Hi everyone! I do apologise for the long wait! But I've finally got this chapter up and ready to go! Thank you for still reading my story and for all the support xxx

Chapter 7

The line has truly been crossed with Katherine Kavanagh, I can see it, sense it, and it damn hurts. I blink once then twice and the image of her fades and I panic, as the vision right in front of me unfolds into my living hell.

He grabs my arm.

Ouch!

''You little whore! Why didn't you bring any money?'' He spits.

''I... s-s-sorry,'' I stutter. Let go off my arm! It hurts! His nails are sharp like claws and they are digging into me.

''You're sorry...'' he laughs, ''You're sorry! Well I'm sorry, but that does not cover it, you promised!''

I close my eyes, ''But.. I could...not,'' he grabs hold of my other arm, just as tightly, and lifts me off of the ground without even trying.

''You are going to pay for it!'' he throws me and I hit the wall, crying out in pain, feeling as if I am going to throw up.

''Wha.. you...'' I swallow, ''want from me?,'' I turn my head the best I can so I can see him.

He stops.

He smiles.

He slowly starts walking over and crouches down next to me.

''You are meant to be of some use...'' he says calmly, ''you are my daughter after all...''

Anger, is what I feel and disgust. ''I never was and I never will be...''

He frowns and looks murderous, ''You'll regret that,'' I try to move away but he grabs me again and throws me one more time so my head hits the corner of the wall. The impact is so great I begin to feel dizzy and the whole room spins. I feel blood inside my mouth. The picture on the wall, of my mother, falls off and crack right in front of me...

''Go away!'' I scream.

''Go away! Go away! Go away!''

''Ana!'' I hear a mumble of my name. Who is that?

''Go away!''

''Ana.. you're safe... you're okay...'' the voice is still a soft whisper.

I open my eyes and he disappears.

I sniff and take a step back as I see what I always feared to see. Kate is giving me a look of sympathy along with her pain. The pain that I know she feels because of me. She heard it, loud and clear, for the first time. I always managed to hide my horror from her but not today, and now she doesn't even know what to say. She's scared of me, which is the one thing that I was hoping she will never feel towards me. I crossed that line big time and all I do is stare at my distraught best friend. But I don't feel anything which is even more terrifying to me, as I know I should do something, but I don't and instead I blink blankly up at her. The tears began to flow a while ago but there is nothing for me to feel, I feel empty.

''Ana... what was that?'' she attempts a step forward but I throw my hands up as a defensive gesture and flinch away. She noticed and I don't miss the shadow of guilt and hurt passing through her still beautiful green eyes. ''I can help you, let me help you,'' she tries to sooth me as if I was a broken child.

''No.'' I mumble softly and turn away from her. I can't do this, I just can't. I stride towards my room without even looking back at her, I know it's cruel to shut her out like this, but this is too much. I cannot stay any god damn minute longer in this house. The door to my room is practically kicked down and almost falls off the hinges when I open it. Yeah take it out on the door, as if that's going to help you. I ignore the voice inside my head as well as my emotions. I have one aim right now and that is to pack my bags and leave, so as soon as I am in my room, I reach underneath my bed and take out my red travel bag. If I don't leave now I'll never leave.

''Ana... what the hell are you doing?'' she comes rushing into my room, ''You are not leaving! I'm not letting you! Not in this state!''

I ignore her and face my wardrobe, I take couple of pairs of jeans, some cotton plain tops, jumpers, and also take some underwear. My moves are clumsy and disorientated as the blur images of him return back into my head. I hold my bed for some support before I lose my balance all together. Just a little longer Ana.

''Do you really think this is going to solve anything?'' I hear her tap her foot on the wooden tiles, her way of telling me to look at her, but I didn't. I cringed, my shoulders creeping towards my ears. I was embarrassed better more horrified at what she just saw, I fell apart, I just lost it. There was a long pause, the silence chilled the air between us and neither of us said a word. I knew she was the one waiting for me to explain myself.

Taking a deep breath, I tried to relaxed my mind but the tension became so intense it created a wall, that I just couldn't get past. I was destroying us, our friendship, but I needed time. I felt goose bumps appearing on my arms as I heard the floor creak and I jumped. The vision I saw happened so fast and quickly I couldn't get it out of my head not even for, Kate.

