Change My Destiny 5: Convictions
AN: Thanks for those who liked, faved, followed, and reviewed once again! This one is another Louise-centric chapter. After this its back to the "main story".
To Guest: I am aware that the rune mindbending is fanon. I appreciate the heads up but the story is an AU for a reason. You can expect that I will be adding and twisting plot elements so that I may surprise you all ;) I have some devious plans for the runes among other things. I hope you look forward to them!
Enjoy the story!
It had been days since the disastrous miscast. Louise wasn't punished severely for the damages; however, she had excused herself from further attendance, and instead spent her time being tutored by Avalon. She had slowly been progressing in her meditation, but every now and again Avalon liked to mix things up on her.
Panting heavily from the long, physical exertion, Louise let herself fall onto the forest floor. Her clothes were a mess. Her hair was tangled. Her body burned in places she was sure that they weren't supposed to. And she now had a greater appreciation for the spring breeze and afternoon sun.
"Alright, that's enough exercise for today," said Avalon, finished stretching his limbs. His chipper attitude irritated her somewhat.
"Why are we doing these again?" Louise asked between gasps.
Avalon gave her a relaxed look, placing his left hand on his elbow and gesturing with his right. "Why? Well, because it keeps you strong. Just because you're a mage doesn't mean you should neglect your body. This will help you build the endurance you need when you're in a pinch. Besides, it's a good way to relieve stress."
Helping her off the ground, Louise reluctantly stood up, her limbs shaking slightly as she regained her footing. But she had to admit, she did feel pretty good.
"Whatever. Let's just head back before it gets dark."
The two headed back to the academy in silence, Louise's mind wandering. She wondered about what she was doing with her life. She wondered about what her family was doing now. She wondered what the point of all this was. She was glad that Avalon was keeping her busy, but when the days came to an end and Louise was left with her thoughts, she couldn't help but wonder about where the future was headed. She knew that worrying about it wouldn't solve anything, and that all she could do was…
Great, now I'm just running my thoughts in circles.
Giving her head a shake as they approached the school grounds, Louise internally groaned as she heard a particular, irritating laugh from a certain, infamous boy. A pair came into view as Louise and Avalon passed the entrance gate and approached the main doors. The taller of the two was grudgingly handsome. He had fair skin and striking, blonde hair, but what irritated her was how he blatantly used his looks to chase skirts all over the academy. Such was his latest victim, a younger first year that she had seen around. She had long, brown hair, tied into a ponytail.
"I'm good at making soufflé!" the female said, fluttering her eyelashes up at him.
"I would love to try it sometime," the boy, Guiche, replied, with an easy smile that made the girl giggle.
"Really?!" she said, excitement in her voice.
"Of course, my dear Katie. I cannot tell lies in front of your eyes," he whispered in to her ear, making Katie shiver in delight. God, what a player.
"Master Guiche…" Katie said, clearly in love with him. If she had a sign around her neck that proclaimed "HEAD OVER HEELS FOR YOU", it couldn't have been more obvious.
"There cannot be any deceitfulness in my feelings toward you…" He went on. Not wanting to hear any more, Louise strode passed them, rolling her eyes as she did so. She didn't get very far.
"Hold it, zero."
Louise didn't want to stop. She intended to ignore him. But as soon as she heard that infuriating word, she stopped dead in her tracks.
"Her name is Louise. It would do you well to use it." Louise turned to see Avalon glaring daggers at Guiche. The blonde fop nearly flinched, but he played it off with a flourish of his hair.
"Ah, very well. Please forgive my insolence, Louise the zero." He purposefully emphasized her title. Avalon's scowl deepened, but Louise placed a hand on his shoulder. She was too tired for this.
"Just leave it alone. I don't care."
"You don't have to care for me to care. I won't let him treat you like this."
"Hah, you think I treat her badly? Well, I suppose it makes sense for a commoner to be illusioned so." He brushed his hair aside. "Very well. Since you have been more timid than I expected, zero, I will show my grace this once and allow you to leave. But know this; don't think I didn't catch that disdain in your eyes. I will not tolerate it if I see it in the future, and will make sure you'll regret it." A cocky smirk spread across his lips.
