Disclaimer. The characters belong to Shonda Rhimes. The various references, quotations used in this document do not belong to me. This work is non-profit just for fun. Thank you for reading and giving your opinion


I am sincerely sorry that I was not able to update earlier. Medical worries in my family took up all my time and really I couldn't do better. I'll finish translating this story anyway and I'll try to do it for the best. Thanks for reading yet and the reviews are always welcome.


Chapter 18 Home, Children, Dogs, and Even Chickens

The days pass in their pink bubble, Callie and Arizona spin the perfect love, recovering the reflexes of the past, enjoying all these little interactions of daily life that they had missed, also discovering aspects of their personality that had evolved. Throughout their history, they had always loved each other passionately in good and bad times, even when they couldn't stand each other, even when they was mad at each other, deep down they had continued to love each other.

At present, it was even stronger, the fear of being definitively lost, makes them aware of the absolute need to listen to each other. Sometimes we need things to be missing, to measure their real value. They are both determined not to waste this new chance. They build their happiness, moment after moment, step by step, twig by twig as the bird makes its nest. Sofia, meanwhile, is in heaven, to the delight of her mothers she became again this hopping and joyful little girl that she had always been, she just needed her two parents both, and seeing them happy together, could only satisfies her.

Sitting on the couch as Callie tries to put their daughter to sleep with the ritual story of the evening, Arizona is fine-tuning the "Robbins-Herman" center project. It is very ambitious, she wants it, to be a specialized center for women, so that she can live their pregnancy, in peace and security, taking advantage of the most innovative medical methods. She is extremely invested in the safety of women during pregnancy, childbirth and postpartum.

Indeed, among developed countries, U.S.A ranks first in the world in maternal mortality rates. Unfortunately, on several occasions, she made the painful experience of losing a mother ,and had been desperate every time when what should have been the most beautiful moment in a family's life turned into a nightmare.

This will be the "Robbins-Herman Center for Women's Health", where,will be practiced there not only fetal surgery, but also medically assisted procreation, voluntary termination of pregnancy, and above all a rigorous monitoring of women throughout the gestation, regardless of their social level and their ability to pay high medical costs . She is enthusiastic, and wants to share this craze with Callie who literally crashes on the couch by her side.

- I thought I was going to collapse reading! ! Seriously I can't take it anymore, "Frozen" in film, in book, in music, in poster, disguise. It turns into obsession, we have to stop it, or we're gonna have to pay for therapy for years for her and for me!

- All the kids do that, , she will eventually move on, I am sure that one day, you will regret "Frozen"

Callie more than perplexed raises her eyebrows, with an incredulous smile unable to imagine that she could one day deplore seeing finally disappear from her living room all the Disney panoply. Arizona continues to nod formally while joking

- Yes, yes I'm sure, especially when she will have her period look grunge or punk or worse gothic look!

- Oh my God stop, stop! Even when she was two years old, we couldn't force her to put on tights when she didn't want to, I don't even want to think about the next few years!

Callie's hands covering her eyes in order to chase away the image of her teenage daughter, deliberately changes conversation.

- So you're moving on?

- Yes, look, I would like us, to be able to respond to the different difficulties of women around pregnancy. A child must come into the world in the best conditions for him and his mother. We would have to find patrons to provide care when health insurance doesn't cover them. I would also like us to work with an adoption association. You know, I often think of Sloan and Marc's grandson. Women must be free and choice rather than be subjected to the situation. We really need a team with a psychologist, a full-time obstetrician-gynecologist, a fertility specialist, a fetal surgeon,ME, of course, but as I'm also a pediatric surgeon I will be able to intervene on the baby if necessary after delivery, she said, a touch of pride on her happy face. Herman will be in charge of the training, we will be able to open, later on the same model other Robbins-Herman centers across the country, and thus have a real impact on these dramatic figures. The maternal death rate is not just a private tragedy, it is really a public health disaster, and I believe that it is up to us, doctors, to take up that challenge.