Oh Kate, I tried to picture her right now. Standing behind me with her tear stained face waiting for me. The image broke my heart into even more pieces then it already was. I sniffed but still managed to wipe my damp cheeks and carry on stuffing things in my bag. The decision was final.

''I see... you've... decided'' She hiccups through words and I squeezed my eyes shut, hating myself further. I knew she was testing me, she was waiting for a sign, anything, just like she always does. I gave her the answer the one I knew I could handle. I heard her walk away and that hurt but I decided to do this and in this time and place I knew it was the right thing to do, at least I hoped so.

I shut my travel bag and put it over my shoulder.

I stood in the threshold of my room and admired it. The corners of my lips started to lift as I remembered how me and Kate were decorating it and how she was fusing for over an hour about my crystal chandelier and whether it was in the centre or not. I smiled further remembering how funny that moment was. Everything in here was perfect, my pale blue walls, my simple single bed and of course my fluffy white carpet next to my bed that I enjoyed the feel off under my feet, especially in the mornings. My paintings on the walls were put up to make the whole place more... me I guess. I always looked at them, the ocean one was my favourite one I painted. I could already picture myself there, the sand beneath my feet would relax me, the ocean breeze would mess up my hair but I wouldn't care at least I would be far away. The other two painting were of my friends, Kate, Jose, Sam, and Liz. Every painting showed smiles and anyone who would be looking at those paintings would think I have an easy going life since I am surrounded by so much love and creativity, how wrong they would be. I looked away even though I didn't want to, it was always a habit for me to get lost in my own thoughts whenever I looked at my paintings. I knew I was on the verge of crying, but I pushed that urge way down like always and pursed my lips together. This room was meant to be a new beginning for me but it only seems to be a new beginning to another horror story.

I didn't bother taking anything else from my room even though I had so many things there that I wanted to take. But somewhere deep inside there was a slight spark that I may return. I went down the corridor in a complete daze which is why I probably couldn't recall how I got myself into my car. The one thing that I did remember is Kate in our kitchen that I went passed and with just one glance I knew she was distraught. My heart was hammering in my chest so hard I could have sworn I could hear it getting louder and louder by the second. I closed my eyes for second before I started the engine of the Audi and once I reopened them I knew where I needed to be at this exact moment. I needed Jose. I put my car into reverse and turned the wheel to get out of the drive.

''Call Jose'' I commanded to my car.

''Calling...Jose'' it replied.

Its starting to ring and I said a quick prey hoping that he was going to pick up and just when I was about to end the call I heard his sleepy and definitely disorientated voice that put a smile on my face. ''Ana?''

''Hey, Jose, first off I'm sorry I am calling so late,'' my gaze drifted to the digital clock and I was shocked to see it said two in the morning. Where has the time gone?

I heard movement and more shuffling before he spoke again, ''No problem, Ana, you know I'm always here when you need me. What's up?''

Oh god where to begin, I starting tapping on the steering wheel. Its started to become a nervous habit that I was beginning to hate.

''I'm coming to yours,''

''Wow.. ermm now?'' his voice sounded more controlled and steady then before. Maybe I shouldn't have dropped a massive bomb like that on him especially at this time in the night. Mentally I crossed my fingers begging that he would say yes.

''Yes I'm not too far off,''

''I'm obviously not going to say no to such a sexy woman like you,'' he purred.

I laughed,''Easy there tiger you need to buy me dinner first.''

I could feel him grinning, ''No problem there sweetheart,'' there was a slight pause and a shuffle again,''Let me tell the front desk you coming... and Ana?''

I stopped at the red light, ''Yes?''

''You have a hell of a lot of explaining to do as soon as your arse crosses that threshold.''

''Don't worry you'll get it,'' I bit my lip ''See you in a bit.''

I arrived at 10th Avenue street only ten minutes after our call. I was right when I said I wasn't far off. This area of Seattle always made me wonder why Kate didn't want to move here instead as it was simply a beautiful place to live. But instead we chose Escala but then again her dad is very hard on security and insisted that Escala has the highest level of security then any other building in Seattle so Kate didn't exactly have a choice as arguing with him wouldn't have made any difference. I sighed and finally got out of the car and locked it.

