AN: thank you all for the nice reviews, in this chapter you'll start to see Bella and Paul's different approach to love but it will be a turning point in their relationship as well. I hope you'll enjoy it.
5.
Bella must have fallen asleep because she was shaken awake by Paul. "Time to go, my shipa. We shouldn't make them wait for us."
Bella smiled at him, and stood up. "Sure, sure. I was thinking that tomorrow night we could invite them to our place."
Paul smirked. "Our place…. You're getting comfortable here. How was your day? Utla seemed impressed with your hard work."
Bella blushed, and smiled. "It was actually quite brutal, I had to skin a poor rabbit. And then I had to help with the drying of the meat. But I must admit that I'm enjoying this freedom and this simple life. Taking this time off everything is giving me a different perspective on my life."
Paul sighed. "I'm going to take this time off from pack duty and school to get back in a more equilibrate mental state. I've always been a hothead, but phasing had really pushed me into a monster. And I'm not speaking about the wolf, I'm speaking about myself. Watching you being proud of my kills, and taking your time for learning the language, made me feel ashamed of how I treated you yesterday."
Bella stopped, and turned to look at Paul. She walked closer to him, and placed a hand on his mouth. "I've already forgiven you, let's not talk about that anymore."
Paul nodded, and they walked into Taha Aki's tepee.
The evening was interesting, Bella copied Utla and served her 'husband' the food. She tried to ignore Paul's sniggers. Then they talked about the hunt and the work the women did today. At the end Bella asked Paul to invite them to dinner the next night, Taha Aki seemed surprised, but Utla smiled widely and nodded.
Bella had actually seen some herbs in the field, and she wanted to try to cook meat with different ingredients.
They bid their goodbyes to the couple, and went to sleep in their tepee. Bella didn't even bother with complaining about the sleeping arrangements. She was tired and Paul's body heat, due mostly to the wolf, was what she needed. She scuttled closer to Paul, he stayed silent but pulled her into his arms, and after a while they both fell asleep.
…...
The next day they woke up, and went for breakfast. Before he left, Bella raised her hand and placed it around his neck. Quickly she pulled him down, and pecked him on his lips. "Don't get your knickers on a twist. It's just for show." She whispered. "Stay safe and hunt well, my kidido."
Paul looked at her intensely, and she felt the blush bloom on her cheeks. "Have a productive day too, my shipa." Then glanced at her some more before he followed the hunters for the day.
Bella turned around, and spotted Utla with the rabbits, and the birds of the previous day. She sat with her, and they started working, the previous night Bella had noticed a nice necklace on Taha Aki. She looked at Utla, and tried to explain that she wanted to make a similar necklace for Paul. A friendly gesture, and an apology for breaking his one.
Utla seemed to understand, and went to take some bones and shells and showed Bella how to make it. She knew that it was going to take time to do the perfect necklace, so she placed everything on the side to work on it later, and the two women went on to skin and dispose of the kills.
Bella took the time while working to think about her relationship with Edward. She now knew that her behaviour with and after him had been quite crazy. She had let him and Alice dictate her every move, like she was a child. However Bella had never been a child and she had looked after herself and her mother all her life, so Edward's behaviour was patronising. And Alice's attempts to create a Bella's version of herself had hit on her confidence and made her feel inadequate. Overall her relationship with the Cullens had been unbalanced, and due to Edward's decision to keep her human, that relationship would never change.
She sighed, it was hard to realise she had been a fool, a fool in love, but a fool nonetheless. Now she was aware of how she had failed her friends and her father, and most of all how she had used Jacob because he had made her feel better. Paul had been right in kicking her ass the first time they talked.
Now her mind focused on Paul, he had been rude and angry, but the time here was showing her another side of him. And to be quite honest with herself she liked the carefree Paul, he definitely didn't have a happy upbringing and turning into a wolf had probably exacerbated his character. Bella was aware as well that Paul was handsome in a manly way, and that spending time with him might bring forth feelings that would be unrequited. After all Paul was definitely a ladies man, and he would not change his ways for her, and to add to it there was Jacob, who liked her more than as a friend and Paul for sure would not disrespect him.
