Eren - (The next day)
Eren looked down at the two monstrous hands in front of him, wondering exactly what he was looking at. They weren't his hands though, at least he was certain of that much. There was a distinct lack of any sound, and he had no idea where he was or what he was doing. All that he was aware of at the moment was that he was seeing through someone else's eyes, and that he wasn't in control of this body. It was unsettling.
But whose body was he in?
Whomever it belonged to however, it was big. The size difference made more apparent when a few shinobi landed in front of him, spitting fire and lightning. The large body paid them no heed and stomped on them while he swatted a few more out of the air. Eren cringed a little at the sickening sounds their bodies made as they got squashed. Was he viewing this carnage from the eyes of a titan? Eren focused more on his surroundings, noting with interest that this titan's limbs were surrounded by an emerald fire. Upon closer inspection he discovered that it was hot enough to incinerate almost anything that got too close to his body while his own skin itself seemed to be made from a something similarly impenetrable.
Eren concluded that he was here as a mere spectator of some form or other and made up his mind to just roll with it, even if the lack of sound was unnerving. The absence of audio however, turned out to be a blessing as his titan surveyed the battlefield around him. Eren practically recoiled in horror at the scene.
They were at a mountain range he had never seen before, but for as far as he could see in all directions it was a battlefield of mind boggling proportions. There was intense fighting everywhere. The ground was soaked with blood and littered with the bodies of the fallen, and yet with every passing moment more and more casualties on every side began to add up. His stomach lurched and Eren was thankful he couldn't hear the screams that he knew would be permeating the atmosphere. This bloodbath and loss of life was something he was struggling to comprehend and to make matters worse, Eren didn't even know which side was which. The factions were indistinguishable and everyone just seemed to be fighting everyone else.
Were there even any sides? Did he have a side?
Shinobi and all sorts of titans scattered the landscape, everyone embroiled in a violent war beyond anything he could imagine. Titan against shinobi, titan against titan, and shinobi against shinobi. This was chaos, and everyone was doing their level best to rip everyone apart. This was simply a nightmare. What could even cause a battle of such a scale and what was everyone fighting for?
Eren's titan roared after his assessment of the battlefield then stomped on the ground, accomplishing two things. A deep chasm tore through the battlefield, swallowing hundreds of titan and shinobi alike indiscriminately. A moment later the second reason became obvious as everyone rushed away from his titan, which was now superheating the air and turning the ground around him to lava. Without any hesitation his titan began to pursue any survivors closest to him.
His titan was this powerful? And was this particular titan against everyone? Or was this just one massive free for all?
He was interrupted when the entirety of the battlefield froze momentarily at the explosion of energy on the other side of the battlefield. From what he could barely see two mountain sized susano of purple and red had been clashing, but they had been interrupted by a third that stood taller than both of them and was coloured orange. Surrounding the largest, orange ethereal avatar were four smaller avatars, two of which blasted both the other two susano apart as the orange one began barreling its way across the battlefield towards Eren.
His titan didn't seem to like that fact and released another roar. For some reason which Eren could not see, every single titan on the battlefield straightened, then as if a single unit they all charged to impede the orange susano, abandoning their prior battles.
Eren's jaw clenched, remembering the simulation where he had accidentally unlocked Mikasa and Armin's abilities. Was this actually his titan? So were all the titans on his side? If so why were they fighting each other and why had Eren only used this ability now if he had it all along? The thought that unnerved him the most however was still the fact that this titan could be him. Why was he even here?
Even for the power of the susano and its four avatars it still struggled against an entire army of titans, some of which even rivalled its great height. The pure numbers descending on it all at once was too much and it was forced into an impasse. His eyes widened however when some of the titans began casting what looked like spells as chains burnt out of the ground to further try and delay the orange avatar.
These titans had magic? What the hell? Eren was certain titans couldn't do that, and why were some of them wearing clothes?
His titan seemed satisfied with the result however and turned to run. At first Eren thought his titan might be retreating, but then he realized later that it wasn't quite running away, but heading somewhere with urgency.
A massive chunk of crystal rocketed down from the sky and crashed in front of him, halting his titan's run forcefully. His titan snarled and lowered its body into a ready stance, blinking only once at the girl that walked slowly out of the dirt cloud the impact had kicked into the air. Eren on the other hand was bewildered once again. There was no mistaking it. The woman that walked towards him was older than he was used to and she was no longer just a girl in her late teens, instead what stood in front of him was clearly a beautiful young woman.
What the hell had happened to Annie?
He was used to her showing very little emotion, and what little she showed was either when she was with Naruto or when she fought. But the expression on her face now was uncharacteristically soft that Eren had to double take. Was she pleading with the titan he was in? He couldn't read her lips and he couldn't hear anything which was frustrating. Whatever she wanted right now, she had to be desperate to be showing more emotion than he had ever seen from her. Eren had a bad feeling about this interaction however, as his titan was not relaxing.
He really wished he could read lips so that he could understand what she was asking of him. Unfortunately his titan shook his head and Eren's eyes widened when Annie's face hardened and she shifted into a titan in front of him. He vaguely remembered himself shifting into a titan and had snippets of his fight in Trost, but seeing it was something else. But if this was an older Annie in front of him, did that mean that this titan whose eyes he was looking out of was his titan? Was he older here as well? Why were he and Annie fighting then? Shouldn't they be on the same side?
Their battle was brutal. Annie's crystal looked to be a natural counter to his green fire and lava, his all consuming flame having little effect on the substance. Furthermore she could form it instantaneously anywhere on her body, negating any damage that his titan's formidable strength could dish out. To make matters even worse she was astonishingly proficient with controlling it like an extension of her body to summon weapons and all other assortments of things in the blink of an eye. And she had always been the better fighter, a few years couldn't change them that much.
The only reason he hadn't lost yet was that his regeneration was off the charts. He was already fighting defensively, but any injuries or loss of limbs was replaced almost immediately.
When the battle lulled for a moment, the older Annie took the opportunity to form a dome of crystal around them, trapping them in a cage with one another. Eren wondered why, since they were in a stalemate anyways. She couldn't deal any lasting damage to him and he couldn't hurt her.
She disposed of that notion quickly enough when she maneuvered him into a position where his titan was pinned onto the ground and all Annie had to do was punch a crystallized fist through his head. However Annie's titan hesitated. When she began to instead crystallize his prone titan into the ground Eren realized suddenly that she was only delaying him. Annie was working with whoever was inside the orange susano to obtain an objective, and Eren's titan was racing with them to something.
The crystal dome was suddenly blasted off from underneath, tipping it over and letting Eren free. Before Annie could respond and summon another dome she came under heavy fire from all sides as shinobi that had surrounded the dome began to unload everything they could at her in a never ending stream of jutsu. The older Annie was forced to bunker down and defend herself.
His titan shook off his half formed restraints and stood to watch Annie. She wasn't in danger, but she was going to be stuck there until the shinobi ran out of chakra. Why were they helping him though? A human landing on his shoulder caught his titans attention turned to look at whoever had jumped onto his soldier. Eren wondered who would be bold enough to do such a thing without fearing retribution. The long blond hair tied into a ponytail and beard threw him off at first, but after a moment, but when he finally recognized that the tall man in the commander's uniform was in fact his brother Armin, he couldn't help but gape. This meant two things. Firstly it confirmed that Armin was still on his side in this, which was good because Eren trusted his judgement. Secondly, it also meant that Armin was the one controlling the shinobi around him to attack Annie.
His siblings had really grown up into powerful beings then, even counting his own titan's boost. He could only imagine what Mikasa and Naruto were like right now if the weaker three of their family were all this strong.
His titan nodded at something Armin said and then turned to run as the bearded Armin leapt off his shoulder to stay behind to keep Annie pinned down.
It took a while of running even in his titan form, but when his titan finally arrived at its destination atop a mountain top Eren stifled a gasp of shock. At the very bottom of the mountain deep inside a crater, heavily chained and bound with golden restraints was Naruto. He was surrounded by what Eren discerned were probably ritual circles on the ground, written in a foreign language Eren couldn't understand. Holding the chains in a circle around him were titans, eyes closed in a focused trance as they chanted. Beneath Naruto a giant circle was starting to grow, and Eren guessed that this was what his titan wanted to stop. His titan wanted to save Naruto. But then why was Annie trying to stop him? If anything she should have gotten here before him.
