Amethyst fell into step with Chevron, and she didn't think she'd ever felt so… out of place.

Hell, she felt more out of place on this planet than she'd ever felt on Earth, and that in itself was saying something. Earth was her home through and through, and even when she'd felt like she didn't have a home there, the planet in itself never ceased to be anything less. But she'd never quite thought about it like that before; the Earth was everything she'd ever known, so there was no reason to even consider other planets. Even when she'd heard about Homeworld, and…

… well…

Learning about the Diamonds had… been… something. She'd never really heard 'stories', just brief mentions. Rose never spoke about them and what little information she could get from Pearl and Garnet (or cared to receive from Pearl and Garnet, for that matter) hadn't really been enough for her to form any real opinion on them. They were the bad guys, the Crystal Gems were the good guys. And that was about as far as Amethyst's thoughts on the Diamonds went. Except, of course, for one. White Diamond. Oh, her name would get stuck in Amethyst's head on a loop for days if she didn't figure out a way to distract herself from it. Thoughts of her would subside and rise again spontaneously, randomly, in short, fleeting bursts. With those thoughts came emotions Amethyst never really cared to look too deeply into. Though, she'd tried her best not to do that anyways.

The constant ache in her chest and the crack in her gem was the biggest reason why.

She wished she could explain it, but she didn't know how. Thoughts of White Diamond would come and linger, and she'd feel… she'd feel something. She'd feel everything. Every emotion combined into one, a kind of pressure, a tug, a… an instinct. Yeah, that was it. It was an instinct. Impulse. Compulsion. For what, she still didn't know. She knew that it made her uncomfortable.

The small Quartz sucked in a breath through her teeth and squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. With everything that had happened the past few days - meeting White Diamond, the war, Steven getting shattered, Steven surviving and then immediately being taken by White Diamond, and just, god, everything, everything, everything - she'd had so little time to process. Blue Diamond and her stupid fucking powers had only served to make things worse in the long run. She'd be fine if not for that; she'd had a handle on her defect ever since Rose disappeared. That one crack after Steven had been taken had been a fluke, a loss of control. But Blue Diamond's powers might as well have been a weapon coming at her, one she couldn't dodge. All that negativity, all that emotion, all that pain. God, Amethyst had tried so hard to ignore it at first, but it only got stronger and stronger and stronger, and then finally she felt it, that pressure. That familiar pressure that built up in her gem, pushing from the inside out, until finally…

And now that she was cracked, it would be so, so, so easy for even one stray emotion to catch her off guard, so she had to watch herself. Either that, or she'd have to poof herself again.

(And, ah, she didn't want to do that.)

She needed a distraction. Unfortunately, she figured the best one was probably the gem beside her, and although she really, truly, honestly wanted nothing to do with her at all, she'd suck it up for the time being for the sake of keeping that crack in her gem as small as she possibly could.

"So," she piped up, and Chevron's head turned toward her briefly as they walked, making their way through the crowds of gems cleaning up. Amethyst would have definitely given anything to be able to join them right then, instead of heading to where she knew damn well she was heading. Oh, she was not looking forward to this. She had a feeling she wouldn't be walking out of there with her gem intact. "Whyyyy… couldn't White just get me herself? With the bubble?"

Chevron huffed out a laugh, finally glancing at her. "I volunteered to get you myself."

"Oh, yeah?" Amethyst raised an eyebrow, trying not to feel too unsettled. "Why'ssat?"

"Honestly? I was curious." Chevron chuckled, raising a hand to run her fingers through her hair. Amethyst frowned at that, glancing away from her only to make sure she didn't trip over pieces of rubble still strewn across the ground, and listened without looking back up as she continued, "Iiii mean, I've never met another Amethyst like me before, you know?"

"Like you?" Amethyst echoed, pursing her lips into a scowl for a moment. What a cruel, twisted joke it was - a long time ago, maybe, she'd have damn near preened at the thought. Chevron was a bitch, after all, but she was much bigger and buff-er and probably even stronger than Amethyst was. A while ago, Amethyst would have taken such a thing as a compliment of sorts. Now she wanted nothing more than to beat this gem into a pulp and show her exactly where their 'similarities' ended. The Quartz rolled her eyes, blowing her hair out of her face, and reminded herself once again not to get too worked up. "Uh, yeah, no. We're not the same."

Chevron hummed. "We're much more alike than you think," she commented, stretching her arms behind her head as she walked. "You know, where it really counts? Our gems, right?"

