Chapter 13: Lost and Found

October 2009

New York

We went back home the day after the party, we made it just in time for breakfast. It's funny how vastly different yesterday and today are. Ball gowns and dancing has changed into homework and study. Last night almost didn't feel real, more like a dream. A very strange dream.

The twinkling lights of the ballroom, everyone in gowns and suits. Music for hours and hours. It had felt so strange to be there. Out of place. Like a fish out of water.

I felt suffocated, drowning in a sea of shimmering fabrics, stiff posture, and laughter. The corset made it worse. The whole night is a haze now. A blur of color and noise. Everything felt too chaotic. There were many times throughout the night I just wanted to leave. To disappear.

Meeting Jason made the night a little easier. More bearable in a way. Yet it came with a different kind of pressure. And awkwardness. I could still feel the eyes of everyone from the ballroom on me. It's probably burned into my mind for the rest of my life.

"What happened after that?" Percy asked as we did the dishes from breakfast, it's his wash led while I dried.

"Nothing, he just dropped me back off at my balcony and he flew off to his room. And that was that," I said, taking another wet plate from him.

"So he didn't try to do anything, like kiss you." His eyebrows furrowed deeply as he scrubbed the bowl. A little too hard if you asked me.

My mind automatically goes to that cringe-worthy goodbye when finally landed back onto my balcony. We had stood for a minute for sure what to do next. The only handshake felt too cold by then. Yet a hug felt too intimate when we had just met that night. In the end, we settle with a fist bump. And there may have been a small kiss on my cheek. But Percy didn't need to know that.

"We just met that night. No, he didn't try to kiss me," I told him in a low voice, I looked over my shoulder to see Mom fully focus on the tv. I swallowed heavily as I tried to keep my face the same indifferent expression as before.

We were quiet for a bit as we finish the dishes, cleaning the rest of the kitchen quickly. Afterward, we got ready to go out, replacing my pajama pants for jeans, and keeping on my tank top on. Gathering my books from my desk and shoved them into my backpack.

"Mom, we're going to the library to do homework and study for a bit," I called out to Mom as I came out of my room, pulling on my NYPD sweatshirt.

Both were still in their pajamas, each had a cup of tea in their hands. I maneuvered over to the sofa chair to put on my shoes. Once I've tied the laces, I gather the rest of my things from the kitchen. But even as I move around the apartment, last night circulated in my mind, especially my time with Jason. His eyes, the way they shined when he laughed. The way he held me close to his body. Did he want to kiss me? You know, more than a kiss on a cheek.

Did I want him to kiss me?

"Okay, honey. Be careful, are you guys still going to the movie theater after?" She muted the news and twisted her body to face me from the couch as I grabbed some snacks and putting them in my backpack.

"Maybe, depends on if we finish everything in time. We're planning on going around eight-thirty after we get something to eat," I responded, walking back towards her and leaning forward on the couch. The floor squeaks underneath my shoes.

"Okay, what time will you be home? Not too late, I hope," Her eyes narrowed as I twist my lips in and grinned back.

"Ten, ten-thirty at the latest. For sure we'll be back by eleven." I told her with a smile and kiss on the cheek. "Percy! Hurry up, you're worse than me!"

My mom scowled and clicked her tongue at my words. I shrugged my shoulders and play innocent. I'm right and she knows it. It's always something with him. Whether it be he couldn't find a clean shirt or the other shoe. With that messy room, anything is possible. I wonder what's today is going to be like. My money is on that he couldn't find clean underwear.

"I'm coming! I couldn't find my other shoe," He said as he hopped out, trying to put on the left shoe. He tied it quickly and kissed Mom goodbye on the cheek.

"If you clean your room, you wouldn't have this problem, sweetie," She told him, tidying his hair a bit.

"I'll clean it tomorrow after school, I promise," He replied as we exit the apartment, I laughed at him as, closing the door behind us. That what he always says and he never does it. He'll just throw everything off to the side.

"You are such a liar! You know you won't do it!"

I laughed harder when he shot me a look that said to shut up.


"So where are we going?" I asked Edward when I'm in front of him.