His titan leapt down the gorge and Eren finally had confirmation that he was seeing out of an older version of himself as he exited the titans nape to stand in front of his bound brother.
Naruto's golden locks were dirtied and bloodied, and Eren got the feeling that his brother had been captive for a while. The titans in the circle around his brother either didn't notice him or couldn't stop their chant, and the brothers had the moment to themselves to converse. Once again Eren cursed the fact that he couldn't read lips as the conversation continued. His eyes blurred and he realized that his older self was crying while Naruto was trying to smile reassuringly despite his exhausted state. Eren's older self fell to his knees in despair until he looked up, probably at the urging of his brother. Their eyes met and their foreheads touched and this time Eren could see both of their resigned expressions.
Eren's older self then took a deep breath, then plunged his arm straight through Naruto's chest and ignited his green flames. Eren's heart stopped in horror.
At first nothing happened, but his whiskered brother smiled brightly at him one last time, seemingly at peace. After a minute of green fire in his chest Naruto finally screamed and what followed was a brilliant explosion that completely blinded him for a few moments. When his vision cleared his titan glanced around him, noting the missing mountain and the massive crater that took its place. The only thing left that remained in the charred crater was Eren's titan and Naruto's corpse, a body with a gaping hole in his chest.
Eren wanted to vomit, both versions of him unable to tear their eyes away from the sight. He had just killed his brother. What the fuck. No wonder Annie desperately wanted to stop him. Why the fuck was Armin even helping him to do this? Why was even Naruto okay with it? Was it to stop whatever ritual they were using him for? What was even worth more than his brother's life, for him and Armin to not only consider killing him, but to actually go through with it?
His older self finally managed to look away from the grotesque sight as an enormous shadow passed overhead and his older self held its breath as the orange susano landed heavily at the centre of the crater, its four avatars standing guard around it a moment later. The orange behemoth faded away into nothing as a much smaller figure in its forehead glided to the ground in her maneuver gear. She landed in front of him, ignoring Eren completely as she rushed to the body and slid to her knees beside Naruto. Eren felt whatever was left in his heart shatter at the look of complete despair and heartbreak on an older Mikasa's face as she cradled Naruto's body desperately, begging him to come back.
The silence amongst her choked sobs lasted only until the older Mikasa looked up and locked eyes with Eren. Slowly her face morphed from one of sadness into one of unrestrained hatred.
Eren had never been more afraid in his life, including the fall of Shiganshina. The sheer rage that emanated out of her blood red eyes alone was enough to burn him. She was going to kill him. His older self leapt out of the crater, possibly to run or try to get away. But what he saw when they exited the crater frightened him even more. The once brimming battlefield was almost devoid of any live combatants. As his older self looked around him, Eren slowly lost hope regarding any pleasant outcome. Creeping upwards over the entire battlefield towards the sky was something that could only be Annie's crystal, slowly forming a massive dome containing the entire battlefield. Nobody was walking away from here. Any survivors left, including him, were trapped with a powerful Mikasa who had just lost Naruto.
An explosion behind him sent him flying and Eren vaguely noticed his older self transform mid flight. He didn't care about the outcome anymore, still traumatized by everything else he had already witnessed. His titan caught movement in front of him as he tried to reorient himself and he spotted Annie's titan charging towards him menacingly. She wasn't just going to delay him this time. He idly wondered what had become of Armin if Annie was here, and if his little brother was still alive.
How did his family end up in this hell?
Eren didn't even much care for the ensuing battle as his future self fought for his life. Fighting against two of the people he cared about the most in the world was disturbing, but it was nothing compared to the murder of the man who had raised them all.
As his future self lay on its death bed, it finally seemed to realize it wasn't alone in its head. Eren was jolted out of his trance as he was addressed by his future self with its final words.
"He must die, Eren."
The last thing Eren saw before his older self's face was consumed by black flames were Mikasa's sharingan eyes, staring deep into his soul and filled with unforgiving hatred.
Eren - Sanctuary
Eren's eyes snapped open, only to see Mikasa's face hovering over his own.
Having just freshly woken up with the image of Mikasa's hateful face as he died, he didn't immediately register that the background was no longer a blood drenched battlefield. Or that it was his room. He also failed to notice that Mikasa had a concerned look on her face with a distinct lack of sharingan.
Instead his head shot forwards on instinct and collided into Mikasa's forehead with a sickening crack that sent her recoiling backwards in pain. He used the opportunity to throw the blanket off him and repositioned himself into a crouch and shot off the bed to launch himself at Mikasa before she could regain her bearings.
He forgot one thing in his haste however. She was a far better fighter than he was. Mikasa caught his fist mid air and used his momentum to throw him against the wall which he crashed into painfully. Before he could recover he felt Mikasa's boot on his chest as he was kicked through the wall into the next room. Still dizzy from having rolled across the floor he felt himself picked up by the neck and his back was slammed against the wall again. He got a glimpse of Mikasa's stoic face for naught but a second before her head rocketed against his and he saw stars, groggy beyond belief.
As he slowly came to senses he groaned as he realized what he had done. He had been inside his room, inside the sanctuary even and Mikasa had come to wake him up or check on him. Only for him to headbutt her and try to punch her. He definitely deserved her retaliatory head butt.
"Are you done? Or should I headbutt you again?" Mikasa asked coldly, glaring straight into his eyes.
He didn't think he could be as relieved as he was to see her pitch black eyes. There was no hatred present on her face either, just her usual calmness when Naruto wasn't around and Eren wasn't in danger. It was a far cry from what he had seen in his dream, and if he was being completely honest he would rather keep it that way.
"I'm good," Eren replied sheepishly as he noticed Mikasa was still holding him up against the wall with one hand. "And I'm sorry, by the way. So… can you let me down now?"
Mikasa narrowed her eyes and scrutinized his face for a moment. Satisfied with whatever she found Mikasa nodded once and dropped him onto the floor where he landed on his butt.
"Are you two done?" Armin asked from somewhere behind them. "Because Haku just woke me up and I've still got a headache."
Both Eren and Mikasa turned to see Armin sitting up in his bed, looking decidedly tired but still somewhat pleased at their interaction. Beside him Haku stood awkwardly, unsure if it was her place to say anything.
"Sorry Armin, it was my fault." Eren admitted with a sigh as he looked at the large hole in the wall that had divided his room from Armin's. "Isabel's gonna kill me."
Mikasa completely ignored Eren in that moment, as if she had conveniently forgotten the fact that she had been the one to kick Eren through the wall in the first place. Or, Eren supposed, maybe she just didn't care. He also was faintly amused by the fact that Armin and Haku were probably having similar thoughts but they all chose not to voice it.
"We were checking on you boys. If you were both healed enough and ready, then Naruto wanted us to meet. There are urgent matters to discuss." Mikasa said simply. "He's expecting us now."
Armin sighed as he threw his feet over the side of the bed to stand, "Well aside from my head I'm pretty well off. If I go grab a cup of coffee first I'll be all good in a bit."
Eren turned to face his siblings and nodded seriously. They did indeed have much to discuss, like what his powers were exactly. Now that he was more or less awake he vaguely remembered something from the day before, flashes of him being as tall as the surrounding buildings and fighting a berserk Naruto. He hadn't been in control back then. His only solace was that Annie was aware of whatever was wrong with him and she would have to tell him now since the secret was out. He knew that he could transform into a titan, but aside from that he drew a blank.
But that wasn't what really worried him about the day before. The entire time he had been transformed, there had been a beautiful voice in his ear. It had been whispering seductively to him, slowly trying to gain his permission, to let it in. But even in his confused titan state Eren would never let anyone into his head except Armin. No one would take away his freedom. He didn't know what that whisper was all about, but he had a bad feeling about it.
To make matters worse he couldn't shake off the feeling that the nightmare he had just woken up from was a warning of some sort. If it was all real, what did it mean for him and his family? Who was it that his older self said had to die? He couldn't seriously mean it had to be Naruto did he?
Jean - Chlorba District
Jean waited patiently near the book store, expecting Levi and that crazy red haired bitch to appear any moment now so that they could venture to the Underworld. Who would have thought such a massive territory existed underneath the walls.
