so relieved you were well and he was too. The love I felt for him, it was instantaneous – from the moment I first held him, I knew my love for him was unending. You will feel it too, I'm sure."

"Right" came the cautious reply.

Reviews would be greatly appreciated! I will be sending you grateful thoughts!

- Edith