Other students stared as they passed by us, whispers floated around us. This wasn't probably the best place to meet.

"It's a surprise," he said with a smirk. "You will need to drop off your car at your house."

"Okay but in that case, you'll need to wait for a bit. I need to take care of the pegasi before we leave," I said as we walked down the stairs to the parking and paused in front of his car. His siblings nowhere in sight. "What about your siblings? Are you just leaving them here?"

"No, Emmett drove his Jeep today," He pointed to the shiny black Jeep next to his car with a grin. My heart skipped, so suddenly that my entire body jumped. Confusion flooded my thoughts, turning my head into chaos.

"Oh, okay. See you at my place." I muttered distractedly before trudging over to my car.

It's only a grin. A small, insignificant grin. Nothing more. There should be a reason for me to have reacted like that. But it is a nice smile, a little crooked. A small imperfection that broke through the façade of that cold predator exterior.

What am I doing? Hastily, I shook my head and proceeded to exit the parking lot with Edward right behind me the entire drive to my house. Always remained directly behind me, I bet he was grinning the entire drive. I pulled up to my garage while Edward parked in the driveway, seating patiently behind the steering wheel. Pondering for a second, I headed over to his car and tapped on her window.

"Do want to come in? It won't take long, but I'll feel bad leaving here in your car," I told him once the window was down.

He nodded after some hesitation and followed me into the backyard. I went straight into the barn while he stood by the entrance. Like I had said, it doesn't take long to put the food and water. There wasn't much to it. But I purposely took my time when it came to bushing them. The sound of the brush moving through their hair soothes my nerves, so calming and alluring to my ears. The soft raindrops on the roof along with their calming chewing created a relaxing atmosphere. I almost don't want to leave and just stare here. Maybe take them for a spin, let them stretch their legs and wings.

When Stella turned her head to rubbed against mine, it broke me out of my daze. I gave her a soft smile and informed her that I would leave the door open so they could go outside if they wanted to. And with one last peck to them all, I walked back out to Edward. The nervousness that had vanished inside the barn returned and intensified with each step I took.

"Do you minding waiting a bit more? I need to…um… use the bathroom," I said, feeling a bit awkward. But I wasn't sure why. Everything feels strange when I'm around him. Yet sometimes, it doesn't feel as strange. There wasn't a particular right way to say it, but it somehow felt comfortable. Relaxed, even.

"Of course, I'll wait right here. Take your time," He smiled gently, putting his hands inside the pockets of his jacket. With shallowed breath, I turned and walked hurriedly upstairs.

As I washed my hands, my eyes locked on my engagement ring, the pearl shiny beautifully. Snatching it from the ring holder, I slid it on without a second thought. The cold metal grazing down my finger as it traveled down my finger. Until it was nestled at the end of my finger.

Jason filtered into my mind, his smile, eyes, and lips. My eyelids shut slowly as I remembered our days in Paris. Away from everyone and our responsibilities. Everything felt easier then. Days filled with exploring the city and countryside, talking about our goals for our camp. And as I opened my eyes once again and saw my reflection, with a newfound determination in my eyes.

"Okay, I'm ready," I announced, bouncing down the stairs.

He was standing next to the piano, placed to the wall of glass that faced the backyard. The natural light cascaded around him. "I didn't know you played."

My legs carried me to him, but I force myself to keep some distance. My fingers lightly touched the keys.

"I don't," I told him in a low voice. I pressed down a key that created a single note that vibrated. "But I'm learning."

If he noticed my ring, he doesn't mention say anything. He gave me a nod and with one hand, softly played a few more keys into a soft tune. I watched in a trance as fingers played each key perfectly. And as the last noted faded, he slowly lifted his hand away.

I inhaled deeply and headed towards the door. Edward beat me to it and opened the door for me. I tried not to show any shock at his quick movement. As I walked past him, my thumb rubbed my ring. Part of me felt stupid for putting it on, but a large part thought it was necessary. A reminder.

I look at him in confusion as we pulled to his house.

"What are we doing at your house?" I asked him, fully confused as I stepped out of his car.

"It's just pit stop, easier to get there from here," He locked the car and head towards the woods.

"Oh, are we walking then?"