What a crazy world he lived in. To think just the day before his biggest issue was whether to join the scouts or the military police. And now he found himself doubting the very existence he lived in, caught in a web of mystery with him smack in the centre. It was difficult to accept that all of this had been happening all around him, probably influencing his life since the very day he had been born. How many times had their memories been wiped before Eren had accidentally given him his immunity to mind control?
Now that he had seen a glimpse of true freedom, even someone like him wanted to dream about the outside world. He could see why Armin and Eren were so adamant that being trapped like sheep was a life they were unwilling to live when there was just so much out there. It wasn't quite the life of safety he had dreamed of, but it definitely did seem worth it in the end.
But on an equal note it was also a frustrating realization the more he thought about it. With what Naruto told him, Eren wasn't wrong when he called them useless sheep. They were being herded for whatever reason and only he and Captain Levi were in a position to unravel this mystery and discover just how deep the treachery lay. Eren was right, dammit. They weren't free. And to think he had been happy enough to sit on his ass in the interior and live a carefree life.
"Dammit," he said silently to himself under his breath. While waiting for the captain and the red haired girl to return he had nothing else to do aside from think, and he wasn't enjoying his self reflection at all as he looked back at who he used to be.
Well that would change, starting now. He had different purpose, a meaningful one. He was going into the Military Police, and he was going to work his ass off to get somewhere high enough where he might find something. Even if he never found out who exactly was keeping them like lab rats, he could at least find out if the upper echelons of this farce of a government knew what was going on. He could plan for what to do after that. Levi would be there to help him with what he could, but Jean knew that as a distinct and well known member of the scouts there wasn't much that Levi could really do within the Interior of Sina. Everyone would be suspicious of him and the bad blood between the Scouts and the Military Police was well known. The Interior also had to be well defended if even Naruto had been trying to unsuccessfully infiltrate them for a few years.
This was something only he could do.
The weight of responsibility was sobering, but also a burden he would have to shoulder. For once in his life Jean realized that he could not be selfish in this matter. His thoughts flew to the few friends he had, the smiles on their faces. Marco's smile as he thought about serving the king, Reiner and Bertholdt's smiles as they dreamt of retaking Wall Maria and heading to their hometown, Sasha and Connie's general antics. Then his thoughts drifted even further to his mother and father who worked diligently in their business to provide him and his sister with a comfortable life. And his sister. Jean steeled his resolve as he gazed bitterly at the walls of Chlorba district, feeling trapped. His little sister should not ever have to fear titans. Not if he could help it.
Naruto, Mikasa, Armin, and Eren would be fine outside the walls. But unlike them the rest of the people he knew were all doomed to remain here unless something changed. If change did happen however, then perhaps in the distant future he would explore the world with his sister. If the world inside and outside the walls were safe.
In a way Jean also felt empowered by the goal he had set for himself. Was this what it was like to finally have a purpose?
"Oi brat," a deep voice whispered as a hooded figure past by his table slowly. "Follow me."
Jean pretended he hadn't heard anything as he downed what was left of his cold tea and left a coin on the table as he stood to follow the figure that disappeared behind an alley.
"Took you fucking long enough, we have to hurry! Her coughing fucking worsened and I know what the fuck else to do!" Tayuya hissed in worry as she tended to a person leaning against the wall.
"Let's not waste time arguing then," Levi snapped irritably and picked up the other person surprisingly gently. "Brat follow me, the girl will make sure no one's following."
"Move your asses already!" Tayuya snapped. "I don't fucking sense anyone following us alright? If she fucking dies on us because your slow asses couldn't keep up I'm going to fucking murder you! You hear me?"
Jean wisely kept his mouth shut and decided that Tayuya was stressed out enough as it was, and while he was immune to her illusions the same could not be said for the ogres she could summon.
In their haste, none of them noticed the white haired man slowly walk towards the spot they had been in and push up his glasses curiously. "How naïve of Tayuya-chan to be so dependent on her powers." He observed as a much taller and lithe man walked up next to him. "And how disappointingly predictable she behaves when Kin is in danger. Although I am unaware of the identity of their other companion."
"It is not the power or ability itself one should be afraid of, it is how well one uses what they have at their disposal. After all, we Ackerman don't have chakra do we? And yet I accompany you to take down these shinobi for Orochimaru-sama." The tall man chuckled as he took a puff on his cigarette. "I wonder what my nephew is up to with that gatekeeper."
The white haired man looked up, having to crane his head considerably to meet the gaze of the much taller man in the suit and bowler hat. "Not all of you Ackerman are quite so chakraless, Kenny-kun. After all, Jirobo-kun reported that a cadet Ackerman in the 104th has unlocked her sharingan."
Kenny's eyebrows rose in interest as a ghost of a smile flickered on his face. "Oh? How interesting."
Mikasa - Sanctuary
Mikasa looked around her and made herself comfortable at the round dining table in the room they had designated as the meeting place. As usual she had just ensured her seat next to Naruto and calmly watched as Armin apologetically shut the door to leave Haku outside. This meeting would deal with the immediate family first and although Haku had proven where she stood it didn't mean that she had any bearing on the decision making that would be taking place after they gathered all of their facts.
Annie was here too, even if not physically. She was still slowly healing from the kyubi's chakra that she had been exposed to the previous day and it was expected to take around a week still. Armin would conduct this meeting in their minds, where there was less chance of a leak and a greater ability to share the relevant information. The added benefit was that even as Annie's body healed, her presence was still there.
"For the sake of time, clarity and lack of confusion may I suggest something?" Armin asked around with a look, still waiting for an answer.
"Just ask it. It's just us Armin, no need to be so damn polite." Eren chuckled.
Mikasa rolled her eyes at his response but nodded at Armin to continue.
"Sorry," Armin apologized sheepishly and scratched the back of his head, a habit which Mikasa observed the smaller blond had picked up from Naruto. "Anyways I was going to suggest that since everyone has something to share with all of our different experiences yesterday, viewing them all at once without order is going to be a confusing mess. So my suggestion in light of that fact is for everyone here to gather the information and memories that you wish to share, then pass them on to me. I'm going to group and arrange everything. After that we can all view the finished version together, but silently. We don't need any interruptions as we watch and we can deal with any reactions afterwards. Is that good, okay, decent?"
"Is that alright with you Annie?" Naruto asked gently. "You don't have to tell us everything you've been hiding, but it would really help us at the moment."
"Don't worry papa. I know you didn't bother me on the subject before, but anytime before yesterday, almost none of the information would be relevant. I'll share them to Armin." Annie replied calmly before the tone in her voice turned into a warning as she addressed someone else.
"Don't act like a child with everything I reveal Eren."
Naturally the boy in question bristled at the implied insult and scowled at her while Mikasa and Armin just sighed.
"You just proved her point you idiot," Naruto laughed as if he was frustratingly amused.
"Fine. Get on with it." Eren grumbled halfheartedly and crossed his arms to sulk.
"Who goes first?" Mikasa asked.
"Ladies first. You, then Annie. After that it's Eren and I'll leave Naruto for last." Armin replied. "Now remember, when we watch all of this together, nobody will be able to speak or comment. We will see it from that person's point of view as if we lived it."
Mikasa nodded as she began to clear her mind, thinking back to that first moment in Trost when she finally regrouped with Eren and Armin.
Armin - Sanctuary
Armin was startled out of their mental sharing session by a loud crash. Slightly disoriented from having disengaged from the mental plane he raised a hand to his throbbing head and watched as Eren stormed out, presumably to go vent somewhere. Then again it may also be because he was going to try and kill Berhtoldt and Reiner. Armin sighed as he struggled to stand, another lance of pain shooting through his skull as he grunted in pain and he shut his eyes and fell back down onto the chair.
"Eren!" Mikasa called out behind him as she rose and followed him.
Armin debated trying to run after them as well when he noticed that Naruto raised a hand to stop him. He opened his mouth to protest when he noticed that Naruto looked just as tired as he was, if not more.
"Leave them, Mikasa can handle Eren when he gets pissed. They should be able to sort this out between them. We can ask them about stuff later." He said.