Louise grabbed Avalon by the wrist before he could do anything more, pulling him down the hall. She was determined to remain indifferent to his words.
Just ignore him. He's right, anyway. So what does it matter?
-Change My Destiny-
"I just don't get it. Why doesn't she stand up for herself?"
Avalon was back in his room, pacing back and forth. Sasha was sitting on the bed, combing her hair as she patiently listened.
"Everyone bullies her just because her magic is different. And to top it all off, she just takes it! I've heard from Tabitha that she wasn't always like this. She said that Louise used to be more aggressive against her bullying, but now…" Avalon sighed. "Now it's like she's given up. I don't know what to do."
"Avalon, I understand that you're worried about her, but this is something Louise needs to confront herself. Bullying is more than just the physical, Louise especially. She's been mentally abused ever since she had her first miscast, and is just weary of it all."
"So you heard from Siesta, too, eh?" Avalon sighed as he sat down beside her. "I just… I feel so helpless watching her like this. Colbert and I want to do something to make her feel better. But she's been more closed off than usual. I think it has something to do with our training together."
"You think that teaching her magic was wrong?"
"No, I don't. But she's taking it in a way I didn't expect. I thought she would be overjoyed about being able to learn it. Now it's like she wished she never knew at all."
Placing an arm around his shoulders, Sasha gently pulled her son into a hug. His body slumped in her grip.
"Don't worry. She will come through. Louise seems like the kind of girl who doesn't need someone else to solve her problems for her, because she's not looking for a solution. For a girl like her, what she needs is to be understood, to be listened to. So believe in her. Underneath it all, she's a strong willed girl. She just needs time to sort herself out. This is new to her, and confronting one's feelings is never easy."
Avalon nodded.
-Change My Destiny-
Look, its Louise the Zero!
Watch out, she might blow you up! That's all your good for, isn't it?!
"Louise the zero! Zero chest, zero grades, and zero friends!"
Louise slowly opened her eyes as she was once again pulled out her dream. She placed a hand on her head, feeling drained.
"Again… huh?" she whispered to herself. "Honestly, I'm getting tired of seeing that dream."
Pushing herself up from her bed, she slowly prepared herself for the day. She combed her hair, dressed herself, and haphazardly fixed her sheets. As she did so, Avalon knocked at her door, his timing impeccable.
"Louise, it's me. Are you ready?"
Opening the door, Louise stared blankly at Avalon's cheeky smile. In his hands was a basket filled with baked bread and fruits. The smell made her stomach growl.
"Avalon, it's the weekend. I'm sore and tired from yesterday, and would like to study in the library. Can we please not practice today?"
"Oh, I know. That's what this is for." He held up the basket. "I figured you could use some sunshine, so I had Siesta prepare us some food. Now come on!" Avalon grabbed her arm before she could protest, pulling her out of her room and down the hall. Louise sighed, figuring it would be fine to eat outside for a change of pace.
The pair settled at a table set up in the south-western courtyard of the main entrance. It was close by and relatively empty, which Louise was greatly thankful for. They ate their meal in blissful silence.
Unfortunately it didn't last, as Guiche and the first year had shown up, along with another moments later.
"Guiche, there you are, I was—what is the meaning of this? Were those rumours about you and the first year true?!"
A stern, female voice cut through their peaceful brunch. Louise turned to the main doors to see Montmorency, Guiche's declared fiancée, growling through her teeth, her blue eyes flashing dangerously. Guiche and Katie stood some feet away from her, caught holding each other from the looks of things, frozen and terrified. Guiche immediately let go and pushed Katie aside with a rough shove. She fell back, shocked beyond words.
"No, no, his dear Montmorency, those are just baseless accusations! I cannot lie in front of your eyes, your love and beauty are too precious to him for such acts of detriment," he declared with a flourish of his arms, his voice confident and loud. His words made Montmorency blush, and Katie pause. Avalon groaned with disgust.