"Running. I can carry you on my back." He said with a small, wicked grin.

I arched my left eyebrow. "Um, no. I think I can keep up. Just point me in the right direction."

"Okay," His crooked smile triggered a flutter in my heart. "It should take about fifteen minutes to get there if we run fast."

"Then I think I'll be fine. Though I may need to take a nap though," I warned him as I gathered my hair into a ponytail.

He smirked and let out a small chuckle as he pointed in a particular direction, past the river. Throwing him one last glance, I broke out into full speed, not even bothering to jump over the river. It hardened enough for me to step over it, water splashes out with each step. I kept running, ducking and dodging lower branches, leaping over high roots leaving Edward in the dust. The cold wind slammed my face as I pushed forward. It's not even ten minutes into my route that burst into a small circular meadow. I come to a sudden halt as I admired the small piece of Elysium on Earth. Lush green grass with some flowers scattered around, trees surround the meadow in a perfect circle. Realizing that Edward has not yet arrived, I caught my breath while I wait. It took about another five minutes for Edward to finally burst into the meadow.

His eyes are open wide in amazement, completely bewildered that I was here before him. He stopped in front of me, his hair is slighting dismay from the wind, gawking at me.

"How fast can you run?" His voice barely above a whisper, I could even see a bit of fear in his eyes.

"I don't know," I shrugged, "We've never timed ourselves before, too busy worrying or doing about other stuff. Why?"

"I'm the fastest in my family, tapped my speed around 180 miles per hour. And it only took you a fraction of the time it usually takes me to get here. I lost you the moment you ran off." Eyes were wide with curiosity and interest.

I shrugged, not seeing the big deal. I've seen far more interesting things in my life, and me running faster than a vampire wasn't one. Walking deeper into the beautiful meadow until I'm right at the center and plopped on the ground to lay down. Edwards came up to lay down next to me, with a good distance between us. He probably did notice the ring. The clouds floated high in the sky, rays of sunlight slipping through small cracks. Water moving through rocks could be heard close by.

I relished at the moment, inhaling profoundly the clean air. Soaking in as much fun as I can. Grinning, I turned to look at Edward, to thank him for bringing me. Had this been my spot, I would've kept it all to myself. Our eyes lock the moment I turned my head. His gold orbs met mine. His eyes held so much emotion it took my breath away, and I lost myself in his eyes as the rest of the world faded away. Until it was only me and him in this beautiful small meadow. Then a strong beam of sun hit us and his skin glimmered brightly into a thousand pieces of diamonds.

Holy Hades.


"So, you sparkle? Like a disco ball, you must have really popular in the seventies," I joked, gazing up to the blue sky. The white, fluffy clouds gently move as the wind ruffles the earth around us.

We both laid down on the moist grass, only a small space between us. Still close enough that feel his coldness. I should put more distance between us, but I stay where I am.

"That only happens in direct sunlight," He explained softly and I only hummed in return. "You eye color changes, why?"

"They're normally a sea-green, but they change to match the nearest body of water."

I wondered what color they were now? It was quiet once again as we just laid there. Clouds covered the rays that were directly hitting Edward. With each breath I took, I could just feel my body sinking deeper and deeper into the ground. My limbs loosened, but only by a faction. There was still a small movement on my foot and my index finger tapping my stomach. My mind was still racing and buzzing, waiting for the slightest sign of danger.

"I am correct to assume that speed is another benefit of the River Styx."

I inhaled deeply before answering. "You are correct."

My body shivered as it remembered the horrible and excruciating pain of River Styx. The way it felt as it burned my flesh, the sensation of swimming in acid. My heart began to rapidly beat inside as my breath grew hollow.

"There aren't enough words to describe how awful and incredibly painful it was," I whispered gravely, my voice slightly shaking. "It felt as if we were swimming in a river of acid, eating away our skin. It was so easy to just let go, to dissolve into dust."

He remained silent, listening I went into depth about my experience with the River Styx. The risk we were talking about when took we bathe in it, the warning Achilles gave us beforehand. What we had to survive and how dangerously close we were to let go.