Armin nodded in understanding, being mindful as well that Naruto wasn't in the mood to deal with another of Eren's tantrums either. "All those clones yesterday hit you with too much information all at once didn't they?" Armin observed before he caught sight of his coffee mug and reached for it gratefully. Even if it was already cold the caffeine in it still packed a punch and offered some relief.
"They did. In fact if I had been any other shinobi, using that many shadow clones for that extent of time may have fried my brain. That isn't the only thing unfortunately." Naruto groaned as he ran a hand through his golden hair.
"I've got millennia of memories that aren't mine, and sorting through them is a nightmare. It gets worse in my sleep because I have no control over what I'm thinking about, and that stuff is not healthy. I've spent most of this morning meditating by the way, trying to start from the very beginning and work my way up. It's very tiresome and slow going though. There's just too much substance." Naruto explained tiredly as he leaned back dangerously on his chair.
Armin pursed his lips slightly, wondering for a moment that rocking the chair like his brother was doing wasn't a good idea. He definitely wouldn't be doing that if Mikasa was here.
"Going through all of this is going to take much more than a few years, which is kinda crappy if you think about it. Can't really look forward to a good night's rest in a while." Naruto continued.
Armin inhaled the scent of coffee for a moment as he listened to issue before he looked up again. "I don't know if I can help you in absorbing the memories, but I at least believe I can help you sleep better."
Naruto gave him an exhausted but slightly hopeful smile and relaxed with his hands behind his head. "That would be much appreciated. I can integrate the memories in my own time, but sleep is still something I still seem to need."
The pair relaxed for a moment in the near silence when a quiet voice interrupted them.
"I told him not to act like a child." Annie muttered almost petulantly with a sigh.
"Oh you're still in the link?" Naruto asked with yawn.
"There wasn't a clear time to leave," Annie pointed out.
"How's your healing going?" Armin asked curiously as he wondered how tired he was to not have noticed Annie was still connected to them. "You got burned pretty badly, and they weren't… normal burns either."
"It's not as bad as we thought. I'll be out of here in a few days, though I'll be spending most of it asleep." She said.
"It's fine Annie, we're all rather sleepy at the moment. Go get some rest, you're gonna need it when you start helping Eren with his titan form next week." Naruto joked.
"I'm not looking forward to it," Annie replied. "He's still going to be angry about Reiner and Bertholdt. It's going to be hard, making him listen."
"That's true," Armin agreed with a yawn. "I myself don't know how to feel about them to be honest. Naruto? They're more your friends than ours. If anything I thought you'd be as angry as Eren is."
The golden haired boy sighed heavily in frustration. "I'm angry, I won't lie. But in a way I want to understand them as well. I mean I know why they broke into Shiganshina, and I can't hate them for being desperate. You three were just kids right Annie? Foreign land, exhausted, being chased my mindless hordes? Then you reach the walls with no way up or around them. I can see that and understand that. Even Reiner's desire to see how the king of the walls would react if they broke the inner gate makes sense. You couldn't have known the wall would have actually fallen."
"And you kind of forgave Sasuke as well. Considering Bertholdt and Reiner were actually your friends, I can see why you'd be willing to give them a chance." Armin pointed out as he took a sip of coffee. It was a petty retort, but Armin was surprised he had actually voiced it.
Two cerulean eyes opened slowly and met Armin's light blue. "I take it you don't approve?"
"I would have preferred it if we didn't have to worry about him at all. You went through a lot of effort to keep him alive when you could have saved us all the headache of ever dealing with him again. It's a liability, and letting Sasuke go may come back to bite us later on." Armin answered truthfully, seeing no reason to hide his thoughts.
"I know that. But I couldn't help it," Naruto chuckled tiredly.
Armin features softened and he gave his brother a small smile. "You're idealistic Naruto, with a big heart. And you can see the good in people, which is something not everyone can do. This saving people thing of yours is admirable. Annoying for me, but still admirable. We need you for that, but not everyone is worth saving, and not everything can be forgiven or ignored. That's what I'm here for. I can't make you stop being who you are, but I'll be damned if I don't minimize your losses. I'm not a fan of what I do, but I can tell when something is necessary and do what has to be done. But sometimes there are moments when what must be done isn't what is right, and that's where you step in. We balance each other out, and I'll always be right here."
It was one of the things he genuinely admired about his whiskered brother after all. He was a unique person, something that he had to protect. Naruto wouldn't think twice about helping others most of the time and because of that Armin had made it his own job to make sure his brother stayed safe. It was the least he could do to repay him.
"Thanks little bro," Naruto said as he returned the smile.
Armin was relieved when he noticed some of the tension that had been plaguing the whiskered boy's face bleed away after his reassuring words.
"As for Reiner and Bert, I'm conflicted Armin." Naruto continued. "I mean like I said I understand Shiganshina, but what I don't understand is Trost. They saw how useless attacking Shiganshina was. They saw it yielded nothing except a huge loss of life. What were they thinking doing it a second time, and leaving Annie completely out of the loop? Shiganshina was an accident, and I blame Grisha for sending a bunch of kids without adequate warning of the dangers. But what they did in Trost… that was a direct betrayal. They turned their backs on their friends, on us. Even if Tayuya wiped everyone's memories of Trost, there were still casualties. People who died and won't even be remembered. I mean why would Reiner do this? He's practically everyone's big brother. Unless he was just that good at manipulating everyone. If the wall fell, can you just imagine how much more life would have been lost? There was no way they didn't know that."
"You want to forgive them, but even you are struggling aren't you?" Armin asked. He was well aware after all that outside the family Reiner and Bertholdt were some of Naruto's actual close friends.
"I can speak with them papa," Annie volunteered. "If their memories were really wiped, then they might still be planning to do it again and attack Trost soon. Especially if they are reassured that the 'evacuation drill' yesterday means there will be less casualties."
Armin blinked. That was actually a very well made observation that he hadn't considered yet. Sometimes he forgot that Annie herself was also intelligent, enough that she had been spying behind enemy lines without backup and without getting caught.
"No." Naruto answered immediately. "You're still healing and that's dangerous."
"She has a point though," Armin said.
"Armin," Naruto said warningly.
"They're afraid of me papa, with good reason. They are no threat to me and they know it." Annie reassured him.
Armin paused as a warm feeling that wasn't his seeped into the link and he registered that Annie was touched that Naruto was more concerned about her wellbeing than their plans.
"And what do we do if that conversation goes well?" Armin asked.
"We offer to take them with us. They have no reason to be here any longer unless they genuinely want to spend their time searching for whatever Grisha was looking for." Naruto answered. "If they stay though I won't argue as long as they don't plan on knocking down any more walls."
"And if it doesn't?"
Naruto's eyes hardened. "Then we can leave them to attack the wall. I have the feeling with the way he reacted yesterday that Orochimaru won't tolerate another attack. He might either have the Gatekeepers kill them or send one of his Hands."
That was strangely harsh, but at least they wouldn't be getting their hands dirty.
"But you will only speak with them after we are sure you are fully healed? Understood Annie?" Naruto continued unabated with the fatherly tone he took when he was making it clear he wasn't to be disobeyed.
"Yes papa," Annie's amused voice echoed in their heads.
"Good, now go get some rest shorty." Naruto said as he reverted to a more friendly demeanor.
"See you after my nap," Annie replied as she left the connection.
"Did… she try to make a joke?" Armin said unsurely but with a fond smile.
"She's getting there," Naruto responded and placed both his feet onto the table while Mikasa wasn't around. Armin pursed his lips again. "But on a more serious note Armin, you've got most of the information we know. I want your honest opinion on the situation. What should we do now? I can't promise we'll follow it exactly but I will listen to it and factor it in."
Armin was far from insulted, well used to Naruto not always following the recommended plan. In fact he preferred it that way. Everyone had their own way of doing things and he trusted Naruto's decision making. He was well aware of what Naruto's top priority was anyways.
"I'm not fully certain," Armin admitted. "But from what we currently know, I would suggest heading to Paradis Valley. It's the only other place outside the walls which we know most about, and we can worry a little less about any backstabbing. And if what we can see is right, should anything go wrong we could always just run. They are unwilling to leave their haven and won't risk chasing us, if they are even willing to transform."
"And the villages?" Naruto probed.