Callie drinking in the words of the passionate woman, impressed as much by the quality of the program as by all her humanity and empathy, she smiles at the happiness that reads on the blonde's blossoming face, at the thought of being able to improve things. She is truly the colonel's daughter of United States Marine Corps, she cares about serving her country, with what she does best: her job as an outstanding surgeon. Arizona couldn't be perfectly happy without her professional life. She remembers that except for the fear of not being up to scratch for Sofia, one of her biggest fears, when she lost her leg was not being able to regain her place in the operating room. She was born to save lives.

- Yes you're brilliant, that sounds really great but ... You really think you're going to be able to do anything. I mean we didn't talk about it again but a few days ago you wanted to carry our children, and then there's Sofia.

Arizona suddenly felt that she was projected into the past, in this period, after Callie discovered, she was unable to carry their child, when no solution she proposed seemed to suit her wife. She rejected Arizona's offer to carry their child, she was more than chilly about surrogate mothers. In retrospect, Arizona was convinced ,Callie's unusual hesitations, incessant doubts, objections to everything were nothing but signs of depression. At that time explaining this attitude by the shock of not being able to bear children, this had not really alerted Arizona, and however all of this had ended up in a painful breakup.

Feeling anguish invaded her, she hardly , she is no longer the same, she is no longer the one who carried on her shoulders such guilt, the one who no longer dared to make a decision, no longer dared to fight for what she wanted, no longer even dared to raise the slightest objection.

- You're going to tell me again that it is not possible, you're going to start doubting again...

Callie seeing the mask change on her ex-wife's face already regrets the way the discussion is taking, she immediately interrupts her

-No, no Arizona, I'm just asking how we're going to do it. You seem to be excited about this center and it's a great project and you're great at wanting to do all this. But I'm afraid we're not going to get it all done. It may be ... rushed, and then three children that's a lot.? Don't you think we got a bit excited?

Callie feels the blonde's deep exasperation, on the one hand because Arizona Robbins hates cutting people's speech and does it only when she is extremely irritated, on the other hand she sees the small wrinkle above her nose which signals that her eyebrows are frowning, that her brain is functioning at the speed of light and that she is going to embark on a long, very long speech.

- Okay Callie don't tell me the same story, I have already heard this one: "We're fragile and we couldn't stand... Bla Bla Bla." Because, last time I should not have even accepted this argument. If we are fragile you don't even talk about having a child. If you don't want kids anymore you say it clearly, if you only want one, you say it too and if it's just that you don't trust me enough and well... Her voice is shaking a little because of the emotion, the sobbing that she suppresses... Well that would just be really lame because that would mean that you really didn't understand anything.

She utters her words in apnea, staring at Callie with an assurance that she had not seen her for a long time

I know, I have sometimes been hesitant in our history but when I took the step, when I signed up, I never left the ship. So I'm here and I want to commit to your side for the rest of my life, because I'm confident. I'm not perfect, you're not perfect either, I certainly haven't always lived up to it, you haven't always been. If we're not able to clean up the slate and start from scratch then it's not even worth it, because we have already done it.

Shocked by the vehemence of the remarks, Callie remains speechless, while Arizona collapses on the couch, realizing that she has given in again to panic and explosion. Right now she has the feeling that their personalities have reversed while Callie seems calmer, soothed, she, on the contrary, jumps into everything impulsively she wants everything and right now, she lives as if she was going to die tomorrow,

As far as I'm concerned, now my main plan in life is that you are happy, that you and Sofia are happy.

Callie terribly touched, kiss her wildly, also taking advantage of having a chance to stop the verbal marathon. After answering the kiss, Arizona moves away to take the brunette's face in her hands, she guesses that Callie needs reassurance, plunging her gaze into that of the brunette to convince her of her sincerity she adds

- We will do it if we both want to, because we are both and our priority will be our family, My priority is our family. If you're okay with that then we'll get there Callie. If it takes longer to finalize the center, I will take more time but I will be there for us, for you, for Sofia and for the bits of cabbage to come. Promised

- Because this is still the decision of a lifetime ...

- Callie, if you have any doubts, if you don't want to, you have to say it, but if you do, please trust me. I want everything with you, the house, the kids, the dogs and even the chickens! I love you Calliope, my life without you, without our family it is not my life.

A long sigh of relief escapes from Callie's lips, she still needed to hear these words

- It's that you're so different, you look so sure, I think I have to get used to this Arizona.