I never once turned my eyes away from the sky, it was easier to talk to the sky than to his face. Yet his stare was all I could feel as I spoke.

"There are only four people to have survived the River Styx. And while the curse gives us strength, speed, agility, etc., it all comes with a price. We get tired easier and faster, and of course, the smallest injury to our "Achilles' heel" can kill us."

"Why do it in the first place? Why still go through it, even after Achilles gave that warning?" He questioned. "What did Kronos do that push you and your brother to do that?"

The second that name escaped from his mouth, fear enveloped my bones, as if his decaying hands were crushing my heart. My breathing began to grow shallow as the world began to go hazy. I could feel myself slipping into darkness, where he would be waiting for me. Luring in the shadows.

I will never escape him. Until the day I die, he will be there. I could act all tough and as if nothing is wrong during the day, but in my dreams, I'll be cowering in absolute fear. Like I am now. And all it took was just his name. I shakily rose to a sitting position, putting my head between my knees.

"Bella?" A voice faintly called out. "It's going to be okay. Bella, you need to breathe." It told me as a hand rubbed my back. "Just breathe. I'm here."

"Don't say his name," I mustered with my lips trembling. I was a sniffling mess with tears trailing down my cheeks. "Names have power."

He was quiet but his hands were loud.

It took another couple more breathing exercises to calm down. That when I realize how close Edward has gotten. Our legs practically touching. My whole body hummed as

"I am sorry," he whispered with remorse deeply embedded in his tone. "I did mean to cause-"

I shook my head. "How could you have known." I swallowed my nerves before speaking again. "It's all his fault." I wiped away my tears. "He…um…so remember Luke? And how he tricked Annabeth? And that story I told you during lunch?" He only nodded in response. "What I didn't tell you was that Luke was the stole Zeus' Lighting Bolt. He betrayed us, his friends, and Camp Half-Blood. Luke had been angry that Gods for neglecting their children, which I don't blame him. Things were bad when we got there." Memories of my first night in camp to mind, and how overcrowded Hermes' cabin was. "But Luke's hate was so strong that…Kronos saw him as the perfect opportunity. He slipped into Luke's dream and persuaded Luke to join his revenge.

"That summer set off a chain of events that… that in all sense, screwed us up," I huffed as crisscrossed my legs. And began to aimlessly pull the grass. "Luke tried to kill us after he told Percy what he had done. We're only twelve," I whispered gravely. And I swore I heard him gasp softly, so softly that I almost didn't hear him.

"So many things happened, too many if I'm being honest." I sighed as finally laid back down, palms touching the soft ground. Edward mirrored my movements, I could feel his hand was close to mine. "I can't tell you everything but to answer your earlier question…Kronos seize his moment and started a war against the gods. He needed a temporary body to regain his strength and Luke volunteer. But to host a titian, Luke needed to be stronger..."

"So he swam in the River Styx," Edward finished the sentences seriously.

"Yup," I answered, popping the p.

Edward didn't say anything. Instead, we just laid there, each lost inside our thoughts. Side by side, our hands only a few inches apart.

My fingers yearned to hold him; his hand was so close to mine. I couldn't seem to stop my fingers as they edge closer to his until our pinkies touched. My blood raced, my skin tingled, and my breathing accelerated just from a simple touch. Our fingers hook in together, my body hummed and tingled, and all the stars align perfectly. As if everything in the world just made perfect sense at our touch, no matter how small. I look down at my hands and when I see my ring glisten in the light, my heart filled with dread and regret. And the world came crashing down as memories of Jason filled my mind. I snatched my hand away sitting upward in a flash.

My heart raced with guilt, a heavyweight settle on my stomach. I think I'm going to be sink. Jason, I love Jason, I'm marrying Jason; I repeated those words over and over again in my head. I needed to see him. It was getting harder to be around Edward. This was a mistake, a horrible and stupid mistake.

"Bella?"

I stood up slowly and made my way to the edge where we came from. A strange humming rang in my ear and I'm positive my face is bright red. I'm struggling to compose myself. He numbly agreed, his face showed no expression but his eyes said it all. He stared for a little too long at my ring. My pearl ring, a constant reminder of my duty and choice to marry Jason.