"It depends on what they offer us, which I already doubt. They want you for something Naruto, as a weapon of sorts. They won't just let you go. And think about it, these five hidden villages have been fighting almost constantly. War after war, do you think any one of them would be willing to give up custody of you to each other? The way I see it, if we ever have anything to do in those villages we will be even worse off than we are here. At least here we have the option of sitting down and doing nothing. With them you will be forced to fight their battles. And if they see Eren, Annie, Mikasa, and I as valid hostages to control you, don't you think they would?"
"You really don't like them do you?" Naruto asked.
"If I will be honest. No." Armin replied honestly. "They had the freedom to enjoy the outside world. They had the freedom to explore the world's wonders and discover new things without fear. They had the power to ensure their safety in peace. And yet they chose to bathe the ground in blood. Such senseless loss of life over reputation. What were their clan wars and village wars for? Is it a matter of pride or just because they can? Meanwhile we are stuck in here as they squander the freedom that we can only dream of?"
"That's fair. So I take it with the way you're viewing Annie's village, you don't think we will settle there?" Naruto asked as he placed his feet back onto the floor and rested his cheek on his hand to show he was listening.
"No. I can bet it will be an amazing experience, travelling there and living there for a while to experience a different culture. But before we choose someplace, somewhere to settle down, let's tire ourselves enough that exploring is no longer as exciting. Then we can look back and choose from all of the places we have been." Armin said.
"I like the sound of that. Do you think there a chance our final destination might be here? Back within these walls?" Naruto asked.
Armin paused for a moment, not dismissing it outright.
"It's possible. I can picture us being comfortable living here after our travels, but if and only if the current threat to us within it is resolved. I can just imagine us living in a retaken Shiganshina, but without the mindless titans and no crazy immortal. If that does happen while we are away, then I don't mind settling here after our adventures."
"Unfortunately that crazy madman does seem to be a rather big, long term issue. I don't think it's one we can deal with anytime soon." Naruto sighed. "But a more pressing matter though. Will you be willing to check up on Kin? They're going to be at Burke's Hovel sometime later today."
"I will, but I will stand firm on something." Armin said as he held up a hand to stall whatever else Naruto had been about to say. He already knew where this was going.
"They will not be entering the Sanctuary. At least not until we are certain they haven't been followed or aren't somehow being tracked. We created this place over years to be something that was only spoken about, but separate from the world. Nobody can find this place unless we let them. For all intents and purposes this place does not exist. You haven't seen her in years Naruto. Things can change in that time and she could be playing you and your kindness to find out where you've been. If Orochimaru finds this place it's over for us, and it's over for all the people who you saved. These are our people Naruto. We created this haven to give them a second chance at life. It's our responsibility to let them enjoy their lives here that they never otherwise got to live."
Armin paused to wet his lips and took another sip of coffee. "Look at this place Naruto. We made a small village underground that can sustain itself. They have animals, they have farms, and they get sunlight and rain, even if it's artificial. They are finally at peace, with nothing to ever fear. They can do this because every single person in here has been screened and every single one of them is living their dream life. This is what is at risk, no matter how you feel for this Tayuya. Is she worth losing all this?"
Naruto closed his eyes again sighed while Armin gave him a moment for the words to sink in. He knew decisions like this were always hard for someone with so much empathy for others who weren't harming him. Armin needed it from Naruto however, as it was a constant reminder of what is was to feel human. Sometimes he found himself disturbed that he could turn off his own empathy and look at everything objectively. If he didn't have Naruto as a walking example of what it was like to be a compassionate human, he could see himself easily becoming a monster who held no value to life other than it simply being there as a matter of existence or a resource to abuse.
"But can we at least do something then? It feels wrong to just turn them away," Naruto argued.
Armin closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. He didn't want to let any of them in here in the first place, even with a thorough screening. Levi and Jean were immune to having their memories erased and Armin had enough reason to believe they would be immune to him as well. As much as possible he would rather that nobody ever knew where the entrance to the Sanctuary was, much less how to get in. In fact, the only ones aware of the entrance were Naruto, himself, Mikasa, Farlan and Isabel as Naruto's most trusted. Eren and Annie preferred not to know and the other residents had all asked for the knowledge to remain hidden from them. They explained that there was no reason for them to have that knowledge since none of them planned to leave or let anyone in.
At least Naruto could see the sense of not letting strangers in, even if two of them happened to be Jean and Captain Levi of all people.
But now that his brother had conceded Armin felt it right to concede something as well, even if to just get rid of some of the stress bothering his brother.
"Fine. You and I can head to Burke's Hovel. We can remain hidden and search around them for any pursuers. We will deal with them first if we find any, then we check what's wrong with this Kin. I'll bring some of the medicine I developed and check if the first dose has any effect. Then I can leave them with her and she should be cured within the month." Armin finally replied.
"Any chance they'll be let in here?" Naruto asked hopefully.
"We will see," Armin answered reluctantly. "I'll give them a thorough screening first. But anyways, before we head out there to deal with it let's go get some brunch. I'm starving."
Hopefully he could just remove the line of conversation as soon as possible.
"Now that I can get behind," Naruto laughed and pushed back the chair and rushed towards the door. "All this thinking has made me hungry! And I haven't had ramen since yesterday!"
Armin smiled fondly and followed after his suddenly more boisterous sibling at a more sedate pace. He could use some more coffee as well after all. He paused however when he remembered something that should have been important. Ymir and Christa, or Historia, were both also sealed within Naruto's wrist tattoo. And from the memories he had reviewed he didn't recall them being let out as of yet. Did Naruto forget about them or was he keeping them in his wrist for a similar reason that they hadn't been thoroughly screened yet?
Oh well they were in there for a day and they wouldn't notice the passage of time anyways since they would be asleep. They could wait until after lunch, then maybe he could get a better idea of the power structure within these walls that Christa was somehow a very important part of. He definitely needed some more coffee though, there was a still a long day ahead.
Eren - Sanctuary
"Eren Wait!"
Eren barely registered the voice calling after him as he stormed away from the meeting room. He didn't know where he was going, but all he could feel was a burning desire to hit something. Something needed to break and it needed to break now. Even the fact that he didn't know where the entrance to the sanctuary was didn't deter him.
"Eren where are you going?!"
Everything was shrouded in a dull haze. The only constant sensation he could register was that every muscle in his body was tightly coiled and ready for an explosion. He wasn't even sure what exactly the source of his anger was directed at, and yet the lack of focus was only further igniting his rage. Bertholdt and Reiner's betrayal, Naruto letting Sasuke go, the fact that they were being kept like lab rats, the fact that his father had been alive this whole time in the outside world and had left him in these walls, or even the fact that while he was stuck here and dreaming of being free there were civilizations out there. Eren had never before felt as trapped and useless as he did now.
But this was different. Now he had powers. He was a freaking shifter of the highest pedigree. His bloodline was a royal one! He could do something about this. He could lash out at this situation. He could-
"Eren I said wait!" The voice ordered as a hand clamped onto his shoulder to halt his movement.
Eren snarled as he suddenly grabbed the offending wrist and pushed his body backwards in preparation to slam whoever put their hand on him onto the ground in front of him. Unfortunately whoever it was reacted well and somehow landed on their feet, something which angered him further. Without really thinking he raised his hand to his mouth, confident this issue would be resolved very very soon.
His world shook a moment later with his ears ringing from a resounding slap. When his vision cleared he was greeted by the sight of a furious Mikasa, something he didn't find directed at him very often. It was jarring enough that it momentarily halted his train of thought.
"You're unreasonable enough you want to transform here." Mikasa asked acidly.
Eren didn't comprehend at first what she said, instead focusing on the fact that the slap he had received had really stung. Compounded with the furious expression on the woman's face Eren responded and met fire with fire.
The ensuing clash did not last very long.
It ended with Eren pinned down. And he would have still struggled, even with the intense pain of having his limbs practically useless and Mikasa kneeling on his chest, if her eyes hadn't turned a blood red to intensify her glare. Normally it would have only caused him to pause, but the vision from his dream overlaid the image he was seeing and he was frozen still.
"You're angry, Eren. I understand that. I'm used to that. But are you that angry that you would destroy what we created here for no reason?"
What was she- oh. OH. They were in the sanctuary. A place they had worked so hard to ensure was the safest place one could think of. It was a small self sustaining village where the villagers no longer had any reason to fear for their lives. Where there was no shadow of thieves, killers, crimes in general. A place where they did not need to fear the nobles who would exploit them, or the corrupt military. And least of all, they need not fear titans.