She kisses her again, Arizona breaks the hug

- No more kissing and hugging! We've got work to do.

- What job? regrets Callie making a pout disappointed at the distance of her partner

- We have some medical exams to go throught, before starting the process, and then I brought a list of potential donors, we have to make a choice.

Arizona scrutinizes Callie for a moment before questioning her.

- So we do it, you're sure?

- Yes! We're doing it.

They focus on potential donors, but Callie seems less concerned, Arizona feels her distant. She watches her for a moment from the corner of her eye, trying to guess what is going on. She takes a deep breath, while tidying up the files and turns in front of her

- Ok Calliope, I think I really caught fire. it doesn't look like me, but I'm so sure that my life is with you, that... Well, whatever, it's obviously not your case, so let's just forget all about it right now, it makes you too uncomfortable.

Callie bewildered, doesn't really grasp what's going on. Does Arizona really mean it's over, that she doesn't believe in it anymore? Is she still changing her mind and running away at the slightest problem?

- Me too Arizona, I know that my life is with you, you are the only person who can make me happy...

- All right Callie, we already have a wonderful child. I love you, and even though I can live without you, I live so badly, I don't want it anymore. So if you don't want another child don't talk about it anymore, I don't want it to become a problem between us again.

Callie interrupts her by raising the tone

- That's exactly what we must avoid! We can't start over the same way, we can't make the same mistakes again and again

Feeling that she got carried away, she continues lower

- You're not listening to me Arizona. I really want children with you, but we have to function differently if we want it to work, we have to work together. I do not think we can save ourselves the trouble of talking about everything that has hurt us, drawing conclusions, and establishing some rules, so as not to make the same mistakes. We're not gonna to lie to each other, Arizona, we have a real communication problem. Look, you want kids, I want kids and we're going to get into a fight, life isn't going to spare us any more difficult times, so how are we going to get through them if we don't fix these things?

Arizona puzzled but relieved admits that Callie is not wrong. They have left so many misunderstandings and unspoken ruining their relationship, they have lost control so many times by acting impulsively. She suggests half worried, half sarcastic

- Couple therapy? I'm not very fan, last time it didn't end very well, you left me I remind you

- I think we've become mature enough to do it together.

Arizona wriggling her fingers, staring at her knees, reveals in turn a real discomfort. The Latina lays her hands on hers to calm her down, raising her eyes from her knees, she crosses Callie's loving gaze and accepts a painful smile.

- Okay, you have an idea to start with?

- I suggest that we think about a few rules separately and then we give ourselves a date and we talk about it proposes Callie

- Okay with the rules approve of Arizona, but talking about the past I don't know … I wouldn't want it to turn into a settling of accounts or a succession of blame

- You're right. So I suggest that we define each one the reasons why we think that we hurt the other, and then we discuss it. Is that okay with you?

- Yeah, I think it could be good. Looks like you've thought about it a lot. Amazes Arizona putting a brief kiss on the lips of her caring companion

-It's a method that my shrink used...

- Waouh Calliope Torres went to a shrink, I can't believe it! Arizona exclaims smiling, absolutely aghast by the radical change of the brunette who had always resisted this type of approach. Callie a little embarrassed to have let out this detail, pointing out her mistake of leaving everything, and hurting her family, for a so-called happiness that she could not even live, confesses in a low voice

- I had to understand why a certain blonde definitely ruined me for love.

Arizona closes her eyes to this revelation, they will actually have to communicate, she, who thought that Callie had stopped loving her and had found the happiness she had not known to bring her

- You are not ruined for love, you are definitely ruined for love without me...

Callie giggles at Arizona's smugness, but nothing pleases her more than her partner's newfound confidence

- Hey it's not me who said it, it's you. So, when are we going to do this?

- It's up to you, I would have tended to want to give you time, but it seems that you become, super, super fast ironic Callie

- Hum maybe to love you replica maliciously Arizona, her face however covering a real anxiety but there um ... I'm gonna need a little time I think

"Okay! We've got a little over nine months to get to the point anyway. Why don't we go back to our research on the biological superman in the meantime?


Thank you for reading