Once the receptionist at the front desk let me through I was on my way up to the 10th floor of this extraordinary building. The porcelain tiles ran in the main lobby and even in the lift by the looks of it. This building did remind me a lot of Escala ever since my foot stepped into Jose's building. The plants were placed perfectly at each corner of the building and one was even in the lift but in an exclusive place like this things get looked after. There was not even a speck of dust anywhere in sight. The whole place was well lit and whenever I looked up I had to shield my eyes from the bright lights positioned in a perfect line that ran down the centre of the vast lobby and also in the lift. The ride up was quick and as soon as the soothing voice in the lift spoke and said that the doors are opening I started my way to Jose's apartment.

''Honey I'm home,'' I blurred out, and moment later I was met with Jose. He changed his hair that's for sure, his once dark nearly shoulder length hair was now cut short and messy looking on top of his head. It was a definite sign that he not long got out of bed. His hazel eyes were smiling which was always something I loved about him and something I wasn't aware I missed until now. He was grinning at me showing his pearly white teeth that I knew from Kate were whitened not so long ago and I was truly impressed by the result.

My gaze fell on his naked chest and it was then that I noticed that he only wore his jeans that I assumed he quickly pulled on before he came to greet me. He was well built and lean but there was defiantly some more definition in his stomach muscles since the last time I saw him on our holiday. I wasn't going to lie to myself he looked delicious especially for someone who only recently woke up.

''Well hello there,'' his eyes travelled down my body and I became self concious as I knew I must have looked like a disaster next to him, which was confirmed when he frowned at me. ''Ana, what's wrong?'' his cheekiness was gone.

''Everything Jose,'' I dropped my head down too ashamed to even look at him.

''Oh sweetheart,'' within seconds I felt his warm chest again me and felt his even heart beat. I closed my eyes briefly as I inhaled his sweet scent. He smelled so fresh and minty and I concluded he had a shower. When he pulled back I knew I had to start my explaining.

''You got some red wine?''

His eyes widened, ''That bad huh?'' Jose knew that I only drank red wine whenever I was in my severely depressed stage or whenever a guy has fucked me over. Right now it felt like both, even though there wasn't any relationship involved but Christian, he was the the problem, and he was the first thing in the first wagon on the train of misery that I knew I was on.

I nodded

''Sure I have a stash, follow me.''

I smiled and did as he asked. I looked around the living space and was impressed by the amount of pictures that were on each wall. If someone other than Jose was to do this it would look cluttered but he made it look artist and modern. Every photograph he took told a story and whenever I looked at his work I was truly inspired. There were so many landscapes of sunsets, beaches, and simply forests and buildings. But there were also photographs of women along with men, and most had minimal clothing on. It still suited the scene he created in his house and I was glad I saw more worked getting added to his collection.

I made myself at home and sat down on his cream leather sofa and I felt the coldness of it even though I knew I was already cold myself. I placed my bag and my phone on the coffee table right in front of the TV. I grabbed the remote to the music station that I knew he always placed his phone into and switched it on. In an instant Moonlight Sonata by Ludwig Van Beethoven filled the brief silence and I managed a smile. I loved a bit of classical music whenever I needed some relaxation and Jose played this song a lot which suited me just fine in this very moment.

''Moonlight Sonata it is then?'' I turned my head and smiled again.''It truly is a beautiful piece of music,'' he passed me my glass of deep red wine and took a seat next to me. I swirled the glass in my hand and watched the wine spill around the glass like waves. I found it fascinating.

''Are you going to make me squeeze this out of you or are you going to tell me?''

I looked away and took a sip, loving the harsh taste of the strong wine making its way down into my mouth. ''It's a long story, Jose, and I'll try my best to tell you, I have to tell somebody or I'll go crazy.''

''I have all the time in the world, baby girl,''

I looked at him then and took strength from the reassuring smile he was offering me. ''I had a huge fight with Kate, like a really huge one.''

''You guys always make up,''

I shook my head, ''You didn't see the look she was giving me... and what she said... oh god Jose I really screwed up this time.'' I felt tears swimming in my eyes but I didn't want to cry, not then.''She was talking about the visions and the nightmares I have...''

''She knows?'' he didn't try to hide the surprise in his voice.