And he had just been blindly about to transform for a fight in the heart of the village. A village Armin and Naruto had fought with blood, sweat, and tears to craft into existence. He could understand why Mikasa would be mad. Heck he would be mad at himself. It was like a bucket of ice cold water had been dumped onto himself. He could have accidentally killed someone, and he definitely would have needlessly traumatized innocent people who had just finally begun to live their peaceful lives.
"You see now what the consequences of your actions would have been?" Mikasa asked seriously, thankfully shutting off her eyes. "Now, you will explain why you are angry. You will tell me how you feel, and you will do it now."
"I don't want to," Eren replied stubbornly. He had never been good at discussing his feelings and he wasn't about to get into this type of awkward conversation with Mikasa, not when he could easily avoid it like he had been doing all these years. Unfortunately this time simply shouting at her and telling her to go away wasn't quite working as well as it used to. Something had changed.
"You will. Time and time again I let you vent and say whatever it is you want, Eren. But it did not work. It never did and because of that you aren't growing. You've gotten better at fighting, but you still act like the hotheaded child that you were in Shiganshina. You will speak about how you feel, just as I have because you aren't going anywhere. And maybe, just maybe you will realize what a childish brat you are." Mikasa ordered.
Considering that he really couldn't move anything aside from his neck and Mikasa was pinning him down with her weight, there really wasn't much he could do. And if there was one thing he hated it was feeling trapped. But in this situation he couldn't do anything about it and so his anger returned and he channeled it through its only remaining outlet, his mouth.
"Fine you want to know!? What was that piece of shit meeting we just had!? Aren't you mad as well? Sasuke is out there kissing some snake bastard's ass when he tried to kill me! And now we're forbidden from returning the favour? What the fuck Mikasa! Nobody should be able to get away with shit like that. And it was Naruto who let him go! It's almost like he didn't care that I almost died!"
"You're accusing Naruto of not caring?" Mikasa asked with a disbelieving eyebrow.
"Oh yeah of course you'd defend him," Eren scoffed and rolled his eyes.
Mikasa's eyes narrowed. "Did you even listen to the conversation? He can't touch us either. And you say Naruto of all people does not care? Look around you Eren. This sanctuary is here only because Naruto cares. He didn't ignore people in need. Do you think he would have gone through all of this trouble to build this place if he didn't care about these people he hardly knew? And if he cares this much for strangers how much do you think he is willing to do for us? You are the one who doesn't care. You see what you want to see and ignore everything else. We are lucky to have someone who cares for us as much as he does, can't you see that? He wants to keep us safe, and he could have done that by keeping us inside this sanctuary forever. I'm fine with that. Annie is fine with that. But you and Armin want to be free and head outside the walls, and is he stopping you? He's been preparing us all these years for a dream of yours that goes against his own wishes and this selfishness is how you repay him? Did you even realize that? He has so many other problems to be thinking about right now, but you don't care if you add to that burden do you? When did he ever ask for anything in return? And here you turn on him after a decision he made that you don't like?"
Eren hated to admit it, but even he couldn't deny the guilt that bubbled up in his stomach like acid at her words. He wanted to say something to refute her words badly, but he couldn't come up with anything solid. Deep down he knew those things, but with how much Naruto smiled and brushed these matters aside it was easy for Eren to think that Naruto was always fine and happy. Of course if there would be anyone who Naruto would allow to see his feelings, it would be Mikasa.
"You're right. I'm sorry." Eren finally admitted. Even now, he had trouble properly empathizing with people and realizing that they had their own world that existed out of his own. Naruto was the opposite, he empathized too much even when the situation did not call for it. It had been so easy to just expect Naruto to always run everything, to always have the answers. Eren had no right to be judging his brother's decision. What he wanted meant asking Naruto to turn his back on who he was.
"I'm not the one you're supposed to apologize to," Mikasa said coldly as she reminded him of whom exactly he owed that apology to. "Now, Eren, what else is bothering you? If it was just Naruto you would have yelled at him back there instead of coming out here like a child."
Eren's pensive face morphed back into a scowl. "Reiner and Bertholdt! They betrayed us. They broke the wall and they killed my mother, and countless other innocents!"
He didn't care how she defended those two as he prepared to rant at the injustice. What they had done was unforgiveable in his eyes.
"Annie was there too," Mikasa pointed out. "Are you mad at her as well?"
And that there was a splash of cold logic. He couldn't be mad at those two and leave Annie out of it either. It was one or the other.
"She didn't do anything!" He protested.
"And how is that any different? We both know now that Annie could have stopped them both if she wanted to. In fact if Annie had actually fought back and guarded them, then they wouldn't have gotten desperate enough to break down the gates." Mikasa said.
"And Trost?" Eren growled. "They were our friends! Comrades! And they still attacked us again! They lied to our faces and tried to annihilate us! They need to pay!"
"And so you will kill them?" Mikasa asked simply, her face once again devoid of emotion.
Eren was getting more and more frustrated as the argument went on. Mikasa was not responding to his accusation as he expected and he was being forced to think even harder about something entirely different as she changed the course of the conversation. He wanted this to be about those two traitors, for her to try and defend them. And yet they were discussing him and his character, and Eren hated it.
"If I have to!" he yelled back.
"If you start by looking at revenge that way, you can start by digging two graves Eren. One for your target and one for you. This is not healthy." Mikasa reprimanded calmly.
"If someone hurt anyone of us you'd seek revenge as well Mikasa," Eren accused, annoyed at the blatant hypocrisy.
"I do not deny that," Mikasa said honestly. "And yet there is wisdom in these words. Whether I follow them or not is not the issue, it is what you are going to do, Eren. Uchiha Sasuke is an example of what you will become. He has done all these monstrous things and yet he has not achieved his goal. Just because you can transform into a titan now does not mean anything. No matter how strong you become, there will always be someone stronger."
Well, when put like that even he had to grudgingly admit she had a point. There were many stronger than him. Shinobi and titan alike, he was at a disadvantage because he couldn't even control his own titan. Now that he thought about it, what was he even going to do against Bertholdt exactly?
"Anything else Eren?" Mikasa probed after a moment of silence from both of them.
"No," Eren replied quickly. He just wanted this whole thing to be over with, his anger had already burnt out and he was already feeling both incredibly awkward and uncomfortable. Mikasa was also pretty heavy.
"Your father then," Mikasa said. "You are angry because of him."
Why could she see through him so well? It was hard enough to remain angry when someone was dissecting your reasons and countering them, harder still when they were forcing you to be vulnerable with what you felt. He looked back up and noticed that Mikasa was simply looking at him and waiting patiently for an answer.
"Yes!" he finally shouted. "What the fuck is wrong with him? What the fuck was he even thinking? Let me have a child behind enemy lines and leave him there? What was I, an accident he had with my mother? He was married Mikasa! I have an older half brother back there OUTSIDE the walls! Then he sent kids to take his place and look what happened! He abandoned us! He tossed us away as if we didn't matter! Did he even care about mom? About me?"
"And yet because of him you were born into this world. Because of him, I met you. Because of him, we have this family now. If we do meet him and you still wish to fight him, I will not stop you. But being angry about that now solves nothing, Eren. Save it for when you do see him again." Mikasa said with a small smile that made Eren relax as he found both her words and he her reaction reassuring. Was this what it would have felt like if he had responded more positively to her motherly attitude before? It was… nice. Well maybe he could do without her kneeling on his chest.
"That's not all that's bothering you Eren," She added.
Eren's eye twitched. "What else do you want me to say? That I'm pissed we're fucking lab rats and actual sheep in a cage? That I'm pissed that we could have been free if not for some snake weirdo?"
"You feel useless, don't you?" Mikasa asked calmly, her voice not rising to match Eren's.
Meanwhile he felt his heart stop and lodge itself in his throat. What a way to hit the nail on the head.
