I'm Jake. No last name needed. I'm sure at this point, you know why, and I don't really want to get into it. No need to waste more time. Actually, at the moment I'm a bit annoyed in general. See, I was trying to get a hold of the team, and no one would answer the phone. No one! How am I supposed to lead a group against an alien invasion if people won't answer their phones? Even my cousin Rachel, who I guess is pretty, didn't answer the phone. Not that I cared more about her not answering than others, I just...anyway I'm annoyed.

I was flying in my peregrine falcon morph toward the mall. I figured, if the Animorphs wouldn't answer their phones at home, then maybe I should look into getting us cell phones somehow. It would help with the whole potential eavesdropping problem with any Controllers living with us, like my brother Tom. So, I was heading to Radio Shack in the hopes that I could find a good deal on some phones. I had overheard Tom talking about buying a few, and whether he was a Controller or not (he was), I needed a good deal on phones. The combination of being teenagers and Animorphs left us pretty low on money.

I landed behind some Dumpsters on one side of the mall; always a symbol of our glamorous life as superheroes. I went through one of the many mall entrances, the one that directed shoppers past the food court. As I checked the mall directory, I couldn't help but notice the food court was looking particularly...disgusting. Not many people were there, oddly, but it was a mess. I found Radio Shack on the map, and made my way to that side of the mall.

As I walked to the far corner of the mall, my mind wandered. Things had been heating up between us and the Yeerks recently. Marco losing his home and having to go completely off the grid was evidence of that. What was the end game? What did we need to do to go on the offensive, rather than always reacting defensively?

There was a group in front of me walking side-by-side, taking up most of the aisle walkway. Not really paying attention, I did notice the attractiveness of the blonde girl, before my senses came back with a jolt and I realized I was tailing my friends, and had been checking out my cousin.

Yikes.

"Guys! Wait up!" I called from behind them. Marco was the first to turn around.

"Hey, our Fearless Leader! Fancy seeing you here."

"Prince Jake!" Ax said. "It is impeccable timing with which you have arrived. We do have a bit of a situation at the moment. Ment. T-t-t-t. It's very difficult to get over how fun T sounds are."

Tobias wiped some of Ax's spit off his cheek, Marco rolled his eyes and suppressed a grin, and my adrenaline flared at Ax's words.

A mission.

We made our way to Radio Shack as two separate groups of three; Ax, Rachel, and me in one group, and Tobias, Cassie, and Marco in the other group. We didn't want to draw unwanted attention, as usual, so splitting up was best. Plus, having someone in morph in each group (Ax and Tobias as human), would allow us a way to thought-speak communicate between groups.

It was a strategy I had picked up recently.

Ax filled me in on the details of Radio Shack. I had to admit, while any mission could help us against the Yeerks, this cell phone ploy seemed particularly...ridiculous.

"Ax, on a scale of 1 to 10, how worried should we be about this?" I asked, as we stood outside the Radio Shack entrance. The other group was in the nearby family bathroom.

"What is this arbitrary scale?" Ax wondered aloud.

"A '10' would mean we have a serious problem on our hands," Rachel explained.

‹Humans being unsuspectingly turned into Controllers is always a threat,› Ax said, still in human morph, but opening his thought-speak for all six of us to hear. ‹Yet I cannot help but feel this particular plan is not a very good one. It is actually an impressively bad plot. We should be able to take care of this easily.›

We heard Tobias thought-speak from behind the restroom door. ‹Cassie is asking if we should come back later or deal with this now, and Marco is complaining about being in a bathroom.›

‹We could make a plan back at the food court,› Ax suggested to us.

"I'm not sure, Ax," I answered. "It was kind of a mess when I came through that side of the mall."

"Yeah, Jake, you missed out," Rachel smiled. "Visser One was going nuts on a cinnamon bun and freaked a lot of people out."

"Visser One?! Here?" I whispered loudly.

"You can hardly blame an Andalite for losing control to the amazing sensation of taste," Ax said. "Particularly with Cinnabon, that always fills me with happiness. Appiness. Piness—"

Rachel dove to frantically cover Ax's mouth, but her hand slipped.

"Penis!" Ax shouted, causing many heads to turn our direction.

‹We heard that in here,› Tobias updated us. ‹Marco is now whining about wanting to be in that group, as it seems more "fun".›

"Ax! I know mouth-sounds are fun, but chill out!" I quietly yelled, glaring directly at him.

"I'm sorry, Prince Jake," he looked down at the floor. "It won't happen again."

"Fine," I said. "Can you let the others know we are coming into their bathroom?"

Minutes later, six cockroaches scuttled out from under the still-locked door of the family bathroom. We had to protect our clothes, and Marco had said something about a note, as well. I wasn't quite sure exactly what had happened at the food court, but I could only lead one mission at a time. The other details would have to wait.

‹Let's deal with Radio Shack,› I told the group as we ran into the store on high-powered roach legs. ‹Then you can tell me about whatever happened with Visser One.›

We motored under the sales clerk desk, into the back room. Vibrations from voices told us there was a small group of people in the storage closet. We had gotten pretty good at deciphering speech through a roach's hearing.

"She SAW the Yeerk?" a gruff-sounding man asked.

"Yes," came a meek answer. "She saw it and ran out of the store. I don't think anyone would believe her, though."

"Believe there was a bug in a phone?" Gruff-guy snapped. "Or that there was an alien in the phone?"

"You're lucky Visser One had to leave the mall abruptly," a high-pitched woman's voice said. "Very lucky. I suggest you shut this plan down."

"The phone plan?" the meek-sounding guy answered. "Is that a pun? Are you making a joke?"

"What is the matter with you?!" Gruff-guy snarled. "This whole hide-Yeerks-in-cell-phones thing was YOUR dumb idea. Visser One never approved, so I suggest we just pretend the whole thing never happened. As of now, you're being reassigned."

The storage closet door opened and three sets of shoes marched out.

‹Well guys, what do you think?› Tobias asked.

‹I think there was plenty more room for cell phone puns,› Marco quickly answered.

‹It sounds to me like this scheme died before it started,› Rachel said. ‹The Yeerks took care of it for us.›

‹I agree,› I said. ‹Let's get out of here. And tell me about what happened in the food court.›

I wasn't paying attention. I had mentally moved on to the next task. But all of my attention was refocused when I saw a foot land directly on top of one of us—I couldn't even tell who it was—squishing the roach body to the floor.