"W-What are you talking about, Guiche? Didn't you want to try my Soufflé? I made a basket just for you!" Katie raised the basket on the floor beside her. Guiche vehemently shook his head.
"I do not know what you are talking about, first year. I don't even know your name!"
"This asshole...!" Avalon stood up, but Katie acted before Avalon could, rising to her feet and approaching Guiche with slow steps. Louise watched with disinterest, something about Katie's attitude greatly irritating her.
What are you doing? Stand up for yourself!
"G-Guiche, I don't understand! What's wrong?! It's me, Katie," she cried out, tears welling up in her eyes, her voice hitching with a deep sadness. As she drew closer to Guiche, Montmorency interfered, standing from her seat and moving in front of Katie, slapping away the basket in her hands with a loud smack! Katie lost her balance from the force of the blow, falling on her behind in an undignified manner. Avalon moved to her side, crouching protectively over her as Montmorency approached. Louise sighed in frustration, moving from her seat as well.
"You, you're Louise the zero's familiar," said Montmorency. Avalon either ignored her or was too angry to care.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" he shouted as Louise approached. Montmorency scoffed.
"What's wrong?! I'll tell you what's wrong! Blame this little trash-born slut! How dare a low class noble like you, try to seduce my man?!" Montmorency roared. Katie let out another squeak as Montmorency completely on Katie. Katie's eyes began to well up, and she began shaking her head. "No, you're wrong… Guiche said he loved me, that we would be together forever…!"
Louise felt disgusted. How could she be so pathetic, so weak, so helpless?
It irritated her to no end.
"Is that true, Guiche?!" At her words, Montmorency turned to Guiche once more.
"N-No my dear! I would never cheat on you willingly! She—she used love potions on me, conjured by her brothers and sisters!"
Quiet gasps came from Montmorency's lips. Louise sighed. That was dangerous territory.
"That's a blind accusation! Where's your proof that she, a first year, could even make such a thing?!" Avalon cried out in Katie's defence. Montmorency stilled at his words, seeking clarification from Guiche. He chuckled nervously, but didn't lose himself.
"Katie's family is well known for having a long line of water mages, commoner. They could easily acquire the ingredients necessary for it!" Montmorency muttered in agreement, making Avalon seethe. Katie burst into tears, saying it wasn't true. Avalon silently took the girl into his arms. Katie didn't fight, weeping loudly into his clothes.
Having had enough, Louise stepped between Montmorency and Avalon.
"Alright, that's enough. It's not even noon yet and you two are already bickering." Louise met Montmorency with a steady, indifferent glare.
"Hmph, well if it isn't Louise the zero. I should have expected such weak control over your familiar. Pull him aside, I have unfinished business with her!" Montmorency pointed vehemently at Katie.
"If any of it were true, I would, but your boyfriend is obviously a lying cheat! He's manipulating you like he did Katie! Don't fall for his cheap one liner's, you deserve better than a worm like him!" Louise crossed her arms and glared at Guiche accusingly. Montmorency seemed to waver ever so slightly, but Guiche had a completely different reaction.
"How dare you!" Guiche cried out, his face red with embarrassment. "So this is the kindness I get for treating you with grace? You really are nothing but a zero! Always destroying school property, you aren't even worth calling a student at this prestigious academy! You may have fooled Osmond, Colbert, and our fellow classmates, but not me! I see you for what you really are; you're nothing but liars and tricksters! Both you, and Katie!"
Guiche grinned desperately. "You know, I just realized; the rumor that you summoned an elf was probably fake too, wasn't it? Just another ruse fabricated by the delicate zero! How low will you go just to prove that you are a mage?! You're nothing, zero, and you always will be!"
Louise trembled in anger as her shoulders slumped. She didn't know why she was feeling so, normally she would just be able to brush it off. Maybe it was because she just ate. Maybe it was because of her dream. Or maybe, just maybe, it was because of Katie.
Louise realized the moment she saw her that she saw herself in her; the helplessness, the clamouring, the need to feel appreciated. She just didn't want to admit it. She had been alone for so long, and when she finally proved herself by completing her summon, she was overjoyed Avalon dangled the opportunity of a lifetime in front of her, a chance to teach her what she had been searching for so long, and she took it without hesitation.