"Can you blame me?" Eren sighed as he decided the quickest way to end this session was for him to be completely honest with her. "Naruto is this brilliant person that so many people look up to and rely on. He's powerful, a demon lord, the subject of a prophecy, a freaking awesome shinobi too. Armin's super smart and his mind techniques just keep improving. You're inhuman, and we don't even know your limits. And Annie is crazy strong too. Running around in a group like this, what am I supposed to feel? Sure now I can turn into a titan, but I lose control. Whatever I did to unlock your abilities, I can't even control either. So what's the point of me having these powers? What's the point of me even being in this family?"
"So you do feel inadequate," Mikasa said with a sigh of her own as she finally looked away from Eren and looked upwards at their artificial sky. "I understand now."
"How would you know?" Eren asked tiredly. "You've got so much going for you."
"Because I feel the same," Mikasa replied as she got off his chest and sat down next to him then stared down at her hands.
Eren was relieved that he was no longer pinned down and slowly but painfully sat up next to his black haired sister, his interest piqued. Mikasa of all people felt inadequate? That sounded like the punch line to a bad joke.
"But for different reasons." Mikasa continued. "You're right. I'm strong. Stronger than any person has any right to be. And yet I feel inadequate, because despite all this power I fear I still can't protect the people closest to me. Why did I not have this when my parents died? Why did you almost have to die before I fought back that day? Why couldn't I lift the beam that trapped Carla? I have so much power and yet maybe one day it won't be enough. That someday soon I will again lose one of the few people I care about because I wasn't strong enough. The only thing I desire in this world is the safety and happiness of my precious people. But you. You make it so hard for me Eren. Do you not see that I do not want to lose anyone else? I can't picture a world without my family in it and yet that almost became my reality yesterday. I know how you feel, because every day I feel like I won't be strong enough. I don't care about making a difference like you do. I just want you all safe."
Eren did not know what to say. He was far too used to shouting at Mikasa, and as a consequence he had never really known how she felt. He knew she cared for him, but hearing this from her definitely put things in a new light.
"I don't know what else to do for you Eren," she continued as she still refused to look at him. "I never had siblings, so I do not know how to care for you in a way I don't annoy you. I can't treat you the way my parents did, they were far too soft spoken for you. I can't treat you like Carla did either, you just shout back about wanting to be free. It's why I love spending time with Naruto, because I can be myself without waiting to step on a bomb. I'm on eggshells around you despite just wanting what's best for you. And yet when Kurotsuchi tells you not to do something, you don't snap at her. Why Eren, what have I ever done to you to deserve this?"
The fact that he could relate to Mikasa's current issue because of his own insecurities unsettled Eren. But for the first time in a long time, Mikasa wasn't just his sister or the girl that was tagging along next to him. She wasn't the girl he had merely saved. She was her own person, and it had happened sometime in the past few years without him noticing. Every time he thought about how useless he was compared to the rest of his family, it was a crushing weight that wouldn't leave his mind. He had more than a few sleepless nights whenever it crossed his mind. To think he had been subjecting Mikasa to something similar for so long. The fact that even despite that, she could see right through him even now was staggering, and a testament to just how much she cared.
"I'm sorry, Mikasa." He said honestly as he wrapped what he hoped was a comforting arm her shoulders for the first time. He ignored how she tensed at first before she relaxed back into his embrace. Maybe this was how it should have always been, Eren mused. Maybe he should have taken the role of big brother to this wonderful girl before she was forced to become his big sister.
"To tell you the truth, you annoyed me. The way you behaved I felt like you were always planning on replacing my mother. You did practically everything I told you to, like some sort of human doll just because I saved your life. And I hated that. You were a constant shadow, nagging me at every turn when I just wanted to do whatever I wanted. You weren't a person of your own, and I couldn't respect that. But now, you have grown Mikasa. And I see you now." He admitted.
"Let us get one thing straight," Mikasa said, turning slowly to face him with one of her rare small smiles. "I am not your slave. You have an issue with me trying to care of you, fine. I know that. But that's because I think you can't take care of yourself. How many times were you injured enough that if you were human you would be dead?"
Eren had a feeling that his words in Trost the day before hadn't been forgotten. He chuckled as they went at the same argument again, though this time it was different, at least now he could better understand where she was coming from. In fact, this was possibly the first time that they were exchanging proper sibling banter. This wasn't the reprimands or orders they were so used to giving one another. Eren knew they could both feel that something in their relationship had shifted, that there was no longer and older and a younger sibling. They were now simply siblings, of equal hopes and expectations.
"Touche. But yesterday we were at war!" Eren countered with a bright smile.
"And yet I was not physically injured to the extent you were." Mikasa replied succinctly. "You are careless and rash a lot of the time Eren. I try to take care of you in any way that I know how, I owe you that much for saving my life. Yet no matter what approach I use you never listen. Honestly the only one you listen to is Naruto, and he beats sense into you. If that is the only method you respond to without behaving like a petty child then that is how I will deal with you as well."
"Was that a joke? That's a joke right?" Eren asked unsurely. He could feel his limbs healing at the moment and he kind of deserved it, but he really hoped this wasn't going to become the new norm of how Mikasa reacted if he did something she didn't like.
Oh well he would definitely cut her some slack now. He wouldn't always like how she tended to mother him, but he could bear with it better now for both of their sakes.
"And I do live for myself Eren," Mikasa finished without answering his question. "Maybe before, it was all about you since you were all that I had left to keep me human. My first friend, my first savior, and then my brother. But not anymore. I can be selfish sometimes."
Her fingers idly played with some of the hair next to her ears as she said this.
Eren stole a glance at her hair that hung behind her like curtain of darkness and stopped right before it reached her lower back. They had been in their rooms which explained why it hadn't been tied up, and yet Eren couldn't help but wonder how it never got in the way of her fights. One thing was clear however, if she wore the red scarf to symbolize her brotherhood with Eren, she wore her long hair to proudly display her connection with Naruto who had convinced her to grow it out.
He had a flashback to the dream or vision he had seen before he woke up and nodded. His sister hadn't been wearing the red scarf in that dream for whatever reason but her hair had definitely been long. If Mikasa lived solely for anyone, it was no longer him. He mattered greatly to her and she struggled to show it, but he suspected Naruto came first.
He really hoped it had just been a bad dream. But for that he needed another opinion, and it couldn't be Mikasa's because he wasn't sure how she would react.
"Got it sis, promise. You can treat me however I deserve but I can't promise I'll change. Sound good?" Eren offered, unwilling to have this argument now with such a heavy weight in his mind. He would be more tolerant of Mikasa's actions, and he hoped she would concede as well. But for now he needed a lighter topic as he healed and they stared out at the fields in front of them.
They both smiled when they caught sight of Naruto practically skipping towards the mess hall.
"We both know what's for lunch then," Eren chuckled as he stood, his limbs fully healed as he dusted off his clothes. "I'm starving too. I'm gonna go apologize to him as we eat, while he's in a good mood."
Eren's stomach grumbled loudly enough for them both to hear, and a small smile ghosted at Mikasa's lips. The green eyed boy pretended he didn't notice either of them.
"You coming?" He asked instead and offered his hand to help her stand.
"No, I already ate." She replied as she took the offered hand and helped herself up. "I'll think I'll just go and take a nap. Annie's crystal is still in Naruto's room."
A stray thought popped into Eren's head at the mention of Annie and he couldn't help but ask.
"Why do you and Annie get along so well Mikasa? I mean I don't think I'd ever heard you two talk, and I kind of expected you two would be fighting over Naruto's attention or something."
"Everyone has a monster inside of them Eren," Mikasa said as she finished dusting off her clothes and looked him in the eye. "Annie and I, just happen to be of a similar kind."
She did not elaborate afterwards and Eren decided as he watched her walk off that he was better off not knowing what went on in the minds of the two girls.
Instead he walked off silently to the mess hall, deep in thought.
Eren would never call himself humble, of that he had been certain. True, he may have managed to curb acting on his over confident impulses over the years but the simple fact was he knew he was dangerous. Bar shinobi with all their superhuman tricks, Eren had the durability, power, and skill to outclass every normal human. Even his skill with the mobility gear was nothing to scoff at. Add all of this with his determination and drive and there was very little threat to him from titan and human alike. But shinobi and demons were obviously a different matter.
Even with his newfound titan form, he could not be confident against shinobi. What they did were like something from myths. Just because he regenerated really fast and could summon a titan he couldn't even control didn't mean they were any less of a threat to him.