I swallowed ''I had one in front of her and she suspected it before I think and let's face it was I really going to hide this from Kate?,''

He let out a chuckle which calmed me down a bit, ''No you wouldn't not with Kate, but why was is such a big fight?,''

''Because I refused to tell her about them and then I packed up and left...''

He frowned ''You packed up?'' which is then when he saw my travel back on his coffee table, ''Oh, that's what you mean,''

I felt horrible as I knew I shouldn't just trample all over Jose apartment but I wanted to be with him.

''I'm sorry, Jose,'' my lips quivered.

He put a hand on my thigh and I gasped, ''Don't you dare apologise for this, sweetheart.'' my gaze met his, ''You needed to talk to someone as you said yourself and I quote 'I'll go crazy,''

I took another sip, but this time a longer one, ''You know how Kate is, she won't drop it until I'll tell her and she already thinks I'm loosing it so she will be even more persistent.''

He dropped his hand and I went cold all over again, ''Maybe you should tell her,''

''No,''

''But as you said yourself she will not drop it and if you want to be friends with her you are going to have to tell her,''

I stood up and placed my empty glass on the table, ''You know I can't,''

I started to walk to the island in the middle of the kitchen and Jose followed, ''Kate's been your best friend for years and its obvious she wants to help you,''

I stopped and placed my palms flat on the granite workshop on the island, ''But she can't help me,'' I raised my voice.

Jose placed his hand at the small of my back, ''You know I'm right and you should tell her,''

''I know but I don't want to stir the pot even more, you are the only person that knows about my nightmares,''

''Why did you tell me?''

I took a step back and his arm fell to his side, ''Because...because...I...'' I didn't know what to say or maybe I did but I didn't know how to put it all into words so instead I said. ''Because its simple with you,''

''Why?''

''Stop asking so many questions?'' I grinned,

He grinned back ''Isn't this what you wanted?''

I elbowed him in the side, ''You're just being nosy,''

''That hurt,''

I rolled my eyes ''Don't be such a baby,''

''You want some food?''

I had to laugh than, Jose's answer to problems was always food, ''Sure what have you got?''

''I have pizza, pizza and...pizza,''

I followed him to the freezer and took out the pepperoni pizza, ''I'll take the pizza,''

''Great choice,''

After we put the pizza on we sat back down on the sofa and watched Jose's favourite collection of James Bond films. He was so obsessed I sometimes thought he was his own version of James Bond. It felt so good sitting here with him and finally allowing my brain to recharge from all the drama that has been happening in my life recently. He was such a funny guy to be around and he always put me in a better state of mind. I looked up at him from beneath my lashes and smiled as I saw how concentrated he was at the TV, he put his whole mind to it just like he does with everything else in his life and I truly admired that. He ran his index finger along his lips as he leaned forward and frowned. Curious I looked at the TV and watched as Bond jumped on the train and started firing bullets. I didn't get his fascination with Bond but I watched each and every film with him a dozen of time and even though he watched them back to front so many time before you wouldn't be able to move him from this seat before the film finished.

Time flew by and when the film finished I finally managed to stretch.

''I managed to land myself a new contract,'' Jose said out of the blue.

I jumped up and hugged him out of excitement, ''Oh my god, that's amazing,''

He hugged me back and chuckled, ''We should celebrate,'' I sang in his ear,

''Easy there tiger, you need to buy me dinner first,'' I punched him in the shoulder.

''Shut up, you horny beast, I wasn't talking about sex,''

''But you wish you were,''

I gasped and laughed again, ''What's gone into you Jose? Has your sex life gone from existent to non existent lately?'' I teased.

''Maybe we should talk about your sex life for a change?'' he teased back,

I started my way to the guest bedroom, ''My sex life is fine thank you very much but-''

''But what?'' he shouted after me.

Crap

''What have I missed?''

Double crap

''Nothing!'' I burst out

''You are so not getting away with that,'' I ran towards the quest bedroom by passing his room and the studio but he ran too.

I started to laugh again, ''You have to catch me first,''

''Oh you are so on,''

I looked back and he was right behind me, I squealed.

Nearly there

I reached the door knob to the room and just as I was about to turn it I got pushed against the door instead. His strong arms were on either side of me, caging me. My breath was rapid and I was surprised my legs didn't give in after the exhausting day and evening I've had.