But she still messed up. She had given up on herself, but Avalon hadn't given up on her.
It was time to change that.
"You right; ever since I was born, I haven't been able to cast magic. Because of that, I was put through rigorous training by my family, my mother in particular, and was studied by numerous mages from across the continent, to see what was wrong with me. But they could never find out anything. As a last resort, my family sent me here." she growled, radiating intent. "I studied as hard as I could. I did everything I possibly think of, and read through every book in the library twice to see if I could find what was wrong with me. But nothing changed; never once have I been able to cast a spell properly. Everything I did just ends up exploding. But my summoning changed that. Avalon changed that! Yet you dare, you dare to call the one spell, the one thing I've done right in my entire life, the one person who gave me hope—a lie?!"
"And what about Katie?! She gave herself to you, and you threw her away like she was just another used tissue! You call me a liar, but what about you, huh?! What happened to all the promises and sweet words you whispered to this poor girl? If there's one thing that I hate more than myself, its people who throw others away like useless trash!"
Involuntarily, Guiche and Montmorency clung to each other, stepping back at Louise's cold fury. Her eyes burned with an intense hatred and her body pored with sinister intent.
"That's right, cowards! I won't tolerate your bullying any longer, and if you truly think that I did not summon an elf, then you're free to duel her and her son at your leisure! They will destroy you without a second thought!" Louise raised her hand, pointing at the two intently. She intended to order Avalon to teach them a lesson, but it seemed he was ahead of her. Already, he was moving.
"Arc Blast."
The lightning came down, inches from their faces. Montmorency and Guiche screamed as they were deafened by the noise, falling flat onto their behinds. They clenched their eyes shut, momentarily opening them to see Avalon kneeling just in front of where they stood moments before, the ground scorched black and a deadly looking blue spear stabbed into the ground. He watched over them impassively, lightning dancing around his figure.
The two ran away, screaming.
Avalon sighed, dismissing his weapon. Louise walked up to Katie, who was still on the floor, amazed and very slightly afraid. She extended her hand.
"Can you stand up?"
Looking dumbly between her hand and his face, Katie took it, smiling.
-Change My Destiny-
After taking some time to recuperate, Louise and Katie retreated to Professor Colbert's shed and told him what had transpired. Avalon stayed a little ways behind and instead chose to bring their meal to the dining hall where they would meet later.
"My word. I shall make sure that the headmaster learns of this and punishes Guiche promptly. You can count on me Louise, miss Katie." Colbert gave her an assuring smile, placing his hand on Katie's shoulder.
"Thank you very much for helping me." Katie held her head low, but Colbert shook his head.
"Nonsense, its the least I could do. Accusations of love potions is a serious offense. You could sue his family for it, in fact. But I have reason to believe that isn't what you want?"
"No, professor. What Guiche did was… unforgivable, but trying to get back at him doesn't seem right to me."
"You have a good heart, miss Katie. Don't let fools like Guiche tarnish it." He turned to Louise and smiled, "In fact, I believe Louise and Avalon will be a good influence on you."
"Yes, I think so too," Katie replied with a smile. Louise smiled back awkwardly, but she still felt exposed and embarrassed after emotional outburst. Thankfully the other two didn't say anything about it. Colbert gave his goodbyes and departed as the pair went to the Alviss hall, finding Avalon sitting near the lefthand corner.
"Hey! What'd I miss?" Avalon waved as they returned, food levitating from the basket and into his hands. Katie gasped in awe.
"Wandless wind magic… You really are part elf! That's so cool! What else can you do?!" Her eyes began to shine. Avalon gave her a smile, chuckling.
"You think so? I mean, I guess I can do some cool tricks." Placing his food down, Avalon picked up his wooden plate before taking a moment to concentrate. His eyes were closed shut, and a green glow enveloped his hands as he crushed the plate into pieces.
"Oh my!" Katie shouted.