Then there was Naruto. His big brother had always been strong, and Eren held no illusions about that. But with Naruto's heritage revealed his brother's abilities had shot so far ahead that Eren could no longer relate. What was he in the face of that? And yet he wasn't afraid, nor did he hate Naruto in any way. Mikasa had been right. His love for them had brought Naruto back from succumbing to the lust of power and it had dragged him away from the despair of loneliness. And the tangible proof of how much his brother loved them only served to deepen Eren's admiration of him.
Mikasa was right. He had been insensitive. Naruto had just experienced a moment of self doubt and instead of reassuring him that their opinions of him hadn't changed, he had left in a pointless fit of rage at himself. He was lucky that Naruto didn't seem to have taken it to heart and was happily skipping off to lunch.
Container or not, human or not, Naruto had always been there for them ever since Carla had adopted him. It went unsaid, but he was their superior, even if only Eren and Armin viewed him that way sometimes. He stood in as the father of their family. But in the end he was also their brother, and because of that Eren wouldn't care if Naruto was in fact a demon lord. None of them in their family was a saint, and none of them pretended to be one. The important part was for them, Naruto had rejected an ancient demon of terrifying power. His brother may be a long way from ever nearing the frightening power of the demon, but the simple fact was that there were powers out there that dwarfed Eren on such ridiculous scale it was almost funny, and he hated it.
Sasuke was still a sore issue, and Eren would never forgive him. But he wouldn't allow that bastard to drive a wedge between his family. He hadn't even managed to permanently hurt anyone. Sure he caused Naruto to go berserk, but in a way the idiot had accidentally helped Naruto become something so much more. Eren smirked when he realized just how badly Sasuke's plans had backfired on him almost all throughout yesterday. Served him right.
Instead now that he had calmed down, Eren found that he pitied the Uchiha. Naruto hadn't let him off as easy as he had initially thought. Not only did Sasuke have to live with the fact that he could no longer hurt their family, but Naruto had also reopened a gaping wound. Then he had to watch the person he had fallen in love with die, as well as the death of his entire family at the hands of his idolized brother. The equivalent would be him having to watch Naruto kill off Mikasa, Annie, and Armin with him helpless to stop it.
He clenched his fist. Naruto's oath had been to prevent anything happening to Sasuke. Naruto had held fast to his oath. Eren was not the best with loopholes, but he noticed something that either Naruto had done on purpose or both his brother and Sasuke had been oblivious to it. Naruto simply had to prevent his family from doing anything to Sasuke. But if Eren did something on his own without Naruto knowing then Naruto wouldn't be breaking his oath and Sasuke would be helpless to fight back. A savage grin lit up his face momentarily. He wouldn't go searching for Sasuke with murder on his mind, but if he ever ran into that asshole the world would have one less Uchiha to worry about.
The important was Eren didn't have to waste anymore time worrying about Sasuke and could instead focus on other matters.
It was a little strange if you asked him, to know irrefutably that there was life that existed outside the walls. He had known that Annie also originated from the outside, but only now did he fully see proof of civilization. A lot of it had been Konoha's interior from Sasuke's memories, but there had also been detailed images of Paradis from Annie's. He clenched his fist again and stopped walking to take a deep breath as his thoughts once again drifted to Grisha. That man would have a lot to answer for when he met him again, but Mikasa was right, stressing out over it now would help nobody.
In an effort to think about anything else his thoughts then went back to Kurotsuchi and his stomach gave a lurch. It hurt, now that he thought about it. He had never truly lied to his best friend. There were obvious secrets he had to keep, such as their abilities and the Underworld Sanctuary, but he had been forthcoming with pretty much everything else. She knew him arguably the best, and yet how could she even hold a conversation about the future with him when she had this over their heads. Did he even really know her? Or was it all just an act?
Sure Eren now knew that the shinobi weren't really a threat to the family, thankfully, but had she ever been planning to reveal this to him? Or had Kurotsuchi been content to spend time with him for the short time they lasted. Did he even have a place in her future?
He had always been on the edge of committing to a relationship with her, provided she came clean and wasn't a threat. But now that it had come to pass and both sides knew more about the other, he was no longer so sure. Was she even half as committed to him as he had been to her? Eren didn't know, and if these talks scheduled around a month from now did not go well then there was a chance they would never see each other again. But would she even care?
Eren caught sight of Armin, who was also walking towards the mess hall. Haku intercepted Armin on the way and as they fell in step side by side Eren surprised himself when he had to fight down a sudden surge of jealousy.
At least there was no longer any doubt how much Haku cared about Armin, enough to completely throw away her old life. Then again there was also a reason he had fallen for Kurotsuchi and not the ice user, and that was the difference in their personalities. Haku was kind, gentle, and had a peaceful heart and if Eren didn't know she was a shinobi he would have called her a pacifist. Kurotsuchi on the other hand was outspoken, brash, headstrong, and incredibly stubborn. He liked her, he really did. But Eren knew she was ambitious as well. She could reach high places in her world, in these Elemental Nations. Eren would be proud of her if could reach them.
He just didn't know if she ever envisioned him being alongside her for those dreams of hers. And that doubt was what was slowly eating at him. She may have said her village came first to Shikamaru in the memory, but Eren could not say with confidence that she was only saying that to placate her squad leader.
At least Naruto had arranged for both of them to be the messengers. At least he could finally ask her in the end where she stood. If the talks did not go well and they avoided the Elemental Nations, would she go with him? Or would he let her return home? Because Eren was certain of one thing, he was not abandoning his own family.
And that was the final thing he needed an answer to.
Had his dream been simply a dream? Or had it been a warning of the time to come? Could he even change it? He looked down at his hand and could not shake the sense of horror. Was this hand really going to be the one to kill his brother? Was Naruto 'He who must die'? Or was it someone Naruto had forgiven, like Sasuke? And why did it have to be him? What changed? Why would he and Armin side against Annie and Mikasa?
Eren's eyes widened as he remembered a few other details. There had been shinobi everywhere in that dreaded battlefield. Was it a coincidence he had this dream now? What if he could change it? What if his family had nothing to do with any shinobi at all. It was not the best of plans, but if by some serious luck it worked then maybe that vision wouldn't come to pass.
"Eren?"
Eren looked up, realizing that he had spaced out and was now standing in front of Naruto, Armin, and Haku who were holding their trays of food and looking at him questioningly.
"I… want to say I'm sorry. For being a jerk earlier. We didn't get to decide anything and I forgot to say that you're still my brother and I don't think any worse of you." Eren said sheepishly.
"Mikasa talked some sense into you already?" Armin asked skeptically. "That was strangely quick."
"I wouldn't say they just talked," Farlan laughed from his table next to the window as he beckoned them over to sit with him. "But I must say now I understand why the boss doesn't want to piss her off."
Eren felt his cheeks heat up in embarrassment. How many people had seen what happened between him and Mikasa?
"So she beat some sense into you then!" Naruto laughed loudly as he wrapped his free arm around Eren's shoulders. "Can't say I expected her to do that but hey, if it works it works."
"You aren't mad?" Eren asked.
"I don't think I could ever stay mad at you guys for very long," Naruto admitted as he ruffled Eren's hair. "Especially when there's ramen involved!"
"I'll pass," Eren scoffed with an eye roll. "There's cheeseburgers on the menu today at least, that's awesome."
Eren wasn't the only one to chuckle at the look of utter blasphemy on Naruto's face as the whiskered boy began to rant about why ramen was far superior to a mere burger. But Eren's resolve was firmly set in that moment as he gazed fondly at his brother's antics. This, right here. This was a man was worth protecting. Nobody was going to take Naruto away from them. Not titans, not Orochimaru, not shinobi, and above all, not him.
A/N: Hello folks, here with another chapter. Is anyone else getting super hyped for the last three chapters of the manga? No spoilers! But this has got to be some of the best writing ever. Hats off to Isayama, seriously.
On a more serious note, please just be thankful with the latest season of the anime and that we're getting it sooner rather than later. The bashing on Mappa Studio is unwarranted and the fact that they are insanely rushed while also working on other animes means that they feel like all their hard work is unwanted. They might even wash their hands of the thing entirely... which would undoubtedly suck for all of us.
So yeah, see you guys again soon! Please drop a review too hehe.
