Febuwhump Day 1 - Mind Control
"You believe me, right?"
The plea had been broken down by time, worn thin and chipped away as stones in a river that have a constant flow of water pouring over them. He was tired – tired beyond what words could express.
Inuyasha looked at him, stared at his face with undue scrutiny, and his amber eyes burnt like cinders in a fire put out. He looked tired too. "I don't know," he said.
Miroku laughed, hollow and broken, and reached out to weave strands of snow-white hair through his fingers. Inuyasha didn't pull away, didn't flinch. He was like rocks, but no water to erode them. Miroku wished he could feel.
He only got so far until the chain around his wrists stopped his movement.
"I didn't mean to, you know." And if tears wanted to escape his eyes, pour down his face then that'd be fine too but they had dried up days ago. Dried up with the guilt on his hands, washed off just the same. "I didn't mean to hurt them."
Inuyasha snatched his wrist, grip tight and painful but Miroku knew he deserved it. His voice was laced poison when next he spoke. "You didn't mean to, but you did."
"I did," he agreed. It had been easy, easier than anything he had ever done before. He knew Inuyasha would smell the blood from a mile away so he had used the blunt end of his staff. Shippo first, because he was quick and loud and could run away or scream for help. Then Kagome, eyes wide and scared and he had not hesitated at all.
With Sango he had. It had hurt and he had squeezed and his nails had dug into her throat. Relief had flooded Miroku like a wave when Inuyasha pulled him off her, almost killed him in anger alone.
He hadn't. None of them had. "Do you think they'll forgive me?" Miroku asked.
"Kagome already has," Inuyasha answered. Miroku couldn't tell if he was spiteful about that. He probably should be. "They all will once we clear this up."
And as if a page was turned, as if the bell was ringing, Miroku felt the grin grow like fractures across his face. "Clear what up?"
Inuyasha snarled, pulled at his skin and broke through and then blood was running down Miroku's arm and it blossomed with pain but it almost helped. Almost cleared up the fog in his mind, making it hard to think. "You know what the fuck I'm talking about!" Inuyasha was right in his face.
"I don't-" Miroku managed, sobs tearing through his chest but refusing to come out and he shook his head but that didn't make it any easier to look away, any easier to not hear the whispers. "I didn't do anything-"
They'll die, it told him. If they face me, they'll die.
Couldn't they see that all Miroku wanted was to keep them safe?
The hold around his wrist lessened, faded away, and then Inuyasha was pulling him closer, nuzzling the bleeding wound almost affectionately, almost apologetically. "I know you think that," he said. "I know you think this is real, but it's not. We'll solve this."
Miroku's chest hitched, his heart was burning. "Everyone keeps saying that this is all in my head, but I know it's not, I know it's real!"
Inuyasha didn't answer.
Closing his eyes, Miroku felt the energy leave him again. He was tired of fighting it. "What do we do?" he asks. "I'm... scared. I don't want to hurt you."
He couldn't remember the last time he admitted that to somebody, to anybody. Being scared. Maybe to his father, back when he was tiny and restless and could whisper secrets into the folds of his robe. When the world wasn't so intent on destroying him.
Inuyasha shifted, held him against himself instead of away, cradled something broken, and then he sighed.
"We'll solve this," he promised again. "I'll solve this or die trying."
And if nothing else, it could at least fill Miroku with comfort.
Tumblr: sharada-n