Jasper and Alice were outside, sitting on the stairs that led up to the front door. Jasper gazed pensively at Edward for a moment before he turned his attention to me. I sent him a grin, but I'm sure it looked more like a grimace. He knows something or at least suspects.

"How do you feel?" Jasper's voice drew my attention away from Edward and Alice.

"Better, thank you for asking. And you?" I said with as much composure I could muster.

"So, you guys were gone for a while," Alice slyly commented, bouncing her eyebrows. "What were you up to?"

My face burned at her implication.

Edward glared at her so heatedly, with the sole intention to get her to shut up. But Alice seemed completely immune. She didn't say anything, but from her facial expression, she was thinking it. And by Gods, what was she thinking?

"I've been well. Preventing these two from fighting, as always." We chuckled, awkwardly, easing the tension between Edward and Alice.

"What were you guys doing outside anyway?" I questioned once Edward and Alice ease their silent battle.

"Nothing, we just wanted to get out of the house for a bit. It can get quite stuffy being there all the time. Besides school and hunting, there is not much we can do here," Alice shrugged a bit saddened.

There wasn't much to do in Forks, to begin with, most teenagers hang out in only a few places. Sully's was one of the major places where people hang out after school but they don't eat. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how much the Cullens were confined to their home. And while their home was the only place they can be themselves, it was also, in a way, their prison.

Trapped in a repetitive cycle of school, home, and hunt, isolated from the rest of the town. Unable to interact with others too much, or risk putting their identities at risk.

"Yeah, the cons of a small town," I added dejectedly. "But at least you're safe. That all that matters."

Safety never lasts forever. Better to safe than dead, I always say. Jasper nodded in agreement as his eyes shifted to Alice.

"I should go, it's getting late," I mumbled as began to walk away, while telepathy reaching out for Stella.

Edward easily caught up to me. "Let me give you a ride back."

I shook my head. "It's okay. My ride just got here."

He looked confused for a second, that's when we heard it. The sound of flapping wings as they got closer and closer. It was much longer before Stella landed a foot away. Her hair glowed in the rays of the setting sun. He nodded in realization and let out a small chuckle.

"That's convenient," Edward commented.

I laughed, thinking of all the times Stella had to save my ass.

"Oh, you have no idea." I joked as I effortlessly hopped on. Once I was comfortable, I called out to Jasper. "We still have to cash in that rain check."

Jasper laughed, draping his arm around Alice's shoulders. "Just let me know when and where. I'm always ready."

"How does Saturday sound? Noon. My place." I replied, smirking.

"Yes, Ma'am." He said in his southern accent with a head tilt, hand pretending to be holding a hat.

"Alright." I laughed, before turning Stella and flew away.

The view was immaculate, a swirl of yellow, orange, and pinks joined with fluffy white clouds. So I decided not to rush home. Stella gently swayed in the sky, while I rested my head on her neck. The soft breeze ruffled my hair, probably making a mess and getting all tangled. But at that moment, I could care less.

I silently thanked Apollo for taking his time to bring down the sun. When the sun had finally disappeared over the horizon and the moon has taken its place in the sky, the stars shined beautifully. I carefully turned onto my back, starring straight into the night sky. And there she was.

"Hi, Zoë," I mumbled once I found her. "I miss you."

A small part of me hoped that she would reply somehow. Give me a sign that she was listening. But of course, that didn't happen.

"Things have been crazy. And so confusing," I continued. "I recently got some bad news. And I'm not sure how to handle it. Or deal with it."

The Huntress just shined in the night sky.

"I haven't told anyone, not even Percy," I choked out. "And I think it's because that the second I tell him. It all feels real, and I don't want it to be."

I took a second to compose myself. Tears were already blurring my vision. I rubbed my face harshly and sat up. I sighed, looking up to the sky.

"I just really need some help, and I honestly have no clue what to do," I cried out to her. "Gods, I sound pathetic. I'm pretty sure that if you were here, you'll tell me to stand strong and proud. But I'm not sure how to do that right now. I'm so lost…and scared." I hiccupped.