Overall Bella had a productive day with Utla, but what made her even happier was that she was getting over Edward. She now hoped not to fall for the charm of her fake husband because she knew there was no chance of them being anything but a fake couple.
…..
Paul and the hunters came back in the late afternoon and Bella took one of the rabbits to cook for dinner. She hurriedly went back to their tepee with Paul in tow.
"What's with all this hurry?" He asked.
"I need time to skin the rabbit, and cook the meat for tonight." She whispered, and then she sat in front of the fire starting preparations for the meal.
The silence was comfortable for her, but when she looked up she realised that Paul was watching her intensely, and she blushed. She bit her lip, unsure whether to talk to him or not. Finally her curiosity won. "Why are you staring at me?"
He smirked. "Does it bother you? I was just watching you prepare dinner, you seem to know a lot about cooking."
"It's because of how I grew up." She finally said. "My mother Renee is a good friend, but she's quite flaky and easily distracted, so I basically looked after us since I was eight. I cooked, cleaned, paid the bills and sent her to work every day. It's not her fault if she couldn't be a mother in the real sense of the word, I can look after myself and that's what matters. I still can't believe that I let the Cullens take over my life like I was a child. Probably I had missed a family, and they were portraying the picture of something perfect."
Paul nodded. "I know how it feels not to have a childhood, only I turned angry and hateful. Although you dating a leech isn't what I would call being smart. Now though I understand a little bit more the reason behind it. Can I ask you something else? What did you like about him specifically?"
Bella shrugged her shoulders. "I guess the mystery beside his good looks. The Cullens were avoiding everyone and then I got there, he saved my life twice and then I noticed how different they were. So I went to talk with Jacob, and I might have flirted with him to get him telling me the story of the Cold Ones and the Protectors. After I realised that he was a vampire, I guess I was flattered that someone like him would ever notice me."
Paul nodded. "I saw it in Jacob's mind how sly were, if I didn't know better it looked like you were really interested in him. Poor fool, women do have more brains than men. However, I can see why the leech liked you, you're smart, kind and beautiful."
Bella blushed, she wasn't used to total honesty and she couldn't believe that he thought that she was beautiful. She was curious about him too. "What about you? Have you ever dated anyone seriously? Have you met someone that you might like more than just for … sex?"
He sighed. "Even if I liked someone more, I won't pursue a relationship unless it's with my imprint. And before you ask what it is, it's the way the wolves find their soulmates, after we phase the first time that we meet the eyes of the girl, bam, she's our world and nothing or no one else matters. So you would agree with me that it would be cruel and pointless to date a girl and then drop her like yesterday's news when I meet my supposed other half."
"You don't like imprinting, do you? It seems to me that the idea of a person exactly right for you, that will never leave you and be at your side forever isn't that bad." She said, still thinking that it was what she had wanted with Edward.
"It's not all rainbows and prettiness, you are actually tied to a woman that can hurt or crash you with just one word, there is a compulsion to just see and breath for her. And what if I want someone who isn't right for me but it's my choice? What if I want to be free to break it off if I feel like it? Imprinting prevents me from hurting her, but what about me? Who protects me if she isn't kind hearted?" He told her, and she could almost taste the anguish behind his words. "But it doesn't matter, I'm too stubborn for imprinting, it's not going to happen to me."
"Has anyone imprinted in the pack?" She asked him.
He went on to tell her about Sam and Emily, Kim and Jared. Two imprinted wolves and three not imprinted ones.
Utla and Taha Aki arrived soon, and their talk about imprinting ended.
Bella served dinner and they had a nice time with the other couple, but her mind was wandering. She was thinking about soulmates, and imprinting, but mostly about Paul who never had a choice in his life. She felt sorry for him, because if he imprinted he wasn't even going to be free to choose whom to love.