"That was a perfectly good plate, Avalon!" Louise added. Avalon, however, kept smiling as he eyed Louise.
"That's what you're worried about?"
"Knowing you, yes."
"Don't worry, don't worry! This is an easy fix!"
Avalon's hands glowed green again as he firmly pressed his palms to the shattered pieces, and the the green glow enveloped the broken table. The pieces of the plate began to move on their own and reassemble into one piece, solidifying. Katie clapped in amazement.
"Earth magic too! Elven magic is so versatile!"
"Its actually not earth magic. I'm using the mana in my body and the air around us instead. But you're right, its much more versatile than any of the elements." Avalon did what Louise had come to refer to as his involuntary flex, where he would clench his right hand to a fist tightly, then open it, summoning some mana as if to show off. Katie gazed in awe at the green particles as Louise rolled her eyes.
Avalon began speaking to Katie about his culture and magic, fascinating the girl as they ate. Louise became a little irritated with how well they hit it off, but whatever. Avalon was charismatic in that way. He even managed to get Tabitha to talk to him. Tabitha talked to no one except Kirche and herself.
After a while, they changed the subject.
"So… Louise, what is your family like?" Katie asked as they ate. Louise bit back a sigh as she cut up another piece of beef.
"I'm curious as well, Louise. You never talk about them," said Avalon.
"Yeah, come on! Avalon has already talked a bunch about his mom, and she seems so nice! What about you?"
"You know, both of you seem to have a very irritating trait of asking a lot of questions. But fair's fair, I suppose. My father is a Duke, one of the leading powers in Tristain's government and military, although he's retired now. My eldest sister, Eleanor, is the leading wind mage of Halkeginia's royal research division. My second eldest sister, Cattleya, was supposed to be the leader of the earth division, but she came down with an illness several years ago and hasn't been well since. She's still alive, but any strenuous activity is very difficult for her body to handle…" Louise let her voice die out, not wanting to speak any more about the subject. Katie, unfortunately, didn't seem to notice the heavy tone.
"What about your mother?"
"She's alive." Louise didn't say any more, and Katie finally got the hint, backing off the questions. Avalon gave her a curious look.
"You know, I could just read your mind, " Avalon said slyly. Louise frowned. He could do that?
"Then go ahead. I'll make sure to show you something that you will regret seeing."
"I've already seen you naked, Louise, nothing could be more terrifying than—!" Avalon started, but Louise furiously kicked his leg underneath the table, cutting him off as he half howled, half laughed in pain.
"You totally deserved that." Louise crossed her arms and pouted, blushing. Avalon gave her a thumbs up.
"It was worth it."
Katie looked between the two, slightly confused, but happy that they were getting along.
"W-wow, your family is really amazing… nothing like mine," Katie mumbled, staring down at her food quietly. Louise stopped chewing, taking a moment to look at the sad expression on her face. "My family is very poor, you know. My father is a baron, the fifth son in his family, so he didn't really get much inheritance. My mother… well, she's very strict."
"I can relate, to be honest. My mother is strict too," Louise contributed, hoping to alleviate the girl's depression somewhat. She didn't feel the need to, but it was the right thing to do. Avalon, having calmed down, nodded as well, but said nothing.
"I see. My mother… well, my parents didn't marry for love, actually. From what I've heard, my grandfather had given my father as a diplomatic gesture to a family friend, the Antoine's. I think he was hoping that the marriage would help our family with our financial situation at the time. It did, in a sense, but with the recent war in Albion, things have been very tense at home… My mother is used to living in wealth, so when my father sold our possessions to pay for the increased taxes, she got very mad."
Louise couldn't help but stop eating.
"I've heard of the Antoine's. They're a well-respected middle class family on the eastern side of Tristain, famous for their strong wind mages. I'm assuming you got your water magic from your father, then?" Louise answered Avalon's questioning gaze as Katie nodded. Although they weren't as wealthy as Louise's own family, (being related to the crown helped greatly) they were still well off. Katie's family was married into the Antoine's own? Strange, she hadn't heard of that at all.