Amethyst snorted out a laugh despite herself, shooting her a dubious look before rooting her gaze ahead again. They weren't heading to White Diamond's ship or the palace… she slowed her pace a little, wariness rapidly taking hold, but she didn't say anything about it just yet.

"I'm not flattered," she responded. "You might be an Amethyst, but you are not a Famethyst."

"Oh." Chevron pursed her lips. "You misunderstood."

Amethyst flicked her gaze to the side, eyes narrowing faintly. "What d'you mean?"

"Oh… nothing." Chevron waved a hand dismissively, flashing her another smile that made Amethyst want to pull her teeth out one by one. "My Diamond will enlighten you soon enough, I'm sure. I guess it's not really my place. After all, my orders were only to retrieve you." She paused, looking ahead of them. "I assume it has something to do with Steven and Aster."

Amethyst slowed to a stop, alarm rapidly replacing the irritation building up, and cast the other gem a long, wary look. Chevron slowed with her, turning with an almost expectant expression on her face while the smaller Quartz took a moment to get her emotions under control again, taking a deep breath to calm herself and trying to force some of the tension out of her form. Remembering that Chevron had been the first to visit them in the tower helped a little bit, though considering how averse they'd seemed to the mere thought of the other gem, Amethyst was quick to doubt the fact that Aster had introduced himself - and even quicker to doubt the thought that Steven would have. And then there was the fact that Chevron was even using their names.

"You know who they are." It wasn't a question.

Chevron inclined her head, looking thoughtful for a moment. "I know… more than you think."

Amethyst pressed her lips into a thin line, glancing away. This conversation was heading into dangerous territory, and she didn't think she was going to like where it was going. She allowed herself, for a moment, to focus on the ache thrumming through her gemstone, the pain flushing through her form, and while it did little to ease the tension building up, it was an ever-so-subtle reminder that some distractions could very easily turn into the thing she needed to distract herself from. Sometimes she just needed to know when to back out of a situation. When it would be worth it to push her own luck. And now was one of the times she knew she couldn't risk it.

The distorted hum of her gem sang like sirens, a constant warning in itself. She didn't look at Chevron after that, adamantly staring past her, and replied with a simple, "let's keep going."

They did. And, finally, Amethyst realized why they weren't going to White Diamond's head ship, or the palace. Because she wasn't inside. She was on the other side of a cluster of buildings that had survived the war (and Amethyst couldn't help but feel some kind of relief when she saw it, despite the fact that she didn't have many feelings for the planet itself, because at least something other than the palace and White Diamond's ship and that tower had survived it all).

She stepped over clumps of gem shards, ignored them for the sake of the stability of her own gem, and lifted her gaze to where White Diamond was standing, helping the other gems by picking up handful after handful of chunks of rubble from explosions that had taken down nearby buildings. The Quartz froze beside one of the structures still standing, and Chevron kept going.

White Diamond was-

Magnificent.

Breathtaking.

Beautiful.

Stunning.

The emotions that flushed through her were unparalleled. Blinding and fast and strong and Amethyst didn't stand a chance against them, not even for a second. Warmth spread through her completely, and her gem buzzed and hummed and glowed, whether in response to them or as a protest or a warning, Amethyst didn't know. But she did know she wasn't built for such a thing, and it only took a second for a rush of pain to shoot through her, quick like the crack and snap of a whip, and she bit down on her lip to keep back a gasp and blinked the tears out of her eyes as they came, feeling her form ripple and shift as it destabilized. She could feel herself distorting, a painful and dizzying experience, and everything around her became a blur of colors and a buzz of movement and life she was only half-aware of. Almost everything else had been completely flushed out by the pain crackling through her, and the emotions that had caused it.

The words her mind was supplying instinctively - impulsively - wasn't helping much either. Amethyst shuddered as each one passed through her head seamlessly, echoing around like words being screamed into an empty cavern, a bottomless pit. She was sure the cracks were spreading now, she was certain she was going to break and shatter under the force of whatever the fuck she was feeling any second now, and yet she didn't. Somehow, she didn't. Somehow, when White Diamond turned toward her, as Chevron brought the small Quartz to her attention, she was stable. Aside from the crack in her gem, the pain flushing through her form and the fact that she felt ready to destabilize at any damn second now, somehow, she was standing stable.

She met White Diamond's gaze, breath hitching on an inhale, and blinked the remaining tears out of her eyes and just stared. With her mouth open, mind whirring, gem buzzing, she stared.

White Diamond was-

Radiant.

-terrifying-

Exquisite.

-and Amethyst couldn't explain why-

Elegant.

-but she could only describe what she was feeling now as complete and utter adoration-

Perfect.

-and dear god, it was going to be the death of her.