''So, Ana, now that I've caught you. You have to spill.'' He breathed down my neck. ''I know there's more.''

I ducked under his arm and crossed my arms over my chest, ''Fine, rules are rules,'' He smiled. ''I've met a guy,''

Jose raised his eyebrows ''Well this is interesting,'' He leaned against the door, ''Spill more, Steele.''

''He... he makes me feel different.'' I feel myself blush.

He ran his fingers through his hair, ''You want him and you got it bad''

I attempted to punch him but his big hand caught my fist. ''Shut up.'' I blush harder. God damn it!

''You have it so bad, Steele,'' he carried on teasing me.

I narrowed my eyes, ''Shut up,'' I went for another punch but he caught that hand too.

''So tell me who is the lucky guy?''

''And why would I tell you?'' I pushed back from him.

''As you know you can be yourself around me and therefore tell me anything you want as you know I will never judge you,''

He had a point even when I hated to admit it to myself. His hazel eyes were laughing as he knew I couldn't say no to that. I could be a total bitch to him or I could even murder someone and he would never judge me which is why I always acted myself around him and even allowed some of my crazy side out. ''Maybe next time,''

He shook his head and offered me a smile that showed his cute dimple on his right cheek. It made him look younger and cuter. ''We could have played some role play and I could have been your Mr Perfect for the night,'' he winked at me.

I blushed but laughed at his cheekiness again. He remembers as well as I do that night. There is still a slight fog there but I still remember my 21st birthday and what happened between me and my friend Jose. I remember the drinking, the dancing and all the laughter. I was having a good time and I was laughing every single part of it. I was too drunk that night to be trusted to make my own way home so Jose offered to take me as Kate was already occupied with her boyfriend at the time.


''Jose!'' I giggled.

''Ana, come this way and be quieter you'll wake up the whole neighbourhood.'' He laughed at my ridiculous behaviour.

''But why can't we be loud I love being loud!''

He laughed a proper belly laugh, ''We're nearly there!''

We got home and he offered to stay till Kate got back but he ended up falling asleep. The next morning a huge headache hit me like a tsunami. I remember waking Jose up and asking for an orange juice and the morning flew by. We were talking for hours and things changed between us in that moment.

''Jose, please,''

''You sure you want to do this?'' He looked me right in the eyes as he lowered his face to my lips.

''Yes,'' I nodded.

He kissed me.

He touched me.


I twirled a piece of my hair in my fingers. That was the only night that we ever had sex. I'm not going to say that it was a mistake because it wasn't as I knew I wanted it. We agreed after that this will never be said to anyone so we kept it a secret and became the best of friends after. I didn't want to go there not now anyway.

''Earth to Ana,''

''Sorry, I'm just really tired,''

''No wonder you haven't slept at all,''

''I should go, goodnight,'' I offered a smile.

''Wait,'' he grabbed hold of my left arm. ''Will you come to a meeting with me tomorrow? Errm... I mean today... later today?''

I giggled, ''Of course,''

''Promise?''

''I promise,''

''Thank you,''

''Who is this meeting with anyway?'' I turned the door knob and went inside the guest room to prepare the bed for myself. I started to take off the majority of the pillows off of the bed.

''Christian Grey, this rich guy I'm sure you've heard of him and he wants to buy my photographs,'' I paused, if only he knew how well I actually knew Christian Grey or maybe how well he actually knew me. The mention of his name alone, made me shiver and my heart skipped a beat. How can I go with Jose to this meeting? I can't!

''What's wrong, Ana? You gone really flushed,''

''Its nothing but I just got... stuff to do later so I can't go,'' I turn my back to him so he doesn't see my face.

''You promised and anyway you're lying,'' I hear amusement in his voice.

I walk to the bathroom to turn the shower on. ''But-''

He cuts me off ''No buts you coming with me, see you in a couple of hours. Get some sleep, Ana,'' He walks towards me and kisses me on the forehead and give me one last hug before he leaves.

After my long shower I sit on the edge of the bed with a towel wrapped round me and grab hold of the soft duvet so hard that my knuckles turn white. I felt tingly all over and my legs refused to move. I was only a few hours away from seeing Christian and I was going to dread every single second of it. I just knew it.


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