But maybe it's because its Katie's family I haven't heard of it…
"I'm sorry," Louise said automatically. Katie seemed happy with it, giving her a thankful smile.
"Don't worry about it. They were able to send me here, so I've got to do my best and help support my family—"
"Hey… what's Katie doing with the zero?"
"You idiot, haven't you heard?!"
Though Louise and Avalon managed to ignore them, keeping their eyes on their food, Katie couldn't help but let her gaze snap up towards the voices. It was a group of first years from the table across from them, their voices now hushed whispers. They snuck glances every now and again, the looks on their faces obviously surprised and a little disgusted.
Katie rose from her seat, but Louise grabbed her hand.
"Just leave them be. It's fine, and it's easier to ignore them."
Katie stared at Louise for a few moments, before dismissing her comment entirely.
"Say, Louise, do you want to go shopping tomorrow?"
Louise couldn't help but jump in her seat at the volume of her voice. She practically shouted. The entire dining hall and its inhabitants that had increased during their conversation became silent as all eyes fell upon Louise, Avalon and Katie. Avalon chuckled. She started to panic, not wanting the attention.
"W-What? No, I," Louise began, sweating. But Katie didn't give up.
"Oh, come on, don't be like that! Think of it as a good bonding opportunity! We're friends after all!"
The entire room froze, but Katie kept smiling through it. Her eyes shined as if she expected Louise to say yes. She extended her hand. Louise stared at the extended limb, her face hot slightly, unsure of what to do.
It was easy to ignore, but sometimes, she would catch herself watching others. She would watch them exchange words and laughter, enjoying each others' company. She would hear the girls talk about the latest fashions and rumors, and the boys talk about the prettiest girls of the academy. But worst of all, she would see the couples, holding hands, kissing, hugging, and eating together. It made her sick. It made her angry. It made her sad, because she knew that she wouldn't have those things.
Louise reached out. Katie's smile widened as their hands came closer, but before their fingers could touch, Louise hesitated. Cold sweat trickled down the side of her face as she fell into a trance.
She knew she was being irrational, but she couldn't help herself. What if this was a trick? What if she was only going to pretend to be her friend? What if this was a ploy to humiliate her, give her a chance to prove to those gossiping bastards that she wasn't what they thought she was? What if this was a plot to make her feel sorry for her, and share her family's wealth and power with Katie's? What if—
A strong hand came down on Louise's back, knocking her forward and nearly out of her chair. "Ow! Who did that?!" Louise cried out reflexively, turning around. She froze when her eyes met with Kirche's, of all people. Tabitha stood behind her with a book in hand, as usual, but her eyes were not on its pages. They were on Kirche's back. Louise was about to retort, but the serious look on Kirche's face made her pause. Never before had Louise seen Kirche with an expression like this.
"I heard what happened with Guiche. You've impressed me, Valliere, so I'm only going to say this once. Stop being a loner and go with her. It'll do you some good to get out and stop cooping yourself up with Avalon in the forest all the time." A small, teasing grin spread across her lips. "Although, I can understand why you would want him for yourself. Your familiar is quite the dashing young man."
"W-w-w-what?!" Louise stuttered. She of all people is telling me to stop being a loner? I was practically a loner because of her! Before she could continue, Kirche cut her off.
"Look, I know we aren't friends; I don't like you, and you don't like me. But, just this once, please listen to me and go with her. If you let this go, you will regret it for the rest of your life." A sly smile spread across her face. "But if you really don't want to, you can say no, and we can go back to the way things were. Your shouting and my teasing you to get you out of that dull, depressed shell of yours."
Louise couldn't help but gape. That's why she teased her constantly? To get emotions out of her?! Louise felt furious, ready to shout, but Avalon's hand came on her shoulder, the grin on his face telling her that was exactly what Kirche was hoping for. Her words echoed in Louise's mind, and after a long while, she sighed, turning to Katie. Katie extended her retracted hand.
"Friends?" Katie said.
Louise felt herself smiling, the first true smile for days, slowly growing on her face. A heavy weight lifted itself off her shoulders as she took Katie's hand.