And when I was once again met with silence, I simply told her good night and flew home. Stella rubbed her head against mine, blowing gently into my ear. I laughed weakly and rubbed her neck and bid her good night.

I walked sluggishly to the house from the barn, my feet slightly sinking to the soft ground. My eyes were focused on the ground, so I didn't realize he was there.

"Hey," he said.

Jason stood at the top of the stairs; hands tuck inside his hoodie. His grin was like the light at the end of a long and dark tunnel. Relief washed over me as the corners of my mouth instantly turned up. And the next thing I knew, I had wrapped my arms around his neck.

My heart fluttered when I felt his hands encircled my torso.

"I missed you…so much," I whispered into his neck. My hands fisted his hair. "I so happy you're here."

His arms tighten. "I've missed you."

A kiss was placed on my head. And I relished at the moment, fear slipped away as hope returned. While a small amount still lingered, there was now a small amber of optimism flickering inside me.

"Not that I'm happy you're here," I said, tilted only my head back to look at him. "but why are you here?"

"We had this whole talk on how we could hang out more. Because we're only a state away! And on the same coast!" He exclaimed as I laughed. "Yet, we have only seen each other in Olympus. On the other side of the country. That's insane!"

I laughed with him at the absurdity. Our laughter died down into a relaxed silence. His forehead resting against mine.

"So, here you are," I said breathlessly, my hand resting on his neck.

He grinned. "Here I am."

His lips capture mine in a soft kiss and that small flickering amber exploded into a passionate flame. Burning and raging inside me. Strong, rough hands were on my cheeks. A small tug on my bottom lip resulted in a breathless moan.

I hummed with a grinned, resting my forehead on his. We were quiet to catch our breaths.

"I'm really happy you're here," I whispered breathlessly. "Have you eaten?"

"No, I was waiting for you." He answered. "What do you want? Pizza? Chinese or Thai? Burgers? Tacos? Italian?"

"I would love Chinese but, the place here isn't that great." I shuddered, remembering when I had it a while back.

Jason raised an eyebrow. "When did I ever say that we're eating here?" I look at him, completely perplexed. "Hold on."

I let out a small shriek as we skyrocket into the night sky. Jason's laughter was barely heard over the wind. I buried my head into his chest; hands holding on for my dear life. Especially after what happened last time.

We flew for a while, but I wasn't sure for how long. It certainly wasn't more than an hour. He must have flow faster than usual, but when we finally landed, I sighed in extreme relief. That's when I noticed where we were. Right in front of the Seattle Great Wheel.

"Really?" I laughed.

The Seattle Great Wheel was lit, a bright and color contrast among the night view. Some people were walking about, none the wiser that the two teenagers just drop from the sky. Everyone just walking about their own business all thanks to the Mist.

"More food options," he simply said with a shrug. I chuckled at his nonchalant response.

Linking arms, we walked calming among the mortals. Passing by many seafood restaurants, in which I gagged. And Jason, as always, laughed in response. At this point, it had become more of a running joke between us.

And as we strolled around the city, in search of food, memories came flooding in. Of doing the very same thing in Paris, two kids looking for a place to eat. Not to demigods from enemy camps. It was the most normal I have ever felt.

Finding a Chinese restaurant didn't take long. My mouth watered as soon as we entered. The spices all swirled in the air, my stomach growled in anticipation. Just as I was about to find a table, Jason pulled me back.

"What's wrong?" My eyes instantly search for monsters.

He shook his head. "Let's get it to go."

Huh? What wrong with eating it here? Did we fly all over to Seattle, only to take our food back to Forks?

Jason chuckled when at my expression and peck my forehead. "Trust me."

And so, we ordered our food to go. Jason carried our food while I held on to our drinks. As we walked deeper into Seattle instead of flying back, I bombed him with questions. All went unanswered. Everything became clear when the Space Needle came into view.

"Are eating on top of the Space Needle?"

He nodded with a grin.

"Is that even legal?" And when he didn't say anything I exaggeratedly gasped in shock. "Oh, my gods. Is Jason Grace breaking a rule? Probably a law?"

Jason threw me a smirk. "He could be."

I swooned at that smirk. He knew what smirk did to me. "I am so turned on right now!"